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There's a time for love and a time for living. Take a chance and face the wind.
Open road and a road that's hidden. Brand new life around the bend.
There were times I lost a dream or two.
Found a trail and at the end was you.
There's a path you take and a path not taken.
The choice is up to you, my friend.
Not so long, but you might awaken to a brand new life. A brand new life. A
new life.
Hey,
hey, hey, look what I got, Jonathan, huh?
What the world needs now is gloves, sweet gloves.
It looks a little old in you. That's right, Angel. I broke it in good. You
I oiled it, I strapped a ball in it, and I put it under my spare tire for three
whole days.
Thank God you didn't get him a puppy.
Hey, everybody. Mr. Lucky's home.
Hey. Looks like Mr. Lucky's going to end up with Mr. Hernia.
What do you got there?
Why Mr.
Lucky? Mr. Lucky because...
I have probably the finest musical instrument on earth.
Funny. That looks like an accordion.
It is. I had to get to music class real early so no one else would get it.
Isn't she a beaut?
Yeah. Makes me want to polka my brains out.
Honey, I didn't know you liked the accordion so much. Oh. Oh, big fan. Big,
fan. Yeah, yeah. Well, me too, Jonathan. You know, you can play all sorts of
neat songs on this. Like, Lady of Spain, I adore you.
When I was in Barcelona, Carlos used to sing me that song.
Who would have thought he'd become king?
Mother, the only king you ever dated was Leon Gold, the bedspread king.
I'm just dying to jump on this baby. Good night, buddy. Hit it hard. Hit it
hard. You know, Tony, maybe someday Jonathan and I could play a concert
together. He on the accordion, me on my cello. This house is not big enough.
Well, my day was a total embarrassment. How was yours? Well, what happened? What
happened? Jonathan got stuck with the accordion, and everybody at school made
fun of him. He was so upset, he threw up on the music teacher.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, my baby. He's always had a nervous stomach. I better go talk to him. Take
apron.
Wait for me. Wait for me. This will cheer him up. I'll give him the glove.
thinking. Oh, poor little fella. I feel sorry for him. Well, mother, do you want
to come with us?
No. Too depressing.
Can we come in?
Phew, this sucker's big. But then there's all the more to love.
Sweetheart. You don't need to do this. We know what happened in school today.
Everything? Yeah, can I get you an antacid?
I hate this thing. It's totally uncool.
Well, hey, Jonathan, you know what's cool?
I'll tell you what's cool.
Baseball's cool, huh?
I got caught from the team.
Well, baseball's not that cool, you know.
Well, honey, I'm sure a lot of kids got caught.
No, I was the only one.
But then I went to try out for the band, and look what I got stuck with.
Sweetheart, you know, there's more to life than sports and music and
by your peers and feeling good about yourself.
There's, uh, a mother's love.
But, Mom, I want to belong. I mean, I've got to belong to something besides you.
Well, hey, Jonathan, look, you want to be in that band?
Then we make that accordion thing work.
I mean, hey, you got lemons, you make lemonade. That's right, Tony.
And you know what else?
Sometimes you might even find a little lump of sugar on the bottom of the
Yeah, yeah, sure, sure.
Listen, I got a buddy, my best friend, Bobby Guvanelli. You heard me talk about
him. He plays the accordion, too. And let me tell you something. When we were
young, all the kids made fun of him. But because Bobby was always practicing and
squeezing that accordion, he built his biceps up as hard as baseballs. And you
know what that did for him?
It made him feel better about himself.
Yeah, that's true. It made him feel better about himself, but it also got
guys to stop laughing and appreciate the accordion more right after he beat the
hell out of them.
Oh, forget it. I'm a loser.
Oh, John.
Sweetheart, you are special.
Sell it to someone else.
I'd like to be alone now.
All right, okay.
Hey, hey, kid, for what it's worth, I think you're a hell of a baseball
There you go.
What a day that kid had. My poor baby.
I'm not a baby.
Move down the hall. Thank you.
You think there's a sport that requires great hearing?
No, I already...
I can't stand to see him hurting like this. Don't worry about a thing, Angela.
You know, a kid his age, he needs a guy's influence, and I'm just the guy
the job, you know? I'm going to start an all -out campaign to build up his
confidence. When I'm through with him, he's going to have a sport he's great
He'll have friends coming out of his ears, and he'll play that accordion
brilliantly.
Well, two out of three. Come on.
And then when you get your opponent laughing like that, you take them down.
Oh, hey, Jonathan, I've been thinking. I know how much you like the races.
Yeah, I like them a lot.
All right, buddy, so what do you say Sunday, Jonathan and Tony, at Lime Rock
Raceway, Sunday, where the cars meet the stars and your tires are on fire and it
treads on your head, room, be there.
Really? That'd be great.
Hey, is that your watch? Your old watch under the couch trick. I should have
seen it coming.
Oh, you're lightning fast.
You got the reflexes of a puma.
Hey, it's all in the hearing.
All right.
Oh, I'll get that.
Hey,
it's my man Bobby.
My friend Tony.
Ooh,
you really should have that thing lanced.
This is Bobby Groovy Gooby Goobanelli. Hey, nice house.
You like it, huh?
Are you here from Wino? You kidding me? He was over at my house again for
dinner. Nothing changes. Don't give him my address.
Oh, it's good to see you, buddy.
Jonathan, you want to be great in that school band?
You want to have arms that'll rip the seams right out of your shirt? Then let
this man here, let this man teach you how to play the squeeze box.
Bobby, please, tickle those ivories for us.
Thank you.
Oh, that's great, Bobby. That's great.
How does that make you feel? Doesn't that make you just want to play that
accordion? What do you think?
Wow, can you teach me to play like that?
Are you kidding, kid? With hands like yours, you're a natural.
Hey, before you know it, you'll be a star on one of my recitals. Hey, did you
hear that, huh? Hey, Bobby, Bobby, you can teach him my favorite. A lady of
Spain, I had told you not to.
No,
not for nothing, Tony, but I hate that song.
It's giving the accordion a bad rap from day one. I refuse to play it or teach
it. Well, Bobby, you know, you're missing out on a real crowd -pleaser
It's a showstopper. You know, I've seen it stop shows.
Are you okay? Who's making that god -awfully wonderful sound on
my favorite instrument?
Bobby Guvanelli, Mona Robinson.
Oh, you like the accordion?
Like it.
Like it. Every time I hear it, I feel like slipping into my lace and silk
lederhosen.
Mona celebrates the Oktoberfest all year long.
Well, I gotta be going. Mona, it was a pleasure to meet you.
Tony, see you later. Okay, buddy. And you, I'll see you tomorrow.
Hey, great hands.
He gets them from me.
Bob, could you drop me off at the Pulaski home? I want to pick up my
All right, Bob, see you tomorrow, and watch yourself.
Did I handle it? Did I get the guy for you or what, huh?
Okay, where were we? Hey, watch it. You heard Bobby the hand. Okay, no hands.
Body slam.
Hello. My name is Angela Bauer, and I'm having a small recital in my home on
Tuesday night, and I need to rent 20 chairs.
My son, Jonathan, is making his debut.
The accordion.
Yes, I'm serious.
He's only been taking lessons for two weeks, but he's very, very good.
He's also quite an athlete. He just got a new glove, you know.
I'm sorry.
I'm Mrs. Bauer's nurse.
That will be 6 o 'clock at
3344 Oak Hills Drive.
Thank you. Goodbye.
Lime Rock Raceway, here we come.
Doo -dah, doo -dah. Oh, Tony, Jonathan's going to be so excited. He thought
today's race was sold out.
It was, it was, but when I got to that ticket booth, I turned on the old street
smarts. You pushed, you hustled. I cried.
It worked, too. It worked because the ticket girl felt bad for me. She gave me
her seats.
Tony, you are the sweetest, most wonderful man in the whole world.
Talk is cheap.
How about a little action, huh?
Yeah, how about a little action, huh?
Hello,
Bobby, I was just about to call you.
Everything's all set for the recital. That's great.
Angela, thanks again for letting us use your house for the recital. You bet.
Hey, Tony, Bobby, what's happening? Hey, hey, hey, nice suit. Who died?
You, if you keep on insulting my clothes... Hey,
Bobby!
Johnny!
Hey,
how's the school band going?
Oh, great. I'm getting a solo in Abraham, Martin, and John.
You are? You didn't tell me that.
Oh, sorry. I forgot.
Well, hey, Bobby, what are you doing here? You guys ain't got another lesson
today, do you?
Now, I got this gig over in Hartford. I'm doing a big bar mitzvah, and I
my main man, Johnny, would like to come and see me play.
Really? That'd be great.
Let's go.
Sweetheart, Tony just got tickets for the races, and he went to a lot of
trouble. At Lime Rock? Yeah, yeah. Hey, we'll have a blast. You know, the roar
of the engines, the smell of the pit crew.
Oh, well, hey, hey, Jonathan, if you'd rather go to the bar mitzvah, it's okay
with me.
Hey, thanks, Tony. Come on.
Tony, are you okay with that?
Oh, sure, of course, Bob. Hey, hey, car races happen every day. A bar mitzvah
happens once every 13 years.
Have a nagila.
Dad, are you still upset about Jonathan dumping you to go to the bar mitzvah
with Bobby? I am not upset about him dumping me. I mean, I want the kid to
new friends and be exposed to other religions and eat gefilte fish.
Anyway. Anyway, it's what I've been saying all along. The kid needs to be
well -rounded.
Hey, everybody.
Hey,
guys. So, did you guys have fun?
Oh, yeah. This girl Debbie slipped me her number on a matchbook cover. What
I say?
Chicks love musicians.
All right. Hey, Bobby, can I speak to you in the kitchen, please? Sure.
Be back in a minute, lady killer.
Oh, lady killer.
Lady killer.
Hey,
Bobby, great job with Jonathan. You know, he's been squeezing that accordion
much, before you know it, he'll be beating up them kids that were making
him. Hey, that's important to a kid. Yeah, and you should know.
But anyway, look, Bob, I got a little problem.
You see, I had this plan to sort of build up his confidence in a lot of
different areas, but now all he's doing is spending his time on that accordion.
Yeah, but Tony, he's got to practice. He's got an important recital coming up.
Yeah, I know about the recital, and that's what I was thinking. You know,
after the recital, we could cut back on his lessons.
Cut back on his lessons?
Cut back on my lessons? You can't do that.
You know, Jonathan, this has nothing to do with you being well -rounded.
It's that old accordion bigotry rearing its ugly head.
Accordion bigotry? That's ridiculous.
Then how come you used to make fun of me when I was a kid?
Bobby, I was eight years old. I made fun of everybody. I called everybody names,
remember? I used to call the triangle player a square.
Come on, admit it, Tony. You thought all accordion players were jerks. Bobby, I
did not. Admit it.
I did not. Come on, admit it. All right, fine.
I thought all accordion players were jerks, okay?
So you think I'm a jerk because I play the accordion?
No, Jonathan, that's not what I meant. I mean, when I was a kid.
And anyway, that was before I heard Lady of Spain played on it, you know?
You know, Jonathan, that's an accordion bigger.
He's sweet to your face, but behind your back he's saying, we don't want them
living next door. We don't want that kind marrying our daughter.
Is that true, Tony?
Of course not. Don't listen to this nut job.
What, are you kidding me? Hey, you want to propose to Sam? You got my blessing.
Too little, too late. Look, don't bother. And don't bother coming to the
either. I don't want you anywhere near us. Oh, wait a minute, Jonathan.
Well, well, well.
An accordion play living under your very own roof. There's a certain twist of
justice to that.
And if you call right now, you can get everybody's favorite, the two -bat
Can I talk to you for a minute?
Heard you got angry at Tony.
Well, he lied to me. He told me he liked the accordion, but he really doesn't.
He's just another closet accordion bigot.
No, he's not.
Then why did you want me to cut back on my lessons? Because he doesn't want you
to limit yourself.
Let's face it, honey, not many boys your age have a complete collection of
Lawrence Welk records.
Oh, now you hate the accordion, too.
Bobby was right. This society will never accept us.
Jonathan, I love the accordion, and Tony loves the accordion, but more
importantly, Tony loves you.
Do you know how much it hurt him when you said you didn't want him to come to
your recital?
I hope as much as it hurt when he made fun of my accordion.
Oh, sweetheart.
Oh, I'm sorry you're hurt.
But you've got to remember that Tony was the one who brought Bobby here in the
first place because he wants to make you happy.
Now that you're spending so much time with Bobby, I think Tony kind of misses
you.
I have to practice, if you don't mind.
I think this is terrific.
I think this is okay.
I think we've died and gone to music hell.
Jonathan's on next.
Sam, he doesn't want me in there.
Sure he does. No, he doesn't, Sam. Our relationship has deteriorated to good
morning, good evening, and please pass the gavilta fish.
You're really hurt, aren't you?
No, Sam, I'm not hurt. I'm stupid.
I should have expected this.
I mean, you teach a kid everything you know about being a guy, and then he bars
you from his accordion recital. It's the same old story.
Dad, as a former kid...
Let me just tell you.
Sometimes kids say things they don't mean. Or they mean things they don't
Or they say things they mean, but then they take it back because they realize
was really too mean.
What do you mean?
This is a big day for Jonathan.
And even though he may not admit it, I think he wants you out there. Sam, he
doesn't.
Thank you, amethyst.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, a special treat. I am honored and proud to
present my friend, my student, my main man, Mr. Johnny B.
Ladies and gentlemen, I can't continue with this song. See, Sam, I told you I
shouldn't have come in here.
I'd like to try something a little different.
This is for my main man.
Oh, his main man.
Could anything be nerdier than this?
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