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1
00:00:02,524 --> 00:00:04,395
- Previously on "Awkward"...
2
00:00:04,395 --> 00:00:05,875
- If you don'’t have a plan
to get this debt taken care of,
3
00:00:05,875 --> 00:00:07,181
you'’re not going back to NYU.
4
00:00:07,181 --> 00:00:08,878
- So what are you guys
celebrating?
5
00:00:08,878 --> 00:00:11,141
- I am moving in with Luke
for the rest of the summer.
6
00:00:11,141 --> 00:00:13,143
You said you wanted
the world to know.
7
00:00:13,143 --> 00:00:14,362
- Not like this.
8
00:00:14,362 --> 00:00:15,450
- Luke!
A moment?
9
00:00:20,324 --> 00:00:21,456
- If you'’re happy with the work
10
00:00:21,456 --> 00:00:23,588
that I'’m doing,
then that'’s one thing--
11
00:00:23,588 --> 00:00:25,068
- Publicly declaring
my love for Luke
12
00:00:25,068 --> 00:00:26,852
was supposed to be
an epic gesture,
13
00:00:26,852 --> 00:00:29,464
but had somehow
turned into an epic fail.
14
00:00:29,464 --> 00:00:32,162
And now he was in Lizzy'’s
office running damage control.
15
00:00:32,162 --> 00:00:34,034
He'’d been in there
for 26 minutes.
16
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:36,123
How much damage
was there to control anyway?
17
00:00:36,123 --> 00:00:37,907
I had to wonder
if there was more
18
00:00:37,907 --> 00:00:39,735
to Luke'’s relationship
with Lizzy than he had told me.
19
00:00:39,735 --> 00:00:40,910
- You shouldn'’t have
written that article
20
00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:41,998
without consulting me,Jenna.
21
00:00:41,998 --> 00:00:44,087
It was a violation of trust.
22
00:00:44,087 --> 00:00:46,481
And now Lizzy'’s really upset.
- Yeah.
23
00:00:46,481 --> 00:00:48,265
A little too upset,
if you ask me.
24
00:00:48,265 --> 00:00:49,875
What is she, jealous?
25
00:00:49,875 --> 00:00:51,877
- She thinks I'’ve been lying
and secretive.
26
00:00:51,877 --> 00:00:53,923
- Well, you have been lying
and secretive.
27
00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:55,359
- You have no idea how hard
it'’s gonna be
28
00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:56,578
for me to smooth things over
with her.
29
00:00:56,578 --> 00:00:58,493
- How do you plan to do that?
30
00:00:58,493 --> 00:01:00,712
Sleep with her?
- Grow up, Jenna.
31
00:01:00,712 --> 00:01:03,454
I need some air.
32
00:01:03,454 --> 00:01:05,195
- Grow up?
33
00:01:05,195 --> 00:01:07,023
Grow up?
- You'’re acting like a child.
34
00:01:07,023 --> 00:01:09,156
- I am not, jerk!Lookit.
35
00:01:09,156 --> 00:01:11,897
You'’re just pissed because
Lizzy has a thing for you,
36
00:01:11,897 --> 00:01:13,943
and you wanted her to think
that she'’s got a shot
37
00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:15,423
so that you can stay
teacher'’s pet.
38
00:01:15,423 --> 00:01:17,381
- If that'’s what you think
of me,
39
00:01:17,381 --> 00:01:19,427
what are you even doing with me?
- Honestly, I don'’t even know.
40
00:01:19,427 --> 00:01:23,170
I'’m leaving.
41
00:01:23,170 --> 00:01:24,519
- So go!
- I am!
42
00:01:24,519 --> 00:01:26,086
But I know
you need the car later.
43
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,914
So I am leaving
as soon as the bus gets here.
44
00:01:30,307 --> 00:01:32,092
[keys clacking]
45
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,963
[booming thud]
46
00:01:33,963 --> 00:01:34,964
[door opens]
47
00:01:34,964 --> 00:01:36,226
- Morning, beeyotch!
48
00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:37,880
I brought you
a $5 cup of coffee
49
00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:39,577
in case you were homesick
for New York.
50
00:01:39,577 --> 00:01:41,753
- You can'’t buy me back
that easily.
51
00:01:41,753 --> 00:01:43,320
After what you said to me?
52
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:45,670
Your cuppa joe
is a cuppa joke.
53
00:01:45,670 --> 00:01:47,150
- Are you seriously
still mad about that?
54
00:01:47,150 --> 00:01:49,587
We had a little fight.
Real friends get past those.
55
00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:51,981
- Real friends don'’t say
mean things in the first place.
56
00:01:51,981 --> 00:01:54,026
You called me
an annoying dumbass.
57
00:01:54,026 --> 00:01:55,724
- And you called me
an ass[bleep].
58
00:01:55,724 --> 00:01:57,117
And I'’m fine with it!
59
00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:58,727
I get called
an ass[bleep] all the time!
60
00:01:58,727 --> 00:02:00,729
- I'’m going to have to do
God-knows-what
61
00:02:00,729 --> 00:02:03,819
to get myself out of debt,
and you don'’t even seem to care!
62
00:02:03,819 --> 00:02:05,603
What hurts the most
63
00:02:05,603 --> 00:02:07,736
is that I actually thought
we were friends since New York.
64
00:02:07,736 --> 00:02:09,520
Say what you want about Jenna,
65
00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:11,827
but she would never
treat me that way.
66
00:02:11,827 --> 00:02:14,090
- Okay, that was way meaner
than "ass[bleep]."
67
00:02:14,090 --> 00:02:15,961
So you'’re really
not gonna forgive me?
68
00:02:15,961 --> 00:02:18,181
Lissa always forgives me
when I treat her like crap.
69
00:02:18,181 --> 00:02:20,444
It'’s kind of my thing.
- I'’m not Lissa.
70
00:02:20,444 --> 00:02:21,924
And I don'’t understand
71
00:02:21,924 --> 00:02:24,013
why you would want to treat
any friend like crap.
72
00:02:24,013 --> 00:02:27,364
I will accept your coffee,
but not your apology.
73
00:02:27,364 --> 00:02:32,239
- ♪ Warm days gone cold
74
00:02:32,239 --> 00:02:33,109
♪ Please say you--
75
00:02:33,109 --> 00:02:34,719
- As recently as yesterday,
76
00:02:34,719 --> 00:02:37,679
living with Luke made me
feel so adult,
77
00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:39,115
so then why today
did fighting with Luke
78
00:02:39,115 --> 00:02:40,551
make me just want my mom?
79
00:02:40,551 --> 00:02:42,727
Mom?
80
00:02:42,727 --> 00:02:44,076
Anyone home?
81
00:02:44,076 --> 00:02:46,427
Okay.
82
00:02:46,427 --> 00:02:48,516
If I couldn'’t have my mom,
83
00:02:48,516 --> 00:02:50,300
at least I could have
my mom'’s clean sheets.
84
00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:52,520
Living with Luke
had meant feeling grown up,
85
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:54,957
but it had also meant going
without the comforts of home.
86
00:02:54,957 --> 00:02:57,264
- ♪ Last night
when night fell ♪
87
00:02:57,264 --> 00:03:00,354
- Three flavors of ice cream.
88
00:03:00,354 --> 00:03:03,270
A sink free
of little shaving hairs.
89
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:04,967
Backup toilet paper.
90
00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:07,012
Conditioner.
Who doesn'’t use conditioner?
91
00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:09,058
It also meant I'’d missed
a lot of mail.
92
00:03:09,058 --> 00:03:11,016
"Camp Pookah.
93
00:03:11,016 --> 00:03:13,628
"After 57 years, Camp Pookah
is closing its doors.
94
00:03:13,628 --> 00:03:15,630
"All alumni are invited
95
00:03:15,630 --> 00:03:18,546
"to one last field day
on the campgrounds.
96
00:03:18,546 --> 00:03:21,897
$20 registration fee must
be received no later than--"
97
00:03:21,897 --> 00:03:23,681
Today?
98
00:03:23,681 --> 00:03:25,074
Crap.
99
00:03:25,074 --> 00:03:26,728
- Since when
are we doing hydrangeas?
100
00:03:26,728 --> 00:03:28,512
They cost more than the lilies.
101
00:03:28,512 --> 00:03:30,688
- They cost a little more,
but they last twice as long.
102
00:03:30,688 --> 00:03:33,474
And some members were allergic
to the lilies.
103
00:03:33,474 --> 00:03:35,954
So I'’m saving you money
and cutting down on complaints.
104
00:03:35,954 --> 00:03:38,305
- Oh, well,
you should have asked me.
105
00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:39,828
- If you want to go back
to the lilies--
106
00:03:39,828 --> 00:03:41,221
- No, it'’s fine.
They'’re already here.
107
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:42,570
- I thought we could use
the extra money
108
00:03:42,570 --> 00:03:44,485
towards new hand dryers
in the bathrooms.
109
00:03:44,485 --> 00:03:46,182
- I don'’t pay you
to think, Rosati.
110
00:03:46,182 --> 00:03:47,749
Meet me in the snack bar
when you'’re done here.
111
00:03:47,749 --> 00:03:50,708
Rosa found a mouse skull
in the popcorn machine.
112
00:03:50,708 --> 00:03:52,275
- [gasps]
Pretty flowers, Jake!
113
00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:53,798
Hey, is there any way
114
00:03:53,798 --> 00:03:55,496
you could pick up Mrs. Taylor
at her house?
115
00:03:55,496 --> 00:03:57,280
Her engine died and she can'’t
make it to my class.
116
00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:59,456
- I don'’t have time for that.
I got a million things to do.
117
00:03:59,456 --> 00:04:01,632
- Well, we all have our crosses
to bear, Jake.
118
00:04:01,632 --> 00:04:03,547
- Managing this club
is a demanding job.
119
00:04:03,547 --> 00:04:05,288
Why does no one
appreciate that?
120
00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:08,248
- No, literally, my new class
is called "Cross Fit."
121
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:11,468
We all bear crosses on our back
while doing core exercises.
122
00:04:11,468 --> 00:04:13,165
I already bought
all the crosses,
123
00:04:13,165 --> 00:04:15,080
and if no one shows,
I won'’t meet my profit goal.
124
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,604
- I can'’t leave,
125
00:04:16,604 --> 00:04:18,997
but maybe I could record you
teaching the class
126
00:04:18,997 --> 00:04:21,304
on my phone and then email
the video to Mrs. Taylor.
127
00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:22,914
- Great!
[giggles]
128
00:04:22,914 --> 00:04:25,221
Could you also send one
to Mrs. Yoo, Mr. Churchill?
129
00:04:25,221 --> 00:04:26,962
Oh, and Selma Froder is in
Florida, she might want one--
130
00:04:26,962 --> 00:04:29,921
- Why don'’t I just upload it
to YouTube,
131
00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,271
and then whoever who wants
the link can have it?
132
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:32,750
- That is so smart.
133
00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:34,099
That way I can reach
so many more people.
134
00:04:34,099 --> 00:04:36,667
Thank you, Jakey.
135
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,930
Good gosh, just think
of what Jesus could'’ve done
136
00:04:38,930 --> 00:04:41,063
if he'’d had YouTube.
137
00:04:43,544 --> 00:04:45,807
- You are going to smile,
138
00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:47,722
and you are going to take this
139
00:04:47,722 --> 00:04:49,811
like the grown-ass woman
that you are.
140
00:04:49,811 --> 00:04:51,508
I know these heels are high.
141
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,336
I know this is degrading.
142
00:04:53,336 --> 00:04:56,818
And you don'’t belong
in some strange hotel room.
143
00:04:56,818 --> 00:04:59,777
But you need the money,
so you'’re gonna suck it up,
144
00:04:59,777 --> 00:05:02,563
and close your eyes
if you need to.
145
00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:05,479
[exhales]
146
00:05:05,479 --> 00:05:08,482
[upbeat pop music]
147
00:05:08,482 --> 00:05:10,135
♪
148
00:05:10,135 --> 00:05:13,008
- Thank you so much for
filling in at the last minute.
149
00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:16,098
What maid of honor gets
taken down by strep throat?
150
00:05:16,098 --> 00:05:17,708
More like maid of dishonor.
151
00:05:17,708 --> 00:05:19,797
- It'’s my pleasure.
152
00:05:19,797 --> 00:05:22,191
- I honestly didn'’t even know
professional bridesmaids
153
00:05:22,191 --> 00:05:24,280
were a thing until
my wedding planner suggested it.
154
00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:26,500
- Jennifer
was a disaster anyway.
155
00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:29,851
She didn'’t even get a spray tan
for the rehearsal dinner.
156
00:05:29,851 --> 00:05:31,983
If you ask me,
she deserved strep.
157
00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:34,551
- Well, now I have someone
that I can order around,
158
00:05:34,551 --> 00:05:36,727
and I don'’t have to feel bad
about it because I'’m paying you.
159
00:05:36,727 --> 00:05:38,163
- Don'’t worry about a thing.
160
00:05:38,163 --> 00:05:40,165
I'’m a nuptials ninja,
161
00:05:40,165 --> 00:05:42,211
and I will make sure everything
goes off without a hitch.
162
00:05:42,211 --> 00:05:44,387
Speaking of which,
it'’s time for pictures.
163
00:05:44,387 --> 00:05:47,259
Bring in the groomsmen!
164
00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:48,870
Grease up those smiles,
people.
165
00:05:48,870 --> 00:05:51,046
You got a long day
of posing ahead of you.
166
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,093
Find your bridesmaid.
Find your groomsmen.
167
00:05:55,093 --> 00:05:58,227
You'’re over there.
Just like we practiced, okay?
168
00:05:58,227 --> 00:06:00,098
All right, guys, smile.
Look alive.
169
00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:01,926
You'’re the wedding party,
not the wedding funeral.
170
00:06:01,926 --> 00:06:05,452
♪
171
00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:08,585
- Tamara?
172
00:06:08,585 --> 00:06:10,500
- A camp reunion seemed
like the perfect way
173
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,720
to self-soothe
after my fight with Luke.
174
00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,549
I just hoped it wasn'’t too late
to act like a kid again.
175
00:06:15,549 --> 00:06:17,115
I needed a return to myself,
176
00:06:17,115 --> 00:06:19,857
a return to home
and happiness and security.
177
00:06:19,857 --> 00:06:21,990
A return to...
178
00:06:21,990 --> 00:06:23,252
Matty?
179
00:06:23,252 --> 00:06:25,602
- Jenna.
Hey!
180
00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:34,872
- Well, I'’ve been ignoringmy mail.
181
00:06:34,872 --> 00:06:37,092
What'’s your excuse
for signing up late?
182
00:06:37,092 --> 00:06:39,529
- I wasn'’t gonna go.
I mean, it'’s Camp Pookah.
183
00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:41,575
- Oh, come on,
you loved this place.
184
00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:44,665
- I know, but it'’s in the past.
Why get all nostalgic about it?
185
00:06:44,665 --> 00:06:47,668
But then I broke up with Sully
and figured, "What the hell?"
186
00:06:47,668 --> 00:06:50,888
- You broke up with Sully?
Sorry.
187
00:06:50,888 --> 00:06:53,108
- Don'’t act surprised.
- I liked her.
188
00:06:53,108 --> 00:06:54,718
- Once you realized
she didn'’t hate you.
189
00:06:54,718 --> 00:06:56,024
- True.
190
00:06:56,024 --> 00:06:58,548
Luke and I got in this
huge fight this morning,
191
00:06:58,548 --> 00:07:01,029
and something about
running around Camp Pookah
192
00:07:01,029 --> 00:07:03,379
cracked out on bug juice
just seemed comforting.
193
00:07:03,379 --> 00:07:05,381
- Lot of good times here.
194
00:07:05,381 --> 00:07:06,774
- The past isn'’t all bad,
Matty.
195
00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:08,253
- You want to do something
after this?
196
00:07:08,253 --> 00:07:09,516
Misery loves company.
197
00:07:09,516 --> 00:07:11,126
- You know what misery
loves more?
198
00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:12,910
Frozen yogurt.
199
00:07:12,910 --> 00:07:14,259
- With gummy bears
and those mochi things?
200
00:07:14,259 --> 00:07:15,913
- Mm-hmm.
201
00:07:15,913 --> 00:07:17,349
We could get some
and bitch about our lives.
202
00:07:17,349 --> 00:07:18,916
- Friends do that, right?
- They absolutely do.
203
00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:20,178
- Then let'’s absolutely do that.
204
00:07:20,178 --> 00:07:24,748
♪
205
00:07:24,748 --> 00:07:26,750
- I didn'’t know
you were friends with Kelly.
206
00:07:26,750 --> 00:07:29,753
- I'’m not.
She'’s paying me.
207
00:07:29,753 --> 00:07:31,146
- Wow.
I mean, she is kind of a bitch,
208
00:07:31,146 --> 00:07:33,801
but I figured she at least
had some real friends.
209
00:07:33,801 --> 00:07:35,063
- She'’s not paying me
to be her friend.
210
00:07:35,063 --> 00:07:37,326
She'’s paying me to be her
professional bridesmaid.
211
00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:40,155
Okay, that'’s a wrap
on our first photo call.
212
00:07:40,155 --> 00:07:42,418
There'’s veggie and dip
over on the buffet table.
213
00:07:42,418 --> 00:07:43,811
No broccoli for you, Kelly.
214
00:07:43,811 --> 00:07:47,684
The next few hours
are too important.
215
00:07:47,684 --> 00:07:50,339
- Professional bridesmaid, huh?
216
00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:52,167
So you'’re, like, embedded
with the wedding party?
217
00:07:52,167 --> 00:07:54,386
- I make sure everything
runs according to schedule.
218
00:07:54,386 --> 00:07:56,084
You know how there'’s
seat fillers at the Oscars?
219
00:07:56,084 --> 00:07:58,956
- No.
- I'’m a dress filler for hire.
220
00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,741
- So you'’re like
a hooker for weddings.
221
00:08:00,741 --> 00:08:03,091
- Totes.
And it'’s all thanks to you.
222
00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:05,006
If I was never a fake fiancée,
I would have never amassed
223
00:08:05,006 --> 00:08:07,225
the vast knowledge base
required.
224
00:08:07,225 --> 00:08:09,489
- It'’s so crazy
that we ran into each other.
225
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:13,014
- And like this.
It feels like fate.
226
00:08:13,014 --> 00:08:14,798
- It does.
227
00:08:14,798 --> 00:08:17,845
In fact, I'’ve been meaning
to call you.
228
00:08:17,845 --> 00:08:19,803
- You have?
229
00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:21,805
- You'’re coming
to the reception, right?
230
00:08:21,805 --> 00:08:24,329
- I have to.
Hooker and all that.
231
00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:25,461
But now that I know
you'’re going to be there,
232
00:08:25,461 --> 00:08:26,418
I'’m looking forward to it.
233
00:08:26,418 --> 00:08:28,682
- Me too.
234
00:08:28,682 --> 00:08:31,293
Because I want
to introduce you to Amy.
235
00:08:31,293 --> 00:08:32,250
- Oh, who'’s Amy?
236
00:08:32,250 --> 00:08:34,078
- My fiancée.
237
00:08:34,078 --> 00:08:35,558
- Your what?
238
00:08:35,558 --> 00:08:38,256
[upbeat disco music]
239
00:08:38,256 --> 00:08:41,738
♪♪
240
00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:44,915
- Ab-solve yourself of sin one!
241
00:08:44,915 --> 00:08:47,918
Ab-solve yourself of sin two!
242
00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:50,312
Again!
243
00:08:50,312 --> 00:08:52,009
- What fresh hell is this?
244
00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:54,316
- Cut!
245
00:08:54,316 --> 00:08:56,057
Sadie, can'’t you see
we'’re in the middle of a take?
246
00:08:56,057 --> 00:08:57,711
- Liss, can you
do your Godilates later?
247
00:08:57,711 --> 00:09:01,279
You'’ll never believe how rude
Tamara was to me this morning.
248
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:03,151
- Actually,
I'’m in the middle of something.
249
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:04,456
Can I call you later?
250
00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:05,980
- No one'’s gonna care
if you stop now.
251
00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:07,111
Look, that one'’s
not even breathing.
252
00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:09,766
- Mr. Turner?
253
00:09:09,766 --> 00:09:11,899
Mr. Turner.
He was just on a rest interval.
254
00:09:11,899 --> 00:09:14,336
- Come on,
come get a smoothie with me.
255
00:09:14,336 --> 00:09:15,990
Atonercise is a joke.
256
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:17,295
- Okay, this joke
257
00:09:17,295 --> 00:09:19,123
is actually very popular
with my older clients.
258
00:09:19,123 --> 00:09:20,951
I wouldn'’t expect you
to know this,
259
00:09:20,951 --> 00:09:22,823
not being
a businesswoman yourself,
260
00:09:22,823 --> 00:09:25,695
but retirees are an extremely
profitable demographic.
261
00:09:25,695 --> 00:09:27,654
- You actually think you'’re
gonna make money off this?
262
00:09:27,654 --> 00:09:29,569
- You know what, Sadie?
263
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:31,701
You can'’t ignore me all summer
and then just waltz in here
264
00:09:31,701 --> 00:09:33,660
one day and expect me
to get a smoothie.
265
00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:35,009
- Whoa.
What'’s your damage?
266
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:37,272
- I have recently been awakened
as a feminist.
267
00:09:37,272 --> 00:09:39,448
And I have come to realize
that your friendship
268
00:09:39,448 --> 00:09:41,102
is extremely oppressive.
269
00:09:41,102 --> 00:09:44,540
- Lissa, don'’t take this
the wrong way,
270
00:09:44,540 --> 00:09:46,455
but you'’re a [bleep] moron.
271
00:09:46,455 --> 00:09:48,413
- Stop being
the patriarchy to me!
272
00:09:48,413 --> 00:09:50,415
You'’re always pushing me down!
273
00:09:50,415 --> 00:09:53,636
If you'’re not prepared
to be respectful, you can leave.
274
00:09:53,636 --> 00:09:56,291
- I will then!
275
00:09:56,291 --> 00:09:58,772
♪
276
00:09:58,772 --> 00:09:59,990
- Okay.
277
00:09:59,990 --> 00:10:02,645
- So what was your fight
with Luke about?
278
00:10:02,645 --> 00:10:04,386
- I wrote this thing about him
on Idea Bin.
279
00:10:04,386 --> 00:10:07,171
- Jeez, Jenna, maybe you should
step away from the computer.
280
00:10:07,171 --> 00:10:08,695
- I know, I just thought
I was making
281
00:10:08,695 --> 00:10:10,305
this big romantic gesture.
282
00:10:10,305 --> 00:10:12,089
[cell phone rings]
Ugh, he keeps calling me.
283
00:10:12,089 --> 00:10:14,570
I'’ve been yelled at enough
for one day.
284
00:10:14,570 --> 00:10:16,180
So what happened with Sully?
285
00:10:16,180 --> 00:10:18,748
- She'’s an awesome girl,
just not awesome for me.
286
00:10:18,748 --> 00:10:22,317
She just wouldn'’t go deep
on an emotional level, you know?
287
00:10:22,317 --> 00:10:23,884
She'’s kind of closed off.
288
00:10:23,884 --> 00:10:26,538
- And that'’s a bad thing,
correct?
289
00:10:26,538 --> 00:10:29,411
- Yes, I want to be with someone
who wants to really know me.
290
00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:32,109
- Oh, come on, you aren'’t
exactly an open book yourself.
291
00:10:32,109 --> 00:10:34,285
Getting you to "go deep
on an emotional level"
292
00:10:34,285 --> 00:10:37,071
is sort of like like snorkeling
when you really want to scuba.
293
00:10:37,071 --> 00:10:39,290
- Really?
I'’m that closed off?
294
00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:41,162
Was I closed off with you?
295
00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:42,946
- It'’s gonna take something
a little stronger
296
00:10:42,946 --> 00:10:45,906
than chocolate coconut swirl
for me to answer that.
297
00:10:45,906 --> 00:10:47,211
- Luckily, awesome Sully
left a bottle
298
00:10:47,211 --> 00:10:49,170
of peppermint schnapps
in my truck.
299
00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:50,562
- Shall we get drunk
and get real?
300
00:10:50,562 --> 00:10:51,912
- We shall.
301
00:10:58,092 --> 00:11:00,398
- Ugh, tastes like lighter fluid
and breath mints.
302
00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:02,444
- Yeah, I don'’t think you'’re
supposed to drink it straight.
303
00:11:02,444 --> 00:11:04,664
- I wouldn'’t want
to drink it gay either.
304
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,404
- Wow, that was bad.
305
00:11:06,404 --> 00:11:07,928
- So bad.
Horrendous.
306
00:11:07,928 --> 00:11:10,060
- See?
I'’m not closed off.
307
00:11:10,060 --> 00:11:12,672
I was very open to the fact that
that was an awful joke.
308
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,543
- I didn'’t say you'’re closed off
about everything.
309
00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:16,501
Just everything emotional.
310
00:11:16,501 --> 00:11:19,461
It'’s just standard dude stuff,I guess.
311
00:11:19,461 --> 00:11:21,855
I'’m sorry, I don'’t want you to
think I'’m being super critical.
312
00:11:21,855 --> 00:11:24,248
- No, I don'’t.
It'’s actually nice.
313
00:11:24,248 --> 00:11:26,294
With Sully, the deepest stuff
we ever talked about
314
00:11:26,294 --> 00:11:27,730
was during Truth or Dare.
315
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,732
And 90% of the time,
she chose dare anyway.
316
00:11:29,732 --> 00:11:31,342
- Okay, tell you what.
317
00:11:31,342 --> 00:11:32,909
This is the hood of trust.
318
00:11:32,909 --> 00:11:34,911
Everything we say here is safe.
319
00:11:34,911 --> 00:11:37,392
You can ask me anything,
and I have to answer truthfully.
320
00:11:37,392 --> 00:11:38,828
- Truth or truth?
321
00:11:38,828 --> 00:11:40,047
- Truth or truth.
322
00:11:40,047 --> 00:11:44,181
- Okay, same goes for you.
323
00:11:44,181 --> 00:11:45,705
And nothing leaves the hood.
324
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,315
- Okay.
325
00:11:47,315 --> 00:11:50,840
But can we really
ask each other anything?
326
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,799
- Anything.
327
00:11:52,799 --> 00:11:54,714
- Okay,
this is my first question,
328
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,629
and I really don'’t want it
to damage our relationship,
329
00:11:57,629 --> 00:11:59,457
but I just have to know.
330
00:11:59,457 --> 00:12:01,459
Why do you have a dream catcher
in your room?
331
00:12:01,459 --> 00:12:03,244
- I made that in Webelos,
jerk.
332
00:12:03,244 --> 00:12:05,115
- Hood of trust.
333
00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:07,161
- Okay, we'’re going there.
334
00:12:07,161 --> 00:12:09,337
What was up with the side braid
sophomore year?
335
00:12:09,337 --> 00:12:11,165
You never took it out.
336
00:12:11,165 --> 00:12:13,602
- One minor misstep in an
otherwise flawless hair record.
337
00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:15,256
Never to be revisited.
338
00:12:15,256 --> 00:12:17,606
Speaking of things
never to be revisited:
339
00:12:17,606 --> 00:12:20,043
Eva?
- Oh, so hot.
340
00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:22,306
Colin?
- So hot.
341
00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:24,091
What?
I was high that whole semester.
342
00:12:24,091 --> 00:12:25,657
What do you want from me?
343
00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:27,921
- Yeah, your taste in guys
has not always been stellar.
344
00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:30,010
Well, excluding me,
of course.
345
00:12:30,010 --> 00:12:31,663
- And Jake.
346
00:12:31,663 --> 00:12:34,623
- You dated Jake?
Oh, right, yeah.
347
00:12:34,623 --> 00:12:36,625
- Ooh!
I love it!
348
00:12:36,625 --> 00:12:39,454
"Atonercise with Lissa Miller."
How'’d you do that?
349
00:12:39,454 --> 00:12:40,847
- On my computer.
350
00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:42,674
It'’s just an editing program.
It was easy.
351
00:12:42,674 --> 00:12:45,199
- This looks amazing.
You are so smart.
352
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:46,591
- For a townie.
353
00:12:46,591 --> 00:12:48,593
- No, you'’re smart
for a person.
354
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:50,508
I mean that'’s,
like, professional.
355
00:12:50,508 --> 00:12:52,336
- Thanks.
I have a lot of ideas
356
00:12:52,336 --> 00:12:54,382
for the club and Derek
is always shooting '’em down.
357
00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:56,906
- Well, Derek needs
to get a life.
358
00:12:56,906 --> 00:12:58,560
- Yeah, well, maybe I do.
359
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:00,823
- What do you mean?
360
00:13:00,823 --> 00:13:03,826
- I think maybe I need to start
thinking about my future.
361
00:13:03,826 --> 00:13:06,220
I don'’t know if it'’s here.
362
00:13:06,220 --> 00:13:07,917
- Thank you for helping me
363
00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:09,963
with my final professional
bridesmaid'’s task,
364
00:13:09,963 --> 00:13:11,660
assuming that Kelly cools it
on the champagne.
365
00:13:11,660 --> 00:13:13,183
If she pukes,
she'’ll need hair-holding,
366
00:13:13,183 --> 00:13:15,098
and that falls under
my job description.
367
00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:17,535
- Just doing my duty
as best man.
368
00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:19,407
I also wanted to say
369
00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:21,496
I'’m so glad we ran into
each other today.
370
00:13:21,496 --> 00:13:23,324
- Yeah.
371
00:13:23,324 --> 00:13:25,848
Amy'’s really sweet
and really freaking pretty.
372
00:13:25,848 --> 00:13:27,545
I'’m so glad I got to meet her.
373
00:13:27,545 --> 00:13:31,071
- Thanks, but that'’s not why.
374
00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:32,637
I'’m glad we ran into each other
375
00:13:32,637 --> 00:13:37,251
because I always hoped
we'’d end up friends.
376
00:13:37,251 --> 00:13:40,210
You were way too important to me
to just fade away.
377
00:13:40,210 --> 00:13:42,734
- Yeah.
Me too.
378
00:13:42,734 --> 00:13:45,607
- Tamara, you knew I wanted
to get married.
379
00:13:45,607 --> 00:13:47,652
It'’s something I'’ve wanted
a long time.
380
00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:49,741
But you weren'’t ready,
and I get that.
381
00:13:49,741 --> 00:13:51,613
- I guess.
382
00:13:51,613 --> 00:13:53,441
- Okay, would you really want
to give up NYU right now
383
00:13:53,441 --> 00:13:55,312
to move to a base
in North Carolina?
384
00:13:55,312 --> 00:13:57,967
- I guess not.
385
00:13:57,967 --> 00:14:01,928
- So, friend, what'’s going on
in your love life?
386
00:14:01,928 --> 00:14:03,799
- Actually, I'’m dating someone.
- Yeah?
387
00:14:03,799 --> 00:14:05,888
- He'’s tall and sweet
and rich,
388
00:14:05,888 --> 00:14:08,456
and most importantly,
all about me.
389
00:14:08,456 --> 00:14:10,806
- Well, that'’s great.
- Yeah, I'’m doing good.
390
00:14:10,806 --> 00:14:12,590
The only hitch
in the giddyup
391
00:14:12,590 --> 00:14:16,290
is that I'’ve been heavily
lying to him
392
00:14:16,290 --> 00:14:20,076
about being rich myself when
I'’m actually $12,000 in debt,
393
00:14:20,076 --> 00:14:22,035
but, you know,
in the grand scheme of things,
394
00:14:22,035 --> 00:14:23,253
it'’s no biggie.
395
00:14:23,253 --> 00:14:25,038
Okay, it'’s a small biggie.
396
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:26,256
It'’s a biggie small.
397
00:14:26,256 --> 00:14:27,867
- Why do you always do that?
398
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:29,259
- I'’m a wordsmith at heart.
399
00:14:29,259 --> 00:14:30,521
Equipped to quip.
I can'’t help myself.
400
00:14:30,521 --> 00:14:32,393
- No, I mean lie to guys
about yourself.
401
00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:33,437
Do you not think
you'’re enough somehow?
402
00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:34,830
- What?
403
00:14:34,830 --> 00:14:36,440
- You lied to me
about wanting to get married.
404
00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:38,268
You told me how you catfished
your ex that time.
405
00:14:38,268 --> 00:14:40,096
Autumn San Francisco--
- San Diego.
406
00:14:40,096 --> 00:14:44,535
- The point is you need
to come clean to this guy.
407
00:14:44,535 --> 00:14:47,147
And if he doesn'’t like
the real you,
408
00:14:47,147 --> 00:14:49,976
maybe he isn'’t worth it.
409
00:14:52,979 --> 00:14:55,764
- ♪ All out like Janet
at the Super Bowl ♪
410
00:14:55,764 --> 00:14:57,635
- What'’s up,
sexual chocolate?
411
00:14:57,635 --> 00:15:00,638
I thought you stopped servingat 9:00.
412
00:15:00,638 --> 00:15:03,685
Did you start handing out
coupons at Urban Outfitters?
413
00:15:03,685 --> 00:15:07,080
- Sadita, meet my friends,
Rick and Richard.
414
00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:08,516
- '’Sup?
- Aloha.
415
00:15:08,516 --> 00:15:10,953
- No.
416
00:15:10,953 --> 00:15:13,260
Ditch these douches.
I want to hang out with you.
417
00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,739
Everyone else sucks.
418
00:15:14,739 --> 00:15:15,958
- I can'’t right now, okay?
419
00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:17,612
- You can'’t talk to me
420
00:15:17,612 --> 00:15:19,570
because you need to eat tamales
with these Ricks?
421
00:15:19,570 --> 00:15:21,877
- They'’re huge fans of my food
and we'’ve rescheduled a lot.
422
00:15:21,877 --> 00:15:24,184
Sorry, babe,
can I meet you later?
423
00:15:24,184 --> 00:15:25,707
- They'’re just tamales.
424
00:15:25,707 --> 00:15:28,144
It'’s street food!
Eat a hot dog!
425
00:15:28,144 --> 00:15:30,103
If you'’re so desperate
to eat this [bleep],
426
00:15:30,103 --> 00:15:31,974
go to his Mami'’s house.
427
00:15:31,974 --> 00:15:33,671
She'’s the one who does most
of the cooking anyway.
428
00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:35,673
- You know what, man,
we can just come back.
429
00:15:35,673 --> 00:15:37,893
- Yeah, September'’s wide open
as of right now.
430
00:15:37,893 --> 00:15:40,374
- No, no, no, no, don'’t go.
She'’s just in a mood.
431
00:15:40,374 --> 00:15:42,332
As usual.
- It'’s all good, brother.
432
00:15:42,332 --> 00:15:44,117
We'’ll catch you on the flip.
433
00:15:44,117 --> 00:15:46,858
[hip-hop music]
434
00:15:46,858 --> 00:15:48,599
♪
435
00:15:48,599 --> 00:15:50,297
- Don'’t look at me
like that, "brother."
436
00:15:50,297 --> 00:15:52,038
They'’ll catch you
on the flip.
437
00:15:52,038 --> 00:15:53,256
- What the [bleep] was that?
438
00:15:53,256 --> 00:15:55,258
Those guys were investors!
439
00:15:55,258 --> 00:15:56,912
They own a whole fleet
of grilled cheese trucks,
440
00:15:56,912 --> 00:15:59,523
and they wanted to talk to me
about expanding my business.
441
00:15:59,523 --> 00:16:02,570
Are you crazy?
- [bleep]! I didn'’t know.
442
00:16:02,570 --> 00:16:05,529
- No, I'’m the crazy one for
getting back together with you.
443
00:16:05,529 --> 00:16:07,401
Fool me once, shame on you.
444
00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:10,534
Fool me twice, I'’m out.
445
00:16:10,534 --> 00:16:12,710
- I didn'’t--
446
00:16:15,235 --> 00:16:18,238
- I think if we'’d have met
in college, we'’d be engaged now.
447
00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:21,632
- Who knows?
We'’ve tried so many times.
448
00:16:21,632 --> 00:16:23,852
But you'’re probably right.
449
00:16:23,852 --> 00:16:25,332
Maybe if we met
when we were older.
450
00:16:25,332 --> 00:16:27,421
- After you'’d sowed
your wild oats?
451
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:28,770
- Mine?
452
00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,467
Some of your oats
have been pretty wild too.
453
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:32,469
- Fair.
454
00:16:32,469 --> 00:16:36,212
You know, in some ways,
we grew up together.
455
00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:39,215
Well, sometimes together,
sometimes apart.
456
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:42,697
Either way, you'’re one of the
closest friends I'’ve ever had.
457
00:16:42,697 --> 00:16:43,872
Probably ever will have.
458
00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:45,482
- Thanks, Jenna.
459
00:16:45,482 --> 00:16:47,832
- You'’re welcome, Matthew.
460
00:16:47,832 --> 00:16:50,792
- You know...
461
00:16:50,792 --> 00:16:51,793
Never mind.
462
00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:53,055
- No, what?
463
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:54,578
- I don'’t know what it is
about you,
464
00:16:54,578 --> 00:16:56,798
but whenever something important
happens in my life,
465
00:16:56,798 --> 00:16:59,105
whether it'’s good or bad,
466
00:16:59,105 --> 00:17:03,065
you'’re the first person
I want to talk to about it.
467
00:17:03,065 --> 00:17:06,068
- Yeah, we'’ve known each other
for so long
468
00:17:06,068 --> 00:17:08,984
and been through so much,
469
00:17:08,984 --> 00:17:12,466
you'’re like a blankie that
smells like my mom'’s oak chest
470
00:17:12,466 --> 00:17:14,772
and still has bite marks
from when I was teething.
471
00:17:14,772 --> 00:17:16,861
- Gee, thanks.
I'’m a ratty old blanket?
472
00:17:16,861 --> 00:17:19,342
- You know what I mean.
You'’re like...
473
00:17:19,342 --> 00:17:23,738
I don'’t know,
home to me.
474
00:17:23,738 --> 00:17:25,870
- Well, one thing'’s for certain.
475
00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:27,568
Our timing'’s always been off.
476
00:17:27,568 --> 00:17:29,091
[vehicle approaching]
477
00:17:31,006 --> 00:17:32,442
- Always.
478
00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:41,669
[cell phone dialing tones]
479
00:17:41,669 --> 00:17:43,236
- Patrick.
480
00:17:43,236 --> 00:17:45,716
Hi, it'’s me.
481
00:17:45,716 --> 00:17:49,285
There'’s something
that I need to tell you.
482
00:17:52,810 --> 00:17:54,073
- How did he know
where to find me?
483
00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:56,031
- He texted me
looking for you.
484
00:17:56,031 --> 00:17:58,642
- Wait, I'’m sorry.
You guys text?
485
00:17:58,642 --> 00:18:00,862
- You weren'’t answering
my calls.
486
00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:02,559
- He said he really needed
to apologize.
487
00:18:02,559 --> 00:18:04,561
And I thought you'’d want
to hear it.
488
00:18:04,561 --> 00:18:06,128
- I'’m sorry I involved you, man.
489
00:18:06,128 --> 00:18:07,521
It'’s just,
whenever something happens,
490
00:18:07,521 --> 00:18:09,958
you'’re the one
she wants to talk to.
491
00:18:09,958 --> 00:18:11,742
Can I talk to you?
492
00:18:11,742 --> 00:18:15,094
♪
493
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,878
- ♪ I love
494
00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:20,055
♪
495
00:18:20,055 --> 00:18:21,709
- Jenna, look, I'’m sorry.
496
00:18:21,709 --> 00:18:25,191
I don'’t know what got into me
this morning.
497
00:18:25,191 --> 00:18:26,409
[sighs]
498
00:18:26,409 --> 00:18:28,368
Actually, no.
I do know.
499
00:18:28,368 --> 00:18:31,284
You were right
about me and Lizzy.
500
00:18:31,284 --> 00:18:33,112
- What?
- Nothing happened.
501
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:34,374
Nothing ever would happen.
502
00:18:34,374 --> 00:18:35,853
I have to admit
that I wanted Lizzy
503
00:18:35,853 --> 00:18:37,986
to think that
it was still a possibility.
504
00:18:37,986 --> 00:18:41,207
All the author events and
the readings she takes me to,
505
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:42,686
they'’re a huge opportunity.
506
00:18:42,686 --> 00:18:44,601
And I'’m not in a position
to turn that stuff down.
507
00:18:44,601 --> 00:18:46,821
I'’m sorry I couldn'’t
just admit it earlier,
508
00:18:46,821 --> 00:18:49,040
but I hadn'’t really admitted it
to myself.
509
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:51,086
That'’s why I was such a jerk
when you called me on it.
510
00:18:51,086 --> 00:18:53,480
- Okay.
511
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:55,873
- I was wrong.
512
00:18:55,873 --> 00:18:59,355
And I was weak.
513
00:18:59,355 --> 00:19:01,357
And I'’m really embarrassed.
514
00:19:01,357 --> 00:19:03,403
And sorry.
515
00:19:03,403 --> 00:19:05,274
Can you forgive me?
516
00:19:05,274 --> 00:19:07,885
- As far as apologies go,
that was a pretty good one.
517
00:19:07,885 --> 00:19:09,496
- I can do better.
518
00:19:09,496 --> 00:19:10,671
Do you remember
how you always wanted
519
00:19:10,671 --> 00:19:12,325
to get into SCU
more than anything?
520
00:19:12,325 --> 00:19:13,543
Dean Strauss
just emailed me.
521
00:19:13,543 --> 00:19:15,023
He loves your stuff,
522
00:19:15,023 --> 00:19:16,111
and he wants you to come in
for an interview.
523
00:19:16,111 --> 00:19:17,417
- Are you serious?
524
00:19:17,417 --> 00:19:19,027
- He thinks you have
a unique voice.
525
00:19:19,027 --> 00:19:21,072
I sent him a couple of your
best pieces a few weeks ago.
526
00:19:21,072 --> 00:19:22,726
I hope that'’s okay.
527
00:19:22,726 --> 00:19:23,814
I wanted it to be a surprise.
528
00:19:23,814 --> 00:19:25,903
- I'’m definitely surprised.
529
00:19:25,903 --> 00:19:27,688
- With your grades from Wyckoff
530
00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:29,080
and your track record
at Idea Bin,
531
00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:30,908
you have a real shot
at transferring.
532
00:19:30,908 --> 00:19:33,737
- This is amazing.
I can'’t believe you did that.
533
00:19:33,737 --> 00:19:36,087
Huh!
534
00:19:36,087 --> 00:19:37,959
He really said I have
a unique voice?
535
00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:39,613
He really said that?
- I have the email to prove it.
536
00:19:39,613 --> 00:19:42,006
Let'’s go home.
537
00:19:42,006 --> 00:19:44,052
I stocked the freezer
with Rocky Road.
538
00:19:44,052 --> 00:19:47,098
- You are
a really good apologizer.
539
00:19:47,098 --> 00:19:48,709
- ♪ Over here
540
00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:52,843
♪ Ah over here
541
00:19:52,843 --> 00:19:55,368
- One sec.
542
00:19:55,368 --> 00:20:03,027
♪
543
00:20:03,027 --> 00:20:07,206
Thank you for telling him
where to find me.
544
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:09,033
And thank you for tonight.
545
00:20:09,033 --> 00:20:11,035
- Hey, that'’s what friends
are for.
546
00:20:11,035 --> 00:20:12,559
- ♪ I'’ll wait, I'’ll wait,
I'’ll wait ♪
547
00:20:12,559 --> 00:20:14,996
♪ I'’ll wait right here ♪
548
00:20:14,996 --> 00:20:18,695
♪ I'’ll stand for years
and years and years ♪
549
00:20:18,695 --> 00:20:20,480
♪ I'’ll wait,
I'’ll wait ♪
550
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:22,960
♪ I'’ll wait,
I'’ll wait right here ♪
551
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:26,703
♪ I'’ll stand for years
and years and years ♪
552
00:20:26,703 --> 00:20:28,792
♪ I'’ll wait, I'’ll wait,
I'’ll wait, I'’ll wait ♪
553
00:20:28,792 --> 00:20:33,057
♪ Right ah over here
554
00:20:33,057 --> 00:20:37,192
♪ Ah over here
555
00:20:37,192 --> 00:20:40,456
♪
556
00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:46,549
- Next on "Awkward"...
557
00:20:46,549 --> 00:20:48,116
I'’m pretty sure
I want to go to SCU.
558
00:20:48,116 --> 00:20:49,683
- Wait?
Why?
559
00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:51,989
- I'’m not just cash poor.
I'’m everything poor.
560
00:20:51,989 --> 00:20:52,990
- I'’d like to offer youa raise.
561
00:20:52,990 --> 00:20:54,383
- I'’ll take it.
562
00:20:54,383 --> 00:20:56,342
- I'’ve been here 20 years.
563
00:20:56,342 --> 00:20:57,517
- Why is everyone mad at me?
564
00:20:57,517 --> 00:20:58,996
- Jenna is thinking
of transferring
565
00:20:58,996 --> 00:21:00,607
to SCU to be with Luke,
566
00:21:00,607 --> 00:21:02,173
so if you really
have feelings for her,
567
00:21:02,173 --> 00:21:04,088
you better express them
really freaking fast.
42887
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