All language subtitles for happy_days_s011e09_you_get_what_you_pay_for

Happy and free.

These days are ours.

Share them with me.

Goodbye gray sky, hello blue. There's
nothing can hold me when I hold you.

It's all right.

It can't be wrong.

Rockin' and rollin' all we know.

Monday, happy days. Wednesday, happy
days.

Friday, happy days.

Saturday, what a day.

Proving I'll meet with you.

These days are ours.

How can I shave like this? The water's
so hot.

I'm going to fix it.

One more, please.

Marry him.

I've got a razor in my hand.

Oh, forget it.

You know, I am sick and tired of having
to shave down here in the living room

while Joanie is up there holding the
bathroom hostage.

She's a young lady now, dear. It takes
her time to put on her face.

Lon Chaney didn't take this long to put
on his face.

I hate shaving downstairs because I
always cut myself.

Oh, gosh.

Now I'm going to be late for work.

Well, Potsy can take over while you're
away.

Potsy, huh?

You're talking about a guy who went out
and bought a rocking chair and then

asked for an instruction booklet.

Well, he's very good at it now.

I wanted to be at the store when that
first shipment of silent toilets

Oh, the whisper flush.

I'm going to demonstrate him at the
hardware convention.

It's going to be a big hit.

Couldn't mean a lot of money for it.

Oh, Howard, I don't need money to be
happy.

Couldn't mean a trip to Sweden.

Marion. Marion, I got a crazy idea.

Oh, Jill, you're already late for work.

Now, this is real wild.

Now, just go along with me.

What would you think if we added a
second bathroom?

Right in the house?

No, sweetheart, in the car.

Of course in the house.

Huh? I mean, the whole works. A shower,
a tub, lock on the door so I don't have

to whistle while I'm in there.

This is instead of the trip to Sweden,
isn't it?

Oh, no, I couldn't do that to you.

No, I guess having a second bathroom is
just a dream.

It's not meant for people like us.

Okay, Jody, your half hour is up.

Get out of there this minute.

But, Dad, I'm not finished doing my
hair.

You want to bet?

Oh, right.

But I have to teach classics, period.
I'm going to look like Mahatma Gandhi to

me.

Now, you listen to me, young lady. There
is such a thing in this world as

consideration. You know, when I was your
age... I know, Dad. You used to sell

newspapers on the corner.

No, that's another story.

When I was... Marion!

That settles it. I am calling a
contractor, and we are going to build a

bathroom. Well, there goes Sweden. You
weren't going anyway.

Well, thank you for your estimate.

And in all fairness, I think I should
tell you that this is the last time you

will ever talk to me.

Weren't you a little rough on him,
Howard? The man is a thief, Marion. He

to charge more for the second bathroom
than I paid for the whole house.

Howard, that was 25 years ago. You could
get a suit for $16.

You still can if you know where to shop.

I don't want to talk about it now. We'll
discuss this when I get back from the

convention.

Try to stay out of jail this time,
Howard.

Marion, that was not my fault. Those
guys stole my clothes, and I had to get

through the lobby.

Dad, I'm glad I caught you. You know
that bathroom you're going to build?

Oh, yeah, well, that's run into a bit of
a snag.

The minimum wage law.

Well, I found a guy that can beat any
price.

Really? Mm -hmm. Well, if he's so cheap,
he can't be very good.

Not very good.

This is a master bathroom builder.

You, Ponzi?

Yeah. You, Howard, huh?

All right, let's get serious. Let's talk
pictures here, Mr. Z.

Well, Arthur, this is so good of you.

Yeah.

Who's that?

Oh, ignore him. Don't worry about it.
So, you want a stall shower? You want a

tub? You want a sink? You want a sink
and a stall shower? What do you want?

you see person to person when they
visited Jane Mansfield?

Who is that?

Nah, don't be in your mind.

I sure did. I saw that. I got the
bathroom just like that. You know, she

everything pink. Everything was heart
-shaped.

Oh, and she had a heated tail bar.

Oh.

Who are they?

Mr. C, don't worry about it. They're
like bees.

You don't hurt them, they don't hurt
you.

Now, look, Fancy, I don't know about
this.

Yeah, okay, so I'm going to level with
you now. I'm going to be a man. I'm

to put it right out straight for you.

Joanie?

Dad, Fonzie has a wonderful idea for a
work -study program for the kids of Pat

and I.

It's called the L .O .D .P.

The L .O .D .P.? Yeah, Learn or Die
Program.

And our bathroom is going to be their
semester project.

Neat, huh? The kids from Pat and I?

Yeah. Oh, I don't think they can build a
bathroom. Oh, Mr. C., let us not

underestimate these kids, you
understand? They have made a machine gun

blender. Yeah.

Mr. C., look.

You're going to help them locate their
self -confidence. Can you dig it? You're

going to help them locate their self
-esteem. Yeah. Well, I appreciate the

offer, Fonzie, but I don't think it's
going to work. Well, then, of course, it

doesn't cost you a dime. On the other
hand, self -esteem is very important.

I'm getting down here. We're going to
thank you. This is a wonderful thing

you're doing, huh? Mr.

C, God bless you.

Everybody, down here, down here. Let's
go.

Thank Mr. C. Do it.

Yeah, uh, look, kids, I just want to...

That's my suit.

Fancy, I don't think this is gonna work.

Don't you understand that one bad egg is
gonna ruin the entire barrel of apples?

Will you talk to the man?

Mr. Cunningham, I wasn't stealing.

It's just that I never had a real man
suit on before, and I wanted to see what

it felt like.

Oh, Dad.

When I was confirmed, My parents bought
me a suit for $14. Where?

I don't want to ruin it for the others,
so I'll just take the suit off and go

home. Oh, hi, Dad.

All right, now look, Fonzie, you'll keep
an eye on all of them, huh? Think of me

as a mother eagle watching her cubs.
Okay,

I'm going to trust you now. All right, I
got to go. I got to catch a plane.

Excuse me.

All right. Hey, what are you, wax fruit?
Get up there. Let's work. Let's work.

Bye,

sweetheart. Goodbye, dear. Bye, Johnny.

$14, huh?

I wonder if I pass that store on the way
to the airport.

Goodbye, dear.

Bye, Danny.

but the plane wouldn't leave the gate
until I took it off.

Oh, well, my darling, how was the
convention?

Oh, it was terrific, sweetheart.

I ran into this guy, Dwight Mesmer, and
he's thinking of placing an order for

487 Whisper Flush toilets. Oh, he must
have a big family.

He owns a hotel, Marion.

Well, I should think he would with a
family that size.

I may be in for a big order when he
comes to dinner next week. You see, I...

want them to hear the sweet silence of
the whisper flush in person.

Marion, don't tell me those kids from
Patton High haven't finished the

yet. Well, Howard, it isn't even a week
yet, dear. Yeah, but the contractor

would have done it by now.

Oh, dear, if you're going up, why don't
you take this up to the kids?

Marion, there's meat on these
sandwiches.

No, yes, dear, it makes it taste better.

You say that you've been making them
sandwiches all week?

Don't be ridiculous, Howard. Yesterday I
took them to a restaurant.

But don't you understand?

Mesmer is coming.

He's got to see the whisper flush in a
finished bathroom.

Marion, when you're selling toilets,
atmosphere is everything.

Hey, that's very good. That's very good.
Thanks, Fonz. Sure, now turn it on.

Fonzie, this place is a mess.

You want to make lemonade, you got to
bust up some lemons.

But you don't understand. This
bathroom's got to be finished by next

There's no problem there, Mr. C. We can
do it by a Wednesday. I didn't say a

Wednesday. I said a next Wednesday.

I have an important customer coming here
to examine the Whisper Flush.

Now, I don't think you understood.

This is a semester project.

These kids are going to take all
semester.

Hey, yo, Pops, could you hold this up
for me? Right here. Look, Fonzie, if you

don't finish the job by the end of the
week, I got to get somebody else.

Wait a minute. You told me for money for
a business proposition, you're going to

sell out my kids. You got it.

Excuse me.

I have gone about as far as I can with
you on this, Fonzie.

You guys are fired.

Uh, hold it, Mr. C. You cannot fire
that. This is schoolwork.

Excuse me. You're expelled. Now get out
of my house. All right, everybody wait

for me in the hallway. Let's go. Come
on, Lee.

Mr. C., you cannot do this to me. Don't
you understand? If we do this, these

kids won't trust anybody anymore.

Oh, talking about trust, Fonzie, when
you asked me for this job, you didn't

anything about taking all semester to do
it. Au contraire.

As a matter of fact, Joanie said...

It's going to take a semester.

And when you heard the word cheat, you
didn't care if canaries did this.

I am not going to stand here and let you
call me cheat. All right, where do you

want to go?

Fonzie, there's an old saying.

Friends should never do business
together.

Well, that's great, because right now we
are neither.

Howard, what did you say to Arthur and
the boys to make them so mad?

One of them mooned me on the way out.

I fired them, Marion.

Well, how are we going to get the
bathroom finished?

I'm going to do it myself.

Yourself?

You're gonna turn this bathroom into a
real show place here. Yeah. How you

doing, Johnny?

She still looks great.

Did you come over here to ogle my
daughter, or have you got something else

mind? You mean I get a choice? No.

Well, in that case, I got something on
my mind.

Mr. Cunningham finds he's really down.

You know, he says you're his second
father to turn his back on him.

Oh, boy, give me a break, huh?

Look, tell Fonzie I'll be glad to make
up with him. I'm big enough to accept

apology. Look at Fonzie's words exactly.

He seems to see you guys think alike.
You belong together.

Just like Liz and Dick.

Like Simon and Schuster.

Like Rocky and Bullwinkle. Now, I happen
to have a very important client

coming here, and this bathroom has got
to be finished by tomorrow night.

Not that I don't appreciate your coming
over here to irritate me. Anytime.

No, no, I'd say you did a pretty good
job here. Oh, thank you. My head is

spinning with praise.

I can't figure out how to still her
open.

Huh.

It doubles as a desk, right?

I'll fix it.

Hey, is that the whisper flush?

Water is boiling.

I bet you can make spaghetti in this
thing.

Look, you build your bathroom your way
and I'll do it mine.

Mr. Cunningham, you're in big trouble
here. Can I give you some advice,

Can you call a contractor?

Call a plumber.

I got an idea. Call Fonzie.

I got a better idea.

What's that?

Why don't half the people who are here
now be here now?

I guess you'll have to go back to
whistling again.

Now the water's off in the other
bathroom.

I can fix it, Marie. Well, Fonzie can
fix it, darling. Fonzie can fix it.

can fix it. Can Fonzie do this?

Mr. Mesmer, I've been upstairs for a
long time. I hope everything's okay.

Oh, everything's all right. You know, I
really have to hand it to your father.

The bathroom looks great. It does. And
it was finished just in time.

It's so exciting having two baths. Makes
me feel Japanese.

How about that, huh, Mr. Mesmer?

Didn't I tell you that that whisper
flush was quiet?

Cunningham, I have to admit, even with
my head in the bowl, I couldn't hear a

thing.

My hair dry yet?

Well, everybody sit down. Dinner's
ready.

I hope you like this. This recipe has
been in our family for generations.

Oh, I was hoping for something fresh.

How about that? He's got 500 rooms in a
hotel in a sense he over.

All right, so, uh, this is the toaster
you want me to fix, huh?

I thought this was Lodge Night. I didn't
know you were going to be here. I

thought you were going to growl at
somebody.

I'm entertaining a business associate,
Fonzie. This is Mr.

Mesmer, Mr.

Fonzarello. Oh, don't get up, don't get
up. I'm just a tenant here.

Boy, you lucky, huh? This woman spreads
out a great table.

Used to be my seat.

I'm only going to fix your side.

I was saying, Mr. Mesmer, I'm sure that
you're going to find that the Whisper

Flush is quiet, efficient... Cutting
him, cutting him, please. Cut the sales

pitch. I'm sold.

Oh, it worked great. I just happened to
have the contract right here.

And I'll tell you something, Mr. Mesmer.
You can certainly expect prompt

delivery. You see, when you buy a toilet
from Cunningham Hardware, you're not

only... You're not only getting the
toilet, but you're getting the man

behind the toilet.

Cunningham, what's going on here? Oh,
it's probably nothing. You see, this is

old house. It's just the humidity.

Now, if you'll just sign right here.

And if you would be kind enough to
initial right... Cunningham.

Your whisper flush should make a noise
so that some people can get a warning.

Don't do that!

Oh, and Cunningham, another thing.

Don't even think about staying in one of
my hotels.

I can fix it, Marion.

Hey, Mr. C.

You wanted to... This won't take long. I
just need

to talk to you.

Oh, uh... I don't want to be picky or
anything, but your medicine cabinet's

crooked.

Howard wanted me to ask you if you could
get your students back to fix our

bathroom.

What is he, a ventriloquist?

I'd love to see his lips move.

Oh.

Fonzie, if you ask the students to come
back and finish the bathroom, I'll...

Spit it out. I'll pay him.

You will pay them?

All right, all right. I know I have a
reputation for being a little frugal,

you've got to understand that people my
age, they grew up in the Great

Depression, and times were tough.

Guys would sell apples on street
corners, and okay, I'm cheap.

I want to tell you something. It takes a
very big man to admit that, Mr. C.

I'm sorry, Fonzie. I should never have
put business above friendship. I let

those kids down.

No, it wasn't, you know, just your
fault.

I should apologize, you know, for, um...
Well, for, um...

Yeah, I think this one is your fault.

Yeah, well, I guess I let... My
frugality got out of hand, but, uh...

I'm going to change.

Does that mean we can get a dishwasher?

No, but it means you can start using hot
water, ma 'am. Oh, how.

A shortcake.

Oh, hey.

If you haven't seen 24 from the
beginning, you don't know Jack.

Jack Bauer, that is. Keeper Sutherland
stars in the critically acclaimed 24

every Sunday at 8 Eastern on
Superstation WGN. See it from the very

minute.