All language subtitles for whos_the_boss_s03e21_walk_on_the_mild_side

There's a time for love and a time for
living. Take a chance and face the wind.

An open road and a road that's hidden. A
brand new life up down the bend.

There were times I lost a dream or two.

Found a trail and at the end was you.

There's a path you've taken, a path not
taken.

The choice is up to you, my friend.

Not so long, but you might awaken to a
brand new life.

Brand new life. A brand new life around
here.

Everyone, quick, come here! You won't
believe it!

Where's that? Where is it?

coming here.

Oh, gee. The place is such a mess.

Dad, they're giving a concert in
Westport next month. That's the big

Yes, that's big news, Angela.

In your terms, it would be like Victor
Moan coming to town.

Is it okay if I go? Sure. Thanks. One
more thing. Tickets go on sale at the

tomorrow morning, so I'm going to have
to get in line kind of early.

How early?

Now?

You're going to stand in line all night
for concert tickets? Forget about it,

Samantha. It's crazy.

That's right. It is crazy. I think you
should let her go. What?

Talk that talk, Mona.

All teenagers need to break loose once
in a while.

I didn't.

We're talking about normal teenagers,
dear.

Come on, Dad. There's no school
tomorrow.

There'll be plenty of security guards
and the falafel stand is open all night.

Well, I guess it'll be safe.

Is Macy's open? No.

Then I'll be safe, too.

All right. Look, you promised to stay in
a well -lit area.

Oh, thanks, Dad.

You're the best.

Oh, this is going to be so safe and well
-lit.

I guess I should be glad. I mean, hey,
it's pretty tame stuff compared to the

things I did as a kid.

Like what, Tony?

I remember this one time I was
delivering pizza at Grand Central

know? So I see this really pretty girl,
so I follow her on a train, right? I

struck up a conversation by Newark. You
know, pepperoni's a hell of an

icebreaker.

Anyway, we're in love by Cleveland.

And if I don't get thrown off that train
in Chicago, I got two kids in college

right now.

Oh, oh.

That's so romantic.

When I think of some of the crazy things
I've done.

Yes, mother.

Oh, I can't tell you that one.

I promised the senator.

But I can tell you about the time I date
and I snuck into the drive -in movie in

the trunk of a car.

Oh, Mona, I do that all the time when I
was a teenager.

This was last week.

Oh, wow.

Those were the days. Come on. Angela,
didn't you ever do anything wild?

Oh, let me think.

Don't bother.

Come on, Mona, seriously.

Angela, didn't you ever call up the
supermarket and ask them if they have

oil in a bottle?

Why should I do that?

You call them, right? You say, you got
olive oil in a bottle? They say, yeah.

You say, you better let her out.
Popeye's getting mad.

My, the things I've missed in my youth.

If I only had it to do over again, I
would sew a wild oat or two.

Angela, you wouldn't know a wild oat if
it hit you in the feed bag.

Oh, no, I can be just as wild and crazy
as the next guy. Yeah, the next guy's

Mother Teresa.

Okay, laugh if you will.

I'm going to do it.

I'm going to do all the things that I
didn't do when I was growing up. I'm

to be wild and crazy and daring.

I'm going to fly by the seat of my
pants.

I'm going to be free and spontaneous.

Well, what are you doing?

Making a list of all the spontaneous
things I'm going to do.

After you, after you. Hello, Mona.
Hello.

Hello, Sam.

What's new?

Dad, you are really maturing.

Weren't you worried about me being out
all night? Are you kidding me, Sam? I

have a tremendous amount of respect for
your good sense. And besides, I paid

Ernie at the falafel stand to keep an
eye on you.

You paid a falafel man to spy on me?
Yeah, the guy in the yogurt stand costs

much.

He should.

You know, he's a lot cuter. Get up, Sam.
Get up.

Well, did you two have fun sowing wild
oats?

Fun, Mona? You say fun? We're talking
thrills. We're talking chills.

Me and Angel took a walk on the wild
side.

Oh, Mother, you'd be so proud of me. I
broke the law.

You know those little tags that they
tell you not to remove from mattresses?

Well... Federal offense.

Yeah, and hey, I drove the getaway car.

Well, that should put you on the 10
least wanted list.

Hey, Mona, Mona, it was unbelievable,
Mona. She was out of control, Mona.

We're in a crowded elevator, right? She
does this.

What? Everybody started looking at me.

And then, to top it all off, we went to
the plaza and we crashed a wedding.

You know what a minister says? Speak
now, forever hold your peace.

She didn't. She did.

I said you have a terrible caterer. And
I ran like hell.

Angela, I didn't know you could be so
rude and crude.

I have a new respect for you.

But I'll tell you something, Angela. I,
for one, am glad you got this all out of

your system. Oh, no, no.

No, there are a lot of other things on
this list that I want to do.

Like this.

I can't do this. Oh, come on, come on.
Let's see. No, no, no, no. It's silly.

It's silly. It's silly. I shouldn't have
even put it on the list.

Go to Inspiration Point with Jake the
Snake McGuire.

The Snake.

He was the wildest kid in school, and
when he walked down the hall, all the

girls held their breath and their
jewelry.

He had a DA and a leather jacket and
tight jeans, and he didn't just talk, he

hissed. I didn't know you went for guys
like that. I thought you liked boys that

had those little safety pins on their
glasses.

Mother, on the outside, I may have
looked like Sandra Dee, but on the

Tina Louise was trying to come out.

But Jake used to ride this motorcycle,
and he took all the coolest girls in

to a special place called Inspiration
Point.

Now, wait a minute. Hold on a second.
How did you make out on a motorcycle?

It can be done.

Well, listen, whatever happened to this
snake dude?

I don't know. I don't know. I didn't see
him after I went off to Montague

Academy. God knows where he is now.

Right here, under the M's. Look,
McGuire, Jake.

Really?

No, no, no. I really can't call him. He
wouldn't remember me.

Such a crazy thing to do.

Give me that book.

Well, Mona, what do you think? You think
we should give her some privacy?

No. Me either.

Hello? Is this Jake the Snake?

school together.

Uh, my name was Angela Robinson.

Uh, yeah, I didn't think you would.

Uh, thick glasses, uh, buck teeth,
slightly overweight.

Picture the Hindenburg with bangs.

Yeah, that's me.

Okay. Oh, no, I've changed.

Yeah, well, the, uh, the braces worked
and so did the clearasil and, uh, the

metrical just melted away those
unsightly pounds.

Uh, um,

So, is there a Mrs. Snake in your life?

He's single.

Well, I was just wondering what you
would think about maybe

going out for a drink or something
tonight?

Busy guy.

Yeah, sure.

3344 Oak Hills Drive.

Okay. Well, yeah, I'll see you then.

It worked out so good, too. It's not
even a school night.

Oh, no. I have an unsightly blemish.

Looks like a big zit to me.

Well, thank you, Mother, but nobody but
you will notice.

Whoa, Angela.

Man, you look terrific.

What's that on your forehead?

Is it Ash Wednesday?

I wonder what old Jake looks like now.

Yeah, you know. Hey, Angel, don't get
your hopes up. You know, people change.

This guy could be bald, fat, and wearing
a truss.

That's him, Angela.

Angela, don't you know anything about
dating?

No, of course you don't.

I answer the door. You go upstairs and
make an entrance.

Hey, where does the housekeeper stand?

On that spot in the carpet.

Angela, you look great. You really
filled out.

Is he in for a rude awakening?

Come in. Actually, I am Angela's mother.

Hello, Mama.

And this is Tony Maselli, our
housekeeper. How you doing? How you

Can I take your helmet? No, I'm cool.

Oh, uh, Angela, dear.

Jake is here.

Thank you, Mother. I'll be down in a
minute.

Jake!

Angela?

You went from a walrus to a fox.

Thank you.

You look exactly the same as when you
graduated.

I didn't graduate.

I decided to pursue my other interests.

Like what?

Sleeping late, hanging around, and
bumming.

Nice work, if you can get it.

Well, I'd love to stay and kick it
around with you folks, but me and my

digging down the mason jar tonight, so
we really ought to hit it there, Angie.

Okay.

The mason jar. Wait, isn't that the
place we used to play back in high

Same bar, same band, same three chords.

Uh, Angie, uh, dear, could I have a
quick rap session with you before you

out? Excuse me, I'll just be a minute.

So you're a housekeeper, huh? Yeah.
Well, that's my gig, Jake.

Call me Snake.

You got a nickname, Tony? Oh, yeah, uh,
call me Broom. Broom.

Mother, what are you talking about?
You're being ridiculous.

Angela, I know men. You don't.

You are out of your league.

Mother, this is all perfectly innocent.

Angela, you are perfectly innocent.

He is a snake.

I don't want you going out with that
sleazy rider.

Wait a minute.

Are you forbidding me to go?

Forbidding you?

Yes, I guess I am. Oh. Oh, that's
wonderful.

Now I can cross number 11 off my list.

Defy mother.

Wait. Oh, Jake, I'm ready to feel the
wind through my hair. Your brain bumper.

Oh.

Angela. Yes, Tony. Whatever you do, keep
your feet on the pegs and lean into the

turns and hold on to his luggage rack.

Angie, your hog awaits.

Later on, Mrs. R. Later, broom. Keep
sweeping.

Later.

I don't feel good about this.

Angela has turned into a motorcycle
mama.

Come on, Mona. Come on. She's going to
be fine.

Oh, I hope she doesn't come back with a
tattoo.

Excuse me, do you have any dental floss?
I think I have a gnat pot in my teeth.

I told you not to open your mouth on the
turnpike.

Time to rock and

roll.

Dedicate this song to a very special
lady from my past.

Number 18, romantic song sung for me.

said that she could stay at Bonnie's
until 11 o 'clock?

I'm talking about Angela.

And what kind of mother are you? You let
your daughter go out with Fonzie's evil

twin.

Do you know how all this started?

It was started because you let Sam stand
in line for tickets to that concert.

Mona, it was you who told me to let her
do that. Yeah.

So I guess we have to share the blame.

Where did we go wrong?

Now the state's fair.

It's just me standing there with
emptiness all around.

If you won't come back to me, well, they
can just bring the curtain down.

Is your heart filled with pain?

Can I come back again?

Tell me, dear.

Music really gives me a buzz. That was
wonderful.

Thank you. Tonight has been really
groovy.

Speaking of grooving, Angie, what say...

We'll go someplace, you know, kind of
quiet. Just you and me.

Where might that be?

Well, I got this special place. I like
to call it Inspiration Point.

Do I look like that kind of girl?

Yeah, I think you do.

Well, thank you.

Well, wait a minute. You've had a few
too many pictures. We shouldn't drive.

We can walk.

Oh, an evening stroll.

What is this? Where are we? Welcome to
Inspiration Point.

This room is Inspiration Point?

Not exactly.

This is...

Oh, excuse me. Hiya, sailor. What ship
did you get off the SS Hunk?

I'm looking for a blonde.

I could be a blonde.

I could be whatever you want.

Yeah, well, how about helpful?

Listen, I'm looking for a blonde about 5
'7". Well, I thought Inspiration Point

was this beautiful place high on a hill
where you could see trees and fields and

a sky full of stars.

Yeah, if you lay down, you'd be a big
dipper.

Yeah, it's a dusty job, but, hey,
somebody's got to do it, right?

But, hey, I got a great place to live,
and my boss is real nice.

Except lately, she's been acting a
little alone.

Angela? You like screaming? I can
scream.

Hey, what are you doing? Get away from
her.

Okay, that's all you want.

Oh, my gosh.

I didn't want to do it, but he had it
coming.

Right? I heard you scream.

Tony, Tony, it was just awful.

It was the biggest cockroach I've ever
seen.

Cockroach? I thought the snake was
putting the moves on you. Well, he was,

could handle him.

Tony, what are you doing here?

Well, I was in the neighborhood.

You? were worried about me.

Oh, no, no, no. I'm not one of them
overprotective housekeepers.

Oh, right.

Well, so much for wild oat sowing.

Had such high hopes for tonight.

You know, Angela, sometimes I think it's
hard to relive something that you never

lived in the first place.

Yeah, I think this ratty old sofa was
inspiration point.

Sometimes, some things are better left
to your imagination.

Ah, don't worry about it, Angela. Hey,
whatever happens, we'll always have

Oh, Tony, this is better than I ever
imagined.

Thank you for bringing me up here.

What are you doing?

Crossing number 16 off my list. Go to
Inspiration Point.

Hey, wait a minute.

What's this one now? Mike Ott at
Inspiration Point.

Oh, that's, um, Make Out.

Oh.

Well, that's too bad that you didn't get
to finish your list.

Yeah, yeah.

I got so close.

I guess it's something that you really
wanted, too, you know.

Well, yeah, I mean, it would give me a
real sense of completion.

Completion's good.

Completion's good.