All language subtitles for movieddl.me_W1A.S02E02.1080p.NF.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-WELP_track3_[eng]

Standby, two.
Mix through. Cue on two.

The BBC
has announced the appointment

of ex-head of Olympic
Deliverance, Ian Fletcher,

as its new Head of Values.

Time now
for the Shipping Forecast.

Superimpose.

It's Wednesday at
the BBC's London Headquarters.

All Wednesdays are important
at New Broadcasting House,

and this is no exception.

If there's anything
in particular
His Royal Highness

would like to see or do
whilst he's here,

please let us know, obviously.
Sure, yes.

We know
he doesn't do sweetcorn. No.

Prince Charles's
Private Relations Secretary,
Camilla Ford,

and Clarence House
Head of Hidden Security,
Richard Cartwright,

have both arrived in person
to go through the fine theory

of the forthcoming visit
to the BBC of the heir to
the future throne of England.

This is Camilla.
Right. Hi, Ian Fletcher.

Hi.
Camilla? What are
the chances...

Yeah, no, don't.
Right, okay, no.

And this is
Richard Cartwright.

Ian.
Richard, good to meet you.

Yeah, Dick, really.

Sorry?
Oh, right.

It's Dick really,
not Richard. Yeah.

Right, okay, fine.
Dick actually looks after
the security side of things.

Right, okay. Well,
pretty important guy then.

Yes.
Don't know about that,

I just tag along
most of the time.

Yes, what is it pilots say?

It's actually really boring
until something goes wrong.

Well, exactly, yeah. Yes.

Yes, Dick actually is a pilot.

Right, okay.
Well, I was.

A real one.
Well, yes.

A squadron leader in the RAF.
Right, good.

Well, I mean, shall we just
go in and make a...
Okay, guys?

Ah, right.
All right, okay.

We good?
Hello, Dave.

So, guys, this is...

Dave Green is
the BBC's own Head of Security

at New Broadcasting House.

Camilla. Richard.

Apologies. Well, actually,
technically, I'm not late,

you guys are early,
which is fine,
by the way, but...

Yeah.
We've had an issue with
Huw Edwards this morning,

I can't go into detail,
I'm afraid. Right.

Yeah, it's Dick, by the way.
Sorry, Richard?

It's Dick, not Richard. Yeah.

Fair enough, Richard, noted. Right.

Right. Okay, well, shall we?
Yeah.

Like to start outside,
guys, if that's good
for everyone.

Right.
Yeah.

Dave is not only
responsible for the fail-safe
security system

that completely surrounds
New Broadcasting House,

but also personally devised
much of the Syncopaticurity software

that makes it
theoretically effective

in almost any
theoretical circumstance.

We do operate
a fail-safe, intelligent,

zonal lock-down system
in the building,

whereby in the event
of a problem in one area...

Which there won't be, okay?

...adjacent areas will start
to go into automatic lockdown,

in sequence,
until the entire building
is secure.

Until, or I should say unless,

such time as that process
is manually deselected.

Well, that's good to know.

I believe it's the same system
as used in the White House, Richard.

Is it?
I believe so, yes.

God.
It's Dick.

Dick, yes.
Indeed, apologies,
my mistake, Richard.

Yeah.
Okay, good.

So, once we're happy
the royal vehicles
have arrived and are...

Uh, sorry, I should say
"are arrived"

via Langham Street,

and are secured
in the holding position,

I will seek clearance
from you, Richard,

to move to the live phase
of the operation.

Okay.
Now, assuming you
come back to me

with a "go",
I will at that point

assume control of the
rising bollards personally.

Okay, go.
Thank you, Richard.

Dick.
Yeah, never mind.

Currently, as you can see,

they're in what we call
their secure or raised aspect,

in which aspect,
you could drive

a Bulldog armoured
support vehicle at them

and, I promise you,
you will come off worse.

Right, really?
Oh, right.

That's very...
Excuse me, come off "worst".

Very reassuring.
Yeah, luckily,
I think he'll probably be

in a Range Rover.
Range Rover, yes, absolutely.

Handy thing
about this, Richard,

single Wi-Fi handset
that changes functionality

depending on where
it's detected in the building.

Yeah, I've just got
a Samsung, I'm afraid.

Okay.
But I have got the number of
the RAF in there if I need it.

Right.
Right, okay,
so that's all good.

It's half past 1:00
in the afternoon

and I frankly can't see us
getting this done.

By the end of the day
it's time to go home.

But up on the sixth floor,
PA Izzy Gould

has been asked,
at short-notice,

to somehow watch four series
of Top Gear episodes

and record the occurrence
of certain words
for editorial reasons.

Whoa, Top Gear.
Yes, it's riveting.

Yeah, no, 'cause my sister's
got like a VW Beetle.

Really?
Yeah, but like a new one.
It's pretty cool.

Yes, anyway, at the moment,
they're driving tractors
through Belgium.

Cool.
Well, okay, good luck anyway.

Thanks.
Yeah.

Bye.
Bye.

Will?
Yeah, I don't know.

What?
Well, maybe I could do that.

Well...
Do this?

Yeah, cool.
Uh, well, I mean...

Yes...
I mean, it's supposed to be
done by the end of tomorrow.

Yeah, no worries, yeah. Right.

Well, I suppose if you
actually really want to...
Yeah, I do, yeah.

I mean, I have to say that
would be really... Cool.

Yes.
'Cause to be honest,

I'm not sure how much
more of this I can take.

I mean, are you really
sure about this though, Izzy?

'Cause, I mean,
it is quite important
to get this right, isn't it?

Yes.
Yeah, that's okay,
I don't mind.

It's a matter of making a note
of exactly where Jeremy

uses the word "tosser"
in all of these shows.

Okay, cool, yeah,
no worries, "tosser".

I mean, you don't have
to start right now, Will.

Yeah, no, it's cool.

No, 'cause it's like,
I could put it on my CV.

On your CV?
Yeah.

Right.
Cool.

Yes, great.

No, Dan, you mustn't,
you can't just...

Meanwhile,
Producer Lucy Freeman

is on the phone to writer
Dan Sheppard,

following generic
Head of Comedy and/or Drama
Matt Taverner's suggestion

of re-imagining
his Scarborough-based

love story in Walthamstow.

The thing is, if you
give up now, then, what's...

I think I might just end up
throwing myself off a bridge.

What? No, I'm not,
I'm serious.

Well, I don't know.
There are lots of them,

I'll have to ask around
and just decide on one.

Yes, please, any time.
Okay, speak soon.

Okay, bye. Bye. Bye.

Hi.

How are you?
Yes, you know, yes.

Good.
Yes, fine.

Right.

Doors opening.

Walthamstow?
I know, I know.

That's a bit of a stretch
from Scarborough, isn't it?

I finally get a meeting
with Matt Taverner
to talk about it.

I've been trying
to see him for, like, days.

So, it's supposed
to be 7:00,

so I hang around,
then I get this email
just now.

He can't make it. Right.

He's got to go to
some silent opera
with Alan Yentob,

which he must have known
all along.

Yes.
Doors opening.

I just feel really guilty
about Dan, you know?
Yes.

He's up there in Wetherby,
he's had to move out,

he's living with
his old English teacher.

Right.
And I'm the one
who's been telling him

to have faith all the time.
Well, no, that's...

I'm sorry,
I'm going on about it.
No, I asked.

It's just been
one of those days.

I mean, living with
your old English teacher... Yes.

That's never good.

From the sound of it, though,
from everything you say,
none of this is your fault.

I know you shouldn't
let this stuff get to you,

but sometimes it's just... Yes.

No, the thing is,
I know it's all to do

with this new
"Director of Thingy"
job really.

Right.
Matt's applying for it,
I know he is.

That's what it's all about.

Hang on, what new job?

What?
Director of what?

No. I mean, I don't know.

What?

Right, okay.

It's another day
at a different time,

and Siobhan has come over
from Perfect Curve

to bring
The Way Ahead task force
up to speed

with exactly where
the BBC Wimbledon brand

mash-up is currently at.

Right, okay,
can we stop this now?

Sure.
Yes.

Go, Andy!
Yes.

Brilliant.

Okay, the next one's so cool.

So, like, all the balls will
have the BBC logo on them. Right.

So you can keep this,
I don't want it.

Brilliant. Brilliant.
Siobhan, I...

I'm not being picky
or anything,
'cause I'm not like that,

but I can't help noticing
what I can only describe

as a bit of
a spelling mistake here.

Yeah.
Nuh-uh.

Yes, I'm afraid so.
Yeah, it's "Wimbledon".

De nada. Jesus.

No, I hate to say this,
Siobhan, it is Wimbledon,
I'm afraid,

not "Win-bledon".

Not any more, it isn't.

Oh, right. Here we go.

BBC "Win-bledon".

Right.
Duh!

Right, okay, I see, you've...

It's a totally cool idea.

It's a win-win situation
for like, the BBC

and Wimbledon. Bollocks.

Right, well...
360-degree winsomeness.

What?
We can come back to
the mash-up idea in a moment,

I mean,
if we actually have to. Sure.

But one thing we absolutely
do need to get right

is the whole, you know...

No matter
how mashed up

BBC Win-bledon now is
as a concept,

Ian is keen to talk
about something else.

In this case,
the sensitive issue
of possible monohogeneity

in the BBC's coverage
of lawn tennis.

I just think that
in the context of renewal,

addressing this issue properly

is something
that's going to be critical.

The fact is,
Wimbledon is something...

Win-bledon. BBC Win-bledon.

...is something that
we do well, but the fact is

we should be looking at ways
of doing it better than well.

Yes, no. Very good, Anna.
That's been my point
all along.

No, really honestly, fabulous.
Right. Well...

Okay, so, three words, guys.

"Jo", "Wilfried" and "Tsonga".

Right.
Brilliant.

Jo-Wilfried Tsonga?
Sure.

Okay.

But it turns out
that the team at Perfect Curve

have already been
thinking about the idea

of augmenting
the BBC Wimbledon team

with new commentators,
or experts,

who are ethnically
not so much white.

This is a person?
Yes.

Yeah, he's French, yeah.
Super good.

They've discovered
that there's someone called
Jo-Wilfried Tsonga

who's currently ranked
number 12 in the world.

And what's more, at tennis.

Okay, yes, good.
So, his mum's like French
and his dad's like whatever.

Yes, no, I'm not being funny
or anything,

but I play a bit
of tennis myself.

You do?
Yes.

Christ.
Not at that standard,
Neil, obviously.

And I've got to say,

Jo-Wilfried Tsonga is
actually good news
for the game.

Sure.
So, wait a minute,

you're actually
in contact with him?

We love Jo-Wilfried.
He's one cool dude.

What I like about him,
he's an athletic player, obviously,

especially on grass,

but the great thing about him
is he actually smiles. Yes.

Cool girlfriend. Yeah.

So, Siobhan... Sure.

Just to be...
Yep, no, sure.

You've actually...
No, sure, yeah.

Sorry, I am going to ask
you this question, I'm afraid.

No, I'm too good for that.
Just to be clear,
what you're saying is,

you're in contact with
Jo-Wilfried Tsonga about this.

No, what it is, is,
how it works,

we just need an "in"
with, like, his people

and then we're totally
all set with this.
An "in with his people"?

Sure, and then
we're totally good to go.

Right. Okay.
Oh, right.

Guys, this is
what we do, okay?

Bollocks.
Either nut up here,

or get off the bus
at Loser's Creek.

Yeah, brilliant. Brilliant.

Fabulous.

Whoa.

Whoa, cool.

Hi, Will.
What?

Oh, hey, yeah.
Hey, Izzy, hey, yeah.

How's it going?
Yeah, no, it's pretty cool.

Meanwhile,
after many hours
of careful observation,

Will has almost completed
his task of watching

four years' worth
of Top Gear shows

and counting the number
of "tossers".

Twenty-seven?
Yeah, 27, yeah,

and that's exactly
where they all happened.

Right, that's really
great, Will.
So where are the time codes?

Yeah, no, what? Say again?

We need to know exactly
where he uses the words
so they can do the edit.

He says it once,
like in Bulgaria.

No, but that's what
the time codes are for.

Yeah, another time they're,
like, in a car park.

Yeah, yeah.

God, Will...
Yeah, no worries,
it's my own fault.

So near, yet so far.

Yeah, I'm not gonna
put this on my CV.

At last,
after all the planning,

it's two weeks later,

and it's the day
of the royal visit.

Oh, God.
Oh, hi, Lucy.

David, I didn't see you there.

No, I know.
I mean, what are you doing?

My God,
you look sensational, Lucy.

Well, no, thank you...
I love what that dress
does to your hips.

My hips?
Have you got a moment?

I was gonna ask you
if you might be able
to do me a favour.

David, this isn't...
I need to be...

No, no, no, only
if you can be bothered, Lucy,

and only if the situation
arises, obviously.

But I was gonna ask you
if you'd be able
to give him this.

What?
No, no, I know.

I mean, I'd do it myself,
but I'm not included
in the party.

Is this a joke?
What it is, is,

I'm developing this show,
Family Face-Off for Anna...

David, I am not giving
Prince Charles your card.

And it's basically,
each week, it's like...

I don't care, I am not giving
Prince Charles your card.

And it would just be
such a great thing
for like all of us

if he agreed to be
a part of it.

Yes.
And that's all
I'm thinking about here.

Yes, but, I'm sorry,
I'm not doing it.
That's ridiculous.

Do you want to think
about it, Lucy?
No.

No, okay.
No, I don't.

No, I'll just leave it
with you anyway, Lovely Lucy.

Okay, copy that.
And we are amber here, guys.

I say again,
amber, amber, amber.

With Prince Charles
due to arrive at midday,

by 11:40, there are only
20 minutes left to go,

and the royal greeting party
is gathering

up in the Director General's
outer office.

Just to say, guys, the royal
convoy has left Clarence House

and is now inbound
in to us here.

Right.
All righty.

Thanks, Dave.
Right. Here we go.

Yes.
I've asked Lucy Freeman to
be down in reception already

just to keep an eye
on things down there.

Good-o.
So, guys, we are all set.

Everyone is aware
that this of all days is a day

where absolutely nothing
can go wrong.

I'll just step in,
shall I, Alice?

And give Tony a prod?
Okay, fine.

I mean, I'm sure he's ready,
but sometimes

he can get himself
into a frankly unnecessary

last-minute state
about his hair.

Hi, yes, only me.

Ready when you are, Mr McGill.

Right. Good.

Yeah, hi. Go ahead.

Okay. Right. Where?

Not being funny
or anything, Ian,

but I don't mind saying
I am going to need a loo
at some point

before I meet
His Royal Highness.
Yes. Right. Okay.

Okay, no, I've got eyes on it.

It's the same
when I get on an aeroplane,
I don't know why it is.

Yes, no, well...
Okay, no.

Okay, yep.

Okay, shut it down.

What?
I say again, shut it down.

9:30, Thursday.
I've got you in.

Perfect. Bye.

Hi, Will.
Oh, yeah, hi. No, nothing.

So, I'm going now?
All right, okay. Going where?

Yeah, I know, I don't mind.
What?

But even though
it's a royal day for the BBC
in general,

it's not such a good day
for Will.

Yeah, no, 'cause like,
they rejected my CV.

Yeah, like, they said
aeroplanes wasn't really
a skill.

Oh, no, but that's...

Aeroplanes?
Yeah, I know, crap.

Yeah, bad luck.

Oh, Will, no.

The BBC
HR Department has
thrown out Will's application

for the post of assistant
to the Head of Values.

Thanks for...
It's been great
to have you around.

Yeah.
And, you know,
good luck with...

Yeah, no.
Good luck.

Yeah, thanks. Yeah, you, too.

Yeah, bye!
Okay, cool.

Um...
What?

Would... Can I like,
take a picture of you?

Uh, yeah, I mean...

Okay, cool.
I mean, where do you want me?

What?
Yeah, that's... Say again.
No worries, yeah, cool.

Here?

Yeah, no, crap, hang on.

No...
Shall I?

Yeah, no.
Do you want a hand?

It's my own fault.
I'll take it.

Crap.
No, Jack.

It's all right.
I'll take both of you. Well...

Say again. Here.

You're in "photos",
not "camera".

Yeah, I know, crap.

So, who's this?

No, Jack, don't.
It's okay, I'm just...

Give it back.
Yeah, that's my sister.

Wow. Nice sister. Yeah.

Jack!
It's okay, I'm going
to take it.

Jack, no!
Who's this?

Come on, it's Will's,
give it back.

No, who's this
with your sister?
Jack! Give it to me.

See?

This is your sister?
Yeah, she does
water-skiing sometimes.

She's really good.

Will, I don't mean to pry...
Oh, I do.

Yeah, no, that's okay.
No, I really do.

So, who actually
is that with her?

Oh, yeah, that's JW, yeah.
He's pretty cool.

JW?
Yeah, Jo-Wilfried, yeah.

Jo-Wilfried?
Yeah.

Right.
See?

So, guys, this is going
to get busy.

We've got a suspicious
object in the plaza.
What?

Okay, no.

But suddenly,
as can sometimes happen

on days when nothing
can go wrong, it does.

Suspicious object. What?

No, three.
Outside in the plaza.

Yeah, okay, copy that. Siobhan.

What?
I'm sorry, guys,
we are in live lockdown.

Siobhan.
Okay, no.

Oh, bloody great!

Who else would be carrying
a rucksack with Sue Barker's
head on it?

I say again,
we are in live lockdown.

Gonna have to ask you
to stay where you are.

No, but I know who that is.

Excuse me?
I don't know what
the hell she's doing here,

but I definitely know
whose bag that is.

I'm sorry, Ian, the world
is full of rucksacks

with Sue Barker's
face on them.

Well, but... No, it isn't!
Also...

That's a ridiculous
thing to say.

Also, it doesn't look right.

Well, that's neither
here nor...

Apparently, they've spelled
Wimbledon wrong.

God.
Now, in my world
that's a big red flag.

No, that's deliberate.
What is?

"BBC Win-bledon."

It's, uh... It's supposed to
look like that. Yes.

Look, sorry, guys...
Her name is Siobhan Sharpe.
She's a PR, she's...

Brand BBC consultant.
Yes, exactly, yes. I've got
her number in my phone.

You're telling me
she's with us today.

Well, I mean...
No, she's bloody not.

No, she...
I'm sorry, Ian. This is
nothing to do with her.

Look, Tracey...
Yes, can she just shut up?

Your sister taught
Jo-Wilfried Tsonga
to water-ski?

Yeah, I know. Yeah. Brilliant.

Yeah, he didn't really
want to.

She was an instructor in,
I don't know,

like, the Caribbean one year.
Like, it was really hot.

But he wasn't supposed to
water-ski because of,
like, his tennis.

But she made him anyway.

Meanwhile, Izzy and
Jack are coming to terms with

the possibility that Will
may have managed
to find a solution

to the BBC's Wimbledon problem

by accidentally
having a sister.

Yeah, so now, like,
when he plays at Wimbledon
they all come and stay.

What do you mean stay?
Stay where?

Jo-Wilfred Tsonga comes
and stays at your house?

In Wimbledon?
Is that where you live?

Yeah. I have to sleep
in, like, above the garage
for, like, a fortnight.

But that's okay,
it's pretty cool up there.

He's such a cool guy.
Utterly fucking brilliant.

And one time he tried
to teach me, like, a backhand,

but my mother left the
bedroom window closed and...

Attention,
this is a security alert.

Code seven. I say again,
code seven, Cafe Nero.

Basically, no one leaves or...

No, seven. Code seven.

No, "Cafe Nero" is, like,
the name of the cafe.

With the heir
to the throne minutes away

and fast approaching, fast,

Dave Green knows
he can't afford to take a risk
of any kind,

whether it's a risk or not.

So, what we're gonna do, Ian,

I need you
to be clear on this,

we've got this individual
under control,

but we're gonna have to...

Attention,
this is a security alert.

Right, okay.
That's okay, guys.

That's normal.
Normal?

So, the fact is,
can somebody open those?

So, what I'm gonna ask you
to do, Ian...
I can't believe this.

Can we turn that thing off?

After following up
Ian's potential lead, someone
has been discovered

in the cafe claiming to fit
Siobhan's description

and Dave has had an idea
for verifying her identity.

Okay, let's do it.
I'll put her
on speaker phone.

What do you want me
to say to her?
Excuse me?

What do you want me
to say to her?

So, you're going to ask her

to confirm her identity
to you.

I know who she is,
I can see her.

Yeah, no.
That's definitely Siobhan.

You guys are
in serious shit. Let me go.

Siobhan. Hi, it's Ian.

Ian, what the fuck?

I know this is completely
ridiculous, but...

Let go of my arm, fuck face.
Okay?

Siobhan, I'm going to ask you
to confirm who you are to me.

What is this?
Some weird shit?

No, we have to do this.

I have to ask you
to confirm your identity.

You have to tell me
who you are.

You just said it.
It's me! What the fuck?

Who do you think it is?
Like, Hillary fucking Clinton?

This is a security alert.
Enough?

Attention,
this is a security alert.

Okay. And we are
code two clear,
all zones reset on this.

I say again. Clear all zones.
Reset, reset, reset.

Right. Thank God.
Let's get on with this.

Okay, guys,
I do need the loo now.

The fact is, this door
needs to be open.

Yeah, just resetting now.
Okay, good.

So, the building knows exactly
where this handset is
and depending on...

We haven't got
much time, Dave.

Fair enough. Point taken, Ian.

Okay, good.

Okay.

Locked.

Ah, okay.
All right.

For God's sake, Dave!

Okay, no. I'm sorry.
Guys, I really do need
to get out.

Okay, I know what I did there.

Yes. No, they're here.
I think he's actually arrived.

Right.
But where actually are you?

What do you mean,
you can't get out?

It'll be fine, Lucy.
Don't panic.

This will all be okay.
All right?

Because it will be.
It has to be.

I am trying.
Reset, reset, reset.

Yes, and in the meantime,
you just stay there...

They're not
bloody open, okay?

No, they're not.
They're locked.

Richard. Hi, morning.
How are you?

A few minutes early,
but we're ready
when you are.

Yeah, but in the meantime
just to check,
the bollard situation?

Yeah, they're up. Yeah.

So, we didn't go down
the Bulldog armoured vehicle
route in the end,

but presumably
you're across that.

Okay, will do. Yeah, yeah.

He's here, okay.
He's outside now.
He's arrived.

Tony says there should be
a fail-safe button
on his side somewhere.

Ah, okay. Well, that's...

Yes.
No, there isn't one.

Ah.
But he says there should be.

Right, yes.
Basically, they're not
very happy through there,

I don't think. No.

So, now. Command,
control, shift, escape.
Yeah, no. Do this now...

Escape?
So, get out of
"Security Options",

back to "Zonal Preferences",
and... No, do this now.

Okay, so try
reopening "Controls"

from "System Start-up"
but holding down "Alt-Shift".

You did? And what happened?

Right.

Have you tried unplugging
it at the mains?

Where does this go?

Oh, that leads through into
Old Broadcasting House,
I think.

Right.
Or, it used to at one time.

Doesn't open?
No.

No. Course not.
I've never seen it open.

I'm not even sure
if it's even a real...

Oh, okay.

Right.

That's interesting.

Right. Okay.

Okay, great.
All right. Okay.

And we are "status active"
here, guys. I say again...

No, Dave. I'm sorry,
would you mind?

Yeah, I...
It's just I can't think.

Yeah, I just...
No, please. Shut up.

The BBC
royal greeting party
may have finally broken free,

but they now have
just seven minutes left

until they're due
to be greeting,

and no time to worry
about detail.

Right. Okay. Let's go.
Hang on, guys.

Not being funny or anything,
but what about Tony?

Ah, right. Yes.

Tony who?
Tony Hall.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
And Simon.

Yes.
I mean, are we just
leaving them

in there, or waiting, or what?

Right.
The fact is, Prince Charles
is here to be met,

and somebody's
got to meet him.

I mean, why don't we keep
going for the moment and see

what happens with that one?
Yes, exactly.

All right, okay. Yes.

Because there
already was
a Broadcasting House

when New Broadcasting House
was literally built onto
the side of it,

the decision was made
to call one of them
Old Broadcasting House

to avoid any possible
chance of confusion.

But even though they may be
only feet away from where
they need to be,

in another sense
they're decades away.

And the one thing
they don't have is time.

Dave, hi.
How's it looking?

Yeah, no.
Great, Richard.

Okay, no. Just so you know,
we're still looking at quite
a lot of bollard here, so...

Yes, no. Understood, Richard.
We have eyes on that.

You okay?
You sound like you're running.

As I say, we're coming at you
and we are standby for "go".

I say again, standby for "go".

Oh, God.
Have we been
here before?

I don't know. Yes.

Guys, can I just...
No, shut up.

Just see what happens
in here.

Ah, right. Good.
Sorry, how do we get back to
New Broadcasting House?

NBH?
Reception, yes.

We're in a bit of hurry.

Okay.
Yes.

It's back that way.

Really?
No, it isn't.

We've just come from there.
Try that way.

That way?
Yeah.

Right. Thank you.
Yes, thank you.

Yeah, no.

Ah, right.
Okay, no. I'm sorry.

Bloody hell.

The fact is, we've gone
further backwards in time. Yes.

Guys, what we need here
is to go forwards.
Yes, all right.

Just to say, Ian,
four minutes.
Yes, thanks, Dave.

Shut up.
Yeah, I say again, guys,
four minutes...

No, I'm sorry. Shut up.
Well, I'm gonna keep
going down.

Right.
At least then we'll
end up on the ground floor.

Right.
Yeah, understood.

Yes, good.

Reception!
What?

Reception,
there's a sign!

This is good, guys.
This is good.

Okay.
Okay, no.

Right, that's it.

Okay. So, guys,
this is wrong...
Shut up.

I don't care, it's fine.
I say again,
this is the wrong...

No, shut up.
We'll have to go out the
front and walk round.

With three minutes
to spare,

they've managed to find
their way to the
wrong reception.

But in theory,
it's just 200 yards

from Old Broadcasting House
to New Broadcasting House

where the royal convoy
is still waiting to arrive.

Hi, guys.
Yes, hi.

Can I help you, sir?
Yes. We're in
a bit of a hurry.

We need to get round
to the other reception.

That's not really possible,
I'm afraid, sir.
We have a VIP visitor inbound.

Yes, no. I know.
We're meeting him.

I'm sorry, sir, we are
in live lockdown.
But we're meeting him.

Right. Okay. Sorry, guys.

It's thanks partly
to Dave himself that
the foolproof

zonal lockdown system
is designed to favour

neither man nor fool equally.

This is a code seven.
Exceptional circumstances.

We are code two,
live lockdown, sir.
Right, listen.

Right, okay. Forget it.

Ian, hi. Where are you?

So, there's a security guy,
a royal security guy,
Richard Cartwright...

Yes?
He's probably outside.

Uh, yes, I think
I can see him.

Hi.

Yeah, hi, yes.
It's Lucy Freeman, hi.

Right. And you are?
I just... I work with...

I basically...
Yeah, never mind.

What the hell's going
on in there?
Yes, no. They're coming now.

I mean, I'm here already,
so that's one,

and the others
are just grouping up
before they arrive.

Grouping up?
Yes.

What are they?
The bloody Red Arrows?

Yes, I know. Yes.

Hello? Hello?

Ian?
Hello?

Ah!
I'm sorry, Ian.
I did go to the loo.

Right.
I think it's probably
the excitement.

Yes. So...
Through here.

Christ!
I know. It was a fluke, okay?

But this leads right
out into...
Right. Yes, no. I know.

I'm not being funny
or anything, but she can't
half shift in those heels.

But then I did actually
go in a helicopter once.

Right.
I didn't like it.

No.
Yes.

Right, okay.
Okay. This is good, guys.

Okay? I say again,
this is good.
Can you shut up, please?

No running, okay? No running.

Okay. No running here,
guys. Okay? No running.

What happened?
No, I can't,
it doesn't matter.

Are you okay?
Yes, I'm...

Yes, he's fine.
Guys, are we in a "go" state?

Any news of Tony and Simon?

Alice just phoned.
They're still stuck
in his office.

Right.
Right, okay, good.

Okay, let's do it.

Outside, it's now
12:00, which is exactly
the time it's supposed to be.

But Dick Cartwright and
the rest of the royal party

are aware that time
is still passing, literally,
by the minute.

Meanwhile, inside, what's left
of the official greeting party

has at last made it to its
official greeting position.
This is it.

All that's necessary now
is for nothing else
to go wrong.

Hey, guys.

Siobhan!

I made it,
they let me go.

All right.
No. I'm sorry.

So, let's do this.
Let's get royal.

The fact is, this is
not happening.
It totally is.

No, it is not.
No, but there's a list,
I'm afraid, Siobhan.

A list, yes. Yes.

No, sure.
A list went
to Clarence House.

No, sure. I'm on it.

What do you mean,
you're on it?

No, I'm sorry.
You are not, Siobhan.
I mean, how?

It's a list, okay?
I'm on it. QVC.

What?
Right, okay. Fine.

But back outside,
Dave Green has won
his battle

with the last remaining rising
bollard and the visit is
finally under way.

With the royal Range Rover
now in place,

it's time for someone
to come outside and greet it.

The only unknown left now
is exactly who that's
going to be.

I mean,
it should be Ian, surely.

Well, no. I don't...
Just to say,
that's a "go", guys.

Yes, thanks, Dave.

Let's just do this.
The fact is...

No, we really need to...
No, I'm sorry.

Duh!

Right, okay.

Ian Fletcher,
Head of BBC Values.

Your Royal Highness, welcome
to New Broadcasting House.