Original subtitles

Anything else you'd like to list as a strength?

I would say I'm good with people, provided they're not morons.

Did you mention about being passionate, like I told you?

Employers love to hear the word passion.

I'm passionate.

Excuse me? I have a lot of passion.

For jobs.

This flatmate of yours, Ruth?

Don't know if you're her type.

The whole older guy thing and everything.

So you're saying I haven't really got the job? You have really got the job at

the end of your one month's probation.

A month, right.

That's what did Molly say?

I haven't told her yet.

You want to chip into that?

Chip in.

I never even realised. Well done, Carol.

Hello again.

Hello there.

You wouldn't be one of the new guys, would you? I would, yes.

Lawrence Duffy.

Well, you've timed your entrance very nicely. We've a few starting today, but

you're one of mine. I'm your supervisor, Robbie Quigley.

Quigley. Any relation to... Yes, I am the boss's son.

Sorry, I didn't mean any offence.

When? I don't know why I said that.

Okay, shall we?

Yeah, Dad started this business at the height of the Celtic Tiger. People said

he was nuts.

And those first few years were tough, God knows.

But the economy has turned around, and now we can't hearth that fast enough.

Okay. This is a golden age for the loan consolidation and short -term finance

industry.

Just like Chiefie. What's that now?

Sorry, nothing.

You say sorry a lot. I don't usually. Sorry.

I'll try to stop.

Gina, George, Brian, this is your new colleague, Lawrence Duffy. Hi. Lawrence,

how's it going?

Welcome, welcome.

Hello, everyone.

Lovely to meet you.

Hopefully we can all have a fruitful, you know, fruitful...

Lawrence, the guy to get you up and running on the computer, show you what's

what, and I'll see you later.

Anything you need, just holler. OK, thanks.

Before I go, HR asked me to remind you that you need to supply a PPS number. A

what?

PPS? Personal Public Service for Tax and what have you. You don't know what a

PPS number is.

What are you, Amish?

Shh.

I'll ask my mother. She's sure to know.

Do you know what?

I am really getting the hang of this.

You're getting the hang of reading names off a page and typing them in.

Congratulations.

After a while, you'll find you start zoning out, and the whole day just kind

drifts by.

From then on, you can leave your brain at the front door and pick it up again

when it's time to go home.

Oh, yeah. I think I'm going to be sick.

I see the good Lord has sent me another of life's winners.

Lawrence, we have proper wipes for the monitors.

The little damp lads in the stationery cupboard.

Top shelf.

Where's the stationery cupboard?

Oi, no stealing stationery. I wasn't. Relax.

Joking. Everything good?

Fine, thank you. No, thank you.

Somebody moved it.

I went to get it for you.

Thanks, Robbie.

This has not been my proudest five minutes.

Grand relax.

I could really do with a cup of tea.

Is there some sort of waiter service, or how does that work?

No, you just ring reception and let them know what you want.

Dial zero.

Really? Yeah, of course.

Hello. Yes.

This is Lauren Duffy from client, um, data entry.

Oh, hi.

Can I get a cup of tea, please? Plenty of milk, like, think of an amount, then

double it. Sorry, one second.

Does anybody else want anything?

Yeah, I'll have a latte, two sugars.

Nothing for me, thanks.

And a latte with, sorry?

Oh.

My apologies.

That's fun for YouTube.

Hi, Adam.

Hi, Ruth. How's it going?

You selling something?

No, no. Just here to share the good news about Jesus.

It's Tara I'm after, actually. Is she around?

Oh, no, she's in the rip with her musical crowd.

I should have called ahead.

Hello. Tara?

Listen, not to worry, I'll get her again.

Oh, would you like a glass of wine?

I'd love to, honestly, but I should go.

Is there a message for Tara, even?

No, no, I just wanted to see if she was available to do the quiz this week.

Oh, right.

The quiz that she's been doing every week for years.

I thought... Here we go.

I'll show you to the door.

Nice to meet you. All right.

Sorry to disturb you.

Don't be doubtful.

You haven't gone for a drink yet.

Oh, yeah? You still on for that?

Yeah, of course.

Okay. Well, how about tomorrow night?

Perfect.

7 .30.

Sounds good.

That wasn't too hard, was it?

Well, that was easy.

See you tomorrow.

All right. See you then.

Pork sat beside me in class today. Not pork with the muscles, a different pork.

We had two porks anyway.

Oh, my God, the whack of them.

You'd be all you could photograph.

Do you think you have problems?

Guests I had after double Irish.

What?

Double maths.

Aisling, I had no idea that place was such a hellhole.

Let's reef you out of there and find a better school.

What about you?

Got anything you want to vent about?

No.

So everything at work was perfect today?

Pretty much.

My work's fine.

No annoying customers?

Not one?

Nope.

Hey, I know. Let's go out for a drink tonight.

What do you say, Lawrence?

I don't know if I'm in the mood.

The pub's full of yammering people.

God knows who you'd be stuck beside.

Do you hear this? Do you hear that?

I'm not asking. I'm telling you.

You'll be all right in your own for a while, won't you?

That'll do.

Who are we hiding from?

Sorry?

Did I go into the witness protection programme and not even notice?

It's cosy here.

What do you have?

Gin and tonic, please.

Evening. Nice to see Molly again. It's been a while.

A pint and a gin and tonic, please. I want to get these donuts and get out of

here before someone comes over to commiserate about the tragic loss of the

shack. OK.

So?

It's not what I'm used to.

Did you have to be there all the time and do stuff?

Yeah, and it's all so public, Adam. It's like you're on display or something.

Well, this was the first day's the worst.

Probably like a cold pool.

Once you've been in for a while, it gets tolerable.

Go on. I'll bring your pint over.

I think one drink would nearly do me.

Are you knackered?

I bet you are. You've been so busy.

What's the point in going out for just one drink? We might as well... Ah,

there's Luna.

No, don't call her over. I haven't seen her in young. Go on.

Why not?

I can't stand Luna.

She only met her once.

Yeah, well, if you must know...

I thought she was about racist.

What? Where did you get that?

Look. Hi, Molly. Hiya. Nice to see you.

How's things?

I'm grand, thanks. But, Lord, it's been weird.

What, weirder than usual, even?

Mm -hm.

So how's the course going?

Oh, it's great. I'm loving it.

I'm starting my placement tomorrow, so I'll be rattling around in the back of

actual, honest -to -God, ambulance. No way.

Yeah, just observing for now, being the third person. They call it a deal.

can't we?

Well, it's exciting, isn't it? Yeah.

Lawrence, isn't that exciting?

Yeah.

Thanks, honey, wouldn't you?

Your enthusiasm means so much to me. I'm enthusiastic.

All right, I just wanted to say hi.

Well, good luck tomorrow.

Knock him dead or keep him alive.

I'll do my best. We won't be staying long.

Lawrence, what is wrong with you? You came home from work like a wee boy who

lost his action, man. You've been talking about going home ever since we

here three minutes ago.

And every time I look at you, you're doing this... mere cat impression.

What's going on?

The thing is...

The thing is...

The

thing

is...

What?

I'm just worried about you, Molly, being in the ambulance.

You're going to become terrible things.

Oh,

you're sweet to worry.

Try to relax.

I'm a professional now.

Lawrence. What?

Don't look so worried.

Just wanted to tell you well done on a flying start.

I've been looking at your first day's numbers and you're doing great.

As a matter of fact, you're the fastest one here.

So, keep it up.

Maybe you should take your foot off the gas a little bit there, hot shot.

I don't want to make us look bad.

Is this another joke?

I'm sorry, but I really need this job.

I'm not doing anything to jeopardise it.

I'm on probation here.

Good for you.

Not a team player.

That's fair enough.

It's good to know where we stand.

Lawrence, are you doing the probation as well? No one asked for your input,

Brian.

Lawrence is just being cautious, and he's right. He knows what little slip

could lead to disaster.

That's two nothings in a row.

I can't tell if I'm relieved or disappointed.

In Mrs. Neary's defence, her father is very constipated. Personally, I wouldn't

have called it a 999 situation, but then not just me. At least the alfalo is

friendly. I'd have a lovely warm glow from that thing you said about my

You're doing well, though.

Good with people. That's a huge part of the job and can't be taught.

Molly. Yes? I guarantee you that by the end of the day, you'll look back on your

first couple of nuttons and you'll wish to hell things had stayed that way.

Yeah, of course.

Sorry.

Brian, this one has a note in it. It's probably a job story.

I shouldn't call them that.

Yeah.

We get a lot of these.

Some people want you to know that they're not hopeless with money or in

drug dealers or whatever.

They're just a bad luck lady.

It's like... I don't know, they want someone to talk to, so... That's really

sad. Sad isn't pathetic, yes.

You spend money you haven't got.

You get into difficulty.

That's why I never go over my credit card limit.

Somebody but us don't understand the small print.

These clowns don't understand the large print.

That's why the Quigleys owner... Really?

Absolutely.

Compound interest.

She's running a chepstow next week, actually.

What have we here?

Chepstow, is it?

You don't need to worry yourself about that, Lawrence.

Let's just harvest their details and move on with our lives.

Thanks, Robbie.

Sorry, Robbie.

Lawrence.

None of my business.

But Robbie doesn't really go for all the licking up stuff.

He hates it.

Mentioned it a few times.

What licking up?

I was not licking up. Yes, Robbie.

Sorry, Robbie.

No one's criticising you. We're just saying there's no need to humiliate

yourself in front of everyone like that. Because it doesn't even work.

Not on Robbie.

Not his thing.

He's probably in there right now making a note.

Lawrence.

Comma.

Licky. Were you licky to the boss in your last job, too?

What was your last job, anyway? You never told us.

Entertainment. What, were you in the circus?

No. I could see that.

Hey, Ruth.

Adam, how's it going? Come here. I completely forgot. I had to show my face

housewarming tonight. Well, a tiny flatwarming, really. But I promised I'd

there. I'm so sorry. That's OK.

No problem.

Another time?

No, no, no, no. I'm not counselling. I just wanted to let you know I'll be

delayed.

I'm still coming.

OK. Great.

But I'll see you later, yeah?

Yeah, that'll do.

All right, that's one milligram of glucagon.

1 .4 originally. He's going to die.

What? This has happened too many times. We can't keep getting away with it.

He's going to die.

He's going to die. No, no. He probably isn't.

Probably. What does probably mean?

Molly?

Let's talk about something else.

Will we have a cup of tea? A nice cup of tea. Calm us all down.

A cup of tea?

No.

He's going to die.

That's it, David.

That's it, David. Take it easy.

Cup of tea.

A cup of tea.

Why, there's someone dying right in front of her.

He wasn't dying. He was just hyperglycemic.

Matt gave him a shot of glucagon and he was fine eventually.

He left him scoffing a sandwich the size of his head.

That's the one I'm going to remember when I'm old and grey.

Not the constipated elf fella. Not the little girl with the broken ankle.

It's going to be that one.

The tea lady they're calling me now.

You were a bit quiet tonight. Was I boring you with my story?

No, of course not.

I loved us today. I really loved us.

Good. I'm glad.

What is it, then? What's wrong?

Nothing.

Well, well, well. Well, well, well.

Hello, Adam.

Ruth, you look like you had a good night.

Yes, it was a very good night, thank you.

So, are you going to invite me in, Lord?

Sorry, absolutely.

I can give you the tour.

This is the sitting room. Where, in the background?

Look at you in the

kitchen. Pleasure.

I'm just out of dung. Pleasure.

All right, you win.

I know.

Would you like a wee cup of coffee or?

I'm good.

Milk, even?

Huh?

Okay.

Ashley, is everything okay?

Everything's fine.

We're doing The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas in English.

Where it is, there's a movie on that. Is that right?

Yeah, 2008, directed by Mark Herman, from the novel by John Boyne. Have you

it in the flick shack?

Sure. But I don't know if it's... I'm just at the street. I want to grab it

before anyone else does.

See you. Actually, you know personal calls are frowned on, don't you?

You could get in trouble.

I'm going to get a hot chocolate.

You coming, Lance?

Yeah.

Come here. Don't pay any attention to those two.

Huh? George and his little helper monkey back there.

He's going to be nasty, I know.

Tell you the truth.

When I first started, they really got to me. Yeah.

I've never told anyone this before.

When it was really bad.

I used to cry myself to sleep. Ashley!

Where are you?

The place is all closed up.

Okay, okay, okay. Don't. Just go to the coffee shop, please. Don't move or do

anything or call anyone until I get there.

Especially not your mother.

I cannot wait to hear this.

Excuse me.

Oh, well.

Oh, Lauren, is that insane?

All right, all right.

What are you going to say when you get caught?

Because you're bound to get caught.

Look, I'm willing to concede that perhaps it wasn't a 100 % brilliant

No percent.

It's a no percent brilliant idea.

But I'm committed to it now.

And I'm going to see it through.

The second my preparation's up, I'll tell your mother everything.

Maybe she'll see the funny side.

What funny side?

The main thing.

The main thing, actually, is...

This has to be our little secret.

I won't say a word.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I'll get these.

Who knows?

Maybe there'll be something you can do for me one day.

A little quid pro quo.

A

quid

pro quo.

It's in case you ever need to use it again.

Robbie stopped by.

What?

He was wondering where you were. He seemed kind of upset.

Not true, Lawrence. We haven't seen him. Who was talking to you, squealer?

He easily could have stopped by.

If you're going to disappear like that, give us the heads up and we'll cover for

you.

Don't forget, you're on probation.

Thanks, George.

You're welcome.