All language subtitles for My Favorite Martian s01e33 Oh My Aching Antenna

Hi, Uncle Martin.

Hey, Toro.

Toro.

Ole!

Now, come on, Uncle Martin.

Will you cut that out?

Well, that's more like it. Now, why did
you turn invisible just to do the

housework?

Oh, Tim, I didn't hear you come in.

Uncle Martin.

You're home early. I didn't intend for
you to see me like this. What happened?

You look like something from outer
space.

I mean... Well, that's all right. You
don't need to apologize.

If you must know, this is a... youth
pack.

Youth pack?

Now, listen, take away the wrinkles.

My face is collapsing.

It is? I wasn't going to tell you, but
my hair is turning gray, too. I've been

touching it up so you wouldn't notice.

You've been dyeing your hair?

I thought that Martians had no patience
with vanity.

Well, it's not funny, Tim.

I'm getting desperate. Well...

Oh, come on. Now, you have to expect to
age a little. I mean, after all, a man

450 years old?

I wouldn't be falling apart if I was on
Mars.

It's the gravity here that's doing it.
It's worse than your smog.

Gravity? Yes, it's what makes you
earthlings age so much faster than

I'm getting stiffening of the antenna,
too.

And my energy is so depleted that I can
hardly get out of bed.

Well, that sounds pretty serious.

Yeah, Tim, I'm like a deep -sea diver
who has sunk beyond his depth.

I'm slowly being crushed by pressure.

Well, what can we do about it? Well, my
problem is how to degravitize myself,

relieve this intolerable pressure, and
restore my metabolism so I can once

resist Earth's gravity.

How do you do that?

Well, I haven't quite figured it out
yet, but I'm concentrating on the

How long do you have?

I mean... It's all right, Tim.

I know what you mean.

Two weeks.

Ten days, if I'm lucky.

Uncle Martin, you've got to concentrate
harder.

Well, I'll try.

That's it.

Come on, Uncle Martin. Harder. More.
More.

Oh, my aching antenna.

Tim, would you please stop worrying so I
can get some sleep?

I'm sorry, Uncle Martin. I didn't
realize my bare feet were making so much

noise. It wasn't your feet that woke me.

It was your thinking.

Oh, well, my mind just keeps turning
over and over.

Yeah, I know that.

That way, neither one of us can get any
sleep. But, Uncle Martin, you can't

sleep. You've got to stay awake and
concentrate on how to save yourself. How

many times must I tell you we Martians
solve our most difficult problems only

when we sleep?

You didn't tell me that. I must have.

Well, I don't remember.

We simply program the facts in
continuity and feed the problem into our

much as you earthlings wire a board for
one of your primitive digital computers.

We then go to sleep and let our brain
work out the problem.

You do?

No. I almost had it, and then you woke
me up.

Oh, I'm sorry, Uncle Martin. Look, go
back to sleep. Maybe you'll pick up

you left off.

All right. Well, I'll try for your sake.
For my sake?

Well, gravity's not affecting me.

No, but the authorities might if I die.

Don't say that.

Well, you know how it is.

Lots of people don't know you're alive
until you drop dead.

Then after you're gone, they can't wait
to find out all about you.

Well, who, for instance? Well, the
Bureau of Internal Revenue, the State

Board, and the City Board of Health.

How could you expect them to believe I
was a victim of Earth's gravity?

I couldn't. Look, go back to sleep so
you can get the answer.

All right, I'll try.

I've got it.

Plus nine to the twelfth power minus X
pi squared.

I can fabricate an equalizer. You can?

But I'll need two of them, Tim.

The components are in the spaceship's
miniaturized navigation analog computer.

You can help me tear it down. Tear it
down?

But, Uncle Martin, how will you get back
to Mars?

Tim, if I'm not degravitized soon, I
won't live long enough to make the trip.

Now, come on.

Help me down to the garage.

All right, Tim.

Strap them on me.

No, no, no. It's got to be around.

Okay. Here, turn your wrist over. Make
it easy.

Okay. I sure hope these work, Uncle
Morton.

Don't worry, Tim.

They will.

You'll see.

Turn over now a little bit.

Let's see.

There. Do you feel any better? Not yet.
The power hasn't been turned on.

You can turn the dials now.

Only to the first amper.

All right.

Uncle Martin, what happened?

Tim, do something!

Hurry, Tim, hurry, do something! Turn me
off, turn me off!

I'm trying, I can't catch him!

Please, Tim!

Hurry!

Tim!

I made it.

Is that the way it's supposed to work?
No.

You made a mistake and... I made a
mistake. Well, in a way, it was partly

fault. I forgot to mention that these
devices are something like AC and DC.

Oh, I guess we sort of short -circuited
you, huh? Something like that.

Unless each is worn on the proper wrist.

The polarity is reversed, and, well, you
know the rest.

If you'll just reverse these, they'll
work all right.

Okay. They're all set. Now what?

Same as before, but remember, only turn
them to the first ampere. Why? I just

thought I'd spare you that messy detail.

Messy? Tim, if I'm degravitized too
quickly, I'll explode.

All over the place.

Yes, I guess that would be messy.

Are you sure you want to go through with
this?

I'll turn the dials myself this time.

If something should go wrong, I
certainly wouldn't want you to blame

You've been wonderful to me, Tim.

So just remember, I didn't have much
time left anyway.

But Uncle Martin... It works!

It works. The centripetal force is
relieved.

I've been liberated.

What a weird feeling.

I never anticipated this would have an
effect on anyone but myself.

How long do you have to use those
things, Uncle Martin?

I figure it'll take about a week. A
week?

Well, there'll be no problem, Tim.

I'll just turn myself off whenever
you're in the same room with me.

Well, how's it going to be any good if
it's turned off?

I can't.

But I'll make up for lost time by
increasing the power when you're not

Oh. Well, that sounds reasonable.

Look, Uncle Martin, I've got to get
dressed or I'm going to be late for

Now, you're sure you're going to be all
right?

Fine, Tim. You go right ahead.

I didn't think the power would penetrate
that far.

Maybe I'd better take a room with the Y
until you get back to normal.

Bring a room with the Y for what?

To avoid getting my brains knocked out.
Now, if I'm going to hit the ceiling

every time you take one of those
treatments... Oh, you won't. Now that

of the strength of this device, I've
decided only to use it while you're

I mean out of the apartment, I promise.

One of us has got to go.

Look, look.

That's the reason I called you to come
home.

That's Mrs. Brown's wisteria vine.
What's it doing in here?

I'm not sure, but I refuse to share the
same room with it. It's not safe.

Not safe?

Every time I turn on the power, it comes
a little closer. I'm exhausted from

turning myself on and off all day long.

Oh, well, I'll just go out and print a
bit.

Why are you wearing that thing?

Well, it's a deep sea diver's outfit.

full power and I won't hit the ceiling.

Very ingenious of you, Tim.

I'm proud of you.

Let's try it and see how it works.

All right.

There, you see what I mean?

I dozed off with the power turned on and
when I woke up, When I woke up, it was

coming at me, just like that.

I don't understand.

Now,

do you believe me?

I woke up just in the nick of time, or
that thing would have been in bed with

me. Tim, you've got to cut it down.

I guess you're right, Uncle Martin.

Well, I hate to think about what Mrs.

Brown's going to say, though. You know
how she feels about her plants.

Oh, Lord,

quick, turn yourself off. Mrs. Brown's
coming over for some soup.

Well, the only way I could get Mrs.
Brown to forgive me for cutting down the

vine was to tell her that it made you
sick.

Yes, well, I'm turning myself on and off
so much that it is making me sick.

Well, what do you taste your soup? It's
parsnip. Oh, no.

Oh,

thank you.

Shame on you, Martin, for not letting me
know you hadn't been feeling well.

Well, it's just a touch of vinus.

Vinus?

Wisteria vinus.

Oh, yes.

Well, you eat this soup. It'll perk you
up. It's a real tonic. Oh, my, you do

look peaked. You should get more sun,
Martin.

I will. I will just as soon as I feel up
to it. Why don't you sit outside

tomorrow and watch me work in my garden?

I'm going to plant some sweet corn.
Won't that be fun?

Well, I can see you're tired, so I'll
leave now. Now, if there's anything you

need... No, we'll call you.

Oh, all right. Now, you see that he eats
his soup. Oh, yes, I will. Thank you

very much.

Bye -bye, Miss Brown.

Can I turn myself on now?

No, no, no. Wait till I get into my
safety belt.

Will you hurry up?

I haven't done that since I was in
ballet school.

She got a jolt of it just as she hit the
driveway.

You know she's right about my needing
the sun?

The ferritization benefits from
ultraviolet rays.

Yeah, well, you know, as long as Mrs.
Brown thinks that you're sick, she's

to be up here every few hours trying to
help.

Shh. Let me think.

By altering the current variance of the
spheroidal wave function from sigma

third prime to the finite of G minus, a
differential of the FBA elliptic

integrals, uh -huh, I'll do it.

What'll do what?

I'm going to modify these so I can keep
myself turned on without affecting other

people. Then it'll be safe for me to go
out and get some sun. Bring my tools,

Tim.

I sure am glad you got those things
fixed, Uncle Martin.

Yes, I imagine it's quite a relief not
to need that diving suit anymore.

Well, it's not so bad walking around,
you know, but wearing it to bed. Oh,

last night it was murder.

I kept dreaming I was in traction.

Remarkable. I'm taking nearly 50 % of
the power and you don't feel a thing.

Oh, are you increasing it?

Reducing it. I explained that I can only
take a slight increase at a time.

Well, how do you know when you've had
too much?

My ears start to buzz.

Would you care to take a stroll with me?

No, no, no, no. I have a brand new idea
for a novel.

Another one?

You haven't finished the last four you
started.

Well, this will be different.

Oh,

hello, Martin.

Oh, you just sit here and you sap up
that sunshine while I finish planning my

sweet corn.

Oh, how's Tim?

Fine. Fine. He's upstairs writing
another book. Oh, I just love gardening.

If I had more space, I'd have a
greenhouse.

Why, I might even become an expert like
Easel.

Like who?

Easel. He's my new gardener.

He's a senior student in agriculture at
college, and he's an absolute magician

with plants.

Oh, Easel, I want you to meet someone.

Easel, this is Mr.

Martin O 'Hara.

Hi, Dad.

I couldn't have missed a patch that big.
I was telling Mr. O 'Hara about your

studying.

What's its name?

Agrobiology. Oh, I can never remember
that word.

It's the science of plant growth and
nutrition as applied to the improvement

crops and the control of soil.

Yeah, Dad, that's it.

Is that the required campus haircut for
agrobiologists?

Oh,

it's not my hair.

This just keeps me from getting too much
sun.

Maybe it's not working today.

Smoothie -oobie.

Sweet boy.

Mrs. Brown, might I trouble you for a
drink of water?

How about a tall glass of fresh
lemonade?

Fine, fine, just fine, fine.

In about four months, I'll be offering
you homegrown corn on the cob.

I don't believe it, but there it is.
Look at it. Just look at it.

It's nice, isn't it? Nice?

She just planted that a few minutes ago.

How did you ever do that, Easel? How did
I do it? How did she do it? I planted

it just like you told me to when you
gave me the seed.

Wait, Easel, where are you going?

Oh, uh, Mrs. Brown, I wanted for you to
excuse me. I've got to get back to the

apartment.

Isn't that wonderful?

And go out there and stop Mrs. Brown's
gardener.

Stop him? Yes, I read his mind.

He's gone to his truck to get
instruments to find out why that corn

fast. It's these things.

They turn seeds into full -grown plants
in less than a minute.

They did?

Easel has electronic detection gear that
can lead him right to the spaceship in

the garage.

Need I explain more? That college boy
can ruin me. But how am I supposed to

him? Detain him.

Interfere with him. Keep him away from
the garage. Just give me five minutes,

Tim. Well, what are you going to do? I'm
going to give myself the full charge.

I don't know whether I can take it or
not, but there's nothing left to do.

look, just to be safe, you stay away
from the garage, okay? But, Uncle

can't go down there and do that. It's
impossible.

All right.

172.

I'm going to get my camera and take a
picture of this.

Uh,

you must be Ezel. Huh?

You must be Ezel. Yeah. Ah!

Some kind of nut?

Stand aside, you're blocking science.

I'm trying to find out what made it grow
so fast, Mrs. B.

Ooh.

Ooh, I'm getting a buzz.

There's metal in here someplace.

Oh, my trowel. I wondered where I left
it.

What the hell is that?

It's a very delicate detection
instrument that we use in the college

Now we'll get to the bottom of this
business.

Would you care to walk, Mrs. Brown?

Look, will you quit fooling around?

I'm trying to solve a mystery here.

Sorry, old boy.

Mrs. Brown, is there a ham in the
neighborhood?

Yes, there's an actor who lives right
down the street.

I mean an amateur radio operator. I
think his signals are following up my

detective. Hello, Uncle Martin.

I'm going to get the professor. He'll
help me solve this. Oh, wait, Diesel. I

have a theory about that corn. Like
what?

Now, you gave Mrs. Brown the seeds,
which you got from the college.

And you've been experimenting with
atomic radiated seed corn.

That's secret. How did you know about
it? I learned it from you.

Now, I suggest that accidentally you
gave Mrs. Brown some of those atomic

kernels. Or, again, just by accident,
some of the kernels fell from your

during your gardening chores.

Well, even so, they don't make instant
plants.

Well, they might, if they've been
planted in the proper environment.

No, it's impossible. They only...

Look!

It's happening again!

Ah, yes, it is. And look here, right
beside it.

A kernel that hasn't been planted. One
of yours.

That's one of them, all right.

Man, I'm going to upset the world.

I'm going to make Luther Burbank look
like a bush leaguer.

Roasting here, anyone?

Ah, Tim, I feel wonderful.

My resistance to gravity is completely
restored.

We'll get along just fine now.

Well, that's just great, because rumor
has it that gravity is here to stay.

What did you do with the things?

Dismantled them and reinstalled the
components in the spaceship.

And if all goes well, I'll be returning
to Mars in about three months.

Let's drink to that, Tim.

Well, we're out of coffee.

Oh, well, don't get up, don't get up.
I'll get it.

Uncle Martin, cut the clowning. I'm
sorry, Tim, but would you mind getting

parts out of the spaceship for me just
once more?

You mean you're not really cured?

Not quite.

The shock treatment didn't take a case
of too much too quick.

But you said... I said I'd be fine, and
I will.

I just need a few more hours, eh, Tim?
Are you sure?

Absolutely positive. I know exactly what
to do and how to do it this time.

Okay, well, I'll get the parts.

And, Tim, don't forget my tools.

Oh, my aching antenna.