Original subtitles

Thank you. That was very good, Samira.

Who's next?

What are you doing here, Mr. Duncan?

Miss Johnson's away today, Trudy, so I said I would fill in for her.

Okay, so you're going to do a scene from King Lear. Is that what she was going

to do? No.

Boring. I'm going to modernize it, not doing something from the 1920s, Judy.

Hey, hey, hey.

I know I'm changing it. Don't worry.

It's very simple. Follow my lead. Come over here. This will get us in the

competition. You're going to love this. You're going to love this.

Don't give me attitude right now. I do not need it, Amanda Susan.

And you're going to go right there. Line up.

Okay? Just follow my lead.

Follow my lead.

Okay?

Okay, music.

What are you doing, Amanda Susan?

I'm not doing this. Can't you just dance for two minutes?

It's stupid.

Then sit down.

Make me.

You're ruining the song. You're ruining the song.

I'll go first.

You're supposed to

dance. We were supposed to do King Lear.

What is that?

Ballet. The Spice Girls?

Sit down. But I love dance. No, too bad.

I assumed you'd be able to dance. Why?

Because you're black.

What is that supposed to mean? It's a compliment.

Go.

No. Bye.

Okay,

that's enough, Mr. Duncan.

Bingo's plan, didn't it?

Why can't I finish the song? This is a talent show.

And that was... Do you want to see tap dancing?

Really? How about Irish hip -hop?

Irish hip -hop?

Can you give yourself a lap, Dan?

Give myself a lap?

Okay.

I'm regretting this already.

Am I in?

No. You're disgusting.

I'm awesome.

No, you're not, dude. Don't lie. I'm awesome. I'm driving around in my mom's

ride. I'm awesome. A quarter of my life gone by.

I'm awesome.

You want me to coach fencing?

I didn't even know we had a fencing team. First year.

Exciting, isn't it?

Is that in your shirt? No, it's not exciting.

How am I supposed to coach something I know nothing about?

I'm sure you'll figure it out, Jerry.

Fencing's not a sport. I don't know anyone that fences. Nobody fences

even in Russia.

Ricky's a fencer. I'm a fencer.

No, you're not.

Yes, I am.

First I crushed a tournament, then I crushed the Olympics.

The Olympics.

That is a great attitude.

I'm going to let you two work this out.

All right. Yes, I'm coaching fencing.

See you at the trial.

Not if I see you first.

Doesn't make sense. You will see me first.

That's right. I will. Because I'll be the first one in the gym. That's why

you'll see me first.

What? What?

Whatever. Okay. Bye.

Just grow a pair, will ya?

What?

How long have you had the hocks for him?

Just ask him out already.

It's just he's... Hey, Paul!

I think Bobby has a question for you. What are you doing?

Hey. Bobby, what's up?

Hey, Paul.

What's going on?

As you know, or maybe... Well, have I told you? Told me what?

I'm single.

Okay. And you're single too, right?

Yeah, my ex -wife kind of broke my heart real bad. Yeah, that's great. So we're

both single.

While we are young. Would you like to have dinner with me?

You know what? This isn't the best time for me to be going out for meals, but

thanks.

Right, but... We could, um, you know what?

We could stay in. You could come to my place for dinner.

Free of charge?

Free of charge.

Of course. Of course, free of charge. I don't have to bring anything. No, just

you. Just come as you are.

Wow.

Perfect.

I'll see you at six. Okay. Six o 'clock.

What are you doing?

I'm doing the big balls dance. I grew a pair.

Yeah? Well, if you ever want to have sex again, you have to stop doing that.

Okay.

What a waste of gym time.

All right.

Hey, Ricky.

Hey, Coach.

Nice of you to show up.

You be nice, Ricky, because I decide who makes the team.

Where is everybody?

You're looking at them. There's no one else here for the trial.

Looks like I'm the team.

Okay, first of all, a team has more than one person.

So you're not the team. You're just a kid with a boring hobby. By the way,

Gulka asked me to give you the schedule.

Practice time, seven o 'clock.

She did this on purpose. Twice, twice a week. Are you kidding me?

Yo, we're going to miss one of those, I'll tell you right now.

Ricky, there's got to be another sport that you like.

Nope. I'm a fencer.

A fencer. Great.

Should we get started?

Sure. Why don't you, uh, why don't you run some laps or something? Laps?

You might want to Google fencing.

Well, do whatever you do when you practice fencing. Great coaching.

I'll be straight up thank you when I make the Olympics.

When you get started, I'm going to sit over here doing nothing, because that's

what a fencing coach does.

And I've got to go to bed early tonight because of this.

Lazy ass.

You know, I'm really glad we're doing this, Paul. Oh, me too, man.

Nothing like a warm meal.

You know, the timing's never been right, but... We're finished with that? Oh.

You can have that, too.

Someone enjoys my cooking.

I love it.

You know, don't forget to save room for dessert.

Dessert? I mean, not literally dessert, but like... So no dessert?

Uh -huh.

I didn't want to outstay my welcome. Maybe I should just take off.

Um, or you could stay the night.

Really? Yeah.

You mean breakfast in the morning?

Yeah, we could have breakfast in the morning.

I'm in.

Great. Me too.

What?

Did you hit those lights?

You know, this isn't really what I meant when I said spend the night.

Hey, you got any room in there under the covers for me?

On guard.

Great job, Ricky. You're a natural.

My dummy needs a break.

Get up.

Nope, I don't get up till 8 o 'clock.

Fencers, move, and this is not going to make me any better.

Just let me sleep.

Fine.

All right.

Stop joking around. I need to practice.

Relax. Just having fun.

How's that?

Let's go.

Let's see what you got, girl.

Ah, didn't expect that, did you?

Sir, let go.

You're not allowed to do that. Learn how to coach.

Ah, I'll learn how to coach you in a real sport that's not at 7 a .m. Point,

point, point, point.

I win.

You're ruining this.

Okay,

jokesters.

Which one of you was it?

What are you talking about, Robert?

What am I talking about? My lunch was stolen for the third time this week.

Now, I like pranks as much as the next guy, but I'm also kind of peckish, so I

wouldn't mind having my lunch back.

Whoever took it, give it back.

I don't think anyone here would do anything like that. Hey, are you sure

you brought your lunch today?

Am I sure?

Yeah. Well, if you're asking whether I'm sure, I woke up this morning, as I

always do, took a plump, juicy tomato, sliced it in perfect slices, put those

slices in between two slices of white bread, put that in a vacuum -sealed bag,

labeled it Robert, and put it on the back of the second shelf of the fridge

I do every single day that I work here, yeah, pretty sure.

This is not nice.

Whoever has the lunch, please return.

Thank you, Mr. Malick. That's very nice of you. Of course. You're welcome.

Too nice.

I'll be watching you.

In fact, I'll be watching all of you.

Look, I'm sorry you quit fencing, but maybe you could just pop into Principal

Mason's office and tell her that it's officially over.

Olympians never quit.

Okay, then I'm going to cut you from the fencing team because you walked out on

practice. You're mocking my sport.

It's not a sport, Ricky. Let's be honest.

You don't get it. I was born to fence.

I tried other sports.

I was an outsider.

You don't know what that feels like. I do know what that feels like, Ricky.

Yeah, right.

I was at a nightclub once and said no jeans.

Only person with jeans in the whole nightclub.

They were looking at me, pointing like that, talking about my jeans.

I felt like such an outsider. I just left, so I know what it's like to feel

way. That's really not the same thing.

It's pretty close, but it doesn't matter. What matters is we're going to

to that tournament.

Thank you. You're welcome.

And I'm not wearing jeans.

Hey, didn't you fit over my hat last night?

Um, no one?

That's very funny. No, Mr.

D himself.

Cherry? Ugh, gross.

Oh, come on.

Dwyer. Ooh.

Did you?

No. He stayed on the couch.

Yikes. Kate, you know what? We are taking things slowly.

He'd had a very big meal. He was very tired. It was a school night. Obviously,

we're not going to... So, obviously, you struck out. Kate, if I struck out,

would he be having dinner at my place again tonight?

That depends.

The ex -Mrs. Dwyer is getting everything in the divorce.

So maybe he's more interested in a hot meal than he is in your warm bod.

Okay, trust me. He's interested in both. And by the time I'm done with him, he

is going to be so into me, he won't know how to get out.

Well, then maybe you should have a Sherpa standing by.

Maybe I will.

A little Sherpa.

So what is a Sherpa?

Figured as much.

What's going on?

Are you kidding me?

This is unacceptable.

What's wrong?

Just wait here.

Tommy Chunks, you got your puke bag?

Frank, can I talk to you for a second, please?

Sure thing, pal.

Hey. What's up?

We need to switch buses.

What? My team won't fit in that bus. You only got one kid. Why would we switch?

Wow, because I'm not taking Ricky on the short bus. You of all people should

know this.

Me of all people?

Shame on you, Frank.

Unbelievable.

Boys, you're on the wrong bus. Everybody off, please.

You're on the other bus.

Thank you.

What are you doing? The right thing.

Come on, Ricky.

Mixed up the buses.

Don't even start with me. Don't even start.

Okay.

There it is.

Gone.

You must think you're pretty funny, do you, Mr. Malick?

I have my moment. I know it with you just admit it.

I don't even care.

I just want to hear the words come out of your mouth. Just say it.

I would never eat your bland poison.

Oh, really?

We'll have to do that the hard way.

Okay, little buddy.

Just you and me. You're the only one I can trust.

Remember the time we caught that pesky kitty messing with our tomatoes?

What do you say we make it two for two?

eyes i see a paradise this world that i found is too good to be

true standing here beside you want so much to give you this love

in my heart that i'm feeling for you let's say we're crazy

No,

no, that's my part.

Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, that's my part.

Forget it. Why did you do that?

Because it's my turn. It's a duet. You can't do both parts. Well, you're not

strong enough for your part.

Wow. Help yourself to the buffet.

Everything looks so good. Oh, thanks, Paul.

I don't even know where to start.

I think I do. Yeah.

Yeah. This is Brie? Yeah. I promised myself I wouldn't eat cheese for a

but I think I'll make an exception.

Yeah, you will.

Mm -hmm. Is this pastrami? Yeah. You got it.

You can resist, right?

Thanks. You're welcome.

Paul, are you... Hmm?

Are you coming back or are you... Wheel of Fortune.

Okay, this guy knows what he's doing. We'll be on the road in no time. Good

news. We're good to go?

Yep, they're sending out the bus in a couple of hours. A couple hours?

If I'm late, I'll be disqualified.

You will not be disqualified. I will not let you be late.

Okay?

Oh, great.

You two need a lift. We can probably squeeze you in. Yes, please.

No, we don't. Come on, Jerry. Don't be ridiculous.

But, sir.

I told you. We're not going with you. I've already gone through this. Goodbye.

Jerry, it's just a smaller bus.

Goodbye, Frank.

Get out of here.

So you'd rather walk. Is that what you're saying? Maybe.

Why do you not go with Frank?

Just do yourself.

Let's go.

I'm not putting you on that bus.

How far is this to the main?

I'd say a couple of miles. A couple of miles. Come on. We're going to walk. Are

you kidding me? Oh, don't be so lazy. You're a fencer.

Okay? All right.

Okay? We got to hurry.

Okay? It just goes like that. Just sits on you like that. Arms out. Okay. Hang

me. Turn around.

Okay? And here we go.

Let's do this. It's only a couple miles.

Okay? Here we go.

I think she got all that on. Let's do this.

All right. Faster, faster, faster.

Strengthen those fencing legs.

What? Call for Xavier Spencer, Ricky Devere. Report to Area 5 or risk

disqualification. We're here. We're just getting changed. Ricky Devere, Xavier

Academy, ready to fight.

Over there, please. Right there?

Letting that girl? No problem.

Hey. What are you doing?

I know you don't believe in yourself right now. Yes, I do.

No, you don't. You don't, but you should. You belong here just as much as

other weird kids and their fake swords.

So you go out there and you shine.

Thank you.

Yeah, get in here.

All right, we don't have a lot of time, so let's ease up on that.

All right.

Okay. All right. You are going to do so well.

Okay, here we go.

Xavier Academy in the house.

En garde.

Here we go.

Come on, Ricky.

En garde. Here we go.

Ali. Come on, Ricky Olympics.

Okay, okay, okay. Let's drag this out.

Oh, two, one.

Got to get this one. Oh,

two, one.

Come on, Ricky. Believe in yourself.

Ali. What?

What? What? She allowed to do that?

Ali.

Oh, two, one.

Match is 5 -0. Come back.

Salute. Fini.

We came, we saw, we left early.

Wow. We looked good.

But we didn't.

We did nothing.

That was fast.

That was it. We're done.

Long trip, long trip.

Hey. Hey. Where to?

I'm going to go see Dwyer.

That his?

Yeah, he left it at my house last night.

Oh, his belt came off.

Hallelujah.

Details, please. Well, he ate so much that he had to undo his pants to make

for dessert.

That's not a euphemism, is it?

No. No, it's not.

I just want to drop this off at his desk, call it a day. No, because I'm not

human buffet, right?

Is that coleslaw?

Is it still?

What do I smell like right now?

Prosciutto. Exactly.

And Brie, you smell delicious, actually. Oh, thanks. You think?

Oh, my God.

Is he living down here?

How you doing, Bobby?

Hi. We're out again for tonight.

Gonna work up a real appetite.

Congratulations. You're officially a human soup kitchen.

You missed practice this morning.

Practice? You lost.

Season's over.

I'm not quitting. I have the Olympics coming up.

Okay. I have to say this.

I think you mean Special Olympics.

Hey, get some talent.

Then you can split hairs.

See you tomorrow at 7.

Oh, my God.

Now I can't even get your DNA all over me.

Watercraft. Look what he did.