Original subtitles

Lightning?

Storm?

Huh? Tim!

Just a minute, Bridget.

Tim!

I'm coming!

Tim! Tim! We must check that barometer downstairs.

I can't always expect to wake up when lightning flashes.

Well, the market was working, I thought.

Maybe it fell or something. You know, that sometimes can throw it off of its

readings. You know, as I've explained to you before, if I'm to stay here on

Earth with you in this apartment, I must have an accurate barometer available to

me at all times.

You ready?

All right.

Easy, easy.

Easy, easy.

No, no, no, no, no.

There you are.

That'll hold you for a while.

I hope so.

You remember what happened last time, don't you? Oh, yeah.

With you popping in and out like a duck at a shooting gallery?

Pops, as we call it.

Being hit by lightning without being properly grounded is not funny to a

Martian. And then you start appearing and disappearing with no control

whatsoever. There are many things that can happen to me and my jeopardy on

Earth, but the most distasteful of all is Popsie, popping in and out, never

knowing if you're coming or going. That reminds me. I was having a wonderful

dream about Brigitte Bardot and the Beatles. Now, maybe if I just hurry on

to sleep.

That Tim is really a good boy.

I guess I should be more grateful to him.

After all, it isn't easy to learn to wire a Martian.

I mean, if he didn't really put his mind to it, it's so easy to make a mistake.

Yeah.

did not make a mistake. I've wired you many times, and even if I were half

awake, I told you I could do it in my sleep, and I can.

Then would you please tell me what went wrong?

How can I tell you when you're not here?

Here, here, will you stay here?

Do you think I like it? I can't help myself. My stomach feels like the inside

a loop -de -loop.

There, you see? I even disappear without my antennas up.

Uncle Martin, I know I wired you correctly.

Now, of all the things that happened to you, I know that Popsie is one of the

worst. Believe me, I get just as shook up and shaky watching you as you do.

Doing what you're doing.

Which I know you don't do.

Do you?

If you wired me correctly, if you were really positive... I am.

Then I'm short -circuited. There must have been an overload in my system.

What do we do now?

Long -circuit me.

How do we do that?

Hook me in circuit with a TV antenna.

Then we go to the toaster.

Next, we go to the coffee percolator and then to the blender.

But don't plug me into house current.

Yeah? Here I am in the living room.

Next, we go through the three -way lamp. Then we anchor down to the doorknob.

That's brass, and if I hold on to it, I can be ground round.

Ground round?

Ground round.

It's a term you people use for chopped meat.

We Martians use it for charged doorknobs.

I'll explain as we go along.

But first, get a long length of wire.

Well, just don't stand there. Hurry. And remember, we start with the TV antenna.

The TV antenna, right.

Any leads?

Solid all the way. All right. The toaster should pop any moment now. You

with the wire and follow it in case something goes wrong.

This is going to work. It's a form of chain reaction.

Your scientists have just stumbled into it. With us Martians, it's mere child's

play. Hurry now. The current should be coming along any moment now.

Through me. To the doorknob. Which is ground.

Round.

Any second now.

I'm ready.

Come on, Papa.

Toaster, percolator, blender.

Here it comes.

Now she blows.

Hello. What are you two yelling about?

Where's Martin?

Oh, I don't know.

He was here. He stepped out. He wasn't here.

Who were you yelling at?

Oh, it must have been the TV.

Oh, the TV, yes.

I think you just blew a tube.

What's all that wire strung for?

Oh!

Current.

You see, I'm rewiring the house, and, well, that's why the TV set went off. I

thought I'd save a little on our electric bill.

Well, that's nice.

You know, I always get such a tingle when I come up here to see you and

Oh, I, uh, I wanted you to remember what you promised.

Promised? Yes, my brother Stan is bringing my new stereo tonight. I've

so much about you and he's dying to meet you. Now remember, you promised.

I,

uh...

Skinny nails.

You know, we thought when we were rewiring the house, we'd put in fatter

Oh, good. That's nice. That's what I've been telling my brother Stanley about.

What marvelous tenants you both are.

He really is dying to meet you.

I'll be heart sick if you break your promise and don't show up.

All right.

Fine. Right.

Whatever he says. You say. We'll be there.

Good. I knew you wouldn't let me down.

Oh, thank you.

Have you gone mad?

Popping in and out, levitating, pushing me right in front of Mrs. Brown.

I couldn't help popping in and out. You know that? The mix didn't take. The

ground round passed me. And the levitation.

Mrs. Brown. Mrs. Brown?

The charge passed me and went through to Mrs. Brown. She had her hand on the

doorknob, and instead of me being the end of the ride, I became the conductor.

You what?

Mrs. Brown?

Has my levitating powers.

They passed through me and to her.

But how?

I told you I was a conductor. She got the transfer.

You're making jokes. That's what you're doing. You're making horrible jokes.

You're the conductor. She got the transfer. And I'm off my trolley.

I would like to laugh, but it's not funny. Follow me.

Okay. Where'd you go?

Will you stop being ridiculous?

We're going to peek in Mrs. Brown's window. That's where we're going. Peek?

peek. To see how much levitating power she has and how bad it's getting.

Excuse me.

Maybe it's going to rain.

You're right.

She's got it.

How bad?

How can I tell? She keeps pointing at her hair. It keeps straightening up. So

far, she hasn't done much else.

Well, she's not panicked. She doesn't realize.

And that means she doesn't have it that bad.

Yet, it gets worse.

Yes. Take another peek and see if she has a plastic hairbrush on the table.

What are you thinking, Tim?

I have the strangest thing happening in my hair.

Is there something I can do for you, Tim?

Oh, no. I was just walking by and I was wondering what time tonight

is. Oh, after dinner, around eight -ish. That'll be fine.

I can't understand why my hair won't stay curled.

Maybe I'm nervous because Stanley is coming.

Oh, well, maybe that hair dryer will do the trick.

Did I hear her say hair dryer?

Yes. Does she have a plastic hairbrush on the dresser?

I think so.

Good. Then that's how I get back my levitating powers.

How?

Tim!

Tim, are you still there?

Yes. Because I'm going under the dryer and I won't be able to hear you if you

want to talk to me. Oh, that's no problem. I was just leaving.

See you in eighties. You and I.

Bye.

You go inside and get her to hold a plastic brush with one hand. Then you

her other hand. Then you put your left foot on the metal part of the hairdryer.

Then you take your right foot and put it up against an exposed wall socket.

I what?

Then you take your free hand and put it out the window. I'll take hold of it.

Then I'll put my foot on that metal standpipe up there, and that's how I get

power back.

I do what? I put my foot where?

It's very simple. Just think of recreating the chain.

Get her to hold the plastic brush.

Then you take her other hand. The electric socket will be the drive.

Mine! What a lovely watch.

Oh, I thought you were leaving, and I can't hear under this dryer.

I was, uh, I was just admiring your watch.

Jim, why, what's the matter with you? Do you feel all right?

I, I... feel just fine, yes.

Well, you know, I told you I was wiring my apartment.

Well, you see, I'm measuring the distance between the hairdryer and the

plug. Now, based on the principle that the August on the Santa's floor has to

have a rat -a -fortis, and also assuming that you understand the Comac, well,

then you must have a Melton -Pen -Penston -Melton.

Oh, yes.

And, uh, you wouldn't want me to overload your circuit.

Oh, yes, no.

But my brother Stanley's an audio engineer, and I'm sure he can help you.

And I don't understand why you keep doing this, and I can't hear a thing.

Hi there.

Hi, I'm Stanley.

Martin, he was standing right here.

You mean Speedy. I said hello, turned my back, and he was gone. Well, don't just

stand there, Stanley. Come on in.

I will, as soon as he lets go of my hand. Oh, Martin, this is my brother

Stanley. That's his Uncle Martin. And I'm Tim O 'Hara.

Hi, Speedy.

I'll be right in, sis. I'll get the stereo. You'll love it.

He's sure in great shape.

He gets around like Grease Lightning.

Grease Lightning.

He was right.

If I had thought of it sooner, I'd have my levitating powers back by now.

All right, so he said Grease Lightning. It's just a figure of speech. He didn't

mean anything by it. I don't care whether he meant anything about it or

said Grease Lightning, and he was right.

What's in the glass?

It's a chemical holding powder.

It can be whipped up from some of your simple home cleaning detergents. It cuts

grease.

Holds me.

Counteracts the popsy. Instead of slipping in and out like greased

which caused it, I shall be permanently held in place.

I think I've just disappeared.

You're real gone.

No more poppy, Tim. I'm here definitely, Tim.

Now we can go and visit Mrs. Brown and her brother like I promised.

Why didn't you do that before? I mean, instead of, you know, all this long

circuit stuff.

This isn't permanent, Tim. As a matter of fact, it's only temporary.

And dangerous.

Dangerous? Like putting a penny in a blown -out fuse box.

If you leave it in too long, I still have to be long -circuited.

Then I have to chain -react my levitating powers back from Mrs. Brown.

That's the main reason for going to visit with her.

Okay, let's go.

Wait a minute.

Where am I going? I don't even know what I'm supposed to do.

Ah, good point, Tim.

I took this ring from our plumbing.

It's brass.

Now, I want you to put it on the right index finger of Mrs. Brown. It will

ground her. Her levitating finger?

And I'll get Stanley to take apart the stereo set he bought.

Take it apart?

Well, it has the transistors and condensers that I need to complete my

circuit. Well, I don't understand. It'll be like shooting ducks in a barrel.

It'll be very easy, Tim. Believe me.

Oh, ducks in a barrel, pennies in a fuse box. But what am I supposed to do? Take

the ring.

Oh, on her right hand and on the right index finger and the center sheet

I don't understand why that picture keeps falling like that.

Must be bent from being stuffed in the closet all the time.

Don't say that, Stanley. I didn't bring that picture out just because you're

here tonight. It's been out all along, hasn't it, Tim?

Oh, yes, yes. It's been standing there all the time.

That's a lovely shade of fingernail polish you have, Mrs. Brown. Oh, thanks.

Would anyone like some after -dinner mints? If you would, they're right here.

Love one.

They're delicious.

Maybe Stanley would like one. Would you?

No, thank you.

I thought you would.

Tim?

Oh, won't you sit down, Martin?

Oh, well... You know, during dinner tonight, I kept dropping... dropping

and I wasn't even near them.

Um, why don't you turn on the stereo? I'd like to hear your set sounds.

Oh, hear it.

It is beautiful, isn't it? As Matt's tweeters and woofers, as well as mid

-range.

They seem quite serious.

Who?

Oh. Oh!

Oh, yes, well, you know, they're just friendly neighbors. We all are. Just one

big happy family.

Oh, Stanley, will you play the machine?

Now that you have it all hooked up, I'd love to hear it. I'll turn on the preamp

and show you how pretty it warms up.

They're really serious. I'll wire a whole house for them.

You'll wire a what?

Oh, well, you got them all wrong. That's not what it looks like.

Oh, no?

Well, it better be. That's my baby sister.

Uncle Martin, why don't you go over and watch Stanley? He has the preamp on.

I'll take Mrs. Brown in the kitchen. I have the ring.

A ring in the kitchen?

Well, yes, it's an old family ring, and I'd like you to look at it. The light's

much better in the kitchen.

Oh, yes. Oh, yes, yes.

It's a very lovely heirloom, and you know much more about these things than

do. Oh, I do? Of course you do. Now, this belonged to my grandmother.

Hmm, that's quite a machine.

I'm a hi -fi fan, you know. The kid sent you over.

I mean it.

I saw you holding hands with my baby sister. If you're really serious about

I'll wire a whole new house for you.

Um... What's this?

What'd you do that for?

It's a 787 -3101. I had it all balanced in and... Look, you want to talk about a

dowry?

Now, let's just see what it looks like on you. Oh, no, no, no, not that finger.

It's too small.

This finger. Oh, yes, well.

Oh, see, I told you. It's too small. I think it's stuck. Oh, really? Well,

Let's see what it looks like under the light.

Oh.

Oh, it's lovely.

What are you doing?

And what's this?

What are you, some kind of a nut? Why do you want to take my stereo apart?

I just put it together.

Oh, I just wondered what this was.

I don't care if it's stuck. You can keep it.

Oh, Tim.

Oh, Tim.

Oh, Stanley, look at the ring Tim just gave me.

Tim gave you? Yes, it's old world brass. It's from my grandmother's time.

He gave?

Mm -hmm. But I thought you...

He must be a lot older than he looks.

And you must be a lot younger.

Stanley, what happened to my new stereo?

Oh, I'm afraid I did this. I'll fix it right away.

Here, now you hold this.

Yes, I want to talk to you about him.

Because if you're thinking seriously... Hey, don't do that.

What was that?

Earthquake.

Earthquake? It was in the papers tonight.

Light trim is expected in this vicinity.

Can I see you alone for a minute in the kitchen?

Okay. Is everything okay?

Good as new.

And I've learned something Earthian, Tim.

Like you people, I really don't appreciate what I have until I lose it.

Well, I'm glad you're so happy, but what about Pam?

Nothing. Nothing?

Sammy's inside scrubbing her finger with soap, trying to get the ring off, and

at the same time trying to convince her to get us off her property, or at least

not be friendly with us.

What'd she say?

No.

What are you doing? Lower those things!

You forget, Tim, that getting my levitating powers back is only the first

I'm still on a temporary penny in my fuse box.

I'm existing on cleaning detergent. I still have to cure my popsy.

You're going to leave me here?

You will make apologies for me.

Oh, hi. There you are. Martin had to leave. He had a splitting headache.

Earthquake. It must have sprung the door, Jim, but let's not worry about

Well, how are you doing, Stanley?

I mean, I've really been looking forward to meeting you. Tell me all about

yourself.

All clear.

I'm ready.

You know, I really shouldn't help you.

Why? Well, after leaving me with Mrs. Brown, her brother.

Well, now, being a little bit uncomfortable socially is not the same

who levitates and runs away lives to levitate another day. Now, get going.

toaster's gonna pop at any second now.

Uh, just what would happen to you, Uncle Martin, if, uh... Don't ask.

I smell something burning.

Oh. Oh, toaster.

No, no. I think it's me.

Go on.

Come on.

Here we come.

Ready and waiting.

Hello, anybody home?

Your front door was locked, so I thought I'd try the back door.

Oh, still working on the rewiring?

Yes, we almost have it.

Done. I just came up to bring you back this ring. It really is an antique. My

brother Stanley told me it came from an old plumbing fixture.

No. Well, you know, perhaps we're rewiring the sink.

Mrs. Brown, I'm terribly sorry that I wasn't better company for your brother.

Oh, well, that's all right. Actually, it does... Residue.

Half hour.

Half hour?

Mrs. Brown, would you like to watch a little TV with me?

Now? The Late, Late, Late Show.

Turn on the TV, Tim.

I think I'll take a little walk.

But, Tim, it's one of your favorite programs.

At least you could let me sit down.