All language subtitles for Mary Tyler Moore s04e15 Happy Birthday Lou
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1
00:00:08,910 --> 00:00:12,370
Who can turn the world on with her
smile?
2
00:00:15,770 --> 00:00:22,290
Who can take a nothing day and suddenly
make it all seem worthwhile?
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00:00:22,490 --> 00:00:25,690
Well, it's you, girl, and you should
know it.
4
00:00:26,210 --> 00:00:32,590
With each glance and every little
movement you show it. Love is all alone,
5
00:00:32,590 --> 00:00:37,650
need to waste it. You can never tell,
why don't you take it?
6
00:01:04,460 --> 00:01:06,340
I'm giving Gordy a raise.
7
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:08,120
Oh, Mr. Grant, isn't that nice?
8
00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:09,359
No, it's not.
9
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:12,400
I know Channel 6 is looking for another
weatherman. I don't want to lose him.
10
00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:14,120
Anything for me?
11
00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:17,280
Yeah. A couple of cards, as a matter of
fact. What's the occasion?
12
00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:19,640
Anything else?
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00:01:19,760 --> 00:01:20,760
No, that's good.
14
00:01:22,580 --> 00:01:24,280
This looks like birthday cards to me.
15
00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:26,840
Oh, Murray, I bet you're right.
16
00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:28,960
Well, it's certainly easy enough to
check.
17
00:01:30,180 --> 00:01:31,139
All right.
18
00:01:31,140 --> 00:01:33,160
Everybody who wants a chuckle, gather
around.
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00:01:34,340 --> 00:01:35,440
Just gather around.
20
00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:40,960
Murray, for as long as I've known you,
you've made a habit of putting me down.
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00:01:41,340 --> 00:01:43,380
You enjoy making a fool of me, don't
you?
22
00:01:43,960 --> 00:01:45,080
Look at it this way, Ted.
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00:01:45,540 --> 00:01:46,800
Someone has to do it.
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00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,820
I'd like to see you try something out.
Go ahead. Just start something.
25
00:01:51,060 --> 00:01:52,060
Okay, Ted.
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00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:56,280
I think your newscast last night... Shut
up, Curly.
27
00:02:05,910 --> 00:02:07,090
fall people jokes.
28
00:02:09,550 --> 00:02:10,550
What's that book?
29
00:02:11,530 --> 00:02:13,850
Heckler Stoppers and One Line Toppers.
30
00:02:14,090 --> 00:02:18,850
I sent away for it. Hey, Murray, you
were right. Today is Mr. Grant's
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00:02:19,210 --> 00:02:20,810
Oh, yeah? How old is he?
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00:02:21,050 --> 00:02:25,150
Well, let's see. He was born in 1925,
so... I'll get it.
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00:02:25,730 --> 00:02:28,210
I said I'll get it, Mary.
34
00:02:30,430 --> 00:02:32,370
Well, I can't get it if you're going to
stare at me.
35
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That's what I had.
36
00:02:37,650 --> 00:02:40,110
Why do you suppose he didn't want us to
know that this is his birthday?
37
00:02:40,370 --> 00:02:41,490
He sure was secretive.
38
00:02:42,070 --> 00:02:43,470
Maria just thought of something.
39
00:02:43,910 --> 00:02:48,350
This is his first birthday since...
You're right. Since what?
40
00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:50,770
Since he separated from Mrs. Grant.
41
00:02:51,190 --> 00:02:54,110
I mean, they were together all those
years. Oh, this has to be a really
42
00:02:54,110 --> 00:02:57,210
depressing time for him. I know, I think
you're right, Mary. And Lou isn't the
43
00:02:57,210 --> 00:03:01,550
kind that wants people feeling sorry for
him. Oh, I know, and I just feel so
44
00:03:01,550 --> 00:03:02,850
sorry for him.
45
00:03:04,970 --> 00:03:07,370
go in and tell him some of these jokes
you do for old people.
46
00:03:08,630 --> 00:03:09,630
Let's see.
47
00:03:10,410 --> 00:03:12,990
You're so old that your wrinkles have
wrinkles.
48
00:03:14,750 --> 00:03:16,450
These are old people jokes.
49
00:03:16,710 --> 00:03:19,950
I really don't think they're going to
cheer Mr. Grant up. I've got to go in
50
00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:21,710
there and talk to him about Gordy's
raise anyway.
51
00:03:22,430 --> 00:03:23,750
Why is Gordy getting a raise?
52
00:03:24,410 --> 00:03:27,810
Well, because Mr. Grant doesn't want to
take any chances of losing him to
53
00:03:27,810 --> 00:03:28,689
another station.
54
00:03:28,690 --> 00:03:29,990
Why aren't I getting a raise?
55
00:03:36,430 --> 00:03:39,570
Say, Gordy, I just recommended you for a
raise.
56
00:03:41,070 --> 00:03:43,830
Thanks, Steve. There's no need to thank
me. You deserve it. The weather's been
57
00:03:43,830 --> 00:03:44,830
very good lately.
58
00:03:48,590 --> 00:03:50,810
I need your signature on this.
59
00:03:51,170 --> 00:03:52,170
Okay, Mary.
60
00:03:52,830 --> 00:03:54,670
Mr. Grant, could I say something
personal?
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00:03:55,370 --> 00:03:56,370
I guess so.
62
00:03:56,830 --> 00:03:57,830
Happy birthday.
63
00:04:08,650 --> 00:04:14,490
Every year, my mother sends me $25 and
says to get myself something nice with
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00:04:14,490 --> 00:04:17,130
it. I used to go out and get myself a
suit.
65
00:04:17,370 --> 00:04:19,010
Now I go out and get myself a steak.
66
00:04:20,550 --> 00:04:21,550
Where's the other one from?
67
00:04:21,850 --> 00:04:22,870
One of my daughters.
68
00:04:23,370 --> 00:04:28,350
This little fluffy cottontail is hopping
right your way to wish you lots of love
69
00:04:28,350 --> 00:04:30,050
and joy this very special day.
70
00:04:30,890 --> 00:04:35,710
Well, it's the sort, you know. She
didn't write it. She bought it.
71
00:04:41,550 --> 00:04:44,870
Every morning he goes to the office and
writes little fluffy cotton tales.
72
00:04:45,590 --> 00:04:49,270
Probably. Then at night he goes home and
kicks his dog through a hedge.
73
00:04:51,850 --> 00:04:54,230
So, uh, what are you going to do about
your birthday?
74
00:04:54,570 --> 00:04:58,950
It doesn't matter what I do about my
birthday. It's just like any other day.
75
00:04:59,430 --> 00:05:01,910
Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Year's.
76
00:05:02,710 --> 00:05:05,290
Don't you have any plans for your
birthday?
77
00:05:05,610 --> 00:05:06,630
I don't plan things, Mary.
78
00:05:07,050 --> 00:05:09,610
I just like to let things happen. I like
to be spontaneous.
79
00:05:09,910 --> 00:05:11,050
Call me Madcap.
80
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:12,440
But that's the way I am.
81
00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:22,800
Ready, Mayor? Oh, no, Rhoda, I can't go
to lunch today. There's just too much to
82
00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,460
arrange for Mr. Grant's surprise party.
83
00:05:24,780 --> 00:05:25,780
Anybody go to lunch?
84
00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:29,280
Uh, no, um, but why don't you go, Mr.
Grant?
85
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:30,459
Where's Murray?
86
00:05:30,460 --> 00:05:31,560
Oh, he went to lunch already.
87
00:05:32,280 --> 00:05:34,400
Oh, I guess I'm not that hungry after
all.
88
00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:39,220
Mary, tell me again, why are you doing
this?
89
00:05:41,410 --> 00:05:44,550
lonely, Rhoda. I mean, I'm sure that's
why he didn't want us to know that today
90
00:05:44,550 --> 00:05:45,549
is his birthday.
91
00:05:45,550 --> 00:05:48,830
So everybody wouldn't get sentimental
and make a fuss and embarrass him.
92
00:05:48,850 --> 00:05:52,450
Exactly. So you're going to get
sentimental and make a fuss and
93
00:05:52,790 --> 00:05:54,930
Yes. No, I don't think I'm going to.
94
00:05:55,370 --> 00:05:58,870
Rhoda, I just can't stand the thought of
him celebrating his little birthday all
95
00:05:58,870 --> 00:06:03,230
alone. So, you going to help me? Sure,
I'll help you. Stop off on your way home
96
00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:04,009
from work.
97
00:06:04,010 --> 00:06:08,890
Get some, let's see, club soda. Right.
Yeah, and ginger ale. What is this? Oh,
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00:06:08,890 --> 00:06:09,729
large cake.
99
00:06:09,730 --> 00:06:13,740
Oh, yeah. About a gallon. of ice cream.
And I'll just have coffee. Lou, can I
100
00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:14,740
get you anything from that?
101
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:17,960
Hey, Rosen,
102
00:06:18,460 --> 00:06:20,800
Mary has to stay here. You want to go
out for lunch?
103
00:06:22,180 --> 00:06:23,400
Okay. Why not?
104
00:06:23,940 --> 00:06:25,400
There you are, Lou.
105
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:27,600
I taught you.
106
00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:29,040
Hi, Sue Ann.
107
00:06:29,580 --> 00:06:34,000
Do you wear your sleeves rolled up
because you know what wonderful arms you
108
00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:35,000
have?
109
00:06:38,320 --> 00:06:40,760
I just keep them up so I don't get any
stuff on them.
110
00:06:43,180 --> 00:06:48,680
I don't know about you, but I find
shyness in a man irresistible.
111
00:06:50,100 --> 00:06:54,100
Don't tell me the happy homemaker has
eyes for Lou. I think so.
112
00:06:54,340 --> 00:06:56,300
Well, he meets all her requirements.
113
00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:59,340
He's a U .S. citizen between 18 and 65.
114
00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:04,580
You don't have to lean on that jacket.
Let me get that for you.
115
00:07:05,540 --> 00:07:07,240
You simply take your ordinary...
116
00:07:09,020 --> 00:07:15,140
Wrap it around your hand, and then the
lint is gone.
117
00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:19,080
It's nice not to have any lint.
118
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,780
So, where are you eating lunch?
119
00:07:23,140 --> 00:07:29,680
Oh, no place fancy. A joint I know, run
by an ex -mess sergeant.
120
00:07:29,820 --> 00:07:33,360
I always go there on Friday because it's
special as catfish and chili.
121
00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:42,240
prepare tomorrow's show.
122
00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:44,300
It's a salute to poultry.
123
00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:46,040
Uh,
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00:07:47,780 --> 00:07:51,440
yeah. Okay, uh, come on, Rona. Okay,
Lou.
125
00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:53,620
But listen, I am on a diet.
126
00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:56,500
Do you think they have catfish with
cottage cheese?
127
00:07:58,120 --> 00:07:59,180
So long, son.
128
00:08:00,060 --> 00:08:06,020
Isn't it funny how hyper -masculine men
feel threatened by very feminine women?
129
00:08:06,580 --> 00:08:08,260
Gee, I hadn't noticed that.
130
00:08:10,030 --> 00:08:11,030
I threaten a lot of them.
131
00:08:12,750 --> 00:08:15,250
So, how are things on the Happy
Homemaker set?
132
00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:17,670
Oh, glories. We're taping a special.
133
00:08:18,050 --> 00:08:23,010
So far today, I've poached Merrill,
rendered lard, and coddled an egg.
134
00:08:24,090 --> 00:08:26,010
It's a full life, isn't it, Sue Ann?
135
00:08:27,170 --> 00:08:29,350
Listen, I don't want to keep you or
anything.
136
00:08:29,870 --> 00:08:31,630
What are you going to give Lou for his
birthday?
137
00:08:32,549 --> 00:08:34,210
How did you know it was his birthday?
138
00:08:34,510 --> 00:08:35,830
Oh, a little bird told me.
139
00:08:46,519 --> 00:08:47,860
something super special.
140
00:08:48,140 --> 00:08:51,380
Well, I don't know how super special
it's going to be, but I am going to give
141
00:08:51,380 --> 00:08:52,380
him a surprise party.
142
00:08:52,920 --> 00:08:57,660
Terrific! You just get him to your place
and I'll do the rest. And Mary, I
143
00:08:57,660 --> 00:09:02,060
promise you, I can show you a thousand
and one tricks that can turn any
144
00:09:02,060 --> 00:09:03,380
gathering into an affair.
145
00:09:06,360 --> 00:09:08,300
I'll just bet you can.
146
00:09:09,980 --> 00:09:12,160
I'll see you at your place at 7 .30.
147
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,820
Right now, I have to go stuff a duck.
148
00:09:58,990 --> 00:10:00,930
Listen, I just want you to understand. I
understand.
149
00:10:01,870 --> 00:10:03,510
I mean, it's perfectly natural.
150
00:10:04,070 --> 00:10:05,950
A lot of people feel depressed on their
birthday.
151
00:10:07,270 --> 00:10:08,730
How did you know it was my birthday?
152
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I remember.
153
00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:13,250
Last year this time, I wished you a
happy birthday, Lou, and you didn't
154
00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:20,090
me, so... I'd rather no one else knew
about it. Well, you can trust me, Lou. I
155
00:10:20,090 --> 00:10:21,130
know a little about tact.
156
00:10:23,730 --> 00:10:25,050
How's it feel to be pushing 50?
157
00:10:28,709 --> 00:10:29,870
lump in my throat.
158
00:10:30,090 --> 00:10:31,590
Now, look on the bright side, Lou.
159
00:10:31,990 --> 00:10:35,390
These are the golden years, the twilight
of a happy life.
160
00:10:36,370 --> 00:10:39,370
I'll remember that. Days dwindle down to
a precious few.
161
00:10:40,550 --> 00:10:42,010
September, October.
162
00:10:44,050 --> 00:10:46,650
I think maybe I've been cheered up
enough for one day.
163
00:10:47,110 --> 00:10:48,890
You know, when you think about it, it's
incredible.
164
00:10:49,210 --> 00:10:51,870
Two -thirds of your life shot just like
that.
165
00:11:04,110 --> 00:11:05,110
You shouldn't have.
166
00:11:05,150 --> 00:11:07,350
Don't get embarrassed. It's nothing
fancy.
167
00:11:10,190 --> 00:11:13,450
Well, what brings you down to the old
newsroom?
168
00:11:14,110 --> 00:11:16,930
Well, I wanted to wish you a happy
birthday and give you your present.
169
00:11:17,130 --> 00:11:18,610
I knew you'd be going out later.
170
00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:22,650
Well, you just didn't happen by because
you were in the neighborhood.
171
00:11:23,130 --> 00:11:26,290
Come on. Of course not. I wanted to give
you your present.
172
00:11:26,830 --> 00:11:28,730
This is your husband you're talking to.
173
00:11:29,030 --> 00:11:31,110
Come on, Edie. I know you.
174
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Lou.
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00:11:32,470 --> 00:11:37,140
You came here to... flirt, didn't you? I
came to give you your present. No, no,
176
00:11:37,180 --> 00:11:40,520
listen. I know when you're flirting.
You're flirting, right? I am not
177
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:44,160
Come on, come on. I know you're
flirting. Come on.
178
00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:46,280
I know when you're flirting. Come on.
179
00:12:26,830 --> 00:12:27,830
I didn't see you do that.
180
00:12:28,830 --> 00:12:30,290
Why did you go kitschy -kitschy -coo?
181
00:12:30,490 --> 00:12:32,370
All right, Gordy, all right, drop it.
182
00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:35,470
Lou, it's just kind of a hard subject to
drop.
183
00:12:35,710 --> 00:12:38,750
You know, it's not every day that a
guy's boss walks over to him and says, I
184
00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:40,990
don't want you to say anything about me
going kitschy -kitschy -coo.
185
00:12:41,370 --> 00:12:43,410
Good night, Gordy. Good night, Lou.
186
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:44,750
Good night, Edie.
187
00:12:45,270 --> 00:12:47,150
Lou, I know what you mean.
188
00:12:47,610 --> 00:12:50,910
I won't say anything to anybody about
you going kitschy -kitschy -coo.
189
00:12:51,710 --> 00:12:53,350
Can I tell them that you said kitschy?
190
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:12,100
You know, you can still hug me when I
give you a present.
191
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,040
Yeah, I don't know I can still hug you.
192
00:13:15,960 --> 00:13:16,960
You want to?
193
00:13:17,140 --> 00:13:18,140
In a newsroom?
194
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:19,360
There's no one here.
195
00:13:23,300 --> 00:13:24,300
Okay.
196
00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:18,040
But a rotten dip.
197
00:14:20,300 --> 00:14:23,100
What is the theme of this gathering?
198
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:26,160
Oh, uh, happy birthday, I guess.
199
00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:28,920
Oh, Mary, that's so humdrum.
200
00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:30,940
Let's come up with a theme.
201
00:14:31,300 --> 00:14:33,200
Our decor should say something.
202
00:14:33,760 --> 00:14:34,760
Maybe...
203
00:14:47,630 --> 00:14:50,250
trade on the theme. Say, here's an
inspiration.
204
00:14:50,670 --> 00:14:55,210
Last month, one of my viewers asked for
help with her grandfather's 80th
205
00:14:55,210 --> 00:14:56,210
birthday.
206
00:14:56,670 --> 00:14:58,850
I suggested a kiddie party.
207
00:14:59,350 --> 00:15:00,950
A kiddie party.
208
00:15:01,370 --> 00:15:04,790
Don't you love it? We blew in the face
of time.
209
00:15:05,190 --> 00:15:10,370
All the old timers got lollipops and
balloons, played musical chairs, wore
210
00:15:10,370 --> 00:15:11,370
at the table.
211
00:15:11,510 --> 00:15:14,630
Tell me, how did Grandpa feel when they
put him up on the pony to get his
212
00:15:14,630 --> 00:15:15,630
picture taken?
213
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:28,979
We agreed.
214
00:15:28,980 --> 00:15:31,420
I told you I was just going to have one
drink and then I'd be going.
215
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:34,580
Well, yeah, but you didn't tell me you
were coming ten minutes early.
216
00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:39,020
What's that got to do with it? Well, I
didn't give the scotch a chance to
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breathe.
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Mary, I want to thank you.
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Oh, no, it was just... No, no, not for
the drink.
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We're not having a party for me in the
office today.
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I know there was talk about getting me a
cake and champagne, and, well, I just
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00:15:54,940 --> 00:15:56,560
want to thank you for heading it off.
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Oh, Mr. Grant, don't...
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You wish me many happy returns. I said
thank you. What else is there? Well,
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on, sit down.
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It's Friday night.
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I'm alone.
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You're alone.
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00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:11,040
Hey, I really want to be alone.
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Mary, are you going to have a party for
me?
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No.
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Why do you ask?
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Because I hate parties and I hate being
surprised.
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So, of course, you can imagine how I
feel about surprise parties.
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You got it.
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It's funny how the bell should ring just
as we're talking about surprise
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00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:36,300
parties. Yes, it is.
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Oh, come on, Mary. The surprise is over.
This was our rotten trick, Gordy. What
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00:17:34,740 --> 00:17:38,680
are you telling me for? How could you do
this, Gordy? I didn't. This was a lousy
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thing to do.
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I'm leaving.
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Oh, Mr. Graham, please.
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Let him go. Who wants him?
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You shouldn't have talked her into this.
Now I want to get out. Now wait, wait.
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Listen, I'll tell you what.
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We'll just let Murray in.
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reason to keep me stuck out in the hall.
That's no reason, no reason at all,
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Lou. Here's your present. Happy
birthday.
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You know, so I'm really, I'm just, you
know, totally in sympathy with you
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But, Mr. Grant, why are you doing this
to me?
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00:20:59,710 --> 00:21:05,830
I mean, look, I am a person who lives
all her life trying to avoid scenes, you
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00:21:05,830 --> 00:21:12,110
know? And there are 24 people out there
ready to bash down my door just because
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I want to give you a little party.
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Forget it, Mary.
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We can have a good time with just us.
Right, Lou?
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You think I enjoy doing this to you?
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00:21:24,620 --> 00:21:27,760
I know how horrible this evening is to
you.
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00:21:28,340 --> 00:21:31,900
I know how horrible it is for all those
people out on the stairs.
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00:21:33,380 --> 00:21:37,440
But I can't stand it, Mary. I really
can't. You can't stand what?
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00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:40,360
Any demonstration of affection.
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00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:44,140
I don't know how to handle it.
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00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:47,220
How to respond to it.
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I never have.
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It's a big problem for me.
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Mary? I'm sorry.
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00:21:57,050 --> 00:22:02,490
Mary, can't you just go out there and
explain to them how I hate this sort of
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thing and tell them to go away?
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00:22:04,010 --> 00:22:06,570
No, I can't do that. I invited them
here.
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00:22:07,510 --> 00:22:09,630
Mr. Grant, I'm really sorry.
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00:22:10,150 --> 00:22:13,410
Hey, Mary, you have nothing to apologize
for. That's right. You worked pretty
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00:22:13,410 --> 00:22:15,770
hard for this party. And you know why,
Lou?
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Because she didn't want you to be alone
on your birthday.
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Look, Lou.
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I want you to know I'm not going to lay
any guilt on you because that's what my
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00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:25,940
mother always does to me, and I hate it.
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00:22:26,820 --> 00:22:33,380
But if she were here, my mother would
say, Lou, do what you want.
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00:22:34,060 --> 00:22:38,200
It doesn't make any difference if you
are ripping out the hearts of those who
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love you.
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00:22:40,940 --> 00:22:42,280
That makes sense, Lou.
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I'll let him in.
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00:24:15,350 --> 00:24:16,350
You said you would have.
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They threw a surprise party for me.
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