Original subtitles

There's a time for love and a time for living. Take a chance and face the

An open road and a road that's hidden. A brand new life around the bend.

There were times I lost a dream or two.

And found a trail.

And at the end was you.

There's a path you take and a path not taken.

The choice is up to you, my friend.

Not so long, but you're not awakened to a brand new life. Brand new life. A

brand new life for Dr.

Dean.

Jonathan.

Jonathan. Who taught you to break eggs like that?

Mom.

Wow, that is her style, except you got it in the bowl.

Good morning. Oh, good morning, Angela. How about some breakfast? A little

coffee, juice, eggshells?

I'd love to. It says Jeffrey will be here any minute. Is the garage clean?

Oh, Angela, why don't you let him in the living room?

He's leaving his car with us while he goes to Boston. You know how he is about

his thing.

Obsessive? No, of course not.

It's just that his garage is being painted and he's afraid that the fumes

ruin the car's high -gloss finish.

Obsessive.

Who's the doofus tooting his horn?

That is not a doofus, that is Jeffrey.

But it's so easy to mix them up.

Heavenly stars!

Holy mackerel, look what just landed!

where you bought a new car.

Oh, no, no, Angel, not a car.

This is a perfect synthesis of technology and craftsmanship.

No fingerprints, please.

Whatever made you buy this perfect synthesis?

My id told me to. Then my therapist backed me up and we had my accountant

outnumbered. You realize that this baby can do 157 miles per?

Ooh, that'll come in real handy in Midtown Manhattan.

Jeffrey. Great wheels.

Why, thank you, Mona. They cost me $4 ,000 extra.

How much was your hat?

Got him to throw it in.

Oh, boy, you're a vicious negotiator there, Jeffrey. That's what they told

Silent. No, no, honey, don't do that. Don't do that.

Oh, pinch me. I must be dreaming a car telephone.

With voice -activated dialing. Oh, can I live in here? No, but you can visit.

Busy hours are up.

Jeffrey, I don't want you to worry. I'm going to take very good care of your

car. Oh, no, no, Angel. Not my car.

I want you to think of this as our car.

Oh, Jeff.

You mean I can drive it? Well, of course you can drive it.

You do know how to use a stick, don't you? Oh, yeah. Don't worry about a thing

there, Jeff. What are you kidding me? You know...

I let her use my van all the time, and she's very responsible.

She paid for the new transmission.

All right, Super Bowl fans.

Get your red hot quiche, your fresh pate, your room temperature brie.

For football?

Dad, that's wimp food.

Well, I know it, I know it, but Angela only watches one game a year, and I want

to make it special for her.

C 'est magnifique, eh?

Mmm.

Mmm, what do you mean, mmm? What's the matter?

What is it? Is the brie too runny? The pate too foie?

No, just foie enough.

Well, then what's the matter, Angela? What's missing?

Since you asked, nachos, hot dogs, barbecue chips, pork rinds, I want to

out with the rest of the country.

You're a great American there, Angela. Hey, I'm going to go get us some real

star food. Oh, Dad, you're going to miss the kickoff.

It's all right. I'll go. All kickoffs look alike to me.

I'll take Jeffrey's Porsche.

Angela?

Angela, no.

Tony, it's just a car.

She's just kidding, Jeff.

No, no, I'm serious, Angela. Wait a minute.

Now, wait a minute. Don't gun that engine. And don't ride that clutch.

And most important, don't forget the cheese doodles.

You like cheese doodles? You've got to have them. Super Bowl?

Oh, what a catch. What a tush.

Hey, hey, look who's back.

Got some bad news.

I know it. Did I say it? I said it.

You creamed Jeffrey's car?

No, the stores were out of foot -long hot dogs. I had to settle for cocktail

franks.

That's all right, Angel. We'll put a couple of them together. The buns will

never know the difference.

Okay, so how did Jeffrey's car drive?

Perfection. Pure exhilaration.

I went from zero to 15 in eight seconds flat.

I hope you didn't get whiplash.

Oh, Mother, by the way, your car is blocking the driveway and I can't get

Jeffrey's car back into the garage.

So... Well, it's out there totally exposed to the elements.

Oh, no.

And it's turbo flu season.

Hello. Oh!

Oh, hi, Jeffrey.

Ah, you missed her, huh?

That's sweet.

Oh, he's so romantic.

Oh, Angela's here, too. Hang on a second.

Hello.

Oh, my, Jeffrey, the things you say.

Um, I think I'm going to take this upstairs.

Okay, hold on. Tony, would you please put Jeffrey's car into the garage? Yes,

okay. Oh, okay, look.

Hey, don't blitz, pass, or fumble till I get back.

Here comes the blitz. Oh, go blitz. But he made the play. Yay, complete.

It's complete.

Yeah. Oh, wait.

He fumbled.

Oh, blitz.

He recovered.

Oh, good. I knew we could count. Oh, what a play.

God's gonna die.

Hey, hey, hey, what'd I miss?

Nothing. Oh.

I need the keys to your car.

Catch.

Oh, oh, oh. Hey, six points, huh? Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it,

hold it.

Oh,

wait, wait, they're back. They're going for the box.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Good dance.

But not as good as yours, Tony.

Hey, look, keep me posted.

Wait, Dad, there's a flag on the flag. There's a what? There's a flag? How

there be a flag?

still parked on the street? Well, I had to leave it there until I backed Mona's

out. Well, I just don't want any sawdust from the wheeler's tree to get on it

and scratch the finish.

Angela, would you stop worrying about that car?

Really?

That's a big scratch.

I just can't believe this. I mean, who would have thought a car that cost so

much could be so squishy?

Yeah, it'd look like a pancake, only flatter.

I got it. I got it. Look, we sit Jeffrey down, right? We give him some white

wine, a few pork rinds, all right? Then we calmly tell him that terrorists, they

stormed the house, they tied us up, and they took his car.

Will you relax?

You don't know Jeffrey the way I do. He's a man of reason.

He's going to understand that this is just a material object, and sometimes

these unfortunate mishaps happen.

Well, you are absolutely right, dear.

Well, I'm out of here.

Jeffrey!

Angela!

Hello, Jeffrey. How was Beantown? Wonderful.

Everything's coming up roses.

Keep that thought, Josh.

I've got something to tell you. Jeffrey, I have something to tell you, too.

You're not going to believe it. You're not going to believe it, either. Me

first. The Phillips deal went through.

Your car got totaled.

We thought you might want this.

Oh, my God, you're serious.

Well, you know, you should be proud of this steering wheel. Not many steering

wheels could have held up like this one.

Where's the rest of it? The remains are on view at Acme Salvage.

Angela, are you all right?

I thank my lucky stars you weren't hurt. How in the world did you walk away

without a scratch?

Oh, Jeffrey, why don't you have a seat over here? You know, you're a man of

reason, and I think you're going to find this story very...

Reasonable. It all started with the Super Bowl and the pate.

Only, I wanted football food, and so I took your car because you said to think

of it as ours.

I see, I see. Well, they say that most accidents occur within ten miles of the

home, sometimes even closer.

And when I got back to the house, Mother's car was parked in the driveway,

had to park your car behind it.

You parked my car in the driveway? In the shade.

And everything would have been fine, except that the wheelers were cutting

their tree.

And to make a very long story short, we've got a great lawsuit.

I'm sorry.

Sorry won't bring back my baby.

Jeffrey, I know that this is difficult for you, but there's no need to

overreact. No one was hurt. You're fully insured. Yeah, hey, Jeffrey, you can

get a new Porsche tomorrow. I don't want a new Porsche. I want my Porsche.

Don't you think you're being a little childish?

Oh, first you thought of my car, and now you're calling me names? You know what

you are? You are irresponsible.

Irresponsible? How dare you? You care more about that stupid car than you do

about me? Uh -huh. I knew it all along. You were always jealous of her.

So now I'm crazy? Now, now, now, wait a second, Jeff. Hold on here. Look, I

don't mean to butt in, but... Tony, then don't. Please, I can handle this. Now,

wait a minute, Louisa. This isn't your fault. Now, look, Jeffrey, I parked the

car on the street, so if you're going to blame anybody, blame me.

You let somebody else drive my Porsche?

Just a few feet.

I see it all clearly now. You don't understand me at all.

I think you're right about that.

Well, if that's your attitude, then I think it's best if we dissolve this

relationship. Fine.

Don't you worry, Angela.

He'll be back.

Well, I didn't say he'd stay.

Jeffrey, is that you?

Gee, you look like you haven't eaten or slept or showered.

I need to talk to you.

Sure, come on in. Hey, can I get you a cup of coffee, a glass of juice, some

airwick?

No, no, nothing.

I'm too tortured.

Tony, you're looking at a desperate man.

Have you considered a BMW?

Tony, what have I done?

You don't know how special... Angela is. You can't imagine what it's like being

crazy about her.

Well, you know, I got a good imagination there, Jeffrey.

I mean, she's everything that I've ever wanted. She's everything I've ever

dreamed about. I can't lose her.

Oh,

Angel. I'm so sorry.

Jeffrey,

get a hold of yourself here. Come on, will you? You're leaving nose prints on

the picture.

Put your hand...

Wouldn't it be better to just apologize in person? Oh, sure, I can see it now. I

show up at her door, she slams it in my face. I send her candy, flowers, a

bracelet from Cartier. She won't accept my apology. I don't eat, I don't sleep,

I neglect my clients. They drop me, I lose everything.

I end up at a shelter eating pea soup.

Sometimes they put those little croutons in it.

You know, Tony, I always felt that we had the start of a

little friendship.

Am I right?

Yeah, I guess.

Well, I need you.

I'd really like to help out, little friend. But I really don't know what I

do. Talk to Angela.

Tell her not to slam the door in my face. She'll listen. She thinks the

you. Now, now, hold on here, Jeffrey. Why should I? I mean, you heard Angela.

And what's to say you won't do it again? I won't. I swear. Tony, all I want... I

just want Angela to be happy. If you can honestly tell me that Angela is happy

without me, I will crawl out this door and never come back.

Never?

Anthony, don't listen to him. You know she's not happy.

Oh, hey.

Hey, Mo.

Don't be a chump.

You don't want that jerk hanging around, do you?

She's not happy.

Happy. Not happy.

Not happy. Happy. Not happy. Happy.

I'm right already.

Huh?

Jeffrey, she's... She's not happy.

Tony, you're an angel.

You'll talk to her? Please?

Please? Please, I'm prepared to beg.

You're way past begging. You're already a groveler.

Just one thing.

Anything. Get a shave. Your beard's giving me a rash.

One of those shelves to paper?

I've been wanting to alphabetize these for the longest time.

Aristophany, Aristotle, Boswell, Browning... Where's the Jackie Collins?

In the bathroom.

Pass me the Chaucer, please. Sure.

Oh, what a coincidence.

Chaucer's first name is Jeffrey with a G.

Think about him much?

Not since my senior thesis.

I don't mean that, Jeffrey. I mean the one that doesn't speak in Middle

That Jeffrey is history also.

My past is over. My future is now.

Pass me the Play -Doh, please.

Angela, let me ask you a question.

Let's say you're walking down Fifth Avenue and you run into Jeffrey. Would

say hello?

Probably not.

Well, let's say you were walking down Madison Avenue and you accidentally bump

into him. Would you say excuse me? I don't think so.

Well, how about Lexington Avenue?

All right, you're walking down Lex and you look up and you spot Jeffrey about

floors up ready to take the big plunge.

Would you at least say don't jump?

What floor did you say that was?

Hey,

I guess so.

All right, now then, wait a minute. Come here.

What?

Pretend you're on Lincolnton Avenue.

Don't jump.

Come on.

Now, Angela, come on. The least you can do is listen to what the poor slob has

to say. I mean, he's showered and everything.

I'll try and catch up to him.

Did I see Jeffrey waiting at the front door?

Or was it a nightmare?

It was Jeffrey.

Oh, no. The return of the living dud.

They're out there right now kissing each other on the nose.

Damn, I hate that.

I kind of arranged it, Mona. What? That is just like you. Selfie, selfie,

selfish. You never once considered my feelings.

Wait a minute, Mona. We're talking about Angela here, and she was miserable. And

besides, this Jeffrey, did he beg me? Oh, it was terrible, Mona. You know,

there's nothing more pathetic than a yuppie on the skids.

Jeffrey, forget it. Angela, I won't hear of it. Jeffrey, why are you always so

stubborn? Angela, please.

Hey, hey, I think they're fighting.

Oh. mother's dream.

I've made up my mind that it's final.

Angela!

You know, I mean, it's too bad that they couldn't work things out, but hey, I

gave it my best shot.

I better get in there and break it up before it gets ugly. No, wait.

Let it get ugly.

Angela, sweetheart, there is nothing left to discuss.

I am paying the deductible.

Has anyone ever told you that you're beautiful when you're insistent?

You know, I realized something while we were apart, Angela.

I love you.

What are you doing?

Piddling.

Where's Jeffrey?

He's warming up the Jags. We're going out for a celebration.

Oh, well, that's nice.

If it hadn't been for you, Jeffrey and I wouldn't have gotten back together.

So I just wanted to say thank you.

Oh, hey, as long as you're happy.

You are happy, aren't you?

Yes.

Well, that's good, because, hey, you deserve to be with the right guy.

Whoever he is.

Hey, look, I guess you got a celebration to get to, huh? And I better get a vase

for these beautiful roses. Boy, they are gorgeous.

Too bad they're not pink, huh?

Tony, how did you know that pink roses are my favorite?

You mentioned it once.

What are you kids up to tonight?

Nothing much, just dinner and a Broadway show.

And then we're off for a weekend in the country.

What do you have lined up?

Oh, well, I'm going to curl up with a good book, either Chaucer or Jackie

Collins.

Have a good time.

You too.

Thanks, Tony.

You're a real pal.

Thanks, Tony.

You're a real pal.

You know what you are?

You're a fool.

Oh, yeah?

Go ahead, tell them. Tell them what?

You blew it, you big chump.

Stay tuned for an episode of The Cosby Show featuring Rudy at her most

No, wait, it's Olivia at her most adorable.

Okay, so we don't know exactly which episode is next, but someone in it is

to be at their most adorable.

So keep watching.