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What's with the foam head?
I was wondering what I'd look like with a beard.
And then I noticed my dog was shedding a lot, so I thought, hey!
Dog beard?
Makes sense.
Hey, have you guys seen this?
They're casting for the school play Romeo and Juliet.
Again? Every year.
Why does Principal Mons like a play about star -crossed lovers so much?
Maybe she lost her love at a young age. Or maybe she's too cheap to buy new
costumes.
Either way, it's a tragedy.
I hate Shakespeare.
Okay, we get it. They're in love. Can we all just talk normal now?
I got the part. I'm going to be Juliet.
I can't wait. It's such an amazing play. The only problem is they can't find a
Romeo. Boys are so weird about kissing scenes.
What now?
Saints do not move, though grand for prayer's sake.
Then move not, while my prayers affect I take.
You know what? I'm going to go check out those auditions. See what's up. No
biggie.
Yes, that is how you wear a dog beard.
You going to the auditions?
Maybe.
Are you?
Maybe.
It's perfect.
It took them 11 years to build the original Taj Mahal. It only took me
weeks to get a picture to document my glory.
are supposed to go another hour, but I have to go pick up my cat.
Or mother.
Well, one of them is having their glands expressed, and neither likes to be kept
waiting. So, congratulations!
You're my Romeo!
Oh!
Asher! That outfit is perfect!
Let Freddie wear it for the production.
I can't believe we're doing Romeo and Juliet again.
Wish we could do something cool like Hamilton.
You saw Hamilton?
No. It sold out forever.
It's the greatest musical. Nobody can get tickets to see it.
I know. I listen to the soundtrack all the time. I want to be the next Lin
-Manuel Miranda.
He took this boring old story from history and turned it into this amazing
-hop musical.
But apparently all we ever do is Romeo and Juliet.
There once was another play done at this school.
It was based on the Alamo.
The biggest battle in Texas history.
That's perfect.
That's my Hamilton.
Oh, no, that play is cursed.
I swore an oath that I would never speak of it again.
Well, Gary, if you... Anyway, the story goes like this.
Many years ago, the children were going to do the Alamo play. The auditorium was
packed with proud parents. The curtain went up.
And then it happened.
The guy who was sworn to silence is very chatty.
What? What happened?
I shouldn't be telling this story.
Anyway, it turns out there were termites.
During the Battle of the Alamo, the entire cast fell through the stage.
That's not really a curse. That's just one idea. Tornadoes, measles, power
outages. But the worst was the year they decided to do it all on roller skates.
That was terrible.
Did someone get hurt?
No, it was just terrible. The reviews were scathing.
Finally, Principal Mullins and I packed all the Alamo costumes and props in a
big trunk, locked them away where no one would ever see them again, and I swore
I would never tell any soul of the whereabouts.
Where is it, Gary?
I just said I can't tell you.
So here's a map.
This basement is creepy.
Yeah. It reminds me of that movie.
Don't go in the school basement.
I still have nightmares about that.
Okay, let's go.
Locker 13.
This is it.
Looks like a 1908 Bavarian recessed Humber lock.
It's a tough one. But maybe I can pick it up... Or we can do that.
The cursed chest of the Alamo.
Whoa.
This is awesome.
Oh, sweet.
Did I get any on me?
Oh, there's something weird about this lid.
It's a secret compartment.
This is ancient.
Like before 1980.
There's some kind of writing here, but it's too faded to read.
Well, I don't think this is a prop at all.
This thing looks real.
It could be a huge discovery.
There's enough props and costumes in here that we could actually pull this
But not the old Alamo play we used to do. A new one that I will write. Can you
really write a brilliant historical play where the actors wrap all their
dialogue in three days?
Yo, throw me a word. I'm breaking the curse. Even if I go home in a hearse,
be first.
I'm a walk the walk gal, and so I'm not doing no Romeo. I'm bringing this to
life and calling it Rock Alamo.
Sounds good.
That play is cursed and should never be performed.
We're doing the play, Gary.
This is so exciting. We're going to be in Romeo and Juliet together.
I'm pretty stoked. I figure we should jump right into rehearsal after class.
What do you say we start with, I don't know, act one, scene five?
The kissing scene?
Is it?
I've got great news.
Romeo and Juliet is off.
Huh?
That's terrible news. I was the lead in that. We're doing a hip -hop musical
version of the Alamo, like Hamilton.
You got tickets to Hamilton?
No, I'm writing my own Hamilton.
Wait, were there even girls at the Alamo?
Who cares? It's everyone's history.
And summer, you're going to be the lead, the hero of the Alamo, Davy Crockett.
The lead? Now it's great news.
Is there Mrs. Crockett? No.
I'm so inspired.
The lyrics are just coming out of me.
I came here from Tennessee to take on the menace. We volunteers. Got no fears.
Let them come near us and then we'll see. Santa and his army like a rocket to
block it. We'll lock it away in our pocket until we shock it. By the way, my
name is Crockett.
That was awesome.
This is going to be great. You're never going to be able to convince Principal
Mullins to switch plays.
I'll convince her. Those valiant defenders of the Alamo died so I could
show on.
Probably some other reason, too. I'm going to have to do some research.
You should do a song about the Tennessee Volunteers.
Or have Davy Crockett sing to his rifle, Old Betsy.
Well, this new play is going to be amazing.
Sure is.
Hey, I just remembered I have to go somewhere for that thing about stuff.
Sounds legit. Better get going.
Principal Mullins, please. We have to do Romeo and Juliet.
I just can't think of... Freddy, Freddy, calm down.
Okay? It's okay. We're going to do Romeo and Juliet just like we do every year.
And we're going to replace the sword fights with a short speech on sharing,
like we do every year.
You should go try on your costume.
Yes! Oh, man, that's awesome.
I just really love Shakespeare.
What do you think, Mr. Finn?
It's pretty faded.
But if I'm not mistaken, this is a signature.
This is signed by General Santa Anna.
The leader of the Mexican army? How can you know for sure?
Trust me, I know.
I can see the headlines now. Two student historians find big deal document.
Girls kicking themselves.
They weren't interested earlier.
I can't make out the rep.
But you know who can help?
My buddy Squirrely Greg, he's a document specialist.
Why is he called Squirrely Greg?
Because he works in a library squirreling away documents.
That makes sense.
He also stores food in his cheeks.
That's how we get all that free popcorn into the movie theaters.
No. Oh, no, no. We are not doing the A -L -A -M -O. That play is cursed.
Nine years ago, the whole Mexican army got a foot fungus from Damp Boot.
The auditorium smelled like corn chips and death.
I don't want to do the old Alamo play. I want to do rock Alamo. A hip -hop
musical like Hamilton.
You want tickets to Hamilton?
No.
What if you could be the one to bring something like that here?
The Hamilton of Travis Prep.
Huh. You could be the greatest thing any human can aspire to be.
A producer.
A producer.
Rosalie Mullins presents... Work my name into a song and you've got a deal.
Into a musical about the Alamo?
Uh -huh.
Deal.
Oh, what about... Nothing dullin' about Rosalie Mullins?
I got tills.
Here it is. What do you think?
Huh? What? Huh? Oh, no, that's not happening anymore.
You like Summer?
That's big news.
But you can't tell anybody about this, Mr. Finn.
Of course not.
And delete.
I was supposed to be Romeo, but now we're doing Rock Alamo and there's no
kissing scene with Summer.
Just get into the new play.
Even if Summer's playing Davy Crockett, you'll still get to spend time with her.
Maybe you'll even get a chance to tell her how you feel.
I don't know.
It's not so romantic when the girl you like has a dead raccoon on her head.
Been there.
Got past it.
Maybe I should try out.
I could be that nice guy, Jim Bowie. No, no, no.
Bowie spent the whole battle in bed with a fever.
You should be Colonel Travis.
He and Crocker were tight.
Okay, then.
I'll go try for Travis.
Thanks, Mr. Finn.
This guy.
Davy Crockett volunteering for service?
Ms. Director?
Uh, no, we have a Davy Crockett. But you know who you might be good at?
General Santa Anna.
Santa Anna is the bad guy. How dare you cast me as the villain? I will make you
rue the day you crossed me.
Actually, he was a great general. And his men loved him. He's kind of a tragic
figure. Sir, this really is a great part.
I am the Generalissimo. I'm just looking for peace, you know. I understand you
want more land, but I can't let you increase it. So as Santa Anna, the top
banana, I'm going to ask you to cease and go.
Welcome aboard, Generalissimo.
What? What about me?
You can be Sergeant Gutierrez, Santa Anna's boot polisher.
Thank you.
Get my things.
Wait, you're my flunky!
I want to be Jim Bowie!
I looked it up on the internet. He invented the Bowie knife. He was a
That's me. No, wait, I want to be the... You want to be the knife guy?
Well, I guess that means I'll have to be Travis.
Darn it.
All right, then.
Bowie was the coolest guy at the Alamo.
Hey, wait, what's this?
Your lines.
Cough, cough.
Perfect, you're a natural.
Yeah, Bowie was the coolest guy at the Alamo. Who was too sick to get out of
bed.
Internet!
Hola, brochachos.
Squirrely Greg translated the letter.
Is it a declaration of war? Battle plan? No.
Better.
It's Santa Anna's secret.
Wait for it.
Family recipe for guacamole.
How is that better? I hate you right now.
Guys, most people only get to read about history. You get to dip a chip into it,
chew it up, swallow it, digest it. Okay, okay, okay.
So we've been bringing history of life through food? I guess that's cool. We
sell this at the musical.
Ladies love the guac.
One possible snag.
Squirrely Greg couldn't figure out one ingredient.
All he knew is that it started with the letter C.
We have to find that ingredient.
Let's get every food that starts with C and meet back here at 430. Cool?
For history!
For glory!
430!
Guacamole!
Okay, this next scene is where Travis asks the volunteers to step over the
and stay to fight.
Freddy, you're here. Summer, there.
And Asher, you're over there in that bed suffering in the corner.
And I really want to believe you're choking on your own phlegm.
And Freddy.
Put Wilford over the line at this time. Yes, sir!
Overcome your fear of dying at this time. Yes, sir!
We're badly out, man.
It's not what we planned.
Each of your lights will shine for all time. Yes, sir!
Summer! I got a mess of Tennesseans, feeling full of beans.
Couldn't do better with the U .S. Marines. The danger's near, but we're
without Pierre to volunteer.
And I'm here too, but I had a fever so hard.
Why is Jim Bowie singing?
I thought that maybe Crockett and Bowie could have some time together.
No, you have a fever. You just lie there and wait for death.
Listen up! We are not freestyling here. We do these words and only these words.
My grandparents are flying in and I thought... Shh!
You're too weak to speak.
Sergeant Gutierrez, it's about your line.
You want to expand it? I'm cutting it.
Only lying will she. Forget Santa Anna.
I'll be the real villain. She thinks she's so smart with her rhyme.
Let's see if she can rhyme sabotage.
Camouflage, entourage.
Shut up, Julian.
What do you think, Mr. Finn?
Okay,
so charcoal?
No.
There's only one left.
Cayenne pepper.
Ooh, I love a little. Kick.
Mm -hmm.
Mm, that's good.
That's the one.
We found it.
Mm. Mm, wow.
You guys didn't skimp on the spice, huh?
It's, uh, sort of building. Like, uh... Lovely.
I'm on fire!
I'm on fire!
Water! I need water!
But,
Mr. Finn, that's turtle water. I don't care!
Oh, the spice pack.
Just the hair.
Super old guacamole here.
Tastes the bloodiest battle in Texas history.
Hello.
Producer and fabulous new dress coming through.
Who am I wearing?
It's a designer by the name of Gucky.
And yes, I am pronouncing that correctly.
Are you taking some guacamole back to the cast?
Um, yeah.
That makes sense.
I'm doing that.
What you said.
That's all.
Bye now.
It looks like the end of our fight.
Time to go towards the bright light. Cop, cop!
We did our best, baby.
And if we're lucky, maybe this date will go on and a new checklist will be born.
Oh, now you understand.
The master plan.
Courage, that's the key.
If you're ever gonna be what you wanna be.
Courage! Courage!
We both knew we'd die in this place, but dying is easy when it's being yours.
Being with you has been the most amazing time of my life.
Is he freestyling?
I told you it was cursed.
What are you doing?
There's something I need to say.
Something that's deep in my heart and has to come out.
gonna forget this you know what you're right mission accomplished
oh it's on
What? Yeah, you are such a great actor. I mean, I really felt the connection
between Crockett and Colonel Travis.
Yeah, those two guys are really great together.
This is so much better than Hamilton.
That was close.
Almost got on my fancy t -shirt.
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