Original subtitles

[Pryce] Okay. Tell me what you know about golf.

Well, it's super boring and really bad for the environment.

And it is played by rich white men who have a thing for zip-up pullovers.

Okay, now, hold on.

Nothing marries style and comfort as effortlessly as the humble pullover.

And don't roll your eyes

'cause your hoodie is a cousin to the pullover.

And as for golf being boring, you're just dead wrong.

Golf, when it's played well, is an exquisite game.

Elegant. Almost metaphysical.

Golf can unlock the mysteries of the universe

if you're open to it.

I thought that rich white men already had a skeleton key

to the mysteries of the universe.

Can you unlock the mystery of why you have to have this conversation in here

while I'm sleeping?

Okay, we're gonna be quick.

Listen, the basics.

Each club is designed specifically for a particular challenge on the course.

Your driver and your woods, when you want to hit it far.

Irons, when you want to hit it a shorter distance.

But why not just use one club

and then, like, swing it less hard if you want to go shorter?

Oh, yeah. Try and hit a 50-yard pitch over a bunker with a wood.

- See what happens. - No, no. It's a fair question.

The higher the loft angle on the clubface, the higher you're gonna hit it.

The lower, the lower you're gonna hit it.

- Makes sense? - What's a clubface?

All right, just show her the fucking clubs.

It's "them." "Show them the fucking clubs."

- No, it's "her." - I thought it was them.

- It is. - You just said it was her.

- It is. - [Mitts] Jesus!

Just show them and her the fucking clubs.

Okay, this is the driver. Longish shaft, flat clubface.

And this hits the ball far.

Least it does with me.

Whoa. [chuckles]

[Zero] It's cold out here.

[Mitts] Because you're not wearing any pants.

- We get on with this, please? - [Pryce] Yeah, yeah.

But let's not gloss over the fact that you cannot hit the ball any better than that.

In other words, I pured it, flushed it.

That's something you might say.

- Mmm. Right. - But moving on to the irons.

You see the angled clubface?

Now, as you go up the irons, you hit the ball shorter,

but with more loft.

Here, let me show you.

Jesus, Mitts, did you see that?

Where was that 20 years ago?

Guys, woods go far. Irons go short. What's your point?

My point is, Santi is gonna want to club up.

He's gonna want to use a wood when he should be using an iron,

all right?

He makes bad choices.

Oh, that's rich coming from you.

This whole plan is a bad choice.

[scoffs] We wanna keep him out of trouble.

Don't let him get into that negative loop.

He doesn't listen to me, he listens to you.

So when we need to dial him back in, you're gonna be my mouthpiece.

I'm not okay with you using that word.

Our Cyrano de Bergerac.

Another way of saying it is you're gonna be our Zero-no de Bergerac.

No, that's a rough pun. That's bad.

That is a great pun.

You're smiling a little bit.

[groans]

Oh.

You just golfing now or what... what's happening?

Yeah, he doesn't really hear people when he's in the zone.

Okay, I'm going inside.

[Mitts] Turn the lights off when you're done.

[theme song playing]

Welcome to the local qualifier for this year's U.S. Amateur Championship.

The format is 36 holes of stroke play over two days,

with the top two golfers advancing to the final qualifier

at Forest Dunes Golf Club in Roscommon, Missouri.

Best of luck.

[Zero] Driver. Four iron. Three wood.

Play the left.

To the right.

Go for it.

You're massaging Mitts's balls.

Hey, Zero, I'm serious.

I know what it means. It means lay it up, okay?

I'm just fucking with you.

Okay, but it's just gonna be the two of you out there.

I can't go out there, so I need you to check in with me

on every single shot, especially on holes...

[Zero] Five, nine, 11, 17.

Yes, especially on 11.

Now, there's a bunker called the Copacabana.

That may sound like a good thing, it's not a good thing.

- He's gonna wanna fly it with the... - Three wood.

We want him to use...

- The five iron. - Good.

And things are fluid.

I understand, things are gonna change out there.

We just want to keep him out of trouble, play safe.

We don't wanna flip that switch,

where he starts seeing red 'cause then we can't get him back.

There he is. Hey! How ya doing, big dawg?

- Don't call me big dawg. - Copy that.

- You ready? - Yeah, let's do it.

- [Pryce] Nice. - [sighs]

- [whispers] Hey. - [Zero whispers] What?

[scoffs]

[official] Now on the tee, from New Haven, Connecticut, Tom Caruso.

[quiet applauding]

- Mashed potatoes! - Boomshakalaka!

[speaking Spanish] I hate golf bros.

- [stammers] - Yeah, they get worse every year.

Now on the tee, from Fort Wayne, Indiana, Santiago Wheeler.

Okay, here we go. [inhales sharply]

- [whooshes] - [golf bro] Bababooey!

King Kong!

[spectators applauding]

Think I'm gonna use a five.

[whispers] Come on.

Princeton's going for the green. I'm gonna hit my three wood.

If he can get it to the green from there, I can get it from here.

[Zero] Yeah, for sure.

But he's a yoked-up alpha bro

with Chinese characters tattooed on his arm. [chuckles]

So if you feel the need to compete with that, please.

[stammers] Do you have a better idea?

I mean, you're the golf expert.

What's the smart play?

Five iron. Lay it up short of the sand.

Okay, so play it smart.

He's not.

There we go.

- Oh, that's a smart play. - Smart.

[spectators applauding]

- This could be good. - [Mitts] You think?

They were a complete stranger two days ago,

and now she's caddie.

Your pronouns are all over the place, Mitts.

Look, I'm not gonna play this who's-on-first game with the pronouns.

If that person were playing a major role in my kid's life,

I'd want a little more information, that's all.

- Do you know her last name? - Their last name.

- And, no, I don't. - See?

That's what I'm saying.

Kid's like a fucking mystery.

They don't talk about themselves.

It's always some agenda, like, you know,

animal enslavement, or methane gas, or the patriarchy.

So you think that Zero is like the Tinder swindler?

I... I don't know who the fuck that is,

but I know something is sketchy when I see it.

Birdie, birdie, birdie! Yeah!

Come on! Yes!

Pretty good, right?

[exhales sharply]

Where are you going?

Mitts.

[scoffs] What's going on? What's wrong with you?

I keep trying to tell you you're playing with fire, all right?

- But fuck me. - You still think this is a bad idea?

You don't care what I think.

I tell you to zig and you zag,

and then when shit goes sideways, I gotta try to fix it, man.

What are you talking about?

This side hustle you got going with Zero and the kid.

I mean, you don't think about the consequences of your shit.

- And then I gotta pick up the pieces. - What pieces?

Everything's working.

He's first on the leaderboard. Look!

He keeps playing like this, he'll move on to the final qualifier.

[stammers] You know what? You're gonna do what you wanna do.

I don't even know why I'm wasting my breath.

[Zero] Your music library is, like, all over the place.

You got some AC/DC, Chino Pacas, fucking Hamilton.

- Oh, no. [chuckles] - Whoa.

- What can I say? [stammers] I'm eclectic. - Yeah.

I mean, if I was gonna profile you based on your music library,

you're either, like, a theater kid who raps all his solos,

or, like, a Russian bot trying to seem human. [chuckles]

Or you could profile me as a guy

who finished number one on the leaderboard today,

aka... [speaking Spanish] ...aka the greatest of all time,

- aka... [chuckling] - Whoa. Oh, my God.

The bot's getting cocky.

So what do we play for you if you drop down the leaderboard?

[sighs] I won't drop down.

But what if you do?

If you're not number one, you don't exist.

You don't exist? Wow, okay.

That's a lot to unpack there. Who taught you that?

My old coach.

- Okay, let me see your phone. - Okay.

I'm guessing there's lots of songs about life as a nomad.

What's that supposed to mean?

What? You said you haven't lived in a place longer than three months.

That makes you a nomad.

Isn't that hard?

Like, moving around so much?

Not really. I mean, I...

I move on when I, like, get bored, you know?

I need to be challenged.

Hmm.

Wait. "Flock of Clocks demo"?

- I need an explanation. - No, no, no. That's... That's...

I was in a band. I was very young. It's very bad.

- Give me... No, no. - Wait, wait. No, I wanna listen.

- I'm so listening to it. - You can't.

- Zero makes music? - Guys, guys, guys.

- Okay, stop, stop! Both of you. - [Santi chuckles]

[speaking Spanish]

We're just messing around.

Tomorrow you have a big day. You need to rest.

And Zero, I need help with the laundry.

Yeah, happy to help.

Give me my phone.

[chuckles] I will hear that song.

- Mm-mmm. Never, bot. - [chuckles]

Nomad.

Zero, what's your last name?

Duffy. Why?

Zero is an interesting name.

Well, I was born Christina Marie Duffy, December 4th, 2005.

Marion County Hospital, Lexington, Kentucky.

You want my, uh, Social Security or an emergency contact?

Am I that obvious?

- Yeah. Kinda. - No, I'm sorry. I just...

I realized that I know nothing about you.

No, I... I get it. I'm gonna be living with you guys for a few weeks.

Go ahead, ask me anything.

- Okay. Your parents. - Keith and Lila.

- Mm-hmm. - Keith is a career marine.

Lila was an artist.

She wasn't around.

Oh.

Yeah, it was just me and my dad.

So how did your dad react to you being...

Uh, genderqueer, anti-capitalist, postcolonial feminist?

- Mm-hmm. - Better than you would think.

- So did I pass? - Oh, it wasn't a test.

Hmm.

No, I just wanted to know more about you, now that you're one of us.

Okay. Now my turn.

Did Pryce really give you a hundred grand?

- Oh, he sure did. [chuckles] - Oh, my God. You're a legend.

- What are you gonna do with it? - Invest it.

I have an idea.

Niche commodity.

Some supply constraints could lead to big gains if I'm right.

Yeah. I was a business major before Santi was born.

You know, to be honest I'm not usually a proponent of corporate greed,

but holy shit, you're a she-bull.

- Are you calling me a cow? - No.

I'm calling you a fearless, risk-seeking motherfucking she-bull.

I don't know what that means, but I like it.

[chuckles]

[official] Welcome to day two of the U.S. Amateur Qualifier.

Now on the tee, our first round leader, Santiago Wheeler.

[cheering]

Mashed potatoes! [chuckles]

You said that yesterday, man.

Oh, yeah. You're right.

By the way, Zero's last name is Duffy.

We had a lovely chat last night.

And they're not sketchy at all.

They're sweet and thoughtful and excellent at folding laundry.

- And they called me a she-bull. - [Mitts] Mmm.

Still don't trust them.

Her. Them.

- Ay. - [Mitts] Yeah.

[whispers] Five iron.

You know, I could fly those trees, eagle, and end this thing right now.

Or you could mess up, drop out of first,

and then you wouldn't exist.

- Okay. - Attagirl.

"Attaperson."

[sighs]

- [gasps] What? - [Elena] Hey. Hey, hey.

- That's so sweet. Thank you. - Of course... [speaking Spanish]

You're carrying my son's clubs. You need to stay hydrated.

Oh. Santi's killing it, huh?

Yes. Thank God.

I was stressed going into this.

Last time he was in a real tournament... [sucks teeth] ...it wasn't great.

What happened?

- Well, his dad happened. - [scoffs]

Yeah, but he's not worth even talking about.

Oh, come on. I gave you my whole life story last night.

- Spill it. - [breathes deeply]

Santi's dad is what you call an asshole.

Mmm. What kind?

The asshole spectrum has many varieties.

The kind that showers a kid with love and attention

when they're playing good and takes it away when they're not.

Gary was always manipulating Santi,

and Santi never knew if what his dad said was real

or just some mind game to get him to do whatever he wanted on the course.

So, yeah. It's good to see him playing without all that caca, you know?

Yeah.

All right. Back at the Copa.

I'm in the lead.

I birdie it here, I bury that guy.

Let's have a little fun.

- Whoa, whoa. What's he doing? - Uh.

Yeah, you know what?

Fuck it.

Bury him.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, what's happening?

You're being shaken off.

No, no. That's okay. It's fine.

I don't need to joystick every shot. He's an athlete.

If he's feeling it, he can clear this, no problem.

[spectators groan]

It's okay.

No big deal.

Shit.

Holy four-putt, Batman. That dude just double bogeyed.

Administer the Heimlich because he's choking.

- [imitates choking, chuckling] - Okay, golf bros... [speaking Spanish]

Nobody likes you.

I mean, I think some people like us.

- She can't know that. There's... - Right? That's...

There's no way she could possibly know that.

[breathes heavily] Can I talk to you for a minute?

- Yeah. - [breathes heavily]

What happened on 11? Did you not see me?

- I was signaling four iron. - Yeah.

Well, he wanted to use the three wood. Who am I to disagree?

The person whose job it is to disagree when the situation calls for it.

Well, I'm not super into my job at the moment.

What is it with your generation being into their jobs?

I mean, do you think the guys that deice airplanes are into it?

Standing out there in the freezing cold blowing hot chemicals out of a hose?

Maybe I didn't wanna add to Santi's trauma

by pulling strings behind his back.

What trauma? [stammers]

That word has been so watered down by TikTok.

Look, Elena told me that Santi's dad was, like, super manipulative,

and it really fucked with his head.

And that's exactly what we're doing. We're manipulating him.

No, no, no. Manipulative's a negative word.

We're trying to help him succeed.

[scoffs] What even is success to you?

Like, money and cars and shit?

- What? - No.

It's his game. His potential.

The very things that his dad stole from him.

We can give it back to him.

I like him.

I like him too.

I don't wanna lie to him.

Zero, you don't have to.

You just have to help him.

Okay, help me help him.

I don't know if I can.

I promise, you can.

It's all gonna come down to the 17th hole.

If he doesn't birdie that, we're out of it for good.

He won't be able to qualify for the U.S. Amateur.

The plan is over, and we all just go home.

Zero, please listen to me.

I can't do it without you.

There's a pond on the left side of the fairway.

He's gonna want to try to carry that

because he takes every water hazard as a dare.

He doesn't need to.

He can just lay up to the right and go around and get his birdie that way.

But if he ends up in the pond, we're finished.

Come on, please.

- Stick with me. - [exhales sharply]

Okay, let me get my three wood. I'm gonna go over.

[sighs]

What, nah. [stammers] Trust me, I got it.

Give him the seven.

Remember when I told you

that I move on when I don't feel challenged?

It's not true.

I move on when I don't feel safe.

I get, like, antsy and insecure and I just completely bug out.

And... I mean, if...

if you don't qualify, I lose my job.

And honestly, I...

I'd like to keep it

'cause I feel safe with you.

With all of you.

I'm not ready to move on.

I'm not ready for you to move on either.

He's hitting seven.

Guys, he's hitting seven.

It's called thinking your way around the course.

Oh, you're gonna like that.

Yes, Santi!

Yes! Yes!

It's still rolling!

Get in the hole!

[spectators cheering]

What?

- Fuck that. - Come on!

[screaming, laughing]

Baby!

- I get it now. - Get what?

- [screams] - Nice job, baby!

- Exquisite. [chuckles] - I told you so.

Pryce!

Come on!

- [Elena] Pryce! Pryce! - [spectators cheering]

- [Pryce] All right. - [Elena cheers]

[Pryce] ...and then an eagle on 17.

Are you kidding me? Come on!

One more qualifier to go, and then it's U.S. Amateur Championship.

And Hurricane Santi is gonna make landfall.

And those guys aren't gonna know what hit 'em!

- Hey! Knock it off! Hey! - Some of this, and some of that!

[Santi laughs]

Goddamn it.

I told you to knock it off.

Fuck.

Hey.

Hey, Mitts. Hey.

So I guess this is because the plan with Zero is actually going pretty well?

- No, that ain't it. - Yeah.

You said to zig but I zagged, and zagged worked, and now you're pissed.

You know, fuck off, Pryce.

No, no. Why can't you just admit shit didn't go sideways.

- You don't have to pick up the pieces. - Yeah, not yet.

There's time though, pal.

Mitts, he just eagled 17 to win the qualifier.

That's a good thing.

That's why we came on this trip.

Yeah, that's not why I came.

Then... [sighs] ...then why did you come on it?

Because it seems to be my fucking job, whether I like it or not,

to hover over you and try to protect you from yourself.

[stammers] Protect me? [scoffs] I feel great.

Stop protecting me.

Look, I wish you could see it the way I see it, all right?

But you can't because you're... you're-you're cut off from reality.

[stammers] You can't see what this is really about, Pryce.

[stammers] What is this really about?

It's about Jett.

I mean, he would be about Santi's age now, you realize that, right?

This whole fucking thing, it's not about golf.

It's about all the shit you never dealt with.

Then tell me what dealing with it looks like. [stammers]

Do I have to put on a little show for everyone

and talk about it every day and process it?

Yeah, then no. I'm not gonna deal with it.

Look, I was in the hospital with you for over a year.

I was around when he died.

I was there when you lost your fucking mind.

And then you just stuck your head in the dirt.

You can't even say his name, Pryce, and that's weird.

I don't need to say his name, okay?

I hear it all the time.

And you wanna talk about weird?

We're riding around in Francine's sarcophagus.

Okay? [stammers]

But I'm supposed to take advice from you about processing grief.

- That's fucking out of line. - No.

It's like stepping into a pharaoh's tomb with all this shit for the afterlife,

i-if pharaohs were into needlepoint.

[breathes heavily]

Oh... [stammers] ...is that processing it?

Yeah, p-process it some more. Show me how to process it.

[grunts]

You push me again, and I'm gonna start processing it.

- Yeah, really? - Yeah, really.

- [grunts] - [grunts]

[grunting]

- [grunts] - Get off.

- [groans] No more pushing. - [sighs]

Fine. [sighs]

[inhales sharply] All right, look, man.

When you guys lost Jett,

I seriously thought you were gonna off yourself, all right?

You didn't, and eventually you came back, and you just acted like nothing happened.

I accepted that because you were okay,

- and... [stammers]...not great, but... - I know, and so what?

I mean, after Francine, you disappeared into the woods

and I didn't know if you were gonna make it.

But here we are.

You know, we're getting through it.

[sighs]

But... [sighs] ...Mitts... [breathes heavily]

What is so bad about this?

Come on.

You've put everything you've got into this kid, and I'm just nervous.

If it goes sideways,

I don't know if you'll come back this time.

I don't know if you can handle it.

That's why I came.

I...

[breathes heavily] And I appreciate it.

I know you're looking out for me.

- I need it. - It's my job. I'm your caddie.

[breathes heavily] I know, you're my caddie.

And you give me advice, tell me what you see,

where the traps are, how to play it.

But, you know at a certain point, I have to take the swing.

- That's the way it works, right? - That's the way it works.

So let me take the swing.

Let me help this kid.

Okay? And I don't know if it's a good play or a bad play,

but I want... I need to do it.

And I... I need you.

I literally can't do this without your help.

Okay.

And I'm sorry about the picture frame.

Ah, don't worry about it. I hated that picture.

I-I thought I looked haggard in it,

but Francine liked it 'cause her neck looked good.

- I don't know. - No, you looked great.

- You looked handsome. - Well, that's very kind of you.

And you're...

you're totally not fucked up.

[both chuckling]

- That's why we work. - [chuckles] Yeah. Yeah.

[Pryce grunts, sighs]

["Cecilia" playing]

[chattering]

["Cecilia" continues]

[speaks indistinctly]

Here you go.

Thank you.

[speaks indistinctly]

[Santi, Pryce speaking indistinctly]

[speaking indistinctly]

[speaking indistinctly]

Yeah.

[cheering]

CHAMPAGNE CUVEÉ de PRESTIGE 2021

[Pryce] Oh, wait.

- We gotta do a toast here to Santi. - [Elena speaking Spanish]

[Pryce] I mean, one minute you're working at the frozen food section

in Decatur Market.

The next minute, he's winning golf tournaments left and right.

- Next stop, U.S. Amateur! Cheers! - Mm-hmm.

- [all] Cheers! - [Elena speaks Spanish]

It's late. We gotta go to the hotel.

We're heading out at 6:00.

You sure you wanna drive over there and back in the morning?

What are the options?

Well, you can crash here.

You can take the big bed and Pryce and I will take the bunks,

and we'll kick these kids out into the wilderness.

- Camping? - [Mitts] Yeah.

I mean, I've got sleeping bags, I got pads.

You can set up on the roof, stare at the stars.

It'll be the best night of sleep you ever had.

Mami, can we?

- Pues let's do it. - [chuckles]

All right. Santi, grab dessert. I'll get the gear.

[speaking Spanish]

[Santi, Zero chuckling]

- Look at that. - What is it? What?

I don't know. It's like...

- Is that a star, or is that the moon? - Oh.

- I'm not... [chuckles] ...sure. - [chuckles] Dumbass.

[chuckles]