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Before we get started, I have a few things I need to give you. Shut your
Ready? Ta -da!
Look at that.
I'm Kira.
That was cool.
This? Vince?
Wow. Huh?
Look at that, Vince.
What is it?
A paperweight? A paperweight. Oh, silly me.
Come get this, please.
I don't write on two -foot -by -three -foot paper either, just so you know.
Yeah.
I had to bring that to and from my house.
Sir, what are those?
These are the gifts you gave me last year that I have no use for, so I'm
them back.
So, to make this easier, at the end of this year, I have registered at the
Golfatorium.
Very simple.
Go home.
Show the brochure to your parents. Go online.
Look up my name.
Buy a gift. Nice and easy.
This driver is $500.
Start saving. For things like that, for the driver, two families can join up.
Sir, isn't it the thought that counts?
It's the gift that counts. That's all that counts is the gift. How much I like
you, a lot of it is based on that gift at the end of the year.
A lot of teachers won't tell you that.
But it's the truth. You get me that driver.
You watch your mark.
I'm awesome.
No, you're not, dude. Don't lie.
I'm awesome. I'm driving around in my mom's ride. I'm awesome. A quarter of my
life gone by.
I'm awesome.
Any idea?
What about Duncan?
What about me?
Just give it a second, Duncan. Yeah, but you just said my name. Why? Throws a
wrench in things that doesn't work. A wrench in... Are you sick?
No. You could cover some of the classes.
Bobby, you look sick. And if you're sick, you should really tell people.
He could cover a class in his spare. That works. Yeah.
Duncan, I need you to cover one of Jeff's phys ed classes in your spare the
couple of weeks. Shut up.
Shut up.
Shut up.
Okay.
The boss. I got it. The boss. Teach for Zed.
I am. Oh, my. Yeah, we didn't expect this, so I will cover Jeff's other class
my spare, and he'll be back in a couple weeks. It's like an audition.
No, it's nothing. No, it's nothing like an audition.
Jerry does a good job.
Oh, my God.
Jerry teaches full -time phys ed.
Wow. Jerry, you have a phys ed degree, okay, and it works with your schedule.
That's the only reason why Callahan asked you to do this. That's it. Only
reason.
Oh, I have.
Sir?
There you are.
Just a reminder that that reporter from National Teacher Society magazine is
coming to do that profile on me. I don't recall you telling me anything about
that. Why are they interviewing you?
Trudy, I'm not going to let you get to me.
Okay?
Sir, I told you this.
Cover story, good exposure for the school. Remember?
You know what? You're right.
With enrollment down, this could be good publicity.
Well done, Robert.
Thank you, sir.
You know, Trudy, I'm thinking of asking a few members of the staff to join me in
the cover photo.
Ooh, exciting.
You mean that?
Nope.
Knock,
knock, knock. Hi, everyone. Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, just kind of
read quietly amongst yourselves there.
I got this new student, Jake, who's got ADD, and I know you're so good at
handling it. I was wondering if you could talk to him after school.
Tough disease to live with. I know what that's like.
It's not really a disease, but... Really?
Well, you don't live with it.
You know what it's like to have...
One thought in your head and then five other thoughts enter at the same time?
Have you ever had that happen? No, I just mean it's a disorder, not a
Okay. What are you thinking about right now, Mr. Hunt?
Jake. One thing.
I have five things in my head. Why does the room smell like paint?
Do I have to pick out my dry cleaning today or is that tomorrow?
By the way, that's not the right chapter.
Do you have all those things in your head at once? That list?
I just checked them all off.
So... What?
Would you see Jake after school? Yes. Okay.
About? ADD. That kid. Yeah, I know. See?
Locked in.
Tell him to come see me, though. Thank you.
Wow.
Uh, Trudy, can I talk to you for a second?
Um, I was wondering if, on the day that the reporter comes, if you could, um,
you know, leave your gal pals at home.
Excuse me?
I wouldn't mind if you could cover yourself up when the reporter's here, so
maybe if you could hide your shirt sherpas, your protrudies, your blouse
beagles.
Trudy, your breasts.
Hide your breasts.
All right, as you're aware, Mr. Lemire's away for a few weeks. I will be
covering this class in his absence, okay?
Sir, can you teach Jim?
My degree is in physical education, which is what we call it.
Kinesiology. Because that's what I studied in university.
We learn anatomy.
We learn physiology.
We take the same courses as doctors.
They cure people.
We prevent you from getting injured and sick.
They just make a lot more money.
Do we still get to play floor hockey? Yes, we get to play floor hockey and
of fun things. But first, we have to do some fitness testing. I need to see what
kind of shape you're in. I don't care in phys ed how smart you are. Because if
you're a dead smart person, who cares?
You need to stay healthy. So we're going to do some testing. We're going to do
three things today. We're going to do sit and reach to test your flexibility.
We're going to do the beef test, one of my favorites, and the flexed arm hang,
which I will demonstrate.
Lucy's going to record the times.
All right, what's going to happen is this.
You're going to stand on the chair to get yourself to this level. Once you
yourself to eye level, we pull the chair away.
Okay, Lucy, when I say, all right, pull the chair away. Now that's eye level.
That's not eye level.
That's not eye level. Right here. And you hold it. And you fight it. And you
fight it. You fight it like a mother. You fight it. You fight the pain.
there's pain right now. Like a lot of pain.
Fight the pain. And then, how long was that? How long? Who timed it? Who timed
it? No one timed it.
Gotta time it. I'll time it. Okay? I will be timing yours. Write down 60
seconds. I think that's how long that was.
We'll go with that.
Okay? Let's see how we do. Let's go. Who's first on the list?
Cameron. Come on up, Cameron.
Let's get the stopwatch ready. You will pull yourself up.
Once you are at eye level, I will pull the chair away and we'll see how long
do. Stay up there as long as you can.
Cameron, I need you to fight the pain you feel in your arms. You need to push
yourselves. Ready?
Go.
Okay, I didn't... Okay, 0 .2 seconds.
Should I round it up to one second?
No, we don't round up .2. You round .2 down, which I'm not going to do. All
right, Tanya, come on up.
Listen, listen.
Don't get discouraged.
We're going to keep this positive.
You will be my project while I'm here. We will fix it.
All right.
Let's do better than .2 seconds.
Come on, Thomas.
We don't need butter sandwiches. Come on. That's what EpiPens are for.
Jerry.
Some of the kids came up to me and told me they didn't have any fun in gym class
today. Oh, it's... Are you kidding me? It was a lot.
Ask Mark Moore if he had fun. Look at those fitness results.
Okay, do you think it's appropriate to post the fitness results of these young
kids? They're like 11. Are you kidding me? My math teacher posted my marks in
the school. The whole school saw my 48 % average. Did I get upset?
No, I used it to motivate myself and get good at math. Actually, ask me 11 times
any two -digit number.
I'm not playing this game. No, watch how fast I can do this. 11 times 13.
143. 11 times 12.
132. 11 times 28.
I can't do that one.
There's a rule. This is humiliating. Oh my gosh, not humiliating. Cameron Andreu
needs to see this and motivate himself.
This is how we teach them. All right, he needs to rise to the occasion. Rise up,
rise up, all rise and show your power.
Parachute club, my God.
We have different philosophies, Jerry. Yes, we do. This is supposed to be fun,
Jerry. I will have more fun. I'll have lots of fun. That's all I'm asking.
we'll have a...
And we'll get in shape. It'll be fun and get in shape.
And you'll go easy on them. Yeah, go easy on them. Thank you.
And I left a memo up here about peanut butter in the school.
Jeez, these kids.
You could die from eating peanut butter. Who would do that?
Right.
Oh, peanut butter.
Gosh.
I know.
Hi, Mr. Malik.
There you are.
I just wanted to let you know that a reporter is coming tomorrow to the
to do a story on me. They'll be taking pictures, so can you please make sure
school is extra clean?
Why you always come to me with this?
I always keep the school clean?
When I not have the school clean?
This school... Impeccable!
Calm down.
I'm your vice principal. I could fire you.
You want to fire Malik?
Go ahead.
Fire Malik. Put your jacket back on. I don't want to fire you.
Okay? It was just a note. A reporter's coming tomorrow to do a story on me.
They're going to take some pictures of me. So please just make sure the school
is clean. That's it. You don't need to do that.
I understand.
Hey, so how'd your meeting with Jake go yesterday?
Good. It was good. He's good. He's coming along, I think. Lying to my face.
You didn't meet with him at all.
He showed up and you weren't there, Jerry. You're supposed to meet with him
about the ADD.
I have ADD. That's the stuff that happens. When you put somebody in
told his parents you would have met with him by now, okay?
They'll understand.
Would you meet with him tomorrow, please? I will meet with him tomorrow. I
make a note. I have less things in my head. Okay. Oh, one more thing.
Where'd you get that belt?
I'm gonna go.
I'll be there.
So apparently I'm not a fun gym teacher. Physical education teacher.
Gym teacher, Stefan.
Because what I was teaching yesterday was physical education.
But apparently you don't care how or why your body moves the way it does.
You just want to have fun.
So we'll have fun, and I'll teach gym.
Today, we'll play floor hockey, and we will have fun. And I will play, and I
will show you how it's done. So grab a stick, please. Split yourselves up. Two
teams, hurry up. Just grab any stick. Don't have to spend all day looking for
the best one.
No, no, no. Cameron and you three, that's not fair. Even if I play with
team, guys, I can't work miracles with this group.
Old school. Put your sticks in the middle. I will throw them up.
This is how it's done. Spread out.
Once you see a stick, grab it. That is the team you are on.
I don't want to hear anybody complaining.
Sir, all the stuff... Stefan, if you keep talking, I'm going to lose count.
Sir, the sticks are the same.
What? They're the same color.
Oh, yeah, that doesn't work.
All right, grab a stick then, but just do it evenly this time. Let's mix it up
little bit. Even teams, all right?
Just did the same thing. You did the same thing. You went... Lucy, what are
doing? I'm getting ready.
For what, a sword fight?
Oh, gosh.
Why don't you have a stick?
I forgot to go get it.
Oh, you forgot to go get it four seconds ago.
All right, well, you guys are lucky I'm on your team because I'm the best
player, so... Although, again, guys, we've got to balance the teams out, all
right? You've got to go on that side, Alex, okay?
All right, these are fair.
Mr. Leon.
Hmm? Good news.
I'm giving you the rest of the day off.
Why? You haven't taken a sick day in 16 years.
Who knows, a little break might do you some good. I've been collecting my sick
days so I can retire early.
Mr. Leong, you can't carry over sick days.
That no longer exists.
I've been coming in sick for no reason.
Afraid so.
Get out of here. Take today as a sick day.
Why don't you want me here?
I don't not want you here.
So then you want me here.
Well, I can't say that, but... So then I won't be here or not.
I want you to be here.
Then I won't be here.
Thank you.
Stop something, Anthony.
9 -6.
All right, guys, one more goal, we win.
No, it's up to 15.
You said it was up to 10. We change it to 15. Pay attention. Give me the ball.
Give me the ball, Anthony.
No, Cameron, give me the ball. Cameron, Cameron.
That's why I asked for the ball.
Let's go. Hurry up. Absolutely.
Game.
Get in the way. Get in the way. Where'd the ball go?
Find the ball.
Where's the ball?
Thunder him. Thunder him. Thunder him. Thunder him. Get up. There we go.
I got it. Ah!
Yeah!
Get up, Alex. Come on.
Alex.
Come on, Alex.
Alex.
Why'd you give him a suicide pass?
Alex? Hey, buddy. You there? You know you ran into me, right? I was just
standing my ground there. All right, 9 -8. Let's keep playing.
He's out.
Can't keep playing. The game's over. We win.
Why do you win? Because you lost the player, so we win.
Hey, did you see my goal?
Don't tell me you blacked out before that.
Okay, so tell me what happened, Mr. Duncan.
All right, well, Alex's team was winning, 9 -8.
Game goes to 15.
It was originally 10, sir, but Mr. D kept changing it. I kept changing it
because we had more time, Alex, so I wanted to give us more time to play.
Just tell me how he got hurt. Mr. Duncan body -shocked me.
Oh, here we go.
First of all, you were upset I had seven goals. I don't think you had any at
that point, and it was in your head. I was in your kitchen, so you weren't
focused. You were running around like a loose cannon, careless. Mr. Duncan!
Stefan gave him a suicide pass that I went to intercept. He ran into me. So
where Stefan is what I ask. Who gives a suicide pass? That's who to blame.
Stefan should be... Okay, wait, Alex. How are you feeling?
Better, sir. I don't remember a few things, but I feel better.
Remember my fifth goal? Remember this one? The toe drag? Through your legs?
Right up in your face?
Bet you remember that.
Okay, okay, Alex. Why don't you wait outside? Your parents are on their way.
Okay. See you, buddy.
Good job, buddy.
He's fine.
Jerry, I don't think it's such a good idea you're actually playing with the
kids. No, no, you let them see what they have the potential to be like. You give
them a demonstration.
Okay, look, you've got a lot on your plate. I'm bringing in a sub for the
few weeks. No, no, no, I'm fine. Let me finish teaching. No, I'm fine with the
extra course. I don't need a sub. I can handle an extra course.
My decision is final.
Okay, but that wasn't an audition to teach phys ed. Bobby said that. She made
very clear when I started doing this class.
Not an audition.
Bye -bye.
Sir, kids have concussions all the time in phys ed. I've had like seven in my
life. Do I look any different? No, I'm fine. You recover.
How do you take a path like this?
Who does that? Who walks around like this when a match looks coming at you?
Hey, sir.
I heard you labeled some grade five kid in floor hockey today.
You know what, Jimmy?
He ran into me.
Okay? Because if I wanted to label him, I would have labeled him in the next
room. Yeah, I bet.
Must have weighed, like, what, 85 pounds?
I heard he has a concussion. He doesn't have a concussion, Maya. Maybe you
should pick on people your own size.
Can everybody stand up and please move the desks? Everybody stand up and slide
the desks.
Yeah, there we go.
You're all my size, so who wants to see if they can knock me over?
Are you serious?
Sure. Sir, this is ridiculous.
You're crazy.
You ask a lot of questions, Maya. Why don't you go first so you can just stand
there and run at me and see if you can knock me over?
What?
No.
I didn't think so.
I'll go first, sir.
Ha -ha, Leonard.
Crazy Leonard.
Ha -ha, you.
All right, back to work.
Oh, is Leonard being a silly guy?
And that brings us back to the main entrance, where I come to greet the
almost every morning.
Is this one of your staff?
Uh, yes. This is Trudy. She, like... And this would be... A homeless man, I
presume.
Mr. Malik, I make sure school is clean.
Oh, my God, what are you doing?
It was my day off.
So you decided to come back to the school on your day off dressed like the
of pop?
Who?
It's ridiculous.
Mr. Dwyer, thank God, would you... That's not Mr. Dwyer.
That's an honest mistake. It could happen to anyone.
If you're a racist.
Maybe you could leave that part out.
Hey, quick picture.
I don't even know if we need... Oh, yeah, that's it.
Looks great.
Watch this.
There you are, Cameron.
All right.
You're early. Getting ready.
Stretching. Good to see.
So we're going to beat that score.
Awesome. I was practicing at home, so, you know, getting ready.
Perfect. All right. So I want you to get up there.
Okay. I want you to fight the pain you're feeling, and I need you to stay
there longer than .2 seconds.
Okay? We're going to believe in ourself. We're going to be confident.
We're going to get you in better shape.
That's what we're going to do. It starts today.
Okay? Okay. You got your stopwatch ready? I got my stopwatch ready.
All right, we're going to beat 0 .2 seconds, right?
Yeah. I'm going to pull the chair, you pull yourself up, and I know you're
to do well.
And you believe that. And you don't quit.
And you don't come down early. And you fight it. There's a little bit of pain,
so what? You fight the pain.
Do you understand me, Cameron?
All right. Ready?
I'm excited to see this.
Here we go. Ready?
And... Go!
Pull the chair. Okay, didn't...
Point three. Point three seconds.
Awesome. Yes.
Point three.
Hey, that's a 33 % improvement, right?
So there you go. All that practice paid off. Good for you. You know, I can stand
on one leg for a really long time, sir.
Say that again?
I can stand on one leg for a really long time.
You want to see?
Why wouldn't I want to see that?
Wow. Look at that.
Look at that. Oh, well, now you're kind of cheating. You're holding on there, so
that's... Not really.
Look at that.
Pelican. See you, sir.
See you later, Cameron.
Sorry I'm late, Jake. Oh, gosh, crazy day.
And I apologize for forgetting to meet with you the other day. I know Mr. Hunt
wanted you to speak to me because you have ADD, I have ADD, so I'm here.
It's fine. I understand that you're busy.
We're all busy, but I need to make more time for students. And this is an
example of someone that's living with ADD, something I live with every day,
I want to help you.
I just need to go to the washroom.
Okay? Right back.
Who does this?
Are you kidding me?
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