All language subtitles for Mary Tyler Moore s02e20 The Care And Feeding Of Parents

Who can turn the world on with her
smile?

Who can take a nothing day and suddenly
make it all seem worthwhile?

Well, it's you, girl, and you should
know it.

With each glance and every little
movement you show it, love is all

need to waste it. You can never tell,
why don't you take it?

You're gonna make it after all

You're gonna make it after

to somewhere.

Hiya, Lou.

Hi.

Barry. Yes, sir. Where have you been?

Had lunch. Uh -huh. And what time did
you leave?

Uh, 12.

All right. And what time is it now?

12 .55.

Uh -huh.

And I suppose you usually take 55
minutes for lunch?

Uh, no, Mr. Grant. I usually take an
hour.

Even when it's Friday and you still
don't have a guest for Sunday's Face the

People show?

How do you know she doesn't, Lou? Does
she? I don't know. Why don't you ask

Well, no, Mr. Grant, I don't. Good.

Because there's this new city
councilman, Pete Peterson. His office

bugging me to get him on the show.

What do you know about him? He's really
cute.

If I wanted cute, I'd get Hubert
Humphrey.

See what we got on him. Yes, sir. Hey,
Lou.

I voted for Peterson, if that's any
help.

He's 35, single, sandy hair. Who didn't
vote for him?

Rhoda, it's one o 'clock.

Isn't your lunch hour over?

No, my boss doesn't care if I'm a little
late.

I care.

Mary, I think I better get going. I just
remembered there's this boss who hates

it when I'm late.

Yours.

Bye -bye. See you tonight.

Bye, Rhoda.

Oh, hiya, Rita.

Way to go, champ.

So what'd you find on him?

Well, not too much.

Oh, look, why don't you go down to
Peterson's office and check him out? See

he'd be any good on the show. Pete
Peterson, the new city councilman?

You... Actually know the name of an
elected official?

Absolutely. Voted for him. Man's got a
great think tank.

What's the matter?

You and I voted for the same man.

We had a bit of party before the
election.

Impressed me so much, I not only voted
for him, I campaigned for him.

Peterson's my kind of man.

I'll, uh, check him out.

Twice.

Councilman Peterson's office. Can I help
you?

You're calling for a job?

We don't have any jobs.

Oh, yes, I know. The councilman talked a
lot during the campaign about finding

people jobs.

But what he meant was he would try and
create new jobs in this district. No, he

hasn't.

No, he's only been in office two weeks.

What sort of work do you do?

You were a Viking?

Oh, a Minnesota Viking.

Oh, I'm sorry you pulled your hamstring.

Um, look, do you know how to do anything
else? I mean, do you have any special

skills?

You can drive a car.

Well, terrific. Look, I'll keep my ears
open, and if any car -driving jobs come

up, I'll call you. What's your number?

Got it.

Eighty -seven?

That was a good one. Oh.

Hi, I'm Chris Wilson. I'm Mary Richards.
Can I help you with something? Oh,

well, yes. I'm from WJM TV, and I'm here
about Face the People.

What's that?

Oh, well, it's a show we do on Sunday
afternoons where a political figure

answers questions from the audience.

Hard questions?

Well, yeah, I guess you'd call them hard
questions.

Well, I certainly hope you find
somebody.

Well, actually, somebody from your
office called us about Mr. Peterson

the show.

I can guarantee you no one from this
office would make that call.

I did.

No.

Well, you know how he's always talking
about getting himself across to the

people, and I thought this would be a
way. I mentioned it to Pete, and he said

he thought it was a great idea.

Okay, girls, on our way.

Oh, hi.

I'm Pete Peterson. Am I your councilman?
Well, yes and no.

Pardon? Well, see, I live in your
district, but I didn't vote for you.

That's... Well, you didn't vote for me
and you came to me for help, right? Uh,

no. Yeah, good. I bet I get your vote
next time. Come on, Pete. We'll be late

for the mayor. Excuse me. Oh, Mr.

Peterson, I almost forgot.

That man from Urban Renewal called this
morning. He'll be in from Washington

next week to look at the slum area.

Waller, couldn't we get that slum area
cleaned up before he gets here? I mean,

it's really a sight.

Pete, if we cover up the slum, we might
not qualify for the loan?

Good thinking. Leave it the way it is.

Mayor. Mayor.

Take it to my office.

Maybe Councilman Peterson isn't quite
ready for your show after all. What

Face the People.

Face the People.

Sounds good. Is that one of those game
shows?

Oh, no, no. It's a political question
and answer show.

Hard questions?

questions. Oh, I'm afraid the councilman
is much too busy.

Oh, but even on Sunday? Oh, yes. He has
to go to church.

Well, listen, we can tape the show at
his convenience.

Well, once the councilman gets into
church, it's hard to get him out.

But thanks for thinking of us anyway.
That was really the mayor.

Call me Pete.

Yeah, I wanted to know what I thought
about the teacher strike.

Want to know what I told him? No, why
don't you tell me in the car? Wait,

I might forget.

I told him I thought the teachers had
every right to go on strike.

As long as they didn't miss any classes.

Well, what did you want to see me about?

Oh, well, I just dropped by to, you
know, say hi.

Get some people in here. I like lots of
complaints.

Water?

What he means when he says he wants more
complaints is...

Oh, yes, I did, Mr. Grant. And he just,
he wouldn't be right for the show. Mary,

the show is just two days away. I know
that, and I'm working on getting

else. As a matter of fact, I expect a
confirmation call any second.

Huh?

Newsroom?

Yes, sir. Just a moment, please.

Mr. Grant, it's for you. The station
manager, and he says it's important.

Of course it's important.

You expect him to say, put Lou on the
phone? It's trivial?

the details then. And listen, thanks
again.

Right, bye -bye.

Murray, guess who I got to be on face
for people?

The chief of police. The chief of
police.

How did you know?

They called while you were out.

Hey, listen, uh, you said you voted for
Peterson, didn't you? Yeah.

You mind my asking why?

Sure. He was a mole.

Disciple judges and sewer bonds, I vote
the straight Moe ticket.

Well, I think you made a mistake in
Peterson's case. Why?

He's definitely an eenie.

Larry, can you come in here a minute?

Yes,

sir? Larry, about Face the People.

Ah, Mr. Grant, don't worry. I got the
chief of police.

Really?

a good guest.

Well done.

Thank you.

Bump him.

Bump him? Off the show?

Mr. Grant, why?

I mean, after all that trouble...
Because Councilman Peterson's going to

guest. Peterson? But Mr. Grant, I told
you... And the station manager just told

me that Councilman Peterson would be an
excellent guest.

But he wouldn't. But that doesn't
matter, Mary.

What matters is that Councilman Peterson
and the station... Station manager? Go

fishing together.

Need I say more?

Yes, because Peterson just would not be
a good guest. I mean, he isn't ready.

The station manager ought to trust my
judgment. I mean, I am the associate

producer on the show, you know.

Maybe if I went to him and talked to
him, I could get him to change his...

do you bump a chief of police?

Gently.

I don't think I did speak to you before.
You must have spoken to Chris. Who's

calling, please?

Just a moment. Chris, there's a Mack
truck Tarkus on the phone.

That must be my Viking.

Thank you.

Hiya, truck.

No, no jobs yet, but I'm still looking.

Hey, listen, you said you could drive.

Why don't you give me your number?

Thank you. Now, may I have your
telephone number, please?

Okay. I'll call you if anything comes
up.

Bye.

So then, what are you going to do
tonight?

Oh, I'll either go out with a fantastic
man to dinner and a movie, or if I don't

meet one, I'll just go home and clean
the oven.

Come over to my house for dinner
tonight.

Oh, I don't think I'd better. Oh, come
on. My mom would just love to meet you.

Why don't you? Oh, I'm just more work
for your mother.

I'm an extra place at the table.

I'm another dish to wash.

I'm white.

Don't let that bother you, baby. Half
the people in my neighborhood are white.

Used to be all the people were white.

He's determined to be on. He knows my
boss is boss, so he's on, and I'm sorry.

This Sunday?

Well, listen, maybe Pete will surprise
you.

I mean, he certainly looks smart, you
know, even if he, you

know, not that many people watch the
show.

Well, who says he has to bomb?

I mean, we've got two days.

If we work on him tonight and tomorrow
and feed him all the answers to every

possible question, he just might really
be great.

Well, listen, it's worth a try. Isn't
it, Chris?

As Pete would say, when your ship is
sinking and you're treading water, if

somebody throws you an anchor, grab it.

the councilman some questions.

I'm gonna ask that councilman a
question.

That's why I'm dressed like this. Well,
don't you think that's a little special?

Mary, listen, I guarantee you, when Joan
Kennedy met Teddy, she was not wearing

a sweatshirt.

Uh, maybe she was.

What? Well, I think they met playing
touch football.

I'm kidding.

Listen, uh, I'll be back.

Uh, hey, who else is coming?

Uh, just the councilman's staff.

Oh, yeah, the girls' staff. or men's
staff?

Girl's staff.

Terrific.

Hello? Ah, hi.

Jennifer Riley, this is Rhoda
Morgenstern. Hi, what a great looking

are you going? To change.

Excuse me.

Come on in.

Coffee's ready.

Great. Gee, this is a nice place.

Thank you.

Pete'll be here in a minute. If he
doesn't get lost, he does that a lot.

reservations, clerk.

Oh, is that what you were?

Yeah, well, I really wanted to be a
stewardess, but that's another story.

Anyway, I decided I wanted to work in
government, so I sent out two dozen

letters offering my services to various
politicians, and I got back 23

mimeographed acceptances and one badly
typed five -page letter,

postage due.

So I went where I was needed.

I mean, enough people voted for him to
get him elected.

Well, maybe everybody just wanted to
help him.

Ah, Chris. Hello, Mary. Hi. I want you
to meet my mom, Mrs. Wilson, Mary

Richardson. How do you do?

Hi. Hi, Chris.

Hi, Mrs. Wilson.

Did I thank you enough for that
wonderful dinner last night? Well, there

that half hour at the door, and if that
wasn't enough, the two phone calls and

the flowers were plenty.

I hope you don't mind my bringing mom
along.

Oh, but my brother took the car, so Mama
had to bring me over in the bus.

Your mother had to bring you? I can't
drive that bus.

You drive a bus?

Yeah, the Mount Bethany Sunday School
bus.

Oh. Well, listen, sit down, please.

Oh, thank you. Now, don't worry about
me. I will just sit here and knit.

Okay. Would you like some coffee?

Thank you.

Cream of sugar, please. Right.

Oh, I'll get that for you in just a
second.

What are you wearing? You don't like it,
huh?

Then you're gonna hate this.

I wrote a Morgenstern here. Pete
Peterson. Ah, yes, I did. Well, I made

Listen, I knew there was something about
you I liked. Ah, what's that?

You're wearing a yarmulke.

A yarmulke?

Oh,

the beanie. Oh.

Well, I just came from a bar mitzvah.
It's very interesting. It's a Jewish

ceremony. It's very, very nice. Yeah, I
know. I heard.

Yes, a young boy. My brother, I know.
I'm familiar with it. Yeah, it's very

nice. Well, listen.

I don't drink.

Oh.

Well, then, why don't we all sit down?

Yeah, I'm in kind of a hurry. At 9 o
'clock, I have to open up the new rec

at the Scandinavian Singles Club.

Oh, Harry, I'd like some coffee.

Coffee.

Pete, I want you to meet my mom, Mrs.
Wilson.

I voted for you. Thank you. Did you?

Mrs.

Wilson, what is it about my campaign
that appealed to you?

Well, the other guy wore a beard, and
you didn't. I don't trust a politician

with a beard.

I suppose you wouldn't have voted for
Abraham Lincoln.

Of course not. He was a Republican.

Well, the councilman doesn't have a lot
of time, so why don't we get right down

to business?

Mary, why don't you brief him?

Okay.

It's a half -hour show.

There's a moderator, Ted Baxter.

Oh, I know Ted. Right guy.

the audience and stand in front of the
microphone and ask you questions.

Sounds fine to me. Of course, you
realize the answers to the questions are

important. Absolutely. I think people
have the right to expect answers to

questions. Perhaps we might discuss what
some of the questions might be.

I've got a question.

Rhoda, Councilman, do you intend to
marry?

As a matter of fact, I do. June the 6th.
You're engaged?

Would you like to see her pictures?

They are right here.

You're going to marry Gail Storm?

Oh, that came with the wallet. There we
are.

You know, Councilman, you never mention
a word during your entire campaign about

being engaged.

I never had anybody ask me that and I
get mad before.

Generally, I get mad about garbage
pickup and stuff like that. What about

garbage pickup?

I'm for it. You mean...

of waste disposal that is compatible
with the ecology.

Isn't that what you mean?

What do you mean, isn't that what I
mean? She means that's how you might

that question tomorrow.

Oh, I don't know.

I don't know if ecology isn't something
that just sounds good now.

But in the future, we may be sorry we
got into it, like Vietnam.

About your engagement.

Congratulations.

I think we should go over that garbage
pickup question again.

What do you mean, go over it? I just
answered it. But don't you think it

be better if you said something a little
more scientific or something? Wait a

minute. Wait a minute. Now, what's going
on here? Oh, we're just trying to think

of questions that you might be asked so
you could have some answers.

Oh, I don't think we should go into this
having any of the answers. But all

politicians are briefed and prepared.

That's the trouble with politics. I
mean, everyone has pat answers to all

questions. I mean, I want the people to
know that I don't have any answers.

What are you making, Mrs. Wilson?

I am knitting you a beard.

Mr.

Peterson, what are your feelings about
having a woman run for mayor?

Well, I'd like to see a woman's name on
the ballot next year.

But would you vote for her?

Well, it depends on if I thought she was
the best candidate.

And her being a woman wouldn't prejudice
you. I don't vote for race, color,

creed, or sex.

I vote for the man.

Well said, Councilman. Thank you.

We'll be right back with more Face the
People right after this brief

announcement. He kind of makes you
wonder if Ted isn't a ventriloquist.

Oh, hey, great. Look, the baseball
game's gone into extra innings. Well,

hey, maybe nobody is watching my show.

It looks like it's going to be another
hot summer, Councilman.

What are the kids who live in the inner
city going to do for recreation?

Well, they could go swimming, couldn't
they? That sounds like a lot of fun.

Mr. Peterson, there are no swimming
pools in that area.

Ah. Well, what did they do last summer?

Occasionally, they'd open the fire
hydrants, but there aren't enough of

Well, the answer seems fairly simple.
Put in more fire hydrants.

Good thinking, Pete.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm supposed to be
partial.

I see our time is up, and I want to take
this time to thank Councilman Peterson

for having the courage to come here this
afternoon and face the people.

Well, that's that.

Oh, I don't know what to say. You've
already said it.

He's an eenie.

Hey, I thought it went great, didn't
you, Walter?

No, it didn't go great. It went
horrible.

Horrible? Did you think it went
horrible, Ted?

No, I thought it was one of the best
shows I've ever done.

Hear that? And he's a professional.

Thank you.

Being out there in front of that live TV
audience, finding out I had ability to

make people laugh?

Isn't it a great feeling?

Well, Ted and I are going to go. and
chew the old fat, though. We'll see you

later, okay?

Say, listen, we get a chance to talk
about foreign affairs.

Did you see the Bob Hope Christmas show?

Oh, boy, was that fantastic.

Huh? Boy, that Harmon, he's something.

Harmon? Killebrew.

He hit a home run with two men on in the
bottom of the 11th between one.

Mr. Grant, you mean that you were
watching the ball game?

Well, who wasn't?

How'd you guys do?

I've trot nothing yet, but I'm still
looking.

Hiya. Ready for lunch? Hi, Mary. We can
go in a minute.

Oh,

Mary, I was just going to call you. I
thought maybe I could do your show

Oh, well, listen, we have a policy.

You see, the same guest can't be on more
than once in a year. It's dumb, I know,

but... That's too bad. I really felt TV
was my meat.

Well, I have to go and make a speech. I
haven't written it yet. I generally

write in my car, but the last time I
tried to think of a speech in my car, I

lost. You know my car keys?

I put them in your coat.

Oh, my coat.

My coat. Your coat's in your office. My
coat's in my office.

You know what you need?

What's that? A driver.

Then you could write your speeches in
your car and not get lost.

That's a good idea. Remind me to find
one, okay?

Pete, your car, is it stick shift or
automatic?

Automatic. I've got just the guy for
you.

Oh, you'll like it. I like him, too.

He's a Viking.

Good. A link to another minority.