Original subtitles

The last of it.

Thanks for the letter, Sam.

My washer, like, coughed up a hairball or something.

And I, uh, I have an appointment.

So I see.

Some appointment.

Sandy! What? Come on, I always give you juicy details.

Obviously you have a hot date tonight.

So?

Well, he's really nice, and he's really cute, and I think he's really

interested this third date.

Whoa, big number three.

Soft music, slow kisses.

Dinner at my place, at any rate.

Where'd you meet him?

You know, around.

Around?

Around where?

If I tell you, you promise not to whisper to a soul.

The personal.

You didn't!

Oh, they've got to be a bunch of ankle biters. Desperate loser seeks desperate

loser to have ugly children.

Excuse me.

Kelly, I'm sorry. I didn't mean... No, it's okay. I'm sure that's what

thinks.

That's why you can't tell anyone.

Scouts honor.

I'll just have to find someone else to go running with tomorrow. I'm sure

going to be exhausted after an intense night of cooking.

Nice try, Miss Marble.

Daylight. Be there or be round.

He was a cop and good at his job, but he committed the ultimate sin and

testified against other cops gone bad.

Cops that tried to kill him, but got the woman he loved instead.

Framed for murder, now he prowls the badlands. An outlaw hunting outlaws. A

bounty hunter.

A renegade.

You're welcome to call your doctor.

I'm not in shock. I'm thinking.

He must have come up behind her, as if to give her a hug or a kiss on the

He was left -handed, wasn't he? Miss, you don't want to give yourself

nightmares, all right? Leave this to the professionals.

I am a professional, thank you. I'm a licensed bail enforcement officer.

And a close friend of the victim, which is the only reason you're still here.

I told the uniform I don't know anything.

I never met the man. What do you have?

Nothing at this juncture.

What about fingerprints?

Witnesses? Dwayne, across the way, up half the night, listening to hip -hop.

Maybe he saw something. Like I said, miss, I'm not free to discuss.

anything at this juncture. Don't shut me out. I can help you.

I'm sorry, miss. I cannot discuss this. Right, okay. I know.

You wouldn't happen to have a badge number I can take down at this juncture.

Your FBI?

Is that a federal case?

Well, you better not hit that bag. Pardon me, knock the stuffing right out

it. I didn't get a workout in today.

I thought you had a run with Kelly.

No, I did not.

Not today.

Not ever again.

Must be one of those girl things, you know? Not going to talk to each other

anymore. Yeah, right, we're not talking.

Because Kelly is dead.

Dead.

Sandy, I know you want to avenge your buddy.

But if the feds are involved, we have to stay clear.

Why? Because of jurisdiction.

Because of not interfering with an ongoing investigation.

Because... Because of me.

Forget about you.

Because there's no bounty.

And way too much emotion.

I'm going to take Max over there to Big Bertha's Bail Bonds and Needles.

No, no, no, not Bertha. You do what you have to do.

Thanks, Reno.

We'll back you up any way we can. Right, Bobby?

Right?

Right.

Okay. So how well did you really know Kelly?

Real well.

There's nothing that would ever lead you to suspect that she was involved with

the FBI?

She worked for an optometrist named Levine. I doubt that he fronted for the

Michigan militia. And she didn't move across state lines, so there's only one

other reason why the FBI's involved.

The locals called it in. Why would they do that?

Sandy, it's very possible that your friend was a victim of a serial killer.

Excuse me.

Are you Gina Lang's father?

You newspaper vultures just never give up, do you? I'm not from the press, Mr.

Lang. I'm a bounty hunter. My name is Sandy Carruthers.

I'm all out of money, Miss Carruthers.

I'm all out of patience with your kind.

So if you don't mind, huh?

My best friend was murdered yesterday.

Maybe by the same man who killed Gina.

I could use some help carrying boxes.

There were seven unsolved homicides in the Bay City area last year.

Four of them were young, single, athletic.

I'm blonde.

Shouldn't be letting you go through Gina's things. The FBI said... Would

wait until the next victim.

No sale.

You know, I searched all the news reports that I could find on the web,

found out nothing about Gina Lang except that she died of devil.

She was 23 years old.

Studied sign language.

She collected dolls.

I'm so sorry, Mr. Lang.

Was Gina found at a table?

A dinner table?

How did you know? That's how I found Kelly.

With a full plate of food and burned down candles all around.

And a single yellow rose in her face.

A yellow rose?

I'm not supposed to tell anybody.

They said it would compromise the case.

Was she seeing anybody? Did she have a date that night?

She hadn't had a boyfriend in ages.

I used to kid her about it.

Said she could take an ad in the personals.

I'm going to take in your advice.

Hey, I thought I told you to stay off this case. Robert, look at this.

Four probables and a possible.

All son, kids, California girls. All of them blonde.

Except for Marcia Cross.

Young, attractive fit.

Huh. A follow -home from the gym?

I don't think so.

Kelly's date, she made me promise not to tell.

She met him in the classifieds.

Personals? Gina Lang also placed an ad.

I wish there was a way I could get to see them.

Yes, please come in.

She's been busy.

And I hear you've been harassing Bill Lang.

If a condolence call is considered harassment.

Excuse me, but my name is Robert J. Sixkiller, proprietor of Sixkiller

here, the place that you've just trespassed. Special agents Derek

Jeffrey Gorman. I sure hope I don't need a warrant to talk to your friend here.

That means I might have to trash this place just to justify the inconvenience.

What I want you to do is stop strong -arming my associate.

Ah, I see.

Any other requests?

Yeah, I have one.

I think you should alert the women of Bay City that there's a serial killer

there. A what? You heard me.

Some maniac is out there killing women at the dinner table. I count four,

possibly five so far. What do you suggest I do?

Send this local population into a little panic, possibly scare the perp into the

next county? Is that it? I think my neighbors have a right to defend

At whose expense?

The women in the next town this guy hits?

Look it, Miss Crothers, we know what we're doing, all right? You want to play

junior Miss Bounty Hunter, that's fine.

You stay out from underfoot, you got that?

For your information, hotshot, my associate here has evidence that... What

evidence? Oh, just a junior bounty hunter hunch.

We'll call you if it pans out.

You weren't going to give them my lead.

Your lead?

The feds are right.

What do you mean?

Am I not your best friend who would not steer you wrong?

Do us all a favor.

Stay off this case.

Is this the personal line department?

Eric Martin, administrator at your service.

Hi.

Well, I, um... Hi.

Hi.

I was thinking... Well, not really.

I gotta go.

You want to play it too personal? No, no. Um, sort of. Did you know that more

relationships are formed today through classifieds than any other method?

That can't be true.

Petite redhead.

Seeks Prince Charming.

Not anymore.

She's my fiancée.

Really?

Congratulations. Thanks. My point is that when was the last time you met the

next door at a church social?

Ah, well... If the boy next door really came knocking, you'd probably call the

cop. Um, is it safe?

Are singles bars safe?

Well, like, say I placed an ad and somebody wanted to know my name or what

wrote. They'd never get past me.

Not when I was subpoenaed.

Damn. I'm sorry?

I'm just a little confused by the whole thing. That's all.

You know, S -W -M -I -S -O -D -A -F. It's kind of like a can of alphabet soup

exploding. It's all right here in your personal line instruction sheet. I

guarantee you you'll find these stuck up on refrigerators all over Bay City.

I wouldn't even know the first thing to write.

It's easy.

Just be honest about who you are and what you're looking for.

Hello?

I'll be right back.

Think of another question.

Hi. Eric Martin, administrator.

Welcome to Personal Law. Have you ever placed an ad without before?

Just fine.

Absolutely fine.

What's wrong?

Well, I'm really, really worried about Sandy.

You think she's obsessed with the serial killer? I told her to back off the

case. Oh, and she always listens to you. She's impossible, infuriating,

irritating.

And so cute when she's angry.

Hey, our relationship is purely professional, okay?

The order's on the truck and the check's in the mail.

Will you please give me some credit for management skills around here, please?

Uh -huh.

Only congressmen and idiots get romantically involved with their staff.

Hello, personal line. Yes, I'd like to place a personal bet.

Okay. I'd like to start it with love to cook.

Leaving so soon? It's only 5 o 'clock.

Yeah, well, normal people leave work at 5 o 'clock. That's why they call it 9 to

5.

Yes, well, you're not a normal person. You're training for the Bounty Hunter

Olympics. Oh, did I just break the no private life rule?

Since you're cozy.

Excuse me, but I have a private life, too.

Hey.

Welcome to Planet Lenny.

Sandy, doll, I gotta tell you, you are one.

stick of babelicious gum oh that's so kind of you you know my mama always

told me left -handed men are the most charming i'm not left -handed right

-handed men mama always told me right -handed men are the most charming so

me what's a diamond like you doing in this pile of cubic zirconia

Got hung up at the gym. Who wants to leave when you got a major pump going?

right?

Where do you work out? I like Ironworks.

Serious free weights.

Should have seen the abs that I did today.

The thing about abs is, never carbo -load first.

Am I right?

You smoke?

Terrible habit, I know.

Oh, wow.

Uh, sorry. I mean, you're cute and all, but secondhand smoke would just kill my

aerobic capacity.

Your tummy?

In the flesh.

Your dad said that you were 30 -something.

You're only as old as you feel, I always say.

Oh.

Light?

Robert, you know what? Robert!

Hi. What are you doing here?

I track people for a living, remember?

You followed me. Followed you.

Traced you, tracked you with my Vulcan mind, mouth, whatever.

Thought I'd come over and check out your new bow.

Check out my... How dare you?

How dare me? How dare you?

You're the one who's sitting yourself up out here like live bait.

Look around you. What do you got, huh?

Got backup? No.

Protective armor? No.

I had to revoke your diploma.

I know you think that you're just looking out for me, but I know what I'm

I saw all the ads. All the dead women. They all had the same thing in their ad.

Oh, yeah? What'd it say? Here I am. Come and get me? Cooking.

Loves to cook. Will cook for you.

They all were very specific about cooking.

Well, what did your ad say?

Athletic, vivacious, blonde, loves to cook.

I did everything except advertise for a lefty. You sure he's left -handed?

Who trained me in forensics?

Well, none of your dates were southpaws.

You were watching the whole time?

You know, I kind of like Grandpa Moses the best.

I don't know.

Leisure suit Larry. Woo!

Amusing. Well, come on. Let's go. Back to the office.

Are you going to fire me?

I'm going to make you repeat lesson number one. Never work without a

But I've got four more dweebs coming.

All right.

Excuse me, Garcon.

I have a business proposition for you.

Double decaf cappuccino, nonfat, with a shot of hazelnuts.

I asked for cafe au lait with a shot of espresso.

Close enough.

Mocha, frappe, rapa, whatever it is.

Sheesh, it was a good old days when people just wanted a little cup of joe.

You're complaining?

I just spent two hours with Monroe, the taxidermist.

And Cedric, the man who collects exotic bottle openers.

And Ivan, who claims to be the lost heir to the throne of all the Russians.

Yes, well, they were all right -handed.

And they all had an alibi for last Friday night.

So our last loser of the evening is... Hi.

I'm Chris.

You must be Sandy.

It's such a pleasure to meet you.

Pleasure is all mine.

Can I sit down?

Oh, yeah.

Don't you dare go anywhere.

Is this Andy? What are you doing?

Bobby!

Listen, this guy was on a sales call. Albert didn't last Friday night. So,

are you doing wasting your time with this guy?

Because he's last on the list, and he's kind of nice.

Well, get rid of him.

Why?

Well, because.

Because, uh, we have a case. We've got to work on a case.

Of course it is. What else could it be?

We'll discuss the case in the morning.

Stop worrying. It's only coffee.

Worrying? I'm not worrying. What would I worry about, huh?

Boss, you worry too much.

You should have never given him this number.

As a waiter, Robert, you make a great bounty hunter.

Oh, come on. I just spilled a little water in the guy's lap. No big deal.

It was a pitcher.

I swear you did it on purpose.

Because I'm an overprotective lughead, right?

I didn't say lughead. I know you want to do. That's what you want to say.

Are you going to walk me up?

Nah, it's okay.

I have faith in you. You're a big girl.

Okay.

Talk to you later.

Good night.

He slipped the lock.

Did you buy a new deadbolt?

$89 .95 plus tax.

With every penny.

Thinking of you, you look good enough to eat. Yeah.

Well, you do look good enough to eat. It's just that... Ah, forget about it.

I hit pay dirt, Robert. I don't know what rock I kicked over.

But I'm close.

I can feel it.

Too close. We're taking three steps back.

Would you stop worrying about me?

I have an edge here. Do you know why?

We are still in first date land.

Excuse me?

Okay, pretend you're a girl.

Some guy answers your personal's ad. What do you do?

Ask them to send a naked picture.

A girl would have a phone conversation first.

And since paranoia is the best defense, they would agree to meet in a well -lit

public area. Date number one.

Date number two would probably take place in some cozy little restaurant.

So? All the killings happened on date number three.

Are you sure?

I'm sure.

He wins their trust, they invite him to their home, and then...

Then we nail him to the wall.

So what's so important you called me out of my office?

My operative says she's being followed. My grandmother says she's Grace Kelly.

So what?

Don't you cut the attitude, Taggart. You've been on this case since day one

you don't have Jack. And you do. You and Miss Five Foot Two Eyes of Blue. You've

got something, right?

You happen to be a pretty shade of chestnut.

How would you like to see all the murder victims' personal ads? Kelly O 'Rourke

was running a personal ad, huh?

No.

All the dead women were running personal ads.

Charged with obstruction of justice.

I could call my attorney. You probably wouldn't get your hands on this until I

would say about Christmas time.

Or we could do an even swap.

For what?

I want to see the psych profile on the perp.

The FBI has a cellar full of pasty -faced shrinks who do nothing but

psycho killers all day long.

And they say food service is a stressful job.

Yeah, well, according to them, he's transferring rage at his mother,

from an infantile oral fixation. Oh, that's great.

Does his profile have anything useful?

Useful? I got a 60 % probability on his favorite brand of toilet paper.

Check this out. White male, six foot tall or better, college dropout, left

-handed. We knew that.

Probably lives near the beach, probably drives a flashing car.

Well, that should narrow it down.

Yeah. We only had a list to narrow it down from.

Carpet picnic, anyone?

How did you know where I live?

Crisscross phone directory. A salesman's best friend.

Am I being too nervy?

Are you mad?

I just, I had such a nice time with you the other day.

So is this our second date?

Then dad got promoted and I set a new family record.

Nine grades in five different schools. Excuse me. Army bread here.

Nine grades, nine schools.

Thank God for Mr. French and the Brady Bunch.

Being lonely sucks, doesn't it?

You're really sweet, you know that?

But... But?

There's someone else?

No. No, not really. I mean, he never... No.

Get out your snowshoes. We have a blizzard of paperwork that we have to

through. I brought Chinese.

What is he doing here? Isn't that our waiter?

She forgot her sunglasses.

Look, I better head out.

What do you think?

Dinner tonight?

I don't know. Can I call you?

Anytime, anywhere, for anything.

Lunch with the suspects, huh?

Crick didn't do it. He was an Alba cookie, remember?

Besides, he's a good listener.

Doesn't boss me around.

This is the FBI psychological profile on the killer. I make a mild suggestion

that you look it over.

FBI profile?

Who did you blackmail to get this?

Traded for it.

Traded what?

Jimmy Hoffa, that guy?

I gave him the personals.

You gave them my lead.

You had no right.

Well, excuse me, Your Majesty. I didn't know I needed permission in order to

investigate a murderer.

I worked hard to get that lead. I went without sleep.

I broke into private files.

That is your job. And I can see how much you went without sleep.

Maybe I should be looking in the one head instead of the personal.

I was going to go now.

So go.

I sort of have dinner date.

Yes, well, Mazel Tov don't eat the garlic bread.

Unless you want me to stay, I'll... Well, we decided everyone here gets a

private life, right?

What? Bobby, it's Reno.

What do you want? What's wrong with you?

Paper cut.

If you say so. Look, I dug up something interesting on Bachelor Number One. That

guy, Chris Gardner.

His alibi doesn't hold up.

He had reservations for Albuquerque, but his name wasn't on the flight manifest.

And he didn't check into his hotel room.

I think I should go talk to him. You bet you should. He's with Sandy right now.

I sure hope you're not one of those no -salt, fat -breed...

Free -range chicken kind of guys.

Not even close.

I'll eat anything that won't eat me first.

I didn't know you were left -handed.

Sort of ambidextrous.

It's one of those lefties forced to do everything right -handed.

I think it left me a little crazy in the head.

This is Sandy.

Is he there? Can you hear me?

He... Yes to the first question, no to the second.

Marketing survey. It's amazing how they always know when it's dinner time.

His alibi washed out, Sandy.

He never made it to his plane. He never slept at his hotel.

He's never been to Albuquerque. Reno and I were on our way.

So how can I be of assistance?

Sit still. Keep your distance.

And whatever you do, don't eat dinner.

Well, that's going to be a little difficult.

Luring people away from AT &T, but I wish you luck.

Not typical.

Well, look at that. It's time to put the casserole back in. It's kind of cold.

I'm sure it's fine. It's the way it is.

He did his good, too.

So what do you say we play a game of cards?

How about a waltz instead?

Okay.

Hey!

You lady killer, freeze!

I should have known better than to look in the personals. Hey, where are my

wallets? In my back pocket. Please, don't hurt me. Hurt you?

You psychotic son of a... You were going to make Sandy number six on your list,

weren't you?

Six? What?

Bobby, go deal with him in jail.

Jail? Wait, you can send me to jail for adultery?

Adultery.

Sandy, I'm sorry. I'm married.

That's why you lied about going to Albuquerque? I was staying in a motel in

Dimas.

You're not going to tell my wife, are you?

We'd be doing her a favor.

Oh, come on.

It's seven years, you know?

You can't keep blowing in the same year every day of the week.

I think I better escort this Don Juan to his car before he puts his foot any

further down his mouth.

It's okay.

You've done enough already.

I know, but I would like... I mean it. You've done way too much already.

You know, I want you to be honest with me, all right?

When you look at me, what do you see?

Tonto.

Pretty mouthy for a refugee from Leonard Skinner, ladies and gentlemen.

Come on, I'm being serious.

Hey, brother, do I look like husband material to you?

Did you say husband?

I'm getting older now.

I'm almost a little over 30.

And, uh, well, I just... Maybe it's time to start a family.

This is about Sandy, isn't it? Man, that girl, she's under my skin. Every time I

see a broken -down blue Toyota, my heart starts to pump hard and my stomach's

got butterflies.

So tell her.

No can do. She hates me.

Get out of here.

That's a sad fact, but true. She thinks I'm overbearing, overreactive, and

controlling.

You don't think I'm controlling, do you?

Listen.

Have you shared this vital information with the object of your desire?

Well... I thought so.

Call her. I can't call her.

She hates me.

She doesn't hate you.

Call her.

Call her tomorrow. I know we'll take a look at the Southpaw Slayer file, okay?

think we're getting real close.

Sure. Mm -hmm.

ready for din -din.

Will you stop that? You're making me dizzy.

We're missing something. It's driving me nuts.

Well, look.

We know she set the bait. She got the rose. If it wasn't dimples back there,

must have been one of the others.

You went through all those guys with the lint brush.

There's something we're not seeing. What is it that we're not seeing, damn it?

Hey, will you relax? I didn't do it, okay?

Sorry.

Just the idea of her being the site of some maniac.

Hey, that's not going to happen.

Ta -da.

Mama's secret recipe.

I promise you.

It's the taste sensation of a lifetime.

Hey, which

one was Eric?

Eric who?

Looks like Martin.

A note on the back. I wish they were all as sweet as you.

Sweet as underlined.

She didn't date anybody named Eric.

Name's on the receipt, man. The Bay City Gazette.

Let me take a look at that.

One week run. It's from a personal ad.

Damn. Hey, man. Ready?

See how it slopes in the back? How much you want to bet this was written by a

left -handed person?

The end of a blue. All bets are off. I'm calling Sandy right now.

Hey, who should be talking to this late?

Bobby, she's got a call waiting.

Oh, God.

I'm sorry.

Did I snag that pretty hair?

Souvenir.

I never met a real live bounty hunter before.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I missed that.

If you... If

you undie me and walk away,

I can guarantee your safety.

And spoil this lovely meal.

I'm not sure I should let you defile mother's food with your dirty mouth.

Well, maybe just a tan.

Open the hangar.

The airplane's coming in to land.

My mother's food, you slut!

No. Not like that!

I'm not ready for you yet.

Let her go.

This is a private dinner party.

You weren't invited.

Leave me.

You touch her, pal.

Dinner. Touch her?

Huh? Touch her?

Like that? Huh?

Or like... Or like...

Like that?

Where is Fred the Fed when you need him?

I thought Tigard and those guys had me under surveillance.

Well, I had to send them on that alien invasion thing.

The what?

Well, I had to bring Reno in, right?

And, well, if you were being circled by the Federales, then it would have just

been a whole big... Robert, you are one of a kind.

You did real good back there, Sandy.

Made me proud.

And I've been doing some thinking.

I've been thinking, too.

About us.

You're my role model, Robert.

You're my boss, my buddy, my hero.

How much better than a boyfriend?

Don't make me trade down.

I still want you to keep...