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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,500 --> 00:00:08,420 Ma, in between your world tours, we see each other once in a while. Let's have 2 00:00:08,420 --> 00:00:09,259 some fun. 3 00:00:09,260 --> 00:00:10,260 You're right. 4 00:00:12,180 --> 00:00:13,880 But you're really looking for a girl. 5 00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:15,019 Yes, ma. 6 00:00:15,020 --> 00:00:18,820 And you really want to get married again. Yes, ma. And you have nothing 7 00:00:18,820 --> 00:00:23,240 grandchildren. No, ma. Ma, you started this discussion on the courthouse steps 8 00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:24,360 the day I got my divorce. 9 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:27,600 Will you drop the subject? 10 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:30,140 All right, the subject is solved. 11 00:00:30,840 --> 00:00:31,880 More coffee? 12 00:00:33,070 --> 00:00:35,890 You ask him if he found a nice girl yet? Subject is open. 13 00:00:37,270 --> 00:00:39,210 We were just talking about that. 14 00:00:39,450 --> 00:00:44,910 Mrs. Madison, I'm the last guy in the world to nag or meddle in somebody 15 00:00:44,910 --> 00:00:47,170 business. Believe me, I'm not that kind. 16 00:00:48,730 --> 00:00:53,890 But it breaks my heart to know that this wonderful son of yours doesn't have a 17 00:00:53,890 --> 00:00:54,890 nice, steady girlfriend. 18 00:00:55,250 --> 00:00:56,510 Well, he says he goes out. 19 00:00:56,770 --> 00:00:58,150 Doesn't he date nice girls? 20 00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:01,750 The nicest girl he ever brought up here stole my watch. 21 00:01:03,910 --> 00:01:08,110 Oscar! I, on the other hand, date a very lovely girl, lives right in this 22 00:01:08,110 --> 00:01:12,110 building, Miriam, Miriam Welby. She holds down a very responsible position. 23 00:01:12,810 --> 00:01:14,950 I see my ex -wife from time to time. 24 00:01:15,250 --> 00:01:18,290 Our relationship is amicable. I wish it were more than that. 25 00:01:21,210 --> 00:01:24,370 I have a full, satisfying life. Me too. 26 00:01:25,169 --> 00:01:28,890 You two what? Me too, on the other hand. I met a very nice girl I've been 27 00:01:28,890 --> 00:01:30,070 seeing. I don't tell you everything. 28 00:01:30,450 --> 00:01:33,970 When? Who? What? You don't know her. Why didn't you tell us? Oh, that's 29 00:01:33,970 --> 00:01:37,530 wonderful. When are we going to meet her? I don't know. Saturday night. 30 00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:38,930 night. All four of us will go out. 31 00:01:39,150 --> 00:01:45,790 Let's do that. Let's do that. Call her. Call her. Call her, Chickie. My Chickie. 32 00:01:46,310 --> 00:01:47,910 Chickie. Call her. 33 00:01:48,270 --> 00:01:49,970 Make your mother happy. 34 00:01:50,170 --> 00:01:51,109 Call her. 35 00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:52,130 Call her, Chickie. 36 00:01:58,260 --> 00:01:59,119 Hello, honey. 37 00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:01,920 Oscar. Listen, I was wondering if you were busy Saturday night. 38 00:02:02,140 --> 00:02:02,999 Son of a gun. 39 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,000 Yeah. 40 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:05,160 Ma? 41 00:02:06,420 --> 00:02:08,160 You'll never talk to girls in front of me. 42 00:02:08,780 --> 00:02:09,780 I'll go freshen up. 43 00:02:10,259 --> 00:02:12,600 Isn't it a wonderful feeling? Well, my mother's in town. 44 00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:16,060 Yes. How could you have a girl without me knowing about her? 45 00:02:16,460 --> 00:02:17,460 Who is it? 46 00:02:17,860 --> 00:02:19,320 Let me just talk to her. 47 00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:24,300 Hello? This is Felix Unger. Oscar Madison's probably told you a million 48 00:02:24,300 --> 00:02:25,300 about... What? 49 00:02:26,540 --> 00:02:28,160 The correct time is 1 .13. 50 00:02:28,660 --> 00:02:32,500 That is right. 51 00:02:39,940 --> 00:02:44,240 On November 13th, Felix Unger was asked to remove himself from his place of 52 00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:45,240 residence. 53 00:02:45,780 --> 00:02:47,860 That request came from his wife. 54 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:53,040 Deep down, he knew she was right, but he also knew that someday he would return 55 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:54,040 to her. 56 00:02:54,570 --> 00:02:58,290 With nowhere else to go, he appeared at the home of his friend, Oscar Madison. 57 00:02:58,810 --> 00:03:02,750 Several years earlier, Madison's wife had thrown him out, requesting that he 58 00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:03,750 never return. 59 00:03:04,530 --> 00:03:08,410 Can two divorced men share an apartment without driving each other crazy? 60 00:03:56,510 --> 00:03:58,990 The odd couple was filmed in front of a live audience. 61 00:04:02,970 --> 00:04:05,710 Chickie, I can't wait to meet your girlfriend Saturday night. 62 00:04:06,030 --> 00:04:07,030 Bye -bye, dear. 63 00:04:07,190 --> 00:04:08,190 Bye -bye, honey. I'll see you then. 64 00:04:10,590 --> 00:04:12,110 I'd be good and ashamed. 65 00:04:15,130 --> 00:04:17,209 Lying to a mother who calls you Chickie. 66 00:04:19,089 --> 00:04:22,510 I lied because you backed me into a corner. Oh, it's my fault. 67 00:04:22,790 --> 00:04:23,790 Yeah. 68 00:04:31,020 --> 00:04:32,020 Used coffee? 69 00:04:32,660 --> 00:04:33,660 Don't help me. 70 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:37,940 My mother goes on world tours worrying about me in 26 countries. 71 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:40,840 Every tour guide in Asia knows I'm not married. 72 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:42,920 She's trying to help you. 73 00:04:43,140 --> 00:04:46,180 She enrolled me in a lonely hodge club in Istanbul. 74 00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:50,760 Last week in the mail I got a sheep's head with I love you written along its 75 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:51,760 neck. 76 00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:54,800 So what are you going to tell her Saturday night when you don't have a 77 00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,380 that going to make her happy? I'll find somebody. Who, who? 78 00:04:57,740 --> 00:04:58,740 I was thinking of Mary. 79 00:04:59,140 --> 00:05:00,750 Mary? With the tattoo? 80 00:05:03,050 --> 00:05:04,430 You know about the tattoo? 81 00:05:04,670 --> 00:05:06,270 She dresses to feature it. 82 00:05:06,750 --> 00:05:08,170 How about Peter? Oh, good. 83 00:05:08,530 --> 00:05:10,030 Maybe she'll bring my watch back. 84 00:05:11,090 --> 00:05:15,290 Oh, but I will. That's all you're for. You're the cooler, cooler, cooler. 85 00:05:15,530 --> 00:05:16,489 You're right. 86 00:05:16,490 --> 00:05:20,330 I pushed you. I know I did. I'm sorry. Let me make it up to you. You'll move 87 00:05:20,330 --> 00:05:21,330 out? 88 00:05:22,670 --> 00:05:26,170 Let me find your girl. Oh, yeah. No, no. I'll find someone your mother will be 89 00:05:26,170 --> 00:05:30,330 crazy about. I can do it. I'm a natural -born matchmaker. All the great matches 90 00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:31,109 I predicted. 91 00:05:31,110 --> 00:05:33,790 John and Yoko, Liz and Richard. I knew it was going to happen. 92 00:05:34,630 --> 00:05:35,990 Give me a girl. I'll give you a guy. 93 00:05:36,610 --> 00:05:37,610 Jane Fonda. 94 00:05:37,750 --> 00:05:38,750 Don DeLuise. 95 00:05:39,950 --> 00:05:41,110 Don DeLuise? 96 00:05:41,430 --> 00:05:42,510 Give me a hard one. 97 00:05:42,790 --> 00:05:45,070 Give me a guy. I'll give you a girl. Oscar Madison. 98 00:05:45,610 --> 00:05:46,610 Raquel Welch. 99 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:51,080 You won't do this at this game. You see, I know your taste. Well, she may not be 100 00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:55,580 available, but now I... Oh, wait, no, wait, no. I promise you I'll have a girl 101 00:05:55,580 --> 00:05:56,580 here. 102 00:06:24,810 --> 00:06:26,690 I wonder where he can be. Come in, come in, come in. Sit down. 103 00:06:27,410 --> 00:06:28,410 Make yourself comfortable. 104 00:06:29,210 --> 00:06:31,750 I'll bet he's in the kitchen, cooking dinner. 105 00:06:32,110 --> 00:06:37,950 He's a wonderful cook. He's just an all -around goner. And his cleaning is every 106 00:06:37,950 --> 00:06:41,270 bit as good as his cooking. It's just... What are you doing? 107 00:06:42,130 --> 00:06:43,310 I'm cleaning the countertop. 108 00:06:44,090 --> 00:06:45,090 On my floor? 109 00:06:45,650 --> 00:06:48,330 What's that terrible odor in here? Hey, hey, hey! 110 00:06:48,570 --> 00:06:49,650 Hey, hey, hey! 111 00:06:50,190 --> 00:06:52,870 Shh, shut it down. Not too loud. Well, it's not a cake I'm making. 112 00:06:53,450 --> 00:06:54,450 What are you making? 113 00:06:55,050 --> 00:06:56,050 It's a casserole. 114 00:06:57,610 --> 00:06:58,670 We'll talk about it later. 115 00:06:59,410 --> 00:07:00,410 I've got a girl here. 116 00:07:00,890 --> 00:07:02,430 Oh, well, I'll get out of here. No, no. 117 00:07:04,170 --> 00:07:05,170 Well, she's for you. 118 00:07:05,650 --> 00:07:06,790 Oh, for me? Yeah. 119 00:07:09,870 --> 00:07:10,990 Hey, she's a doll. 120 00:07:11,270 --> 00:07:12,290 She is a lady. 121 00:07:12,550 --> 00:07:13,550 What'd you pick her up? 122 00:07:14,310 --> 00:07:18,310 I didn't pick her up, as you so elegantly put it. I met her. 123 00:07:18,530 --> 00:07:21,310 Where? What does it matter where I met her? I met her. If it doesn't matter, 124 00:07:21,390 --> 00:07:22,390 tell me where. 125 00:07:22,860 --> 00:07:24,040 I met her at the doctor's office. 126 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,000 Oh, she got. 127 00:07:26,220 --> 00:07:27,220 Oh, come on. 128 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:31,300 You don't want to meet her. I do want to meet her. She's cute. I'm going to 129 00:07:31,300 --> 00:07:33,600 introduce you. Now act like a gentleman. I will. Don't worry. 130 00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:37,400 Here we are. 131 00:07:37,940 --> 00:07:43,520 I want you to meet one of the most brilliant, clever, intelligent, 132 00:07:44,220 --> 00:07:48,240 personable guys it's ever been my great good fortune to know. 133 00:07:48,660 --> 00:07:49,660 Hi, want a beer? 134 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:50,800 No, thanks. 135 00:07:53,260 --> 00:07:57,700 I'm sorry, Doris Atkins? This is Oscar Madison. Hello. Nice to meet you. Nice 136 00:07:57,700 --> 00:07:58,700 meet you. 137 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:01,160 Well, I have to go to the movies. 138 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:03,560 Yes, I'll be there. 139 00:08:04,660 --> 00:08:05,660 Where are you going? 140 00:08:05,980 --> 00:08:07,660 Just going to get some fruit to take to the show. 141 00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:09,460 I'm not here. I'm not here. 142 00:08:12,460 --> 00:08:13,720 Well, what kind of work do you do? 143 00:08:14,100 --> 00:08:15,400 Oh, I'm a music teacher. 144 00:08:15,740 --> 00:08:18,100 I teach violin and piano. Isn't that wonderful? 145 00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:21,540 Now, what do you do, Oscar? 146 00:08:21,860 --> 00:08:22,860 Oh, I'm a sports writer. 147 00:08:23,210 --> 00:08:24,590 Oh, that's right. Felix told me. 148 00:08:24,950 --> 00:08:27,570 That must be very exciting. It is exciting. 149 00:08:27,810 --> 00:08:28,930 It's terrifically exciting. 150 00:08:29,570 --> 00:08:30,570 Very exciting. 151 00:08:32,850 --> 00:08:34,549 Tell him about your music education. 152 00:08:34,990 --> 00:08:37,710 Oh, he doesn't want to hear about that. I certainly do. 153 00:08:37,950 --> 00:08:39,490 Yes, I certainly do. Well, 154 00:08:40,789 --> 00:08:41,789 I went to... 155 00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:00,260 here. Yeah, it's Oscar. 156 00:09:01,900 --> 00:09:05,240 You notice she makes the same sound I do? 157 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:09,260 No, I didn't hear you. Listen, have you ever tried this stuff? 158 00:09:09,460 --> 00:09:12,640 The doctor gave me this, and it's been terrifically effective. Oh, no, I took 159 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:13,640 that fish yesterday. 160 00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:15,940 Yeah, that's pretty good. It's almost the same stuff. 161 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:17,200 I have this, too. 162 00:09:18,420 --> 00:09:20,900 Now, this is for stuffiness, and this is for pain. 163 00:09:22,260 --> 00:09:23,480 For sneezing. 164 00:09:23,700 --> 00:09:24,700 Watch out. 165 00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:34,860 common, don't we? Yeah. 166 00:09:35,980 --> 00:09:39,340 I bet you wouldn't be interested in seeing my vaporizer. 167 00:09:42,580 --> 00:09:43,900 Yeah, I'd love to. 168 00:09:44,100 --> 00:09:45,100 All right. 169 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:50,780 I think you'll agree it's a beauty. 170 00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:58,500 I just... I was just making a gesture of friendship. That's all it was. 171 00:09:59,460 --> 00:10:01,560 Oscar claims I brought the girl home for myself. 172 00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:05,180 Poor girl was clogged. I had to do something. 173 00:10:08,540 --> 00:10:12,560 He won't even talk to me now. He's gone out to a single bar. Can you imagine 174 00:10:12,560 --> 00:10:13,560 that? 175 00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:17,520 The thing is, I found the perfect girl for him today. 176 00:10:18,620 --> 00:10:21,340 Felix, am I the black or the white? 177 00:10:26,900 --> 00:10:27,900 You're black, Murray. 178 00:10:28,620 --> 00:10:32,180 I just can't seem to get the hang of this game. You're doing fine. You're 179 00:10:32,180 --> 00:10:35,350 fine. I'm a whiz at casino and goldfish. 180 00:10:36,790 --> 00:10:38,670 Don't leave. You're getting hot, Murray. 181 00:10:38,930 --> 00:10:40,290 I gotta go. 182 00:10:40,810 --> 00:10:42,430 I gotta find my badge. 183 00:10:44,050 --> 00:10:45,730 I left it someplace. 184 00:10:47,330 --> 00:10:48,330 Oh, hi, Oscar. 185 00:10:48,430 --> 00:10:49,069 Hi, Murray. 186 00:10:49,070 --> 00:10:50,330 I found a badge in a hole. 187 00:10:51,570 --> 00:10:52,570 Thanks. 188 00:10:52,770 --> 00:10:55,590 Aren't you gonna ask Oscar if he found a date for Saturday night? 189 00:10:55,950 --> 00:10:58,890 Well, yeah. How'd you do it? Did you get a girl for Saturday night? No, I came 190 00:10:58,890 --> 00:11:02,370 up empty. I'm no good at picking up girls anymore. It's a whole new world. 191 00:11:02,680 --> 00:11:04,020 Everybody's liberated but me. 192 00:11:05,180 --> 00:11:07,300 Wouldn't it be ironic if our friend Mr. 193 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:11,680 Madison came slithering back, begging me to fix him up with a date? 194 00:11:12,140 --> 00:11:16,160 I gave Mr. Runger a chance. I ended up at the movies with a bag of fruit. 195 00:11:17,560 --> 00:11:22,480 All right, I made a mistake, but I learned something from it. And now, now 196 00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:26,380 found the perfect girl for him. I don't want to hear about it. But Murray does. 197 00:11:26,420 --> 00:11:27,420 Murray, sit down. Murray, listen. 198 00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:34,770 This afternoon, this very afternoon, mind you, A wonderful Greek family came 199 00:11:34,770 --> 00:11:37,390 my studio. They wanted to have their portraits made. 200 00:11:38,090 --> 00:11:41,970 In this family, there was a beautiful daughter. 201 00:11:42,210 --> 00:11:43,850 Her name was Helen. 202 00:11:45,270 --> 00:11:46,470 What's that you say? 203 00:11:46,830 --> 00:11:48,630 Yes, just like Helen of Troy. 204 00:11:49,110 --> 00:11:50,270 I didn't say. 205 00:11:50,470 --> 00:11:54,290 A lovely, dark girl with gleaming eyes. 206 00:11:55,370 --> 00:11:57,330 Elenia. Elenia. 207 00:12:00,310 --> 00:12:05,240 So I told them. this wonderful woman of the island, about my roommate Oscar. 208 00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:10,960 I can still see the way her warm, moist, eager mouth formed his name. 209 00:12:12,060 --> 00:12:13,060 Oscar. 210 00:12:13,860 --> 00:12:14,860 Oscar. 211 00:12:16,060 --> 00:12:18,180 They were made for each other. 212 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,280 And his mother would love her. 213 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:21,800 But no. 214 00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:27,140 Through that door on Saturday night is going to walk a mother who could be made 215 00:12:27,140 --> 00:12:29,580 happy in 26 different countries. 216 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:31,540 But for a selfish son. 217 00:12:31,860 --> 00:12:35,280 All right, Phoenix, call the girl. What is that idea? You know what you're 218 00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:37,240 hearing? He's talking to me. 219 00:12:37,660 --> 00:12:39,900 Congratulations. You made a very wise choice. 220 00:12:40,620 --> 00:12:44,880 I'll tell you something. What? Your mother is very lucky that her son has me 221 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:47,300 a friend. Yeah, but don't make a dumb of a date with Sally. I want to meet her 222 00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:50,200 first. Leave it to me. Leave everything in my table. 223 00:12:55,580 --> 00:12:58,380 Another job well done. 224 00:12:59,850 --> 00:13:00,990 By your man in blue. 225 00:13:02,210 --> 00:13:03,650 Hey, this isn't my bed. 226 00:13:05,570 --> 00:13:07,630 Some dumb cop lost his bed. 227 00:13:18,310 --> 00:13:19,310 Forget it, Felix. 228 00:13:19,470 --> 00:13:22,350 Are you introducing me to her? I take her right out for coffee. Something like 229 00:13:22,350 --> 00:13:24,610 that. No, no, Felix. Exactly like that. 230 00:13:24,890 --> 00:13:27,770 Oscar, you just can't grab the girl and leave. You've got to meet the entire 231 00:13:27,770 --> 00:13:31,630 Damascopoulos family. All right, I'll meet the entire Damascopoulos family, 232 00:13:31,630 --> 00:13:32,630 went out for coffee. 233 00:13:32,750 --> 00:13:36,450 You've got to talk to them. You're going to love sitting and talking with them. 234 00:13:36,470 --> 00:13:39,610 They're old world people. They're charming. They're a fun group. Believe 235 00:13:39,650 --> 00:13:41,190 you're going to love them. Hello, Felix. 236 00:13:41,510 --> 00:13:42,710 Oh, Mr. 237 00:13:42,970 --> 00:13:46,410 Madison, I recognize you from the newspaper. 238 00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:49,470 Welcome to my company. 239 00:13:50,250 --> 00:13:56,680 This is the... Famous American sports newspaper writer, Oscar Madison. 240 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:57,639 How are you? 241 00:13:57,640 --> 00:13:58,660 Felix, we know everybody. 242 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,000 Califere Filimu. Good. 243 00:14:01,580 --> 00:14:03,080 This is my saint mother. 244 00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:04,520 How are you? 245 00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:05,680 That's my father. 246 00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:06,880 How do you do, sir? 247 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,080 He's resting. 248 00:14:09,420 --> 00:14:11,180 And that's my son, Andrea. 249 00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:13,060 He's a sponge diver. 250 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:14,800 Sponge diver? 251 00:14:14,860 --> 00:14:17,680 Well, since we moved to New York, he doesn't work that much. 252 00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:20,460 But maybe you could help him. 253 00:14:20,750 --> 00:14:23,030 Oh, I'm sorry. Most of my friends are in foam rubber. 254 00:14:23,430 --> 00:14:24,430 Oh, no, no, no. 255 00:14:25,050 --> 00:14:28,110 He's going to be a wrestler. He's very strong. 256 00:14:28,570 --> 00:14:31,350 Sit. Sit down. Sit down. Go ahead. Oh, no, no. 257 00:14:31,750 --> 00:14:32,750 One, 258 00:14:32,970 --> 00:14:34,030 two, three, go! 259 00:14:35,490 --> 00:14:36,990 One, two, three, go! 260 00:14:37,590 --> 00:14:40,810 You're very strong. You're going to be a very good wrestler. 261 00:14:41,070 --> 00:14:42,210 How do you turn this guy off? 262 00:14:42,730 --> 00:14:44,730 And sit down. 263 00:14:47,770 --> 00:14:48,770 Nothing. 264 00:14:50,060 --> 00:14:51,460 And that's my jewel. 265 00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:55,120 My lovely daughter, Elena. 266 00:14:55,900 --> 00:14:57,980 Very nice to meet you. 267 00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:01,680 Go sit. 268 00:15:08,900 --> 00:15:12,900 He likes you. 269 00:15:31,790 --> 00:15:33,350 just like in Greece. 270 00:15:39,230 --> 00:15:40,230 Excuse me. 271 00:15:40,510 --> 00:15:41,930 I'll show you something. 272 00:15:42,890 --> 00:15:46,810 Would you like to go out for some coffee? What the hell? We have a nice 273 00:15:46,810 --> 00:15:47,810 here. That's right. 274 00:15:48,110 --> 00:15:50,250 Home fun is the best fun. 275 00:15:50,470 --> 00:15:51,470 The family album. 276 00:15:52,170 --> 00:15:55,310 Gather around. Take a chair, family. Look at this. 277 00:15:55,610 --> 00:15:57,250 Oh, nice. 278 00:15:58,870 --> 00:15:59,870 Who's that? 279 00:16:00,190 --> 00:16:01,190 That's Andreas. 280 00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:05,420 He's played that. Ah, you see, Oscar? Yeah. Tearing the arms off his teddy 281 00:16:07,740 --> 00:16:09,940 Would you like to go out for a walk? I don't know. 282 00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:13,420 Is she going to go get a coat? 283 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:15,420 No, that's the end of the meeting. 284 00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:19,220 We make first meeting short to make next meeting longer. 285 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:23,520 Very nice meeting you all, and I hope to see you again very soon. Don't go. 286 00:16:24,780 --> 00:16:27,360 We don't need the internet to enjoy ourselves. 287 00:16:27,700 --> 00:16:30,900 Well, it's a lot better than arm wrestling. Oscar, look, look. Here's a 288 00:16:30,900 --> 00:16:31,900 of the whole family. 289 00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:36,240 Well, oh, but we start the scrapbooks from the middle. No, no, no. Sit down. 290 00:16:36,460 --> 00:16:38,280 We'll start at the beginning. 291 00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:40,860 Sit down. Look at the scrapbooks. Helix. 292 00:16:42,420 --> 00:16:43,420 Helix. 293 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:45,720 Etch, lay, and scray. 294 00:17:13,290 --> 00:17:14,450 It means you didn't get a date. 295 00:17:14,710 --> 00:17:16,210 Your tie looks adorable. 296 00:17:17,170 --> 00:17:18,170 Great news. 297 00:17:18,750 --> 00:17:20,690 Mr. Doublest Couple has called me at the studio. 298 00:17:20,950 --> 00:17:22,990 He invited us to his restaurant tonight. 299 00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:24,810 So? 300 00:17:25,250 --> 00:17:28,490 Well, Helen will be there. You can introduce her to your mother. 301 00:17:28,750 --> 00:17:29,770 How? In Panama? 302 00:17:30,010 --> 00:17:31,470 I don't even know if the girl can talk. 303 00:17:31,850 --> 00:17:35,170 Please, my mother knows I'd never go for a girl like that. Oscar, what is the 304 00:17:35,170 --> 00:17:36,650 matter with you? Come along. 305 00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:40,550 The worst thing that could happen is that you'd have a good time. Oh, sure. 306 00:17:40,550 --> 00:17:41,550 have a great time. 307 00:17:41,790 --> 00:17:44,630 I'll say, Mom, this is Helen. Her father will go like that next thing you know. 308 00:17:44,670 --> 00:17:46,210 I got an old man sleeping on my shoulder. 309 00:17:47,010 --> 00:17:49,590 What are you going to tell your mom? I'm going to tell her the truth, Phoenix. I 310 00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:51,910 don't have a steady girl. I may never get married. Hold your voice. She has to 311 00:17:51,910 --> 00:17:54,290 face the fact. No, I'm going to tell her right now. Hi, Chicky. 312 00:17:54,570 --> 00:17:55,770 Oh, hi, Phoenix. 313 00:17:56,290 --> 00:17:58,790 Where are we going tonight with your young lady? That's what I'm going to 314 00:17:58,790 --> 00:18:01,950 you, Mom. Where is she? I'm dying to be here. I was up all night thinking about 315 00:18:01,950 --> 00:18:04,590 it. That's what I want to tell you, Mom. Go ahead. Tell her. Tell me what? 316 00:18:06,390 --> 00:18:07,950 How would you like to go to a Greek restaurant? 317 00:18:58,620 --> 00:19:00,500 Wonderful. Old American toast. 318 00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:02,360 Bottoms up. 319 00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:04,380 What is that? 320 00:19:04,700 --> 00:19:05,760 It's Greek. It means good luck. 321 00:19:06,180 --> 00:19:07,180 Nice. 322 00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:11,060 It is weird, Helen. We've been here an hour and my mother thinks I made her up. 323 00:19:11,540 --> 00:19:12,980 Is anything wrong, Mr. Madison? 324 00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:16,780 No, no. We're having a wonderful time. Thank you. 325 00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:19,040 What's the matter with you? 326 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,060 These are old world customs. You don't offend people. 327 00:19:22,420 --> 00:19:25,180 Mr. Madison, your mother is beautiful. 328 00:19:27,050 --> 00:19:29,710 Oh, I just love Greek food. We had it in Hawaii. 329 00:19:30,630 --> 00:19:32,250 Another toast for Mrs. 330 00:19:32,490 --> 00:19:33,490 Manson. 331 00:19:33,950 --> 00:19:35,270 Yashu. Yashu. 332 00:19:35,850 --> 00:19:36,850 Good health. 333 00:19:38,590 --> 00:19:42,710 I have to say two words now to the band. They are all relatives. 334 00:19:44,710 --> 00:19:47,890 Oscar, where's Emma? She'll be here in a minute. Listen, I want to tell you 335 00:19:47,890 --> 00:19:49,090 something about it. What, what? 336 00:19:49,470 --> 00:19:53,390 Well, you know, you're used to seeing me with talkative girls. She's very shy 337 00:19:53,390 --> 00:19:54,830 and very quiet. 338 00:19:55,050 --> 00:19:56,050 Well, quiet is nice. 339 00:19:56,550 --> 00:19:57,670 Quiet is beautiful. 340 00:19:57,950 --> 00:20:00,150 Now we dance. Are you dancing, too? 341 00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:06,470 Is 342 00:20:06,470 --> 00:20:15,750 that 343 00:20:15,750 --> 00:20:16,429 me today? 344 00:20:16,430 --> 00:20:17,089 Go ahead. 345 00:20:17,090 --> 00:20:20,470 It's okay. I saw it in Zorba the Greek. Not okay. I saw the boys in the band. 346 00:21:47,340 --> 00:21:49,220 and I've only seen you dance with men. 347 00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:50,540 Oh, we're having a lot of fun. 348 00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:57,740 Mr. Mudson, Mrs. Mudson, Felix Unger, I want you 349 00:21:57,740 --> 00:22:00,660 to meet my daughter. Oh, it's a mess. 350 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:02,000 Everybody! 351 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:05,300 My lovely daughter Ellen! 352 00:23:35,970 --> 00:23:36,970 Thank you. 353 00:24:01,450 --> 00:24:05,090 This was so exciting after I once got used to this. 354 00:24:05,670 --> 00:24:08,810 My name is Aristus, but you can call me Ari. 355 00:24:09,010 --> 00:24:14,110 Oh, Ari, you're a nice man. My name is Elizabeth, and you can call me Betsy. 356 00:24:14,310 --> 00:24:18,790 dear lady Betsy, you made this evening wonderful. 357 00:24:19,690 --> 00:24:24,330 You sure are nice and quiet, but not when you dance. We're going to dance a 358 00:24:24,490 --> 00:24:26,450 Say my name again, will you? 359 00:24:27,150 --> 00:24:28,530 Oscar. Yeah. 360 00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:31,120 You want a den? 27842

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