All language subtitles for trivia_s02e02

You're going to be so much more than my
living gentleman friend.

Yeah? You'll be that fella that pays the
bills, too.

It's nice talking to you, Adam. Yeah, me
too.

I'll be closing the video shop as soon
as possible.

You're fired, Lawrence.

Fired. Remember we talked about putting
some of the utilities in your name? I'm

supposed to be keeping us afloat until
she's finished her paramedic training.

Yes, I know about the plan. All I have
to do is get another job before she

out to flick Shaggy's shot.

This is insane.

I'm not saying I won't have to do a lot
of lying and sneaking around.

So,

I haven't had any direct supermarket
experience, per se, except for being a

customer, of course.

But I've always thought it was a
fascinating world.

Are you trying to be funny?

No.

All the selling, tidying up, briquettes
over there.

There's so much going on.

I'd love to see backstage, as it were.

Well, take it all in.

Anyway, let's cut to the chase.

Tell me, Lawrence, what do you consider
to be your greatest strengths?

Strengths? Let me see.

Well, I'm good, very good, if I say so
myself, on general knowledge.

General knowledge?

Well, if you want me to be more
specific, I'm particularly strong on

kings and queens of England, and the
real names of celebrities who use fake

names.

Anything else you'd like to list as a
strength?

I would say I'm good with people,
provided they're not morons.

And I've got nice handwriting.

Yeah.

What about weaknesses?

Weaknesses? Me?

No, no.

No. No weaknesses?

Oh, come on, Lawrence. We all have
weaknesses. It's a very standard

Is it? Yeah. Oh.

Well, I don't like working under any
kind of pressure.

I much prefer things to be slow and
easy. The less hassle, the better. Ah.

Anything else?

I have a lifelong fear of wasps.

Really? Yeah. No time for them.

Tell me, where do you see yourself in
five years' time?

With any luck, I'll still be stacking
shelves here.

I'm not going to lie to you, Lawrence.
That doesn't sound like it went as well

as it might have. Yeah, I know.

Did you mention about being passionate,
like I told you?

Employers love to hear the word passion.
No, I forgot.

Okay,

lack of preparation.

Here's what I think the problem is. I
blame myself.

Yeah, so do I.

Right, I'm on my way back to your place
to... Hide?

I was trying to think of a better word
for it, but yes, to hide.

Hey, Lawrence, how's it going?

Too bad about the flick shack?

Listen, if you happen to bump into
Molly, don't mention to her. She's very

about the whole thing, way more than I
am, even.

Oh, God, love her.

But you'll be fine. You'll find
something.

Like a man of your... You'll find
something. Thanks, Tara. If you do

hear anything, anything at all, no
matter how disgusting or dangerous, let

know. No bother.

Right, this better be good. I would rest
rehearsal now.

Oh, yeah?

What's the show?

Seven brides for seven brothers, but
there wasn't enough boys and I was the

one in, so I'm playing a fecking
brother.

It's good to be stretched, I suppose.

Yeah.

So, listen, this flatmate of yours,
Ruth, we went for breakfast the other

morning. I'm sure she mentioned it.

No.

Well, anyway, we had a nice little chat
and I got to thinking... I don't know if

you're a type, the whole older guy thing
and everything.

OK, Adam.

What do you want, her phone number? Her
second name for Facebook stalking?

Yeah, I'd prefer the personal, don't
you? She works in Air Force One.

Thank you. You're a pal.

Can I go now?

With my very best wishes.

Lots of luck.

Who is?

Oh, hi, Adam.

Hi, Siobhan.

Hi. This is the bride.

Yeah.

Did I have a word?

Yeah.

Okay. I was just passing by.

Oh, just passing by, were you?

Yeah. And how did you know where I
worked?

I asked Tara.

Oh, right.

And then I made a point of passing by.

Interesting.

Anyway, do you fancy going to the park
for a bit of lunch?

Er... Well,

you'd have to give me about 20 minutes
here, I'd say.

Oh, you go on. We're nearly done.

Mary can finish me off. Are you sure?

Yeah.

Yeah, OK, then. Lunch at the park would
be lovely. Thank you.

OK. I'll see you outside.

Yeah.

Thank you, Siobhan. See you.

Not now, no.

How long do you think those two have
been together?

25 years, maybe?

30? If they still come to the park every
day for lunch, it kind of gives you

hope, doesn't it?

You think so?

Oh, you don't?

I'd say they're both married to other
people, and this is the only time they

to spend alone.

I'd say you watch too many soap operas.

Right, well, I asked them. I believe you
would. I would, yeah.

Please don't. No, love.

No, I'm stuck in the office.

Bedroom here.

Now, that's just spooky.

How did you manage that?

I'm a hairdresser. We know these things.

Do we have to watch yet another
programme about the economy?

I get it.

It's ruined. Well, the simple way out of
this horrible situation would be to go

to bed, like I asked you half an hour
ago.

Oh, there's the working man.

How'd you go on today?

Good. Do you know what we practised
injections on? I was surprised. Do not

me.

I'm going to say melon.

Yes, aren't you? Aren't you?

Yep, yep. Makes sense.

Are you watching this? I recorded a
university challenge earlier.

Are you sure you don't miss in the pub
quiz, Lawrence?

Yes, Aisling, I'm sure.

We were learning about drug addiction in
school the other day.

There's this thing called methadone. All
right, Aisling, that's enough. Bedtime.

Going, I'm going.

By the way, there's a school trip coming
up. They announced it today.

Paris. Loads of my friends are going
there. Sorry, Ashley, we can't afford

sort of thing. Not just now.

It's not even dear.

It doesn't matter. We can't afford it.
Welcome to your mother, Ashley.

So what?

Are we flat broke?

Is that what you're saying? Well, we're
not going to starve, but we're not going

shopping for boats anytime soon.

Look, we've got each other, and that's
the main thing, isn't it? So long as we

have Lawrence's little bit of money
coming in, we should consider ourselves

lucky and... Go on and so forth.

She never lets me finish a speech.

Getting into that one.

Excuse me, what's this?

What's what?

What are you doing with the clothes?

Oh, this?

This is the system I have with my
mother.

System?

Really?

Yeah.

It saves me having to wait for a big
wash to be done on the phone. I need a

garment or two in a hurry.

I leave them highly visible in the
appropriate place so she doesn't...

So you won't miss them.

Lawrence, come here.

Yeah?

Come here.

I am not your mammy and I am not your
maid.

If you leave me little jobs to do that
you could easily do yourself, I will

punch you in the throat while you sleep.

Are we clear?

Well, I don't know. I will teach you.

It would be my pleasure.

So, Lawrence, tell me everything you
know about what we do here.

Established in 2007, Nutcracker Finance
is a leading provider of loan

consolidation and short -time financial
solutions.

You're 100 % Irish -owned, and being
Irish, you're ideally placed... That's

our website.

Forbatham. You just learned it off by
heart.

Excuse me?

I have a lot of passion for jobs, for
doing jobs.

I passionately would like you to give me
this job, please. Lawrence, I have to

find two dozen new people in a real
hurry.

Now, I could sit here and give you the
whole spiel about self -starter this and

team player that, but you seem like a
decent skin.

This is pretty simple phone work we're
talking about.

A reasonably smart gorilla could do it.

Maybe even a chimp.

Now, are you as smart as Reno? You've
got that backwards.

I'm sorry.

Chimps and gorillas. Chimps are smarter.

Don't get me wrong. Gorillas are
intelligent animals.

But chimps use tools. They can be
taught... Lauren!

Lauren! Lauren!

It's just a metaphor.

It's a simile, not a metaphor, but to
answer your question, yes, I'm easily

intellectual equal of any of the great
apes.

Good for you.

In that case, welcome aboard.

Really?

This is great. This is just fantastic.

Molly will be delighted.

She's my girlfriend.

I've got a girlfriend. Super.

Now, there'll be a one -month probation
period, of course, at the end of which

the position will be made permanent.

What? So you're saying I haven't really
got the job?

I'm saying you have really got the job
at the end of your one month's

A month, right. Now, I really have to
push on. Is there anything you'd like to

ask me before you go?

Yeah, the name Nutcracker Finance.

What's that about?

No financial nut is too difficult for us
to crack.

Gotcha.

So it's nothing to do with cracking
people's nuts if they don't pay the

back. No. Because I wouldn't be any good
at that. Of course not.

Listen,

thank you very much, really.

No problem.

Just in the dress code.

I can wait.

You got what?

The job?

Really? Yes.

Wow. What, was the guy drunk or what?
Ha, ha, ha.

Well, that's impressive.

That's what I'm always there.

I haven't told her yet.

You want more?

There's a one -month probation period
until that's behind me. Probation

mean anything, Lauren.

That's just in case you make a complete
ball of it. I don't want to tell Molly

I've probably got a job. I want to tell
her I've definitely got a job.

Suppose I tell her and then I get the
boot.

She'd be kicking the teeth twice.

I don't know about you. I only want her
kicking the teeth once.

Let's not kick her at all.

Exactly. What are we arguing about?

Starting in two minutes, people.

Why did you wait until the quiz was on
before you told me?

Adam, you're imagining things.

Round one, question one, coming up.
That's it, now that I am here.

Home. Aye.

Go home.

In which movie is a character called...
Hey, Ruth.

Thought this place was too fuddy -duddy
for a young whippersnapper like you.

Fuddy -duddy?

Whippersnapper? My God, has it talked
like a Victorian day again already?

Sorry? If I get too drunk, you're going
to take me home on your horse and

carriage.

Lawrence, this is Ruth. Ruth, Lawrence.

Lawrence, how do you do?

I do good.

Lawrence is just leaving.

Good night, all.

He's a little.

What can I get you to drink?

White wine, please. And no, I don't care
which kind.

OK.

Hi.

How are you?

We're just going to go up the back.
There's a quiz or something going on.

yeah, yeah.

Well, you know what? I think I'm going
to join you. You just don't give a damn,

do you?

Well, my confirmation name is Danger.

Yeah. Um, Katrina's just gone up there.
OK. Thanks.

So... Are they with you?

Oh, I think it's a bit more like I'm
with them.

She probably won't talk to them then.
Probably should, yeah.

There you go, keep the change.

By the way, if you're planning to see
Seven Brides this week, my understudy

be in.

He's good, like.

But if you want to wait to see my
performance, the tickets can be

All right, then.

Round one.

Lawrence, say something.

Like what?

That's plenty.

I just wanted to check you were still
alive.

If you've got a dorsal pedal pulse, I
can't find it. Do the carrot head again.

love that one. No, I have to get this
right.

Listen, when do you start working
nights?

Oh, not for a few weeks. Why?

Maura was in the shop today. Turns out
she does have some ideas for the place.

She's convinced herself for some reason
that we should open at nine in the

morning. Oh, yeah?

Yeah, and she's promised some neighbours
to get a job there.

We're going to split the time.

I'll be doing nine to 5 .30.

It'll be weird, I suppose, but I'll get
used to it. I am not deadly.

There'll be someone here for Aisling
when I start doing mine.

Well, exactly.

Good morning, sir. Can I help you? Yes,
I'm starting work here today.

Well, training, anyway. I thought you
were coming important for a minute, with

the suit on and all.

Not that you're not important.

Sorry, that came out wrong.

Don't worry about it.

Well, you're very welcome.

You're very welcome, too.

I mean, thank you.

Can I take your name?

Lauren.

Lauren... L -A -W...

Laurence what?

Your second name? Sorry, Duffy.

Just a moment.

I'm Carol, by the way.

I'm really looking forward to meeting
everybody.

Hey.

This whole colleagues thing is new to
me.

I worked alone before.

Oh yeah, what was your old job?

I was an assassin.

Sorry, that was a joke.

I was in the film industry.

Is that a joke too?

Yeah, kind of.

This document forms the basis of our
sessions here.

As you can see, it's divided up into
four sections, the first of which is

guidelines. That's what we'll be
covering this morning. This afternoon,

move on to... Yes.

I was told this job could be done by a
chimp, maybe even a gorilla.

I don't like the sound of legal
guidelines.

I'm sorry, what's your name?

Lawrence Duffy.

And who did you interview with,
Lawrence?

Um, Desi something.

Desmond White.

I know him.

I think the obvious point here is that
you never, ever argue with a client. You

are polite and...

Softly spoken, and when it became clear
you were dealing with a person who

wasn't being reasonable, you ended the
call, but you signed off correctly.

You didn't just hang up.

And now who's next?

Hello?

Hello, this is Lawrence Duffy from
Nutcracker Finance.

I'm calling in regard to your recent...
You

contacted us about a financial loan.

Yes, yes, that's right.

Okay, I would like to... Everything's
just got on top of me lately.

So many bills.

Right. If we could just... Things have
gotten so bad, I've taken to drink.

I'm drunk right now.

Well, there's nothing wrong with having
an occasional drink now and again.

There isn't? No.

People have been producing alcoholic
drinks since Neolithic times.

Really? Yeah.

There were dedicated wineries at least 6
,000 years ago.

You could say it's part of being human.

So I'm willing to bet you'll feel a
whole lot

better once you get your lungs sorted
out. Hang on a second, Lawrence.

Can anyone see what's gone wrong here?

What?

Well...

We try not to sell loans to people who
are drunk when we talk to them.

Well, is that not the perfect time?

Lawrence? Yo.

Hang on a second.

So, listen.

How do you think that went?

It was great. It was really great.

I'm very passionate.

I don't doubt it for a second. However,
I have to be honest.

Lawrence, and tell you phone work might
not be for you. No, no, no, Jacinda, no,

please. I really need this job.
Lawrence, I know what I'm talking about.

Please. There's no way in hell I'm
letting you loose on our phones.

However, there may be other options.

How's your typing?

Not great. Two fingers.

Maybe a not thumb.

I'm trying to do you a favour here,
Lawrence. I'll ask again.

How's your typing?

Two fingers, but a very fat two fingers.

And frequent thumbs. Excellent. How do
you like the sound of client profile

acquisition? Love it. What is it?

Data entry.

Fiona, I have a guy I'm going to send
down to see you.

Lauren Stuffy.

Hang on now.

Around the back.

Oh, I let it go.

Give me a second.

You going anywhere nice on your
holidays?

Maybe it'd be better if I stood still
and you rotated.

I know.

How's that?

Comfortable?

Better.

As if it's a real sprain wrist.

I don't think I'd have been so patient.

Do you see what I did there?

Good one.

Molly, hey, how's it going?

Is everything okay? Shouldn't you be in
class?

No, we got out early. I told you about
it last night. You grunted.

Right. Anyway, I could do with a bit of
cheering up.

Can I stop by for a visit?

Sure,

that sounds great.

Are you far away?

No, I'm just going to park in Adams.

What? At the Blue Swan.

In five minutes.

Lovely, bye.

Are you okay?

Here, let me get this for you.

Sorry. Be careful, will you? I'm really
sorry. I hope you're going.

Hiya.

I didn't see you there. It was miles
away.

Are you locking the whole place up?

Yeah. I've had enough of that.

Coffee? Yeah.

Can I, yeah?

Oh, yeah.