Original subtitles

Remember we talked about word family. I know you love that.

So we're going to start with words that end in A -N. You yell out a word, I'll

write it down. Let's see how many we can get. Go.

Fan. Fan. There's a good one.

Man. Man. That's another one.

Lesbian.

Words that end in A -N. Anyone. Words ending in A -N.

Lesbian. I heard pan.

Good. No.

Faith said lesbian.

All right. No big deal. Faith said lesbian.

Hold on. Good. We'll write that down. Just a word.

Not a big deal, but we'll move on. We'll get some other ones.

What is a lesbian, sir?

It's your word. How do you... All right.

If you liked another girl... I like Olivia. Am I a lesbian?

Well, if you like, like Olivia, you could be, sure.

I like, like, like Olivia.

I love Olivia.

I like Olivia, too. Am I a lesbian?

No, it doesn't work that way, Phillip.

You can never be a lesbian.

No fair. I want to be a lesbian.

Me too.

You can all be lesbians. Okay, let's just move on. Let's try words that end

-N. Prostitution.

What did you say?

Prostitution.

What is prostitution?

What is prostitution?

Let's say prostitution is when you work in the street and you get paid.

I want to do prostitution.

No. All right.

Moving on to words that end in R -E, but let me just have a second here to think

if nothing, there can't be. So shout out words that end in R -E.

Crack whore.

I'm awesome.

No, you're not, dude. Don't lie.

I'm awesome. I'm driving around.

Every time I go to this grocery store, something goes wrong.

This time, I get home, I have tuna in my bag. I don't eat tuna. So she took

someone else's groceries.

Did I pay for this tuna?

Can't you just bag my groceries properly?

Take your time.

Hot stuff.

You're late, and you interrupted a great story.

Your stories are always boring, bro. You know what's boring, bro?

Is detention, which you will be at after school.

Sorry, sir.

I can't. I'm busy. You're busy.

You're not busy, and you'll be there after school.

That's how that works. Okay?

Sir? Yes, officer.

What did you do with that tuna?

I forget what I was... I was telling a story, and now I forget it because of

Christian.

Guys, let's spread out and let's move. This is physical education, phys ed, not

stand around.

Your hands are in your pockets.

What is going on?

Laurie, come on, get up.

I'm so tired.

I can't play anymore.

Yeah, I don't know. I totally get it. It's just that we just started and you

haven't moved yet, so I don't understand why you're so tired.

Are you lazy shaming me? No, I'm not lazy shaming you, but if you and

else here, if you don't start getting active... Yeah, I'm looking at you. I'm

going to start taking away marks. How about that? Being active isn't the same

for everyone, Miss.

That's fine.

It's just I need you to have your heart rate going up, okay? I mean, let's go.

Do your best, please. What if this is my best? Then your best sucks.

Hey, am I right?

I'm so right.

Hey, we're not taking a break. Let's get going.

Okay, everybody.

Today, we are going to be talking about Niccolo.

Okay, everybody. There's a lot to get through, so... Hey! Hey!

You guys!

If you could just help me out just this one time, because I'm having a really

rough week.

It's just a lot.

Going through this, like, really weird thing.

With my godparents.

I just feel a little bit overwhelmed.

Are you okay, Miss?

Of course.

I am fine. I should not, um, everybody, I should not have broken down like that.

So, I apologize. Can we help?

No. No, really.

But thank you. But listen, now that I have you back, why don't we take a

minute to talk a little bit about Niccolo Machiavelli.

Anything you need, miss. Okay.

Everybody's looking at me.

Blow. Winds crack your cheeks.

You cataracts and hurricanes.

Rage! I am raging.

No, you dilettante. How many... times do we have to go over this the line is

blow wins and crack your cheeks rage blow and then cataracts yada yada

and so on detention oh you can't punish him for being talentless

jerry that's what the critics are for very funny let's go sorry sir occupado

occupa i don't know what you just said but you don't speak like that to a

teacher i'm fed up I'm fed up having to chase you around the school to tell you

to go to detention.

Mama likes what she's hearing.

We'll do this later. We'll do this later. We'll do this later.

We will do this now.

Now. Because I am the teacher. You are the student. Now get your ass down to

detention right this second. You don't tell me anything.

I tell you. Tell me, Jerry. Tell me how you feel about this boy. He's driving me

crazy.

You're old. So are you. You're useless.

No one respects your authority, and it's making you lose your mind, isn't it?

I'm not useless at all.

Denial. It's perfect.

You rake up leer!

I found my muse!

You, get out of here. You're through.

What? Go on, get out of here. Dink!

Go on, pack your bags. That means go to detention.

There's a new king in town.

What are you... You, Jerry.

I have no idea what's happening right now.

You are my new lair.

What's going on?

Okay. Let's do this.

Come on.

Okay. Child labor.

Um, the seal hunt.

Human trafficking, that's bad, but, like, not really bad for me personally.

Beaches, she dies at the end.

Beaches, why did she die?

Gosh, was I crying? I didn't even notice.

That's so embarrassing.

Bless your heart. It would mean a lot to me if we could just

get through the lesson today, okay?

Because I am going through a very difficult time.

Of course.

All right, you lazy fart.

Some of you have said... that you're doing your best, and I say, I don't

so. So we're all going to wear heart monitors to find out who's telling the

truth and who's lying about doing their best.

Yeah, that's right. It's a bit of a game changer.

Stuffy's on to pass them around.

Now, some of you might notice that Lori's been doing laps this whole time.

She's my little guinea pig.

I told you, this is my best. No one can hear you chuckle. Okay, kids, look up

there to the chart. See that?

That's Lori's heart rate, all right? She's doing 65 beats.

Per minute. What does that mean?

That's a great question. That means that Lori's a little liar.

I'd like to see at least 120 beats per minute, all right?

Everybody show me you've got one on. Let's see.

Nice. Can I go to the bathroom? Yeah, go ahead. Miss, I gotta go too. Yeah,

yeah, go. All right, come on. Let's talkies, more walkies. Let's move it,

I'm loving the commitment, Jerry.

This doesn't look like it.

Looks a little lost.

Do you ever see the shining?

Does he?

Know what he's doing? Isn't opening night tomorrow?

I'm not worried.

He's a natural.

It's not real.

That's so cool.

I am King Lear!

It's not real.

Why is that so cool? I thought those were real.

So into the role of Lear, it's like he's actually demented.

All right, who's the first one? Me?

Let's start with Cordelia.

She's Cordelia?

And yet not so, since I am sure my love's more richer than my tongue.

What?

I didn't even know what she said there. She's not speaking English.

It's Shakespeare, Terry. Just read what's on the page. I've been meaning to

to you about that. Like, I think I'm just going to take a look at some of

and play around with the words a bit.

Okay, well, Shakespeare is sort of a stickler for words, so if you could

I'll even make it funnier.

Fill out some comedy. He's changing the words of Shakespeare.

Well, it'll be more of an adaptation.

Look at him. He is Lear.

Go. It's you.

And yet not so, since I am sure my love's more richer than my tongue.

Watch. Watch.

What's her name again? Your daughter's name is Cordelia.

Cordelia. Hey, Cordy, what's going on, girl?

Didn't see you at the mall last week.

Right? A good director has to trust her actors.

Make it relevant.

So how are you doing? Great, great, thanks, yeah. Everything okay?

Everything is the best, yes.

Thank you. Let's cut to the chase, shall we?

Are you breaking down in class?

Oh,

my goodness.

Did you know?

Oh, you are so sweet. No, I'm totally fine.

It's just a trick. I realize that when you lose the kids, you lose the room.

Best way to get them back.

is by crying and it keeps working so i keep doing it so you can just like

niagara falls space just on command i have my sad stuff to get me where i'm

going if i need to call on it but yeah pretty much yeah don't say yeah like

what well you know like sarah mclaughlin Or family specials at restaurants. Not

everybody has a family.

Or I think of somebody who has one very small hand.

Okay. My Uncle Tommy. He was a psychopath.

Class A.

Italian people.

A public park.

Anything to do with, like, Will Smith.

You know, whatever I need. I just bring it up, and then it starts coming down.

Yeah. Great.

I know. And I know that it's wrong.

I am not intimidating like you. I wasn't born with that, you know, that you were

born with. And no offense, but you have no idea what it's like when no one

respects your authority.

No, I don't.

I don't know what that's like. But it must be hard.

You imagine right.

Which is why, as your superior, I must put my professional foot down and insist

that you...

Ma 'am, stop breaking down in your classroom.

Really? Yeah.

Stop. Yeah. Stop crying in the classroom.

Sorry, because I thought you were my friend, and now you're yelling at me in

your office. This is not what I thought was going to happen.

Oh, my gosh.

Nisha, I'm genuinely sorry.

Oh, thank you.

I didn't... See?

Right? Okay.

All right, you guys. See what happens when you motivate yourselves? This is

fantastic. And two of you, Hudson and Sophie, went above and beyond.

So whatever you guys are doing, keep it up. Okay? Round of applause for Hudson

and Sophie.

What, what? They are an example to everybody else.

Eyes on them. Looks like...

Those little monitors have motivated you guys to exercise.

You mean force us to exercise.

That's my job, Lori, okay? My job.

All right, go get changed.

Ready, Jerry?

Um, actually, I'm really nervous. There's a lot more people there than I

thought. I'm not sure I thought this through.

That's okay. It's normal to be nervous.

Yeah, okay. Look at me.

I'm terrified.

Just use that nervous energy.

Use it.

Thanks.

I shall, my liege.

Oh, for the love of God.

Ridiculous. I am King Lear.

Speak to many, but listen only to me.

A horse, a horse, a kingdom for my horse.

Or something like that.

It's not even here.

To see or not to see?

When you, you are a rose.

My son.

My son.

Brother! Brother!

Hey, Trudy.

Tell me what you think of these, please. I'll feed back.

I think they're probably going to be too thick for the shredder, but I bet

they'd burn real good.

Come on, Judy, be serious.

I need to pick one of these, the one that best captures my range as an actor.

photo could ever capture what you're capable of.

Jealousy. I've heard about that in the biz. It's rampant.

Can't get to me. Actually, you weren't as bad as I thought you were going to

Thank you. Was that so hard to say, Trudy? I thought that you were going to

soul -crushingly horrible.

But you were actually just really, really bad.

And I think you have better odds of giving birth to a litter of kittens than

do of making it as a professional actor. The critics will attack you. They say,

ignore them with all your might. That's what I will do.

Because I am a performer.

It might keep me humble, so thank you.

I've only been at this a short time. I already have a hit play.

And I have a commercial audition coming up, so I'm about to blow up. I hope so.

And good luck with your audition.

And you don't need luck when you have talent.

Okay, those numbers are more like it. Hudson and Sophie, your numbers are

through the roof. Good job. Whatever you're doing, don't stop.

Keep it up. Don't go down.

Yeah, yeah. Are you kidding me? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 190.

Go up. Oh, my God. Go up. Do I see 200?

Oh, my God. Do 200. Do 200.

Do, do, do, do.

200. Yes.

200. Oh, my God. You did it. 200.

Holy smokes.

Oh, my God.

Okay, you dropped off at 160, 130. That's okay.

You know what? Take a break. Take a breather.

Woo. Oh.

That's amazing. That's wild because they were like.

At a climax that... Seriously, does anybody know

where Hudson and Sophie went to? The bathroom.

Like usual.

No.

But not to get together.

Yeah, sure.

All right, everyone, let's get started. We have a lot to get to.

Shall we?

Robert, why don't you let me handle this? I've been a principal a little bit

longer than you. That won't be necessary, Lisa, but thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen, please.

Your attention, please.

Okay.

All right?

Mm -hmm. Yeah?

The tears all go deep, deep.

Let's begin.

First item of business?

Hey.

I'm ready.

I was already waiting like 45 minutes past my time. Yeah, we're sorry about

that. We had a little problem earlier. Are you ready to do this? Yeah.

Do you want a plate?

And just remind me what that is. I'm a theater background.

Say your name and your agency. Perfect.

Jerry Duncan, self...

Represented. Right now. That could change after. Okay. Quick question about

couple. Are they happily married? Are they having trouble? They're very happy.

And how long have they been married? Let's say two years.

And I have memorized.

Wow. Yeah. That's great.

Good morning.

Sorry, did you just say good morning?

Yeah, I thought it had some humor to it because they're happy, right? Sure.

Yeah, that is fun. The line is good morning.

Try one like that. Okay.

Not as funny.

We're just going to try it as it's written.

Good morning.

Not directly into the camera. Just us. We're your audience.

We're just... The camera's not here. Okay. Theater, I would... Theater's...

That's your audience.

Just so I'm clear, is he already with her? Like, where is he? Is he in the

house? He comes into the kitchen. Right. She's sitting there. She's the face of

our product. He's made a pot of coffee. Yeah. He's got drafts. He comes down,

and he says, good morning.

Have you already cast her?

She is cast.

Okay, well, hopefully we don't look like siblings or something.

She's the one.

Good morning.

Can I do that again? I was looking at the coffee.

Right. Not her.

Good morning.

One more.

Okay. Good morning.

That was great. Yep, that's the one. Thank you so much for coming in. Okay,

thank you.

Great to meet all of you. Yeah, how do you find out? Hey, good.

How do you find out?

Do you call?

You'll know.

Yep. All right, good luck.

Good morning. Thanks. I think we have more people waiting outside. Good

range right change.

It is a night shot