Original subtitles

Help me!

Back straight.

And feed.

You're supposed to throw him through a plate glass window.

Why? Accepted agent's practice.

You should always try, wherever possible, to toss your opponent through

nearest window.

Double glazed, preferably. It's more effective and much more spectacular.

I remember.

Better than that, you may have a chance to prove the theory.

Action. One Mr. Grant has gone missing.

I'll get my coat.

And the disguise.

Disguise? I want to try it out.

Like it?

Yeah. Good.

Now, where are we off? The trail starts where Mr. Grant stopped at a small

country hotel.

Your friend, Mr. Grant, certainly traveled a lot. Not even a change of

He's not a friend, a colleague.

What was your colleague doing?

I don't really know.

He's a very odd character. He certainly lacks about sending reports.

Even so, a three -week silence is unusual, even for him.

I checked that.

What do you think's happened to him?

I think he's dead.

Just a feeling you get.

Ah.

Sorry.

There's no reason why you should know regulations.

What is it?

A prospectus for Alpha Academy.

That symbol is on a Land Rover outside.

Are they watching us at the room?

The room, I imagine.

Let's go out to Alpha Academy.

English education astonishes me.

And so it should.

I hope it's following us.

Maybe they're just going back to the Academy.

Let's find out.

It's like the other side of the moon.

They're not getting out of the Land Rover.

Well, let's ring for service.

Friendly little group, aren't they?

Yes?

That's the answer. Perhaps you like the question.

What do you want? A word with your headmaster.

Have you an appointment with the commander?

No, no. We just dropped by on the off chance of seeing him.

Advise control. We're escorting visitors in.

Gate security to control.

Visitors entering.

Very well.

Proceed with escort.

Over and out.

This is just to see the commander.

By appointment?

No.

Very well.

If you wait in the commander's office, I'll inform him you're here.

Very good.

That makes you feel wanted, doesn't it?

Gave me a bit of a shock.

The

whole

thing's electrified.

Good evening.

I'm Brigadier Brett.

Good evening.

You were having some difficulty with the lock?

The door was, um, stuck.

I hate locked rooms.

The war, you know.

Yes, of course. You wanted to see me, Mr... Colonel.

Colonel John Steed. Eight, nine glances.

My wife?

No. I'm afraid, uh, I'm in civil service now.

Yes, it does happen. Won't you sit down?

Thank you.

What can I do for you? It's about our little boy, isn't it, my dear?

Oh, yes, our little boy.

Aubrey. Neville.

Aubrey, and that's... A delightful child.

How old is he?

Eighteen in June.

By John's first wife.

We're going to be shifted to the colonies, or should I say the

John doesn't want the child to be exposed to foreign influences, so we've

decided to leave him in England.

You do take them from 18 years?

From 18 to 20.

I suppose you're running a military academy.

Not at all.

The discipline is strict, of course, but you must be the first to admit,

Colonel, there's little future in today's world for a soldier.

More's the pity.

But I'm glad to see that you're putting some backbone into today's youngsters.

Today's youngsters are tomorrow's people.

Perhaps you'd like a copy of our prospectus.

Or have you already seen it?

No.

How? Mr. Grant, who's staying at the same hotel as you.

I gave him a prospectus three weeks ago. I thought you might have met.

No, of course, we only just arrived today. We're not even booked in. Just

time to look around the room.

I see.

Wasn't this the way out?

Hey!

Sorry, sir.

I tricked.

I think you've taken the wrong turn.

Oh, sure, I have a splendid sense of direction.

It's the homing pigeon in me, you know. No, I think we'll go through... No, sir.

That way. Well, that's most peculiar. I'm quite certain we came this way.

Now, let me see. When we came into the house, we turned to the right, then

left.

Lady must have stumbled, sir. Keep her head.

How's the head, the brunette one?

Still there, just.

They said you stumbled, did you?

Possibly onto something important.

What happened?

Well, I recall seeing stars.

That's not surprising if they thumped you.

No, before they hit me.

And then they were comfy -dumpy.

Sitting on a wall?

No, bobbing about in mid -air.

You really were hit.

Steve, I'm not making it up.

I really saw an inflated astronaut that looked like Humpty Dumpty.

Saw him through a window.

But there weren't any windows.

There was one behind the blackboard.

Very strange place to put one.

Exactly.

Perhaps you or Mr. Grant stumbled on the same thing.

I think that that Alpha Academy warrants another visit.

This time, I'm escorted.

We already are escorted.

What? Right behind us.

This is becoming a habit.

Then let's break them of it whilst they're still young.

They're still with us.

Hold on to your hair.

You've lost them.

Yes. Right, now let's get back to the academy and... Later.

Later?

Much later, when the hue and cry has died down. I'll pick you up at ten

We've lost them, sir.

Very well.

Return here immediately.

Colonel and Mrs. Steed have eluded our escort.

Security condition yellow.

Miss King?

Come in.

I already am.

Oh, Steve, I hope you've come prepared to go and investigate our son's future

school.

Adequately. Me too.

Look in the case.

Why the running shoes?

For beating a hasty retreat.

Have you ever looked anything?

Yes, there is just one thing.

What? A porter to carry it.

You know it's after 10 .30.

I know.

Exactly two minutes up.

I hate to remind you, but punctuality is the first requirement.

Suppose Wellington had been late for Waterloo.

He was, wasn't he?

Ah, well, there you are then.

I'm sorry.

I'm almost ready, Steve.

Good.

I've only got to wash my hair, have a shower, paint my nails and get dressed.

Of course, you could speed things up for me.

How?

You could do my hair.

Night's survival as usual, sir. Of course.

Perimeter wire, west sector, sir.

That'll be Steed and his wife.

I do hope so, sir.

We must be near the school building.

It's over on the right, I think.

This quarry almost encircles the entire place, according to the map.

Incidentally, watch how you go.

There'll be a lot of mining around here.

Look up the big hole.

Interesting.

What could have made it?

I don't know.

Certainly big.

Bigger than both of us, Miss Kidd.

What was he doing?

I don't think he was a guard.

He wasn't armed.

I wonder what that jump was for.

It's just a rabbit snare.

Let me see.

There's no way to catch rabbits.

Maybe more traps around.

I'm sure.

I've got to try and get inside the building.

I could check the grounds for you.

All right.

We'll meet back at the current hour.

I'll make it 11 .09.

Synchronize watches.

Oh.

Um, 11 .07.

Make it 11 .10.

Amen.

Thank you.

Now, you two are the only ones from your court who have not completed night

survival.

You will stay out in the survival area until dawn.

Now, you know there are dangers, traps everywhere in these grounds, but you

don't know where they are.

You also know that someone out there in the darkness is an enemy. You will seek

him and destroy him.

Exactly. You are enemies, and only one of you must return.

Any questions?

There's a yellow alert.

Yes.

Everyone you meet is an enemy and must be destroyed.

Thank you.

We have the intruder, sir.

Well done.

Any sign of Steen?

No, sir.

Security condition read.

Sir.

Take the prisoner inside.

Yes, sir.

Welcome back, Mrs. Deed.

It's not important, but it's Miss King.

As you say, it's not important. Where is Deed? I don't know.

Well, I imagine we'll find him soon enough.

Now, Miss King, you must have been out there for an hour. I congratulate you on

your powers of survival.

They're instinctive.

Did you meet up with any of our pets?

A boa constrictor. There are several.

One isn't enough.

Well, they're incurably lazy after a meal.

For example, Mr Grant.

Steve's colleague.

The Birkenstrict that Mr Grant encountered will sleep for at least

weeks. There was a scorpion as well. Oh, really?

I didn't know there were any left.

They don't do well in this climate, you know.

And two of your young men, they seem to be hunting each other.

They are.

Why? The quarry, as we call it, figures in only a small part of our curriculum,

but an essential part.

The survival course.

The quarry is our survival area.

There, it's kill or be killed.

There is a future, Miss King.

The new worlds of space hanging like ripe plums in the sky, waiting for the

first men who have the courage to snatch them.

Earth, overpopulated, underfed.

Its wealth sacked dry.

And how do you plan to reach this Earth?

Just by waiting, Miss King.

East and west are competing like schoolboys to create methods of space

transportation. When the means is available, I shall lead my armies into

new worlds and colonize them.

Your army?

My army of astronauts.

The young men and women here?

You're training astronauts?

Astronaut soldiers, to be precise.

To wage war on other astronauts?

To wipe them out, Miss King. I will invade the new territories out there.

While this world makes formal protests and looks at the rule books.

It's happened before.

Exactly, Miss King.

But it may be 50 years before space travel's made that easy.

Your army will be old by then.

Cryobiology, Miss King.

We have perfected the deep freezing of human tissues.

Already I have 80 young men and women fully trained at their mental and

peak who will grow no older.

Their lives suspended until the moment of reactivation.

In two years' time, I shall join them.

Your instinct for survival

interests me, Miss King.

What other equipment is there?

Laboratory, test chamber, gymnasiums, physical and psychological units.

Everything. And what's the tunnel?

We only go there towards the end of our training, when we're conditioned.

There is a test to find out.

Brigadier says everybody's got a secret fear.

In that tunnel, you come face to face with that fear.

This unit is on the survival course at present.

I will relieve you.

Sixty seconds later, they will start after you.

Their objective, to kill you.

I know I can rely on you, Miss King, to try to survive for as long as possible.

Ten seconds.

You may run any way you wish, Miss King. Do try to give them good chase.

Five, four...

3, 2, 1, 0.

30 seconds.

10 seconds.

5, 4.

Three, two, one, zero.

Why didn't you kill me?

The security condition read.

Deed the enemy now.

Try that door.

It's bolted.

All right.

I'll cover you.

Check the bushes.

Amen.

Knock her in. I'll report to the commander.

Colonel, I want sections B and C to the quarry exit.

You want to watch?

Thank you, sir.

She's coming to the tube.

There's someone in the quarry end of the tunnel.

Steed, using the tunnel to get into the school.

Must have had it all.

We're going in after them.

I'll send in sections B and C from the quarry end. You take in the group at the

cellar entrance.

Yes, sir.

This is Brigadier Brett.

B and C sections, go in after them.

Carton's group is in through the other end, so they can't escape.

Right away, sir.

Out. Now let's make sure it's our group that gets them first.

Inside, all of you.

Inside and fast!

Right, into the tunnel, everybody.

The other end's covered, so they're trapped.

Skin.

I thought this was one way.

Yeah,

it is a tribal harrowing, isn't it?

Can we get out that way?

No, there's a hunting party not far behind.

Well, there's one coming this way as well, so we're caught in the middle.

Exactly. Well, what are we going to do?

Miss King, have I ever let you down?

It's always a birth plan.

Telling the truth can be very destructive to a relationship.

As you can see, have a look at this plan.

No particular that feature.

Steve, you're marvelous.

Thank you.

them past you. Nobody went past Doug.

You let them get back. We never saw them.

Then they must be somewhere in the cabin.

Spread out, all of you. Find them.

Give us a hand.

Over here.

It's time to make a shot. Get after them.

I'll join you as soon as I can.

Isn't he out yet? He says it's closed off. There's a rock against it.

Get your shoulder to it. Move it.

I can't shift it. It's solid.

And they've got out into the grounds.

Well, we're all in here.

Both exits, move!

Yes?

Trump here.

Intruders have escaped.

Tunnel entrance door has been locked, sir.

Request ordered.

I'm coming down.

Big snake.

Stars in his eyes.

Head in the clouds.

Feet apart.

I get my right leg between your feet. I get my right shoulder under your right

arm. I keep my back straight. Feet parallel.

And put the opponent off balance and... Get it? Yes.

Good. Right.

Now, feet apart.

And... Bring my shoulder under you. Right. Back straight.

Back straight.

Feet apart.

Opponent off balance.

And heave.

Heave.

Oh, I'll never get the hang of it. Yes, you will. You didn't get your opponent

off balance.

Oh.

I'm sorry, Steve.

That's what I call deviant.

At least I didn't break the play glass window.

Thoughtful.

Well, what'll it be?

A quiet tête -à -tête?

Dinner in the country or a ride in the park?

Practice.