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Oh, come on, Bubba.
You really think that Riley can take Johnson?
Are you crazy?
Johnson will take him in the first round.
Yeah. Oh, really?
Well, put your money where your mouth is.
That's big enough to hold your money while it in your checkbook.
Oh,
how much?
Oh, come on.
And double that.
Now you're talking. Two dollars, you got it.
Right. Okay, see you later.
Oh, got two big ones.
Hey, Grady.
I'm in the kitchen, am I?
Well, come on out here. I've got somebody I want you to meet. Well, don't
A president shouldn't shout from room to room.
If a president has something to say to a president in another room, that
president should walk in there and say it.
The trouble with you young folks is you'd rather shout your way through life
than to walk.
Would you come on out here? I got somebody I want you to meet.
Yeah, all right.
Let me get this thing off.
You'll be right out, Herm. Are you sure he's not going to get upset about me
having been in jail?
Oh, no, man. Look, don't even worry about it. Grady's a pretty nice dude.
Speak up! You're talking to me!
Would you get out of here?
Uh, Grady, do you remember Earl Edwards?
Well, this is Earl's baby brother, Herman.
Herman, Grady Wilson.
How you doing? Hey, hi.
Herman, how you doing? Where's Earl?
Oh, Earl, he's just about getting ready to get into law school now.
Oh, wow. That's great. You know, we need more kids like you and Earl.
Not like some of these kids we got growing up today.
Grady, Herman's going to be staying with us for a while. Oh, boy. Why?
Well, because he doesn't have a place of his own. Oh, how come?
He spent the last two years in prison.
Just make yourself at home, Herman. Thanks, man.
Are you crazy bringing a killer into this house?
Grady Herman is not a killer.
Well, he's been to jail, hasn't he?
Yeah, he's been to jail. Well, he's a crook.
Now what?
Now stop it.
Now Herman is not a killer.
Well, how come he went to prison?
Because of circumstantial evidence, he just happened to be at the scene of a
crime. Oh, you just happened to be at the scene of a crime. What were you
there? Committing it.
Well, that's circumstantial evidence already.
Come on, Herman.
Now where are you taking this jailbird?
I'm taking him upstairs, Grady, and he's not a jailbird. He's got a name. Oh,
yeah? Spell it for me. Number by number.
Herman was arrested when he was 20 years old for stealing a hi -fi set. He spent
two years in prison, and he's paid his debt to society.
Oh, well, I ain't in society, so I haven't been paid yet.
Hey, look, Lamont, man, maybe I better split. I don't want no more hassles. No,
man, where you gonna go?
He ain't got no place to stay, Grady. He got kicked out of his apartment because
he couldn't pay the rent. Now, Herman is going to stay here with us until he
finds himself a job, and that's all there is to it. You got that?
Okay. I just happen to have a job for him.
Here, Herman, here's a quarter. Your job is to get out. Now, goodbye.
That's just what I need, having a crook around here.
See, I got him.
No,
he wouldn't want that.
Oh, wow, I can't let him get this.
Well, that's all I got to do is miss hearing that fight.
Especially when I've got two big ones riding on it.
Got to hide all the valuables.
Got to hide the valuables.
Boy,
that's some crook.
anything yet, Herman? No, not yet, man.
You put anything back?
Stop it.
Hey, man, here looks like a couple places I could try. Yeah, well, you just
right on trying, Herman. There's bound to be somebody in this town that'll give
you a job that don't care nothing about your past, man. Right.
Did you try the mafia?
Why don't you go in the kitchen and fix breakfast and stifle yourself?
I get it.
to the St. Louis Zoo.
Watch it, Grady.
And he was having a wonderful time.
Yeah. And he wished that I was there. Be careful.
And we're sure you already were.
Would you knock it off as soon as I knock him out? Would you just stop it?
Grady, stop it.
Stop it.
Now, come over here. I got somebody I want you to meet.
Honesta, this is Herman Edwards, and he's our house guest. Our big house
How you doing, ma 'am?
Uh, was that an automobile accident?
No, she was born with that face.
Shut up, fool.
Lamont, could you come over to help your Uncle Woody out today in the store? Oh,
gee, I'd love to, Aunt Esther, but I'm gonna be busy with the trucker all day
making pickups. And tonight, I promised Julio I'd go to the fights with him.
What happened to your regular helper?
Well, we had to fire him for stealing.
I could have forgiven him for anything else but stealing.
Thou shalt not steal.
That's one of the top ten.
Yes, ma 'am.
Oh, yeah, we can understand that.
Can't we, numbers?
I was hoping you'd be able to come and help him out today.
Wait a minute. Now, you say that Woody lost his helper, and Herman here is
looking for a job.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
You are?
Yes, ma 'am.
Do you know anything about the hardware business?
Well, I never had any... Oh, well, you don't have to worry nothing about that.
Herman here is very bright, and he picks up things very easily.
Where did you work before?
Well, you see, for the last two years, I've been... Worked for the state.
You did?
Well, uh, yes, ma 'am, and I... Never missed a day. Rain or shine, Herman was
always there.
Well, I... He was a waiter.
A waiter?
Yeah, he waited two years.
Why did you leave?
He was done serving.
Did you get the job on, Esther?
I have to get my husband's opinion. which shouldn't be very hard since he
it from me. In more ways than one. Wait a minute. Just a minute. Just a minute.
Would you excuse me for a minute?
Say, Lamont, can I rap to you for a minute, maybe? Yeah, yeah. Excuse me.
Oh, Grady, why don't you get something for Ernesto?
Oh, gladly. How much do you think I could get for him?
I don't think we should lie to your aunt like that, really.
Look, Herman, nobody's asking you to lie. Just don't volunteer any
that's not asked, all right? Oh, come on, man. That ain't no way to do
Okay, look at it this way. Would you tell anybody what your blood type was if
they didn't ask you? Well, of course not. All right, put your blood cell in
same category as your jail cell.
Okay, okay.
Well, I got to get back to the store to help my husband. Now, can I count on you
being there this afternoon?
Oh, yes, ma 'am. I'll be right down there. Just let me get my stuff.
Fine. Bye.
Bye. Well, you don't have to rush off now, do you? Yeah, why?
Well, I just like having you hang around out here.
It makes the junk look so pretty.
Grady Wilson, I wouldn't lower myself to even answer that because
I've got too much class.
What's the matter with you, Grady? What have you got against my Aunt Esther?
She talks too slow.
What do you mean she talks too slow? Well, she takes too much time between
and goodbye.
Well, at least she gave Herman a job.
Yeah, that's right. You know, and I owe her for that, for getting him out of the
house, because I was afraid he was going to attack me.
Would you stop that?
Well, no.
Really, I really get scared having a criminal in the house.
Grady, I'm going to tell you one more time. Herman is not a criminal.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Of course not.
I can see it now on my tombstone.
Here lies Grady Wilson, murdered in the first degree by a hell of a nice guy.
Say, Pops, uh... I want to thank you for letting me stay here last night and for
helping me get that job. Now I can afford to get my own place.
Oh, sure, sure, Herman. You know, the mom was right. Now a man must show
compassion and trust to his fellow man. Can I see what you got in that suitcase
there? Come on, Herman, get on.
Well,
I'll see you later, Brady. I'm going to pick up Hooligan. We're going to the
fights. Oh, well, you could take me to the fights, you know.
I could.
But the tickets cost ten bucks apiece.
Well, you could spend ten dollars on the man that cleans the house, washes the
clothes, and fixes your meals.
Sure. What time does he get here?
Bye.
Boy,
this is some dip.
Shrimp and ripple.
Shrimple.
Hey,
pops, will you come on downstairs? I didn't come here to rob nobody.
Well, what'd you come back for?
I got...
What, she caught you stealing again, right?
No, Pops, I wasn't stealing nothing. She just found out that I'm an ex -con.
Did you kill her?
Put your hands down, man.
Well, how'd she find out that you was an ex -con?
I told her.
Oh, well, she didn't fire you because you was an ex -con. She fired you
you were a fool.
Okay, Pops, anything you say.
And don't call me Pops.
ask me? I mean, I didn't want to lie to the lady. Well, what made her ask? Were
you singing old chain gang songs?
The fact is that she asked me some questions about my last job working for
state, and I told her the truth.
She must have passed out.
No, she just raised her arms to heaven and said, the truth will set you free.
And then she opened the door and freed me.
Okay, well...
You can stay for a while, but I'll take care of that later. But right now, I got
to listen to the fights. Come on, I'm going to lock you in the closet.
Oh, come on, man. You can trust me.
Well, I don't have to trust you.
Ain't none of my clothes in there.
I'll tell you what. I'll just sit right here.
On my hands.
All right, go on.
Both of them.
How'd you do it?
Do what?
Steal the radio. It's gone.
Hey, Bob, I didn't steal your radio.
Well, you're the only thief that's been here. You can't trust a thief for one
minute. The first chance he gets, he steals the freezer.
Hey,
you ain't going to hear nothing on that radio.
Julio's got a radio.
Come on, why don't you go over there and get it for me? Who's Julio?
He's our next door neighbor.
Well, why don't you go over there and listen to it with him? Well, he went to
the fight with Lamar.
Then how am I supposed to get his radio?
circumstantial evidence.
Well, you know, it's funny how you righteous dudes are only honest as long
it's convenient.
Look, come on, Herman. I don't need no philosopher now. I need the crook. Hey,
but man, look.
That's breaking and entering. You know, that's two to five.
No, no, no. It's ten to nine and the fight's about to start.
Uh, just a radio.
What took you so long? I mean, you must be out of practice.
Oh, man, I didn't want to break in and steal Julio's radio.
Where'd you get it from?
Martel's Appliance Store.
Martel? Are you crazy?
Stealing a radio from Martel's when they got color television?
Now, I dislike the thief, but I hate the dumb one.
in trouble, but Riley came on with a good flurry of hooks to the body towards
the end of the round.
Johnson now with a flurry of lefts to the right. He's got Riley on the road.
Yeah, we win it! We win it! That's right.
You sure know how to steal a radio.
We
figured
you had a final in mind. We left it.
Yeah, a terrible reception and the squad... kept picking up police calls.
You know... Hey, Dave, can you turn it up?
Oh, yeah, sure.
Come on, Dave.
What are you doing?
Hey, you know, that's very strange. You turned up the volume and changed the
station with the same knob.
Well, you see, that's how this radio works.
One of those buttons is for the brightness.
Boy, I tell you, he's a heck of a fighter, Riley. Come a long way from
Hey, Hoppy, Smitty. Hey, how are you? Hey, Herman, what you doing here? You
some trouble or something?
No, we stopped by to listen to the fight. Oh, how'd you get home so fast?
I didn't even get in, man. The fight was sold out. And besides, Johnson got
KO'd. I heard it on the radio in the truck.
Good thing he doesn't drive a squad car.
So how come you turned off the radio, Brady? Let's listen to the fight
interview, man.
In the kitchen, Lamar.
No, out here. Now give me the radio.
Come on.
Give it to me.
What are you doing with a brand new portable radio in your pocket?
Before you jump to any conclusions, this young man over here...
Did you give up the right to remain silent? Hold it, man. I didn't steal no
radio. All right, Mr. Wilson, you have the right to remain silent. Did you give
up the right to remain silent? Uh, uh, Hoppy. Hmm?
Remain silent.
Hey, Herman, what are they talking about?
I bought him that radio at Martell's, and he thinks I stole it.
Yeah, he bought it all right.
Yeah? Yeah, he bought it all right. Got a good buy, too, and that's good buy to
you. And it's time for us to divide.
That's split. Oh, split. Right.
Oh, oh, thanks.
Thanks, man.
Wow.
Hey, wait a minute, you.
You stole my watch.
Grady, it's on the other arm.
Oh, yeah.
How'd you do that?
College graduate.
College graduate.
College graduate.
Looks like Herman's going to have a hard time finding a job in this town.
Oh, hi, Aunt Esther. Don't you hire me.
Here's your mail. It was in the box. Take it. I need both hands free to
some gospel into your heart.
Well, why? What did I do? You lied to me about Herman. Well, I didn't exactly
lie. I played with the truth, but... Played with it?
Lamont, the truth is not a toy. You cannot play with the truth.
The truth is a hard, firm, ragged rock.
which is as old as the world itself.
The truth reminds me a lot of you, Lester.
Shut up, fool.
Well, you're right on, Lester. I did lie a little bit, but see, I figured if you
knew that Herman had been in prison that you wouldn't have given him a job. I
apologize. I didn't fire him because he was in prison.
I fired him because he didn't tell me he was in prison. Now, wait a minute. Now,
that wasn't Herman's fault. I told him not to tell you. Well, that's all in the
past. I'm willing to put everything behind me.
Looks like it's already there.
You will not arouse my wrath, Grady Wilson, because I came here filled with
mercy and to ask Herman to come back to work for me.
Oh, really?
Yes. Hey, Herman, I think you better get down here.
Hey, what's up, man? Hey, guess what? Honest is going to give you your job
Oh, really?
Really. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Well, I think that's wonderful, Honest.
That's straight out of the good book.
Well, hallelujah and goodbye. Now go straight out the good door.
Lastly, come on, honey.
We'll get you an apartment.
It's not good for ex -con to be associated with a known sucker.
Here's a letter for you, Grady. Oh, yeah? Open it up and read it. I don't
who would be writing me here.
It's a bill from Martell's Appliance Store for the radio.
It seems that Herman only made the down payment.
You owe the other eight.
I knew that crooked crook was crooked!
Once you've been on death row, you're not ever good for society again.
And I'll never forgive you and Esther for forgiving him or you for forgiving
or Martel for sending us.
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