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1
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Baby, here I stand before you with my
heart in my hand. I want you to read it,
2
00:01:01,470 --> 00:01:03,810
Mama, hoping that you'll understand.
3
00:01:04,370 --> 00:01:05,790
And that's the truth, baby.
4
00:01:06,470 --> 00:01:07,470
Wow!
5
00:01:08,450 --> 00:01:10,610
Well, you know I wouldn't lie.
6
00:01:11,710 --> 00:01:13,090
Hey, Pop, what you doing?
7
00:01:13,370 --> 00:01:18,070
Oh, I'm fixing a few snacks for later
on. See, I take a piece of bologna and
8
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wrap it around some cheese and onion and
garlic and call it The Lookaway.
9
00:01:25,420 --> 00:01:26,740
Well, why do you call it that?
10
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Because after eating one of them and go
to talk to somebody, they look away.
11
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,960
See, I got the recipe out of the food
section of the Sunday paper. See, here
12
00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:45,220
is right here. It says, tempt your guest
with this delicious appetizing horse
13
00:01:45,220 --> 00:01:46,220
diver.
14
00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:47,900
Wait a minute.
15
00:01:47,980 --> 00:01:49,080
Let me see that.
16
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:52,340
That's not horse diver. That's French.
17
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That's who is the ovary.
18
00:02:01,070 --> 00:02:03,250
You must be expecting some female
company tonight.
19
00:02:03,510 --> 00:02:05,630
No, just Grady's coming by to watch the
fights.
20
00:02:06,110 --> 00:02:08,410
Say, listen, son, you got any extra cash
on you?
21
00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:10,330
For what?
22
00:02:10,430 --> 00:02:14,830
Well, I need some money because Donna's
birthday is coming up, and I want to
23
00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:16,690
take her somewhere nice, somewhere
romantic.
24
00:02:17,170 --> 00:02:18,410
Oh, yeah? Like where?
25
00:02:18,810 --> 00:02:19,810
Disneyland.
26
00:02:22,070 --> 00:02:26,270
Disneyland? Yeah, see, she never been
there, and it's almost un -American not
27
00:02:26,270 --> 00:02:27,270
go to Disneyland.
28
00:02:27,350 --> 00:02:29,990
Yeah, but I'd like to know what's so
romantic about Disneyland.
29
00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:32,380
The Disneyland Motel.
30
00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:40,280
You a dirty old man, you know that?
31
00:02:41,300 --> 00:02:43,340
And I'm going to be one until I'm a dead
old man.
32
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:47,660
I'm sorry, Pop, but I'm flat broke now,
and you're going to have to think of
33
00:02:47,660 --> 00:02:48,660
something else.
34
00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:50,780
I already did, but I don't think it'll
work.
35
00:02:51,900 --> 00:02:52,900
Oh, yeah? What is it?
36
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,460
Me taking Donna to the all -night movie
and taking the blanket with us.
37
00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,160
Hey, get that weed, son. I'll bring your
stuff in. All right.
38
00:03:04,740 --> 00:03:08,020
All right.
39
00:03:11,300 --> 00:03:12,380
Oh, hi, Brady.
40
00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,720
Hi, uh... Lawrence.
41
00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:18,900
Yeah, hi, Lawrence.
42
00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:20,539
Hello, Brady.
43
00:03:20,540 --> 00:03:22,080
Hi, Fred. Come on, sit down.
44
00:03:22,300 --> 00:03:23,760
Yeah. The fight's about to start.
45
00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:25,820
You want a cold beer?
46
00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:27,300
Hey, that would be nice.
47
00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:29,220
Would you mind getting us a cup of beer,
son?
48
00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:32,340
Hey, Grady, why don't you try some of
these horse divers?
49
00:03:34,920 --> 00:03:37,160
Hey, Lamont, hurry up. The fight's need
to start.
50
00:03:38,420 --> 00:03:39,880
Whose fight, Fred, do you know?
51
00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:45,900
Yeah, Indian Joe Roach and a Mexican
fella named, uh, Mexican fella named
52
00:03:45,900 --> 00:03:46,900
Alvarez.
53
00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:50,820
Hey, Pop, that's pronounced Jesus.
54
00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:54,100
Well, he spelled it the same way Jesus
spelled his name.
55
00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:57,480
I know, but you don't say it that way.
56
00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:00,500
Well, they know he's gonna be a fighter.
Why they name him Jesus?
57
00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:05,240
How did his parents know when he was
born that he was gonna be a fighter?
58
00:04:05,260 --> 00:04:07,440
Prim, maybe they thought he was gonna be
a carpenter.
59
00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:10,160
Ooh, look at that left hook.
60
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:12,520
I bet you want no hair growing in that
spot again.
61
00:04:13,560 --> 00:04:16,160
Get up, Roach. Get up before he step on
you.
62
00:04:21,399 --> 00:04:24,160
Wow. That wasn't much of a fight, was
it?
63
00:04:25,100 --> 00:04:27,820
I get to see better fights than that at
home where I board.
64
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,860
You ought to see the Fergusons go at it.
65
00:04:31,700 --> 00:04:32,700
They fight a lot, huh?
66
00:04:33,020 --> 00:04:34,020
All the time.
67
00:04:34,220 --> 00:04:37,840
She picked up a glass one time and threw
it at him and broke all his teeth.
68
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:41,440
Grady, how could she break all of his
teeth?
69
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:43,120
His teeth were in the glass.
70
00:04:53,770 --> 00:04:57,990
the security comes in, I'm going to find
me a place with lots of peace and
71
00:04:57,990 --> 00:05:03,110
quiet. I'm a quiet person. You know
that, Fred. No, I know it. All I like to
72
00:05:03,110 --> 00:05:10,030
is sit in my room at night and do quiet
things, like trim my beard, wash
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00:05:10,030 --> 00:05:12,750
out my eyes, and cut my corns.
74
00:05:13,490 --> 00:05:15,850
Listen, how much you say you pay every
month?
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00:05:16,390 --> 00:05:17,390
$60.
76
00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:21,510
$60 every month? Uh -huh. I'm going to
get us a couple more beers. All right.
77
00:05:27,539 --> 00:05:28,539
Come here, sir.
78
00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:32,960
What? I can't find the can opener. You
don't need no can opener, Pop. All you
79
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:35,500
got to do is pull the tab on the top.
Would you come here?
80
00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:37,580
Excuse me a minute, dear.
81
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:42,220
I told you, we don't need no can opener
with this baby. Just listen.
82
00:05:43,740 --> 00:05:46,500
I figured out a way how we can make some
extra cash.
83
00:05:46,940 --> 00:05:47,719
Oh, yeah?
84
00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:50,600
Yeah, see? Now, Grady don't like the
place he's staying at, right?
85
00:05:50,840 --> 00:05:55,280
So? So, he got 60 bucks a month to pay
for a nice place to stay, right?
86
00:05:55,610 --> 00:05:57,530
I know what you're thinking, Pop, and
forget it.
87
00:05:57,750 --> 00:06:00,170
Forget it? Look, that's $60 steady.
88
00:06:00,430 --> 00:06:04,090
Hey, man, I don't want nobody staying
here steady. Now, we're not so hard up
89
00:06:04,090 --> 00:06:06,390
that we've got to take in boarders for a
crummy $60.
90
00:06:07,030 --> 00:06:08,590
That ain't no crummy $60.
91
00:06:09,010 --> 00:06:10,310
That's $60 steady.
92
00:06:12,090 --> 00:06:13,990
Did you make $60 today?
93
00:06:14,590 --> 00:06:16,310
No. Did you make $60 yesterday?
94
00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:18,250
No. Case closed.
95
00:06:20,650 --> 00:06:23,230
Okay, so business has been a little on
the slack side.
96
00:06:23,770 --> 00:06:26,650
So we take Grady's pension and tighten
up that slack.
97
00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:31,710
Pop, we're only talking about $60 a
month, man. That only comes out to about
98
00:06:31,710 --> 00:06:32,710
a day.
99
00:06:33,210 --> 00:06:34,630
Did you make $2 a day?
100
00:06:36,290 --> 00:06:37,690
Did you make $2 yesterday?
101
00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:41,330
How many times do I have to keep closing
this case?
102
00:06:45,410 --> 00:06:47,250
Okay, Pop, what about your work?
103
00:06:47,510 --> 00:06:48,479
What about it?
104
00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:51,700
If Grady moved in here, you'd never get
nothing done, man. The two of y 'all
105
00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:54,320
would sit around here playing cards and
watching television.
106
00:06:54,740 --> 00:06:59,260
No, we wouldn't. See, Grady could help
me with my coordinating, and then with
107
00:06:59,260 --> 00:07:01,420
arthritis, I need some help around here.
108
00:07:02,260 --> 00:07:03,940
I thought it was in your left hand.
109
00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:05,680
He is spreading.
110
00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,860
Listen, son, it's just for a month. Wait
till we try it, okay?
111
00:07:11,310 --> 00:07:14,650
Pop, it's not going to work, man. I just
know it's not going to work. Sure it'll
112
00:07:14,650 --> 00:07:16,170
work. Sure, I know it'll work.
113
00:07:16,410 --> 00:07:19,490
Listen, and when it's supposed to come,
we'll raise the rent.
114
00:07:21,370 --> 00:07:22,370
Let's go tell him.
115
00:07:22,690 --> 00:07:25,390
All right, but I don't think it's going
to work, Pop. It's going to work.
116
00:07:26,610 --> 00:07:28,090
Here's a couple of beers in there. Bring
them out.
117
00:07:30,970 --> 00:07:31,970
Grady?
118
00:07:32,930 --> 00:07:33,930
Grady? Grady?
119
00:07:35,770 --> 00:07:37,670
Oh, yeah.
120
00:07:39,770 --> 00:07:42,360
It's so quiet in here. Hey, I almost
dozed off.
121
00:07:43,040 --> 00:07:45,840
Yeah. Yeah, where you been? You missed
the whole last ballot.
122
00:07:46,060 --> 00:07:47,520
Well, we were in there talking, Brady.
123
00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:50,180
Now, I got to ask you something.
124
00:07:51,380 --> 00:07:53,600
Now, you like both of us, don't you?
125
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:55,140
Like you?
126
00:07:55,500 --> 00:07:57,100
Why, you like family to me.
127
00:07:57,740 --> 00:07:59,420
Fred, you like a brother to me.
128
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,280
And, uh, Lance.
129
00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:03,120
Yeah.
130
00:08:03,620 --> 00:08:05,180
Lance here is like a brother.
131
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,300
Well, here's what I want to ask you.
132
00:08:09,740 --> 00:08:13,120
Instead of living there with the
Ferguson where they be fighting all the
133
00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:17,360
and keeping you upset, why don't you
move in here with me and, uh... Lance?
134
00:08:18,260 --> 00:08:19,360
Yeah, me and Lance.
135
00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:23,120
Move in here with you?
136
00:08:23,460 --> 00:08:26,180
You mean be a boarder with you? That's
right.
137
00:08:27,140 --> 00:08:32,100
Well, that'd be like living with my own
family, wouldn't it? Your own family.
138
00:08:58,060 --> 00:08:59,060
live with family.
139
00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:05,040
Yeah, see now, so instead of giving $60
to some strangers, you're giving that
140
00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:06,800
$60 to your own family.
141
00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:09,320
My own family.
142
00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:10,980
That's right, $60.
143
00:09:12,460 --> 00:09:13,460
Oh.
144
00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:16,300
Hey, Grady, now, is that a deal?
145
00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:19,620
Wait a minute, Pop. Maybe Grady would
like to think about it for a while.
146
00:09:19,860 --> 00:09:22,280
No, there's nothing to think about.
147
00:09:23,340 --> 00:09:24,340
I'm touched.
148
00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:26,580
See that? You heard him blow his nose.
149
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:28,040
He's touched.
150
00:09:33,060 --> 00:09:37,460
All I can think about is how soon can I
move in?
151
00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:38,700
Anytime you get ready.
152
00:09:38,900 --> 00:09:41,680
Can I move in tonight and bring my
things over tomorrow?
153
00:09:42,060 --> 00:09:44,260
Yeah, great. You can go on upstairs now
and go to sleep.
154
00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:45,960
Listen, you take my room.
155
00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,200
Your room?
156
00:09:47,660 --> 00:09:49,540
You're giving me your room?
157
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:50,800
My room.
158
00:09:56,780 --> 00:09:59,120
When you stop that, you're going to blow
something out of your head that you
159
00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:00,120
need.
160
00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:02,200
Come on, Grady.
161
00:10:02,820 --> 00:10:06,180
You go up here and make yourself feel at
home here.
162
00:10:07,020 --> 00:10:08,960
I don't know what to say.
163
00:10:09,540 --> 00:10:10,640
Thank you, Fred.
164
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:11,900
Well, good night, Grady.
165
00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:12,960
Good night, Fred.
166
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:14,660
And good night, Lucas.
167
00:10:17,020 --> 00:10:19,420
Lucas. Yeah, good night, Lucas.
168
00:10:20,420 --> 00:10:21,740
My old family.
169
00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:23,540
Fred and Lucas.
170
00:10:25,660 --> 00:10:26,660
Now, listen.
171
00:10:26,780 --> 00:10:27,780
Hold it, Lucas.
172
00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:34,560
I knew there was another one coming.
173
00:10:35,420 --> 00:10:39,480
See, son, you made an old man happy. And
we get 60 bucks per side.
174
00:10:39,820 --> 00:10:41,800
Okay, smart guy, now just tell me one
thing.
175
00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,260
Where are you going to sleep tonight?
176
00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:45,360
I'll sleep in your bed.
177
00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:49,520
Oh, no, you're not sleeping with me. You
dribble on the pillow.
178
00:10:50,820 --> 00:10:53,720
And you make them old man smacking
sounds with your mouth.
179
00:11:08,630 --> 00:11:09,630
Well,
180
00:11:11,030 --> 00:11:12,770
I can't sleep on the couch with my
arthritis.
181
00:11:13,750 --> 00:11:16,390
You don't have no trouble sleeping on it
during the day when you're supposed to
182
00:11:16,390 --> 00:11:17,329
be doing some work.
183
00:11:17,330 --> 00:11:19,410
Well, I can't sleep all night when I'm
supposed to be sleeping.
184
00:11:21,950 --> 00:11:23,510
I'm not sleeping on no couch.
185
00:11:24,030 --> 00:11:25,810
Well, neither one of us might have to
have to sleep on it.
186
00:11:26,050 --> 00:11:28,930
Every time you always come up with
something, I always get the short end of
187
00:11:28,930 --> 00:11:31,090
I got to come down here and you want me
to sleep on the cot.
188
00:11:31,310 --> 00:11:33,730
Listen, don't worry. I told you nothing
was going to work out. Be prepared.
189
00:11:33,930 --> 00:11:34,829
That's the thing.
190
00:11:34,830 --> 00:11:37,150
You tell me you're going to sleep on
that old army cot.
191
00:11:37,670 --> 00:11:38,670
No, you are.
192
00:11:40,010 --> 00:11:41,490
I can't sleep on that.
193
00:11:42,090 --> 00:11:45,010
Well, I slept on it when I was in the
army all the time. All right, then
194
00:11:45,010 --> 00:11:46,290
used to it, so you sleep on it.
195
00:11:46,630 --> 00:11:48,550
I did my time on it. Now it's your turn.
196
00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:50,810
Forget it.
197
00:11:51,250 --> 00:11:52,730
Well, look here. We have to take turns.
198
00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:54,580
Now, what could be fairer than that?
199
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:56,160
You sleep on it tonight.
200
00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:57,940
I'm not sleeping on that.
201
00:11:59,320 --> 00:11:59,720
On
202
00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:06,340
second
203
00:12:06,340 --> 00:12:08,540
thought, maybe I will sleep down here.
204
00:12:09,260 --> 00:12:11,640
I don't think I want to go up there with
him snowing like that.
205
00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:13,540
It is kind of loud in here.
206
00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:17,140
Why don't you go up there and close the
door? All right.
207
00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:20,080
Let's see how I did this at Fort Dix.
208
00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:26,639
Hey, Pop?
209
00:12:26,640 --> 00:12:28,420
Yeah? Hey, Pop?
210
00:12:28,620 --> 00:12:29,620
Huh?
211
00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:32,720
The door is closed.
212
00:12:40,980 --> 00:12:41,980
Hey,
213
00:12:43,820 --> 00:12:47,540
Pop, is Greg ever going to come out of
the bathroom? He's been up there for
214
00:12:47,540 --> 00:12:49,660
hours. He took the newspaper with him.
215
00:12:50,440 --> 00:12:51,720
Maybe he's a slow reader.
216
00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:54,360
Yeah, well, what am I supposed to do?
217
00:12:54,780 --> 00:12:56,340
He's glad it wasn't a Sunday paper.
218
00:12:59,340 --> 00:13:01,060
This is ridiculous, you know that?
219
00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:05,700
Well, see, it's a habit he picked up
when he's living at the Ferguson's,
220
00:13:05,700 --> 00:13:08,000
the bathroom was the quietest spot in
the house.
221
00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:11,240
Yeah, well, what's he doing it here for?
Ain't nobody fighting in this house.
222
00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:14,320
It's a habit, and I just have to help
him kick it.
223
00:13:14,860 --> 00:13:16,700
And I know just how to do it. How?
224
00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:20,960
We hide the toilet seat from him and
only give it to him when he really needs
225
00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:21,960
it.
226
00:13:24,910 --> 00:13:27,750
It's not going to do no good. Once he
gets it, he'll still be sitting there
227
00:13:27,750 --> 00:13:30,010
hours. Not if we hide it in the freezer.
228
00:13:34,290 --> 00:13:38,170
I'm sorry I ever let you talk me into
this, man. First, he keeps me up snoring
229
00:13:38,170 --> 00:13:40,810
all night, and now I can't even use my
own bathroom.
230
00:13:41,210 --> 00:13:42,770
Where are you going? To the filling
station.
231
00:13:43,230 --> 00:13:44,930
The filling station? That's right.
232
00:13:45,310 --> 00:13:46,870
You don't have to go to the filling
station.
233
00:13:47,470 --> 00:13:49,810
See, Brady just don't know the rules
around here now.
234
00:13:50,110 --> 00:13:52,790
Said it's three people got to use the
toilet. Yeah, well, I wish you'd explain
235
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:56,130
it to him. In the meantime, I have to
use the filling station. This is a drag.
236
00:13:58,010 --> 00:13:59,010
Hey, Grady!
237
00:13:59,610 --> 00:14:00,610
Grady!
238
00:14:08,310 --> 00:14:09,610
Grady! What
239
00:14:09,610 --> 00:14:15,750
a world.
240
00:14:16,150 --> 00:14:17,150
What a world.
241
00:14:17,670 --> 00:14:18,870
What are you talking about, Grady?
242
00:14:19,100 --> 00:14:22,280
You know, you read the bad news in the
morning newspaper and it makes you feel
243
00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:24,380
like you don't ever want to come out of
the toilet.
244
00:14:24,700 --> 00:14:25,700
Yeah.
245
00:14:25,820 --> 00:14:27,260
It's beginning to look like that.
246
00:14:28,700 --> 00:14:30,140
Huh? Nothing, Grady.
247
00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:32,000
Just Lamont was waiting to get in.
248
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:34,960
Oh, I'm sorry, Fred. Why didn't he call
me?
249
00:14:35,340 --> 00:14:37,700
He probably is calling you something all
the way to the filling station.
250
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:41,920
I'm sorry. I don't want to cause no
trouble.
251
00:14:42,120 --> 00:14:43,120
Well, forget about it, Grady.
252
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:44,740
Come on in here with me.
253
00:14:45,460 --> 00:14:46,460
Come on in, Grady.
254
00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:47,960
I'll fix you something to eat.
255
00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:50,140
Oh, no thanks, Fred. I'm not hungry.
256
00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:53,440
Well, sit on down. You will be hungry
when you find out what I'm going to fix
257
00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:54,179
for us.
258
00:14:54,180 --> 00:14:57,180
See, I've been saving three eggs in
there for Lamont's Sunday breakfast.
259
00:14:57,540 --> 00:15:01,360
And because it's your first day here,
I'm going to fix us an omelet.
260
00:15:02,580 --> 00:15:03,980
Nice, big, fluffy omelet.
261
00:15:04,260 --> 00:15:05,300
I know how to do that.
262
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,160
See, I'll take these three.
263
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:11,280
Where are these three eggs I had in
here?
264
00:15:11,900 --> 00:15:13,800
Oh, you mean those three eggs that went
in there?
265
00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:16,300
Yeah, those three eggs went in here.
266
00:15:17,900 --> 00:15:21,360
Oh, I'm sorry, Fred, but I ate those
earlier. That's why I ain't hungry.
267
00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:26,420
You ate all three of them? That's all I
could find.
268
00:15:27,820 --> 00:15:32,160
Well, never mind, Grady. We'll just have
us some coffee and watch television.
269
00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:36,560
Oh, now that'd be nice. That's a good
idea, watching television.
270
00:15:36,860 --> 00:15:39,680
Yeah, I'd love it. Yeah, a little old
television.
271
00:15:40,260 --> 00:15:44,540
I'm finished with my morning newspaper,
and now I'm ready for television.
272
00:15:47,260 --> 00:15:48,260
Turn on the news, Fred.
273
00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:52,160
I don't want to listen to no news,
Grady. Why don't you listen to the news
274
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,840
in the morning? Well, I thought you'd
want to watch something educational.
275
00:15:56,140 --> 00:15:58,000
Okay, you got a choice of three.
276
00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:02,380
Captain Kangaroo, Deputy Dog, or
Huckaberry Hound.
277
00:16:03,740 --> 00:16:05,840
Oh, I don't like none of those, Fred.
278
00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:09,180
If you don't want to watch what I want
to watch, why don't you go back up in
279
00:16:09,180 --> 00:16:13,500
toilet? Well, I don't want to go back up
in there. They don't have no television
280
00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:14,960
shows up there, Fred.
281
00:16:15,180 --> 00:16:16,180
Well, start your own.
282
00:16:17,989 --> 00:16:20,290
Leave the door open and call it Face the
Nation.
283
00:16:33,230 --> 00:16:39,010
Good morning, Fred.
284
00:16:39,370 --> 00:16:40,370
Good morning.
285
00:16:40,590 --> 00:16:42,390
My goodness, what a pleasant surprise.
286
00:16:42,690 --> 00:16:43,690
Hey, Grady.
287
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,700
You remember Donna Harris, my fiancée.
288
00:16:46,020 --> 00:16:49,400
Grady. See, Grady moved in with us, and
he's sleeping in my room now.
289
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:52,960
Hey, Donna, what brings you by here so
early in the morning? Well, I was out on
290
00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:55,980
a call in the neighborhood and thought,
while I'm here, I'll stop by and give
291
00:16:55,980 --> 00:16:56,980
you a neck rub.
292
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:59,500
Oh, that's so thoughtful of you. Come on
over here.
293
00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:03,460
Hey, Grady, see, Donna's a practical
nurse, and she cracks my neck.
294
00:17:03,700 --> 00:17:04,700
Oh, really?
295
00:17:04,780 --> 00:17:05,780
Yeah.
296
00:17:06,060 --> 00:17:07,660
And she does toes, too.
297
00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:11,040
Sometimes she crack my neck and toes so
good, it sounds like the post you're
298
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:12,040
lying in.
299
00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:14,229
You ready, Fred?
300
00:17:14,230 --> 00:17:16,109
Your steady Freddy is ready.
301
00:17:17,730 --> 00:17:23,030
Is it a tightness in both sides of the
neck going down to the shoulder?
302
00:17:23,250 --> 00:17:24,650
Well, yes, that's right. That's tension.
303
00:17:25,050 --> 00:17:28,790
Is that what you feel now? Yeah, I'm
tense and stiff and everything.
304
00:17:29,890 --> 00:17:30,950
Would you do me?
305
00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:32,250
Well, let's see.
306
00:17:32,290 --> 00:17:33,290
Oh, excuse me, Fred.
307
00:17:34,790 --> 00:17:37,570
Oh, my, yes, you are tight.
308
00:17:37,850 --> 00:17:39,270
Much more so than Fred.
309
00:17:39,990 --> 00:17:40,990
Oh, now.
310
00:17:44,040 --> 00:17:45,100
That feels just great.
311
00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:49,080
Say, if I run upstairs and wash my feet,
will you do my toes?
312
00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:50,980
She ain't doing no toes, Brady.
313
00:17:55,540 --> 00:17:58,460
Oh, I'm sorry, Fred. I didn't want to
cause no trouble.
314
00:17:59,540 --> 00:18:00,540
Hey,
315
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,000
Pop, I'm home.
316
00:18:03,140 --> 00:18:04,140
Yeah.
317
00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:06,860
What's the matter with you? You look
like you're mad about something.
318
00:18:07,320 --> 00:18:08,320
I am.
319
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,000
Mad at myself.
320
00:18:10,180 --> 00:18:11,180
For what?
321
00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:13,380
For talking you into letting Brady stay
here.
322
00:18:14,350 --> 00:18:15,430
I've decided, Thompson.
323
00:18:16,310 --> 00:18:17,310
Grady's got to go.
324
00:18:17,870 --> 00:18:21,110
But he just moved in here, and he's
probably on his way over here now with
325
00:18:21,110 --> 00:18:22,250
things. What are you going to tell him?
326
00:18:22,870 --> 00:18:25,650
I don't know, but he's such a dear
friend of mine.
327
00:18:26,290 --> 00:18:27,950
I don't want to hurt his feelings.
328
00:18:28,590 --> 00:18:29,590
What?
329
00:18:32,370 --> 00:18:35,250
We've got to figure out something right
away before he comes right down to the
330
00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:37,010
suitcase and a big smile on his face.
331
00:18:37,310 --> 00:18:40,670
Yeah, he's probably thinking about all
that peace and quiet he's going to have
332
00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:41,670
with his new family.
333
00:18:46,670 --> 00:18:47,670
What?
334
00:18:47,910 --> 00:18:51,750
Oh, that peace and quiet he thought he
was going to have with his new family.
335
00:18:52,130 --> 00:18:53,130
Are you with me, son?
336
00:18:53,190 --> 00:18:54,550
I'm way ahead of you, Pop.
337
00:18:55,850 --> 00:18:59,930
Come on in, Grady, buddy.
338
00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:03,010
Hi, Bill, pal.
339
00:19:03,270 --> 00:19:06,630
Hey, you got all your stuff in there,
Grady? Yeah, most of it. But I still had
340
00:19:06,630 --> 00:19:10,230
to get out of there in a hurry. The
Fergusons were right in the middle of a
341
00:19:10,230 --> 00:19:12,450
fight, and I just couldn't stand a
racket.
342
00:19:12,790 --> 00:19:15,690
That really gets to you, don't it? It
ties my stomach in knots.
343
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:17,880
Makes me feel like I want to barf.
344
00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:24,440
Well, look, Brady, why don't you go on
upstairs and relax and make yourself at
345
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:27,320
home, like, and dinner will be ready in
about an hour and a half, two hours.
346
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:28,500
Okay.
347
00:19:29,840 --> 00:19:31,820
See, dinner will be ready in about an
hour or two.
348
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:33,240
Sorry it's a little late, Brady.
349
00:19:33,860 --> 00:19:35,360
How come dinner ain't ready now?
350
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:39,160
Because I forgot to fix it. What do you
mean you forgot? You forgot? You mean to
351
00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:41,500
tell me you're getting so old you can't
remember to cook dinner?
352
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:42,800
Who you call?
353
00:19:44,300 --> 00:19:46,060
I can't give you one of these across
your lips.
354
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:49,000
If I was you, I wouldn't try.
355
00:19:49,220 --> 00:19:51,520
Who? I'll try it. I'll knock you out.
356
00:19:53,100 --> 00:19:56,420
How are you going to knock me out when
you can't even remember to cook dinner?
357
00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:59,860
Who? All right. Put your hands up. I
don't have to put my hands up.
358
00:20:15,660 --> 00:20:17,120
It's a family argument. Come on.
359
00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:18,319
I'm coming.
360
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,340
Let me see what you got on the other
side. I got blue stuff.
361
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:24,920
Hold it. Hold it.
362
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:28,260
No, I didn't know you two had family
arguments.
363
00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:30,960
Now this ain't going to take too long.
Where's my bat?
364
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:34,620
In about four or five hours. Four or
five hours.
365
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,880
We'll finish it then. We'll finish it
tomorrow. Come on. That's right.
366
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:44,980
Come on, Fred. You know I don't never
back out. No agreements, Fred.
367
00:20:45,500 --> 00:20:47,420
I just can't stand no fighting.
368
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:51,960
Hey, just get out of the way, buddy.
Come on in to me. Come on in to me.
369
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,060
that line. I don't need to cross the
line.
370
00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:16,060
We make a good team, Pop. We were a good
team. Yeah.
371
00:21:16,300 --> 00:21:19,360
You were Butch Cassidy, and I was a
Sundance kid. All right.
372
00:21:20,100 --> 00:21:21,220
Let's go have dinner, Pop.
373
00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:23,480
Huh?
374
00:21:23,740 --> 00:21:24,740
Go have dinner.
375
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:26,900
Yeah, let's go have dinner. We can't.
376
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:30,300
What do you mean we can't? I ain't
cooking nothing. I really forgot to
377
00:21:31,260 --> 00:21:32,420
You forgot to cook?
378
00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:35,480
Yeah. How could you forget to cook?
379
00:21:35,760 --> 00:21:37,120
Because I'm a human being.
380
00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:38,320
I forgot to cook.
381
00:21:41,710 --> 00:21:44,470
You could forget, but how could you
forget to cook dinner? Like I told you
382
00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:46,490
earlier, I forgot because I'm human.
383
00:21:47,350 --> 00:21:51,170
All the excitement going on with Brady
and everything, I just forgot to fix it.
384
00:21:51,270 --> 00:21:54,950
That's not the reason. What's the
reason? You're just getting so old that
385
00:21:54,950 --> 00:21:56,250
can't remember to cook dinner.
386
00:21:56,630 --> 00:21:57,690
Who are you calling old?
387
00:21:58,750 --> 00:22:00,410
There ain't but two of us in the
kitchen.
388
00:22:01,090 --> 00:22:03,690
I ain't so old I can't give you one of
these across your neck.
389
00:22:04,010 --> 00:22:05,690
Hey, man, if I was you, I wouldn't try.
390
00:22:06,170 --> 00:22:10,410
I'll try it in time I get ready. I
raised you. I'll knock you out. I'm on
391
00:22:21,530 --> 00:22:24,170
Well, I'm going to work, Pop. I'll see
you at lunchtime. Okay, son.
392
00:22:24,450 --> 00:22:25,450
Hey, you know what?
393
00:22:25,530 --> 00:22:27,830
It sure is a pleasure to be able to use
your own bathroom.
394
00:22:28,290 --> 00:22:31,950
Yeah, that's right. See, a man's home is
his castle, and he shouldn't have to
395
00:22:31,950 --> 00:22:32,950
share his throne.
396
00:22:35,450 --> 00:22:36,650
Right. Right.
397
00:22:37,590 --> 00:22:40,150
I wonder who that is. I hope it ain't
Grady. Me, too.
398
00:22:43,050 --> 00:22:45,650
Good morning, Commod. Oh, hi, Donna.
Donna, are you here again?
399
00:22:46,270 --> 00:22:47,390
Yes. What a surprise.
400
00:22:47,850 --> 00:22:51,710
Well, I think you got short chains
yesterday on your neck rub, so I'm here
401
00:22:51,710 --> 00:22:52,710
to finish the job.
402
00:22:52,830 --> 00:22:53,830
Oh, that's wonderful.
403
00:22:54,410 --> 00:22:57,810
Lamont, Donna's going to do my neck.
She's going to crack it for me. Bye.
404
00:22:58,150 --> 00:22:59,390
Where's your friend this morning?
405
00:22:59,810 --> 00:23:02,830
Oh, well, him staying here didn't work
out, so he moved.
406
00:23:03,170 --> 00:23:04,170
Oh.
407
00:23:04,290 --> 00:23:05,290
Bye, son.
408
00:23:05,930 --> 00:23:06,930
Ready to do my neck?
409
00:23:06,990 --> 00:23:07,990
Mm -hmm.
410
00:23:11,850 --> 00:23:13,450
Do you actually crack his neck?
411
00:23:13,690 --> 00:23:16,610
No. I just work out the stiffness and
the tension.
412
00:23:17,130 --> 00:23:20,150
Yeah. She just works out the stiffness
and the tension.
413
00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:23,110
Bye, son.
414
00:23:25,470 --> 00:23:32,410
Uh, is it a... Is it a tightness on both
sides of the neck leading
415
00:23:32,410 --> 00:23:33,410
down to the shoulders?
416
00:23:33,550 --> 00:23:35,650
Well, yes, that's it. Is that what you
feel? Yeah.
417
00:23:36,190 --> 00:23:39,230
Uh, look here, son, why don't you get on
moving now? But I just want... I'm not
418
00:23:39,230 --> 00:23:42,850
going to do your neck or your toes. But
I... I don't want to work. I just
419
00:23:42,850 --> 00:23:44,950
want... And try to get back here with
about 50 bucks.
420
00:23:47,130 --> 00:23:48,470
There's a tightness around the neck.
421
00:23:48,730 --> 00:23:49,730
Tightness over here.
422
00:23:49,910 --> 00:23:52,250
Get me 50 bucks or something. Fred.
423
00:23:52,970 --> 00:23:56,010
Fred, do you need some money? If you do,
I can loan you some.
424
00:23:56,730 --> 00:23:59,950
Well, I'll sure pay you back as soon as
we get back from where we're going.
425
00:24:00,470 --> 00:24:01,470
Where are we going?
426
00:24:01,750 --> 00:24:03,830
You'll find out when we get to
Disneyland.
427
00:24:23,410 --> 00:24:26,730
Sanford and Son is recorded on tape for
a live studio audience.
34214
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