All language subtitles for Melrose Place s07e03 Match Made in Hell

Ooh, Megan.

Welcome. Hello, Reverend.

We're ready for the ceremony. Thank you
for fitting us into your busy schedule.

No problem.

Follow me.

Lexi.

What's going on?

We're getting married. You can't marry
her.

You have to marry me.

For the money. I need the money.

Lexi, you're making a scene. They have a
plane to catch. Our honeymoon is in

Hawaii and you're ruining everything.

No.

Oh, my God.

No.

Don't worry, my child.

It will be quick and painless.

It's a double duty day.

Oh, my God.

No. No, please.

Let us begin.

Do you, Coop, take Megan to be your
wedded wife?

The Lord is my shepherd.

I shall not want.

And do you, Megan, take Coop to be your
wedded husband? To have and to hold.

He leads me by faith pastures.

Nothing shall I fear.

As long as you both shall live.

I do.

I don't.

I don't.

I do.

I do.

Though I walk in the valley of darkness,
I will fear no evil.

In our wedding culture, you're going to
get married.

And Lexi was in prison, and there was
this minister, and he was going to jab

in the arm with an executor. Hey, calm
down, honey.

You're dreaming.

I promise you.

They don't kill you for tax evasion.

Yeah, but they have Lexi locked up.

Megan, I've told you before.

Lexi has got an army of lawyers. She's
got a ton of wealthy friends.

Believe me, she's not rotting in a jail
cell somewhere.

I know, but it's just not fair that
she's being punished for something that

father did.

Will you listen to me, please?

Lexi can take care of herself.

Now, for your own sake, you gotta let
this go.

I can't.

Okay, we can't.

We can't just turn our backs on her.
This is something horrible that's

to somebody that we know, somebody that
you were married to, and somebody that

you supposedly care about. Sure, I do. I
care about her. But you know what? I'm

not going to marry Lexi. I'm not going
to marry her for money. I'm not going to

marry her for pity. I'm not going to
marry her for anything.

I can't believe you can live with
yourself when you could have done

and didn't. I can because I live for
you, not Lexi.

Dammit, you should do the same.

Hey, hi.

Welcome home.

Peter, it's been a long flight home from
the Dominican Republic, and I'm tired.

Why are you here?

I broke up with Lexi, and I'm in love
with you.

It's always been you.

Well, you've got this all wrong.

No, actually, I've got it all right. It
may sound trite, but I think we were

meant to be together.

No, we're not.

No, I finally figured this all out. I
mean, call it crazy. It may be forces or

fate, whatever, but you're divorced from
Kyle, and I'm not with Lexi.

Peter, I'm not divorced from Kyle.

But I thought that's why you went down
there.

I know, but it's a long story. I went
for a divorce, but Rory was along. It's

complicated.

But the bottom line is that Kyle and I
love each other, and we got married.

Again.

Hey, Pete.

What are you, the welcoming committee?

Yeah. Yeah, I guess so.

Well, uh, this being our first night
back, I don't think we want to spend too

much time talking, so why don't you come
to the reception on Thursday night,

and, uh, we'll catch up then.

Oh, good. Good. Sure. Why not?

You understand, right?

Yeah, of course. Of course. Welcome
home.

I got friends who think that when I'm

passing on the street, I got my kids
down to play when I'm down.

Yeah, well, I'm only here because the
surgery got canceled and I had time to

kill. And there's only so much time a
guy can spend in a cafeteria reading

medical journals. Hey, I'm reading, too.

Parenting. You should check it out.
Listen, where the hell's the doctor?

on her way.

Hey, give me your hand.

The baby's kicking again.

Well, of course he is.

You're his mother.

I'm surprised he's not screaming bloody
murder or holding up a liquor store.

Hi, Taylor.

Hi.

Michael, what are you doing here?

Um... Taylor's a pal.

We live together.

Temporarily. He's the daddy.

Oh.

I'd appreciate it if you kept that
between us. You know, a story like this

get around this hospital like an
epidemic.

You don't need to be scared of the
truth, sweetie.

Taylor, a favor, please.

Put a cork in it.

Listen, your business is your business,
and I'm just here to see to it that this

baby is born healthy. So, you ready?
It's gonna be cold. Okay.

Ooh! Whoa.

Okay.

There we go.

Okay. Take a look.

Oh my God.

Nice and healthy.

Everything's normal.

Look at that.

Okay.

Here you go.

The first photograph of your unborn son.

Oh, my God. It's so amazing.

Michael, our own little human being.

Oh.

Here's one for you, too, Michael.

Uh, no, thank you. You've seen one baby
picture. You've seen them all. Michael.

Fine. See you later.

So understand, Crick, you're a hell of a
shortstop.

If you don't keep your grades up, I'm
going to have to suspend you from the

team. Coach, it isn't fair.

Hey, life isn't fair. Sometimes it can
even be a real bummer.

Hey, guys, you want to stop giving my
girlfriend the once -over and get back

on the field? Let's go.

Come on.

Am I still your girlfriend after last
night?

I don't think we should break up after
one little argument, do you?

No, of course not. That's why I came
here.

To apologize.

I've been such an emotional mess since
this whole...

Billy and the Jonathan thing. I've been
taking it out on you.

Hey, Billy's your husband. You have a
right to be upset.

Yeah, but my marriage is over.

Now I gotta move on with it.

Well, you're getting no arguments from
me. I didn't think so.

I would love to start over.

Just put all this old baggage out of my
mind and act like it was when we first

met. Okay, it's a deal.

I get to do what I wanted to do the
first time I laid eyes on you.

Megan, I'll have another martini.

How about a cup of coffee instead?

Naked Irish and you got a deal. You
know, you don't have to punish yourself

that. Oh, come on, Megan. What planet
are you from?

Alcohol kills the pain. No, it doesn't.

Look, no more drinks, all right? Hey,
I'm not driving anywhere.

Hell, I'm going nowhere.

Listen, I'm glad you're out of jail and
that you're doing all right. Yeah, just

dandy. You know, Peter bailed me out.

First he dumped me and then he takes
pity on me.

You know, they took my picture, too.
Yeah, my new name is now 26401.

Maybe I should play that in the lottery,
huh?

My chances of winning $10 million are a
hell of a lot better than Coop ever

marrying me.

How did he take my incarceration?

Was he going to sleep over it?

Probably not.

You know, I'm going to check on that
coffee.

Hey.

Listen, I just wanted to come by and
apologize for this morning. Yeah, well,

know what? At this point, apologies
aren't enough. You have to take action.

you please drive Lexi home?

Oh, well, there he is.

Thank you for a man.

Want to share a little nightcap with the
convicts? Hey, give it a rest, Lexi,

all right? I'm trying to talk to Megan.
Oh, hey, Coop, talking cheap.

She bet my tax with Barnes.

Megan, if I wanted coffee, I would have
gone to Starbucks. Lexi, you need to sit

down and sober up, okay?

Megan, stop trying to take care of her,
all right? She obviously doesn't want

your help, and she doesn't appreciate
it. No, well, you know what? Someone's

to look out for her.

All right, fine.

You know what? You win. I'll take her
home.

But I'm telling you, Megan, this better
be the end of it.

Where are we going?

Dancing? Bowling? Hey, I'm up for
anything.

Oh, wow.

I think it helps to have Dave Cause in
the house.

Hey, you guys, you're back. Everything
worked out. You stopped the divorce.

No, but we got married again. For the
second and last time.

Well, however it happened,
congratulations.

It's nice to see things work out for two
people who are so in love.

Thank you for all your help.

If you need me, we'll be in my office
making our wedding reception plans.

Could you possibly close up tonight?

I've been doing it for weeks.

I guess I'll be the understanding wife
and try and wait up for you.

I promise I'll make it well with you,
Lyle.

You are quite the escort.

Go to bed.

Why won't you marry me?

You make my problems go away.

We still have a strictly platonic
relationship.

Hell, we could all live together. You,
me, and Megan.

You two can make kissy faces 24 hours a
day.

Damn it. Am I the only one who sees how
insane this is?

What kind of whacked -out father puts a
marriage stipulation in his will? Like a

secret clause with a $10 million
jackpot.

Come on, inheritances are supposed to be
about family things, like keepsakes and

houses and jewelry and armoires. Right,
okay.

My father was a lunatic.

But do you know what they say about
things with the father?

Yeah, well, I'm not entirely convinced
you're not following in his footsteps.

Coop. Is marrying me really that
repulsive?

I mean, it's only make -believe.

Besides, we've always been great
pretenders, you and me.

I gotta go.

Oh, cool.

Hey, don't you remember this?

You bought this for me on our first
wedding anniversary. Not only do I not

remember...

It's a fault.

I deserve what I get. I deserve a
present.

Come on, Lexi. It's not your fault. You
just caught up in a bad situation.

God, does he hate me that much? Why did
my father do this to me?

Oh, he didn't hate you.

Just... The old man, he couldn't...

Handle his own life so he thought he'd
manipulate yours.

I'm not alone, Coop.

I'm not so empty.

I don't have a friend in the world.

Nobody cares.

Nobody cares.

That's right, my love.

I'm your friend.

How do you like being the new
receptionist here at Mancini Burns

Isn't it Burns Mancini Cooper?

Yeah, well, only because I'm a nice guy
and I let other people's egos go before

my own.

That's sweet.

I mean, to work for three good -looking
doctors, it's a girl's dream come true.

Yeah.

Yeah, but who do you like the best?

Now, never mind that Coop's taken and
Peter's a little unstable.

Come on, come on, come on.

Oh, did I mention that I could get you
moved from temp to something a little

more permanent?

No. Did I mention that I was tangled?

Three times.

Did I?

Excuse me while I file these. Where do
we do, Michael?

Can't it wait?

I'm in a very dark place right now,
Michael, and watching you come on to our

secretary on her very first day doesn't
help my mood. It's a big deal. I'm a

free man.

She works for us. All the better.

Did you see that dress she has on? One I
wouldn't give to peel that thing off.

The last thing that this office needs is
a sexual harassment lawsuit.

Hey, I'm a great -looking guy, and
Carrie was enjoying her repartee every

much as I was. Well, this is a doctor's
office, not a dating service.

Oh, I get it. You're jealous. You got
your eye on Carrie, too, huh?

Michael, I am not interested in Carrie.

Unlike you, I am looking to put my life
together with someone that I care about.

Oh, let's see. Who would that be? Lexi?

Oh, no, you soured on her, and Taylor,
well, nobody in their right mind would

after her.

And there's, uh, Megan, but... No, she's
too smart to be interested in you.

Amanda? Again?

Get out of here. Now! Listen to me, I
have some advice for you. I don't want

to... Stop chasing ex -wives, former
lovers, and old flames, because once

they've dumped you, it's over. Trust me,
I should know. Thanks for the tip. Bye.

I'm sorry to bother you.

Can I come in?

Um, sure.

Can I, um, offer you something?

Juice or coffee?

No, thanks.

Coop was never any good at hanging his
things up.

You know, sometimes I have to make a
little game out of it.

Promised to hang everything, and I
promised to do the dishes.

Kind of miss those little things about
being married, those fun challenges.

So where do you stand?

Any chance you'll get the money?

Are you kidding me?

My attorneys tell me there's nothing
else they can do.

The IRS wants to seize my personal
assets.

I hope they let me keep my wedding
album.

God knows it doesn't mean a damn to
anyone but me and Coop.

If you're trying to make me feel sorry
for you, you don't have to. I already

I think this is terrible.

It's not pity I'm looking for, Megan.

Lord knows I've got plenty of that.

Then what do you want? Because there's
not a lot I can do.

Yeah. Coop has really limited your
options a bit, I imagine.

He loves you more than life itself.

Listen, I know Coop loves me.

But I don't know why you're telling me
all of this.

Well, Megan, I was hoping that maybe you
would be able to...

Who am I to expect that you... Forget
it.

Just forget it. No, no, listen. I want
to help. I want to talk to Coop. But you

have to admit, it's pretty ridiculous.
Two mature people marrying only for

money. Yeah, well, that shouldn't matter
to Coop, seeing that that's the reason

he married me in the first place.

Look, Megan, you're my last chance.

If Coop doesn't marry me, then...

My life's over.

I hope you two have a very happy...

I'm glad I ran into you two here. I want
to apologize about the other day. I

just took it by surprise that you two
got married so soon again.

It happens.

Um, Kyle, why don't you get at the
table? I want to talk to Peter just for

moment, if it's okay?

Be right back.

How long does be right back find me?

I just want to make sure that we're
clear on a couple of things. Oh, yeah,

Like what?

Well, like I'm married to Kyle, and I
always will be, and you need to let go.

Amanda, please. I think I can handle
myself.

Well, I don't understand. Where did this
sudden rebirth of interest in me come

from?

Well, my love for you didn't just pop
out of the blue, you know. It's always

been there.

It's just that I need a little help.

Therapy, actually, to uncover it.

Oh.

Well, I'm glad you're taking care of
yourself.

But I suggest you work on dealing with
your revelation rather than announcing

to the world.

I am dealing with things just fine,
thank you. It's just that I'm... I want

to be happy.

I couldn't be happier.

And you need to accept that.

You got it.

So, I guess I will see you tomorrow
night at the reception, if my invitation

still stands.

Of course it does, now that you know the
rule.

Table's ready.

Oh, Kyle.

Well, me too. Have a lovely dinner and a
lovely evening.

You too.

He okay?

I don't know if he'll ever be okay.

That's between him and his shrink.

Now, Taylor, what is all this?

I mean, how many outfits does one kid
need?

Oh, it's not about the baby still. It's
not about what the baby needs. It's

about what the parents need.

Every parent wants to dress their baby
as adorably as possible.

It's a vanity thing.

And who's paying for all this vanity?

You are.

And in return, you get to have one of
the cutest babies on the block.

Taylor, I don't want the cutest baby. I
don't want any baby at all.

They cry, they burp, and they're money
pit.

Yeah, first clothes, then toys, then
braces, and it never ends.

And then, as if you're not bankrupt
enough, they want to go to college. Who

needs the aggravation?

You do, because you need to care about
somebody else's welfare for a change.

Taylor, I'll be at the hospital if you
need me, but do me a favor and don't.

Oh, Michael, listen, can I just borrow a
couple of books? I spent my last dime

on baby books, and, well, I've been
craving licorice and liverwurst.

I guess I'm on to the L words now.

The ultrasound picture of our baby.

All right, don't do this, okay?

I told you, I don't care. This is not
our baby.

It's your baby. And as soon as you have
it, you're out of here.

I haven't had this much fun in a long
time.

Promise me this is our last wedding
reception.

I promise it'll be the last one where
you and I are the guest of honor.

Boss, I'm sorry to interrupt your party.
We've got big problems. Maria, what's

wrong? The food critic, you know,
Francine Carlson from the Herald. She's

at a table with her... pad and her
pencil. It was great. She ordered the

risotto and the rack of lamb with
rosemary, potatoes, pumpkins. Calm down.

Breathe. Talk to me.

I'm calm. I'm fine.

The problem is I can't do it. I'm
choking.

It's a disaster.

All right. I'll just come down. I'll
cook up a couple of things. Not a big

It's our wedding reception.

Yeah, I know, sweetheart, but our future
rests on this. I mean, what else am I

going to do? Hey, Kyle, why don't you go
in that kitchen and make those critics

the best damn meal they ever had? I'll
keep Amanda company. It's okay with

Amanda. Yeah, that's fine. Go ahead.

How about a dance?

One. Just because we're old friends. And
nothing more.

No.

Friendships can move mountains, you
know.

You know, that's pretty impressive, what
Kyle's doing.

Getting in that kitchen, rolling his
sleeves up, cooking up dishes all on his

own.

I take a lot of pride in his work. No
kidding?

Yeah. He's put his heart and soul into
this jazz club, huh?

Well, I certainly can't say I don't know
if I do the same myself.

Well, you don't have to. You're a
doctor.

Yeah, yeah. I never really have been
much of a risk taker. You know, I

for that stable professional. I can know
where my next paycheck's coming from.

Yeah, but you know, if this place
actually went under, The jazz club, the

restaurant. I'll still have you to bring
home the bacon.

Stop it, Peter. I'll lie. What?

Honestly, I'm just thinking out loud
here. Like hell you are. You're trying

create problems where there aren't any.
No, no, no. I told you before that I'm

only concerned about your happiness.

There's something going on in your
marriage. I can't, you know. You know,

is.

Love, honesty, fidelity.

Well, good.

Good.

It's just that, you know, when...

You glue things back together, sometimes
they're not as strong.

Kyle and I are happy, okay? And nothing
and no one is going to change that.

I think I'll go check on him in the
kitchen.

Well, I'm really glad you could come.

Oh, believe me, the pleasure's all mine.

So you said you were divorced.

Mm -hmm. Any children?

Absolutely not.

Cool.

They drive me nuts. You know, spitting
up, crying, screaming.

That stuff is not for me.

Well, you know what that means? We're
perfect for each other.

It's kind of stuffy in here. What do you
say we go down to the beach and watch

the sun come up?

Oh, a woman who steals my best lines. I
like that.

Like what?

What are you doing here?

Who are you? I'm the mother of his
child. Who are you? She's my date, and

like to keep it that way. So why don't
you enjoy the brie and crackers and

us alone? But, Michael, I... You don't
like kids, right?

About as immature as they come.

Use us.

You know, Lexi, she came to see me last
night.

Yeah, Megan, look, if she threatened you
or gave you some kind of sob story,

I... You know what?

She just needed a friend.

Okay, call me sensitive. Call me...

A pushover. I just, I don't see how we
can turn our backs on her.

Damn it, Megan. I want to marry you. And
only you.

I want to have our own reception.

I want to kiss when glasses clink. I
want to beat each other cake. I'd dance

till dawn.

That's all I want.

Man, we are so close.

We are so close to having all of that
and more.

You know, that's all I've ever wanted
to.

I just have to make one tiny detour.

I'm scared, Meg.

I've been down that road with Lexi
before, and... Yeah, but it's a

time. All I kept doing was looking for a
way out.

A way to break free.

That's why I turned to Kimberly.

You're a different man.

Everything's changed.

I mean, Kimberly is dead.

But I'm here, and I'm not going
anywhere.

All right, then.

If that's our only alternative, if,
uh... If there's nowhere else for Lexi

turn, then, uh...

I'll marry Lexi.

But only because I would do anything for
you.

Really?

But I'm telling you, Megan, first sign
of trouble, the first sign that she

anything more, the first time that she
pulls any kind of manipulative scam, I'm

out of there. I'm telling you.

I'm out of there.

Look, if I thought you would sleep with
Lexi, I'd never agree to do it.

Lexi is going to be fully aware that the
other woman comes first in my life.

Damn right.

Every time I turn around, you're here.

Hey, Sam.

What are you trying to do, rub my face
in your relationship?

No.

But I want to be upfront about this.

I decided to move in with Jennifer
because the guy needed his space.

Is that okay?

Oh, yeah. Lovers have the right to live
wherever they want.

Make out in the pool.

I don't care.

Hi, this is Jeff. Leave a message and
I'll call you back.

Hi, Jeff, it's Sam.

I just found out that Billy and Jennifer
moved in together in the building.

I just can't get away from them.

I'm trying.

I'm really, really trying to be healthy.

But they're always around.

Where are you?

Jeff. Hi, me too.

Well, like I said, she's a crazy woman.
She's stalking me and she thinks I'm the

father of her baby.

Are you?

Oh, please.

Would I lie to you?

I guess not.

You seem like an honest guy.

Sure. Of course I'm... Oh, man.

Oh, man.

Hill girl, we'll be at the beach in a
minute.

Honey?

No!

What do you think you're doing? Cut me
off. I had to get to the side of the

road. My wife's about to get burned.
Yeah, well, bring her to the nearest

hospital. There's no time.

Go on, Michael. You're a doctor.

Yeah. You're a doctor?

My God, Nick, come here and help my
wife. All right, all right. I'll get my

It's in the back seat.

Easy. Hi, we're going to put you in the
back seat right now. We're going to put

you in the back, okay? Okay, yeah. Help
me out here. Okay. Thank you.

Get in the back seat here.

Here we go. Easy.

Easy. Watch your head. Watch your head.

See if you can squat back a little bit.

Move your leg up here.

You got the gloves? Yeah, thanks.

Okay. How you feeling?

You're doing very, very well.

Very slowly.

Good. Let's see how we're doing here.

Oh, that's very good. You're doing very,
very well.

Nice and easy. Nice and easy.

Oh.

Wouldn't this have waited until the
morning? No, actually.

Megan and I have thought long and hard
about this when we finally come to a

mutual decision.

All right.

So, what is it? I'll marry you.

Oh, God, Coop, I don't know what to say.
It's about the money, Lexi.

That's all.

I know that.

And I would never expect or pretend it
to be about anything else.

Good, because you need to know this. You
need to understand it. I'm only doing

this for Megan's sake because of what
she wants.

I love her. I'll always love her. I'll
die for her if I have to.

I understand.

Coop, and I would never get in the way
of that.

I'm warning you, Lexi.

No games, no manipulations.

This marriage is on paper only.

In exactly one year, we file for
divorce.

You have my word.

So when is this going to happen?

Tomorrow night in your office. Coop and
I will make all the arrangements.

You guys.

I know.

What a big sacrifice this is for the
both of you, and I owe you so much.

Thank you for saving my life.

Yeah. See you tomorrow night.

Okay, very good.

Okay. Keep the breathing going.

Breathe, inhale.

I love you so much.

Exhale.

Doing great.

Congratulations,

Mr. and Mrs.

Donaldson.

Look, sweetheart.

Congratulations.

Healthy baby boy.

Look, sweetheart.

Oh, boy.

We have a family.

It's a miracle.

A miracle.

Thank you. It's a miracle.

Oh,

damn

it.

Michael. Carol, are we going to clean up
this baby stuff? Come on.

I had a long night.

I want to get some sleep.

Michael, what's on your shirt? It looks
like blood.

Oh, well, I... What happened?

My date was ruined. That's what
happened.

I was in my car, about to become the
well -deserved recipient of the number

male fantasy, when all of a sudden this
guy swerves and cuts me off, you know,

and I end up delivering his wife's baby
right then and there.

And then there were complications, so
I've been at the hospital all night.

Well, how's the baby? Is the baby okay?

Yeah, yeah.

You know, it was amazing seeing those
little eyes open and him take his first

breath.

Michael, just think, in a few months,
our little guy's going to open his eyes

and see the world for the very first
time, too.

Yeah. Thanks for reminding me I have to
go through this agony again.

You know, all that yelling and screaming
and wailing was really quite annoying.

Michael, come on. What do you expect?

Childbirth is painful.

That's right.

That's why you should continue taking
your birthing classes, and at the first

sign of pain, take any and all drugs
administered by your doctor.

Hey.

You really had me going with that
message last night.

I'm worried about you.

Thanks.

I've been on this terrible emotional
rollercoaster.

Yeah, I know.

You and I are finally finished with all
that, right?

Yeah.

Damn it, Sam.

Every time I start believing in you, you
blow it. You know that?

You want to make your husband jealous,
mess with somebody else's head.

So, I've ordered us caviar and
champagne, which I figured we'd have

after we made love.

Sweet. It's hard. I can't.

That's why I called.

The critic from the Herald liked the
restaurant so much that Good Day L .A.

wants to do an interview on camera.

Well, can't they do it during the day? I
thought we'd finally have a night

alone. Yeah, I know. I know, you know,
but this is, it's a big deal. I mean,

we're talking about lights, cameras.

I mean, it'll be major television, be
great exposure for us.

Hold on. What the hell do you think
you're doing? It's either Billy or me.

of us goes.

Kyle, I'll call you right back.

Would you like to rephrase that little
demand?

No, I can't work with him and live in
the same building with him.

Okay, let's see. Billy is my number one
ad man. He's worked for the company for

five years. He's creative, dependable,
easy to work with.

I saved your life.

That's old news, Sam.

Yep, right now, I'd say I'm favoring
keeping Billy by about 100 to 1.

You know, you could have at least told
me that he was moving into the building.

I thought you were my friend.

I am. That's why I'm giving you a second
chance.

Now learn how to be a mature adult in
life and go back to work.

Otherwise, you're the one that's fired.

Oh, of course I am. Everyone else is
abandoning me. Why shouldn't you?

You know that in my heart, you're my
wife.

Till death do us part.

Oh my God.

These are beautiful.

When my mom and dad died, they left me
their rings.

They meant so much to me that I... So
pretty.

I only wanted to share them with someone
very special.

This one was my father's.

Wow.

You and I are together.

And nothing comes between us.

You know what? Any man that has done as
much as you have for me deserves my own

dying love.

Forever.

Well, you got it.

So, Kyle, how do you manage to run two
successful establishments and still have

time for a personal life?

Uh, well...

I think owning a restaurant and a jazz
club, you just know that you're going

to... Excuse me. Oh,

you look even better in person. I hate
to interrupt, but I have to talk to you.

Babe, we've got an interview going here.
Our time is limited.

It'll only take a second.

Five minutes, please. No longer.

Yeah, excuse me.

So, what's wrong?

Everything. I've had a horrible day.
I've been in a lousy mood, napping at

everyone. But I think I know why.

Okay. We're newlyweds, and we've barely
had a moment alone.

Believe me, that's something that hasn't
gone unnoticed. All I want from you is

your solemn promise that you'll come
home tonight, soon.

I mean, we need to be together.

I miss you.

I miss you, too.

Oh, but we can't. Your interview.

To hell with her. She's a professional.
She can wait.

In sickness and in hell, as long as you
both shall live.

I do.

All right. The rings, please.

Did you have the rings, don't you, Coop?
Yeah, yeah, our friend had them.

Megan, I need the ring.

What? Please.

You may now exchange rings.

By the power vested in me by the state
of California, I now pronounce you

husband and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

Brett, Lexi, my best to both of you.
Thank you, Judge.

I'm sure we'd all like to start
celebrating, but let's get this little

out of the way first.

Although I know we've been over this
before, it's important that both of you

understand the terms of the codicil.

Two of you must remain married for at
least one year. You must be married. In

fact, absolutely no one else can live in
the same household.

If either or both of you misrepresent
yourselves or renege on any of these

terms, you will be forced to return all
the monies, which will then be donated

to charity.

In addition, you will be prosecuted for
fraud.

Do you both understand and accept these
terms?

Yeah, we do, Jordan.

Well, then, Coop.

I am pleased to hand you this check for
$10 million for both of you.

Congratulations. Thank you.

Isn't it nice to be two people in love?

Well, I've made reservations for the two
of you over at the Palm.

We'd best be on our way. You know what,
Jordan?

A moment like this really does deserve
another kiss.