Original subtitles

You have, unfortunately, only one minute.

One minute, starting now.

Hello. Hello, Tara.

A present.

No, I found it up against your door.

It's got your name on it.

Some unknown admirer.

Snakes and Ladders.

No note.

Someone's playing a game with you.

It's odd, though. Who would send me a game of Snakes and Ladders?

Very interesting, sir.

I wonder if I might now serve tea, sir.

How about a game of snakes and ladders?

There's nothing I'd like more than a game of snakes and ladders. I thought

you said there wasn't a note.

Go immediately to the children's playground, Merton Park.

But you gain on the roundabouts, you lose on the swings.

Who was he?

Dexter, Clive Dexter.

An old friend?

No, not really. We were in the army together. I haven't seen him for years.

How did he die?

Snake bite.

Oh, it's not as mad as it sounds.

He was a zoologist.

Steve, you're not telling me something.

Cootie Gibson.

He was found dead last week.

Coincidence? He was found in a field, but his injuries show that he died in a

car accident.

And he was a racing car driver.

And the zoologist was killed by a snake bite.

Two coincidences? Three, excuse me.

This was found on Cootie's person.

Check them for me at Jig Creations.

This is the Jigsaw Center.

The center of the Jigsaw universe.

And you're the manager.

The master.

Royalty has walked through that door.

Well, I have a king -size problem.

With your jiggy?

Yes.

You've nearly finished it, and one of the pieces is missing.

Oh, worse.

I've only a few pieces, and I can't find the rest.

Yes, madam, a problem indeed.

Can you tell me what puzzle these pieces are from?

A few more pieces, I might be of some assistance.

Perhaps if madam were to search her home a little more diligently, perhaps under

the sofa.

I'll think about it.

Oh, dear, rheumatism.

Training, madam, training.

Say, ready, steady, go.

Ready, steady, go.

What do you do on long winter nights?

I ride a bicycle.

What else?

Thank you. You've been most helpful.

Goodbye.

No luck, I'm afraid. It was a pretty far -fetched idea.

What about you?

I've been checking army records.

I'm just trying to remind myself who else served with Cootie, Dexter and

When was it about?

Towards the end of the war.

Well, units were coming in and out all the time.

So many names, so many faces. Not only I could remember.

Adelman.

Hubert.

Horace. Harry.

Henry Adelman.

Was he one of the crew?

Adelman, of course it was. A, B, C.

He served with me on several... Oh, here we are. On several tribunals. Now, that

must have been about the time that Dexter and Cootie were... Henry J.

Averman. That's the one, Henry J.

I'll have to go and see him.

No use trying to phone him.

You probably have to book the call two weeks in advance.

I want you to buy at 14 and a half. No, wait.

15 ,000.

I don't care what I said before. Buy.

Hello?

Rome?

Yes?

You what?

How did that happen?

Now, Rome, that's very bad news.

You did what?

Tell me, what do I pay you for?

Very well, then do it.

Tell him to take $15 .95 and not a...

Lots of ice.

Right. Did you get a good look at him? Just a glimpse.

No one you knew?

Or would want to know.

What's that?

You said lots of ice.

I meant it for this.

Something like that on my head, it'd freeze the brain cell.

Now you sit down.

What's wrong with you?

I'm worried. I've no idea where or what's happened to Averman.

Ah, Mr.

Averman, you're coming round.

Good. Excellent.

Don't distress yourself, Mr. Averman. Take your time. Take it easy.

Make sure you're fully recovered.

I don't want to play a game against an opponent who lacks any of his faculty.

There'd be no joy in that.

Game.

I must apologize for having to abduct you, but you did turn down several

invitations to dine with me.

Busy.

Busy man.

Busy and arrogant.

You appear to be fully recovered now.

Shall we start the game?

My pills.

I must have my pills.

And you shall, if you play the game according to your potential.

Your precious pills are contained within the graph in front of you. One end of

the graph is sealed. The other, that is the peak, is open.

The pills will be ejected as and when the market reaches peak. You understand?

I must have my pills!

The papers give you current stock market prices, and the teleprinter and the

phones will give you second -by -second changes in those prices. You will buy or

sell accordingly. Your empire does grow or crack. And you have

four minutes starting now.

Four minutes, Mr. Abelman.

Oh, perhaps I should have made it clear. If you win the game, you'll walk from

here a free man. If you lose, your pills remain where they are, with the

resultant loss of your life.

Three minutes, 32 seconds, Mr. Abelman.

Note by Universal.

Sell. Dale Iron.

Note sell.

Hello?

Sell.

Sell.

Sell.

And keep selling.

Hello? Option? Yes, take an option and hold.

Hold.

Yes.

Sell. Sell. Sell.

And keep selling. Now, wait a minute. Wait.

Buy. Buy.

Buy. No sell.

Sell.

I'm afraid the strain was too much for him, sir.

No sign of him.

I see.

Well, keep checking.

Nobody's seen neither hide nor hair of Averman. He seems to have disappeared

into thin air.

Not your last on the slings.

You'll lose on the roundabouts.

So far.

Mostly sky.

A few trees and the house, I think.

Well, a building of some kind, isn't it?

Gibson and Dexter, now Averman.

It's always the same, pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

The same puzzle.

A deliberate clue.

From the victims.

Or the killer.

Three men, no present connection.

Except those jigsaw pieces.

Which takes us into the past.

And into the army.

Did he, is it?

So you remember, Brigadier.

May I introduce Miss Sarah King, Brigadier Wishful Throne.

Delighted. Hello.

To what do I owe the pleasure?

Just thought we'd drop in.

I thought for a minute.

The enemy was putting up some sort of diversional attack.

We never fail nowadays.

Halt!

Who are the enemy?

Me. Or rather, the 2nd Battalion, which is me, if you'll follow my meaning.

Overall command.

The secret of a successful exercise.

Even if both sides belong to you?

Absolutely, my dear lady.

Look after some tea.

Thank you. In times of war, one must observe the formalities.

Well, I haven't seen you since the last reunion.

What brings you here?

Gibson, Dexter and Averman.

Oh, yes.

Or perhaps you'd know them as Captain Gibson and Dexter and Major Averman.

Old comrades, yes.

Then you do remember.

No. The only chappie and teller be printed on my memory is Steve here.

And that mainly on account of that incident with the colonel's daughter at

Montana. Well,

what's the connection, this Dexter, Gibson and Averman chappie? What's it

about? They're all dead.

Oh, dear.

One lump or two.

Were you wondering if you remembered anyone who served with them during the

Well, it's a bit tough, that thing. I don't really remember them.

But you could think about it.

Yes, I could.

Now, forgive me.

I really must take that hill by 5 .30.

But I'll think about it. Fine. We'll call on you later this evening.

It's not tonight. Pressing dinner engagement.

Tomorrow?

Don't. Over by the bunker.

I really must take that hill.

Charge!

I thought we already had that hill.

Don't dash off. Finish your tea.

Brigadier Wishforth Brown, I'm expected.

Indeed you are, sir. May I take your hat and stick it?

This way, sir.

Brigadier Wishforth Brown, sir.

My dear Brigadier, how nice of you to come.

Awfully nice of you to ask me.

Well, I thought we might dine immediately and then savour a brandy and

leisure. Sounds fine, fine.

I'm game for anything.

Game for anything.

Yes.

Steed?

Steed! What's wrong?

Oh, nothing. Just we said we'd meet the Brie dear at dawn, and it's almost dawn

now. Dawn? It's only midnight.

You don't mean my anti -magnetic, shock -proof, waterproof, chronometer -timed

watch has stopped.

I'll make some coffee. I'll make the coffee.

Midnight? The brigadier won't have started his first brandy by now.

Superb meal.

Thank you.

Absolutely first class.

I didn't mind telling you when your invitation first came.

Right out of the blue, I said to myself, what does a chap like that want?

Missing a bite with a rough old soldier lady like me for her?

I am by nature something of a recluse.

Although I make a point of keeping in touch with various aspects of the

world, it prevents my mind from becoming closed.

Broad horizons, broad base, good thinking.

Thank you.

But now we relax.

Surely, Lord.

Might I suggest a little game?

Purely recreational.

An hour or so of friendly competition.

Absolutely delighted, old boy.

Ah, battle stations.

A reasonable choice for the professional soldier, don't you think?

Right up my jolly old strata.

Now, with your particular capabilities, your chances of winning must be, what,

evens? Playing for money, are we? Money? Oh, no, no, not money.

Evens, Brigadier.

That's very fair.

Even you must agree that's very fair.

I, uh... Much fairer than a six to one against.

That's what you gave me.

Gave you? Me.

Oh, it wasn't Montebristo then, of course. I had another name, quite

name.

Who am I, Brigadier?

Don't you recognize me?

Six to one against.

Be serious.

Deadly serious, Brigadier.

It's preposterous.

Dexter, Gibson and Averman shared your view at first.

Dexter, Gibson, Averman.

You mean the... Aye.

But for wasting time, I've explained the rules. The prime objective is for you

to take the hill.

It will be a test of skill and strategy.

And you have, unfortunately, only one minute.

One minute, Brigadier.

Starting now.

Steady, steady, steady.

Excellent.

Excellent.

He's really entering into the spirit of the thing. The best to date, sir.

Yes.

Yes.

A splendid effort, but I think not.

Fault me then.

Where did I go wrong?

You failed to scout out the land.

That hill straight ahead.

You overlooked your enemy's artillery.

I can't see it.

Move a little to your left, then.

Aunt Emily's battered, brassy, ancient alarm clock with one hand missing tells

me that dawn approaches.

Oh. So it's time we kept our appointment with a fucking ear.

Almost halfway there.

We're sunk without more pieces.

Uh -huh.

Well, why don't we try this?

Sergeant Daniel Edmund. He was court -martialed in 1946 in Germany for

the black market.

He was tried by six officers, four of whom are now dead.

Gibson, Dexter.

Abberman and Wishworth Brown.

So Edmund is the link.

Where's he now?

Missing.

Believed killed while trying to escape from detention 15 years ago.

Believed killed.

That's what I thought.

You said there were six officers at the court -martial. I've located a fifth,

Professor Ex -Major Whitney.

Professor? Shall I wear my gym slip?

I would if I were you.

I'm looking for Professor Whitney.

He's not here.

Greek. Have you any idea where he is?

In London.

You don't know exactly where?

He has a dinner engagement back tomorrow.

Thank you.

You know, it's really marvelous the way he speaks Greek.

Like a native.

So fluid. He has a distinct advantage.

What? He is Greek.

It's English. He's studying.

I've got a list of all the scholastic organizations in the country.

Right. Prefer the witness dining with someone. Let's hope it's his academical

colleague.

If I remember correctly, you said there were six members of the court -martial.

That's right.

Well, Whitney's only number five.

Right again.

Don't you think we should start looking for the last one, number six?

I already know.

May I speak to the headmaster, please?

You already know?

I've known for some time.

Right, I'll wait.

Well, who is it?

Me.

Yes, I'm number six on the list. Oh.

Good afternoon. I'm trying to trace Professor Whitney.

Is he by any chance dining with you tonight?

Well, can you tell me where he might be dining?

A glass of brandy. Oh, yes, please.

Cigar?

No, thank you. I have my pipe.

Thank you.

You know, I envy you, Professor.

Oh. Surely not.

Scholar, the man of letters, the mind.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that.

Tell me, Professor, do we shape our destinies, or does destiny shape us?

The fault, dear Bristow, Brutus, lies not in our stars, but in ourselves.

I wonder.

Take me, for example. Did I create myself, or did others create me?

I am what I am, yes?

Yes. I would have thought you were an excellent example of the self -made man.

Excuse me. Some lecture notes.

Terrible memory.

There again we differ. I have a vivid memory.

Extremely vivid.

Yes, you... You mentioned a game earlier.

Your memory is improving, Professor.

Yes, I like to choose the game according to my opponent.

You are a literary man. What better than a word -making game?

Something amusing?

No, no, no, no. I was just thinking... You were just thinking that such a game

would be child's play to a man like yourself.

Not such child's play, Professor. Or should I say, Major Whitney?

The luck of the game, old chap. Isn't that what that fool Averman said?

The luck of the game.

Averman?

Yes, I knew an Averman once.

The army. Yes, well, he played my game, but unfortunately luck wasn't with him.

Averman?

Game.

Hello, Professor Whitney.

Yes.

Oh. Oh, he isn't in. I see. Well, thank you.

I've tried every number I can think of. No Professor Whitney.

But Tara, is it really necessary to build up these defenses?

You're number six on the list. And you're a very valuable and unique

And you must be very well looked after.

You're mad.

I'm not playing your silly game.

Oh. but you are, Major, to my rules.

Observe the letters above you.

Seven letters to make a word of not less than six letters.

There is also a time limit.

Two minutes.

With the control you will find in front of you, you can rearrange the letters to

your choice.

Two minutes, Major Whitney.

Two minutes starting now.

No, you're not seeing things. The ceiling is descending.

It will continue to do so until you find the key word.

Find it and the ceiling will automatically stop.

One minute forty -five.

Ah, good. You've decided to enter into the spirit of the game. Excellent.

I can't think. I can't think.

Nonsense, Major. It's child's play, remember?

Ah, very interesting, Major. I can see a word chipping up already.

Stop it, will you?

I can't think.

I can't think.

Yes, indeed. A very appropriate word, Major.

Because your time is...

Boys and girls come out to play. Whitney's dead.

Hip, hip, hooray.

Steed.

John Steed. Yes, sir.

You know the bait to use?

Yes, sir.

I know her.

Averman?

Whitney?

No, it's just Steed.

Well, it's all a game, really.

Thing is, are we the players?

Or are we the pawns?

Any luck with army records?

Question, then, is a parcel not a parcel? When it's complete.

The lady is accommodated, sir. Everything is coming to a most

conclusion.

Now there's only one.

John Deere.

Tara?

One must have made it. It is not in my records.

Well, couldn't you take it again?

No need, sir, I assure you. I know every jiggy produced in this country. In the

world. This one I have never seen before. It therefore does not exist.

Would you have another look at it?

As I've already said.

One moment. Well.

This house. I recognize it.

The jiggy convention of 64.

This is where it was held.

One of our leading manufacturers.

That's it. This is the residence of Mr. Bristow, the game king.

I'm glad you were able to find us with such alacrity. You were expecting me?

Naturally, sir. The young lady, Miss King, is waiting for you. Oh, good.

Any pleasant weather for the time of the year, sir?

My dear Steed, won't you let my man take your hat? I wouldn't like to put him to

all that trouble.

Of course, you've met before.

Of course.

Anyway, glad you came.

Couldn't resist it.

I made sure of that.

Do let me introduce myself.

Daniel Edmund.

Sergeant Edmund.

Bristow, actually.

Monte Bristow.

Oh, you've changed your name as well as your face.

Ah, but let me reassure you, underneath the mind ticks on in just the same way.

Where's Miss King?

Perfectly safe.

Under glass, in fact.

A drink for Major Steve.

I'll get it.

Oh, you don't trust me.

Go ahead, help yourself.

By all means.

So does that.

Thank you.

Oh, cheers.

Cheers.

Not too much trouble finding your way here, I hope. Not too much trouble.

Although, without my help, you wouldn't have had a clue.

I felt that you were pointing the way. I wanted you to be last.

Oh, thank you.

Of course I could have put all my eggs in one basket. I could have eliminated

all six of you just like that. But then I thought, no.

I'll do it their way. I'll play a little game with them just as they played a

game with me.

You were guilty.

True.

You were caught and paid the penalty.

Or should have paid the penalty.

You know, I'm grateful to you.

If I hadn't met the six of you, I wouldn't be where I am today.

Where's Miss King?

Patient.

More whiskey, sir. Thank you.

Your conferver, Miss King, is splendid.

Absolutely splendid.

I think there's room for cautious optimism, sir. Yes. You want her? You

her.

A game, Steed. You and I are going to play a little game.

I'm playing no... No game.

My dear fellow, you already are.

A five to one chance against your choosing the drugs decanter.

Fair, wouldn't you say?

Of course, I was gambling on your choosing the brandy.

Our game has begun, Steve.

The others played for their lives, whereas you in your profession, your

cheap, you should have no store by it.

But Miss King, let us hope her life means a little more, do you?

Your Majesty, a six.

You have six minutes in which to win or lose.

Our game of super secret agent.

An appropriate choice, don't you think?

I devised a game myself.

It's not particularly complex, but it calls upon all the qualities required of

secret agent.

Courage, strategy, a certain degree of animal cunning.

And, of course, embodied in the game is that traditional element of all five

sagas, the damsel in distress.

Six minutes, please. The game has started.

Six minutes before Miss King's up again.

Six minutes before the sand fills the lower glass.

Miss King can be reached, but only after you have played the game, after you

have mounted certain obstacles.

Well done.

Brother. Well played.

You've earned a reward.

Problem two.

activated, you will have 60 seconds to open the safe and throw the defusing

switch.

60 seconds starting now.

Twelve seconds, Majesty.

Ten.

Nine. Eight.

Seven.

Six. Five.

Four. Three.

Two. One.

It is a rule of the game, sir.

You have a gun, Steed, but you still need something to put in it.

Of your selective powers.

Six doors, Major Steed. One is harmless, but the other flies.

Major Steed.

Oh, yes. Empty for the moment.

But you're nearing the end of the game.

Don't forget what awaits you.

This way, Major Steed.

Time we have him. There's time.

He's got further than anyone,

sir. The game isn't over yet.

The hardest part of the course, Deed.

Six assailants.

at six second intervals.

Six bullets, but only one is live.

Cheat! You cheated! You cheated!

Cheat! Cheat! Cheat!

Get in there and stop them.

Gamesmanship, Major Steed.

I congratulate you.

But you're not the only player who has a card up his sleeve.

One final trick.

The master card, Major Steed. The master.

Game set and match.

Ah, good.

Steed. Move to set. Oh, Denathra.

Steed. Freeze. Steed.

You were saying?

The last time I threw a five, you said I had to move back to the beginning.

That's right. You didn't throw one before.

One what?

Four. Well, you never said anything about a four. Oh, yes, I did.

Six. Oh, good. I get an answer.

But I haven't had a go yet.

Yes, you have.

Oh, well, one. And then you said I had to pay a fourth.

That's right. You missed six goes.

I don't understand this game.

What? Carefully. Now I throw the five.

Three. One, two, three. There you are. See? You owe me a pound.

What?

I am on a red square.

You never said anything about a red square. First time round, black square.

Second time round, red square. Your turn.

Mine? Yours.

Six? Bad luck. Not a pound.

Oh, what is this game?

Well, surely you've played it before.

No, I haven't. What's it called?

Theodopoly.

Oh, bad luck!