Original subtitles

[Bowling for Soup] ♪ There's another hundred and four days ♪

♪ Of summer vacation ♪

♪ And then school comes along just to end it ♪

♪ So the annual problem for our generation ♪

♪ Is finding a good way to spend it ♪

♪ Like maybe ♪

♪ Building a rocket or fighting a mummy ♪

♪ Or climbing up the Eiffel Tower ♪

♪ Discovering something that doesn't exist ♪

Hey!

♪ Or giving a monkey a shower ♪

♪ Surfing tidal waves Creating nano-bots ♪

-♪ Or locating Frankenstein's brain ♪ -It's over here!

♪ Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent ♪

-♪ Or driving our sister insane ♪ -Phineas!

♪ As you can see there's a whole lot of stuff to do ♪

-♪ Before school starts this fall ♪ -Come on, Perry!

♪ So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb ♪

♪ Are gonna do it all! ♪

♪ So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb ♪

♪ Are gonna do it all! ♪

Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!

[♪ cheerful country music playing]

Wow, it's massive.

A humongous boat is the perfect setting

for a humongous bust! [giggles]

-Bust boat! -[Phineas] Well, technically it's a ship.

Candace, it's a vacation.

A vacation from busting.

And tonight, we get to see something

that only happens once a decade.

The Tri-State Aurora.

A natural light show in the sky.

A shame there are no pets allowed.

Mmm, I know.

But it was sweet of Stacy to pet-sit.

-[♪ game music playing] -Eat my pixels, Teal-Boy.

Ah!

[chitters]

-Lucky shot. -[watch beeping]

Agent P, pack your pool noodles

and get to the Danville docks.

Doof boarded a party cruise

and my Aunt Olga is on that ship celebrating her birthday.

I don't want him to ruin her big day.

-Stop Doof. -[beeps]

Don't worry, I'll cover for you!

[door opens and closes]

But I'm not giving back this petsitting money.

[captain] Welcome aboard, passengers.

I'm your captain, Sven Jorgansenson.

Come sundown,

hit the upper deck and witness the majestic beauty

of the Tri-State Aurora.

Weather permitting, of course.

[engine roaring]

[♪ intense music playing]

[plopping]

Vanessa, thanks for coming with me on this cruise.

I... I've been needing a break from evil.

It's so much more than a job,

it's a lifestyle...

that you can take anywhere.

So behold!

My Travel-Size-Inator!

Isn't that the garage door clicker?

Well, yes, but... but I souped it up.

It's now my Travel-Size-Inator and it will shrink anything I want

down to travel-size so it will fit in my bag.

And then when I get home, I just reverse it and voila!

So, your idea of a break from evil is to steal everything on the ship?

It's not stealing.

This cruise was advertised as "all-inclusive",

-so I'm getting my money's worth. -Yeah, have fun with that.

I'm gonna go check out the ship, while there's still

stuff left to see on it.

Oh, not for long, sweetie. Have fun!

-[door closes] -Mini TV, mini mini-fridge.

Oh, it's so much cuter when it's mini-mini.

-[fires] -[♪ compelling music playing]

-You boys have fun. -Sure thing, Mom.

Absolutely splendid.

I'll take a deep dive into the history of this ship and-- Ooh!

-Oh. Oh my! Oh. -[♪ cheerful dance music playing]

We'll meet back here tonight for the Aurora!

Forget the boys, Candace. We're on vacation.

Let's head to the spa. That'll help you,

I mean us, unwind!

Hmm. We're out of our natural habitat, Ferb.

And I know what we're gonna do today!

Antiquated spherical artillery!

Cannonball!

Sure, if you want to say it the easy way.

Cool castle!

Yeah, this is fun,

there's only so much we can do with these blocks.

We can help with that.

Ferb, did you pack those miniature medieval catapults?

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz] I'll take that!

There you go!

I'll take that!

Just getting my money's worth.

And ooh That would look nice in my foyer!

[Perry chitters]

Ahhh. Perry the Platypus.

How nice of you to join our little family vac--

[grunts]

Ow, my toe!

Aah!

[captain] Attention, passengers!

Due to unexpected cloud cover,

tonight's Aurora might be obstructed from view.

Let us hope for a change in the weather.

-What! -Come on!

-Bummer! -Well, looks like it's time to head back

into the windowless casino and lose all sense of time and spatial awareness.

-Thanks, Phineas and Ferb. -Oh, you're welcome.

But with those clouds,

no one will be able to see the Aurora.

Well, Ferb,

I know what else we're gonna do today.

My busting senses are tingling.

[groans]

[masseuse] Oh, that's just the massage oil, honey. Relax...

Oof! Ow! Okay, okay! I'm relaxing!

[seagull squawks]

[gasps]

Vanessa Doofenshmirtz? Is that you?

Monty Monogram?

What are the odds? Wow! It's been a while.

Oh, uh, please allow me to introduce you to Olga,

my Dad's vaguely European aunt.

[in Eastern-European accent] You, nice young girl, take stroll,

eat food with nephew.

I must soak foot.

Okay, Auntie. I'll see you later.

-Shall we? -We shall.

♪ One, two, cha cha cha! One, two-- ♪

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz screams]

Huh?

[chuckles]

[groans]

Now I've got potato salad in my pants!

Again!

It's crazy us bumping into each other like this.

But I'm glad we did.

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz screams]

Ooh! Mini corn dogs!

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz screams indistinctly in tiny voice]

Okay, Ferb.

While a subatomic deionization ray could dissipate the cloud cover

it might be simpler to just raise the ship above the clouds.

But how?

[Earl] Just look at us, Eddie.

We've already run out of kids to make the balloon animals for.

What are we gonna do with the rest of this helium?

Ferb, We're gonna need bigger balloons.

[♪ happy song playing]

Check it out! It's working!

So, Nessa... I gotta ask,

what happened between us?

You kinda just stopped calling.

I don't know.

The whole star-crossed-love thing was fun and all, but

I just couldn't keep lying to my Dad about us.

Wait! Star-crossed-love? Wait! Wait!

Vanessa! Was this your secret boyfriend?

This guy?

The guy with the enormous nostrils?

Hey, you've got a bat in the cave there, buddy!

Well, the rules are different. We're on international waters...

Wa-wa-wait! No, no, no! I'm not on the menu!

Did you hear something?

Probably my stomach. I'm starving.

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz screaming]

[Monty gulps]

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz continues screaming in panic]

[coughs] Sorry, didn't agree with me.

Well, that was smooth, huh? Unlike these potatoes.

Um, I'm gonna need another napkin.

Right away, sir.

Work on a cruise ship, they said.

You'll see the world, they said.

You won't just be picking up random people's soiled napkins, they said.

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz screams]

Oh! Come on!

[seagull squawks]

Hey guys, check out the Aurora.

Whoa!

[woman singing] ♪ When we're up high above the clouds ♪

♪ We glide without a care ♪

♪ And while there's all of there ionized particles ♪

♪ Flowing through our hair ♪

♪ It's oh so nice to have a ship that we can commandeer ♪

♪ So we can soar among the colorful disturbances ♪

♪ Of our magnetosphere ♪

♪ We couldn't see a thing below the hazy overcast ♪

♪ We had to think of something ♪

♪ Cos this light show couldn't last ♪

♪ We won't let disappointing weather patterns ever keep us down ♪

♪ When the Tri-State Aurora comes around ♪

♪ It's nice to have balloons and helium ♪

♪ From two disgruntled clowns ♪

♪ When the Tri-State Aurora comes around ♪

♪ Comes around ♪

♪ Comes around ♪

[glasses crash]

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz] Hey! Hey! Let us go, you sky rat!

[seagull squawks]

[screams] Thank you!

[Aunt Olga snoring]

[groans]

Ah! Thank goodness!

Perry the Platypus, you're okay!

But not for long...

En guard!

[Phineas] Way to go, Ferb! We did it!

Wait... did what?

[gasps]

Phineas and Ferb! That's absolutely beautiful!

And absolutely bustable!

Mom! The boys tied massive circus balloon animals to the ship

and we're flying through the sky.

Candace, do you even hear the words that come out of your mouth?

You need to relax, honey.

No! Cucumbers can wait! Must show proof!

Hey! Hey, wait!

How does this toy castle have working catapults?

-[crowd] Conga conga conga! -Hurry, Mom!

I'm not sure we're allowed to run on the deck, Candace.

[thunderclap]

Hurry, Mom! There were huge balloon animals and they're making us fly!

Look, Mom! Quick!

[Linda] Magnificent!

Thanks for making sure I didn't miss it, dear.

A perfect end to our mother-daughter day.

But, but, but, but--

[sighs] Oh, never mind.

It really is beautiful.

[captain] Well, passengers,

I am happy to announce

the clouds have parted.

Take a look at the magic of the Tri-State Aurora.

Perry the Platypus, hold your tiny horses!

I just remembered.

My Inator had a reverse switch this whole time!

I don't know what I was thinking!

[guard 1] Freeze!

What? It said it was all-inclusive in the brochure.

Oh, it is.

We're arresting you for smuggling a platypus on board.

No pets allowed.

He's not my pet! We have a complicated relationship.

[Monty] Wow. I'd say something really sweet and clever right now,

but I got nothing.

Me neither.

Eh, we're in international waters.

I guess it is pretty amazing.

[blows nose]

Fine!

Truly marvelous!

You should have seen it up close.

[Linda] It's so beautiful.

How is it so beautiful?

The scope of possibilities in this world is as vast as the ocean

and as limitless as the cosmos.

See Earl?

[high-pitched] This makes all those clown college student loans worth it.

Well, Perry the Platypus,

it looks like ano-- wai---

Curse you, Perry the Platypus.

And curse you too,

you awe-inspiring natural phenomenon.

Hi, Fireside Girls.

Let's welcome another day for us to be

chipper, cooperative and cheer in unison!

[girls cheering]

As you all know, the Annual Fireside Cupcake Jamboree is coming up

and we have a big decision to make--

Picking the cupcake flavor to bring.

Ms. Feyersied will be here soon

-to guide the proceedings--- -[telephone ringing]

Oh. Hi Ms. Feyersied.

You won't make it in today--

I guess I can run the meeting.

I'll just follow the Fireside Handbook.

Feel better! Bye!

So, I guess we'll go ahead and start.

Our trusty Fireside Handbook has some guidelines to follow!

Starting with the compliment session.

You are worthy of every patch you've earned.

You always inspire me to get 1% better.

You have natural charm and leadership ability.

Sorry to, uh, ping your pong, Agent P.

But we've received word that Doofenshmirtz has made

an appointment to renew his evil business license.

And the only thing worse than regular evil is unlicensed evil.

So make sure he does the proper paperwork.

[Carl] That reminds me, sir.

OWCA's business license expired last month!

There's nothing wrong with unlicensed good, Carl.

Oh, uh, since you're in the area,

Carl would appreciate it if you renewed our license too.

I think it's cupcake time.

-Cupcakes are life! -Yay!

Cupcake time!

So, it says here, we should vote on our preferred cupcake flavor.

That should be super easy.

-Vanilla! -Vanilla!

Vanilla!

Red Velvet.

What? I like red velvet.

I like red velvet.

-Vanilla! -Red Velvet!

-Vanilla! -Red Velvet!

-Vanilla! -Red Velvet!

So what do we do now, Isabella?

Oh, um, well, eh--

It says here,

"In the incredibly unlikely event of a tie vote...

just vote again."

Hmm. All in favor of vanilla, raise your hand.

All in favor of red velvet?

Hmm. I don't remember a single time

we didn't unanimously pick the same thing, then rejoice in a harmonized shriek.

Hmm. A split decision. Now what?

This is a situation the Fireside Girls have never had to deal with.

Perry the Platypus!

Walk and talk, my nimble friend. Walk and talk.

I have to renew my evil business license

at Danville's Embassy for Evil today.

You can come along in case I need someone to vouch for my evilness,

which I think... I think you can do.

Shoo! Shoo! Find your own Inator

to put your gross pigeon feet on!

Have you seen pigeon feet?

Well, don't start now. Trust me.

You can't unsee them. Disgusting.

That's the trap I was gonna use on you

but my evil license expired as we previously established,

and I don't want to pay all those fines.

[clears throat]

Adyson, you were the first to earn a cupcake delivery patch.

How about you deliver your trash to the trashcan?

[to herself] Or maybe you should get a shut your cakehole patch.

-Excuse me? -Nothing.

Maybe we should try giving the cupcake flavor another vote.

What if we did donuts?

-Hooray! -Donuts!

[Katie] I love dunkable snacks!

Okay ladies. I think we should stick to cupcakes.

Let's just pick one.

Red velvet or vanilla.

How about neither? Let's pick a new flavor.

-Why not donuts? -I'll never back down from the donuts.

-[Katie] I have no agency! -Girls! Stop!

I'm sorry. Let just, um...

Okay, here's an idea from the "One of those days" section.

Let's all hold hands and sing a jovial song.

In D major. And a one, two, a three--

[all singing off tune and out of sync]

Wha-- What's happening?

We've never gone off pitch!

Is there a full moon tonight? Is Mercury in retrograde?

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz] It should take just a minute, Perry the Platypus.

Diminutive... I'd say it's nice to see you,

but I'm an evil scientist, not a liar.

Doofenshmirtz.

Yes, yes, enough of this awkward banter.

I'm cutting in line.

[girls arguing]

Isabella, why don't you let me take over the meeting?

It seems like it's too much for you.

It's not too much for me, Gretchen.

It's a cupcake vote, just pick a flavor.

You want to put us all in these little boxes,

like your stupid little vanilla cupcakes.

But we just want to do whatever we want!

You are not the boss of us.

[Holly] Not the boss!

-Whatever we want! -General anger!

Just vote for a flavor!

Who wants vanilla?

[sassy tone] Vanilla, huh?

Do you have a patch for being basic?

[all exclaim]

Well I do have the most patches.

So yes, I probably do have that basic patch!

Um, what I mean to say is, let's focus, girls.

The girls need someone to make a choice!

To lead them!

Gretchen, what's going on?

We're always on the same page!

I think it's time I have my own page.

A new page.

[girls disagreeing loudly]

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz] Oh, hello, handsome.

[kiosk] Do you have a viable backstory?

Oh, plenty! Plenty!

Back in Drusselstein, in the days o--

[kiosk] Please do not monologue into the interface.

Perhaps you shouldn't have asked!

[kiosk] Please select your nemesis.

Uh, he's more of a, a frenemy,

but our boundaries are fluid.

You're ready to begin your assessment.

Right this way, please.

See! Cupcakes can be donuts too!

We don't have to conform to society's norms anymore!

Non-conformity!

Cupcakes with holes!

I... taste... power!

Only whoever holds the handbook should speak!

Your taste is suspect, Isabella!

Who even thinks triangles are cute?

-He's more than a triangle! -[Holly grunts]

That's not like me!

[Gretchen] The choice is easy!

Red velvet! Or donuts!

Pick your side!

-Chocolate! -Cronuts!

Cheese plate!

Remember, girls! Cooperate!

Appreciate!

Ahh!

Flan!

1:00 PM: taste test the girls' cupcakes!

[girls screaming]

I love it! I love the taste!

You can't see us like this!

I guess girls do mature faster than boys.

Your next assignment is scheming.

Take over this model of the Tri-State Area.

Your time starts now.

Doof likey.

Well, first I would place a robot army right here.

Wait-- wait-- that's a one-way street,

so they would actually, I guess be over here.

Wait-- this is no longer a vacuum store.

They actually sell T-I-R-E-S.

Tires. They sell tires there--

And who made this model?

This can't be a restaurant.

They're not zoned for food.

And time's up.

Eh, that tracks I suppose...

Okay, we're just gonna montage through the next few tests.

[♪ upbeat music playing]

[screams excitedly]

[groans]

[groans]

[remote beeps]

[groans]

♪ Pick a side or bring the fire ♪

Cooperate, you animals!

♪ Pick a side or bring the fire ♪

♪ Pick a side or bring the fire ♪

♪ Bring the fire, and watch it... ♪

♪ Burn ♪

♪ Watch it all burn ♪

♪ Watch your back, I'm ready to rumble ♪

♪ Were gonna see which way the cupcake crumbles ♪

♪ We bake them from scratch ♪

♪ You've met your match ♪

♪ I'm gonna earn my anarchy patch ♪

♪ Watch it burn ♪

♪ Watch it all burn ♪

[screams]

-♪ You want vanilla, but I'm seeing red ♪ -♪ Velvet ♪

♪ I think there's something wrong with your head ♪

♪ I'm not sweet, I'm sour ♪

♪ I'm hungry for power ♪

♪ And this escalated in less than an hour ♪

♪ Watch it burn ♪

♪ Watch it all burn ♪

♪ Watch it burn ♪

♪ Watch it all burn ♪

Are there any more tests?

No, you completed all the tests.

But our system is down, so you'll have to come back tomorrow.

What? Tomorrow?

Or you can do it all online.

Online? That was an option this whole time?

Well, ain't that a kick in the--

Ow!

They really need to add a section for this in the handbook.

This is seriously out of control.

But I feel so safe with you, Isabella.

Like nothing bad will ever happen--

[screams]

Man, that was difficult.

It used to be so easy, just like filling out a piece of paper

and dropping it off.

All right, Perry the Platypus, you can do your thing now.

I've got the rest of the afternoon off. Apparently.

[kiosk] Congratulations, you have renewed your good business license!

You know, I'm just gonna take the high road

and use this as a backstory for some--

[kiosk] Please do not monologue into the interface.

I can't lie, girls.

I'm tempted to join you all in the chaos.

Maybe there's a patch at the end of this very dark tunnel,

but for the first time, I don't know...

Down with Isa-smella!

Down with Isa-smella!

[screams]

Son of a patch!

That's it!

[Isabella and Gretchen scream]

Wait, wait, why is this turned on?

Shoo, shoo bird, shoo. Huh.

I hope my Uncooperate-Inator didn't cause

any problems in that little building over there!

[girls screaming]

[chorus singing] ♪ Ooooh, la la la ♪

♪ Ooooh, la la la ♪

♪ Ooooh, la la la ♪

♪ Ooooh, la la la ♪

[machine turns off]

[fire crackling]

That was... weird.

-What happened? -I have no idea.

So, how about red velvet... with vanilla frosting?

[all girls] Yay!

See? Everything works out when you cooperate.

[screaming]

-♪ You want vanilla, but I'm seeing red ♪ -♪ Velvet ♪

♪ I think there's something wrong with your head ♪

♪ I'm not sweet, I'm sour ♪

♪ I'm hungry for power ♪

♪ And this escalated in less than an hour ♪

♪ Watch it burn ♪

♪ Watch it all burn ♪

♪ Watch it burn ♪

♪ Watch it all burn ♪