Original subtitles

[Green Day�s "Welcome To Paradise"]

I�m not impressed.

I am so impressed.

What do you think of Freddy?

Eh, decent kickflip, wicked railslide,

but I�d have to see him on the half-pipe

before judging him.

Can�t you just say he�s cute like a normal person?

He�s cute. Are you happy?

- ? I want to take you through a wasteland ?

[students screaming]

- Watch it, Zack. - Whoa, Freddy!

Yeah, 28 seconds. New record.

I built this rocket in record time too--

eight months.

It�s not a fast sport.

Lawrence, you better hide that.

You know rockets are against the rules.

Freddy should get in more trouble than me.

He just skateboarded down the hallways

like he was in a body spray commercial.

Hello, Mrs. Calpakis. You look lovely today.

Oh, why, thank you.

It�s just a little something I put toge--

Nice try.

This is going in the Confiscation Closet.

Someone could get hurt.

Can�t you just be chill about this?

Oh, I�m more chill than you think.

In fact, I used to roller boogie.

Oh. Oh.

Ow.

She is not good at roller boogie.

? Stop tellin� me to read between the lines ?

? It all adds up to one thing ?

Five, four, three, two, one.

? If you think you�re gonna lose your cool ?

? Well, sometimes you gotta break the rules ?

? Hey, show me what you know, give it up to rock �n� roll ?

? �Cause we ain�t gonna stop ?

? If you�re feeling like you�re gettin� schooled ?

? There�s an answer right in front of you ?

? Hey, show me what you know, give it up to rock �n� roll ?

? �Cause we ain�t gonna stop ?

- ? Hey! ? - ? Are you ready to rock? ?

Appreciate you being able to step in

on such late notice.

I do it all for the kids.

Will I be paid in advanced?

You will get a check at the end of the week.

Hello, children.

all: Hello, Principal Mullins.

Mrs. Calpakis broke her hip and will be out indefinitely.

This is your new substitute, Mr. Finn.

Please be courteous and respectful.

I will try.

I was speaking to the children.

Oh, FYI, the students in your class are gifted.

[chuckles] We�ll see about that.

What�s three times four?

all: 12.

I guess you�re right.

Let�s rock and roll, young learners.

Okay, roll call. Dig it.

I�m gonna give you all awesome nicknames.

Um, Hot Rod.

Clapton, Gooch, Headband.

But my name is Summer.

Dude, you can�t give yourself a nickname.

You�ll be Summer.

This is gonna be really confusing.

T-Bone, Doctor Roboto,

Axl Rose If He Was a Girl.

Uh, Zack.

That�s my actual name.

Your parents nailed it!

Who did that?

Because that was awesome!

So you�re not going to put it in the Confiscation Closet?

New teacher, new rules.

I say let�s make this whole learning thing fun!

I don�t just want to teach you guys.

I want to inspire--Aah!

All I�m saying

is that we can do this the boring way...

or the Mr. Finn way.

[high-pitched voice] I say we do it the Mr. Finn way.

- I�m in. - Me too.

Freddy and I are in.

If Headband�s in, I�m in.

[normal voice] Great!

�Cause I snuck a box of doughnuts

from the teachers� lounge.

all: Oh!

Guys, we just won the substitute-teacher lottery.

Oh, yeah!

[rock music]

? ?

That was the best two minutes of my entire life!

Uh-huh.

I�m crashing.

Best sub ever.

There�s got to be a catch. - Yeah.

All right, it says here

y�all are discussing sonnets by William Shakespeare.

Yeah. We�re stuck on a sonnet

that just does not make any sense.

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Well, you can always tell

everything you need to know about a poem from its title.

So this is called "Sonnet 137."

That�s deep.

"Thy blind fool, Love,

what dost thou to mine eyes?"

Um, maybe it�ll make more sense in a British accent.

[British accent] "Thy blind fool, Love,

what dost thou to mine eyes?"

Nope.

I knew there was a catch. This teacher can�t teach.

[school bell rings]

Wow. That was fast. Uh, great day, guys.

We�ll get to the bottom of this tomorrow.

Um, it�s only 10:00. We�re just going to music class.

Right.

[classical music playing]

? ?

I think I just found a way to teach these guys.

[rock music]

? ?

[school bell rings]

Whoa!

I heard you all in music class.

You guys are good!

And I realized there�s a better way

to learn Shakespeare--by adding a little rock and roll.

[plays chord]

Zack? - Huh?

Ever play electric guitar?

No, my father makes me play classical.

He says, "Music should be boring."

Hmm. Wrong!

Hit me with some Beethoven.

[plays "Fuer Elise"]

[plays distorted chord]

That was awesome!

Tomika, that cello you were playing

has four strings, right?

- Uh-huh. - So does this bass.

[playing rock bass]

Whoa.

? ?

Oh. Welcome to funky town.

Population--you, lady.

Oh, yeah. I�m bringing the funk.

Lawrence.

How long you played the piano?

Since I was 11 months old.

Okay, your parents are pushing you a little too hard,

but that�s a problem for another day.

Right now you�re on keys.

And mess up your hair. You look like a LEGO guy.

Now you look like a rock star.

[plays rock keyboard]

All right, we need a drummer.

Freddy, think you can handle it?

I don�t know, Mr. Finn.

[plays rock drums]

? ?

Yeah, I got it.

Summer, can you read the poem?

You know �em! [chuckles]

Just give me the book. - Okay.

I reread that sonnet and realized what it really is.

It�s an angry breakup song.

Oh, so like a Taylor Swift song.

Okay, sure.

Sonnets have a rhyme scheme, so let�s put it to music.

Follow my lead.

[playing rhythmic rock]

"Thy blind fool, Love, what dost thou to mine eyes?"

In rock, that means...

? Love isn�t kind, it makes you blind ?

"That they behold, and see not what they see?"

? I thought you were hot, now I know you�re not ?

Smoke machine!

Lights!

Tasty lead!

[playing rock guitar solo]

Skip down to the last bit!

"In things right true my heart and eyes have erred,

and to this false plague am I now transferred."

I got this.

? I�m crushing on a girl and it�s a major bummer ?

That�s it! But mine rhymed.

Keys! Drum fill!

Bring us home, Tomika!

? ?

Yeah!

All right.

Huh. Shakespeare brought the funk.

Where�d you learn to teach like that?

Uh, I�m in a special program.

I�m, uh, getting my masters in Teachology

at the Van Halen Institute.

I go every day after school.

[school bell rings]

Oh, man. Guys, great day.

It�s just lunchtime.

Seriously? I really need to get a watch.

Mr. Finn is fun,

but there is no way he�s a real teacher.

He asked to borrow lunch money.

Okay, maybe he doesn�t follow rules,

steals doughnuts, and calls us "dudes,"

but that doesn�t mean-- Yeah, he�s not a real teacher.

If he�s not for real, we might not graduate.

I don�t think I can survive on the streets.

Guys, he�s the best teacher we�ve ever had.

Just because he�s fun doesn�t mean he�s not legit.

I�ll prove it.

[upbeat music]

You guys were supposed to come with me.

all: Oh.

? ?

So far, we�ve followed Mr. Finn to a taco truck,

laser tag, and now here.

[rock music playing]

? ?

That�s our teacher?

Dewey Finn? Teacher?

He�s not qualified to teach dog to bark,

but he is a rock god!

Whoo!

Rock and roll!

? ?

Oh. Hey, guys.

Definitely not a teacher.

[rock music]

Morning, class.

Oh, I get it-- the silent treatment.

We�re mad at you!

What? I�m not good at the silent treatment.

And, Zack, I�m still mad at you for drinking my smoothie

in the third grade.

I�m getting it all out, people!

I�m sorry I lied to you.

You�re not even a real teacher.

You�re right. Until two days ago,

I worked at my uncle�s yogurt cart on Sixth Street

during the day and tried to be a rock star at night--

playing gigs, staying up late,

thousands of people screaming my name.

Well, like, 30, but still...

- That sounds awesome. - Yeah.

My whole world was trying to win Battle of the Bands.

What�s Battle of the Bands?

It�s this epic contest

with all the best bands in Austin.

If your band wins, you become legendary.

But I gave all that up.

Last night was my last gig.

Why?

Because I�m at that stage in my life

where I want something real.

Something real, like fake teaching?

Look, my mom�s a substitute teacher,

and she loves it,

so I fibbed about my qualifications to get this job,

and you know what?

I love it too.

Being your teacher is way cooler than playing any club,

and that�s the truth.

[high-pitched voice] I say we forgive him.

Look, we like you too, but we have to learn stuff.

Yeah, I�m sorry, Mr. Finn, but we need a real teacher.

all: Yeah.

I don�t know, guys.

The skull makes a strong argument.

The skull�s an idiot.

My dad wants me to get into Yale.

[normal voice] Are you gonna turn me in?

We don�t know, but right now we have to go.

Principal Mullins makes us play a recital in the quad

once a month.

You know, what you did was not cool.

Don�t look at me like that.

[classical music playing]

? ?

I wish we could rock out like we did with Mr. Finn.

Principal Mullins would kill us.

Then my dad would kill me.

I�d be dead twice.

Principal Mullins, we have a situation.

There�s a 483 in progress.

An atomic wedgie?

Let�s roll.

Principal Mullins is gone.

We can do this the boring way or the Mr. Finn way.

Summer, do you know "What I Like About You"?

Is it my smile, my eyes, the way I make you feel?

I meant the song "What I Like About You."

Oh. Yeah, me too.

Are those not the lyrics? [chuckles]

Let�s do this.

One, two, three, four!

[The Romantics� "What I Like About You" playing]

? ?

all: ? Hey! ?

? Uh-huh-huh ?

? That�s what I like about you ?

? You hold me tight ?

? Tell me I�m the only one ?

? Want to come over tonight? ?

? Yeah! ?

? Keep on whispering in my ear ?

? Tell me all the things that I want to hear ?

? �Cause it�s true ?

? That�s what I like about you ?

? That�s what I like about you ?

all: ? What I like about you ?

? That�s what I like about you ?

all: ? That�s what I like about you ?

? That�s what I like about you ?

all: ? Hey! ?

[cheers and applause]

Good night, Austin!

- We should start a band. - Yeah.

That would be so cool.

Maybe we could even be good enough

to enter the Battle of the Bands.

[scoffs] Enter?

We�ll win. - [chuckles]

Does anyone here know anything about being in a rock band?

Yes. Oh, rock band?

No.

Mr. Finn can help us.

He knows all about rock and roll.

Yeah, but there�s no way Principal Mullins

will let us play rock music in class.

Then we�ll keep it a secret.

Mr. Finn can help us with that too.

I�m so excited, I could hug you...

all.

I could hug you all. [chuckles]

Bring it in, sister.

Mr. Finn, we changed our mind.

Mr. Finn?

He�s gone.

Look, he left his laptop.

Hey, guys.

You guys were right. You need a real teacher.

So I�m on my way back to my old job.

Just so you know, even though it was only a day,

being your teacher was one of the greatest honors

of my life.

So I guess this is good-bye forever.

Oh, and check out the box.

[gasps]

Mr. Finn got all of our stuff back

from the Confiscation Closet.

- My skateboard! - Yeah!

My dodgeball.

Why�d that get taken away?

Now I get it.

Mr. Finn left because of us.

We have to get him back if we want to be a band.

- Totally. - Absolutely.

We better move fast.

If Principal Mullins sees he�s gone,

he�ll be fired.

Then let�s get to that yogurt stand.

- Yeah. - How?

We have to get past the hall monitor,

and that kid is ruthless.

Don�t worry, guys. I got this.

[adventurous music]

Hall pass!

You got lucky... this time.

Move along.

? ?

That�s amazing, Lawrence.

Ow!

No skateboards allowed!

Whose is this?

- Hey, Clark...

can�t catch me.

He�s gaining on you.

Time to launch the rocket.

Wait. Is my skateboard gonna be okay?

Did I mention there�s a rocket strapped to it?

So, no.

It�s for Mr. Finn. Do it.

That�ll keep him busy. Let�s go.

Someone chained our bikes together.

I did. It�s a titanium chain

with a combination code that�s virtually impossible to crack.

You�re welcome.

Great. What�s the combination? We�re kind of in a hurry.

Um, funny thing... [chuckles nervously]

I forgot.

What?

Ugh.

[metal scraping]

Well, here we are.

I just remembered the combination!

Well, no harm done.

There�s Mr. Finn.

Two sugar cones?

? Yo, yo, yo, my name is Yogurt Boy ?

? Dishing out the yizzle for you to enjoy ?

Hey, guys.

Wait. Why aren�t you in school?

We want you to come back, Mr. Finn.

all: Yeah.

I can�t go back. I have my dignity.

Besides, you guys are right. You need a real teacher.

You are a real teacher, Mr. Finn.

all: Yeah.

I mean, you taught us the meaning of Shakespeare.

You inspired us to rock out in the quad,

and you made learning fun.

Actual fun.

Do you know the last time we had fun at that school?

Kindergarten, December 12th,

finger painting.

It really doesn�t happen much.

Yeah.

Come on, Mr. Finn.

We want to win Battle of the Bands,

and we can�t do it without you.

- Come on, Mr. Finn. - Please? Please?

You want to be a teacher. We want to be a rock band.

- Yeah. - We�ll make you a deal.

We�ll keep your secret if you keep ours.

both: Come on, Mr. Finn. - Come back with us.

You got a deal!

[all cheering]

Come on, pedal harder!

We�ve got to get back to school before we get caught!

[grunts] Shouldn�t this be the other way around?

Nah, this feels right.

[groans]

- ? Oh, so what? I messed it up ?

? I said too much I pushed my luck ?

? So what? I screamed too loud ?

? I fooled around, did I let you down? ?

? Hollywood Boulevard, sunrise over stars ?

? Heels over my shoulder ?

? Ain�t no shame ?

? Watch me do my walk of fame ?

? Gonna do my walk, gonna do my walk of fame ?

You can�t unsee that.

[upbeat rock music]

? ?

And that explains space... and time.

I think I can speak for all of us when I say

learning from Mr. Finn has been quite an adventure.

Well, I see you have things under control.

Keep up the good work.

[door closes]

She�s gone.

All right, then, Battle of the Bands

is coming up, and we got a lot of work to do.

Let�s rock!

[feedback whines]

[The Romantics� "What I Like About You" playing]

all: ? Hey! ?

? Uh-huh-huh ?

? What I like about you ?

both: ? You hold me tight ?

? ?

all: ? Tell me I�m the only one ?

? Want to come over tonight? ?

? Yeah! ?

? Keep on whispering in my ear ?

? Tell me all the things that I want to hear ?

? �Cause it�s true ?

? That�s what I like about you ?

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