Original subtitles

There's more to life than what you're living. Take a chance and face the wind.

Open road and a road that's hidden. Brand new life around the bend.

There were times I lost a dream or two.

Found a trail and at the end was you.

There's a path we're taking and a path not taking. The choice is up to you, my

friend. Nights are long, but you might awake to a brand new life, brand new

life, brand new life around the bend.

Thank you.

Thank you very much. Very good job.

Now, did you clean behind the refrigerator?

Check. Did you buff the floors in the closets? Check.

Did you clean the bugs out of the light fixture in the garage?

Check. Is there anything I've forgotten?

The check?

Just wanted to make sure everything's thick and thin.

Yeah, who you got coming over? Tony Randall? Oh, no.

Actually, my housekeeper's coming back from vacation.

Oh. How nice for you.

No, no,

no. It's really nice for him. You see, he and his daughter have driven down the

coast to Florida.

And, you know, it's so beautiful there this time of year. And she really is a

darling. And he's, well...

Well, actually, he really deserves a vacation.

A vacation.

Do you and the table want to be alone?

Hi, Mother.

I just, uh, cleaners missed a spot.

And, uh, you know, Tony, I want to give him the satisfaction of walking in here

and saying, Oh, this place looks like a grease pit.

Hooray, hooray, hooray, my baby. Hi. Oh, I'm so glad to see you. Um, where's

Tony? He's unloading the van.

Great to be back.

How was Florida?

What did you do?

Did you go where the boys are? I wanted to, but guess where Dad wanted to go?

Oh,

I missed you, you big lump. Oh, I missed you too, Mona. Every moment away from

you was like an eternity.

Oh, hi, Angela.

You look so...

So, I don't have to say you look so -so, but the three weeks hasn't aged you a

bit. Oh, thank you. I stayed out of the sun.

It worked.

Hey,

this place looks like a grease pit.

What?

Allow me. I haven't done this in so long.

Bauer residence, Tony speaking.

She certainly is, in all her glory.

It's for you, Angela.

It's Jonathan's counselor at his camp. Oh, thank you. Hello?

Oh, yes, Mr. Wormser.

Oh?

Oh?

Oh, no.

Yes. Yes. Yeah, well, I'll see you tomorrow, then.

Thanks very much. Bye -bye.

Something wrong?

No, he just wanted to make sure that I would be up there for parents weekend,

and I may have to bring Jonathan back with me. What's the matter?

No problem. What? Has he got poison ivy? Did he break his leg? Is he

constipated?

What is wrong with my grandson?

He misses his mommy.

Why?

Mother, the child is homesick. He misses Tony, he misses Sam, he misses you and

the snake.

Well, at least I got billing over the snake.

Angela, when you go up to visit him, why not bring something along to cheer him

up? Well, actually, I have baked him some cookies.

Angela, the kid feels bad enough. Come on.

No, I'm serious. Why don't you bring something to really cheer him up? Like

what? Like us.

No, we are not almost there.

And no. We're not going to eat until we get to our picnic spot.

And if you want to go to the bathroom, you should have gone before we left the

house. I didn't have to go before we left the house.

I'm bored.

Oh, I know.

Why don't we sing camp songs?

No, come on.

Come on, it will be fun.

Oh, do you remember this one?

Kumbaya, my lord.

Kumbaya.

Kumbaya.

What? Are you kidding me? If we're going to sing songs, let's sing a good one.

And there was Lonnie swinging on the outhouse door without the nightie. All

guys were asking for more. And there was Mona swinging on the outhouse door and

living color.

All the guys were asking for more.

I'm sure I didn't learn that song at camp. Heck, I didn't. And if you'd have

sent Jonathan to my camp, he'd be having a blast.

Dad, you went to camp?

Yeah. I sold the most subscriptions to Popular Mechanics. I had a great pitch.

I'd just say, hey, my name's Tony Maselli. Would you like to buy a

me and send me to camp? Or would you rather I spend the summer on the streets

with my buddies near your car?

Where'd you go? I went to a Y camp right up near Jonathan's.

to jonathan's camp when i was a kid there was a white camp right across the

when were you there i don't know 64 65 oh i'm sure i was there then wasn't i

mother you went there from 63 to 66 the greatest summers of my life wait a

minute wait a minute i think i remember that place uh that was camp stuck up

wasn't it yeah all the girls had their noses in the air

You were one of those rowdies who used to steal our underwear and run it up the

flagpole, huh?

We always saluted.

This is incredible.

Angela, maybe you two knew each other.

No.

Because those girls wouldn't give us the time of day, Mona.

That's not exactly true.

I mean, even though those boys were from the wrong side of the lake, there was

something illicit and intriguing about them.

Sometimes we used to...

See, you know.

Oh, you mean the... Yeah.

What? What, what, what, what?

I had my first grown -up kiss with one of those boys.

Tell us about it, Angela.

Oh, it's all right.

It was just one small, insignificant moment in my life nobody really wants to

hear. You're probably right, dear.

No, no, no. I want to hear about this prim camper by day, teenage temptress by

night.

Well, it was sweet, and it was wonderful, and it was magic.

There was this place that was right by the lake, and it was called Kissing

And if a girl met a boy that she liked, she slipped away from camp.

And that's what I did one moon -drenched night.

I hurried to my rendezvous.

I glided across the forest.

I felt at one with the creatures of the night.

Finally, the woods gave way to a clearing.

And there he was, my knight in shining moccasins.

And at that moment, I knew I was a woman.

My face was aglow with expectation.

Are you sure it wasn't clear as silk?

moment, really.

I mean, two kids with stars in their eyes sharing a stolen moment of

Oh, wow.

Did you do stuff like that, Dad? Well, you know, not exactly like that.

I mean, first of all, we called it make -out rock. Oh, please. And that's

exactly what I did with a girl from your camp. All right. I cannot believe this.

You are going to compare my moment of romantic awakening with your night of

cheap thrills. I hope so.

Who said anything about cheap thrills?

She was the greatest.

I'll never forget her.

What was her name?

I forget.

But I'm telling you something. If there was a kissing decathlon, she'd have won

all ten events.

This girl had an extra set of lips.

They say poetry is dead.

Hey, I remember it was a hot summer night. And I do mean hot.

But I was cool.

There was something in the air. You could almost smell it.

Then I came to the clearing and there she was.

She was kind of tall and clumsy, but there was something about her.

Yeah, she was a girl.

Party hall hall.

Wait a minute. I may be way off on this, but you got to admit the stories do

sound alike.

I mean, the moon and the rock and... I know for a fact that it

wasn't you because...

I, unlike some people I know, remember the name of the first person I kissed,

and his name wasn't Tony, it was Anthony.

You can open up with me, Jonathan.

I'm the camp psychologist.

Why do you think you're homesick?

I guess because I miss home.

Just going down to Lake for a swim?

Yeah.

You want to come, Bauer?

Well, I don't know.

Oh, that's right. We forgot about the nut cake here.

Don't make fun.

There's a time bomb ticking in every one of your little spikies.

And who knows when it might go off?

Jonathan, don't pay any attention to those.

kids, just remember, I'm okay, you're okay.

Everyone else is toe jam.

Don't take any prisoners.

Angela, this place is terrific.

Yeah, it brings back a lot of memories. Oh, down there, that's the mess hall.

And then way over there is the nature cabin.

And then way down over there, that's where we used to sit and sing songs

the old campfire.

Oh, no.

It looks like you're singing around the old satellite dish now.

Does the old flagpole look familiar?

Anthony.

Mother, will you stop calling him that? It wasn't him. Yeah, and besides, Mona,

it was a Y camp. Everybody named Anthony.

Come on.

John, when you're homesick, everyone begins to sound like your mom.

Sweetheart! Oh!

Oh, my baby! My baby!

Are you all right?

Mom, do I stay here?

Of course not. Darling, we'll take you home first thing in the morning.

Can I sit in the front seat? Of course you can.

Can I be attached to the radio? You can listen to any station you want.

Is she always this indulgent?

Are you always this nosy?

Yes. I'm Bobby Wormser, camp psychologist.

Oh, a camp with a shrink.

Very good, Nancy.

Hey, Johnny, what do you do around here for fun?

Well, mostly we analyze my dreams.

That's no good. Look, this is camp. Why don't we do camp things like hiking or

riding horseback or looking for knotholes in the boys' shower? Sounds

me.

back right here.

You do have horses here, don't you, Jonathan?

I don't know.

Smells like it.

Sweetheart, why don't you call him?

I want to talk to Mr. Wormser.

Oh, you can call me Dr.

Bob. Great.

Come on, buckaroos. Let's mosey.

Bye, Dad. See you later. Have a good time.

Um,

Mr. Wormser, I've...

Dr. Bob, maybe you can help us out here. Why is my son so homesick?

Well, I think that he misses home.

Well, I've got to go. I've got arts and crafts.

Angela,

I learned something very important today. Never trust a shrink in a raccoon

Maybe he's just not ready for camp. Maybe we'll just... Send Jonathan next

Hey, maybe you should try a new camp next year. Why don't you send him to

camp I went to? Great time. You mean that camp where the boys don't remember

names of the girls they kissed?

Oh, come on, Angela. Why are you still bugged by this?

I'm not bugged by this.

I would just like to know. I mean, I already know.

I would like to be sure who it was and who it wasn't. Well, there's only one

to find out. Let's go up to Makeout Rock.

Kissing Rock.

What good is that going to do?

Well, after I kissed her.

Not you.

I carved her name, not yours, in the rock.

You did?

Yeah, yeah.

How very sweet.

I know.

For her.

Not me.

Jonathan,

I do not believe you want to leave this place now.

Well, Sam, it's only fun when you're here.

Well, when you got it, you got it.

Where's Grandma?

Oh, she was right behind us somewhere.

Okay. Okay, I'm in reverse.

I'm in reverse.

Oh, my gosh, I'm in reverse.

Angela,

it's getting dark.

And there's a storm coming up. Maybe we should just forget about this. No, no,

turn around.

Oh, wait a minute. Oh, that tree over there looks familiar.

Angela, it's a pine tree. I mean, pine trees are common in a pine forest.

Look, look.

I know how to find this place, okay?

Which way do you think it is?

That way. Okay, good. We'll go this way. Come on.

Come on.

There he is, Tony.

It's the rock.

Angela, are you sure you want to go through with this?

Oh, we both know it wasn't us, right?

Right.

But what if it was?

That just means that we kissed each other twice.

Once when we were kids and once when we were tipsy and you kissed me in the

kitchen. Angela, we were blasted and you kissed me.

What happened?

Let's look.

Okay.

Mary Lou.

Mary Lou.

Mary Lou. Gee, she was a busy little girl.

I found it. I found it.

Anthony and Ingrid.

Ingrid?

Ingrid?

Well, wasn't us. Yeah.

You see, Angela, there's no unseen force pushing us together.

Just like this. The wind was howling like a dying cat.

The rain pounded relentlessly against the window.

The report from the nearby mental institution said that the

infamous camper killer had escaped.

This lunatic would bludgeon anybody whose name was sewn

into their underwear.

Yeah.

Dr. Bob rides again.

Hey, Mama.

What about Dad and Angela?

Oh, don't worry, honey. Your dad knows enough to come in out of the rain.

And he can help Angela.

Well, here it is.

The presidential suite.

This is the presidential suite?

Well, Teddy Roosevelt liked it.

Sometimes on nights like this, he still comes around.

Well, bully for him.

Listen, we're soaking wet here. I'll take this one. You got something a

nicer for the lady?

This is the nicest room we got.

This is the only room we got.

Maybe we should just try to wade back to camp.

Did you ever get hit by lightning?

I did.

Look, Angela, we're stuck here, okay? Well, sleep tight.

Don't let the bedbugs bite.

Tony.

What? This won't work.

We can't stay in the same room alone together.

I know. What's the big deal? There's two beds. We're adults.

We sleep under the same roof at home.

It's not the same.

What do you mean it's not the same? It is, too. It's me and you here.

It's not like I'm holed up in a small motel in a thunderstorm with Ingrid.

I mean, hey, if I was with Ingrid, there might be trouble.

No, In, come here, baby.

Tony?

I'm Ingrid.

You're Ingrid?

What do you mean, you're Ingrid?

Well, I don't know.

a little nervous that night.

It was my first kiss and, well, I didn't want the boy, well, you, to kiss

and tell and so I said my name was Ingrid.

Why Ingrid?

I'd just seen Casablanca three times.

It was you.

It was us.