All language subtitles for happy_days_s09e08_just_a_piccalo

Sunday, Monday, happy days. Tuesday,
Wednesday, happy days.

Thursday, Friday, happy days.

The weekend comes, my cycle hums. Ready
to race to you.

These days are ours.

Happy and free.

Happy days.

These days are ours.

Share them with me.

Goodbye, gray sky, yellow blue.

There's nothing can hold me when I hold
you.

So right, it can't be wrong.

Rockin' and rollin' all week long.

Sunday,

Monday, happy days.

Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days.

Thursday, Friday, happy days.

Saturday, what a day.

Groovin' all week with you.

I know you'll get to like it if you give
it a chance. Ah,

here

we are.

Two lovely flowers for Milwaukee's
loveliest flowers.

Oh, what a lovely car.

Well, I thought I'd give the place a
little class.

Well, they're beautiful.

Oh, they're plastic.

Yeah, Clarence made them.

I got us some old lawn furniture.

He's very artistic.

You never hit the lawn. It's a little
dusting, maybe, but it's all good.

Jokes, there they are. There who are?

Only the president and vice president of
the Rondells.

Janina, don't start with me again. I
don't want to join the Rondells. I've

already turned them down. Turned them
down? Have you gone mad?

They've got a great club.

When they have parties, all the cutest
guys in school are there.

How do you know?

I never invited you to any of their
parties.

Oh, I crashed one once.

And the guys that dragged me out were
the cutest guys I've ever seen.

Strong, too.

Jenny, I don't care about that. I am
very happy with Georgie.

Oh, sure.

Sure, care only about yourself.

And I thought you were my friend.

I am your friend. Great. Then join the
Rondells.

How does that help you?

Because they don't want me. But they're
dying to have you join. So I figure you

tell them you'll join, but only if
they'll take me, too. What do you think?

Why would you want to join a club that
thinks you're garbage?

That's good they have standards.

Oh, I see.

So not only do I have to join a club
that I don't want to join, but I have to

plead with them to let you in also?

Exactly. It's either that, Jones, or I
could go back to hanging around at the

YMCA.

You'd hang around at the YMCA?

Oh, Jones, I have no life.

All right, all right.

Oh, Marilyn.

Oh, Stephanie.

How nice to see you again. Hello. Hello.

You know Jenny Piccolo?

We've met.

Briefly. We were going into a party
while she was being dragged out by her

Listen, girls, if you'd still like me to
join the rondelles, I'd be happy to.

That's charming. How nice.

There's just one thing. What?

My friend Jenny here would like to be in
also.

Excuse us.

Oh, that means I'm in. I'm a Rondell.
Thank you.

Wait, then look alike.

Of course.

You must each complete one pledge
assignment.

Fine. All right, Pledge Cunningham,
here's your assignment.

By this coming Friday, you are to find a
copy of the Milwaukee Telephone

Directory.

And? Well, there is no and. That's it.

I can handle that.

That copy of the Milwaukee Directory.

No problem.

And memorize every number in it.

I better call Kelly's house at beef and
tell them we'll be late.

That's Claybrook 51226.

Jenny, do you mean to tell me you
memorized the whole telephone book just

join a club?

I want...

march through that awful swamp and crawl
through all that gooey mud to get in

that fraternity? That was the army,
Mary.

Are you girls ready to fulfill your
pledge assignments?

Here is the telephone book.

Congratulations, Joanie. You are
officially a rondelle.

Good. Can I take off the hat now?

Now, Jenny.

We're terribly sorry if your assignment
was too difficult.

What? Try me. Is she serious?

Try her.

Okay, Jenny.

Arthur Abb.

Zenith 51227.

Albert Aaron.

Winsbury 61445.

Heiberg 65771.

That's it. I did it. I'm around now.

I did it. I did it. When do I get my
sweater?

Don't jump on the furniture.

Yes. You have just completed the first
part of your assignment.

First part? Wait a second. You said she
only had to do one thing.

Yes, but it's just a little thing.

What is it?

She has to take the statue of General
Pfister out of Pfister Park and bring it

to our clubhouse. Hey, that's very good.
Are you crazy? That's stealing.

You know, you may have a hot club. I'll
do it. Have it there tomorrow night.

Bye -bye.

Jones, I want this.

The next thing you'll want me to do is
go to the park and help you.

Would you go to the park and help me?

If we can do anything together, Joanie,
what happened to that old Jenny -Joanie

team spirit?

You're crazy. Why don't you call a
psychiatrist? Any psychiatrist. You know

the numbers. I'd do it for you, Joanie.

That's what friendship is all about, but
of course, you wouldn't know anything

about that.

I have a date with Chachi tomorrow
night. I can't.

Oh, sure.

A date with Chachi is more important to
you than your best friend.

Oh, Jenny, you got me so confused.

made into boots.

The cat's going to catch your tongue in
a minute.

Do you have any idea what this is?

This is a genuine Eskimo muckluck.

They're awfully pretty.

Know who sent them to me? Who? Your
brother, my friend.

They look real comfortable. No, they're
not. They stink.

They make my feet itch.

They're hard to get on.

But my friend sent them to me. You know
how I got them?

I'll tell you.

I was having a casual conversation with
Richie.

And I said, you know, I'd like to try a
pair of Eskimo mukluks.

He flies 200 miles north.

He sits in an igloo, freezing to death,
eating raw fish, waiting for these to be

made to order, huh?

And then he sends me these.

Now that is friendship.

Richie, the kind of guy that goes out
for you anywhere, anytime, huh?

Come on, Jenny, if we're going to do
this, let's get it done quick.

fast as I can. This jackhammer is heavy.

It's not too late. Let's go.

Jones, don't chicken out on me now.

I need you. You're my friend, aren't
you?

I'm your friend.

Well, here it is.

For such a big hero, why such a small
statue?

General Obadiah Tinyfister, the only
three -foot, eleven -inch officer to

in the Union Army and the circus?

I'll bet he's served under everybody.

Come on, Jones. We don't have time for
this. Get that crowbar. Come on.

Look at that.

Died for his country in the Battle of
Gettysburg when he fell into a foxhole

couldn't climb out.

Jones, come on. That cop will be back
any minute. Use the crowbar.

Jenny, don't you think he's suffered
enough?

Besides, I don't think he's going to
come out with just a crowbar. Give it a

try. Jenny,

the general's lost his head. Quick,
somebody's coming.

Here goes nothing.

11 inches tall.

All right. Where's General Sister?

I'm booking you on a 121 defacing a
public midget.

You girls are in big trouble.

Sometimes you want to go where everybody
knows your name.

Rush face. Maggot. Bladder polyp.
Hideous gargoyle. Dirty farm boy.

Spencer Quack. Wussy Little Freddy Cat.
Hair, hair.

Troglodyte. Hamhawk. So join Troglodyte,
Hamhawk, and the rest of the gang at

Cheers every night on TV Land. Don't
forget to tell your friends about

Dad, this is dumb.

It's go time.

Oh, boy.

Here's one way to get computer help.

Target in sight.

Can I help you?

Not a word of this to your mother.

Hang on.

Here we go. What do you want from me? I
want you to make... Go

away.

Please. Don't go there. Go down. Hey,
there's a reason people gave Dell an A

-plus for service and reliability.

First, Dell makes rock -solid PCs you
can count on. Then, they stand behind

24 -7.

Right now, get a huge flat panel display
and an Intel Pentium 4 processor with

this Dimension desktop.

It's just $699 after mail -in rebate.
Plus, you'll get free shipping and a

CD burner.

A PC you can rely on. Thank you!

Easy as death. Dell PCs and Intel
Pentium 4 processor. Come on!

Shh, they're coming.

Oh, what a time for a call. Nose is
running, head's all blocked up. I need

Alcatraz Plus.

I'll get my Alka -Seltzer Plus.

Only Alka -Seltzer Plus has an
effervescent cold -fighting formula to

nasal congestion and release you from
your worst cold symptoms fast.

Were you surprised?

No, it works every time.

Effervescent Alka -Seltzer Plus breaks
up your worst cold symptoms fast. And

now, rush relief with new Alka -Seltzer
Plus Ready Relief Tabs.

Jones, this is the worst night of my
entire life.

You know, when my dad finds out about
this, he will die.

Well, my dad's not going to be too
thrilled either. At least he won't die.

You've never met my father before.

He's a sweet, fragile man.

Jones, he thinks I'm perfect.

Why?

Because I hide things from him. Things
like this.

When he finds out about this, I'm
telling you, he will die.

But don't you think it's a little too
late now?

Jones, if I ask you a question, will you
promise to still be my best friend?

Of course.

When that cop comes back, Why don't you
tell him that you took the statue all by

yourself and that I came down here to
talk you out of it? I'll back you up.

on. Don't, please. I know I'm a low
person.

But do it for my father.

Be a friend.

Oh, come on, Jane. Hello,

officer. We didn't get a chance to chat
before.

I'm sorry you couldn't have been here
sooner to help me talk my friend out of

this bizarre escapade of hers.

Oh, how I tried and tried.

I'm such a bad kid.

This is Mike Joy just fanning me up like
this.

Not even a phone call or anything.

Oh, Howard, I'm scared. Maybe we should
call the police. Oh, Mary, you're

getting upset over nothing.

Nothing?

Tickets to a Chubby Checker concert at
Two Bucks Beach?

You call that nothing?

And what about this belt, Mr. Theon?
Seventy -five cents. Is that nothing,

You know, you're worried about all the
money you spent, and Joanie could have

been in an accident.

Oh, Mike!

No, no, Marion. She wasn't in an
accident. I was just trying to make a

Yeah, and I got a haircut. It cost me
another dollar.

You got robbed. I know.

Put you in there.

Uh, Cunningham, is this your daughter?
Oh, come on, Kirk. You know that's my

daughter. Now, what's going on?

Not so fast, Cunningham. Is this your
daughter?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. That's Michael.

All right, now what happened?

She was trying to steal General
Pfister's statue.

Oh, come on.

Hold it there, Romeo.

Back it up in formation there.

The rest of you take it easy. I'm in
charge here.

Now, Cunningham, since your daughter's a
minor, I'm going to leave her in your

custody. But you'll have to appear in
court.

You'll be properly notified.

And as for the young lady who tried to
talk her out of it, I'd be proud to give

you a personal escort home, little lady.

I'm really sorry.

I don't know what to do. Take a look.

Move it out. Sorry.

Joanie, I can't believe it happened the
way he said it did.

Now, something is rotten here. And I
know who it is. Oh, now, let's not

overreact. We'll have to move away. We
can make a fresh start. Marion!

Now, come on. It couldn't have happened
the way Kirk said.

Our daughter is not a vandal.

I'm right, aren't I, sweetheart?

No, I'm a vandal. I did it.

Oh, sweetheart. Now, if you wanted a
statue, why didn't you tell us? We would

have bought you one.

Are you trying to tell me that you went
to a park to steal a statue when you had

the chance to go with me to see Chubby
Checker in concert, huh?

I don't buy that for a second.

It's true.

And Jenny went there to talk you out of
it. Yeah.

All right, Jody.

I want you to look me straight in the
eye and say that you're telling the

I'm telling you the truth. You're
looking at my chin.

Look me in the eye.

Jenny wanted the statue and I went to
the park to talk her out of it. Now,

Joanie, if Jenny wanted to steal the
statue and you tried to talk her out of

why did you take all the blame?

Well,

it's hard to explain. See, it's
something about protecting her father.

I don't know. She talks faster than I
can listen.

Well, I know one thing. That Jenny
Piccolo has been nothing but trouble

since you met her when you were six
years old.

And I'm going to get her parents on the
phone, tell them to get over here

tomorrow night, and we're going to
straighten this out. No, Dad, you can't

her father. He's a very fragile man.

News like this could kill him.

I'm sorry, Joanie. I don't want to kill
the man, and I'll be as gentle as I can.

But I'm not going to stand by and let
you take the blame for something you

didn't do.

I should have done this years ago.

Tomorrow night, the Cunninghams and the
Piccolos are going to have it out.

The Piccolos are already an hour late.
Another half hour and I'm going to take

this suit off.

Oh, that must be them, huh? Daddy,
Daddy, please try to be gentle with Mr.

Piccolo, okay? Yeah. Johnny, don't
worry. Now your father's going to do the

right thing. Aren't you, Howard? I'll do
my best, Marion.

Howdy, baby!

Hi!

Daddy!

Mr. Piccolo?

What are you doing?

Did you call me?

You call me Roscoe. We're friends.

And this is your lovely daughter,
Joanie. Roscoe, it's nice to meet you.

How are you, sweetheart? Your name's
Joanie? How are you, dear?

No, no. I'm his wife, Marion.

You're kidding me. Oh, you ought to be.

You cradle snatcher, you.

You are lovely.

Marion, you mind if we're alone for a
minute? We'll only take a second. Come

here.

You can confide in me.

What was your name when you were on
stage?

Was he fun working with Marlon Brando?

Jack Lemmon would be good.

You can tell me.

What are you, smuggling basketballs?

Now, here's what I want to tell you.

Seat.

Seat.

Don't you offer a person a seat? Oh,
please, by all means, have a seat.

Thank you, you're all right. I want to
tell you something.

I...

Thank you, thank you.

This is fragile.

Well, you must be, Joanie. Give your
uncle baby a kiss.

She's sweet. Is she adopted?

Uh, Roscoe, where is your wife?

Oh, Rosalie, she's outside waiting in
the car.

Well, why didn't you invite her in?
She's busy changing her tie.

Come here a minute.

Sit down.

Now, you can confide in me.

The marriage.

What were you, 36?

She was 16.

You had money then.

It was your money. Tell me. You can tell
me.

Roscoe, will you listen for a minute? I
asked you over here tonight for a

reason. Hold it.

Is this a touch?

You can have anything. How much do you
need? No. Damn it.

Come in. Come in.

Hi, Daddy.

Tinkerbell Angel, my little sister.

Look at this face.

Did you ever see anything like it?

Elizabeth Taylor as a child?

You see what I mean?

Didn't anybody here see National Velvet?

I don't understand.

He does take you to the movies, doesn't
he? Doesn't he just stay home and roast

peanuts?

Mark Abel?

Jimmy Stewart?

Means nothing to you.

You know, there aren't movies that talk
now, did you know that?

I've got something for you, a little
surprise. Don't be nervous. Just do it

told you. All right.

When there are gray skies... What don't
you mind?

I don't mind the gray skies.

Look, Roscoe... You, you're
interrupting. You make them blue. Join

them blue. No, I've got to take a
breath. Now, wait a minute. You make

blue, sonny boy.

Roscoe, please.

What's wrong with you? We were having
fun. Look, this is important.

Last night, my daughter, Joanie, was
arrested for stealing.

Dear God, Nevin, you're kidding.

That sweet innocent child.

I won't believe it.

Johnny, they can tell this to me a
hundred times.

They will never convince me of this.

Is my wallet in my pocket?

Get out of here.

Daddy.

Daddy, listen to me.

What?

I know this is going to come as a bit of
a shock to you, but... I'm the one that

stole the statue of General Pfister.

You? Me, your little Tinkerbell.

You see, I did it just to get into a
club, and Joan's covered up for me.

I told her she wouldn't take the rap,
that she wouldn't be a friend.

But see, I'm the one who's not a friend
for asking her to do something like

that.

I'm sorry, Joanie.

I'm sorry, Dad.

You can never let me down. What's wrong
with you?

I'm your father. I'm not your enemy.

Besides, girls will be girls.

Look at this face. I wish you were
twins.

Dad, then you're not upset.

Yes, I'm a little upset.

I'm upset that you didn't come to me
right away with this.

You can always talk to your dad.

It's your mother you have to worry
about.

She's a hitter.

I owe you all an apology.

I behaved dreadfully.

Oh, no, you didn't. Not really.

Look, I...

an idea. Why don't we go down to the
police station, straighten this whole

out, then I'll take you all out to
dinner. Great idea!

Some place for dancing.

Marion, save the mambo for me.

That's how she gets very impetuous.
Move, move.

Who

decorated

this place?

Now there's a new way to freshen the
whole room.

Introducing Glade Plug -In Scented Oil
Fan.

The first air freshener that uses an
ultra -quiet fan to actively circulate

favorite fragrance throughout the entire
room.

There.

Isn't that better?

New Glade Plug -In Scented Oil Fan.

Freshness with a spin. Plug it in, plug
it in. Betsy Johnson, a family company.

town tonight and we want you to sing
Lee.

We lost our other singer in Toledo.

Not really sure where that is.

Sometimes you gotta have the Mac. Grab
Easy Mac for the hot cheesy taste they

love. Get them the Mac. Need a snack?

Snack the Mac!

Inside that robot is something familiar.

A battery.

And while you may think all batteries
are the same, listen to this.

It's just the rain. But with his Phonak
hearing aid, he's hearing it for the

first time.

And when Phonak chooses a battery, they
trust Duracell. You heard the rain.

So whether it's a child's hearing or
child's play, it just has to work.

Duracell. Trusted everywhere.

Wherever you go, whatever you go
through.

Dry, scratchy, irritated eyes don't have
to come with the territory.

You've got Visine Tears. When eyes get
dry, scratchy, irritated, Visine Tears

can soothe, moisturize, and protect like
your own natural tears.

And it's safe to use as often as you
need.

Visine Tears. Relieves dry eyes like
your own natural tears.

And when you want to get the red out,
look for Visine Original.

I think everyone dreads hearing the word
cancer, and we weren't much different.

After the initial shock kind of wears
off, you start thinking about, okay,

into this, how are we going to pay for
it?

Physicians Mutual has been a godsend to
us.

It was a very, very big relief to know
that we had made the plans in the past

have this policy, and then to know that
the policy was going to pay what we

thought it was going to pay.

Just within days, we had money. I can't
tell you how nice it is to do business

with a company that actually lives up to
what you think an insurance company

should do.

They were there for us. They did what
they promised.

They did it in a timely manner.

They were there when we needed them.

Physicians Mutual is, without a doubt,
the best insurance company that I've

dealt with in my lifetime.

We're here when you need us.

Physicians Mutual.

And now, a special message from Carol
Burnett.

That concludes our special message.

You're watching TV Land.

That wasn't so bad.

Oh, yeah.

I like to spend my Saturday afternoon
crawling on my knees, picking up garbage

in Pfister Park.

Ooh, there was some pretty disgusting
garbage. Yeah, but it's better than

to jail. Yeah. Besides, I thought that
judge was very nice.

Kind of cute, too.

Give it a rest.

You know something, Jones?

What? I really did embarrass myself in
front of those rondelles.

I let them strip me of all my dignity.

Oh, I hadn't noticed.

Come on, let's go down to Arnold's. I'll
buy you soda. Yeah?

You know what, Jones?

What? I know of a much better club.

A real dignified one.

No pranky acts or anything. This one is
class A all the way. And you can get in?

Easy. Come on.

All we have to do is run the principal's
pants up the flagpole.

The only problem is he has to still be
in them.

And we can handle it.

Come on.

What we're going to do is we're going to
go down to the school.

Next on the Brady Bunch, Greg is hiding
a goat in his bedroom and the second

Gladys from Bewitched is fuming.

It seems a lot weirder than it is. Stay
tuned for Getting Greg's Goat, episode

number 101, next on...