Original subtitles

Nice day, Hubert.

Ah.

It is a nice day.

Yesterday was nice, too.

Ah.

Yesterday was a nice day.

Might rain though.

Oh, I don't know.

You might be right, Hubert.

Funny old day.

Might rain.

Steve. Major Paul Croft. John Keith.

I'm sorry. I haven't a hand to offer you. Come in, Major. Delighted to see

at last.

How was the trip?

He was two hours late.

Held up in Karachi?

Runaway elephant.

No, no. An elephant on the runway.

Very old and very tame. No drama, I'm afraid.

Steve, how do you do? Do sit down, won't you? Thank you.

I've heard a lot about you.

Puts us on equal terms, then.

Mrs. Peel has been talking about you all week.

Oh? I've been looking forward to seeing you again.

I gather you've known each other for a long time.

Since I was seven.

Six. She was a leggy little horror with pigtails. I can't believe it.

Oh, it's true.

We lived next door to each other. I often used to climb over the wall and...

no. I mean the champagne. I specifically asked my vintner for a 26.

He sent me a 27.

What's the digit between friends?

Well, on his first day home...

After years of defending some far -flung corner of the British Empire, he

deserves a more than special vintage.

Oh, the 27 will be fine, Steed, really.

And you don't have to call me Major.

Not anymore.

Oh? It's a fact.

I'm resigning my commission.

I've bought a little house in the country. I'm going to settle down and

things. Breed horses or something.

Oh, that's marvellous. Where is this place?

Just outside Little Storping.

Little Storping.

I don't know it. Neither do I.

I bought the place sight unseen.

I saw an advert in the Times.

Sounded just the sort of place I wanted, so I took a chance.

Despite the year, I hope the temperature will prove acceptable.

Thank you. Thank you.

So, you're going on to Little Storping later?

Yes. Forbes has gone on ahead to tidy up.

Forbes? Private Forbes? Is he still with you?

Oh, yes.

After all these years, I still can't get rid of the beer -soaked rascal.

He ought to be there by now. Knowing him, he's probably stopped off for a

at the local pub.

We've had some good times, the Major and me.

Father, it's nearly 12 o 'clock.

Is it now?

I'd better be moving then before the Major starts chasing after me.

I thought you said you had him trained properly.

Father, you know there's an event at 12 o 'clock.

Oh, I'd forgotten.

An event.

Local carnival or something.

Anything worth watching?

Oh, no, no. No, nothing really interesting, really.

Well?

You're not going yet, are you? Not without another.

No. Of course he's not.

Particularly as this one's on the house.

Well,

but it's the last one, mind?

I must say, this is a friendly little place.

Ah, we don't get many strangers passing through.

Off the beaten track, you see.

Hardly anyone knows it's here. What exactly is this event, then?

Pardon? An event.

At twelve, you said?

Did you hear that?

Hear what?

Gunshots. Sounded like gunshots.

Gunshots?

Gunshots? Do you hear anything like that, Hubert?

No, you are.

Gunshots.

Eh?

Seem to come from right outside.

Probably a car backfiring or just your imagination.

Well, I really must be going this time.

See you again, perhaps.

Next time you're passing through.

You'll see me sooner than that.

And more often.

Moving into the area.

Moving in?

Yeah.

Permanently? That's right.

Just taking the old house on the hill.

Emma, you know, I could just as easily hire a car. I wouldn't hear of it. A

stubborn streak.

It's quite a way. Fine. I feel like a drive.

It's been a long time, Paul. We've got a lot to talk about. Besides, I want to

see this new house of yours.

It's not new. It's just a big, honest country house.

Come to give me a hand, have you?

That's what I call neighborly.

Really neighborly.

Careful with that, though.

Valuable.

I told you to be careful.

That was clumsy, Hubert.

Ah.

Wonder what's in that box, Hubert.

Oh, ah.

Now there's a funny thing.

Did you notice that man back there?

Frederick Williams.

Big financier. Or at least he was.

Sorry. I've been out of touch for quite a while.

Well, his empire crumbled a few weeks ago. He was virtually ruined.

What's funny about that?

Did you notice the driver of the big limousine we passed a few miles back?

Thick set, chap.

Samuel Morgan.

The man who slipped the financial knife into Williams.

Quite a coincidence.

Out -of -the -way spot like this?

And two of the deadliest enemies within a mile or so of each other.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate all this, Emma.

The places I've lived in the last few years, lonely, remote places, most of

them.

Well, you lose the knack of dealing with people.

This way, you're helping to ease me gently back into civilization.

He must have got drunk.

Raving drunk.

Forbes!

I'll personally take hold of his scraggy little neck. Paul, you don't know

what's happened here. You don't even know if it was him. Of course it was

I've warned him before about drinking a hundred times.

I mean, who else would... Well, he doesn't seem to be here.

He's probably skulking in the bushes somewhere.

Or else gone back to get recharged.

I'm going to check the pub.

I'll roust him out.

Paul!

You stay here.

Good afternoon, sir.

Can I help you? Yes.

I'm looking for a man called Forbes.

About so high, neat -looking fellow, clean -shaven.

Sorry? You didn't even stop to think.

I don't know anyone named Forbes, and that means he's a stranger, and I

seen a stranger all week.

He must have been here. He couldn't have resisted it.

What's the trouble? This gentleman's looking for a... A man called Forbes.

About medium height, dapper -looking chap. Perhaps you've seen him around the

village. I've told the gentleman we've seen no strangers, Father.

That's quite right. I'm sorry we can't help you. How about you, Mickle? Well, I

can add nothing to what Jennifer has already told you.

Perhaps he thinks our Jenny's lying.

I tell you, I had a mysterious message to meet someone here.

I was to learn something to my advantage.

Financial advantage.

Mr. Morgan, I suggest you wait a little longer.

Listen, I've wasted enough time.

If anyone does turn up, give them one of those.

Amen.

I think she's coming round.

The brandy did the trick.

Are you feeling better?

I'm Dr. Haynes.

You've been lucky.

No bones broken.

But you've taken a rather nasty bump.

Would have been nastier.

If she'd hit that wall.

Yes, she must have skidded past it by inches.

Wall?

Skidded. See for yourself.

I don't remember driving back.

I was with Forbes.

There was nobody else in the car when we pulled you out. I'd just found his

body.

Somebody had murdered him with a sickle.

Sit down, you'll feel better. I didn't imagine it.

He was there, in the grounds of Paul's house.

Paul? Who's Paul?

Major Croft.

He was coming here. You must have seen him.

I don't know what's happening here, but I do know I found Forbes dead.

And then something hit me.

She's more badly hurt than you suspected, Doctor.

There's a dead man in the grounds of Paul's house.

If you don't believe me, why don't you come and see for yourself?

It's a waste of time.

You seem very sure of your facts.

I am.

Are you coming?

Come now, Doctor.

All right.

I'll come with you.

You better take my car.

Paul went berserk when he saw the wreckage. He just wasn't thinking

Jumped to the first assumption.

The Forbes had got drunk.

Mind you, one can hardly blame him.

He saw those beautiful things just destroyed.

Where are we supposed to find the body?

Higgins. Dr.

Ames.

You gave me a scare, sir.

I must have doled off.

You know this man?

Oh, yes. Everybody knows him.

Best chopping gardener in the village.

Went his wake.

What are you doing here?

While looking after the gardens, of course.

For Major Croft? I don't know anyone named Croft.

No, the estate agents asked me to keep the place a bit tidy.

Just in case they ever sell it.

But it has been sold.

Well, the important question is, how long have you been sleeping here?

Well, uh, since about 12 .30, I'd say.

But he can't have been... The whole time. Afraid so.

You know me, Doctor.

Heavy sleeper.

I shouldn't worry about it, you know.

This sort of thing happens.

A bow on the head can lead to all sorts of things.

Amnesia. Even hallucinations.

They'll soon pass.

Look, my surgery's not far from here. It's on the road out. If you'd like to

call in there with me, I'll give you some pills.

Can you give me an explanation, too?

Oh, no. That I'm afraid I can't do.

You press that little one, you might set it on fire.

Nice -looking motor.

Oh, did you find a body, then?

I'll take you up on that offer.

The pills.

Oh.

Yes, okay, fine.

Well, it's not far. Follow me.

Do you mind?

You just take two of these four times a day. May I use your phone?

Yes, sure.

What about the pills?

Oh, they were only an excuse. I didn't want them to hurt the fact.

Operator? What do you mean, them?

The men in the village.

One of them was wearing Paul's watch.

Oh, now, come on. Look, if I can persuade you to take a sedative... I'm

perfectly all right.

Hello, operator?

Get me the police, please.

Police? That's right. Get me the nearest police station and please hurry.

One moment, please.

Well, I hope you know what you're doing.

I know. I can't support you over this, you know.

Medically, you're suffering from... County police?

Hello, police?

Sergeant Banks here. Can I help you? You certainly can. I'd like to report a

murder. A murder?

Possibly, too.

Your name?

Mrs. Emma Peel.

Where are you phoning from, Mrs. Peel?

Dr... Hames.

Dr. Hames' surgery, Little Storping.

This is ridiculous.

I've known the people of this village more than half my life. Since you were

years old?

That's how long I've known Paul Croft.

It's a strange story, Mrs. Beale.

Very strange.

You've probably heard stranger.

Not many.

No, not many.

You say you went up to the house with her and saw nothing?

No, nothing.

I'm sorry, but that is the truth.

Well, don't worry about it.

We'll soon get to the bottom of all this. Take a run up there and make a

thorough check.

I can contact you here later.

Oh, you're welcome to stay.

Oh, but surely oughtn't I to go and... From now on, it's police business, Mrs.

Peel. I think we can handle it.

The watch.

I forgot to tell him about Paul's watch.

Did you catch him in time?

Well, that little tidbit about the watch must have added credibility to your

story. Have you ever seen him before?

Banks? No, no, he must be the county police. Are you all right, Mrs. Peel? I

think you ought to lie down and have a rest. So you wouldn't know if he were a

policeman or not?

Oh, now, look, you saw him arrive in a police car and wearing uniform.

And patterned socks.

Did you ever see a uniformed policeman wearing brightly colored patterned

I see.

What are you doing?

Calling the hospital.

It appears the blow on the head has caused more trouble than I anticipated.

Oh, no, you don't.

Sorry, Doctor, thanks for the hospitality and all that, but you're not

lump me off to a hospital and...

Call a meeting.

An emergency meeting.

Sorry about that.

God bless you.

Something's got to be done.

And quickly.

Well, I gained us a bit of time. I told her to stay put at Hames' place.

And we've got Maggie to thank for that.

Yes. She'd lost her head when this Peel woman started asking for the police.

Well done, Maggie.

Well, don't forget I helped, too.

Maggie's first thought was to contact me.

That's only because you're the only one that'll fit into that uniform.

Now, just a minute.

Look, we're wasting time.

What we're here for is to decide what are we going to do about Mrs. Peel.

Where's Hames?

After all, he called this meeting, didn't he? Yes, that's quite right.

he?

Mrs. Peel.

She's gone away.

There she is.

Get the helicopter.

I'm afraid it's no use.

We've all of us tried.

But I'm afraid these old things were made to last.

Where is this place?

Little Stopping Museum.

I often used to help the curator here.

Forgive me. My name is Purser.

Jeremy Purser.

I was once the vicar here.

This is George Miller.

He was the police sergeant for this district.

This?

Mr. Chapman, the local magistrate.

How do you do?

Oh, and Hillary. She ran the telephone exchange.

They thought she was yelling too much. They?

You mean there's madmen outside?

Oh, they're not mad.

What is going on here?

Little Stopping has become a boom town.

What happened?

Little Stopping seemed doomed.

And we had all met.

To write its epitaph.

And then it happened.

What happened?

Two strangers.

Two men we'd never seen before.

They came out of the pub.

They were arguing.

And then one took out a gun and killed the other.

We saw the whole thing from the window.

He committed murder in front of the whole village. In front of all those

witnesses. And you?

You went out and arrested him? He came into us. That's when he offered us the

deal. What deal?

He was a rich man.

Very rich.

He offered us one million pounds to be equally divided amongst the whole

village. If we promised to keep our mouths shut about what we'd seen.

And then?

Well, it was a tempting offer.

Particularly coming when it did.

Surely it wasn't taken seriously.

Oh, but it was.

Deadly furious.

Of course, Miller, myself, Hillary and the vicar there did our best to talk

out of it.

But they insisted that it was put to the vote. And it was carried.

There were only four dissenters.

Us four.

They took the money?

The whole village, as one man. They all connived at murder.

Dr Haynes swore the victim had died of a heart attack, and the murderer had as

many witnesses as he needed to prove it. He bought an entire community.

The perfect crime.

But since then... Well, then the seeds were sown, weren't they?

A million divided wasn't enough. The people had tasted money.

They became greedier.

So they held another meeting. And agreed to offer the same service to others.

For a fat fee, you can lure your enemy to this village and then kill him at

and get away with it. The town's wide open.

Anything can happen in Little Scorpion. Anything at all.

You can't just stand by and let the nightmare continue.

I told you, we have tried.

But our predicament is an impossible one. Nothing's impossible.

Mrs. Peel, we've come to a decision about you.

You're to disappear.

You are never in, little Stormy.

I wish that were true.

There is a slight problem. We've checked up on Croft's papers.

He and his man only just arrived in this country. So nobody's going to miss

them. But you, Mrs. Peel, we know very little about you.

Shall I give you a thumbnail sketch?

Who knows you're here, Mrs. Peel?

Who's going to miss you?

I make her talk.

Yes.

She's all yours.

You could spare yourself this, Mrs. Peel.

You know what we want.

Who knows you're here?

Isn't that enough?

Hames!

Let her up.

All right.

I'll tell you.

Who knows you're here?

Only one person.

Who?

John.

My husband.

Hello?

John, darling.

It's Emma.

Mrs... Don't be silly, darling. Your wife.

Johnsy Wansy's fine.

But you sound as though you've been soaking up just a tiny bit too much

juice. You haven't been out all day.

You really should, darling. Drive out. Take the children with you.

Children?

You're in trouble, aren't you?

That's right.

Is there somebody listening?

Yes, and I've had an absolutely tortuous day.

Oh.

Would you mind telling me where you are?

No, darling, that would be silly.

Are you a little stormy? Yes, I had some trouble with my car. I had to drive

over to... Salisbury.

To Salisbury. I'm calling from there.

That's what they want me to think.

That's right, darling.

Kiss little Albert for me, and Julian, and Gordon, and baby Brian.

Can you give me a clue, a hint, anything?

Don't forget, you promised to take them to the museum.

You can do that after you've been to the pub. That's enough. The pub and the

museum?

You want me to meet you in the pub at Little Stormy?

Goodbye, darling.

Mrs. Peel.

Excellent.

We're in the clear.

She was in Salisbury when she disappeared. Take them to the museum

been to the pub.

Pub and museum.

Well, now, Mrs. Peel.

We shall have to deal with you later, after dark.

What else do you have in mind?

I'll tell you what I got in mind.

I'll tell you what I got in mind.

Just a little helicopter ride over the sea and a long drop down.

I was admiring your old customs.

Oh, good evening. I'd like a pint of your very best ale, please.

Oh, right away.

Nice little place.

Oh, we like it, sir.

Just passing through, are you, sir?

Yes, just passing through.

I thought I might have a look in your museum.

Thank you.

You do have a museum?

Yes. We have one. Oh.

Quite a nice one, in fact.

But I'm afraid it's shut at this time of night.

Oh, dear, and I've driven all this way. I was thinking perhaps I could get hold

of the curator, persuade him to show me around.

Oh, uh, that's impossible.

He's away for several weeks.

The place will be all locked up for some time.

Dear me, what a pity.

Mrs. Emma Peel.

Wanted to see your reaction.

I'll leave you to tidy up.

Steed. Mrs. Peel.

Are you all right?

So far.

Be with you in a moment, gentlemen.

Now, where shall I start?

Your advice.

I went to the pub.

The landlord was extremely inhospitable. He came at me with a 12 ball.

I hadn't even criticized the beer.

The whole village is crooked. The only people you can trust are those you can

see here.

Oh?

How do you do?

Oh.

It may surprise you to know that I've had very little experience with this

of garment.

Ah!

Ah!

I told them you were a wiz with locks.

No.

the telephone exchange, right?

Well, this time you're going to put through a genuine call.

A little stalking is finished and you've got a great deal to tell the

authorities. This will be something to tell the children.

Hmm? Little Julian, Albert Gordon and baby Brian.

I

don't

know why you had to put it on in the first place.

You were there, you thought for yourself, for protection.

And on that occasion, it served its purpose.

True.

Not only are we going to be late for this party, but the ambassador is going

take it as a personal affront.

Oh? We all know his reputation as a womanizer, but to turn up in armor

very inconvenient.

You're telling me I couldn't find a dress to match it. Ah, maybe we could

it off as one of the latest Paris fashions.

Steve, will you please?

Hold on.

Ready? Mm -hmm. I'll do the very best I can.

What we really need is a safe cracker.

There.

That's perfectly simple. You just haven't adjusted it properly.

All you have to do is to slip it into place.

Pop. Like that.

And when you want to remove it, you...

Mrs. Peele.

Mrs. Peele.

My knight in shining armor.

Have a sip.