Original subtitles

If Lamont wanted to be an actor, he should forget about all that work -time

stuff and start coming to the movies with us.

That's right. And watch the real pros at work.

Yeah, the real pros.

He had acting class, he's taking up too much of his time, and he ain't even got

a part in one of them plays yet. Well, he's learning, Fred. You don't want him

to bite off more than he can chew.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

Godzilla did that one and threw up all over the Philippines.

Why didn't Lamont come with us tonight?

Well, tonight's his acting workshop, and he's trying out for a new play.

Well, maybe he'll get the part.

Fred, what am I eating?

Leftovers. From what?

July 23rd.

How was the movie?

Oh, Tony, it was just great. I mean, you should have went there with him, and

then you can learn acting. That's right.

Nobody grunts like Godzilla.

Well, maybe next time, Pop, but I got some pretty exciting news, man.

Oh, really? Guess what, Pop.

I finally got a part in a play.

Congratulations. Yeah. What's it about?

Well, see, it's about a boxer and his brother, and the boxer risks his life so

that he can make money in fights.

and put his brother, played by me, through medical school.

Is it all going to be funny at Lamont?

Well, the play's not funny at all, Elroy. You're going to want to see this

Pop. Not me. I don't like to see them old sister guys putting on powder

lipstick.

Okay,

I'd like to see you tell that to the lead in our play.

I will.

George Foreman.

George Foreman the fighter? That's right.

You're kidding.

George Foreman, the champ.

My... in a play with you in person?

Why are you lying to me, son?

I'm not lying to you, Pop. See, the workshop needs money, and George was

enough to volunteer services and do a play so we could charge admission and

the workshop going.

You hear that, Elroy? You hear that? I heard that, Fred.

Me and George Foreman, at the rehearsals, going out together, showing

around, being his buddy.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about showing an interest in my son and going to rehearsal with him.

Helping him with his lines.

Getting to meet the stars.

Wait a minute.

Now, George was nice enough. He's going to rehearse the play for a couple of

weeks. Then we're going to put it on.

He doesn't have time to be sitting around with you. Pop, the man is very

But I got to meet him, son. I followed him through all of his fights.

I even sent him a get well card to Zaire.

Look, Pop, I'm sure you'll get a chance to meet him.

Well, he'll be dying to meet me because I'm his biggest fan. I believe you, Pop.

Now, look, I tell you what. If you come out of rehearsal one day... One day?

What do you mean, one day? I'll be by every day.

I mean, I'll be there looking after you.

I don't know about that, Pop. Well, if you want to do that play with some

you better know about it.

You know, this is going to be one night for me, Godzilla and George Foreman.

knock him out.

No way.

Georgie Wynn blindfolded. Oh, yeah?

How about King Kong?

Blindfolded. Esther.

The only way he could

beat Esther is blindfolded.

Morning. Morning, son.

Morning, Pop. What you doing up so early? Oh, I just thought I'd give you a

learning your lines. You know, I'll take one part and you take yours. You don't

have to do that. You want a cup of coffee? Yeah.

Okay. Now, this is the script.

That's it right there. It starts on page 12, and I'm Biff. I'm the part of Biff.

Well. Yeah. Biff.

Biff. Yes, Biff.

All right.

I'll be the champ. You ready? Go ahead.

I'm doing this for you, Biff.

I don't want you to get hurt.

More feeling.

What? I mean, I don't believe it when you said, I don't want you to get hurt.

If you don't want Bill to get hurt, let him feel it. Try it again.

Pop, we've got a director now. Just help me with the lines.

Okay, okay.

Nobody's going to hurt me. And besides, you want to be a dancer, don't you?

That's doctor.

Yeah. You want to be a doctor, don't you? You know I do.

Sure I do.

Sure I do.

That's better, son. Let me see now.

Well, that's why I'm fighting, to get money to send you to college going to

door. You don't... You don't say going to

the door. That's a stage direction.

Oh.

I'll see you later, hiding his nervousness.

Pop, that's another direction.

Well, is this a strip or a map?

Honest, Pop, you don't have to help me with it. I know my lines.

I'll find out whether you know him when we get to rehearsal.

Now, you're not going to that rehearsal.

Yes, I am.

Rising to kill his only son.

Hey, listen, son. When do we start?

Oh, pretty soon, Pop. As soon as George Foreman gets here.

Um, Pop, this is Eugene Bancroft, and he's my father in the play.

He plays me?

Yeah, not exactly.

I'm just... father in the play. See, George Foreman plays my son the boxer,

Lamont plays my son the dancer.

That's doctor.

Well,

look, if you need any help, just give me a little shout -out. Give you a few

hints on how to play a dummy's father.

Would you please go sit down? The man can handle this himself.

Hey,

look here, director.

When are you going to start this thing?

Mr. Sanford, if you don't mind, I'll begin when I'm ready.

Having you here as an outsider has broken my rule.

You lucky the outsider hadn't broken your jaw.

Don't hold me now. What's the matter with you? Would you please just go and

down? I'm sorry, Mr. Creeley.

Pop's just a little anxious, you know, to see the champ.

I'm sorry.

Oh, that's all right. Just have a seat and try to remain silent.

Don't press your luck.

Okay.

Okay, let's go. I'm sorry I'm late.

Let's go. Let's go. That's quite all right, Mr. Farman. In fact, we are

certainly honored that you could join our little company, and we're certainly

honored that you would take the time out to help us raise the money to continue

our efforts here at the workshop.

Should be fun.

It certainly will be. I'd like you to meet our cast. This is Eugene Bancroft.

plays your father. Hi, Jim.

And this is Burt Morgan, the syndicate hitman. Hi, Jake. And Lamont Sanford

plays your brother. Hi, Bill Chan. Yeah, your skinny little brother.

And you, what do you play?

Anything you want to do.

Poker, gin, rummy, bingo.

You name it. I'm with you. I'm in your corner.

Oh, you played a pice drunk fighter.

I know, Tim.

See, this is my pop.

He's one of your biggest fans.

Mr. Creeley was kind enough to give him permission to sit in on one of our

rehearsals. Nice to meet you.

Hey, you hear that? He said nice to meet me. Talk to me.

Perhaps we could get started.

Will you be quiet? D .C. George is talking to me. Pop, would you go sit

Maybe we can get together a little later, Mr.

Sanford. Fred G. You call me Fred G. Sanford.

The G is for Golden Glove.

Place this, everyone.

Mr. Foreman, did you get a chance to look at the script?

Sure, on the plane. I think I got most of it. Good.

He got most of it on the plane, son. Did you hear that? I mean, he's great.

Let's start at the first scene.

Mr. Foreman, that's right before you come in. Your father and your brother

talking. Right, I know my cue. Excellent. He knows his cue. You hear

play fool, too.

Cue you, Gene.

I know you had your heart set on going to medical school, son, but... I

understand money. That's what it's all about. Isn't it, money?

That's what it's all about.

I guess you're just going to have to forget about being a dancer.

A nothing, a bum.

What was the point of me doing all that studying, all the good grades,

forgetting about football and social life, hitting the books every night? For

what? For what?

You'll act better next time, son. Would you be quiet?

I thought he was very sensitive.

Okay, okay.

I'm sorry. Well, take it from Lamont. For what? For what? I am the director

here, sir.

We'll take it from Lamont. For what? For what?

For what? For what?

Sometimes in life, son, you don't get everything that you aim for.

High. Bravo!

Bravo! Bravo!

Sorry.

Take it from high.

High. High, son.

Wait, what's the matter, Bill? What's the matter? You name it, that's what's

matter. It's about school.

Just isn't enough money.

Past tense.

What? There just wasn't enough money, but now there is. You're kidding.

More surprise, more surprise.

You're kidding.

Calm down, Biff.

You know, Mr. Sanford may have a point, if you don't mind.

Oh, no, I don't mind, Mr. Foreman. Anything you feel.

Well, if he don't show a lot of surprise, then I'd sort of look stupid

calm down.

That's right.

If he wasn't calmed up, how can he be calmed down?

I mean, that's right.

Well, all right, let's try it that way.

Culemon, you're kidding.

Calm down, Biff.

Money's no problem. You didn't sign with Piniella.

Sure, Pop. I can fight.

He's the promoter. I'll fight and we get money. No.

I already did.

I told you not to.

Hold it, hold it. Boring. Mr.

Sanford, we are rehearsing.

Well, you rehearsed it all wrong.

I mean, that's what a father, that's not what a father would say. Not what he

would do.

Look, look here, you big dummy.

I said no.

I said no, and I say no, I mean no.

Or would you like five across your lip?

say anything well is he a father does he know what a father would talk about i'm

a father and i tell you i'm right look i don't want to mix in but it may work if

eugene that would be a bit more forceful mr sanford reminded me of my own father

there for a minute well i mean it's only a suggestion so well yes

let's try it that way well take five and we'll start from the top

You boxed?

I was a middleweight.

Maybe you remember me.

Kid Death.

I see all the weight of steel in the middle.

Excuse me a minute, George.

Can I talk to my pop for a minute?

Sure. Is it all right with you, George?

Excuse me.

Hey, Pop, what's the matter with you? You're making a fool out of yourself.

Let's get that strip out. It costs money.

You're making a fool out of yourself.

What are you talking about? I'm talking about you, the senior citizen groupie.

Son, you have to understand that this is a dream come true.

Me and the champ.

I do understand that, Pop, but you're interrupting the rehearsal.

Well, that director don't know what he's talking about.

But he is the director.

We'll impeach him.

Pop, you're either going to have to be quiet or you're going to have to go

And that's what Mr. Creeley told me to tell you. Why didn't he tell me himself?

Because he's afraid of tear death. That's why.

Look, you told Eugene how to act, you told me how to react, you restaged the

whole third scene, and you changed the words of half the actors in the show.

Because I know what's real. Not Mr. Creepy Creely.

Yes.

Creepy Creely.

He done ruined the whole show, and I want George to look good. What about me?

Well, you can't look too good, son.

You don't have my profile.

darlings, let's get into act two.

Don't worry, son.

Listen, just act your heart out. All right.

Let's go now. This is the scene right before the big fight in the dressing

Why would it be a big fight in the dressing room?

Because the champ is going to lose on purpose.

Take a dive?

Because that's the way he's going to get enough money to get Biff through

medical school.

Where do we stand?

Oh.

Lamont, why don't you sit in the chair, and Eugene, you can stand behind

Lamont's chair.

Well, look, wouldn't he be near his son? I mean, he's going to fight, so he's

going to be there to encourage him. You know, he should be standing right next

to him. The champ should be off by himself.

Mr. Foreman, your line, please.

Dad, you don't have to stand next to me. Go on over there and cheer Bill.

I can't. I cannot go on. This is more than I can bear.

That's acting.

Not really. It was just the director that left.

Hey, we've got to have a director.

Look, seeing that we're all kind of amateurs at this, I've got a feeling

Freddy G has got just what it takes to get us through it.

Places, everyone!

You sure he's coming, Lamont? Oh, he'll be here. He wouldn't miss a chance to

direct you, champ. Yeah? Why didn't he drive over with you, then? Well, him and

his friend Elroy had to make a stop first.

Attention, please.

Cast, cast, quiet, quiet. What are you talking about, Elmer? Quiet, actor.

Your director's coming.

It's the Otto Preminger look.

You look fantastic, Freddy G.

Thanks, Lowe's. Now, let's get to work, darling.

Uh, Pop.

Mr. Spencer.

At home, you're my son. Here, you're just another actor. You can be replaced.

Places, everyone.

Elroy, give me some coffee. Coffee.

And a sweet roll. Sweet roll. Coffee.

Now, I've been looking over the play, and it lacks that certain something.

Now, the father's got to be tougher.

Champ. has got to be gentler, and the brothers got to be more cultured,

educated, and have an English accent.

Say what?

You heard me, dummy.

An English accent.

An added dimension to the character, old chap.

Why would I have an English accent?

Because I said so.

See, you'll have class like all those English actors.

Richard Burton, Alec Guinness, and, uh, uh, uh, Julie London.

That's ridiculous, Pop. I'm playing the part of a guy from the ghetto, man,

struggling to make it to the top.

I'm not playing the scarlet pimpernel.

The who?

I'm not going to do it.

Listen, I'm the director, and you're going to do what I say. Now, you know

closing lines act one.

Yeah, I know my line.

Send me the school sensation.

Now, just imagine the impact of that when the audience hears, Shipping off to

Oxford?

How charming.

Rather, Marvy.

Now, that's directing.

Give me a chair, Elroy.

Chair. And some fresh sweet rolls.

Sweet rolls.

All right, now we're going to take it right from the top.

From the top. Let's move from the top.

Look, Eugene.

Now, I want to see real tears coming out your eyes in that scene with the champ.

I can't cry no real tears.

You can't cry no real tears. What size shoe you wear?

Nine.

Well, put on some sevens.

with you and the champ, you'll cry from pain.

All right, now let's do it. Champ and the Biff scene.

All right, cue everyone.

Give me a cue. Move on out here.

Bill, I don't like this any more than you do.

I say it's just not cricket, actually.

to win on purpose is rather bourgeoisie, I say.

I don't have a choice. If I win, they'll kill me.

Oh, my.

Well, you are a marvelous chap and the most wonderful brother gentlemen could

have.

You'd do the same for me. I would. And I shall try to be the best physician in

the nation, my dear brother.

Hold it. Now, before you leave, look at him and give him a pat on the shoulder.

All right.

My dear brother.

All right, now, there's something missing.

A reaction from the champ.

I could, uh... Listen, no, no, you just hush. I'll do the thing for you, champ.

That's my job, see? Now, you do it fine, George, but the guy who plays your

brother... Hey, that's your son.

At home, he's my son.

Here, he's just the guy who's playing your brother, and he stinks.

Look, Freddie G, I appreciate the way you stepped in and took over.

But you're going to have to be more considerate of Lamar and the other

It's too late. He just isn't any good.

He's not good enough for Broadway, but honestly, I don't think you are either.

You think I'm too tough?

Tough and rough.

Thank you.

Let's lighten up and have some fun around here, okay?

Okay. You got it. Eugene.

Yeah, right. Look, I want to apologize for the way I've been treating you.

Okay. Okay, son. Let's rehearse now. From where?

We'll do the whole ending, but let's go over your exit speech first.

All right.

Well, it's just not cricket, actually.

That's not going to work. Look how everybody's laughing at me.

I'm not going to stand up here and make a fool of myself. out of myself when

this place starts like this before you came in this play this play had hearts

and guts and it meant something and you came in and changed it all around and i

don't mean nothing it's just foolish i'm gonna do it my way okay okay uh maybe

you're right but but that was it that that anger that fury that emotion that

active should we do the whole act now now champ uh you just decided to uh

to take a dive uh you hate the idea and you're all alone And you got to show

anger and frustration.

You got to hit the wall.

Lamont, Eugene, everybody, forgive me.

You're not mad at me? Sure I'm mad at you, thinking you're some kind of

pushing people around and ruining the play.

Then how come you're talking to me? You did what you thought was best.

Yeah, but what about the workshop?

No problem. The workshop's going to be fine. Look, we got a letter from George

Foreman. Here, I'll read it for you.

My fellow actors, I'm sorry I was the cause of the cancellation of the play,

I hope you'll let me come back next year and try again.

In the meantime, the enclosed check should cover the operating expenses.

for your group till I get back.

P .S., please make sure Freddy is around because... You hear that, Elroy? He

wants me.

The champ wants me around, and he sent some money, too.

He's everything I thought he was.

Because why am I... You better read this, Pop.

P .S., make sure Freddy's around because I just love to look at him.

His hair is my favorite color.

Leave.