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There is more to life than what you're
lit. Take a chance and face the wind.
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Open road and a road that's hit. Brand
new life around the bend.
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There were times I lost a dream or two.
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Found a trail.
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At the end was you.
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There's a path we take and a path not
taken. The choice is up to you, my
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The nights are long, but you might awake
to a brand new life, brand new life,
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brand new life around the bend.
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Telling you that's him.
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You're famous, right?
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No. You're that good -looking Italian
guy, right?
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Well... Rambo, right?
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No.
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What have I seen you in?
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How about rubber gloves and an apron?
I'm a housekeeper.
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Oh, come on. You're just a housekeeper.
What are you doing in the fanciest hotel
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in Beverly Hills?
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Well, actually, I'm here with my boss,
see?
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Her husband's getting remarried. Well,
actually, it's her ex -husband, you see.
20
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It all started back home in Connecticut.
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Angela, I want to get married again.
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Oh.
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Michael.
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Her name is Heather.
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How would you like to come to California
and be the best man at my wedding,
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little tiger?
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Yeah.
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Oh, all right. Why don't we all go?
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So long, winter coats and mufflers.
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00:02:06,630 --> 00:02:08,750
Hello, tank tops and bikini. Hey.
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Oh, listen.
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Tomorrow we were thinking of taking a
ride to the beach and showing you all
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ocean. Yeah.
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Oh, it's not really ours, but they let
us use it.
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Probably didn't want to get you wet.
36
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Angela,
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you know, since Heather and I are
getting married and settling down, well,
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know how much fun it's been to have
Jonathan with us.
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Well, you can see how much he likes
California.
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What are you saying?
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He wants custody of Jonathan.
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Can you believe the nerve of this guy?
He wants Jonathan to come live here for
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six months out of every year. No way. No
way is he getting custody. No way. You
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mean you're really just a housekeeper?
45
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Yeah. Come on, Harry. He's nobody.
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I told you he wasn't anyone.
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Good luck, Harry.
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get you anything else?
49
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Yes. Bring me the head of Michael Bauer.
50
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I'll check with the chef.
51
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Hey.
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So? What happened?
53
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Did you call your lawyer? Oh, yes.
54
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She called him. But do you think he was
there?
55
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He was in court. Ha!
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And he calls himself a lawyer.
57
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Hey, you know...
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00:03:57,980 --> 00:04:00,760
What is it with Michael? All of a sudden
he wants to be a dad so much? Where was
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he in the tough times, huh? When
Jonathan was sick or when he woke up
60
00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:07,760
night? Yeah, and what about the time he
fell off the jungle gym and you had to
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00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:08,960
race him to the hospital?
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00:04:09,820 --> 00:04:11,060
Wait a minute, that wasn't you.
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Oh, that was Kramer versus Kramer.
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If Michael wants to live out some
fantasy with a 24 -year -old nymphette
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named after a shrub, that's fine with
me.
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00:04:23,340 --> 00:04:25,620
But he can't have my son.
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Excuse me?
68
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Got another dumb meeting.
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Michael's in for some fight.
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Yeah, I just hope Angela wins.
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What? She's got a good lawyer, right?
Yes, Tony, but in a case like this,
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lawyers are at a disadvantage.
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What do you mean?
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Well, they can't fight dirty.
75
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But grandmothers can.
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Mona, whatever you're thinking of doing,
I want in.
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that tells all about being the best man.
78
00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:03,940
Ooh, sounds like something you need.
79
00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:05,139
That's what I thought.
80
00:05:05,140 --> 00:05:06,140
Three bucks.
81
00:05:07,060 --> 00:05:08,060
Okay.
82
00:05:08,260 --> 00:05:10,300
One, two, three. There you go.
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Thanks.
84
00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:13,040
Hey, sweetheart.
85
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Oh, hi, Mom.
86
00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:15,700
Hi, Lee. Come on.
87
00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:18,360
I have to buy a best man magazine.
88
00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:20,460
Oh. Well, could you use some money?
89
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Sure. Three bucks.
90
00:05:26,140 --> 00:05:28,220
Okay. One, two, three.
91
00:05:31,980 --> 00:05:32,980
Don't push your luck.
92
00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:35,840
Bye, Mom. Bye, darling.
93
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Hey, look who's here.
94
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:47,200
Michael, this hotel is not big enough
for the two of us.
95
00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:48,480
May I have a nice tea?
96
00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:51,240
Oh, come on, Angela. Can't we be nice
about this?
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Fine. You want to be nice?
98
00:05:54,100 --> 00:05:55,100
I'll be nice.
99
00:05:55,370 --> 00:05:59,150
I'll come to your wedding. I'll even buy
you a present. That'll be great. We're
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registered at Neiman Marcus.
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00:06:01,990 --> 00:06:04,850
I'm only doing this for Jonathan's sake,
and I don't want him to know anything
102
00:06:04,850 --> 00:06:08,990
about this until after the lawyers have
settled it. Oh, Angela, did you have to
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00:06:08,990 --> 00:06:10,450
go and get your lawyer involved?
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Yes.
105
00:06:12,090 --> 00:06:13,870
Well, my lawyer says I'll win.
106
00:06:15,610 --> 00:06:18,190
Did your lawyer also tell you what you'd
be doing to Jonathan?
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Taking him away from school and his
friends and everything he's used to?
108
00:06:21,810 --> 00:06:23,070
but I'll also be giving him something.
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Me.
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Oh, and you just love to find that in a
Cracker Jack box.
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Look, Angela, look at the facts. A
married couple versus a single working
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who leaves her son with a housekeeper
all day?
113
00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:38,020
Tony is more than just a housekeeper.
Oh?
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He knows a lot more about raising
children than you do. Well, I know
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about children.
116
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What do you know about children?
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Well, I used to be one.
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You still are one.
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Sticks and stones, Angela.
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Oh, Michael, grow up.
121
00:07:02,060 --> 00:07:06,900
Well, so, the best man has to carry the
ring, and you also have to make the
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toast at the wedding.
123
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But they're not having toast. They're
having little quiches.
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00:07:12,240 --> 00:07:15,860
Oh, no. No, Jonathan, that's a different
kind of toast. This is when you stand
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up and you say something real nice about
your dad.
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Don't worry, sweetheart.
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You can't think of anything everyone
will understand.
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00:07:24,030 --> 00:07:27,330
But what about the bachelor party? We
need entertainment.
129
00:07:28,270 --> 00:07:29,910
Hey, how about mud wrestling?
130
00:07:31,110 --> 00:07:34,550
I don't think your father expects you to
throw him a bachelor party.
131
00:07:34,810 --> 00:07:38,530
But I have to. I'm the best man. I know
Daddy will want it.
132
00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:41,350
Well, Daddy can't always have everything
he wants.
133
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But I want to wrestle in mud.
134
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Wait, wait, wait. What if I help him
with it, huh?
135
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And we'll do it right here. And we'll
make it so wholesome even you could
136
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No, you can't. No girls allowed.
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Hey, get out of here.
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We'll keep it clean, Angela.
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All right.
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Yay! All right, buddy.
141
00:08:01,330 --> 00:08:02,330
What do you got in mind?
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00:08:02,570 --> 00:08:04,490
Well, first we need stag film.
143
00:08:09,330 --> 00:08:13,350
And as the herd moves south for the
winter, we say goodbye.
144
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to the majestic northern hell.
145
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Hey. Well, that was some great stag
film, right, guys?
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00:08:24,230 --> 00:08:27,050
Hey, hey, hey. Hey, look at this. Debbie
does Dallas.
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00:08:28,970 --> 00:08:29,970
All right, man.
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Time for the whippier chuggalug. Hey,
Michael,
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00:08:35,789 --> 00:08:37,270
congratulations. Oh, thanks, Tony.
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00:08:37,590 --> 00:08:41,570
You're one lucky guy, huh? What a life
you got. I mean, you and Heather...
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Traveling around the world, just you and
her.
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In the jungle.
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In a tent.
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In a sleeping bag.
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Well, but I guess it's worth giving all
that up, huh?
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What do you mean?
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00:08:53,380 --> 00:08:55,980
Well, I mean, once Jonathan's in school,
you know, Heather's going to have to
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stay with him.
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00:08:57,340 --> 00:08:58,340
Well, that's no good.
160
00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:00,620
Yeah, well, I had a feeling you'd see it
that way.
161
00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:02,640
Well, we'll have to hire a tutor.
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00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:07,760
A what? A tutor. Yeah, well, that'd be
great. Listen, Jonathan will learn more
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00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,680
on these trips than he ever would in any
classroom. Thanks, Tony. Okay.
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00:09:13,369 --> 00:09:14,369
Excuse me.
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00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:16,490
It's time for one of the bachelors to go
to bed.
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Hey, the party's picking up.
167
00:09:22,050 --> 00:09:24,990
Angel, let him stay up for five more
minutes just for the toast. All right,
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on, buddy. You're on.
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00:09:27,830 --> 00:09:32,290
Here's to my dad.
170
00:09:35,310 --> 00:09:38,310
I'm glad he's marrying Heather because I
like being with them.
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And she has a convertible.
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00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:44,540
My dad wanted me to be the best man.
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But I think he's the best.
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And I love him.
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I love you, too.
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And now for dessert.
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Wait a minute, buddy. We didn't order
dessert. You didn't, but I did.
178
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Maybe not this one. Maybe yours.
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00:10:42,510 --> 00:10:44,950
When I grow up? Yeah, that's right, when
you grow up.
180
00:10:45,310 --> 00:10:49,270
Well, I wish I were growing up now. Then
I wouldn't be so scared.
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00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:50,710
Wait a minute, will you?
182
00:10:51,070 --> 00:10:52,830
You're telling me you're nervous about
this wedding?
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00:10:53,430 --> 00:10:56,130
Hey, well, don't worry about it, buddy,
because everybody gets scared.
184
00:10:56,630 --> 00:10:58,430
Not you, Tony. You're cool.
185
00:10:59,090 --> 00:11:04,810
Well... Maybe now I'm cool, but when I
was your age... Hey, let me tell you a
186
00:11:04,810 --> 00:11:05,810
story. Come here.
187
00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:13,300
When I was your age, I was the second
wise man in the Christmas school play,
188
00:11:13,420 --> 00:11:15,220
okay? You know the one with the
frankincense?
189
00:11:15,480 --> 00:11:16,480
And you were scared?
190
00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:19,000
Well, I wasn't scared. I was petrified.
191
00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:23,900
But you did great, right? Well, I
dropped the frankincense, and I threw up
192
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:24,900
baby Jesus.
193
00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:29,160
Boy, was Johnny Drago mad. He was baby
Jesus.
194
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:34,500
So, anyway, the moral of the story is
that everybody gets scared.
195
00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:39,660
But I figure, if you keep your lunch
down, You two stepped ahead of me.
196
00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:43,840
Thanks, Tony. I needed that. All right,
my buddy.
197
00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:47,720
Angela, I need your finger.
198
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:49,160
Oh.
199
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:50,400
Here we go.
200
00:11:50,900 --> 00:11:52,000
What did you get them, Mother?
201
00:11:52,620 --> 00:11:53,620
A walk.
202
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,500
Oh, no, that's what I got them.
203
00:11:55,740 --> 00:11:56,920
Oh, well, that's perfect.
204
00:11:57,340 --> 00:11:59,080
Well, why? They don't need two walks.
205
00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:03,220
No, but I need a walk. So you put my
name on your gift, and I'll take this
206
00:12:03,220 --> 00:12:04,220
home.
207
00:12:08,940 --> 00:12:10,060
Heather and Mike will need a walk.
208
00:12:12,020 --> 00:12:15,020
Sweetheart, we're ready to go. Let's go,
baby. Let's hit it. Let's move it. I'm
209
00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:16,020
not going.
210
00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:18,480
Watch what happened.
211
00:12:18,580 --> 00:12:21,620
I'm not going out in public like this.
212
00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:23,320
I look like a zebra.
213
00:12:24,540 --> 00:12:26,000
Look at that. That's nice.
214
00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:34,160
Why don't...
215
00:12:37,680 --> 00:12:41,100
Don't you get seated, and I'll take
Jonathan to find Michael. Okay. Now,
216
00:12:41,100 --> 00:12:44,620
minute. I know you're going to do great
out there. All right, buddy?
217
00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,300
Go get him, baby.
218
00:12:47,620 --> 00:12:51,320
Okay. Hey, Sam, it's still kind of warm.
219
00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:57,020
Sweetheart, you look so handsome.
220
00:12:57,840 --> 00:12:59,540
Yeah? Yeah. Just like Daddy?
221
00:13:01,540 --> 00:13:03,900
Sam, you're his...
222
00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:12,280
So go find your daddy. He's waiting for
you.
223
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:13,920
Oh.
224
00:13:14,580 --> 00:13:15,580
Okay, ready? Yeah.
225
00:13:21,980 --> 00:13:22,980
Well,
226
00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:30,660
this is it. You all ready?
227
00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:32,940
Well, I'm kind of scared.
228
00:13:48,140 --> 00:13:49,420
I don't have any ginger ale now.
229
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,760
Come on, come on, this is my big moment
now.
230
00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:37,880
She is beautiful.
231
00:14:37,940 --> 00:14:40,020
Ah, give her 20 years.
232
00:14:56,460 --> 00:15:00,400
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here
today to join together this man...
233
00:15:06,350 --> 00:15:08,530
of matrimony is not one to be entered
into lightly.
234
00:15:08,970 --> 00:15:10,430
Dad, I mean it.
235
00:15:10,790 --> 00:15:11,890
Jonathan, please.
236
00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:17,690
If any man can show just cause why these
two should not be lawfully joined, let
237
00:15:17,690 --> 00:15:20,210
him speak now or forever hold his peace.
238
00:15:25,370 --> 00:15:27,070
He's tossing his cookies.
239
00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:45,200
Didn't that ginger ale make everything
feel better?
240
00:15:45,620 --> 00:15:48,180
No. I ruined everything.
241
00:15:48,780 --> 00:15:50,160
No, you didn't, sweetheart.
242
00:15:50,640 --> 00:15:52,780
Everything is going to be fine, I
promise.
243
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:56,040
Mom, I threw up on the bride.
244
00:15:57,500 --> 00:16:03,040
Well, honey, in some countries, that's a
tradition.
245
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:23,480
Angela always took care of that kind of
thing.
246
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:24,720
Oh, really?
247
00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:26,520
Didn't she think it was disgusting?
248
00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:31,320
Excuse me, folks. Could we finish tying
the knot?
249
00:16:31,580 --> 00:16:33,000
I have a chili cook -off to bless.
250
00:16:41,940 --> 00:16:42,940
Angela?
251
00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:44,440
In here, Tony.
252
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:49,240
How's he doing?
253
00:16:49,580 --> 00:16:51,460
He's sleeping quietly now, but...
254
00:16:52,110 --> 00:16:55,610
Before he was having terrible dreams
about dropping frankincense.
255
00:16:56,830 --> 00:17:00,030
Hey, don't worry about it. It's a common
childhood nightmare.
256
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:01,830
Let's let him sleep.
257
00:17:05,910 --> 00:17:07,109
I'm really going to miss him.
258
00:17:08,270 --> 00:17:10,130
Angela, we're just going to be in the
other room here. Come on.
259
00:17:11,130 --> 00:17:12,770
Tony, I know you don't want to hear
this.
260
00:17:14,030 --> 00:17:15,450
But I've decided not to fight.
261
00:17:16,310 --> 00:17:17,849
I'm going to give Michael joint custody.
262
00:17:19,230 --> 00:17:20,849
You're right. I don't want to hear this.
263
00:17:27,799 --> 00:17:29,480
Did you see what I saw tonight?
264
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:31,640
Yeah, it was great, all over her shoes.
265
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:36,960
That little boy is so anxious to please
his father that he made himself sick.
266
00:17:37,780 --> 00:17:38,800
All right, all right.
267
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,780
So, buy her a new pair of shoes, but
keep your son.
268
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,000
Tony, I've made up my mind. Oh, yeah?
269
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:46,720
Well, did you think what it's going to
be like around the house without
270
00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:48,060
Jonathan? I'll miss him.
271
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:50,920
We'll miss him.
272
00:17:52,590 --> 00:17:55,650
But isn't that a selfish reason to keep
a boy away from his father?
273
00:17:56,450 --> 00:17:58,290
Selfish is good if it's for the right
reasons.
274
00:17:58,510 --> 00:17:59,790
Jonathan loves Michael.
275
00:18:00,210 --> 00:18:01,210
Hey, oh.
276
00:18:01,670 --> 00:18:03,110
Jonathan loves you, too.
277
00:18:10,650 --> 00:18:12,290
Michael. Hi.
278
00:18:12,490 --> 00:18:15,230
Is Jonathan feeling better? Yeah, he's
sleeping.
279
00:18:15,530 --> 00:18:16,530
How's Heather?
280
00:18:16,630 --> 00:18:18,490
Well, she's barefoot and married.
281
00:18:19,930 --> 00:18:20,930
Congratulations.
282
00:18:21,620 --> 00:18:24,100
Listen, Angela, I'd like to talk to you
about Jonathan.
283
00:18:24,360 --> 00:18:25,119
Me too.
284
00:18:25,120 --> 00:18:26,120
Angela.
285
00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:29,840
All right, all right, all right, all
right, but I ain't gonna watch.
286
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:31,780
I'm gonna go hang up Jonathan's jacket.
287
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:40,780
Angela, um, Heather and I talked about
it, and, well, I just don't think that
288
00:18:40,780 --> 00:18:44,560
we're ready to be full -time parents,
even on a part -time basis.
289
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,160
You mean you're not gonna take him?
290
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:50,360
I thought you were going to hang up a
jacket.
291
00:18:50,590 --> 00:18:51,710
I did. It didn't take long.
292
00:18:53,370 --> 00:18:54,690
You don't want custody?
293
00:18:55,270 --> 00:18:56,270
Listen, Angela,
294
00:18:56,990 --> 00:19:01,790
Jonathan is a wonderful boy, and, well,
you've done a great job with him. Oh,
295
00:19:01,790 --> 00:19:02,790
you bet she is.
296
00:19:03,130 --> 00:19:10,010
But, well, Heather and I just got
married, and I think we need some
297
00:19:10,010 --> 00:19:11,010
time to be alone together.
298
00:19:11,370 --> 00:19:12,289
In a tent.
299
00:19:12,290 --> 00:19:14,050
In a sleeping bag.
300
00:19:15,050 --> 00:19:17,590
So, I gotta be going.
301
00:19:17,950 --> 00:19:19,490
I got a bride waiting downstairs.
302
00:20:15,590 --> 00:20:16,590
Mind if we dance?
303
00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:18,830
Well, she's at the bar.
304
00:20:21,810 --> 00:20:25,470
You know,
305
00:20:34,510 --> 00:20:36,510
I can't understand Michael.
306
00:20:37,710 --> 00:20:41,470
I mean, he's got the chance to spend the
rest of his life with a great kid like
307
00:20:41,470 --> 00:20:42,470
Jonathan.
308
00:20:45,350 --> 00:20:47,330
You should have every lawyer in the
country fight you on this.
309
00:20:47,890 --> 00:20:48,890
Don't tell him that.
310
00:20:50,010 --> 00:20:51,170
What do you expect, huh?
311
00:20:51,630 --> 00:20:53,310
Of course he's going to walk away from
Jonathan.
312
00:20:53,510 --> 00:20:55,170
He was dumb enough to walk away from
you.
23856
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