Original subtitles

♪ There's another hundred and four days of summer vacation ♪

♪ And school comes along just to end it ♪

♪ So the annual problem for our generation ♪

♪ Is finding a good way to spend it ♪

♪ Like maybe ♪

♪ Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy or climbing up the Eiffel Tower ♪

♪ Discovering something that doesn't exist ♪

Hey!

♪ Or giving a monkey a shower ♪

♪ Surfing tidal waves ♪

♪ Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain ♪

It's over here!

♪ Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent ♪

♪ Or driving our sister insane ♪

Phineas!

♪ As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff ♪

♪ To do before school starts this fall ♪

Come on, Perry!

♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! ♪

♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! ♪

Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!

A little bit more to the left.

No. To the left of the pickles. Perfect!

Hey, Phineas. What you do... Woah!

That's a lot of deli.

It's more than that.

It's an actual submarine sandwich submarine.

I can't believe we hadn't thought of it sooner.

Oh, sure, you like this bread-related activity but not mine?

Are you still going on about that bread bowl hot tub?

It's a long summer and I am a patient man.

[Linda] So, I hope the Sandcastle-Building Queen

is ready to defend her crown today.

Yeah, yeah. Building castles made of sand.

I know it's today, Mom, but right now I have bigger fish to fry.

The boys are building the biggest and stupidest thing

in Phineas and Ferb history. Wait till you see this

ridiculous overly literal monstrosity.

Candace! Hey hey! Don't let your brothers distract you.

Not today. Your unlimited sandcastle potential is at stake.

-But, but, but... -Well, I'm heading to the beach now,

with my famous sub sandwiches.

I'll see you there, winner.

-[call disconnects] -Oh, yeah, you'll see me.

And you'll also see what the boys are making.

[giggle builds to maniacal cackling]

And this is what the sandwich would look like in a storm.

-[thunder rumbling] -[all] Ooh!

But today, we're gonna plant our flag

in the deepest part of the ocean.

The Mariana Trench! [grunts]

Mariana Trench? Then we're gonna need trench coats?

Sounds exciting and dangerous.

Oh, here we go.

"Little Miss Safety Patch" strikes again.

Uh-uh-uh. Some would say I got most of these safety patches

from pulling your biscuits out of the fire.

I like my biscuits hot!

Anyway, we're gonna need high pressure hull insulation,

radar, sonar, and a periscope.

Absolutely!

Speaking of high pressure hull insulation...

where's Perry?

Intriguing segue.

[♪ spy music playing]

Morning, Agent P, I... Wait, what?

-Why am I a sock puppet? -[Carl] It's a filter, Sir.

-Well, turn it off! I hate it. -[Carl] I don't know what button you hit.

Why would this even be an option?

It was part of the bundle.

Okay, it's funny when it's you. [laughs] I'm just gonna roll with it.

Agent P, Doofenshmirtz has been stealing people's food right off their plates.

It's rude, even for him.

-Clearly his mom didn't teach him... -[plate shatters]

-[cat meows] -...a lot of things.

Which is why we all have a job.

So get to it, Agent P.

Eh, hold on sir, I think I found the button.

Whoops!

[sighs] You're such a weenie, Carl.

♪ Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! ♪

Ah, Pericles the Platypus!

I don't know what Perry is short for, so I'm just trying stuff out.

Until you tell me any different, Pericles the Platypus. That's your name.

-In the meantime... -[button clicks]

It's the surf n' turf n' pus special.

You see, you're the turf, and the lobster's the surf

and I guess you're also the surf,

'cause you're semi-aquatic and... Oh, never mind.

You see, I'm stuck here waiting for my oven repairman

who gave me a ridiculous window.

Not this ridiculous window of me kicking an orange.

Long story, don't even ask.

I'm talking about a ridiculous window of time.

From 5:00 a.m. this morning until a week from Tuesday.

I've gotta wait around.

I'm stuck here and I can't go out to get any food, so I invented...

The "Fork-It-Over-inator!"

I type in the kind of food I want here,

which sends a message to a decommissioned cold war spy satellite,

which then bounces the signal right back here,

an unnecessary step I am still very proud of.

That signal fires off this surprisingly expensive

fork harpoon into said food wherever the inator finds it,

and reels said food right back here to me.

If the world can't be my oyster,

then the Tri-State Area will be my buffet!

Everyone's food will be my food.

I am so lazy.

Ow!

Ugh, turns out that wasn't actual food.

But you get the idea, Periodontal the Platypus.

Blink twice if I'm getting warmer.

Our sub should carry us deeper

than anyone has ever been before. In meat.

And a little extra yeast in the baguette

will increase our overall maneuverability.

And what's the science behind this?

Please save your questions till the end.

-Is it the end? -No. And that is also a question.

[pirate] ♪ Let's build a sub with meat and cheese ♪

♪ To dive beneath the open seas ♪

♪ A mayo and a mustard squeeze ♪

♪ Classic deli style ♪

♪ Toasted bread with sesame seeds ♪

♪ Tomatoes, ham and pepperoncinis ♪

♪ But can you hold the onions, please? ♪

-♪ We'll be at sea awhile ♪ -[burps]

♪ It's our underwater luncheon meat machine ♪

♪ Made with salted savory pressurized cuisine ♪

♪ We're traveling to depths you've never seen ♪

♪ In a submarine sandwich submarine ♪

♪ Sandwich submarine ♪

[vocalizing]

♪ Sandwich submarine ♪

-Who are you? -I'm an oven repair guy,

but I've got time to kill. Nowhere to be until a week from Tuesday.

-[cell phone beeps] -Phineas and Ferb

and some oven repairman, apparently, are building a--

Honey, where are you? The sandcastle competition started.

Something, uh, big came up, and, uh--

Please, don't tell me this is about the boys.

-Is this about the boys? -You told me not to tell you.

Can you hear how disappointed my face looks?

It's okay. We'll be there soon,

-helicopter's coming. -[Linda] What?

Who, me? Oh, I'm just an innocent stowaway.

[giggles]

All right, everybody, hop in!

Ah! Eat that, Periwinkle the Platypus!

Hey, no! No! Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Timeout! Timeout. That's my good china.

Here. This is my bad china. Have at you.

We've done it. We're at the ocean floor.

Ha-ha! I got you!

Just wait till Mom sees, whatever all this is.

Oh, hey, Candace. Always room for one more.

We're about to stick our flag in the deepest part of the ocean!

Um, is the Mariana Trench supposed to have two gross blood-shot eyes?

No. Why do you ask?

-That's why. -[gasps]

-[screams] -We gotta get out of here.

Move over, Ferb! I've almost got my license.

Come on, gimme something good. Daddy needs a new pair of shoes

or, you know, whatever the food equivalent of that is.

You get it.

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Grrr! Big money, big money, no whammy!

No dessert until your plate is clear. [exclaims]

Woohoo!

[all] Aw!

Luckily, I'm wealthy and can afford more.

[laughs] I'm so alone.

[grunts]

Table. Table. Buffet. Ooh, prime rib. Wealthy.

[Phineas] Whoa!

Quick! We've only got one shot or this sub is toast.

Hit the dead man's drop maneuver.

That doesn't sound very safe.

It's safer than being eaten by a giant fish monster.

Move over, Candace! Everyone, hold on!

[all screaming]

We may be doomed, but these nimble fingers

and five years of violin lessons can play us out in style.

[playing a sad tune]

[Phineas] It's still gaining on us.

And it's eating bits of our sub.

Perhaps in hindsight, we should not have made our submarine out of food.

We gotta get out of here.

Good thing we have an escape vehicle.

It's our substitute submarine sandwich submarine.

A sub sub sub, if you will.

We just have to open this hatch,

-and we'll be home free. -[exclaims] Huh! There is no handle.

Why are there bite marks?

-Nobody packed any snacks. -We can't get in the escape pod?

Well, we can't get in the escape pod, but maybe we can still use it.

Isabella, swing around to starboard.

[all screaming]

Ferb, eject the pod!

What? But that's our only way out of--

We just need to distract it. Jettison the sub!

[gulps]

[burps]

It was made of food, too.

Everybody to your stations. We're surfacing.

Mom, Mom, Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom!

Where were you, sweetie?

-We're all waiting for your submission. -Oh, come with me, Mom.

I've got a submission, all right.

A sub-mission. You will not believe your eyes.

Okay, I believe I won't believe my eyes.

This was actually productive.

This food fight is gonna feed me for weeks.

And thank you for washing your hands.

Food safety and even-length shoelaces,

two things people always take for granted--

Wait, has that time clock always been there?

[screaming]

Nice serve! Wait. Is that Love Handel?

Oh, that's gonna burn tomorrow!

[grunting]

Mom! Mom! Look!

-Oh, look! -Wait, what?

No! It was a real submarine, I swear.

Oh, I get it,

a submarine sandwich submarine sand sculpture.

You've got such special skills, sweetie.

You've really outdone yourself.

I'm so proud of you, and I ran into a sandcastle college recruiter

who thinks he can get you a scholarship.

-Ten out of ten! -Ugh!

-But, but, but... I didn't do this! -[kids cheering]

Oh, there you are, Perry!

[chitters]

[knock on door]

And, he missed his window.

I can't believe my baby is 16 and taking her driver's license test.

-[teenager] Why? [sobbing] -I can't believe my baby is 16

and failed her driver's license test.

And another one bites the dust.

Don't worry, sweetie. You got this!

You know the driver's manual by heart,

and your dad and the boys have been helping you parallel park.

[tires screeching]

[screams]

Yeah, yeah, that was helpful.

-[cell phone vibrating] -Here's your dad.

Hello! Just calling to say good luck on your test.

Imagine the newfound freedom you'll have if you don't fail.

-Which of course you won't. -Then why are you fixing my bike?

What-What, this? Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

I have all the confidence. This is, uh, this is just in case...

-[man] Candace Flynn. -[yelps]

[Linda] She's right here!

I'll be waiting over at the park till your test is over.

Break a leg, sweetheart!

All right, let's get this over with.

[groans nervously]

Coming.

Whoa! What you doing?

Check it out. Gecko Gear!

We got the idea from watching a gecko documentary.

They can lick their own eyes.

But more importantly, they can climb up walls,

which is why we made these gloves and boots

from thermoplastic polymers that can stick and re-stick to any surface.

Um, 12% more gumminess, Ferb.

[wind blows]

[machine powers up]

[machine beeps rapidly]

Nailed it. 12% exactly!

Of course, geckos don't have springs, so we added that part.

Grab a set!

We thought it might be fun

to take a sticky tour around Danville today.

Get out of the yard and stretch our polymers.

Let's go! Cool.

Ah! Oh! [giggles]

My spring may be wound a little too tight.

I've been saying that for years.

[panicked yelling]

-Follow Baljeet! -Yay!

Hey, am I the only one wondering where Perry is?

[♪ spy music playing]

Oh, hello, Agent P. That portrait turned out great, didn't it?

I left a copy on your desk there, Agent P.

[Major Monogram] We clean up pretty nice, don't we, team?

Anyhoo, Doofenshmirtz was up all night tinkering with his car.

Now, we know he's not a car guy, so something is up.

We've tracked him to the local grocery store.

Go check on him, Agent P.

[♪ investigative music playing]

Sir, are you flexing your arms

-in this one? -No! No, I'm not!

And if you happen to be looking for the beach, Carl, it's that way.

[grunts]

[chuckles nervously]

Start the car.

Okay. Start the car.

Ow! Whoops. [giggles]

[engine starts]

[tires screeching]

[♪ tense music playing]

[all cheering and laughing]

-[horns honking] -[screams]

Longer sustained movements are preferable.

[groans]

Ah, hello, Perry the Platypus. You shop here, too?

Do you need a basket? [laughs]

Funny, I've never thought about you shopping.

Aw, your little cart with your little groceries.

You're a complete mystery to me.

You can relate to this big problem I have.

Don't you hate it when you get stuck in traffic coming home from the store

and you have ice cream and other perishables?

Don't ask why I don't have any bags.

Anyway, then everything starts melting and... hold on.

[cart rattles]

Yes, of course I return the cart. I'm evil, I'm not a monster.

Anyway, behold the RedGreenShift-inator!

It can turn street lights from red to green,

and get me home before my groceries get grosseries.

There's something in there, I'll workshop it later.

Anyway, I simply press this button, and switcharooney!

[tires screeching]

Look, I know what you're thinking.

This could be dangerous with traffic and all.

But have you had room temperature tuna, Perry the Platypus?

That's the real danger.

That's the collapse of society right there.

-[engine starts] -Okay! Things are a-thawin'. Toodles!

[key chirps]

[Candace] Okay, you want me to go left,

but can't I technically make three rights to make the left?

I mean, I know two wrongs don't make a right,

but three rights do make a left, right?

-Ugh. -[Phineas] Hey!

There's Candace taking her test.

Go, Candace!

-You got this. -Go, Candace!

-You got this, Candace. -Go, Candace!

Don't get nervous and make a series of bad decisions

that cause you to fail your driver's test and haunt you for the rest of your life!

-Buford! -What? I told her not to do that.

Phineas and Ferb, I am busting your biscuits.

Buckle up, dude. It's about to get real.

♪ I follow the rules ♪

♪ Obeying all of the signs ♪

♪ I'm not incurring any traffic fines ♪

♪ I'm only passing on a dotted white line ♪

♪ I'm not distracted by the traffic noise ♪

♪ I paid attention in my driver's ed class ♪

♪ I'm fully focused hoping I'm gonna pass ♪

♪ I pop the clutch and put my foot on the gas ♪

♪ You know I'm gonna bust those boys ♪

♪ I've got a license to bust Full throttle full thrust ♪

♪ Put my pedal to the metal Go and eat my dust ♪

♪ I've got a license to bust In the handbook we trust ♪

♪ Ten and two, I check the view ♪

♪ And bust a U I got a license to bust ♪

♪ I got a license to bust ♪

♪ I've got a license to bust ♪

♪ I got a license to bust ♪

♪ You know I got a license to bust! ♪

The park! Mom!

[honking]

[quacking]

Oh!

[sighs in relief]

[grunts]

Mom, get in!

-Uh... Okay. -[car door opens and closes]

You gotta see what the boys are doing. I'm hot on their trail.

Ah, Perry the Platypus!

Yes, yes, I've acquired a few more things that need to get somewhere fast.

There's an expectant mother, a magician holding his breath,

and an ice sculpture of a pregnant magician holding her breath.

Don't ask. It's been a weird day.

Perry the Platypus, I'm not even breaking any laws,

the lights are green. You're trying to get me to break the law.

This is entrapment!

Pesto? I ordered marinara.

Summer's great, but fall's my favorite.

It's always about you, isn't it, Janice?

-Hey, cool hair. -Back at ya.

Good luck. Heinz is a great name.

For a boy or a girl, I'm just saying.

Isn't that lovely, Perry the Platypus?

[tires screeching]

And you'll finish up by parallel parking right over there.

Oh, no! What's going on?

The Gecko Gear is getting dirty and losing its stick.

[all screaming]

[all giggling]

I'll be right back!

[pants] Wait! Where are your sticky hand thingies?

I gotta show Mom!

We were done, they're right over there.

Wait, how did the test go?

[giggles evilly]

I hope I'm insured for this!

[gasps] A pregnant magician? You remembered our first date.

You guys get ice cream?

Pork loin? Eh, I can work with that.

-Oh, there you are, Perry! -[chitters]

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz] Curse you, Perry the Platypus!

Mom, mom, mom!

But, but, but, but...

I don't understand what has gotten into you, Candace.

Miss Flynn-Fletcher?

I know. I'll be riding my bike till I'm 35.

Well, if that's what you choose.

But you can also drive a car.

-You passed. -I did?

That's wonderful, honey.

In the face of the craziest traffic,

I have never seen more alert and focused driving

in all my life.

This is the thrill I've been waiting for.

By the way, I have two sisters I always wanted to bust.

[both] And you never will get us, Brian.

Mother? You have got to see what the girls are doing.

But, but, but...

Congratulations, Candace.

Thanks, guys. Okay, who wants to go for a ride?

Wait a second, did you guys do something with your hair?

-You like it? -Wait, that you notice?

The thing they used to build these things is still in the backyard. Come on!

But, but, but...

[Linda] Candace, you did such a great job driving us all home.

♪ I've got a license to bust Full throttle full thrust ♪

♪ Put my pedal to the metal Go and eat my dust ♪

♪ I've got a license to bust In the handbook we trust ♪

♪ Ten and two, I check the view ♪

♪ And bust a U I got a license to bust ♪

♪ I got a license to bust ♪

♪ I've got a license to bust ♪

♪ I got a license to bust ♪

♪ You know I got a license to bust! ♪