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Ladies and gentlemen, thanks to a killer
story by our own Murphy Brown, last
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night's broadcast of FYI received the
highest ratings of the season.
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A few of the boys in the Senate were
running up the parking tickets, taking
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many of those fact -finding trips to
tropical locales. But that was before
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met the Murfinator. Where is it? I
always saw it. And look at her, the star
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the hour, already at work on another
blockbuster story. Here it is.
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Breastfeeding classes.
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Oh, dear Lord.
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All I have to do is pick one.
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So you're taking a breastfeeding class,
Murph? Is that like Lamaze? You need a
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partner?
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Morning, everyone.
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Murphy? Hey, Stan.
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So how's everything in the legal
department?
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Same as usual, I suppose.
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Contracts, depositions, running through
the maze trying to find that piece of
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cheese. Ah, and that would be a rodent
lawyer reference.
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How refreshingly original.
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We need to talk, Murphy Miles. You'll
want to join us?
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You know, Stan, I thought about you the
other day.
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They were wanting the movie Willard on
television.
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Newswoman, comedian, is there no limit
to your talent?
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Don't catch your tail in the door.
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I'll get right to the point. It seems
your big story has raised quite a few
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hackles on Capitol Hill.
Congratulations, Murphy.
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You've been subpoenaed by the Senate.
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What? You're kidding.
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I'm afraid not.
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Tell me, Murphy, your story last night
was based on... Four months of research,
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and it was confirmed by an internal
Senate Ethics Committee report. A report
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that was supposed to be for the Ethics
Committee's eyes only. And you got that
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report from... A confidential and
reliable source with Senate contacts.
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thereby hangs the subpoena. Somebody
leaked that report to you. The committee
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wants a name. Can life get any better?
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First the ratings, then the reviews, and
now the publicity of Senate testimony?
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It's an embarrassment of riches. It's a
pain in the neck. Now I have to take
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time out from my schedule to spend 30
seconds in a hearing reminding them of
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First Amendment rights.
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You think it's going to be that easy,
Murphy?
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The Senate's dead serious about stopping
leaks. They want a name, and if they
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don't get one, they could find you in
contempt of Congress, which in turn
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you could go to prison. And as much as
that idea secretly thrills me, the
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network pays me to see that it doesn't
happen.
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I knew it.
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I got too cocky. For a split second, I
allowed myself to enjoy life.
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God asked me to sit down, and then he
yanked the chair away.
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We've got a few days to prepare, Murphy.
Now, there are ways to present your
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testimony that might appease the
committee and won't alienate anyone.
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whoa, whoa. Hold it. I don't need
handlers or strategy sessions. I'm in
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right.
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Oh, look.
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Stan is a child.
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How do you put up with this every day?
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Don't ask me, Stan. Ask my colon.
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I mean it, Stan. I can handle this about
you. So if you hear an ambulance, you
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have my full permission to go chase it.
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You don't listen, do you?
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What did I tell you yesterday? I said
wear something maternal. You're
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We should use it. Oh, right. I'm going
to get up in front of all these people
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and emphasize my book. Why don't I just
wear a name tag? Hello, my name is
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Greenland. This isn't funny, Murphy.
It's bad enough that you stopped in the
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lobby and asked if they sold Anita Hill
activewear.
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So, gentlemen, if you're ready, I'd like
to begin the proceedings. Say, John, I
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may not be asking many questions today.
My advice... It's all right, Ned. We
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know about your problem with the unpaid
parking.
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So, if you gentlemen excuse me, I'm
going to greet our witness.
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Oh, Miss Brown.
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John Hyden, I'm the committee chairman.
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I realize this is a little uncomfortable
for you, but it's just a necessary part
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of the democratic process.
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As I once said, a government of the
people, by the people, and for the
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shall not perish on this earth.
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Miss Brown, Adam Sampson, nice to see
you again. Remember you once did a story
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unfairly accusing me of not hiring women
in minorities.
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Lowell Laughlin, we met when y 'all
concocted those unseemly allegations
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my last campaign.
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Warren Thatcher, you called me pompous
and arrogant during a live interview.
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again. Small world, isn't it?
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Well, shall we get started?
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Gentlemen?
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Murphy, look. The senator on the end,
Hargate.
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Didn't you send him a live pig after he
voted against the ERA?
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Stan! Stan, why so shy? Come over here
and sit beside me.
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Okay, ladies and gentlemen, the hearing
is now called to order.
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Ms. Brown, will you please stand up?
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Raise your right hand.
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Do you swear that the testimony that
you're about to give in this proceeding
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will be the truth, the whole truth and
nothing but the truth? I do. Please
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proceed.
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Ms. Brown, several days ago, a
classified Senate report was made
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public by you.
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Now, this committee was formed to
determine how you came into possession
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report.
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So, Ms. Brown, who made the report
available to you?
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Senator... The First Amendment
guarantees my right to present
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public without being subjected to
governmental restraint.
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Therefore, I wish to invoke my privilege
as a journalist. I will not name my
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source.
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No, I guess that about does it. Miss
Brown,
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disclosing a classified Senate report is
a very serious charge.
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Has your attorney explained to you that
if you are found in contempt of
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Congress... You could go to prison.
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Yes, Senator, but I believe I'm
protected by the First Amendment.
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Mr. Chairman, may I have the floor?
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The chair yields to my esteemed
colleague.
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Uh, Ms. Brown, why would you take a
classified report and read it on the
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television?
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Senator, journalists release information
to the public for one reason only, the
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public's right to know.
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But the public didn't vote for you, Ms.
Brown. They voted for us.
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And if we want to keep a secret, you
shouldn't be running around like a
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dog flapping your jaw like a loose
-shutting hurricane.
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Senator, may I respectfully remind you
of the importance of the press in a
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democratic society?
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Without the press, Watergate, the
savings and loan debacle, and Iran
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never have come to light.
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So?
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Mr. Chairman, Mr. Chairman. Senator
Simpson.
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Miss Brown, you talk about the rights of
journalists.
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Well, I'm here to tell you that the hard
-working taxpayers of my state are sick
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and tired of the press prying into every
little detail to make it impossible for
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us to run the government.
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I have letters from these Americans.
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Where are those letters?
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Letters which say you liberal reporters
are distorting the truth. Letters which
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say... Watch out for this woman. Watch
out for this Murphy Brown. Do you have
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those letters?
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Well, anyway.
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It's clear the American people want to
feel good about their country, and they
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should. There isn't a better place to
live on the face of this earth.
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Is there a question in there somewhere,
Senator?
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Well, maybe it's just me.
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Maybe I don't get it.
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But how can you claim to serve the
public interest?
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When the public is fed up with you.
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Senator, I think what the public is fed
up with is seeing their tax dollars
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spent on tropical vacations, health club
memberships, and parking privileges for
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their elected representatives.
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A yield to Senator Dennehy.
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Well, I would just like to take this
opportunity to say that
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it is wrong not to pay parking tickets.
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I know it's wrong, but I'm sure.
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that the fine people of my home state
will forgive any bookkeeping errors by
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staff, which may have occurred for
whatever reason. Senator, may I have the
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floor? Yes, I yield.
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Am I alone in being outraged by this?
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Because I'm outraged.
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A body of our government has been... And
leaks are becoming commonplace. Leaks
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are very dangerous things.
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So are secrets, Senator.
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Do you have no regard for national
security?
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Am I to take it if you were to receive,
say, a secret copy of our nation's
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battle plan for Operation Desert Storm,
you'd just, you'd make it public? No, of
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course not.
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Well, how do you determine whether or
not to release classified information? I
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use my personal judgment as a
journalist.
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Your personal judgment.
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I see.
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Would that be the same personal judgment
that led you to become an unwed mother?
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Objection!
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Excuse me, Senator, but I don't see how
that relates to the matter at hand. Oh,
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well, perhaps I can clear up any
confusion you're having. I've put
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report detailing some of the judgments
you've made.
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Volume 1, The Early Years.
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He wasn't the only one doing it, Miles.
It was Woodstock, for God's sake.
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I know, Murphy, and I'm sure they
exaggerated it. There's no way that you,
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Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Janice Joplin
could fit in the same port -a -potty.
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Murphy, we were so proud of you. You
were the perfect example of grace under
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pressure. But for tomorrow, a tiny
suggestion.
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Just two little words.
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Dress shields.
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That's bad.
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You know what really bugs me?
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I mean, besides the sweating thing?
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Why do they keep digging up the past? I
mean, what does the past have to do with
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anything? Oh, I know what they're doing.
It's so obvious. They don't care about
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the leak. It's a personal vendetta.
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They're just getting back at me for all
the times I made them look bad.
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You're a very good reporter, Murphy. I'm
surprised you're missing the bigger
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picture. It's not just you.
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They're using you as an example to the
press. The warning is, if you push us,
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this is what you can expect.
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You know, I think you might have
something there.
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Hang on a sec.
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It's me.
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Wouldn't I love to give that committee a
piece of my mind? I'd read them the
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riot act.
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Our inner cities lie in ruin and decay.
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Our middle class is adrift and
disillusioned, and there they sit, those
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weenies, playing their little weenie
game.
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Feel free to use that, Murphy. Little
weenies. Little weenie game.
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Okay, Murph.
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This is what you do tomorrow.
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Two answers.
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Yes, Senator.
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No, Senator.
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That's it. They want to make it tough on
you. You make it tough on them. That's
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what I would do.
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It looks like you'll get your chance,
Frank. The office tells me the committee
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is issuing subpoenas for Dial, Fontana,
Sherwood, and Silverberg. What? You're
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kidding.
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I suppose they plan to question you as
colleagues of Murphy's. But we don't
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know...
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Guys, I'm really sorry about this. No,
this is great.
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You are not alone, Murph.
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Tomorrow we present a united front.
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I'd say we give them hell.
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I'm with Frank. You don't fool with FYI.
Our inner city is lying ruined and
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decayed, and tomorrow they're going to
hear about it from me. They're going to
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hear about it from all of us. I wish I
could be there with you.
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But since I can't, would you mind
wearing one of these on camera?
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We say you've been a friend and
colleague of Ms. Brown since 1977.
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Yes, Senator.
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In that time, has she ever been
motivated by the personal glory the
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bring her?
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00:12:08,020 --> 00:12:09,020
No, Senator.
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00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:14,260
So then the awards and accolades she
receives are not the driving force in
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00:12:14,260 --> 00:12:15,940
career? Yes, Senator.
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00:12:16,220 --> 00:12:18,200
I mean, no, Senator.
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I mean, do you mean...
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Yes, they are the driving force, or no,
they're not the driving force. I mean,
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does she pursue story simply to satisfy
her ego? Mr. Fontana, do you feel Miss
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Brown is a responsible journalist?
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No. What?
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00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:35,980
To the one before.
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Yes to the last one.
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So that's yes, no, yes, yes.
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I think.
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Check, please.
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Corky Sherwood Forrest, and I have been
a professional journalist since 1988.
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And if I may add a personal observation,
I
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have seen you on FYI, and I commend you
for your incredible body
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of work.
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00:13:14,380 --> 00:13:20,840
Your ability to stimulate me as a member
of the viewing public.
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With your sensitive probing style.
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My
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00:13:26,190 --> 00:13:33,090
name
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00:13:33,090 --> 00:13:34,090
is Miles Silverberg.
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I'm the executive producer of FYI.
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00:13:36,310 --> 00:13:37,310
Now, Mr.
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00:13:37,930 --> 00:13:39,150
Silverberg, was it?
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00:13:40,030 --> 00:13:41,030
Yes, Senator.
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00:13:41,930 --> 00:13:43,610
Silverberg. Mr.
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00:13:44,070 --> 00:13:46,230
Silverberg, were you born in this
country?
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00:13:51,560 --> 00:13:52,560
Yes, sir, I was.
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00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:55,440
I see. Well, to continue, Mr.
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00:13:55,880 --> 00:14:01,440
Silverberg, with regards to Miss Brown's
story, would you say that piece was
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00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:02,500
politically motivated?
249
00:14:03,180 --> 00:14:07,160
No, Senator, absolutely not. Miss Brown
has always kept her political beliefs
250
00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:08,160
well clear of her work.
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00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:09,119
I see.
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00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:12,740
Mr. Silverberg, were you raised in New
York?
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00:14:17,820 --> 00:14:20,180
Yes, I was, but I don't see how... Uh
-huh.
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00:14:28,099 --> 00:14:34,100
continue. Was Miss Brown pleased when
that story became big news, Mr.
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00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:35,840
Silverberg?
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00:14:37,820 --> 00:14:41,880
Well, as a journalist, she felt she had
presented a well -balanced, even
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00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:45,560
-handed, carefully researched story, and
she said those clowns in the Senate
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00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:46,560
deserved to be exposed.
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00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:50,720
Not that being a clown is a bad thing.
260
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:52,519
Clowns are good.
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00:14:52,520 --> 00:14:54,420
They make people laugh and forget their
troubles.
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00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,000
Emmett Kelly was a clown.
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00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:57,460
I think he was even on a stamp.
264
00:15:01,620 --> 00:15:02,020
My
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00:15:02,020 --> 00:15:10,600
name
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00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:14,000
is Jim Dial, and I'm the senior anchor
on the news program FYI.
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00:15:14,420 --> 00:15:19,120
Mr. Dial, did Ms. Brown ever mention the
name of her source to you?
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00:15:19,340 --> 00:15:21,980
No, sir, she did not. And now... Thank
you, Mr. Dial.
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00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,040
You can go now.
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00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:28,540
But... I have a prepared statement to
read. Please, Mr. Dial, we have a long
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00:15:28,540 --> 00:15:29,540
ahead of us.
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00:15:30,460 --> 00:15:31,460
Very well.
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00:15:33,060 --> 00:15:35,180
But our city's lying ruined and decayed.
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00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:41,460
Miss Brown, you've spent some time at
the Betty Ford Clinic, have you not? I
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00:15:41,460 --> 00:15:43,620
believe we covered that yesterday,
Senator.
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00:15:43,900 --> 00:15:48,080
And you have experienced alcohol
-related blackouts. That was over four
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00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:53,320
ago and only once. And alcohol does
terrible things to the judgment, doesn't
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00:15:54,030 --> 00:15:58,690
Now, at this point, I'd like to read a
passage from the novel Valley of the
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00:15:58,690 --> 00:15:59,690
Dolls.
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00:16:02,330 --> 00:16:03,330
Chapter one.
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00:16:04,190 --> 00:16:06,410
I saw you. I saw you on television.
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00:16:06,730 --> 00:16:11,050
That when a sale on overalls over a
Sears, there you were on a whole wall of
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00:16:11,050 --> 00:16:12,050
TVs.
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00:16:13,250 --> 00:16:18,050
I became so enraged watching our elected
officials at work, I marched down to
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00:16:18,050 --> 00:16:23,850
the lawn and garden department, got a 50
-pound bag of manure, came back up, And
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00:16:23,850 --> 00:16:26,310
I laid it in front of the biggest TV I
could find.
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00:16:27,690 --> 00:16:31,050
I myself thought it was an extremely apt
political statement.
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00:16:32,190 --> 00:16:33,730
However, Sears disagreed.
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00:16:35,710 --> 00:16:37,770
I'm no longer welcome where America
shops.
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00:16:41,670 --> 00:16:45,090
You know, I don't want to scare you,
Murph, but after seeing those guys
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00:16:45,090 --> 00:16:48,890
firsthand today, I think they could
really vote to send you up the river.
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00:16:49,090 --> 00:16:52,090
No. No, we can't have that. The baby
can't be born in a joint.
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00:16:55,150 --> 00:16:56,590
Then she should reveal her source.
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00:16:57,310 --> 00:17:00,750
This is terrible. This is terrible. Just
when the rest of the world is starting
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00:17:00,750 --> 00:17:03,930
to move towards democracy, we're taking
a giant step backwards.
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00:17:04,569 --> 00:17:08,109
Next thing you know, we're going to be
standing in line to buy blue jeans, and
297
00:17:08,109 --> 00:17:10,470
our women are going to start winning all
the Olympic medals in swimming.
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00:17:13,670 --> 00:17:19,569
I'll go get you some dinner, and I got
to go start hoarding salami in the
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00:17:19,569 --> 00:17:20,569
paper.
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00:17:22,450 --> 00:17:23,450
Murph?
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00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,500
I've never run away from a fight, Frank.
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00:17:28,319 --> 00:17:33,420
But now, any fights I take on, I'm going
to be dragging this little guy in with
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00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:34,420
me.
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00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:38,000
I'm not sure if I have the right to do
that.
305
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:44,500
Murph, you're in a tough situation, and
you need to...
306
00:17:44,500 --> 00:17:50,220
Well, nobody's going to think any less
of you if you review your source.
307
00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:55,780
I guess I wanted to hear that.
308
00:17:59,060 --> 00:18:00,420
I should go. You must be beat.
309
00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:06,600
You know, I gotta tell you, after seeing
what these guys put you through today,
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00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:10,500
next time something good gets leaked my
way, I'm gonna have to think twice
311
00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:11,500
before I use it.
312
00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:15,520
Good night, Murph.
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00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:29,800
It's our job to vote whether to
recommend to the full Senate that you be
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00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:30,800
with contempt.
315
00:18:31,120 --> 00:18:34,120
And in deliberating that... Excuse me,
Senator, I have something to say.
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00:18:35,120 --> 00:18:40,840
Senator, last night I decided that I
would come here today and reveal to you
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00:18:40,840 --> 00:18:41,840
name of my source.
318
00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:45,100
I had one very good reason for doing
that.
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00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:47,820
It's a reason that's very close to my
heart.
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00:18:48,380 --> 00:18:51,180
Well, actually, it's closer to my
stomach at the moment.
321
00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:54,640
But then...
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00:18:55,020 --> 00:18:59,900
A colleague of mine said the next time
he was leaked information, he'd have to
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00:18:59,900 --> 00:19:01,220
think before using it.
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00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:07,880
And then I realized that's exactly what
you want, to keep us at heel.
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00:19:08,700 --> 00:19:13,180
Well, gentlemen, I don't know if you
realize this, but we recently marked the
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00:19:13,180 --> 00:19:15,100
200th birthday of the First Amendment.
327
00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:16,760
Some birthday.
328
00:19:17,550 --> 00:19:21,710
Federal employees are being pressured to
sign secrecy agreements so that they
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00:19:21,710 --> 00:19:24,790
can't speak or write about their job
without government approval.
330
00:19:25,610 --> 00:19:30,010
Doctors at federally funded clinics can
no longer discuss the option of abortion
331
00:19:30,010 --> 00:19:31,030
with their patients.
332
00:19:31,710 --> 00:19:34,910
Well, as far as I'm concerned, the
party's not over yet.
333
00:19:35,890 --> 00:19:41,270
If I think Senator Sampson is a narrow
-minded misogynist, I can say that.
334
00:19:42,190 --> 00:19:47,300
If I think Senator Law... Rosslyn is a
provincial gas bag? Well, I can say
335
00:19:47,300 --> 00:19:48,300
too.
336
00:19:49,020 --> 00:19:53,640
And if I think this whole proceeding
does nothing more than give you boys a
337
00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:58,700
chance to do some grandstanding and
flagrant self -promotion, well, I won't
338
00:19:58,700 --> 00:20:02,680
that. I'll just say, happy birthday,
First Amendment.
339
00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:04,780
The hearing is now adjourned.
340
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:06,660
Hey, just please clear the room.
341
00:20:08,340 --> 00:20:10,720
Murphy, are you sure about this?
342
00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:12,520
Yes, Miles.
343
00:20:13,120 --> 00:20:14,120
Hey,
344
00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:17,840
Stan, did you hear the one about the
leopard walking through the jungle
345
00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:18,840
elephant droppings?
346
00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:22,460
No. Yeah, he just ate a lawyer. He was
trying to get the taste out of his
347
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:24,880
Well,
348
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:33,900
I can't believe it. Why do we keep
having these hearings? They never work
349
00:20:36,020 --> 00:20:37,020
This is great.
350
00:20:37,100 --> 00:20:40,430
We let her off. We look like bungling
idiots. If we vote to hold her in
351
00:20:40,430 --> 00:20:44,310
contempt, we risk sending a pregnant
woman to jail. We look like heartless
352
00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:48,350
idiots. Well, it's bungling or
heartless. Take your choice, fellas.
353
00:20:48,770 --> 00:20:51,990
Either way, we're picking buckshot out
in our rumps.
354
00:20:53,570 --> 00:20:57,770
Damn. Now I gotta get another spread in
People magazine to show my warm personal
355
00:20:57,770 --> 00:20:58,770
side.
356
00:20:58,990 --> 00:21:02,250
Great. Another picture of me and the
wife singing hymns at the Wurlitzer.
357
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:08,540
Okay, okay, so here's the plan. We
almost recommend finding her in
358
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:11,920
okay? We'll make the vote close. We'll
make it five to four against so we don't
359
00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:12,659
look weak.
360
00:21:12,660 --> 00:21:16,820
All right, now, Lowell, Ned, Warren, and
Richard, you vote for contempt. The
361
00:21:16,820 --> 00:21:17,820
rest of us will go the other way.
362
00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:21,000
Ah, well, let's make the announcement.
363
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:24,600
No, no, no, hold on. Let's just sit on
for a while.
364
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:27,760
I mean, we want to make it look like we
sweated it out.
365
00:21:28,200 --> 00:21:30,140
It's not too long. We want to make the
evening news.
366
00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:38,900
Only one is the funniest.
367
00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:42,880
I'm the single mom. And what? Shut up.
You're so hot. How could that be?
368
00:21:43,180 --> 00:21:44,180
Who will it be?
369
00:21:45,700 --> 00:21:49,680
Watch Nick at Night search for the
funniest mom in America Tuesday at 10
370
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:50,680
Nick at Night.
32033
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