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1
00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:10,611
- PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD...
- IT'S YOU.
2
00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:11,745
IT'S OVER, TAMARA.
3
00:00:11,745 --> 00:00:13,114
- JAKE, NO.
4
00:00:13,114 --> 00:00:14,248
- I'LL SEE YOU THEN.
5
00:00:14,248 --> 00:00:15,483
- THAT GIRL'S
A STRAIGHT-UP CREEPER.
6
00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:16,984
- I LEFT BECAUSE WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOU UP THERE
7
00:00:16,984 --> 00:00:18,386
WAS KIND OF ROUGH.
8
00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:26,927
- I COULDN'T FIGURE OUT
STANDARD DEVIATIONS
9
00:00:26,927 --> 00:00:28,462
FOR THE LIFE OF ME,
BUT THERE WAS ONE FORMULA
10
00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:29,830
I WAS FINALLY GETTING
THE HANG OF--
11
00:00:29,830 --> 00:00:31,865
THE FORMULA FOR MOVING ON.
12
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:34,034
ONE SPECTACULAR SENIOR YEAR
WITH MY FRIENDS
13
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,569
PLUS ONE AMAZING NEW BOYFRIEND
14
00:00:35,569 --> 00:00:39,273
MINUS ABSOLUTELY ZERO
LINGERING FEELINGS FOR MATTY
15
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:41,542
EQUALS ME READY TO START
A NEW CHAPTER IN MY LIFE.
16
00:00:43,077 --> 00:00:46,947
- OKAY, BABE,
BREAK TIME'S OVER.
17
00:00:46,947 --> 00:00:49,783
BACK TO THE RIVETING WORLD
OF STATISTICS.
18
00:00:49,783 --> 00:00:51,219
SO FOR EACH NUMBER
IN THE FORMULA,
19
00:00:51,219 --> 00:00:53,421
YOU SUBTRACT THE MEAN
AND DO WHAT?
20
00:00:53,421 --> 00:00:56,224
- I HAVE NO IDEA.
WANT TO MAKE OUT?
21
00:00:56,224 --> 00:00:57,158
- UH-HUH.
22
00:01:00,794 --> 00:01:02,963
- HEY, KIDS, DO YOU WANT
SOME DESSER--
23
00:01:02,963 --> 00:01:04,365
- JESUS!
24
00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:06,867
SOMEONE NEEDS
A TUTORIAL ON KNOCKING.
25
00:01:06,867 --> 00:01:07,935
- I AM SO SORRY, SWEETIE.
26
00:01:07,935 --> 00:01:09,137
I'M JUST GONNA BE
A BAD PARENT
27
00:01:09,137 --> 00:01:10,604
AND PRETEND I DIDN'T SEE
ANY OF THIS.
28
00:01:10,604 --> 00:01:12,440
JUST PROMISE ME
YOU'LL BE CAREFUL,
29
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:13,507
BECAUSE IF YOU'VE LEARNED
ONE THING
30
00:01:13,507 --> 00:01:14,542
FROM YOUR FATHER AND ME,
31
00:01:14,542 --> 00:01:16,043
IT'S THAT IT ONLY TAKES
ONE THRUST
32
00:01:16,043 --> 00:01:17,878
FOR SOMEONE TO BECOME
A TEEN MOM.
33
00:01:19,847 --> 00:01:22,015
- THAT IS SO EMBARRASSING.
34
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:23,184
- [clears throat]
35
00:01:23,184 --> 00:01:25,153
- NOW, WHERE WERE WE?
36
00:01:25,153 --> 00:01:26,387
- UH, IT'S GETTING PRETTY LATE.
37
00:01:26,387 --> 00:01:28,556
SHOULD WE JUST PICK THIS UP
NEXT TIME?
38
00:01:28,556 --> 00:01:29,723
- GOOD IDEA.
39
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:31,525
NO MORE DISTRACTIONS.
40
00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:34,061
- IT'S BEEN A PLEASURE
BEING YOUR MATH TUTOR.
41
00:01:34,061 --> 00:01:36,964
I ACCEPT PAYMENT IN THE FORM
OF VISA, MASTERCARD,
42
00:01:36,964 --> 00:01:39,800
OR, IN YOUR CASE,
A REALLY EXCELLENT KISS.
43
00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,570
- MY FORMULA FOR MOVING ON
SEEMED TO BE WORKING OUT GREAT.
44
00:01:42,570 --> 00:01:43,804
WHEN I KISSED LUKE,
45
00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:46,073
ALL I SAW WAS MY PRESENT
AND MY FUTURE...
46
00:01:46,073 --> 00:01:49,009
AND MATTY?
47
00:01:49,009 --> 00:01:51,845
ON SECOND THOUGHT, MAYBE
I NEEDED TO GET MY EYES CHECKED.
48
00:01:51,845 --> 00:01:55,583
[keys clacking, loud thud]
49
00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,685
- HEY.
50
00:01:57,685 --> 00:01:59,753
SORRY TO INTERRUPT.
- MATTY, RIGHT?
51
00:01:59,753 --> 00:02:01,189
GREAT TO MEET YOU.
I'M LUKE.
52
00:02:01,189 --> 00:02:02,956
- YEAH, I KNOW.
HEY.
53
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,592
- MATTY, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
54
00:02:04,592 --> 00:02:07,761
I THOUGHT YOU'D BE ON LOCKDOWN
AFTER THE MR. PHHS PAGEANT.
55
00:02:07,761 --> 00:02:08,962
- YEAH, I'M GROUNDED FOR LIFE,
56
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,264
BUT WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO,
57
00:02:10,264 --> 00:02:11,665
ADD ANOTHER DAY
FOR SNEAKING OUT?
58
00:02:11,665 --> 00:02:14,202
ANYWAY, I'M HERE ON BUSINESS.
59
00:02:14,202 --> 00:02:16,837
- OH, THE BF/GF/BFF CONCERT.
60
00:02:16,837 --> 00:02:19,840
- BF/GF/BFF IS THE NAME
OF A BAND?
61
00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,809
- NO, IT'S NOT.
IT'S A--
62
00:02:21,809 --> 00:02:22,843
NEVER MIND.
63
00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:24,978
I'M SORRY.
I FORGOT ABOUT THIS.
64
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:26,280
- SAME.
65
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:28,349
NO CLUE WHAT JAKE AND TAMARA
ARE DOING WITH THEIRS,
66
00:02:28,349 --> 00:02:30,684
BUT I FIGURED
YOU COULD HAVE MINE AND--
67
00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:33,086
I DON'T KNOW--
TAKE LUKE IF YOU WANT.
68
00:02:33,086 --> 00:02:36,690
- THANKS, MAN, BUT I HAVE
MIDTERMS THIS WEEKEND.
69
00:02:36,690 --> 00:02:39,126
WHY DON'T YOU GUYS
JUST GO TOGETHER?
70
00:02:39,126 --> 00:02:40,594
- SERIOUSLY?
YOU WOULDN'T MIND?
71
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:41,929
- NOT AT ALL.
72
00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:43,764
YOU SHOULDN'T MISS A SHOW
YOU ALREADY PAID FOR.
73
00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,566
- I AM DOWN IF YOU ARE.
74
00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:48,369
- SURE.
WHY NOT?
75
00:02:48,369 --> 00:02:51,439
IT WAS GREAT BEING WITH
A SECURE, MATURE COLLEGE GUY.
76
00:02:51,439 --> 00:02:53,241
ONLY SOME HIGH SCHOOL SPAZ
WOULD MAKE
77
00:02:53,241 --> 00:02:56,043
A BIG DEAL OUT OF A COUPLE
OF STUPID CONCERT TICKETS.
78
00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:59,247
- THESE CONCERT TICKETS
ARE A BIG FREAKIN' DEAL, ROSATI!
79
00:02:59,247 --> 00:03:00,848
YOU DON'T EVEN DESERVE
TO LOOK AT THEM!
80
00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:02,049
- OH, OKAY,
I CAN'T LOOK AT THEM.
81
00:03:02,049 --> 00:03:03,083
- NO, YOU CAN'T LOOK AT THEM.
82
00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:05,386
- UGH.
- THIS FOOTAGE IS FANTASTIC.
83
00:03:05,386 --> 00:03:06,520
- WHY ARE YOU GUYS FILMING THIS?
84
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:07,721
- WE'RE MAKING
A DOCUMENTARY CALLED
85
00:03:07,721 --> 00:03:09,257
STRAIGHT PEOPLE ARE BASIC.
86
00:03:09,257 --> 00:03:10,858
YOU'D BE SO GREAT IN IT!
87
00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:12,260
- OH, NO, NO.
88
00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:13,461
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.
89
00:03:13,461 --> 00:03:15,463
- WOULD ANYONE BE INTERESTED
90
00:03:15,463 --> 00:03:18,299
IN EITHER JAKE
OR TAMARA'S TICKET TO ECHOSMITH?
91
00:03:18,299 --> 00:03:20,000
THERE'S NO WAY
THEY'RE BOTH GOING.
92
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,770
- OH, PICK ME.
PICK ME, PLEASE.
93
00:03:22,770 --> 00:03:25,038
OH, PLEASE, HAMILTACKY.
94
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:27,275
EVEN IF AUSTIN AND I
DIDN'T ALREADY HAVE TICKETS,
95
00:03:27,275 --> 00:03:28,909
I'D NEVER BE DESPERADO ENOUGH
96
00:03:28,909 --> 00:03:31,279
TO TAKE YOUR FRIENDS'
SLOPPY SECONDS.
97
00:03:31,279 --> 00:03:33,947
- I BELIEVED YOU WHEN YOU SAID
YOU HAD THREE PET DINGOES
98
00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:35,716
AND A VACATION HOME
IN THE OUTBACK!
99
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,651
DO YOU KNOW HOW HUMILIATING
THAT IS?
100
00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:40,654
- OMG, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
- HEAR WHAT?
101
00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:43,457
- THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME
NOT GIVING A FLYING [bleep].
102
00:03:43,457 --> 00:03:44,625
all: OH.
103
00:03:44,625 --> 00:03:46,894
- THANK GOD WE WERE NEVER
THAT BAD.
104
00:03:46,894 --> 00:03:48,462
I'M SORRY YOU HAD
TO SEE LUKE AND I
105
00:03:48,462 --> 00:03:49,930
MID-MAKE-OUT LAST NIGHT.
106
00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:51,599
- WELL, JENNA, IT'S NOT LIKE
IT WAS THE FIRST TIME.
107
00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:54,402
- OUCH.
TOTALLY TRUE, BUT OUCH.
108
00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:56,704
- LUKE SEEMS LIKE
A GOOD GUY, THOUGH.
109
00:03:56,704 --> 00:03:58,906
I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU.
110
00:03:58,906 --> 00:04:00,808
[sighs]
111
00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:03,844
IT IS HARD TO FIND A PERSON
OF QUALITY AROUND HERE.
112
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:05,045
TRUST ME.
113
00:04:05,045 --> 00:04:06,680
- YOU KNOW, MAYBE
I'LL WRITE ANOTHER SONG
114
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:09,850
AND CALL IT MY CRAZY EX TALKS
LIKE A SPEED FREAK
115
00:04:09,850 --> 00:04:11,419
NO JK, LOL.
116
00:04:11,419 --> 00:04:15,122
- HOW ARE YOU GONNA DO THAT
WITHOUT YOUR PRECIOUS HARMONICA?
117
00:04:19,226 --> 00:04:20,328
all: OH!
118
00:04:20,328 --> 00:04:21,329
- AW.
119
00:04:22,730 --> 00:04:25,065
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG,
EXCEPT DATE A PSYCHOPATH
120
00:04:25,065 --> 00:04:26,800
WHO CAN DO A CONVINCING
AUSTRALIAN ACCENT.
121
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:29,937
- WHEN YOU SPEAK,
I WANT TO DIE, JUST FYI.
122
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,406
- STOP IT! STOP IT!
YOU'VE BOTH BEEN ACTING CRAZY.
123
00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:34,342
IT IS TIME THAT YOU LEARN
A THING OR TWO
124
00:04:34,342 --> 00:04:37,845
FROM YOUR FRIENDS/MODEL EXES
JENNA AND MATTY.
125
00:04:37,845 --> 00:04:39,680
THESE TWO HAVE MANAGED
126
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:41,449
TO MAINTAIN THE PEACE
EVEN AFTER JENNA
127
00:04:41,449 --> 00:04:43,216
CRUELLY CHEATED ON HIM
128
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:45,553
AND FELL DOWN
A RABBIT HOLE OF SIN.
129
00:04:45,553 --> 00:04:47,788
SMASH-CUT TO THE BRUTAL IRONY
OF THIS YEAR--
130
00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:49,957
JENNA IS NOW DATING
A HOT COLLEGE STUD,
131
00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:52,125
AND MATTY
IS STILL SINGLE AND ALONE.
132
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:53,527
- I'M--I'M FINE, ACTUALLY.
133
00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:54,528
- SHH.
DON'T SPEAK.
134
00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:55,796
WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY
135
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,998
IS THAT THESE TWO
HAVE A MILLION REASONS
136
00:04:57,998 --> 00:04:59,533
WHY THEY SHOULD BE
PUTTING UP THEIR DUKES
137
00:04:59,533 --> 00:05:01,469
IN THE QUAD,
BUT THEY ARE CHOOSING
138
00:05:01,469 --> 00:05:02,470
TO BE MATURE.
139
00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:03,971
- FINE.
YOU WANT MATURITY?
140
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:06,374
I'M GIVING UP MY TICKET.
HAVE FUN AT THE CONCERT.
141
00:05:06,374 --> 00:05:08,108
- YAY!
THAT MEANS I WIN.
142
00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:10,277
- WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, STOP!
143
00:05:10,277 --> 00:05:12,580
DO YOU GUYS, UH, KNOW ANYONE
144
00:05:12,580 --> 00:05:14,214
WHO MIGHT WANT JAKE'S TICKET?
145
00:05:14,214 --> 00:05:17,150
'CAUSE I THINK I KNOW A GIRL
WHO COULD REALLY USE
146
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,487
A NIGHT OF LOVE, LAUGHTER,
AND MUSIC.
147
00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:22,956
TALKING ABOUT ME.
148
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,458
- VAL WAS RIGHT.
149
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:26,594
IT WASN'T FAIR THAT I WAS IN
A SOLID RELATIONSHIP WITH LUKE
150
00:05:26,594 --> 00:05:28,128
WHILE MATTY
WAS GETTING HIT ON BY GIRLS
151
00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:29,997
WHO DIDN'T EVEN KNOW
HOW TO SPELL "MONOGAMY."
152
00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:31,632
HE DESERVED BETTER.
153
00:05:31,632 --> 00:05:32,966
- NOW THAT MY EX
HAS EXED HIMSELF
154
00:05:32,966 --> 00:05:34,802
OUT OF OUR PLANS,
WHO SHOULD WE INVITE?
155
00:05:34,802 --> 00:05:36,003
- I'M COOL WITH WHOEVER.
156
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,639
I'LL SEE YOU GUYS LATER.
157
00:05:38,639 --> 00:05:40,608
- THIS IS GONNA SOUND WEIRD,
158
00:05:40,608 --> 00:05:43,577
BUT I KIND OF WISH MATTY HAD
A GIRL TO BRING TO THE CONCERT.
159
00:05:43,577 --> 00:05:45,413
- HOLD THE IPHONE.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
160
00:05:45,413 --> 00:05:47,981
- SEEING MATTY MOVE ON
LIKE I HAVE WOULD MAKE ME HAPPY.
161
00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:49,249
- I CALL BLUFFNANIGANS, JENNA.
162
00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:51,419
NO ONE WANTS TO SEE THEIR EX
DATE OTHER PEOPLE.
163
00:05:51,419 --> 00:05:53,721
- I DO. I WANT MATTY TO DATE.
- REALLY?
164
00:05:53,721 --> 00:05:54,922
WELL, IF YOU'RE SO SURE,
165
00:05:54,922 --> 00:05:56,424
WHY DON'T YOU SET HIM UP
YOURSELF?
166
00:05:56,424 --> 00:05:58,526
- MAYBE I WILL.
GOT ANY SUGGESTIONS?
167
00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:03,063
- AS A MATTER OF FACT,
I DO.
168
00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:04,297
EVA.
169
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:06,133
SHE'S SO DOWN-TO-EARTH
AND NONTHREATENING.
170
00:06:06,133 --> 00:06:07,134
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
171
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,268
- SETTING UP MATTY
172
00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:09,737
WITH ONE OF THE HOTTEST GIRLS
IN SCHOOL
173
00:06:09,737 --> 00:06:11,304
WOULDN'T BE MY FIRST CHOICE...
174
00:06:11,304 --> 00:06:12,973
OR SECOND OR 90TH.
175
00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:14,575
- SEE?
I TOLD YOU, JENNA.
176
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:17,144
PUT A TBD
ON YOUR NBD ATTITUDE.
177
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,446
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU'RE WRONG.
178
00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:19,680
HEY, EVA.
179
00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:22,282
- MOTHER "F,"
I WASN'T SERIOUS.
180
00:06:22,282 --> 00:06:24,685
- HEY, GIRLS.
YOU BOTH LOOK SUPER CHIC TODAY.
181
00:06:24,685 --> 00:06:26,153
WHAT'S UP?
- I WAS WONDERING.
182
00:06:26,153 --> 00:06:28,622
HOW DO YOU FEEL
ABOUT LIVE MUSIC?
183
00:06:33,461 --> 00:06:35,796
- WOW!
WHAT A COOL CAR, TAMARA.
184
00:06:35,796 --> 00:06:38,532
JUST REMIND ME TO PUT
A PAPER BAG OVER MY HEAD
185
00:06:38,532 --> 00:06:40,233
WHEN WE ROLL UP
TO THE VENUE, OKAY?
186
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,503
- PRESS PAUSE
ON THE UNGRATE HATE, SADIE.
187
00:06:42,503 --> 00:06:44,472
WOULD YOU RATHER BE DRIVING
YOUR WIENERMOBILE
188
00:06:44,472 --> 00:06:46,373
TO THE CONCERT?
189
00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:48,676
- YOU'RE SHOWING VISIBLE SIGNS
OF DISCOMFORT.
190
00:06:48,676 --> 00:06:51,244
BACK MASSAGE COMMENCES NOW.
191
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,113
- NOW THAT I HAD ACCEPTED
TAMARA'S CHALLENGE
192
00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:54,648
AND GOTTEN MATTY AND EVA
TOGETHER,
193
00:06:54,648 --> 00:06:57,317
IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO DO
A LITTLE MASSAGING OF MY OWN.
194
00:06:57,317 --> 00:06:59,186
I LOVE YOUR DRESS, EVA.
- OH, THANKS.
195
00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:02,155
IT WAS A GIFT FROM
AN OLD FRIEND--ALEXANDER WANG.
196
00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:03,491
- UGH.
- TOO STRONG?
197
00:07:03,491 --> 00:07:05,125
- TOO DESPERATE.
198
00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:13,701
- YOU KNOW, YOU TWO
LOOK REALLY GOOD TOGETHER.
199
00:07:13,701 --> 00:07:15,503
- OH, YOU THINK?
200
00:07:15,503 --> 00:07:17,505
- EXCUSE ME. OH, SORRY.
201
00:07:17,505 --> 00:07:20,541
HEY, UH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
202
00:07:20,541 --> 00:07:22,075
- I JUST WANT YOU TO HAVE
A GOOD TIME TONIGHT--
203
00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:23,511
NO HIDDEN AGENDA.
204
00:07:23,511 --> 00:07:26,514
- OKAY, WELL,
YOU'RE BEING WEIRD, BUT OKAY.
205
00:07:26,514 --> 00:07:28,148
- PLAYING MATCHMAKER
WITH AN EX
206
00:07:28,148 --> 00:07:30,851
PROVES YOU'VE GONE
FROM POINT "A" TO POINT CRAY.
207
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:32,185
- I'M NOT CRAZY.
208
00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:34,254
MAYBE ONCE YOU FINALLY GET OVER
JAKE, YOU'LL UNDERSTAND.
209
00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:35,889
- PLEASE.
I'M SO OVER JAKE.
210
00:07:35,889 --> 00:07:37,658
- CAN WE GO?
211
00:07:37,658 --> 00:07:40,027
- * WE WALK LIKE
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG *
212
00:07:40,027 --> 00:07:48,536
*
213
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:50,303
- RUDE. GIVE IT BACK.
214
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:52,105
- CAN YOU NOT LOOK AT YOUR PHONE
WHILE DRIVING?
215
00:07:52,105 --> 00:07:53,440
YOU ARE WAY TOO OBSESSED
WITH JAKE.
216
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:54,542
IT'S NOT HEALTHY.
217
00:07:54,542 --> 00:07:56,710
- PLEASE TELL ME
SOMEONE HERE HAS ALCOHOL.
218
00:07:56,710 --> 00:07:58,879
IF I HAVE TO SHARE
THIS GROSS OXYGEN POOL
219
00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:00,981
WITH YOU LOSERS,
THE LEAST YOU COULD DO
220
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:02,916
IS GET ME DRUNK
SO I DON'T REMEMBER IT.
221
00:08:02,916 --> 00:08:04,284
- I LEFT MY FLASK AT HOME,
222
00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:06,086
BUT WE CAN GET DRINKS
WITH OUR FAKES AT THE SHOW.
223
00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:07,555
- NO ONE HERE HAS A FAKE.
224
00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:09,957
- [clears throat]
I DO.
225
00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:14,795
- MATTY, THIS WON'T EVEN GET YOU
INTO AN R-RATED MOVIE.
226
00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:16,764
IT'S OKAY; WE CAN STOP
BY THIS PLACE DOWNTOWN.
227
00:08:16,764 --> 00:08:18,065
THEY DO FAKES ON THE QUICK.
228
00:08:18,065 --> 00:08:20,568
I GOT MY FIRST I.D. THERE
WHEN I WAS, LIKE, 15.
229
00:08:20,568 --> 00:08:22,736
- YOU TOLD US YOU WERE
AT BOARDING SCHOOL
230
00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:25,305
IN SWITZERLAND
WHEN YOU WERE 15.
231
00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:28,141
- LE ROSEY, YES,
AND I WAS DATING A DJ IN L.A.
232
00:08:28,141 --> 00:08:30,143
THAT WOULD FLY ME OUT
ON THE WEEKENDS AND STUFF.
233
00:08:30,143 --> 00:08:32,212
- FROM SWITZERLAND?
234
00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:34,414
- A COUPLE OF XANNIES
ON THE PLANE,
235
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:36,116
AND THE DISTANCE FEELS
LIKE NOTHING.
236
00:08:36,116 --> 00:08:37,250
- THE SHOW'S GONNA START SOON.
237
00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:38,451
DO WE REALLY HAVE TO DO
ALL THIS WORK
238
00:08:38,451 --> 00:08:39,452
FOR JUST A COUPLE DRINKS?
239
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:40,688
- OH, COME ON, JENNA.
240
00:08:40,688 --> 00:08:42,656
WE ALL KNOW YOU ROLL
WITH THE OLDER CROWD NOW.
241
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:45,292
BUT US CHILDREN, WE STILL GOT
TO FEND FOR OURSELVES.
242
00:08:45,292 --> 00:08:46,493
- OKAY, WHATEVER, I'LL TAKE US.
243
00:08:46,493 --> 00:08:48,896
JUST PUT THE ADDRESS
IN MY GPS.
244
00:08:48,896 --> 00:08:54,602
- * WE WALK, WE WALK, WE WALK
LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG *
245
00:08:54,602 --> 00:08:57,304
* WE WALK LIKE
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG *
246
00:08:57,304 --> 00:08:58,906
[siren wailing]
247
00:08:58,906 --> 00:09:01,274
- EVA, YOU NEGLECTED
TO TELL US THIS PLACE
248
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,611
WAS ON THE CORNER
OF HEP C AND RAPE.
249
00:09:03,611 --> 00:09:04,912
- OH, IT'S FINE.
WE CAN PARK HERE.
250
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:06,246
SERIOUSLY, I'VE PARKED HERE
ALL THE TIME.
251
00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:07,514
IT'S NEVER BEEN A PROBLEM.
252
00:09:07,514 --> 00:09:09,149
- EVA, YOU'VE BEEN EVERYWHERE,
253
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:10,450
AND YOU KNOW EVERYTHING.
254
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:13,020
WOULD YOU PLEASE CONSIDER
BEING MY LIFE COACH?
255
00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:15,255
- SURE, I'M ALWAYS HAPPY
TO HELP THOSE IN NEED.
256
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,660
SADIE, CAN WE TALK FOR A SEC?
257
00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:21,494
- UGH.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
258
00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:24,164
- I HAVE THIS GREAT PHOTO
OF YOU FOR YOUR I.D.
259
00:09:26,734 --> 00:09:30,070
- NICE TRY, YOU SKETCHY SKITCH.
260
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:32,806
NOTHING HAPPENED THAT NIGHT,
AND YOU KNOW IT.
261
00:09:32,806 --> 00:09:33,974
- I KNOW.
262
00:09:33,974 --> 00:09:36,009
IT JUST KIND OF LOOKS
LIKE SOMETHING DID.
263
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,779
I WONDER WHAT AUSTIN
WOULD THINK.
264
00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:41,014
- YOU WOULDN'T DARE.
265
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:42,382
- PROBABLY NOT.
266
00:09:42,382 --> 00:09:43,817
BUT IF YOU'RE AT ALL WORRIED,
267
00:09:43,817 --> 00:09:46,419
YOU MIGHT WANT TO THINK ABOUT
BEING WAY LESS BITCHY TO ME.
268
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:49,422
[rock music]
269
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:56,496
*
270
00:09:56,496 --> 00:09:58,666
- YOU FOLKS LOST?
271
00:09:58,666 --> 00:10:01,301
PINKBERRY'S DOWN THE STREET.
272
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:04,204
- HEY, BABE.
HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?
273
00:10:04,204 --> 00:10:06,406
WE'RE HERE FOR I.D.s.
274
00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:09,643
- WHITE BREAD, PERMA-SCOWL,
YOU TWO,
275
00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:11,311
IN THE BACK, NOW!
276
00:10:11,311 --> 00:10:12,680
- YES, SIR.
277
00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:21,521
- JENNA, JUST SO I'M CLEAR
ABOUT WHAT'S GOING ON,
278
00:10:21,521 --> 00:10:24,758
DID YOU INVITE ME TO THE CONCERT
TO SET ME UP WITH MATTY?
279
00:10:24,758 --> 00:10:26,994
- NOT EXACTLY,
BUT IF YOU'RE INTO MATTY,
280
00:10:26,994 --> 00:10:29,029
I WANT YOU TO KNOW
I'D BE TOTALLY COOL WITH IT.
281
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,230
- SERIOUSLY?
282
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,465
- YEAH, IT'S CLEAR
YOU GUYS HAVE CHEMISTRY,
283
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:34,567
AND I DON'T WANT TO GET
IN THE WAY OF THAT.
284
00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:37,004
- I'M SO RELIEVED
YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THOSE GIRLS
285
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:38,438
THAT'S PSYCHO ABOUT HER EX.
286
00:10:38,438 --> 00:10:40,007
YOU'RE AWESOME.
287
00:10:40,007 --> 00:10:41,308
[camera shutter clicks]
288
00:10:43,510 --> 00:10:44,745
- WHAT DO YOU WANT
YOUR NAME TO BE?
289
00:10:44,745 --> 00:10:46,513
- AUSTIN WELCH.
- NO, AUSTIN.
290
00:10:46,513 --> 00:10:48,548
YOU HAVE TO CREATE A FAKE NAME.
291
00:10:48,548 --> 00:10:52,853
- BUT THAT WOULD BE LYING.
- DUH, THAT'S THE POINT.
292
00:10:52,853 --> 00:10:56,056
- AUSTIN S. WELCH.
293
00:10:56,056 --> 00:10:57,090
[camera shutter clicks]
294
00:10:57,090 --> 00:10:59,860
[tattoo needle buzzing]
295
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:01,729
- THAT LOOKS SO PAINFUL.
296
00:11:01,729 --> 00:11:03,296
- GETTING THEM REMOVED
HURTS MORE.
297
00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:04,998
- REALLY?
- YEAH.
298
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:06,533
WHEN I GOT RID
OF ALL MY TATTOOS LAST YEAR,
299
00:11:06,533 --> 00:11:08,401
I HAD TO DRINK STRAIGHT TEQUILA
TO GET THROUGH IT.
300
00:11:08,401 --> 00:11:09,737
- WHY'D YOU GET RID OF THEM?
301
00:11:09,737 --> 00:11:11,638
- THINGS CHANGE.
YOU NEED TO CLEANSE.
302
00:11:11,638 --> 00:11:15,075
- SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING
I NEED TO DO WITH MY TATTOO.
303
00:11:15,075 --> 00:11:16,309
- DOUBTFUL.
304
00:11:16,309 --> 00:11:18,011
I BET IT'S SEXY.
SHOW ME.
305
00:11:19,479 --> 00:11:20,613
- [sighs]
306
00:11:24,852 --> 00:11:26,253
- OH, THAT'S AN EASY FIX.
307
00:11:26,253 --> 00:11:28,621
"4 EVA," SEE?
308
00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:29,990
- WELL, THAT WAS QUICK.
309
00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:31,358
WITH JUST A TOUCH OF HER PALM,
310
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:33,794
EVA HAD FOUND A WAY
TO ERASE MY PAST WITH MATTY,
311
00:11:33,794 --> 00:11:35,195
NOT THAT IT BOTHERED ME.
312
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:38,431
MATTY'S AND MY HISTORY
WAS EXACTLY THAT--HISTORY.
313
00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:45,605
- YO, PROM KING AND QUEEN,
314
00:11:45,605 --> 00:11:46,774
FRONT AND CENTER.
315
00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:52,612
- HEY, DROP THE PHONE.
316
00:11:52,612 --> 00:11:54,281
- JAKE JUST TWEETED
THAT HE'S IN A HOT TUB
317
00:11:54,281 --> 00:11:55,783
MACKIN' ON SOME GROUPIES.
318
00:11:55,783 --> 00:11:57,284
WTF?
319
00:11:57,284 --> 00:12:00,120
I'M THE ONLY GIRL HE SHOULDN'T
BE GIVING ORGASMS TO.
320
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,990
[cell phone clicking]
321
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,369
STOP IT!
322
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:18,906
YOU'RE BEING A BUGABOO, JENNA.
I'M FINE.
323
00:12:18,906 --> 00:12:21,809
- DO YOU THINK MATTY'S UPSET
WITH ME FOR SETTING HIM UP?
324
00:12:21,809 --> 00:12:23,243
I MIGHT HAVE JUMPED THE GUN
ON THIS.
325
00:12:25,645 --> 00:12:28,115
- FURIOUS.
HE MIGHT NEVER GET OVER IT.
326
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:31,418
- YOU GUYS, GUESS WHAT NAMES
WE CHOSE FOR OUR I.D.s.
327
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:34,721
WILLIAM AND KATE,
BECAUSE, DUH, WE'RE ROYALTY.
328
00:12:34,721 --> 00:12:36,056
- WOW.
HOW ROMANTIC.
329
00:12:36,056 --> 00:12:37,891
WHOA!
WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?
330
00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:39,993
MY PLAN TO MAKE MATTY HAPPY
WAS WORKING.
331
00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:42,629
SO WHY WAS I SUDDENLY
FEELING SO UNHAPPY?
332
00:12:42,629 --> 00:12:44,898
IT'S NOT LIKE I STILL
HAD FEELINGS FOR HIM.
333
00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:48,368
HOLY [bleep],
I STILL HAD FEELINGS FOR HIM.
334
00:12:48,368 --> 00:12:49,402
- LET'S TEST THESE BABIES
335
00:12:49,402 --> 00:12:50,703
AT THE LIQUOR STORE
DOWN THE STREET.
336
00:12:50,703 --> 00:12:52,072
- WE'RE ALREADY LATE.
LET'S JUST GO.
337
00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:53,306
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
338
00:12:53,306 --> 00:12:54,574
I'D ACTUALLY LOVE TO GET
A BOTTLE OF THIS ROSE
339
00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:56,476
THAT LUKE TURNED ME ON TO.
340
00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:59,446
- EVA, WOULD YOU BE UP
FOR SOME CLASSY PBR?
341
00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:02,082
- IT'S MY FAVORITE.
- UGH. FINE. GO.
342
00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:03,216
BUT I'M STAYING HERE.
343
00:13:03,216 --> 00:13:04,684
I WOULD HAVE TO LATHER MYSELF
IN PURELL
344
00:13:04,684 --> 00:13:06,854
BEFORE STEPPING INTO
THAT ETCH-A-SKETCH PLACE.
345
00:13:09,056 --> 00:13:11,258
[cell phone clicking]
346
00:13:17,197 --> 00:13:18,966
- EXCUSE ME.
347
00:13:18,966 --> 00:13:20,500
DO YOU HAVE THE TIME?
- EW!
348
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:21,768
DO YOU NOT OWN A CELL PHONE?
349
00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:22,903
- I DO NOW.
350
00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:24,371
- [gasps]
OH, NO, YOU DON'T!
351
00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:25,939
THIS PHONE IS MY LIFELINE!
352
00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:28,575
MY TEXTS, MY MUSIC,
MY CONTACTS, MY PHOTOS,
353
00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:29,977
MY TWITTER, MY PINTEREST,
354
00:13:29,977 --> 00:13:32,712
AND MY COMPREHENSIVE NOTES
DEDICATING MY FIVE-YEAR PLAN!
355
00:13:32,712 --> 00:13:34,414
BACK OFF, BITCH!
356
00:13:34,414 --> 00:13:35,682
- HEY, LET YOUR PHONE GO!
357
00:13:35,682 --> 00:13:37,350
- THANKS.
358
00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:38,919
- I HAD IT
UNDER CONTROL, JENNA.
359
00:13:38,919 --> 00:13:40,888
- NO, YOU DIDN'T.
YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.
360
00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:43,723
- ACTUALLY, SHE HAS MULTIPLES.
361
00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:46,459
YOUR CAR IS BEING TOWED.
362
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:47,594
- STOP!
363
00:13:47,594 --> 00:13:49,096
MY FRIEND SAID IT WAS OKAY
TO PARK HERE!
364
00:13:49,096 --> 00:13:51,264
- I SAID IT'S USUALLY OKAY.
365
00:13:51,264 --> 00:13:52,799
- PLEASE CAN I HAVE
MY CAR BACK?
366
00:13:52,799 --> 00:13:54,801
- CONSIDER IT FOR $200.
367
00:13:54,801 --> 00:13:56,403
- GUYS,
PUT ALL YOUR MONEY IN, NOW.
368
00:14:02,275 --> 00:14:04,344
- THANKS.
- HEY! I THOUGHT YOU SAID--
369
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:06,479
- SAID I WOULD CONSIDER IT.
370
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:08,949
- WHAT?
371
00:14:08,949 --> 00:14:11,184
[engine turning over]
372
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:14,154
GUESS WE'LL NEVER FORGET
THIS FIRST DATE.
373
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:15,555
- THAT MADE THE THREE OF US.
374
00:14:18,825 --> 00:14:21,394
- JUST SO YOU KNOW,
I ONLY CAME BECAUSE OF MATTY.
375
00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:23,796
- SORRY TO PULL YOU
OUT OF YOUR GROUPIE ORGY.
376
00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:26,099
HOPE YOU DISINFECTED
BEFORE YOU CAME.
377
00:14:26,099 --> 00:14:27,935
OR SHOULD I SAY AFTER?
378
00:14:27,935 --> 00:14:29,369
- [clears throat]
379
00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:33,473
- OH, AM I CRUSHING YOU?
- NAH, YOU FEEL GREAT.
380
00:14:33,473 --> 00:14:35,508
- WOW, GLAD YOU TWO
ARE ENJOYING YOURSELVES
381
00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:38,011
AFTER OUR FRIEND GOT MUGGED
AND WE LOST ALL OUR MONEY.
382
00:14:38,011 --> 00:14:40,113
- IS THERE A PROBLEM, JENNA?
- I COULDN'T SAY.
383
00:14:40,113 --> 00:14:41,548
IN MY QUEST TO MOVE ON
FROM MATTY,
384
00:14:41,548 --> 00:14:43,216
I HAD ENDED UP
WHERE I STARTED--
385
00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:45,218
A JEALOUS, INSECURE WRECK.
386
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:47,454
NO. NO PROBLEM AT ALL.
387
00:14:47,454 --> 00:14:49,156
- LET'S GIVE EVA
A ROUND OF APPLAUSE
388
00:14:49,156 --> 00:14:52,825
FOR ALL HER GENIUS IDEAS
THAT GOT US INTO THIS HELLHOLE.
389
00:14:52,825 --> 00:14:53,961
- [clapping]
390
00:14:53,961 --> 00:14:55,028
[cell phone chimes]
391
00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,033
- OH, WHAT'S THAT?
- IT'S NOTHING.
392
00:15:00,033 --> 00:15:01,534
KEEP CLAPPING.
393
00:15:01,534 --> 00:15:03,636
- [clapping]
394
00:15:08,541 --> 00:15:10,610
- YOUR THREATS
DON'T SCARE ME, EVA.
395
00:15:10,610 --> 00:15:13,346
AUSTIN AND I DON'T HAVE
A TYPICAL RELATIONSHIP.
396
00:15:13,346 --> 00:15:16,249
IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED,
HE'S A LITTLE DIFFERENT.
397
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,288
I CAN BE HONEST WITH HIM
ABOUT ANYTHING,
398
00:15:21,288 --> 00:15:23,290
SO YOUR LITTLE PLAN
TO BLACKMAIL ME
399
00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:25,725
IS AS USELESS AS YOU ARE.
400
00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:30,230
- IT'S GOING TO COST YOU $400
TO GET IT OUT OF THE IMPOUND.
401
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:31,531
- JAKE, YOU PAY FOR IT.
402
00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:33,366
CONSIDER IT MY SETTLEMENT
IN THE JAKARA BREAKUP.
403
00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:34,634
- NO, I'M DONE.
404
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:36,369
I DON'T CARE ENOUGH
TO FIGHT YOU ANYMORE.
405
00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:39,172
- T, CAN WE SIDEBAR?
406
00:15:39,172 --> 00:15:40,640
YOU HAVE GOT TO STOP IT
WITH JAKE.
407
00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:43,010
YOU'RE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF.
- OH, PLEASE, JENNA.
408
00:15:43,010 --> 00:15:44,811
EVER SINCE MATTY AND EVA
STARTED HITTING IT OFF,
409
00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:46,846
YOU'VE BEEN GUZZLING DOWN
HATERADE.
410
00:15:46,846 --> 00:15:49,316
AT LEAST I'M OWNING MY CRAZY
INSTEAD OF LEASING IT.
411
00:15:50,417 --> 00:15:51,718
- [giggles]
412
00:15:57,724 --> 00:16:00,027
- SO DO WE MAKE OUT NOW?
413
00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:02,262
- NOT YET.
I NEED TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING.
414
00:16:04,664 --> 00:16:06,666
- OH, I HAVEN'T SEEN THIS PHOTO
OF YOU BEFORE.
415
00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:08,568
YOUR SKIN LOOKS BEAUTIFUL.
416
00:16:08,568 --> 00:16:10,537
OH, AND THERE'S MATTY.
417
00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:13,506
- IT WAS TAKEN ONE NIGHT AFTER
WE HAD FALLEN ASLEEP TOGETHER--
418
00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:16,043
TOTALLY INNOCENT,
NOTHING HAPPENED.
419
00:16:16,043 --> 00:16:18,111
- OKAY. GREAT.
420
00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:24,051
YOU LOOK LIKE
YOU'RE GONNA PUKE.
421
00:16:24,051 --> 00:16:25,352
- MATTY AND I KISSED,
OKAY?
422
00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:27,254
AND IT MEANT NOTHING,
AND I PROMISE
423
00:16:27,254 --> 00:16:29,522
IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
424
00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:33,526
[sighs]
I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER.
425
00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:35,562
- I'M REALLY GLAD YOU TOLD ME.
426
00:16:35,562 --> 00:16:37,064
- REALLY? I WAS NERVOUS.
427
00:16:37,064 --> 00:16:39,066
BUT I KNEW YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND.
428
00:16:39,066 --> 00:16:42,202
- OH, I UNDERSTAND.
429
00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:44,071
YOU'RE A LIAR,
AND I NEED TO BREAK UP WITH YOU.
430
00:16:44,071 --> 00:16:46,839
- WHAT?
AUSTIN, I DIDN'T LIE.
431
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:48,375
I'M TELLING YOU NOW.
432
00:16:48,375 --> 00:16:50,210
- YOU LIED WHEN YOU SAID
YOU WOULD BE MONOGAMOUS,
433
00:16:50,210 --> 00:16:52,445
AND YOU JUST LIED AGAIN
BY SAYING THAT YOU DIDN'T LIE.
434
00:16:52,445 --> 00:16:54,314
- AUSTIN, YOU'RE GETTING THIS
TOTALLY TWISTED.
435
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:55,815
- WHEN SOMEONE LIES
ABOUT FIDELITY
436
00:16:55,815 --> 00:16:57,250
IN A RELATIONSHIP,
THE PROBABILITY
437
00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,652
THAT THEY'LL LIE AGAIN
GOES UP BY MORE THAN 80%.
438
00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:01,188
- I'M NOT SOME STATISTIC.
439
00:17:01,188 --> 00:17:03,356
I'M YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
I JUST NEED TO--
440
00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:04,857
- I'M SORRY,
BUT THIS IS ABOUT WHAT I NEED,
441
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:07,427
AND THAT'S 100% CERTAINTY
THAT YOU WON'T BETRAY MY TRUST.
442
00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:08,528
- I CAN GIVE YOU THAT.
443
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,230
JUST GIVE ME A CHANCE
TO PROVE IT.
444
00:17:10,230 --> 00:17:12,332
- BUT THAT'S
THE PROBLEM, SADIE.
445
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:14,534
YOU'VE ALREADY PROVEN TO ME
THAT YOU CAN'T.
446
00:17:19,106 --> 00:17:21,641
- HALLELUJAH!
WE ARE FREE.
447
00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:23,210
THEY ARE FINALLY RELEASING
MY CAR FROM CAPTIVITY.
448
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:24,311
- HOW?
449
00:17:24,311 --> 00:17:27,347
- MY EXPERT
NEGOTIATION SKILLS, OBVI.
450
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:29,649
MY GRANDMOTHER LET ME CHARGE IT
TO HER CREDIT CARD.
451
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,818
- ARE YOU OKAY, SADIE?
452
00:17:31,818 --> 00:17:34,121
WHERE'S AUSTIN?
453
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:36,356
- MATTY, CAN I TALK TO YOU
BEFORE WE GO?
454
00:17:36,356 --> 00:17:39,292
- SURE.
455
00:17:39,292 --> 00:17:41,961
- I'M SORRY
IF I WAS RUDE TONIGHT.
456
00:17:41,961 --> 00:17:44,631
I THOUGHT I WOULD BE COOL WITH
SEEING YOU DATE OTHER PEOPLE,
457
00:17:44,631 --> 00:17:46,633
BUT IT BOTHERED ME
MORE THAN I THOUGHT.
458
00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:48,034
- I NOTICED.
459
00:17:48,034 --> 00:17:51,271
- I PROMISE NOT TO INTERFERE
WITH YOU OR EVA.
460
00:17:51,271 --> 00:17:53,406
YOU TWO HAVE MY BLESSING
TO BE TOGETHER.
461
00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:56,609
- YOUR BLESSING?
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
462
00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:59,146
DO YOU EVEN KNOW
HOW RIDICULOUS THAT SOUNDS?
463
00:17:59,146 --> 00:18:00,980
SHOULD I HAVE GIVEN YOU
MY BLESSING
464
00:18:00,980 --> 00:18:02,615
WHEN YOU CHEATED ON ME
WITH COLIN LAST YEAR
465
00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:05,318
OR MAYBE WHEN YOU STARTED
TO DATE LUKE?
466
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:07,854
WE DON'T NEED
EACH OTHER'S BLESSINGS, JENNA.
467
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:09,222
WE'RE NOT TOGETHER.
468
00:18:10,623 --> 00:18:12,825
HEY, LET'S GO.
469
00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:14,026
EVA, YOU GONNA COME WITH?
470
00:18:16,062 --> 00:18:18,165
- [mouths words]
471
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,235
- JENNA,
WE'RE GONE, BABY, GONE.
472
00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:23,736
COME ON.
473
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:28,375
- HEY!
GET OUT OF MY CAR, MAN!
474
00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:30,009
JESUS!
475
00:18:30,009 --> 00:18:31,043
YOU TOO!
476
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:41,454
- CLOSE CALL, BOYS.
477
00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:42,655
- BUMMER.
478
00:18:42,655 --> 00:18:44,257
WE DIDN'T EVEN GET
TO SEE ECHOSMITH PLAY.
479
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:46,326
- AT LEAST WE GOT
SOME FAKE I.D.s OUT OF IT.
480
00:18:46,326 --> 00:18:48,195
- OH, YOU GUYS GOT FAKES?
LET ME SEE.
481
00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:50,263
- I'LL SHOW YOU MINE
IF YOU SHOW ME YOURS.
482
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:54,434
"JOHN SMITH"?
483
00:18:54,434 --> 00:18:56,002
JAKE, THIS IS SO LAME.
484
00:18:56,002 --> 00:18:58,638
- OH, WHATEVER, WILLIAM, KATE.
- WHATEVER.
485
00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:00,707
IT'S CUTE. WE'RE CUTE.
- YEAH.
486
00:19:00,707 --> 00:19:02,375
- WHAT DO YOU SAY
WE CALL JAKE A CAR
487
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:03,976
AND THEN YOU AND I
CAN GET OUT OF HERE?
488
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:06,813
- I LOVE THAT IDEA.
- GREAT.
489
00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:07,980
JAKE, WE'RE CALLING YOU
AN UBER.
490
00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,216
YOU'RE TOO DRUNK TO DRIVE.
491
00:19:09,216 --> 00:19:13,686
- YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.
- YES, I DO.
492
00:19:13,686 --> 00:19:15,455
UGH, IT SMELLS LIKE TWEAKERS
IN HERE.
493
00:19:15,455 --> 00:19:16,789
ONE SEC.
- YEAH.
494
00:19:21,961 --> 00:19:24,564
- I THOUGHT EVA WAS TOO GOOD
FOR HIGH SCHOOL GUYS.
495
00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:27,400
- LOOKS LIKE SHE MADE
AN EXCEPTION THERE, JAKEY.
496
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:28,901
[siren wails]
497
00:19:28,901 --> 00:19:31,971
- [bleep],
HIDE THE BOOZE, MAN.
498
00:19:31,971 --> 00:19:36,075
[indistinct chatter
over police radio]
499
00:19:36,075 --> 00:19:37,644
- YOU TWO BEEN DRINKING TONIGHT?
500
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:40,247
- WELL, YES, SIR, WE HAVE,
BUT OUR FRIEND
501
00:19:40,247 --> 00:19:41,581
WENT TO GO CALL US A CAR, SO...
502
00:19:41,581 --> 00:19:43,115
- YEAH, WE DIDN'T START
DRINKING
503
00:19:43,115 --> 00:19:44,351
UNTIL WE GOT TO THE CONCERT,
504
00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:46,353
WHICH WE DIDN'T EVEN
END UP SEEING.
505
00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:48,087
- HEY, I'M NOT ASKING
FOR YOUR LIFE STORY HERE.
506
00:19:48,087 --> 00:19:49,456
- THAT'S GREAT,
507
00:19:49,456 --> 00:19:51,458
BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE
A LIFE STORY TO TELL YOU.
508
00:19:51,458 --> 00:19:52,392
- SHOW ME YOUR I.D.s.
509
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:01,968
YOU LITTLE CANDY-ASSES
GETTING A THRILL
510
00:20:01,968 --> 00:20:03,436
BY BEING IN THIS PART OF TOWN?
511
00:20:03,436 --> 00:20:04,971
- YEAH, YOU DON'T KNOW
ANYTHING ABOUT US,
512
00:20:04,971 --> 00:20:06,739
SO WHY ARE YOU BEING
SUCH A DICK?
513
00:20:06,739 --> 00:20:08,941
- SHUT UP, DUDE.
514
00:20:08,941 --> 00:20:11,311
- THAT'S IT.
OUT OF THE CAR RIGHT NOW.
515
00:20:11,311 --> 00:20:12,945
RIGHT NOW. COME ON.
- WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG.
516
00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:14,314
- THOSE OPEN CONTAINERS
JUST JUMP IN YOUR CAR
517
00:20:14,314 --> 00:20:15,315
WHEN YOU WEREN'T LOOKING?
518
00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:16,316
- HOW'D YOU GUESS, HUH?
519
00:20:16,316 --> 00:20:17,850
- GET!
- MATTY!
520
00:20:19,919 --> 00:20:21,454
[cell phone chimes]
521
00:20:27,126 --> 00:20:28,761
- SOMETIMES IT FELT LIKE
I WAS STUCK
522
00:20:28,761 --> 00:20:30,397
IN AN EMOTIONAL PRISON
523
00:20:30,397 --> 00:20:32,699
WAITING TO BE SET FREE
FROM MY FEELINGS FOR MATTY,
524
00:20:32,699 --> 00:20:36,102
AND NOW THAT I HAD LUKE,
THE HANDCUFFS WERE COMING OFF.
525
00:20:36,102 --> 00:20:37,604
- GETS EVEN BETTER.
526
00:20:37,604 --> 00:20:38,971
PRECINCT LOCKUP
IS ALL FULL.
527
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:41,541
YOU BOYS GET TO SPEND
THE NIGHT IN COUNTY.
528
00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:42,775
- [sighs]
529
00:20:45,478 --> 00:20:46,646
- NEXT ON AWKWARD...
530
00:20:46,646 --> 00:20:48,047
WE CAN STILL MAKE IT
TO SCU BY MIDNIGHT
531
00:20:48,047 --> 00:20:49,282
AND SPEND OUR NIGHT
WITH REAL MEN.
532
00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:50,617
- EVERY ONE OF THEM
IS LIKE A LIVING,
533
00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:52,519
BREATHING J. CREW CATALOG,
ONLY HOTTER.
534
00:20:52,519 --> 00:20:54,454
HEY THERE.
- [belches]
535
00:20:54,454 --> 00:20:56,623
- SURPRISE!
536
00:20:56,623 --> 00:20:58,024
- DON'T WE GET ONE PHONE CALL?
537
00:20:58,024 --> 00:20:59,626
- I'D RATHER DIE IN PRISON
THAN CALL JENNA RIGHT NOW.
538
00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:00,993
- GONNA GIVE YOU
HIS BROTHER'S NUMBER.
539
00:21:00,993 --> 00:21:02,795
HE'LL KNOW EXACTLY
HOW TO HANDLE THIS SITUATION.
540
00:21:02,795 --> 00:21:04,163
- I WENT TO JENNA.
SHE SAID SHE COULDN'T HELP.
39301
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