Original subtitles

Welcome to Spanish Club. Today's agenda, discussing the tango, artist Frida

Kahlo, and recap of last night's Latin American soccer scores.

Everybody tied!

Florence, as a proud Latino, allow me to say, I don't care about any of that

junk. When do we eat?

After we take attendance.

Tamika, aquí.

Freddy, aquí.

Clark? It's pronounced Clark.

which I would expect the president of the Spanish club to know, even though he

only beat me by one vote.

A win's a win, Clark.

Not even close.

You will never have the R -rolling skills of Clark Rodriguez.

Your last name's O'Shannon.

Okay, next is...

What's going on?

He has a huge crush on Esme. He can't even talk when he's around her. Getting

nervous around a girl? It's a thing?

Es... Es... Es... Es... Esme's here!

What's at the snack table, amigo?

Nacho time.

Helping your friend time.

I don't understand why you don't just talk to Esme already, Lawrence.

What if she doesn't like me? How could she not like you? You're Spanish Club's

hombre of the month.

Either way, go for it.

I can't.

Whenever I try to talk to her, I get so nervous I start sweating. How bad could

it be?

Hombre up.

Oh, hi, Esme.

That's a really nice nose you're wearing.

Um, thank?

I got it from my parents.

Sure is a hot one today.

Huh? I'm cold, actually.

The weather guy said we're going to hit a record low. Well, how about that?

I love weather.

Well, bye.

See? That wasn't so bad.

You think you're going to lose your cool?

Well, sometimes you've got to break the rule.

Hey, show me what you know. Give it up to rock and roll, because we ain't going

to stop.

If you're feeling like you're getting sore, there's enough to write in front

you. Hey, show me what you know. Give it up to rock and roll, because we ain't

going to stop.

Hey, are you ready to love?

All right, let's do this. One, two. Hang on a sec, Mr. Finn.

Freddy, I think your drums sounded a little off yesterday. You should test

out. What? My drums sound fine.

Milk?

Nice one, dude.

You got it.

Okay, we're trying to see who can pull the most epic band prank.

Guys, we don't have time for pranks. We really need to rehearse.

What the... Chocolate syrup?

Enough. Battle of the Bands is two weeks away, and we need every bit of practice

we can get.

Plus, I have to rent a new amp, I have to grade your midterm papers, which

apparently means I have to read your midterm papers, and I lost the keys to

van.

Mr. Finn, you've got... A lot to do, I know.

So let's just get some rehearsal in before you have to go.

We have to go.

What?

to class now. Do you know the real one that school makes us go to?

Fine, go. But we're rehearsing after school today and every day until Battle

the Bands.

And Freddie, clean that milk off your tie.

Take some pride in your appearance, buddy.

You've all gotten so good.

It's like you're getting together and secretly playing music.

What?

That's crazy.

Run amidst your bedroom and burn everything.

Burn it to the ground.

Take a breath, Sparky.

I'm curious.

How much do you kids know about music from ancient times?

You mean like the 80s? My mom makes me listen to Journey in the car.

No. I mean the music prehistoric man played. I am an avid collector of

primeval instruments.

This isn't an instrument. It's bone.

But if you smack them together, you've got some prehistoric percussion.

The guy just takes a caveman.

You don't bang on that. That would be disgusting.

You blow into the eye hole.

Gotcha.

Which hole do I vomit in?

Let's see what you can do.

I

think

I just found my new band.

The way it's wanted to form a band that plays this kind of music, and I think my

dream might finally be coming true.

Well, if it's optional. Not optional. We'll have our first practice after

today, and if that goes well, we'll practice every day.

But we have to practice with Mr. Finn after school every day. Don't worry,

get us out of it. I'll just turn on the Freddy charm.

Uh, Miss Ibsen?

I gave it all

I had.

Come here. You're going to love this.

It's showtime.

Are you finally going to tell Esme you like her?

What? No.

I've got a way better plan.

Why risk talking to her and getting rejected when I can do it the easy way?

Wow.

What's the hard way?

Now all Esme has to do is walk over and tell me how much she likes me.

But she doesn't know the birds were from you.

I'm not sure you've thought this through.

Tamika, please.

I fit 50 wild birds into a cramped locker.

I'm pretty sure I thought it through.

Good thing I didn't go with the wild raccoons.

Tamika, save yourself!

Go on without me!

Wait on him, you bird boy!

What are we going to do about musical? I can't handle that weird ancient

windbag. Don't talk about Miss Ibsen that way. I was talking about this

windbag.

That sounds like Esme's laugh.

What? It's cute when she does it.

We can't miss Mr. Finn's practice.

You saw how worked up he got this morning.

I think we told the truth.

He'll understand.

Besides, I've been working on my skulling. I'm getting good.

The key is jamming your thumb in the nose hole.

The other key is hand sanitizer.

We can't go running to Mr. Finn to fix this problem for us. He's already got

much on his plate.

So we'll handle this ourselves.

Why can't we be the adults? Yeah, we're responsible.

We make a decision.

I'm going to mustache.

Are you going in on someone else's face?

The point is, we can do this.

So agreed, we can do it. All we need is a plan.

What if we go to Miss Ibsen's practice, but we play terribly, like crazy bad?

She'll realize we're not her dream band and call it the whole thing.

That's perfect.

In the meantime, we just need to make up excuses and tell Mr. Finn why we can't

rehearse today.

Hey, guys.

What you talking about?

Nothing. I mean, something, of course. You can't talk about nothing or else

you're talking about something. Help.

Lawrence. Are you okay?

No, he is super sick. Mr. Finn, you should go home. I'm not sick.

It's worse than we thought.

One of the symptoms is thinking you're not sick. I don't think I'm sick either.

Oh, no.

It's spreading.

This is really bad, Mr. Finn. I think we all have to miss today's rehearsal.

Mr. Finn. Mr. Finn.

Rehearsal's off.

I'll just teach you from here.

Open your books to page 87.

Wow.

We sound pretty bad.

Thanks, Siddy. We understand you don't want us to be in your band, Miss Ibsen.

This was a horrible mistake.

Really? We should have formed this band at the beginning of the school year.

Oops. Sorry.

That song moved me.

Nobody knows what early man's music sounded like, so it's open to

interpretation. Your music made me feel like a cavewoman running from a saber

-toothed tiger.

That's how I feel when I give my cat a bath.

This is so exciting.

We're setting up a concert this week for the entire school.

Our plan isn't working. We can't be in her band and School of Rock.

Don't panic. I got this.

Uh, Miss Ibsen?

I can't even make my face smile. Everything is falling apart.

We should also invite Principal Mullins to the concert. We need her approval in

order to be an official band.

And then we'll have more concerts and more rehearsals. From now on, this band

going to be your life.

Zach,

stop playing that windbag.

I wasn't.

you going to do? This ancient band is going to ruin our lives. Nothing good

from ancient music. Everyone who ever played it is dead.

How could this get any worse?

Your teacher could catch you?

Yeah, but that's unlikely.

Mr. Finn's not the smartest.

Mr. Finn! We were just talking about you.

Sorry

we

lied to you, Mr. Finn.

We were just trying to deal with this on our own.

Well, that didn't work.

And now I've got a concert to stop.

Oh, why did this have to happen now? We've got so much going on.

Don't worry.

I'll deal with it.

Looking for Dewey Finn?

Oh, good. The amp delivery.

Lamps! I said amps!

What kind of store do you guys run?

Lamp store.

This is another thing I've got to sort out.

I'll be fine.

Excuse me.

I hate my life!

You guys, I don't think Mr. Finn can handle our problem right now.

We need to fix this Ipsen thing ourselves.

I don't know.

Maybe Mr. Finn will be able to figure this out. I can't figure anything out!

Yeah, let's fix it ourselves.

Look at her.

Everything she does is magical.

Oh, to be that hanky.

This has gone on long enough.

I'm finally going to tell Esme how I feel.

You go, Lawrence.

I'm proud of you for being brave and talking to her.

Oh, I'm not going to talk to her.

would do that.

I did!

I am an amazing person!

What? Thank you so much, Clark. That's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for

me.

Really,

you made that light show.

Why don't you prove it and do another light show right now?

Please. Another light show would be pathetic.

Right, Esme?

I guess.

This ancient music band? Go away for good.

Miss, it's just that Principal Mullins needs to sign off on the band to make it

official, right? Well, what does Principal Mullins hate more than

the world?

The laughter of children?

No, she hates when things aren't perfect. She totally flips out.

Which is why she will freak when she sees this.

Okay, this is us.

How come I'm a girl?

How are we there? We're not a guy mannequins.

How come you can't be the girl? Dude, come on.

So the plan is mannequins?

No, the plan is booby traps.

Better get out of the way.

Whoa, cannon.

At the concert, those will be flying tomatoes.

And for the finale.

At the concert, that'll be paint.

Principal Maltz will hate the concert so much, she'll shut the ancient music

band down.

And Mr. Finn will be impressed that we handled it on our own like grown -ups.

It's the perfect plan.

This is why we practice, people.

Why are you eating lunch in here, buddy?

I couldn't stand watching Esme eat with Clark.

Everything I've done to make her like me has gone wrong.

This would be a good time to say, don't worry, everything's going to be okay.

Everything's not going to be okay.

Wow, Mr. Finn. Your pep talks have taken a really sinister turn.

I mean, not until you tell Esme how you feel.

No more gestures.

You've got to stand in front of her, look her in the eye, say the words.

Look, Lawrence, you're an amazing guy.

Slow down. This is good stuff.

Esme, you're an amazing guy.

Gotta be your words, pal.

I know it's scary, but if you don't take the risk, you'll never know if she

likes you back.

You're right.

Thanks, Mr. Finn.

Anytime. It's what I'm here for.

Thank you for coming, Principal Mullins. I promise you are going to love these

kids and want them to be an official school band. Well, they're kids.

I'm not asking for perfection.

I expect it, but I'd never ask for it.

Guy, about the concert. Don't worry, Mr. Finn. We're handling it.

I don't know why we're laughing.

Well, we booby -trapped the stage. The concert's going to be a disaster.

Principal Mullins will hate it and end the band.

Isn't that a great plan?

No, it's a terrible plan.

What was going through your head?

Well, we saw how busy you were. We had to do something.

So we decided to be the adults and take care of this ourselves.

Yeah, we're practically grown -ups. Have you seen Zach's mustache?

Stop.

Guys, you're not grown -ups.

I'm the grown -up. It's okay to ask grown -ups for help. Even if I seem

I'm never too busy for you.

In fact, I... Excuse me, everybody. We've got a special performance for you.

Before the show starts, I'd like to sing a song I wrote for the coolest,

smartest, prettiest girl I know.

It's called Esme.

Just to be clear, it's about you, Esme.

And this is how I feel.

I wanted to tell you something So I tried way after way

But I just can't hide what I kept inside So

here's what I wanted to say You

make me smile

Make my whole day worthwhile.

No, the booby traps.

Don't worry, Mr. Finn. As long as nobody trips the Y.

I think I just tripped the Y.

We've got to see Lawrence.

It's a big tomato cannon. Don't worry.

I need the bit, but I don't mind, because you're sunny.

I guess the show's over.

Oh, no, no. I wanted to hear this ancient music.

I guess we blew it. We do.

I'm Hans Glassmeyer from the National Museum of Modern Prehistory, also known

Enememempa.

This school is using ancient artifacts as musical instruments, a direct

violation of the Federal Fossil Fragment Preservation Act.

Or... Excuse me.

Miss Simpson?

You're violating... I just liked the music. I didn't know we weren't

allowed to... I have a court injunction ordering you to shut this band down.

Children, I'm sorry. Your band has to break up.

You want to pay me right now, bro, or you want to meet me late night at the

graveyard? Just go, Gab.

You did this?

Told you I was going to take care of it.

You have a friend named Gab?

I have two, actually.

That song was so cool, Lawrence.

I'm proud of you, L -Train. Such a baller move, dude. If I'm ever into a

that much, I'm totally going to steal that idea.

I can't wait.

I mean, to hear how Esme liked the song.

I loved the song.

Oh, hi, Esme.

Did he mean all those things he said? Of course.

Good. Because I like you, too.