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1
00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:23,756
...the car crash,
the afterlife, and the Amish.
2
00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:26,458
I can take whatever that
shadowy motherfuck dishes out
3
00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:28,293
and throw it back
twice as hard.
4
00:00:28,295 --> 00:00:29,361
I need your help.
5
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,662
I'm putting ateam together
6
00:00:30,664 --> 00:00:32,231
to take this mysteryfucker down.
7
00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:33,499
If I was selfish...
8
00:00:33,501 --> 00:00:36,268
there is no way I'd let
a hot piece of ass like you
9
00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:38,437
marry a half-sack
like Chester Vince.
10
00:00:40,073 --> 00:00:42,207
But I can't
sell the dealership.
11
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,642
Numbnuts is a partner.
12
00:00:43,644 --> 00:00:45,811
So is that lanky white
shadow of his,
13
00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:47,446
and my maggot ex-wife.
14
00:00:47,448 --> 00:00:49,415
But you are themajority partner!
15
00:00:49,417 --> 00:00:51,450
So long, suckers.
16
00:00:51,452 --> 00:00:53,652
Miami or bust.
17
00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:56,422
Beaver Moon Saloon?
18
00:00:56,424 --> 00:00:59,591
You've been sleepwalking!It's you!
19
00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:00,826
The only thing you have to do
20
00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:02,361
to [unclear]
the Beaver Moon
21
00:01:02,363 --> 00:01:05,064
is cancel the hit that
you placed on yourself!
22
00:01:05,066 --> 00:01:06,598
Too late, fuckers.
23
00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:11,737
Richard,
thank God you survived!
24
00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:15,541
Once again,
bourbon saved the day.
25
00:01:18,111 --> 00:01:22,147
Finally, everything'scomin' up Fitzy.
26
00:01:22,149 --> 00:01:24,383
Ring-a-ding-ding.
27
00:01:24,385 --> 00:01:34,226
♪
28
00:01:34,228 --> 00:01:38,430
Check that adorable shit out.
29
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:40,265
From the moment I was born,
30
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,568
it was obvious that Fitzyhad what it took
31
00:01:42,570 --> 00:01:45,170
to be number one.
32
00:01:45,172 --> 00:01:47,439
Sex appeal.
33
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:49,141
[flatulent noise]
34
00:01:49,143 --> 00:01:51,677
Fuckload of charisma.
35
00:01:51,679 --> 00:01:54,480
Jesus, Kid.
You stink.
36
00:01:54,482 --> 00:01:57,249
And always beingin the right place
37
00:01:57,251 --> 00:01:58,484
at the right time.
38
00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:03,155
Mmmm...
39
00:02:03,157 --> 00:02:05,557
When God gives youthis much awesome,
40
00:02:05,559 --> 00:02:09,294
you have no choicebut to be king...
41
00:02:29,415 --> 00:02:31,550
T-minus awesome, Richard.
42
00:02:31,552 --> 00:02:32,684
Almost ready to
cut the ribbon.
43
00:02:32,686 --> 00:02:34,720
Are the strippers here?
One plays the lute!
44
00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:35,821
Olives?
Stuffed.
45
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:38,157
Bed in the VIP lounge?
I chose not to notice.
46
00:02:38,159 --> 00:02:40,159
Of course you didn't,
you flaccid albino.
47
00:02:40,161 --> 00:02:42,594
But I did, and
everything's ready to roll.
48
00:02:42,596 --> 00:02:44,696
Let's do this.
49
00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:47,599
Real primo crop.
50
00:02:47,601 --> 00:02:49,468
Same stuff the boys had
backstage at the Sands.
51
00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:51,170
[siren]
Nice.
52
00:02:51,172 --> 00:02:54,306
Hey!
Valet's that way!
53
00:02:55,441 --> 00:02:58,377
Nice place you got here, Fitz.
54
00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:00,879
It's always ladies' night
at the Summerwind, Officer.
55
00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:05,584
And here's an opening
night present.
56
00:03:05,586 --> 00:03:07,686
Oh, that's nice.
57
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:10,656
...the municipality
of Coverton...
58
00:03:10,658 --> 00:03:12,291
...environmental survey...
59
00:03:12,293 --> 00:03:14,359
...endangered speckled
titmouse...
60
00:03:16,229 --> 00:03:17,529
This is a demolition order!
61
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,830
Bull shit.
62
00:03:18,832 --> 00:03:20,732
You're not gonna tear down my
place for some fuckin' mouse.
63
00:03:20,734 --> 00:03:22,501
I think it's a bird.
64
00:03:22,503 --> 00:03:25,237
Mouse. Bird.
Who cares?
65
00:03:25,239 --> 00:03:26,905
It lives here.
It's endangered.
66
00:03:26,907 --> 00:03:28,440
And this is
its protected -
67
00:03:28,442 --> 00:03:30,509
It's a fucking parking lot.
68
00:03:30,511 --> 00:03:34,446
You got enemies in
high places, Fitz.
69
00:03:34,448 --> 00:03:37,449
All right!
Everyone! Party's over!
70
00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:40,719
Clear out or we'll
start checking parole orders!
71
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:43,956
Whoa! Whoa!
Where are you all going?
72
00:03:43,958 --> 00:03:47,326
Come on guys.
Drinks half price!
73
00:03:47,328 --> 00:03:48,927
First round only.
74
00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:50,462
No top shelf.
75
00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,766
A raid, and we're
not even open yet.
76
00:03:57,370 --> 00:03:59,304
Fuck.
77
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:15,354
♪
78
00:04:52,325 --> 00:04:53,892
Bulldozers rolling in.
79
00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:56,595
Those city fucks want
to start the tear down tomorrow.
80
00:04:56,597 --> 00:04:58,330
Old man's in Miami,
81
00:04:58,332 --> 00:04:59,665
Meghan's rotting
in the psych ward,
82
00:04:59,667 --> 00:05:00,966
Mom's AWOL,
83
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,834
who else would want
to fuck with me?
84
00:05:02,836 --> 00:05:04,436
You'd think the city
would rally around
85
00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:05,436
its most wholesome citizen.
86
00:05:05,438 --> 00:05:08,340
I make you bar manager
and that's the thanks I get?
87
00:05:08,342 --> 00:05:09,908
Yeah. A real thanks
would have been a moat.
88
00:05:09,910 --> 00:05:11,310
With mermaids.
89
00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:12,611
You made her manager?
90
00:05:12,613 --> 00:05:15,414
Who makes your
coffee in the morning
91
00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:17,482
and cleans up the vomit
from the night before?
92
00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:19,384
If anyone should be
number two it's me.
93
00:05:19,386 --> 00:05:21,787
You're always number
two to me, Larry.
94
00:05:21,789 --> 00:05:22,988
That's a poop joke!
95
00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:24,823
You're not management
material, Larry.
96
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,725
And you never will be.
97
00:05:26,727 --> 00:05:28,994
That is patently
untrue and false
98
00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:31,463
and a big fat lie!
99
00:05:31,465 --> 00:05:32,998
Can we please focus
here people!
100
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,666
My future is on the line.
101
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:35,967
And my six month plan.
102
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,803
My pride.
My courage!
103
00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,404
No, that's the Cowardly
Lion. What do I get to lose?
104
00:05:39,406 --> 00:05:40,672
Your ass if you don't
figure out a way
105
00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:42,674
to sabotage that
bulldozer stat.
106
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:43,942
On it.
107
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:47,746
No way I'm going to let
some stupid mouse stop me.
108
00:05:47,748 --> 00:05:49,047
Fuck city hall.
109
00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:51,616
It's about time this town
had a decent place to drink.
110
00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:55,754
To the titmouse, Asshole.
111
00:05:58,124 --> 00:05:59,791
Fuck.
112
00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:09,000
16,100, and I will personally
clean the back seat for you.
113
00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:10,602
No, I'm good.
114
00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:12,371
15,900!
Bye.
115
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:17,109
Again, you do not
make the sale?
116
00:06:17,111 --> 00:06:18,877
Again, they are
asking for Fitz!
117
00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:22,047
But, the Ruptals ascended
to power six months ago!
118
00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:24,015
You guys seen my blow torch?
119
00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:25,884
Thought I was using
it the other day...
120
00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:26,952
Cousin, what is he doing here?
121
00:06:26,954 --> 00:06:28,587
We have fired him
many, many times.
122
00:06:28,589 --> 00:06:29,955
You want me to remove him?
123
00:06:29,957 --> 00:06:31,089
I'm your elder -
124
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:34,860
It is my duty
to allow you to learn.
125
00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:37,763
Found it!
126
00:06:41,701 --> 00:06:42,734
Fine.
127
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:43,902
Let us decide
128
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:46,772
in the way Cousin Rulalabab
chooses suicide bombers.
129
00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:48,974
Rock, papers, pipe bomb.
130
00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,015
Perhaps we will do
what he did
131
00:06:57,017 --> 00:06:59,951
before he left
for flight school.
132
00:06:59,953 --> 00:07:03,789
Ignore the enemy
until he goes away?
133
00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:07,993
Beautiful.
134
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:10,962
[groaning]
135
00:07:10,964 --> 00:07:15,500
♪ Ring-a-ding-dingAnswer the phone ♪
136
00:07:17,970 --> 00:07:19,571
What do you want?
137
00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:20,972
Hey, Jackass.
138
00:07:20,974 --> 00:07:22,474
You flat on your face yet?
139
00:07:22,476 --> 00:07:24,476
Not as flat as your saggy ass.
140
00:07:24,478 --> 00:07:26,645
Hey - they sell
waterproof Depends in Miami?
141
00:07:26,647 --> 00:07:28,613
I get more pussy
and blow at 65
142
00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:29,748
then you ever will.
143
00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:32,684
Right, that's why
you're calling me.
144
00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:34,085
Things sound awful quiet.
145
00:07:34,087 --> 00:07:36,688
Business must be booming
at that lounge of yours.
146
00:07:36,690 --> 00:07:37,489
It is...
147
00:07:37,491 --> 00:07:38,889
and you can forget about
ever getting a reservation,
148
00:07:38,891 --> 00:07:40,892
you cancerous puss nugget.
149
00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:42,761
That's the best you got?
150
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,830
Hey!
can someone bring me a scotch!
151
00:07:44,832 --> 00:07:46,898
I'm Ken fucking Fitzpatrick!
152
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:49,100
This is a nail bar,
Asshole.
153
00:07:50,603 --> 00:07:53,972
I'll let you get backto your boyfriend.
154
00:07:59,111 --> 00:08:00,812
Get the car.
Legs!
155
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:02,047
Where are we going?
156
00:08:02,049 --> 00:08:03,482
As the old saying goes:
157
00:08:03,484 --> 00:08:05,050
If someone tries to fuck
up your dream lounge
158
00:08:05,052 --> 00:08:06,885
then you fuck back harder.
159
00:08:06,887 --> 00:08:08,620
Funny, I don't know that one.
160
00:08:08,622 --> 00:08:10,789
Amateur.
Shotgun!
161
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:14,092
But I always get shotgun.
162
00:08:21,701 --> 00:08:24,769
City Hall - the hallowed
tower of opportunity!
163
00:08:24,771 --> 00:08:26,838
Teach these fuckers
to mess with Fitz.
164
00:08:28,975 --> 00:08:30,942
Larry, go shit in this bag.
Ew!
165
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:32,110
That's your plan?
166
00:08:32,112 --> 00:08:33,512
That's only the first part.
167
00:08:33,514 --> 00:08:34,913
Then, we light it on fire.
168
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:36,715
That's unsanitary.
169
00:08:36,717 --> 00:08:38,783
Finesse, morons.
170
00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:40,919
This is politics.
You need an 'in.'
171
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:42,954
Otherwise it's red tape
this, procedure that...
172
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:44,089
Fuck procedure.
173
00:08:44,091 --> 00:08:45,757
Richard you owe
thirty-six-hundred dollars
174
00:08:45,759 --> 00:08:46,925
in parking fines.
175
00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:48,927
You walk through those doors,
you could be arrested.
176
00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:50,228
Something a certain someone
should have known
177
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:51,563
if she were on
top of things...
178
00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:52,831
Fine.
You're the conscience.
179
00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:54,633
Go in there and
say sorry and shit.
180
00:08:56,569 --> 00:08:59,671
Dot Foxley!
181
00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:00,941
Melody Gray!
182
00:09:00,943 --> 00:09:02,941
I haven't seen you
183
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:05,844
since you slept your way
through student council.
184
00:09:05,846 --> 00:09:08,179
I'd heard you lost
the back forty.
185
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:10,882
The botox looks great,
by the way.
186
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:12,250
You can barely
see the paralysis.
187
00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:14,286
Who is this bad boy?
188
00:09:14,288 --> 00:09:16,187
Call me Fitz.
189
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:17,789
Hubby?
190
00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:19,257
Oops - no ring.
191
00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:21,026
I'm concentrating
on my career.
192
00:09:21,028 --> 00:09:22,794
She stole my job
as bar manager!
193
00:09:22,796 --> 00:09:24,129
Bar manager?
194
00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:26,164
Oh, Hon, night jobs
are tough at our age.
195
00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:28,033
With three kids,
stay at home hunk
196
00:09:28,035 --> 00:09:29,668
and a successful
journalism career
197
00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:31,903
it's all deadlines
and mommy duty for me.
198
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,104
I could use a mommy.
199
00:09:33,106 --> 00:09:34,773
Yeah, so could
my eight year-old
200
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:36,641
but I'm here for yet
another Fundraiser...
201
00:09:36,643 --> 00:09:37,876
My God,
I am so sick and tired
202
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:39,244
of people raising
awareness about things.
203
00:09:39,246 --> 00:09:40,912
If it's not some
new disease
204
00:09:40,914 --> 00:09:42,781
then it's an
endangered animal.
205
00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:44,649
What the heck is a
titmouse, anyway?
206
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,354
Uh, you know...
207
00:09:49,356 --> 00:09:52,357
Richard is most
amusing at parties.
208
00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:53,925
You have no idea.
209
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:55,627
Really?
210
00:09:55,629 --> 00:09:58,296
Well, maybe
you could be my plus one.
211
00:09:58,298 --> 00:10:00,799
Looks like I found my "in."
212
00:10:04,837 --> 00:10:07,939
That worked out well,
didn't it, Dot?
213
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:09,341
Blow me.
214
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:17,215
Open bar?
215
00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:18,950
This is how they
spend my tax dollars?
216
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,620
If you paid taxes.Keep it down!
217
00:10:21,622 --> 00:10:22,854
First rule of politics.
218
00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:23,922
You want something done,
219
00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:25,123
you gotta know
who to drink with.
220
00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:26,958
And marry a man who
lets Mommy swing.
221
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:30,161
Listen, Gray.
222
00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:31,296
I am not going to let you fuck
223
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:32,965
or fuck over my
business partner.
224
00:10:32,967 --> 00:10:34,266
A little coincidental
225
00:10:34,268 --> 00:10:35,866
that you just happen
to run into the one man
226
00:10:35,868 --> 00:10:37,035
who'd make for great copy
227
00:10:37,037 --> 00:10:38,335
if he goes ape shit
at this fundraiser.
228
00:10:38,337 --> 00:10:39,938
I know!
229
00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:42,040
"Local low life vs. City Hall" -
230
00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:44,743
super catchy, right?
231
00:10:44,745 --> 00:10:46,945
Like the herpes you
gave the chess club.
232
00:10:51,050 --> 00:10:53,084
Richard, any one of
these power hungry titans
233
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:54,352
could be the villain
234
00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:55,920
threatening to
ruin your dream -
235
00:10:55,922 --> 00:10:57,989
...and shoe-in forCity Councilor -
236
00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:00,325
Chester Vince!
237
00:11:00,327 --> 00:11:04,062
[applause]
238
00:11:04,064 --> 00:11:09,034
Or it could be exactly
the douchebag we expected.
239
00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:16,307
[birds chirping]
240
00:11:18,444 --> 00:11:21,179
Heartbreaking cry
for help, isn't it?
241
00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:22,313
Would you believe
242
00:11:22,315 --> 00:11:24,449
there are only tweleve
of the little guys left?
243
00:11:24,451 --> 00:11:26,217
Rest assure, little Titmouse,
244
00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:27,952
the good
people of Coverton
245
00:11:27,954 --> 00:11:29,220
will not let the vice
246
00:11:29,222 --> 00:11:32,223
and filth of this
town destroy you!
247
00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:34,693
[cheering]
248
00:11:35,828 --> 00:11:37,195
[bird sings]
249
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:40,065
[applause]
250
00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:43,068
Care to comment?
251
00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:44,135
No!
252
00:11:44,137 --> 00:11:45,804
Perhaps you could
give us a moment.
253
00:11:45,806 --> 00:11:47,072
Simple fucking math.
254
00:11:47,074 --> 00:11:48,373
He shuts down my bar.
255
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:49,941
I tear his tiny nuts off.
256
00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:51,376
Anyone with a magnifying glass
257
00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:53,111
feel free to tag along.
258
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:54,979
Richard, wait!
259
00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:59,350
Pummelling Chester won't
get you back the Summerwind!
260
00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:00,819
Let's test that theory.
261
00:12:00,821 --> 00:12:02,120
The last thing we need
262
00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:03,388
is to give ammo
to Melody Gray.
263
00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:05,390
She faked incest to
get a poem in our yearbook.
264
00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,292
My my, look whose
petty high school rivalry
265
00:12:07,294 --> 00:12:08,827
is tarnishing
Richard's reputation?
266
00:12:08,829 --> 00:12:10,329
How are you gonna help,you oversized Chia Pet?
267
00:12:10,331 --> 00:12:11,229
Stand around, talkabout feelings?
268
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:12,432
I'm a sensitive manwith gentle solutions.
269
00:12:12,434 --> 00:12:14,432
Who knows nothingabout politics.
270
00:12:14,434 --> 00:12:16,935
I should be number two!
271
00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:20,138
[loud cross-talk]
272
00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:21,239
Richard, would you please
273
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:22,974
let your conscience
lead for once, and --
274
00:12:22,976 --> 00:12:24,242
New plan.
275
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,211
You want a shot at Dot's gYes!
276
00:12:26,213 --> 00:12:29,214
Go find out whatever you can
from that milquetoast Chester.
277
00:12:29,216 --> 00:12:31,249
And try to blend,
for Christ's sake.
278
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:32,084
What the fuck?
279
00:12:32,086 --> 00:12:32,984
You want to keep your job?
280
00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:35,353
You do whatever it takes
to get your buddy
281
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:37,288
to turn that story
in my favour.
282
00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:38,456
'Course I love the titmouse.
283
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:39,791
That's why I built
my bar there!
284
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:41,025
Done!
285
00:12:41,027 --> 00:12:42,761
And I'll do what I do best.
286
00:12:42,763 --> 00:12:44,329
Get us arrested?
287
00:12:44,331 --> 00:12:45,997
Work my own connections.
288
00:12:45,999 --> 00:12:48,099
From the inside.
289
00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:53,371
♪ Run from the tiger
290
00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:55,874
You've got to run really fast
291
00:12:55,876 --> 00:12:57,842
♪ Run from the tiger
292
00:12:57,844 --> 00:12:59,778
♪ Or he's gonna bite your...
293
00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:02,380
Whoa! hey, guys!
294
00:13:02,382 --> 00:13:04,415
Wow, does this ever
look like a bomb
295
00:13:04,417 --> 00:13:06,384
for something that's
clearly not a bomb.
296
00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:09,154
It's a... clock radio.
Ignore him, cousin.
297
00:13:09,156 --> 00:13:10,388
Attached to road flares...
and a detonator.
298
00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:11,823
To wake me up.
299
00:13:14,026 --> 00:13:16,227
It's like they can't see me!
300
00:13:17,196 --> 00:13:21,332
Okay.
I see what's going on.
301
00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:23,101
I think it is working,
Cousin!
302
00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:24,502
Very soon, the Fitzpatrick
lover
303
00:13:24,504 --> 00:13:27,438
will see common sense
and he'll be gone.
304
00:13:31,577 --> 00:13:34,379
Operation Black Out...
305
00:13:34,381 --> 00:13:37,148
I'm invisible!
Yeah!
306
00:13:42,955 --> 00:13:44,823
Oh no!
Leaving so soon?
307
00:13:44,825 --> 00:13:46,925
Are they out of donut holes?
308
00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:48,526
Oh, Melody.
309
00:13:48,528 --> 00:13:49,994
I could stand here all day
310
00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:51,396
and reminisce about
your original nose
311
00:13:51,398 --> 00:13:52,597
but why don't we talk
312
00:13:52,599 --> 00:13:54,365
about how your
little news story
313
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:56,835
is going to get Richard
Fitzpatrick his bar back.
314
00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:59,838
Excuse me,
but I'm an ethical journalist.
315
00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,307
I only report the
news I manufacture.
316
00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:05,176
Here's news:
317
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,478
you do not want to
go to war with me.
318
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:12,350
Honey, your size two panties
don't fool me.
319
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:15,220
Look at your life.
320
00:14:15,222 --> 00:14:17,455
Now look at mine.
321
00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:19,023
I have a plan.
322
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,459
Bar manager at a sleazy lounge.
That is some plan.
323
00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:25,363
Oh Foxley, that's
always been your problem.
324
00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:26,598
You keep aiming low
325
00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:29,033
and you'll never
hit the bulls-eye.
326
00:14:38,444 --> 00:14:42,413
So you actually went and
married that ass cracker?
327
00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:45,483
You mean my decent
responsible husband
328
00:14:45,485 --> 00:14:47,118
with a promising future?
329
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:49,320
Then a belated
toast to the bride.
330
00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:51,089
Double scotch for the lady.
331
00:14:51,091 --> 00:14:52,457
Nothing for me.
332
00:14:55,461 --> 00:14:57,929
Why don't you just do or say
333
00:14:57,931 --> 00:14:59,430
whatever horrible thing
it is you're inevitably
334
00:14:59,432 --> 00:15:00,999
about to say or do to me.
335
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:03,001
Get it over with and go.
Please.
336
00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:04,435
Sure.
As soon as you tell
337
00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:06,204
that yeast infection
you call a husband
338
00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:08,072
to stay the fuck
out of my way.
339
00:15:08,074 --> 00:15:09,072
Closing my bar
340
00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:11,242
isn't going to score
points with any voters.
341
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:12,644
Chester's run for office
342
00:15:12,646 --> 00:15:14,512
has nothing to do with
your sleazy lounge.
343
00:15:14,514 --> 00:15:17,148
Yet he sends a bulldozer
in lieu of flowers.
344
00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:18,283
That's a coincidence.
345
00:15:18,285 --> 00:15:21,486
Chester promised that you
were out of our lives.
346
00:15:21,488 --> 00:15:23,521
It was in the vows.
347
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:25,323
I know it's hard
for you to believe,
348
00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:27,258
but I am over you.
349
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:30,161
Then walk away.
350
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:33,264
You walk away.
351
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:35,400
If that's what you want,
I will.
352
00:15:35,402 --> 00:15:37,669
But it's not gonna
help you get over me.
353
00:15:37,671 --> 00:15:42,040
I can, however,
help you get under me...
354
00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:48,546
Thank you so much...
355
00:15:48,548 --> 00:15:50,248
Great to see you.
356
00:15:50,250 --> 00:15:51,249
All the best.
357
00:15:51,251 --> 00:15:53,117
[coughing]
358
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:55,620
We should have known you were
behind this titmouse treachery.
359
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:57,422
Uh...
No smoking.
360
00:15:57,424 --> 00:15:59,057
Oh, sorry.
361
00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:01,159
If you're here about
that degenerate's bar,
362
00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:02,627
I don't know
anything about it.
363
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:05,663
[coughing]
What has Richardever done to you?
364
00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:07,732
Aside from
repossessing your car,
365
00:16:07,734 --> 00:16:10,335
bankrupting you
366
00:16:10,337 --> 00:16:12,670
having relations with
Ali on your wedding day.
367
00:16:12,672 --> 00:16:14,405
Richard Fitzpatrick
is a scourge.
368
00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:17,475
[choking coughs]An alcoholic usedcar salesman, nothing more.
369
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,277
A man so loathsome and foul,
370
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:21,579
even his own parents
can't stand him.
371
00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:25,283
All true, but he
has great potential
372
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:27,552
and you can't
stand in our way.
373
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:30,621
Says who?
374
00:16:30,623 --> 00:16:32,490
Says Larry.
375
00:16:35,194 --> 00:16:37,595
Would you excuse me?
376
00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:38,997
"Muh muh scuse me?"
377
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,368
[coughing]
378
00:16:47,606 --> 00:16:50,074
Oh God!
What have I done?
379
00:16:56,615 --> 00:17:10,228
♪
380
00:17:10,230 --> 00:17:13,131
Genie's beard!
381
00:17:13,133 --> 00:17:15,166
The hummus is...
382
00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:16,768
Yes, this is very good hummus!
383
00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:19,070
The secret ingredient
is the garlic.
384
00:17:19,072 --> 00:17:20,605
Delicious, actually.
385
00:17:25,644 --> 00:17:28,679
Looks like I have a datewith the bulldozer!
386
00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:30,515
I'm invincible!
387
00:17:32,451 --> 00:17:35,286
I have seen the
heart of darkness!
388
00:17:38,357 --> 00:17:40,191
Breathe, dead mouse!
Breathe!
389
00:17:41,493 --> 00:17:44,262
This is what I get for trying
to be something that I'm not!
390
00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:48,633
I'm not management material.
391
00:17:48,635 --> 00:17:49,734
I'm not a smoker.
392
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:52,470
I'm just... Larry!
393
00:17:54,606 --> 00:17:56,240
Oh, Titmouse -
394
00:17:56,242 --> 00:17:58,309
if you live, as
God is my witness,
395
00:17:58,311 --> 00:18:01,579
I promise I will be a
good and true conscience,
396
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:03,714
without ego,
without...
397
00:18:05,384 --> 00:18:07,752
You're alive!
398
00:18:07,754 --> 00:18:09,387
It's a miracle!
399
00:18:09,389 --> 00:18:12,457
You've saved me from my
own personal Armageddon
400
00:18:12,459 --> 00:18:14,192
and you deserve to be free!
401
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:15,693
You must be free!
402
00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:18,796
Fly, you winged, beautiful -
403
00:18:20,632 --> 00:18:22,300
Flightless bird.
404
00:18:26,238 --> 00:18:27,472
[honks horn]
405
00:18:27,474 --> 00:18:29,340
Ahh!
406
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:33,478
We could do this
all night, toots...
407
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,713
Or you call your
boy off my bar,
408
00:18:35,715 --> 00:18:37,682
then I show you
around the new place.
409
00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:39,117
Some decent booze.
410
00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:40,685
You can grill up
a coupla steaks.
411
00:18:40,687 --> 00:18:42,687
You're amazing, Fitz.
412
00:18:42,689 --> 00:18:44,856
Really one of a kind.
413
00:18:44,858 --> 00:18:46,657
That sounds like a yes to me.
414
00:18:46,659 --> 00:18:48,426
You may be able to sell lemons
415
00:18:48,428 --> 00:18:50,428
to cougars and geriatrics
416
00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:52,563
but you don't know how
these people operate.
417
00:18:52,565 --> 00:18:55,299
Trust me - you're out
of your league.
418
00:18:57,503 --> 00:18:59,203
Like hell I am.
419
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,340
[snaps fingers]
420
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:04,242
Ladies room.
Five minutes.
421
00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:05,576
Oh, Fitzy,
you're cute and all,
422
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:06,911
but I'm super hot
and ambitious.
423
00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:08,179
And this is City Hall.
424
00:19:08,181 --> 00:19:11,315
I don't do civilians.
425
00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,365
Richard, you look upset,
are you okay?
426
00:19:26,367 --> 00:19:27,365
Great! Awesome!
427
00:19:27,367 --> 00:19:29,700
Let's just get in
the car and drive.
428
00:19:29,702 --> 00:19:31,269
You have my keys, dick-jam.
429
00:19:31,271 --> 00:19:32,670
Oh, nice.
430
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:34,438
You were just going
to ditch me in there?
431
00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:37,675
The endangered titmouse
is protected by federal law,
432
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:39,310
and I killed it!
433
00:19:39,312 --> 00:19:40,645
You killed the fucking bird?
434
00:19:40,647 --> 00:19:41,946
What kind of a
conscience are you?
435
00:19:41,948 --> 00:19:44,182
Now is not the time
for more Larry bashing.
436
00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:46,884
Nobody's more
critical of me than me.
437
00:19:46,886 --> 00:19:48,319
Let's just get in
the car and drive
438
00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:50,188
before Chester
calls the authorities.
439
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,690
And let that eunuch get in
the way of Fitz's dream?
440
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,325
Ooo, my name is Dot
441
00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:55,660
and I have a manager's title
442
00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:57,261
and a point!
443
00:19:57,263 --> 00:20:02,633
Yes, I do have a point.
444
00:20:02,635 --> 00:20:05,436
The Fitz I know is
a low-life scumbag
445
00:20:05,438 --> 00:20:08,206
who lives his life
exactly the way he wants.
446
00:20:08,208 --> 00:20:09,674
Who cares if he's not married,
447
00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:11,709
has no real career and
a lot of excess skin
448
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,744
from losing a hundred
and thirty pounds!
449
00:20:13,746 --> 00:20:15,246
What the fuck?
450
00:20:15,248 --> 00:20:18,316
There may be only twelve
speckled titmice left -
451
00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:19,650
Eleven.
452
00:20:19,652 --> 00:20:23,387
But how many Richard
Fitzpatrick's are there?
453
00:20:23,389 --> 00:20:25,456
One.
454
00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:26,891
I'm an original.
455
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,726
Last of a dying breed.
456
00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:30,628
Stop encouraging him.
457
00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:36,500
Yeah, I'm
one of a kind...
458
00:20:36,502 --> 00:20:39,370
Ring a ding ding, baby.
459
00:20:39,372 --> 00:20:42,406
Ring a ding ding.
460
00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:43,641
[beep]
461
00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:45,743
Hey baby, if you reallythink I don't have
462
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,511
what it takes to playin the big leagues,
463
00:20:47,513 --> 00:20:50,481
then you won't need to comeby the Summerwind at 3 pm.
464
00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:51,849
And you won't bother bringing
465
00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:52,849
that wad of breaddough you married.
466
00:20:52,851 --> 00:20:56,454
I'd hate for you to find outhe broke your vows.
467
00:20:56,456 --> 00:20:57,788
And just so you know,
468
00:20:57,790 --> 00:21:00,491
I played with myselfwhile I left this message.
469
00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:02,360
And I'm still naked.
470
00:21:02,362 --> 00:21:04,262
[beep]
471
00:21:11,470 --> 00:21:12,970
Get your hands off me.
472
00:21:12,972 --> 00:21:14,472
Okay, but what about my idea
473
00:21:14,474 --> 00:21:16,472
to acknowledge the titmouse
474
00:21:16,474 --> 00:21:17,675
who sacrificed his
life for this moment?
475
00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:19,543
Yeah, whatever.
476
00:21:19,545 --> 00:21:21,612
Cameras here?
477
00:21:21,614 --> 00:21:23,714
I'll show her a plan.
478
00:21:23,716 --> 00:21:25,483
And where the fuck is Josh?
479
00:21:33,592 --> 00:21:37,495
Alibear, you said we
were going for fro-yo!
480
00:21:37,497 --> 00:21:39,363
Chester, did you
have anything to do
481
00:21:39,365 --> 00:21:41,699
with Fitz's bar closing?
482
00:21:41,701 --> 00:21:43,768
What? No.
483
00:21:43,770 --> 00:21:45,703
That's... ridiculous.
484
00:21:45,705 --> 00:21:49,473
Good, then you shouldn't have
any trouble hearing him out.
485
00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:51,876
You had your day on stage.
486
00:21:51,878 --> 00:21:54,378
It's only fair that
he should have his.
487
00:21:54,380 --> 00:21:56,380
They killed my bird!
488
00:21:56,382 --> 00:21:58,349
Okay.
489
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:03,854
Hey,
thanks for making it.
490
00:22:03,856 --> 00:22:05,723
You seem to have
found your clothes.
491
00:22:05,725 --> 00:22:07,458
Easy to lose, baby.
492
00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:09,860
Don't make me resent you
any more than I already do.
493
00:22:09,862 --> 00:22:11,062
Resent me?
494
00:22:11,064 --> 00:22:13,464
Why would you resent me?
495
00:22:23,041 --> 00:22:25,943
You should really lay off
the bar snacks, Toots.
496
00:22:25,945 --> 00:22:28,346
Richard, let's do this!
497
00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:31,549
Speech.
Colour coded.
498
00:22:31,551 --> 00:22:33,417
Inspirational doodles
in the margins.
499
00:22:33,419 --> 00:22:34,752
Richard!
500
00:22:46,698 --> 00:22:51,535
Uh, you probably heard of me.
501
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:52,870
I'm Fitz.
502
00:22:52,872 --> 00:22:54,905
Richard Fitzpatrick.
503
00:22:54,907 --> 00:22:58,709
Hottest pre-owned car
salesman this side of Detroit.
504
00:22:58,711 --> 00:23:01,379
I'm also a pistol in the sack,
505
00:23:01,381 --> 00:23:04,048
and no, I won't remember
your name in the morning.
506
00:23:04,050 --> 00:23:05,583
That's not what I wrote.
507
00:23:05,585 --> 00:23:07,952
But you know what
I will remember?
508
00:23:07,954 --> 00:23:09,887
Your favourite brand of gin.
509
00:23:09,889 --> 00:23:11,622
How you like your steak.
510
00:23:11,624 --> 00:23:13,391
And I'll never sit
your mistress
511
00:23:13,393 --> 00:23:14,759
and your wife
at the same table.
512
00:23:14,761 --> 00:23:16,494
You wanna know why?
513
00:23:16,496 --> 00:23:18,696
Because I'm the
last of a breed.
514
00:23:18,698 --> 00:23:21,165
As a friend once said -
515
00:23:21,167 --> 00:23:22,900
One of a kind.
516
00:23:22,902 --> 00:23:26,504
Bla bla blah...
517
00:23:28,874 --> 00:23:31,709
Fuck the titmouse.
518
00:23:31,711 --> 00:23:33,043
Me and my buddies
519
00:23:33,045 --> 00:23:35,880
are the species that
need to be protected.
520
00:23:35,882 --> 00:23:38,549
We need a natural habitat,
521
00:23:38,551 --> 00:23:40,484
a place to call our own,
522
00:23:40,486 --> 00:23:42,052
a place where we're safe.
523
00:23:42,054 --> 00:23:43,988
A place off your streets
524
00:23:43,990 --> 00:23:45,756
where we can listen to Frank
525
00:23:45,758 --> 00:23:47,925
and get our drink on.
526
00:23:47,927 --> 00:23:51,529
But Chester Vince doesn't
think we deserve that.
527
00:23:51,531 --> 00:23:54,698
He wants to shut me down.
528
00:23:54,700 --> 00:24:00,905
Invisibility...
the ultimate weapon!
529
00:24:00,907 --> 00:24:02,640
You want leadership?
530
00:24:02,642 --> 00:24:05,810
The line starts behind me.
531
00:24:05,812 --> 00:24:08,078
You want sex appeal?
Boom.
532
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:09,914
You want protection
from the enemy?
533
00:24:09,916 --> 00:24:14,218
I'm your man, not that
pussy Chester Vince.
534
00:24:14,220 --> 00:24:15,686
This is good...
He wants progress?
535
00:24:15,688 --> 00:24:17,455
I want to live.
536
00:24:17,457 --> 00:24:19,690
And have a good time doing it.
537
00:24:19,692 --> 00:24:22,493
Fuck parking
tickets and by-laws.
538
00:24:22,495 --> 00:24:24,795
Let's make this
city fun again.
539
00:24:24,797 --> 00:24:26,464
[cheering]
540
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:29,800
Richard Fitzpatrick isn't
just a used car salesman.
541
00:24:29,802 --> 00:24:31,469
And a bar owner.
542
00:24:31,471 --> 00:24:33,237
I'm a fucking leader.
543
00:24:33,239 --> 00:24:35,840
And that's why I'm
running for city council!
544
00:24:35,842 --> 00:24:39,643
[cheering]
545
00:24:39,645 --> 00:24:42,646
That's right.This is my city.
546
00:24:42,648 --> 00:24:45,015
And this is my party, baby.
547
00:24:45,017 --> 00:24:49,653
Because with Fitz on
council, everyday is open bar!
548
00:24:49,655 --> 00:24:56,160
Fitz! Fitz! Fitz!
549
00:24:56,162 --> 00:24:58,762
Nothing can stop
us now, Buddy!
550
00:24:58,764 --> 00:25:01,031
Oh, no you don't,
Richard Fitzpatrick.
551
00:25:01,033 --> 00:25:04,034
That is my seat in Council.
Mine!
552
00:25:04,036 --> 00:25:08,205
Chester no -
Calm down -
553
00:25:08,207 --> 00:25:10,207
Chester!Come back!
554
00:25:13,144 --> 00:25:15,546
[screaming]
555
00:25:15,548 --> 00:25:17,781
You can see me?
All of you!
556
00:25:17,783 --> 00:25:18,916
Oh, for fu--!
557
00:25:18,918 --> 00:25:21,952
[engine starts]
558
00:25:21,954 --> 00:25:24,021
Stop this thing!
Stop doing that!
559
00:25:24,023 --> 00:25:26,657
Can't stop it!
Dynamite stuck in the -
560
00:25:26,659 --> 00:25:35,799
[screaming]
561
00:25:35,801 --> 00:25:37,735
Oh God!
I'm sorry, Vincent!
562
00:25:37,737 --> 00:25:39,537
Chester!
563
00:25:39,539 --> 00:25:42,006
[screaming]
564
00:25:42,008 --> 00:25:43,807
I'm so sorry Vincent!
565
00:25:43,809 --> 00:25:45,776
I'm so sorry!
566
00:25:45,778 --> 00:25:48,746
What the fuck, Josh!
Not my bar!
567
00:25:48,748 --> 00:25:50,314
[screaming]
568
00:25:50,316 --> 00:25:54,685
Fuck!
569
00:25:54,687 --> 00:25:56,220
Reporting livefrom the Summerwind Lounge,
570
00:25:56,222 --> 00:25:58,789
where local businessmanRichard Fitzpatrick
571
00:25:58,791 --> 00:26:00,591
has once againdriven an honest man
572
00:26:00,593 --> 00:26:02,126
to the depthsof depravity.
573
00:26:03,762 --> 00:26:06,030
City Council?We'll see...
574
00:26:06,032 --> 00:26:08,799
This is Melody Gray!
575
00:26:08,801 --> 00:26:10,334
This is most fortunate.
576
00:26:10,336 --> 00:26:12,603
Fitzpatrick scum gets
what he deserves.
577
00:26:12,605 --> 00:26:14,071
And now that he is
running for office,
578
00:26:14,073 --> 00:26:18,709
we will not see his face
around here ever, ever again.
579
00:26:18,711 --> 00:26:20,277
Booyah!
580
00:26:25,984 --> 00:26:28,886
Richard, like the
death of the titmouse,
581
00:26:28,888 --> 00:26:30,921
the destruction of
your life-long dream
582
00:26:30,923 --> 00:26:33,991
is merely a small setback
on our path to greater glory.
583
00:26:33,993 --> 00:26:35,926
Shut the fuck up, Larry.
584
00:26:37,696 --> 00:26:40,764
Campaign office.
Back garage. Now.
585
00:26:40,766 --> 00:26:42,666
I'm going because
I have to pee.
586
00:26:42,668 --> 00:26:45,035
Not because you're
the boss of me.
587
00:26:48,273 --> 00:26:49,907
You going to help me
win this thing?
588
00:26:49,909 --> 00:26:51,609
Oh, Fitz.
589
00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:54,044
Everyone knows it's the
woman behind the man
590
00:26:54,046 --> 00:26:56,814
who holds the cards.
591
00:26:56,816 --> 00:26:59,350
You're going to win it for me,
592
00:26:59,352 --> 00:27:02,286
it's my new long term plan.
593
00:27:02,288 --> 00:27:04,888
Whatever gets you wet.
594
00:27:04,890 --> 00:27:06,957
Not a chance in hell, Cowboy.
595
00:27:24,876 --> 00:27:26,944
[clears throat]
596
00:27:26,946 --> 00:27:30,681
2500 under book
and a test ride?
597
00:27:30,683 --> 00:27:33,217
You got my vote,
Councillor.
598
00:27:38,323 --> 00:27:40,691
And, he's back.
599
00:27:47,799 --> 00:27:50,734
How about I show you
my election platform?
600
00:27:50,736 --> 00:27:52,102
[giggles]
Okay.
601
00:27:52,104 --> 00:27:53,404
[zipper]
602
00:27:53,406 --> 00:27:54,772
There it is.
603
00:27:54,774 --> 00:27:56,440
What do you think of that?
Yeah?
604
00:27:56,442 --> 00:27:58,676
[giggles]
605
00:27:58,678 --> 00:28:00,444
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
606
00:28:00,446 --> 00:28:01,979
Vote Fitz, baby.
607
00:28:01,981 --> 00:28:07,084
Fitz for City Council!
608
00:28:07,086 --> 00:28:09,153
Oooh!
Yeah!
49058
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