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1
00:00:02,270 --> 00:00:05,139
And yea, verily
doth it be decreed
2
00:00:05,173 --> 00:00:09,243
in Book Three, Chapter Five,
that upon awakening,
3
00:00:09,277 --> 00:00:13,081
the Catalyst came
to an impasse but went forth,
4
00:00:13,114 --> 00:00:16,350
spreading the seeds
that hastened the salad days,
5
00:00:16,384 --> 00:00:19,820
and his name was
shouted to the skies.
6
00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:22,423
(Ileen Goldsmith's
"Life is Sweet")
7
00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:27,195
**
8
00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:32,533
* Things are gonna get worse *
9
00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:33,667
What?
10
00:00:35,736 --> 00:00:37,605
You!
11
00:00:37,638 --> 00:00:39,140
I know who you are...
12
00:00:39,173 --> 00:00:40,408
Oh, good. The doctors
were concerned
13
00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:42,243
about your memory retention.
14
00:00:42,276 --> 00:00:44,178
Oh, I remember
everything, Dave.
15
00:00:44,212 --> 00:00:46,680
Or should I say,
David Mountford?
16
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,649
Either.
It's up to you.
17
00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:50,284
(scoffs)
Oh, I don't think
18
00:00:50,318 --> 00:00:51,719
it's a good idea
for you to get up.
19
00:00:51,752 --> 00:00:54,155
Oh, well, then
that must mean
20
00:00:54,188 --> 00:00:56,590
that it is a good idea
for me to get up.
21
00:00:56,624 --> 00:00:58,792
The morphine's
got you confused.
22
00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:01,862
The morphine's got
nothin' to do with it.
23
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:04,198
I need to keep a clear head.
24
00:01:04,232 --> 00:01:06,867
Oh, my God!
Oh, no! This is insane!
25
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:08,369
No, no, no, it's okay--
the doctors just
26
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:10,171
shaved your head
for the CAT scan.
27
00:01:10,204 --> 00:01:12,473
It'll grow back.
Oh! But, good news.
28
00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:15,109
Sainsburys came back with
a much-increased offer.
29
00:01:15,143 --> 00:01:17,278
Seems your playing hardball
impressed them.
30
00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:19,513
Oh, right, because you
"set me up quite nicely."
31
00:01:19,547 --> 00:01:22,150
Your exact words, Dave.
32
00:01:22,183 --> 00:01:23,784
Seems you
tipped your hand.
33
00:01:23,817 --> 00:01:25,553
And it would've worked, too,
but the one thing
34
00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:30,158
you didn't count on
was the power of dreams.
35
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:32,393
The power of dreams?
36
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:35,396
Google LaBerge and DeGracia,
asshole!
37
00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:38,199
I know all about you
and your evil plan.
38
00:01:38,232 --> 00:01:40,568
Evil plan? But, uh,
Mr. Margaret--
39
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:42,436
Uh, Todd, uh, sir, uh...
Where's my...
40
00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:43,504
Mate!
41
00:01:43,537 --> 00:01:46,574
I have done nothing--
Oh, my...
42
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,842
All I've done
is try to help you.
43
00:01:48,876 --> 00:01:50,544
Jesus!
44
00:01:50,578 --> 00:01:52,246
You're fired.
45
00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:53,747
Wh--
No, no, no, no, no, no.
46
00:01:53,781 --> 00:01:56,250
Mr. Margaret, sir,
p-p-please don't do that.
47
00:01:56,284 --> 00:01:58,186
(near tears)
My father will be so upset.
48
00:01:58,219 --> 00:02:00,321
Dave, you can stop now.
49
00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:02,756
You don't have to slum with
the rest of us, all right?
50
00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:06,794
Just put your riding jodhpurs
on and regatta back to daddy.
51
00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:08,662
Hey, no, Mr.--
Mr. Margaret,
52
00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:10,498
I don't know what
I've done to upset you.
53
00:02:10,531 --> 00:02:13,401
I can-- I can make it
right, I-I promise.
54
00:02:13,434 --> 00:02:16,704
I-I put my job,
my career, on the line
55
00:02:16,737 --> 00:02:17,838
to get you the...
56
00:02:17,871 --> 00:02:18,806
(low voice)
you know what.
57
00:02:18,839 --> 00:02:20,674
Yeah...
58
00:02:20,708 --> 00:02:23,211
I did that because you
treated me as an equal.
59
00:02:23,244 --> 00:02:25,379
As though we were equals.
60
00:02:25,413 --> 00:02:27,448
That meant
the world to me.
61
00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:29,550
Ohh, did it?
Yes.
62
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:32,553
I just wanted
to learn from you,
63
00:02:32,586 --> 00:02:37,658
so... so, please,
don't fire me.
64
00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:39,827
Dave... come on.
65
00:02:39,860 --> 00:02:41,629
I'm sorry.
66
00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:42,830
(sighs)
Thank you.
67
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:45,466
Yeah... it's
gonna be all right.
68
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:46,334
There, there,
there you go!
69
00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:47,801
Yaaah ahh!
70
00:02:47,835 --> 00:02:51,805
Nighty-night,
ya backstabbing piece of shit.
71
00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:53,441
Why don't you go cry
in your castle?
72
00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,614
Excuse me, I'm looking
for Alice Bell.
73
00:03:00,648 --> 00:03:02,850
(whispering)
I gotta get out of this country.
74
00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:04,518
I gotta get to the airport.
75
00:03:10,424 --> 00:03:12,726
(cockney accent)
Ah, fuckin' yid bastard.
76
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:16,230
Uh, Paki, wog,
benefit-scrounging, gypsy,
77
00:03:16,264 --> 00:03:18,399
Romanian piece of shite.
78
00:03:18,432 --> 00:03:20,834
Ah, fuckin'... hell.
79
00:03:23,804 --> 00:03:25,706
I gotta get a taxi.
80
00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:27,741
I-- The dream.
Megathrax.
81
00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:30,811
I can't-- I can't have
any Megathrax on me.
82
00:03:30,844 --> 00:03:32,713
All right.
Right, okay.
83
00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:43,291
Sir! They're about
to operate on your daughter.
84
00:03:45,426 --> 00:03:47,461
What?
85
00:03:47,495 --> 00:03:49,663
I-I don't
have a daughter.
86
00:03:49,697 --> 00:03:50,698
Oh, my God.
87
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:51,799
You gotta
get in there quick!
88
00:03:51,832 --> 00:03:53,934
God knows
who they've got!
89
00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:56,470
Sir, the keys!
90
00:03:56,504 --> 00:03:57,671
Sorry.
Okay.
91
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:03,644
(engine starts,
tires screech)
92
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:09,883
(knock on door)
93
00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:11,652
Hello, hello, hello.
94
00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:13,787
(chuckling)
I'm Brent, this is Doug.
95
00:04:13,821 --> 00:04:15,656
Have you heard
the good news, neighbor?
96
00:04:15,689 --> 00:04:16,990
There is a prophet
who walks amongst us...
97
00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:18,692
(thunder sound effect plays)
98
00:04:18,726 --> 00:04:20,461
He's the one known
as the Catalyst.
99
00:04:20,494 --> 00:04:22,463
And through
his premonitions,
100
00:04:22,496 --> 00:04:25,399
he shall usher in
a new era, but first,
101
00:04:25,433 --> 00:04:27,568
he needs revivification,
uh--
102
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:28,902
(sound effects continue)
103
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:32,740
(crunching)
104
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:33,874
(thunder sounds fade)
105
00:04:33,907 --> 00:04:36,777
Can I ask, is it
the presentation
106
00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:38,946
in its entirety that
you took issue with,
107
00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:40,381
or just the audio portion?
108
00:04:42,049 --> 00:04:44,452
(sighs)
Fudge tickles!
109
00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:46,019
Really goofing
this thing up.
110
00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:48,356
I don't know about you,
but I'm getting on that comet
111
00:04:48,389 --> 00:04:49,490
one way or another,
even if I have to
112
00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:50,924
push the button myself.
113
00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:52,693
Ha, but that would
make you the Catalyst,
114
00:04:52,726 --> 00:04:54,728
and you are no Catalyst.
115
00:04:54,762 --> 00:04:56,830
Well, why not?
116
00:04:56,864 --> 00:04:59,400
We know that the Catalyst
doesn't know he's the Catalyst,
117
00:04:59,433 --> 00:05:01,101
thus proving that
I could be the Catalyst.
118
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,704
Uh, yeah, but you just said
that you could be the Catalyst,
119
00:05:03,737 --> 00:05:05,506
which means you aren't
the Catalyst,
120
00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:07,040
because the Catalyst does
not know he's the Catalyst,
121
00:05:07,074 --> 00:05:09,009
and you do know.
122
00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:10,344
Here's what we know.
123
00:05:10,378 --> 00:05:12,380
Nobody's stepping up
to be the Catalyst,
124
00:05:12,413 --> 00:05:15,048
so someone needs
to become the Catalyst.
125
00:05:15,082 --> 00:05:16,450
You see?
126
00:05:16,484 --> 00:05:18,719
It's a self-fulfilling,
uh, prophecy!
127
00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:20,421
You get it?
128
00:05:20,454 --> 00:05:23,691
Whoever has the vision
to become the Catalyst
129
00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:27,528
is, ipso facto,
the Catalyst.
130
00:05:27,561 --> 00:05:28,629
(man)
I'm in!
131
00:05:33,801 --> 00:05:35,936
(radio newscaster)
Alice Bell was attacked
by an American
132
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:38,105
at yesterday's
Garden Party rally,
133
00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:40,674
remains in critical condition
at Leeds Hospital.
134
00:05:40,708 --> 00:05:42,776
In related news,
Rupert Murdoch has taken
135
00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:45,579
to Twitter and SnapChat
to insist he is not,
136
00:05:45,613 --> 00:05:47,981
nor has he ever
been secretly, a Jew.
137
00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:49,850
(straining)
138
00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:06,467
(horn honking)
139
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:10,137
(panting)
Oh, no way.
140
00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:13,474
(horn honking)
141
00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:14,808
Okay!
142
00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,458
(tires screeching)
143
00:06:30,491 --> 00:06:32,460
(grunting)
144
00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:33,661
God...
145
00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:35,195
Uhh!
146
00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:36,997
Ohh!
(tires screeching)
147
00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:43,737
(Beethoven's "Ode to Joy")
148
00:07:06,894 --> 00:07:09,663
(alarm whooping,
steam hissing)
149
00:07:09,697 --> 00:07:11,832
Uhh!
150
00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:13,834
Ohh, this is...
151
00:07:17,204 --> 00:07:19,139
That's economics.
152
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:21,174
Ipso facto...
153
00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:22,643
I am the Catalyst.
154
00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:24,812
I'm sorry...
you said you didn't
155
00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:26,680
have the £300,000?
156
00:07:26,714 --> 00:07:29,116
Well, no, as the Catalyst,
157
00:07:29,149 --> 00:07:30,818
I thought that maybe
I'd get a discount.
158
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:32,886
And his sidekick.
159
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:33,821
You're not
the Catalyst.
160
00:07:33,854 --> 00:07:35,222
Too tall.
161
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:36,957
How about me?
Nooo.
162
00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:38,158
What about now?
163
00:07:38,191 --> 00:07:39,192
I'm terribly
sorry.
164
00:07:39,226 --> 00:07:41,028
That was very childish.
165
00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:42,596
Not only that,
166
00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:44,898
and this is a bit of a big one,
I'm afraid...
167
00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:48,669
you also have
blasphemed the Catalyst.
168
00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:50,270
(whispering)
And that's a big no-no.
169
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:53,707
So, you leave me
with no choice
170
00:07:53,741 --> 00:07:55,208
but to chastise you.
171
00:07:55,242 --> 00:07:57,945
(whispering)
Yes.
Oh, yeah.
172
00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:00,748
(ominous chanting)
173
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:06,019
**
174
00:08:09,857 --> 00:08:11,759
(muttering)
All right.
175
00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:13,727
Passport, passport.
176
00:08:24,672 --> 00:08:27,908
Pam... you're
in the bathtub, right?
177
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,943
(Pam)
Calm down...
I couldn't use mine.
178
00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:31,211
I sold it!
179
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:33,146
Don't care.
It's all yours.
180
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:34,114
Keep the toothbrush.
181
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:36,249
(sighs)
182
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:39,186
Hey!
183
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:41,288
Taxi!
184
00:08:41,321 --> 00:08:42,656
Um... um--
185
00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:45,626
It's not a dastar, mate.
It's a hat.
186
00:08:45,659 --> 00:08:47,094
Nope. Go, go.
187
00:08:48,829 --> 00:08:50,831
(sighs)
188
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:51,832
Oh! Taxi, come on!
189
00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:56,136
In or out?
190
00:08:56,169 --> 00:08:57,337
What's the verdict?
191
00:08:57,370 --> 00:09:00,173
Nope, nope, nope!
192
00:09:00,207 --> 00:09:01,174
Yo!
193
00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:05,679
(sighs)
194
00:09:07,314 --> 00:09:08,982
(cockney accent)
I ain't got all day, mate.
195
00:09:10,117 --> 00:09:11,084
Right.
196
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,155
Heathrow, please.
197
00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:16,890
Goin' on holiday,
are ya?
198
00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:20,027
No, I am going home.
199
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,629
'Bout as good a time
as any, right?
200
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:24,031
What with that
Megathrax outbreak.
201
00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,633
What?
Haven't you 'eard?
202
00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:26,900
Megathrax was released.
203
00:09:26,934 --> 00:09:29,302
They reckon it
must've been a terrorist.
204
00:09:29,336 --> 00:09:31,371
I didn't go inside
The Molecule.
205
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,974
Yeah, that's the name
of the place-- "The Molecule."
206
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,342
But I made sure
when I left the hospital
207
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:37,110
I didn't have
any Megathrax on me.
208
00:09:37,144 --> 00:09:38,812
I know I didn't.
Oh, just go.
209
00:09:38,846 --> 00:09:39,880
Hurry, hurry, please!
210
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:41,915
(cell phone ringing)
211
00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:44,151
(speaking Korean)
212
00:09:50,658 --> 00:09:52,359
(chuckling)
Sorry, mate.
213
00:09:52,392 --> 00:09:53,894
My wife wants me
to pick up some nuts.
214
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:56,063
I knew it was you!
215
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,931
Oh, God, stop this car.
216
00:09:57,965 --> 00:10:00,033
God, you know,
I thought maybe
217
00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:01,802
it wasn't 'cause of, you know,
the whole... eye thing.
218
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:03,637
But just let me out.
Anywhere! Let me out!
219
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:06,907
(grunting)
Okay... here!
220
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:08,008
(muttering)
221
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,180
Taxi...
222
00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:14,882
No, you!
223
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,717
Hey, hey!
Stop, stop, stop!
224
00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:18,351
(rickshaw creaks)
225
00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:20,353
Heathrow Airport.
226
00:10:20,387 --> 00:10:22,690
Heathrow Airport!
Step on it! Go!
227
00:10:28,028 --> 00:10:32,032
Brother Wilts...
Brother Whitney...
228
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:34,201
(ominous chanting)
229
00:10:34,234 --> 00:10:38,005
For the misdemeanor of
pretending to be the Catalyst,
230
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:42,776
you are hereby duty bound
to receive your chastisement.
231
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:49,817
If you're gonna
act like children,
232
00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:51,218
we're gonna treat you
like children.
233
00:10:58,025 --> 00:11:00,127
(man)
Flipping heck,
it's not taking.
234
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:02,863
Ohh. Have you checked
the HDMI port?
235
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:04,932
Oh, maybe it's an "S" cable.
...lasted.
236
00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:06,466
Oh, yeah, that's it.
And there was a surprise
237
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,836
in the art world today
as Pam Woods,
238
00:11:08,869 --> 00:11:11,872
a virtual unknown,
won the Turner Prize
239
00:11:11,905 --> 00:11:15,075
for "My Bathroom,"
a gritty, grounded piece
240
00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:18,078
that displays her bathroom
in all its embarrassing glory.
241
00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:20,147
Wet towels,
filthy toothbrushes,
242
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,082
empty booze bottles,
fag butts,
243
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,785
used condoms, worn panties,
244
00:11:24,818 --> 00:11:26,754
revealing that she
is as insecure
245
00:11:26,787 --> 00:11:29,222
and imperfect as the rest
of the world.
246
00:11:29,256 --> 00:11:30,457
How is that art?
247
00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:32,492
What an absolute
load of rubbish.
248
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,294
Back now to our top story.
249
00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:36,897
Police have released
CCTV footage
250
00:11:36,930 --> 00:11:39,366
of a suspicious man
seen at the location
251
00:11:39,399 --> 00:11:42,369
where the vial of Megathrax
was released.
252
00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:43,971
The Megathrax
has been released?
253
00:11:44,004 --> 00:11:45,372
The plague!
The seeds have spread.
254
00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:47,474
It's begun.
255
00:11:47,507 --> 00:11:49,977
Now wait, wait, wait-- let's not
get ahead of ourselves.
256
00:11:50,010 --> 00:11:51,879
We all know what didn't
happen to those amateurs
257
00:11:51,912 --> 00:11:53,747
in Heaven's Gate.
258
00:11:53,781 --> 00:11:55,515
Police are looking
for this man.
259
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:56,416
Pause it!
260
00:11:58,385 --> 00:12:00,520
He has come.
261
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:01,454
The Ca'alyst!
The Ca'alyst!
Shh!
262
00:12:01,488 --> 00:12:05,425
I have to admit,
the resemblance is uncanny.
263
00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:06,960
Martin,
get the wood cuttin'.
264
00:12:06,994 --> 00:12:08,762
(muffled protests)
265
00:12:08,796 --> 00:12:11,231
Wait! He's saying
he knows who that man is.
266
00:12:11,264 --> 00:12:12,766
(muffled speech)
Don't worry.
267
00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:13,934
I can understand you
perfectly.
268
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:15,836
I'm a dentist.
(high-pitched grunting)
269
00:12:15,869 --> 00:12:18,038
Well, yeah,
I could do that,
270
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:19,940
but the point is that
I can understand you perfectly,
271
00:12:19,973 --> 00:12:20,808
so I don't need
to take it out.
272
00:12:20,841 --> 00:12:23,143
(whining grunting)
273
00:12:23,176 --> 00:12:25,012
There's no need to use
that kind of language!
274
00:12:25,045 --> 00:12:26,446
Neville, stop showing off
275
00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:27,948
and take the fun ball
out of his mouth.
276
00:12:27,981 --> 00:12:29,016
Fine.
277
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:30,250
Mm!
278
00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:32,085
(pop)
Mm! Uhh!
279
00:12:32,119 --> 00:12:34,221
The man on TV, his name
is Todd Margaret.
280
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:35,956
We work together.
281
00:12:35,989 --> 00:12:37,891
He just got in from Portland
week before last.
282
00:12:37,925 --> 00:12:40,227
He journeyed
across land and sea.
283
00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:41,962
(muffled grunting)
284
00:12:43,363 --> 00:12:45,799
No! No, man,
that's not Todd.
285
00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:47,968
He-- he's got, like,
hair a-and a goatee.
286
00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:49,236
(Doug)
No, no, no.
287
00:12:49,269 --> 00:12:50,470
He shaved it off last week
288
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:52,806
to go visit
the Houses of Parliament.
289
00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:54,541
He visi'ed
the rule-makers.
290
00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:56,009
Why'd he go
to the House of Parliament?
291
00:12:56,043 --> 00:12:57,477
Well, he dropped a ton
of Thunder Muscle
292
00:12:57,510 --> 00:13:00,580
from a helicopter and left
a huge hole in Hertfordshire!
293
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:02,015
(Neville)
He did rise up
294
00:13:02,049 --> 00:13:04,017
and unleash
a bolt of energy
295
00:13:04,051 --> 00:13:06,820
so that nature and space
were altered.
296
00:13:06,854 --> 00:13:08,255
(whispering)
This sounds like a nightmare.
297
00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:09,957
(Doug)
No, no, no,
that's the best bit.
298
00:13:09,990 --> 00:13:12,826
He's afraid
of his dreams!
299
00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:14,261
(all laughing)
300
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:15,328
(Doug)
He's afraid
301
00:13:15,362 --> 00:13:17,030
they might actually...
302
00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:19,933
c-come... t-true.
303
00:13:21,534 --> 00:13:24,071
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
304
00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:27,140
The Catalyst is Dave!
The Catalyst is me!
305
00:13:27,174 --> 00:13:28,441
No, you idiots.
306
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,543
The Catalyst is...
307
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:37,217
(both)
Todd Margaret.
308
00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:38,485
Elementary!
309
00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:40,353
And you say
you know this person?
310
00:13:40,387 --> 00:13:42,122
Yes!
Doug...
311
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:44,858
you are still "Seg One."
312
00:13:44,892 --> 00:13:46,459
You need to get
to the bank, ASAP.
313
00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:47,527
Yes, sir.
314
00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:49,029
(Rev. Goody)
Wilts...
315
00:13:49,062 --> 00:13:51,865
go and find the Catalyst
and bring him to us.
316
00:13:51,899 --> 00:13:53,433
Absolutely!
Of course.
317
00:13:53,466 --> 00:13:57,104
But first, let's...
let's take care of this.
318
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:59,506
Okay? So get the ball gag
back in, and...
319
00:13:59,539 --> 00:14:01,174
Who was first?
Who is it? Was it Monty?
320
00:14:01,208 --> 00:14:02,575
No, Phillip,
do not cut in line.
321
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:06,513
All right, good.
Here.
322
00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:07,948
All right, we're good.
323
00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:08,949
(sighs)
324
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:13,153
176. Thank you.
325
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:15,222
Hi, uh, I need a ticket
326
00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:17,290
on the next flight
to Portland, Oregon.
327
00:14:17,324 --> 00:14:18,358
Okay.
328
00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:25,632
Next, please.
329
00:14:25,665 --> 00:14:28,235
(sighs)
330
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:29,970
(indistinct crowd chatter)
331
00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:32,005
(sighs)
332
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:35,008
I need you
to look at me.
333
00:14:35,042 --> 00:14:36,209
Can't see your face.
334
00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:39,146
Sorry...
I dropped a... oop!
335
00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:45,252
Sir, I need you
to look at me,
336
00:14:45,285 --> 00:14:48,421
or I can't
see your face.
337
00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:49,522
No, no.
338
00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:51,424
Can you please
not smile?
339
00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:53,560
I just need you
to look at me.
340
00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:55,062
Here I am.
341
00:14:55,095 --> 00:14:57,597
It's the guy
on the... thing.
342
00:14:57,630 --> 00:14:59,566
Ooh, okay.
You've changed.
343
00:14:59,599 --> 00:15:01,468
Oh, yes, I was--
I used to be younger.
344
00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:04,504
Yeah, so I aged
a little bit,
345
00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:07,941
and I, uh...
radiation...
346
00:15:07,975 --> 00:15:10,677
uh, leakage...
the, um, alopecia--
347
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:13,146
What was the purpose
of your visit?
348
00:15:13,180 --> 00:15:15,315
Bus-- pleasure.
349
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:17,985
Bu-- uh, pl-- just
pleasurable business.
350
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:19,719
Ya know, I mean,
I-- I-- I came here
351
00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:22,622
for s-some business,
but I try to have fun.
352
00:15:22,655 --> 00:15:26,026
So, uh, uh, I went o--
I took a walk,
353
00:15:26,059 --> 00:15:28,061
saw a horse,
I went to a strip club.
354
00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:29,362
(chuckling)
No shame in that, right?
355
00:15:29,396 --> 00:15:31,264
Ya know, uh--
I mean, just check out
356
00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:33,433
some of your fine
English ladies.
357
00:15:33,466 --> 00:15:34,968
Although most of them
are Eastern European, right?
358
00:15:35,002 --> 00:15:37,237
Right.
Probably sex slaves.
359
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,106
But I'm not judging.
There's no judgment at all.
360
00:15:39,139 --> 00:15:40,373
Okay, did you visit
I just, yeah...
361
00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:42,075
anywhere else
while you were here?
362
00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:43,476
Uh, just Leeds.
363
00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:44,211
Leeds?
I--
364
00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:46,313
Uh, that's not a crime,
to go...
365
00:15:46,346 --> 00:15:48,315
I mean, not a crime,
but you can--
366
00:15:48,348 --> 00:15:50,383
I can move freely
within the country,
367
00:15:50,417 --> 00:15:52,052
I would imagine, yeah.
So, uh, so, yeah.
368
00:15:52,085 --> 00:15:53,753
You're asking me
if I went anywhere else.
369
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:55,155
Yes, I did, I want
to be honest with you.
370
00:15:55,188 --> 00:15:56,489
I went to Leeds.
So there it is.
371
00:15:56,523 --> 00:15:58,458
It's all up front.
I went to Leeds, England.
372
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:00,327
Y-You know, it's Yorkshire,
it's beautiful country.
373
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:02,162
It's up north.
Have you been? It's great.
374
00:16:02,195 --> 00:16:04,397
I'm from there originally.
Are you?
375
00:16:04,431 --> 00:16:06,099
Yeah, well,
originally-originally.
376
00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:07,434
Well, my dad's
from there.
377
00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:09,769
Was from there.
He's dead. He died.
378
00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:11,704
Uh, but, you know,
we had, uh,
379
00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:13,306
fish and chips together
a lot.
380
00:16:13,340 --> 00:16:15,075
You know, with The Who.
381
00:16:15,108 --> 00:16:17,244
Uh, not all the time.
Just on Saturdays.
382
00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:19,379
It's just a--
a great part of England.
383
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:21,481
You really should try
to make it up there sometime.
384
00:16:21,514 --> 00:16:24,084
* The green hills
of Yorkshire *
385
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:26,086
* Buh-buh-buh-bum-bum
bum-buh-buh-buh-buh *
386
00:16:26,119 --> 00:16:28,055
* Bum-bum-bum-bum-bum bum,
buh-bum-bum-bum *
387
00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:29,456
* The green...
388
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:31,424
I won't do the whole thing.
No, don't.
389
00:16:31,458 --> 00:16:33,193
I-In summation, I...
(chuckling)
390
00:16:33,226 --> 00:16:35,228
Yes, I went to Leeds.
My dad is dead.
391
00:16:35,262 --> 00:16:36,529
God rest his peace.
392
00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:37,764
I'm just trying
to go... home.
393
00:16:37,797 --> 00:16:40,100
I just gotta get past you,
and I'm home free.
394
00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:42,369
Go back to Portland,
where I'm from, you know,
395
00:16:42,402 --> 00:16:44,737
where I live, where my--
where my girlfriend is.
396
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,706
You know, where--
where my Fanny is.
397
00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:48,675
No, I know that means
something diff--
398
00:16:48,708 --> 00:16:50,710
Not my vagina.
Like, it's a cat.
399
00:16:50,743 --> 00:16:52,412
My-- My-- Uh, it's--
400
00:16:52,445 --> 00:16:54,614
I just want to get back to
my girlfriend, my pussy cat,
401
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,716
my pu-- her puss...
(laughing) I'm a--
402
00:16:56,749 --> 00:17:00,520
I'm a guy, I'm a red-blooded
heterosexual... male.
403
00:17:00,553 --> 00:17:03,423
So, yes, two pussies
all around.
404
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:05,058
Right.
(laughing)
It's not a p--
405
00:17:05,092 --> 00:17:07,060
I don't understand what
this line of questioning is.
406
00:17:07,094 --> 00:17:09,362
(email chimes)
It seems a bit much, sir.
407
00:17:09,396 --> 00:17:10,763
This is honestly
a bit much.
408
00:17:10,797 --> 00:17:13,566
Your Honor, I object
to all this, well-sustained.
409
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,702
You know, I just--
I am--
410
00:17:15,735 --> 00:17:16,569
Good. Go.
411
00:17:16,603 --> 00:17:18,071
Uh...
412
00:17:18,105 --> 00:17:19,106
Enjoy your flight.
413
00:17:32,152 --> 00:17:34,454
Give me a pint...
o-of anything.
414
00:17:34,487 --> 00:17:36,423
I don't care. That.
415
00:17:36,456 --> 00:17:38,191
I'm sorry, but I have
to see some ID.
416
00:17:38,225 --> 00:17:40,527
(indistinct PA announcement)
417
00:17:44,631 --> 00:17:46,299
Turkish coffee, please.
418
00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:48,067
(cell phone vibrating)
419
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:53,706
There you go.
420
00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:55,808
A pint of no return.
421
00:17:55,842 --> 00:17:59,112
(pilot)
May I... look
at your passport?
422
00:17:59,146 --> 00:18:02,449
Sorry, I'm writing a book
about American passports.
423
00:18:02,482 --> 00:18:04,384
You know, something
to read on the loo.
424
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,153
It will be fun to
look at this book.
425
00:18:06,186 --> 00:18:07,687
(breathes)
Oh, God, no.
426
00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:11,824
Well, it's not to everyone's
taste, I suppose.
427
00:18:11,858 --> 00:18:13,393
(bartender)
Where are you flying
to today, Achmed?
428
00:18:13,426 --> 00:18:14,761
Portland, Oregon.
429
00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:16,129
At least, I hope.
430
00:18:16,163 --> 00:18:17,797
You think
your flat stinks.
431
00:18:17,830 --> 00:18:20,600
Well, here's a story from
Portland, Oregon, in America.
432
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:22,669
112 people
found themselves homeless
433
00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:24,671
when their entire
building was condemned
434
00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:28,575
after one tenant's decomposing
cat attracted various animals,
435
00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:29,909
which then attacked
and killed each other.
436
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,511
(bartender)
Really?
437
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:32,679
(Achmed)
Yeah, apparently the smell
438
00:18:32,712 --> 00:18:34,314
was visible
from outer space.
439
00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:35,248
(bartender)
Well, he certainly
440
00:18:35,282 --> 00:18:36,483
caused quite a stink.
441
00:18:36,516 --> 00:18:37,517
(chuckling)
Yes.
442
00:18:39,386 --> 00:18:41,388
(PA bell pings,
cell phone buzzes)
443
00:18:41,421 --> 00:18:43,523
(man)
Flight 127 to Portland, Oregon,
444
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:45,258
is now boarding at Gate 6.
445
00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:46,759
(sighs)
446
00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:49,429
Todd, it's David.
447
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:50,763
What is going on?
448
00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:53,300
I-I don't know
what I've done
449
00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:54,901
to make you turn on me
like that.
450
00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:58,171
But... you've drugged me,
451
00:18:58,205 --> 00:18:59,706
you've called me names,
452
00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:03,543
and you have even
ruined my trousers.
453
00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:05,178
Don't you have
anything to say?
454
00:19:05,212 --> 00:19:06,713
Yeah.
455
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:08,448
They're called pants,
asshole.
456
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,383
Flight 127 to...
457
00:19:10,417 --> 00:19:12,585
Oh!
458
00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:13,686
He's at the airport.
459
00:19:15,355 --> 00:19:17,557
Ms. Purity...
460
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:19,559
Really s-sorry
for the loss.
461
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:27,434
I can't believe
she's dead.
462
00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:28,935
Oh, God.
463
00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:31,204
It's okay.
464
00:19:31,238 --> 00:19:32,672
She's with Hitler now.
465
00:19:34,407 --> 00:19:35,275
Thank you.
466
00:19:37,310 --> 00:19:38,811
That Todd Margaret's
gonna pay for this.
467
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:39,812
Yeah, we'll
kill him.
468
00:19:46,753 --> 00:19:48,955
Father, it's David.
469
00:19:48,988 --> 00:19:52,292
Yeah, I need a man from
the Civil Aviation Authority,
470
00:19:52,325 --> 00:19:54,727
someone from
the U.S. embassy...
471
00:19:54,761 --> 00:19:57,697
Oh, yes, and I'm gonna need
the family helicopter.
472
00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:03,936
(seatbelts snapping)
473
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:07,574
(sighs)
474
00:20:07,607 --> 00:20:08,875
(chuckles softly)
475
00:20:21,488 --> 00:20:22,889
Mr. Todd Margaret?
476
00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:24,291
Will you come with me,
please?
477
00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:40,840
I believe you were given
the wrong seating assignment.
478
00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:44,744
(muffled opera music playing)
479
00:20:44,777 --> 00:20:46,346
Oh, yes.
480
00:20:46,379 --> 00:20:47,246
Thank you. Right.
481
00:20:50,550 --> 00:20:51,651
Paper, sir?
(seatbelt snaps)
482
00:20:57,023 --> 00:20:58,391
(engines humming)
483
00:20:58,425 --> 00:21:00,593
(bell pings)
484
00:21:00,627 --> 00:21:02,829
(man)
Flight attendants,
please prepare for takeoff.
485
00:21:02,862 --> 00:21:04,564
(Johnny Marr's "Life is Sweet")
486
00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:07,800
* Life is short
and the days are long *
487
00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:09,035
* Gotta get right back
where I don't belong *
488
00:21:09,068 --> 00:21:11,404
(pinging)
489
00:21:11,438 --> 00:21:13,473
(man)
Ladies and gentleman,
this is your captain.
490
00:21:13,506 --> 00:21:15,308
We've been informed that
there is an unaccounted-for bag
491
00:21:15,342 --> 00:21:18,645
in the hold that originated
from a Portland flight.
492
00:21:18,678 --> 00:21:20,913
We need to taxi back
to the gate and deplane
493
00:21:20,947 --> 00:21:23,049
while it is checked out.
494
00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:24,016
Sorry about that.
495
00:21:24,050 --> 00:21:25,452
(engines dying)
496
00:21:25,485 --> 00:21:29,021
Are you fucking kidding me?!
497
00:21:29,055 --> 00:21:32,625
(Ileen Goldsmith's
"Life is Sweet")
498
00:21:41,901 --> 00:21:44,771
* If I know what I need
499
00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:47,106
* Without reservation
500
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:49,409
* Life's too sweet
501
00:21:49,442 --> 00:21:51,511
* A real sensation
502
00:21:51,544 --> 00:21:53,980
* Can't control myself
503
00:21:54,013 --> 00:21:56,749
* Anticipation
504
00:21:56,783 --> 00:22:01,488
* Things are gonna get worse *
505
00:22:01,521 --> 00:22:04,624
Okay, almost
certainly nothing,
506
00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:06,025
but we have found
a suspect package,
507
00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:08,628
and we are
going to blow it up.
508
00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:10,997
Okay, ready, in five, five,
509
00:22:11,030 --> 00:22:15,435
four, four,
three, two...
510
00:22:15,468 --> 00:22:17,370
(explosion)
511
00:22:18,938 --> 00:22:20,373
See there?
512
00:22:20,407 --> 00:22:22,375
That's why
we're the best.
513
00:22:22,409 --> 00:22:23,643
Best in the world.
514
00:22:25,945 --> 00:22:26,813
(coins jingling)
35530
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