Original subtitles

Hey, Mona, do me a favor. Come here.

Take a picture of me and Al and my diploma, huh?

10 ,000 years of evolution in one picture.

Gee, I wish Darwin could see this.

Hey, Tony, we're all real proud of you. How about a few words?

Oh, sure, sure.

Hey, everybody, I'm really glad you all came.

You know, this is the proudest day of my life.

You know, it took me a long time to get here.

20 years longer than most people.

But I did it. I graduated and now I'm a teacher.

Speech! Speech!

What do you think I've been doing here, Al?

I know you should teach speech.

He talks so good.

Don't you know anything?

It's he speaks so good.

Actually, Ernie, it's he speaks so well.

That was worth embarrassing me for?

Oh, hey, look who's here. The valedictorian.

First ever from the theater department. And let me tell you something. I want

you to know that was one unusual commencement speech.

Hey, I couldn't have done it without you.

And don't forget it.

The scary part is, he graduated before me.

I am so proud of you guys.

The two most important men in my life. My father and my husband.

My future and my past.

The man who brought me up and the man who will bring me to my grave.

Sam, later on, don't make any toasts.

Hello? Excuse me?

Allow me.

Python!

Thank you.

Tony,

I've been looking for a way to express what I'm feeling about this very

important moment in your life, and I finally found it.

This is for you.

This better be symbolic there, Angela.

Oh, it is. It is.

It represents your years as a housekeeper.

And now if you move into this very important phase in your life, I want you

break it over your knee to mark your new beginning.

Oh, that's great.

That's pretty good there, Angela. Well, hey, here it goes. Goodbye,

housekeeping.

And hello, teaching.

And lesson number one, don't ever...

I never went to college like you or my son.

Hey, I'm not complaining. I did pretty good last year. I made like $157 ,000.

But I always felt like something was missing, something important.

So I got to hand it to you. To do something like this at your age, I got a

of respect.

$157 ,000?

And he still won't buy me new carpeting.

Tony's going to be doing something he loves, and you can't put a price on

That's right. I'm going to be out there helping kids develop character, to learn

and to grow.

That's terrific, Tony.

Where are you going to be teaching?

Well, I actually don't have a job yet, but I have a lot of applications out.

And, you know, I just graduated, so it's early. It's early.

Not that early, Tony.

I got my job in Norwalk High six weeks ago. Yeah, I got mine last month.

Oh, no, really, huh? Sure, Tony. It is a tough market out there. There's not

many jobs. And what is out there?

Goes like that.

Well, gee, I wish I'd, you know, done some job hunting a little earlier.

Don't worry.

You'll be fine.

Oh, yeah.

You're not going to be anything like Julia Catalano. Who?

The girl from my neighborhood.

A teacher.

She's been looking for work for 36 months.

That's nothing. My cousin Freddy's a teacher, too. He's been out of work for

five years, and he's got a master's.

Five years and he's got a master's.

Anybody

got

any glue?

There's a time for love and a time for living. Take a chance and face the wind.

Open road and a road that's hidden. Brand new life around the bend.

It ain't so long but you might awake to a brand new life. Brand new life. Brand

new life around the bend.

Key punch operator, word processor. There's nothing here for Tony. Wait a

minute. Wait a minute. Here's something.

Teacher wanted.

That's great. What does it say?

Needed immediately.

Fairfield area. Must be athletic.

Strict disciplinarian with the knowledge of knots.

Mother, that's the personal.

Best offer he's had in weeks.

Hi. Hi, Tony. Hi, hi, hi.

Now look who's back, Willie Loman.

Lay off, Mona. I just want her to be liked.

There's no jobs out there. Nothing, nothing.

Well, that depends.

Can you tie a sheep shank?

Mother, please.

Fine.

I have better things to do myself.

I just wish I had anything to do.

Hey, Dad.

Any luck today?

Well, I didn't get it by a car, but of course there's always tomorrow.

Tony, don't be discouraged. You're not alone.

A lot of very good people don't have jobs.

Hey, guys. I'm home from work with my first paycheck.

Ah, what a feeling.

Having a job is like being on top of the world. It makes a man feel like a man.

It's a reason to get up in the morning and live, knowing that I'm a vital,

productive worker, a contributing member to society, not some leech. It may not

be much, but at least I'm not a bum.

Dad still hasn't found a job yet.

I hate that hellhole.

I'm happy for you now.

I'll give you a paycheck to your wife.

Oh,

what a feeling.

Oh, hey, guys. Look, Tony, you got a couple letters from schools. Open them

Probably rejections with postage due. Don't be so negative.

Yeah, all right. See what we got here.

Sorry, Mr. Maselli. Why am I not surprised?

I'll stay here.

We regret to inform you, Mr. Maselli. Hey, I'm on a roll here. Look at this.

We'd like to set up an appointment, Mr. and Mrs. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

That's good, right? Who's it from, Dad? It's from Stone Creek Community College.

That's only a few miles from here. What's the job? It doesn't say. It just

that they're considering me for a teaching position.

Well, this is perfect. I'll take it. Well, Tony, you don't know what the job

yet. Well, and I don't care.

Look out for the truck!

Look out for the truck!

Don't yell at me!

I'm scared!

Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell.

The most important thing about driving is to always look out!

No way, man. The other truck was much closer. I think the closest is when we

lock bumpers with the police car.

Kelly, do me a favor. Just get off at the next off -ramp, please. I can't. I'm

scared of off -ramps.

Oh, great, great. Well, guys, looks like we're headed for California.

Kelly,

please. Now, the off -ramps are your friends.

I have no friends.

I might as well die right now.

No, no, no, Kelly, Kelly, don't think like that now, Kelly. Don't think like

that. Now, listen, you've got plenty of friends.

Jeff and Todd, they're your friends, right, guys?

Kelly, we're your friends.

You're home. I didn't hear your car pull up. I walked home.

You walk, Tony, it's ten miles.

I'm never getting in a car again.

It's not bad.

I was stuck in a death trap, doing 90 miles an hour with the cast of Wayne's

World.

You poor thing. Well, I hope you quit.

I can't quit, Angela.

I mean, I may not be perfect, but at least it's my foot in the door. And

it's the best offer I've gotten.

Not necessarily.

Maybe it's good news.

Is it addressed to me? Uh -huh. Then it ain't good news.

You read it. I can't take another rejection.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

How about a job offer?

Give me that.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. This ain't just a job offer, Angela.

It's a history teacher and baseball coach, Angela.

And they want me for an interview in Iowa on Friday. Oh, this is great. This

is... Iowa?

Iowa?

Yeah, Iowa. I mean, it's Wells Junior College, Brantford, Iowa.

I mean, there must be some mistake, huh? I wonder how they got your name. I

don't know. I don't know.

Hey, maybe they got it off a mailing list when I ordered that rake and hoe

No, no, no. It says here, it says here, my counselor recommended me, and they

were impressed with my unique background and academic achievements.

That's great.

Yeah, that's... Iowa.

Yeah.

I mean, that's far.

That's far.

That's out there all right.

Too bad.

Job sounds great.

Well, hey, at least I still got my job as a crab dummy.

Oh, you're still up.

Yeah, I couldn't sleep, so I thought I'd come down and read a little.

Oh, well, I'm still hungry.

Do we have any more of that lasagna left? Oh, sure. Oh, you like it cold,

Okay, I'll get some more.

You're reading the encyclopedia, volume I?

Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, see, I was, you know, I said I couldn't sleep, so I came

down here and I was reading about insomnia.

It's open to Iowa.

Yeah, well, that's what it said on the cures for insomnia. See, Iowa.

You're still thinking about this job? Well, you know, maybe a little. I mean,

sounds so great and would look a lot better on a resume than driving

you know.

Well...

Tony, maybe we should check it out.

Oh, what's the point, Angela? You know, it's 1 ,346 miles away. I mean, that's a

commute.

Tony, if this could be your dream job, I think you at least owe it to yourself

to see what it's like.

I don't know. I mean, really, what is the point? I mean, you know, we're

married, and my family's here, my friends, your business. Well, don't

about it. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. If we come to it, who

knows?

You could hate it. They could hate you.

Thank you.

The point is, you'll never know unless you go there.

And I don't want you to have any regrets.

You know, always wondering what if.

You know, I mean, maybe I should just go out there and see what they have to

offer. Sure, we'll make it a vacation. We'll take the whole family. It'll be

fun. Great.

Great. Okay. So, we'll go. So, we'll go. Okay.

Okay.

Night.

Night.

Iowa?

The campus is magnificent.

The whole town is.

I don't see how anybody couldn't love living here. It's like a picture

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Small and flat.

Tony, Angela, what do you think of our campus so far?

It's like a picture postcard.

It's lovely.

The whole town is lovely. You know, I always thought of Iowa as just cows and

corn and pigs and city slickers sticking their foot in their mouth.

What about you, Tony? You ready to sign on?

I don't know, Dr. Graham. You know, I've never been the kind of guy that marries

the first girl he dances with.

Tell me about it.

Please. Well, normally neither are we, but we don't often get former pro

ballplayers with a strong academic record like yours. Did I mention that

year we were the number one junior college in Iowa academically?

That's interesting.

And athletically, we were number one in the Midwest.

Oh, that's interesting.

In fact, here are a few of our first place trophies. There's wrestling and

track, football, and of course, baseball.

You keep your trophies in the history department?

Oh, we had to. We ran out of room in the Hall of Champions.

That's interesting.

Please, come in.

Oh, this is quite an office you got here, Dr. Graham. Oh, actually, this

be yours.

Really? This would be mine?

Oh, well, it's not bad. I mean, if you like burled walnut.

And take a look at this view.

Wow.

You like our stadium. Well, finally, we've impressed you with something.

Yeah, I mean, you know, what?

What, no dome?

They left it open.

Oh, you city boys will fall for anything.

Oh, you know, there was one other thing I wanted to show you. I'll be right

back.

Boy, do they want you.

Sure they want me. They probably can't find anybody else to fill this crummy

job. Crummy job? Tony, come on. This is terrific.

This is... More terrific than I was counting on. What are you talking about,

Angie? Do you know there's not one gelato stand in this whole state? Who

be happy?

This place is heaven. They even have an Olympic swimming pool.

Guess who is the new sweetheart of Sigma Chi?

All right, all right, I admit, I admit, it's a nice place, a nice place. Well, I

found what I was looking for.

There.

Shall I put it on the door?

Associate professor?

Wow, I thought they'd start you as a regular teacher.

Oh, we thought we'd sweeten the pot a little bit.

What do you say, Tony?

Well, uh, I'm sorry, Dr. Graham.

Well, so are we. We thought you were our man.

But, uh, good luck.

Oh, thank you. And believe me, you made the decision very difficult.

It was a fun trip anyway. I got pinned, serenaded, and I saw a two -headed

heifer.

Come on, gang, let's go.

Come on, come on.

Tony? Yeah?

Are you sure this is what you want to do?

Yeah, I'm sure.

I mean, really, I don't want you to have any regrets.

Angela, I'd regret it a lot more if I took this job and it messed up what we

have.

I'm sure.

Come on.

This is the final boarding call for flight 485. That's us, that's us. We're

late. All right, okay, okay, you know. Hulu Dubuque would have a rush hour.

Step back, please.

Oh, yeah, sure.

Must be my keys. Here we go.

Step back again, please. Uh, yeah, sure, sure.

Okay, you made your point.

Tony, what's the problem? I don't know. Maybe I got too much iron in my blood

there.

Oh, come on. This is ridiculous.

We're on our way to New York.

We may not be the big city, sir, but we do the best we can.

What are you doing? Wait a minute. I got something here.

Feels like a knife.

No, it's not a knife. It's not a knife.

He's right.

It's a nameplate.

Wow, you're an associate professor?

No, actually, I turned it down.

You're kidding.

Why would you do a stupid thing like that?

I don't have that plate.

Keep the change.

Come on.

So what was it, the metal plate in your head?

You're going to go. You're going to go.

Tony,

wait. We have to talk.

Well, we'll talk on a plate, Angela. No, Tony, this is important. I've been

thinking about it all day.

And the fact that you kept the nameplate tells me I'm making the right decision.

On what decision?

Please, we're going to have to close the door. Just one moment, please.

Tony, I want you to call Dr.

Graham and tell him you'll take the job.

Why? Why? Because I kept a silly souvenir?

No. Because it's the right thing to do and we both know it.

Last call for flight 485.

I know you're worried about us being separated, but you don't have to. We can

make it work. What about the family, huh? Hey, you guys need me, right?

No. Not me.

I don't.

Like that heifer needed two heads.

There's a lot of love in this terminal.

No, Dad, what we're trying to say is we'll miss you, but we'll be okay.

And, hey, I'm married now.

And I'm going away to college next year.

Besides, you're 40 years old. It's time for you to leave home.

Would you all kindly board the plane? Dad, what we're trying to say is if you

want that job, take it.

Oh, gee.

Angela, I don't know what to do. Here's an idea.

Get on the plane.

Just a moment, please. Tony, call him before he gives the job to someone else.

If you don't get on this plane right now... Know what?

You just take your little stuff and put it right over there and zip it.

Forgive her. Forgive her. She just found out the in -flight movie was Return to

the Blue Lagoon.

Angela, Angela, what about us? We're getting married. What about the wedding?

We'll still have it.

Many people have long -distance relationships.

And besides, Tony, it's only temporary. See, with this on your resume, you can

get a job anywhere.

I can't. I have responsibilities.

Listen to me.

From the day you walked into my house, you've been sacrificing for other

I mean, you came there in the first place to build a better life for Sam.

And when I wanted to build my business, you were there for me.

For all these years, you've been putting your life on hold for other people, for

other people's dreams, and now it's your turn.

Please.

Tony, let me do something for you.

Associate professor sounds pretty good, huh?

Sounds great.

Okay, I'm going to call Dr. Graham. I'm going to take it. I'll take the job.

Okay, okay.

Wait a minute.

Is there a phone on the plane, miss? Yes, sir. Oh, great. Then I'll call from

the air. No, sir.

Why not?

It left.

something. Because I hate you.

So much for the friendly skies.

First you leave Brooklyn, then the entire eastern seaboard. Oh, it's all

Mrs. Rossini. I'm just going out there to teach for a year. Well, you still

these. Gallon of olive oil.

And this.

What's this?

Name of the other Italian in Iowa.

We're speaking together, and I'm buried in tapes and books.

Stop it.

I will not have you feeling guilty for ignoring and neglecting me.

When he walks through that door, he's all mine.

Tony! Don't kiss me. I'm going to vomit.

Last weekend was supposed to be our weekend, but when you got me sick, we

change our schedule, and so I fell behind.

Hello? Could somebody please pick up this phone?

Oh, this is going to be fun.