All language subtitles for whos_the_boss_s04e10_car_and_driver

There's a time for love and a time for
living. Take a chance and face the

An open road and a road that's hidden. A
brand new life around the bend.

There were times I lost a dream or two.

And found a trail.

And at the end was you.

There's a path you take and a path not
taken.

Choice is up to you, my friend.

Nights are long, but you're not awake to
a brand new life.

Brand new life. A brand new life for
Grumpy.

Tony,

your lasagna's wonderful.

Oh, thanks, woman.

Yes.

I meant mmm.

It was delicious.

Oh, thanks, Angela.

Maybe a little bland.

By the way, Angela, for your
information, most of the people in the

Seniors project are on a low -salt diet.

You're right.

Of course, it was a little runny, but it
is difficult to prepare food in such

large quantities.

Oh, no, no, not really. I cook for you
every night.

Well, see ya.

What do you mean, see ya? You gotta help
us clean up, right?

Tony, I have done my bit for the
seniors. I jog by the retirement home

morning in my tank top.

Something to look forward to in my old
days.

There he is again.

I'm going to kill that kid.

You know, somebody could really get
hurt. Wait for me. I want a piece of

maniac. Hey, you, get off that pedal a
little bit. There's kids in this

neighborhood and pets and the elderly.

And sometimes I park my jag in the
street.

Did you see that kid doing Mach 2 in a
25 -mile zone?

Well, did you get his license number?

You bet I did, huh? Wait, wait, wait.

KL5 -6218.

That's our phone number.

Okay, only three more lasagna drop -offs
and we've done our good deed for the

day. I just love talking to older
people. They're so wise and have such a

of history.

Yeah, Mrs. Bay's been seeing it all.

You know, she actually remembers the
original cast of Saturday Night Live.

Coming through.

All right. Pedal to the metal. Burn
rubber. Eat my death.

Sam, if you're through playing driver,
we have three deliveries left.

Lasagna's getting cold.

Oh, come on. Let me drive. The next
delivery's only a couple of blocks away.

Sam, your father trusted me with his
van. I'm with you.

Scoot over.

Scoot over. It's no fun.

Driving is a responsibility.

It's not supposed to be fun.

Are you strict?

I can't believe it. I can't believe it.

Jesse, it wasn't your fault.

Yes, it was.

No, it wasn't. It was mine. I was the
one who was driving.

I'm the one who let you drive.

But I'm the one who charmed you into it.

You didn't stand a chance.

What are we doing here? Crisis is
supposed to bring people together.

Then we're going to get closer and
closer.

Are you sure you don't have whiplash?

How could I have whiplash? The car
barely hit us. Anyway, you could hardly

notice the dent.

Hey, maybe my dad won't even see it.
Whoa, wait a minute. We have to tell

I know, I know.

Even though that'll mean that I'll be
grounded for life and you and I will be

through and I'll never see the inside of
Bloomingdale's again.

That's it. It's settled. We can't tell
him.

Look, I know it might be hard on us, but
if we lie, how are we going to live

with ourselves?

Live is the key word here.

Aren't you going to feel rotten lying to
your father?

Well, it wouldn't actually be a lie if
we were doing it for his own good.

You know, I read that the three most
stressful things a person could go

are the death of a loved one, divorce,
and having a daughter drive a van

a license.

Sam, you're really rationalizing here.

Yeah, and I could use a little help.

Samantha, we have to talk.

Tony, it was all my fault.

All right, well, then, Jesse, I'm really
disappointed in you.

I just ran into Mrs. O 'Reilly. She says
when the lasagna got to her house, it

was all cold and gummy.

Lasagna? Oh, I'm sorry, Dad. We really
blew it. We'll never let it happen

Ever. All right, what the heck, huh?

Mrs. O 'Reilly's kind of cold and gummy
herself.

I for one commend you. You guys gave up
a Saturday to feed those less fortunate

than us. And since we ran out of
congressional medals, we came up with a

way to show you our pride. Tony, tell
them what they want. All right, Angela.

The cute couple from Fairfield has won a
round trip. All expense paid, movie for

two at the Cineplex of their choice.

Jessie, do you still have the keys to my
van?

Yeah, right here, Tony. Well, hold on to
them, my boy.

Because for tonight's special occasion
only, you've earned the right to take my

angel. in the style to which he's
accustomed.

Hey, Tony, did you know your fender has
a new dent in it?

Give me the keys.

What do you mean I got a dent in my
fender? Dad, Dad, we were going to tell

but I didn't... Sam, allow me.

We were in a little accident, Tony.

An accident? Well, you guys are okay?

Oh, yeah, yeah, it was just a little
bump. We're both fine so far. Oh, good,

good. What happened?

Okay, well, it was totally not our
fault. We were at the corner of Maple

Grand at a stop sign, totally stopped,
seatbelt fastened, radio tuned to the

traffic report.

Sam, I really feel we should be honest
here.

Okay, we were listening to a heavy metal
station.

Anyway, we heard the screech and looked
back and saw this black Corvette

skidding towards us. Wait a minute.

A black Corvette with a raccoon tail on
his antenna?

That's the one.

Tony, we finally got some tangible
evidence to nail that little creep. Did

get his name? Yeah, Freddie Smith.

Freddie Smith.

Sounds like a born troublemaker.

Are you going to call his parents? No
way, no way. I'm going to take this kid

court, and I'm going to get his license
revoked.

Count me in. You're in. We'll build a
case that'll go down in the law books.

He'll rue the day he ever messed with
Michelle and Bauer. Angela, Angela,

skid marks, they're evident. They're
evidence. You get the camera, I'll get

tape measure.

Jesse, Samantha, you two are going to be
my key prosecution witnesses.

Everyone in this neighborhood is going
to know what happened here today.

In living color.

And you know what else is great, kids?

You two kids are going to get to see our
justice system in action.

All right, Freddie Smith.

I wonder if they let you do your nails
in prison.

There they are, the witnesses for the
prosecution.

Dad, you know... I've been thinking you
really don't need us here, do you?

Are you kidding?

You two are the most important witnesses
at this hearing. The driver, the

vehicle, and the passenger.

That's us, all right. Okay.

Now, look, Sam, Sam, you're turning
white, Sam. Take it easy. Don't be too

nervous. Now, look, I'm going to go up
there, and I'm going to soften him up,

and you two guys move in for the kill,
all right?

Yes, remember, tell the truth.

Yeah, the truth. Okay.

Jesse, will you stop sweating?

Courtroom is a very bad place to look
guilty.

Yeah, well, it's also a bad place to
lie.

Oh, look.

It's the Corvette kid.

What if he knows that I was the one who
was driving?

No way. He saw me get out on the
driver's side.

Besides, he was too busy fondling his
fender.

Hey, you two.

It was your fault, not mine.

Nobody comes to a complete stop at a
stop sign.

Don't talk to the enemy, Freddy.

All rise.

Fairfield Traffic Court, C -104, now in
session.

The Honorable Franklin Kreshek residing.
Be seated.

All right.

State of Connecticut versus... Good
morning, good morning.

What a lovely day for a hanging.

Madam, I will not tolerate this
disruption in my courtroom.

I'll keep your robe on, Your Honor.

I'm sorry I'm late. I had a hard time
finding a place to park. Oh, let me know

if the mayor needs his spot.

Are you finished, madam?

Yes, you may proceed.

Oh, thank you so much.

As I was saying, State of Connecticut
versus Freddie Smith, a minor.

Your Honor, the state is asking that Mr.
Smith's license be suspended for

reckless driving.

All right, let's wipe this garbage off
the street.

Objection, Your Honor. I demand that
slur be stricken from the record and the

witness be severely reprimanded.

What she said.

And now for the defense. I presume you
have something to say.

Yes, Your Honor. The defense will
attempt to prove that Mr. Smith is

good driver who's just the victim of
unsubstantiated charges and therefore

deserves to keep his license.

What a crock of hooey. Your Honor.

I got it.

If the prosecutor cannot control his
witness, I will throw the witness and

case out of court.

Oh, please, please, please, please,
please.

Will the prosecution please call its
first witness? Thank you, Your Honor.

state would like to call Anthony Morton
Maselli.

You never told me you had a middle name.

Well, now you know why.

You swear to tell the truth, the whole
truth, and nothing but the truth? You

your life. Truth is my middle name.

I thought it was Morton.

Mr. Metellic, would you tell us, please,
in your own words, exactly what

happened? And please be accurate.

No problem.

Right here.

Okay. It was the 12th of this month at 2
.41 p .m. I was in the kitchen making

chocolate fudge cake when I heard a
screech. I ran out and I saw a black

Corvette driven by one Freddie Smith
careening around the corner. Poor old

McCafferty was crossing the street with
a walker. I haven't seen her move that

fast since the pit bull moved in the
neighborhood.

Anyway, I yelled at him to stop, but he
had the nerve to...

Pick up Angela's pink blouse and... Oh,
that's the wrong page. Excuse me.

Before we get to Angela's skivvies,
could you get on with it, please? I'm

All right.

Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you, do we
want dangerous drivers like this in our

community? I say no.

We want a neighborhood where kids feel
free to run and jump, where the elderly

feel free to stroll, and where dogs feel
free to do dog things.

I am commending you on that moving and,
well, eloquent speech.

What can I say? I've got the gift for
gab.

Now, Mr. Maselli, you're, what, in your
30s? And, well, obviously a very healthy

individual. Well, I try to work out
regularly.

And it's paid off, if you don't mind my
saying so. Oh, no, I don't mind.

I would remind the defense attorney that
this is a court of law, not a singles

bar.

Your Honor, I assure you this line of
questioning is leading up to something.

That's what I'm afraid of.

Now, may I assume, Mr. Maselli, that
you, being a young and healthy man, have

fairly good eyesight?

Twenty -twenty. Perfect peepers.

And yet, even with those perfect
peepers, you never once managed to get

license number of the Corvette.

Well, it was moving too fast.

Well, then, can you in fact be sure it
was a Corvette?

No, it might have been an MX missile.

Well, can you in fact be sure it was the
same car every time?

Yes, I can, because there was a raccoon
tail on the antenna.

Oh, and is this it, Mr. Maselli?

Yes, that's it.

Wrong. I got this at the car wash this
morning. No further questions.

Wait a minute, Your Honor.

I know it was the same car. She twisted
the whole thing around.

Your Honor, I submit that Mr. Maselli's
testimony proves absolutely nothing.

You may step down, Mr. Maselli. But wait
a minute, Your Honor. What is this, a

kangaroo court?

Mr. Maselli, hop away.

Thank you, Your Honor. The state would
like to call the driver of the van,

Nash.

Go get him. It's up to you now. It's all
up to you.

It's up... You swear to tell the truth,
the whole truth, and nothing but the

truth? Uh, that's a toughie.

Well, a man has been searching for truth
for thousands of years.

Well, we'd like to find it before lunch.

Yes. Oh, good. Just like a regular
portrait.

Sit down.

Jesse, I, um...

I don't want to embarrass you, but
you're a straight -A student, isn't that

correct? Yeah. Oh, well, I did once get
a B -plus in algebra.

Thank you for your complete honesty.

Jesse, you were driving Mr.

Metelli's van at the time that it was
struck, correct?

Driving in what sense?

Driving, Mr. Nash, you know.

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.

Well... You know, I was in the van, and
I guess you could kind of say I was...

Stop, stop. I can't take it anymore.

Jesse, I can't let you do this.

I was driving the van.

Samantha,

what are you saying?

Stop, stop. I can't take it anymore,
Jesse.

Samantha, how could you do this?

Your Honor, do you have a witness
protection program?

No, but that little vein on his temple
is doing sit -up.

Dad, don't do this to me.

Please say something.

Anything. I don't want you to see Jesse
anymore.

Anything but that.

No, Sam, he's right.

Tony, you put a lot of trust in me and I
let you down.

I was immature and irresponsible and
dumb.

I'm really sorry.

Ah, Jesse.

That was really nice.

And I couldn't have said it better
myself.

Now get out.

Well, I guess this is it.

I'll miss you.

Goodbye, Sam.

Bye, Jesse.

See you at school tomorrow.

Dad, I'm sorry.

This is absolutely the worst thing I've
ever done. I know.

I mean, you lied, you broke the law, and
you could have gotten yourself hurt.

Nobody's perfect.

I hope you don't hate me.

I don't hate you, Samantha, but I'm very
disappointed in you. And I'm... I don't

know if I'm ever going to be able to
trust you again.

You just did what you had to do.

Yeah, justice, untempered with mercy,
has been served.

Hey, look, Jesse and Samantha got
everything they deserve.

Tony, what we're trying to say is don't
we all have a couple of skeletons in our

teenage closet?

What's yours, dear?

Leaving the cap off of your clearasil
tube?

Oh, mother, that's how much you know.

When I was 16, Jane Barth and I bought
fake ID cards and went to the Boom Boom

Room.

The Boom Boom Room?

Angela, that nightclub's the biggest
pickup joint in town.

I know.

Wait a minute. Used a fake ID to get
into a bar?

That's illegal.

I am a guest.

I am impressed.

What an adventure.

I had my first real drink, two
grasshoppers. I danced with a 24 -year

sailor. And on the way out, I threw up
on my pump.

Best night of my life.

We all do naughty things when we're
kids.

It's good practice for when you're
older.

You remember when you stole those street
signs?

Yeah, the street signs.

Yeah, but that's not half as bad as the
time I...

Oh, never mind. Come on. What, what,
what, what? No, no, no. It's too

embarrassing. Let's just forget it and
hope the police have.

And the Coast Guard.

The Coast Guard?

Well, just a couple of frogmen and a
minesweeper.

But hey, nobody got hurt.

Boy, was my old man mad.

I'll never forget it. It was on my
birthday, you know, and I was supposed

this beautiful red bike from Sears
Roebuck.

I loved that bike.

What happened?

Well, my father was all over me, and
then he chewed me inside out, and then

he gave me the bike.

Dad, I need to talk to you.

Come on, Angela.

Say, is the boom -boom room still open?

You know how you said that, uh...

You may never be able to trust me.

Well, Sam, you know, never.

Never's a long time.

Well, I was upstairs thinking and I came
to a decision.

I'm going to win your trust back.

You know, it could take a while.

I'm young.

I've got time.

Hey, Sam, let me ask you a question.

So how did you how'd you like driving
for the first time in your life?

It was great That's what I was afraid of

Ready

Smith was convicted of reckless driving
and his license was suspended for one

year He was forced to deliver suppers
for seniors on his skateboard

Jesse Nash had his license suspended for
30 days for allowing an unlicensed

driver to operate a vehicle. He was
given visitation rights to Samantha

one day a week, three hours, under
maximum security.

Samantha Maselli will not be permitted
to apply for her driver's license until

three months after her 16th birthday.

She was also grounded for six weeks and
banned from the year -end clearance sale

at Bloomingdale's.

was sentenced to two weeks without
chocolate fudge cake, making fun of her

housekeeper's middle name, Morton.

Bill Cosby has come up with a lot of
great titles for his various TV shows.

Bill Cosby Show, Cosby, Cause, etc.

But our favorite title is The Cosby Show
for two reasons. One, it's very...