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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:05,306 - PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD... AAH! 2 00:00:05,306 --> 00:00:06,407 BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW, 3 00:00:06,407 --> 00:00:07,775 I DIDN'T TRY TO KILL MYSELF. 4 00:00:07,775 --> 00:00:09,443 "JENNA, AS YOU ARE NOW, 5 00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:12,713 YOU COULD DISAPPEAR, AND NO ONE WOULD NOTICE. A FRIEND." 6 00:00:12,713 --> 00:00:16,150 - GUYS LIKE MATTY DON'T GO FOR GIRLS LIKE US. 7 00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:20,321 [bell rings] 8 00:00:20,321 --> 00:00:22,856 - * I CAN'T DO ANYTHING WITHOUT YOU * 9 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:26,627 - FOR 2.8 WEEKS, MATTY COULDN'T KEEP HIS HANDS OFF ME. 10 00:00:26,627 --> 00:00:29,363 - * YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY BUT I LOVE YOU * 11 00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,964 - HE WAS ON A JENNA BENDER. 12 00:00:30,964 --> 00:00:33,834 AND ASIDE FROM THE FACT THAT MY VAG-A-MATIC WAS SUFFERING 13 00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:35,203 SOME SERIOUS ROAD BURN, 14 00:00:35,203 --> 00:00:36,670 I WAS HIGH ON LIFE. 15 00:00:36,670 --> 00:00:39,273 I WAS LIVING THOSE MAGICAL HIGH SCHOOL MOMENTS 16 00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:40,674 I'D ONLY SEEN IN MOVIES, 17 00:00:40,674 --> 00:00:44,912 AND LIKE MOST LEADING LADIES, I WANTED MORE. 18 00:00:44,912 --> 00:00:46,780 NOT MORE BONING. 19 00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:49,283 I WASN'T STARTING A LIFELONG BATTLE WITH SEX ADDICTION. 20 00:00:49,283 --> 00:00:53,154 I JUST WANTED MORE... INTIMACY. 21 00:00:53,154 --> 00:00:55,189 LIKE THE KIND I HAD WITH BRIAN PALERMO 22 00:00:55,189 --> 00:00:57,091 WHEN WE PLAYED DOCTOR AS KIDS. 23 00:00:57,091 --> 00:00:58,459 - AH, THERE'S A CRAMP. I GOT TO-- 24 00:00:58,459 --> 00:00:59,593 - SORRY. 25 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:01,362 SEVEN YEARS LATER, I WAS PLAYING FOR REAL 26 00:01:01,362 --> 00:01:03,431 WITH A GUY I KNEW NOTHING ABOUT. 27 00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:07,501 OH. CAN YOU MOVE? MY HEAD'S IN THE OVEN. 28 00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:09,170 - YEAH. - MY CASUAL SUICIDE REFERENCE 29 00:01:09,170 --> 00:01:10,671 COULD HAVE KILLED THE MOMENT, 30 00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,173 BUT LUCKILY MATTY WAS PREOCCUPIED. 31 00:01:12,173 --> 00:01:13,841 - OH, GOD. 32 00:01:13,841 --> 00:01:15,643 OH, UH, SHOULD I WAIT? 33 00:01:15,643 --> 00:01:17,545 - IT WAS TIME TO GET TO KNOW MATTY. 34 00:01:17,545 --> 00:01:18,646 - OH. 35 00:01:18,646 --> 00:01:20,248 - AND I HAD APPROXIMATELY TEN SECONDS. 36 00:01:20,248 --> 00:01:21,615 - IF YOU COULD LIVE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, 37 00:01:21,615 --> 00:01:23,351 WHERE WOULD IT BE? - UH, I DON'T KNOW. 38 00:01:23,351 --> 00:01:25,052 - HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY? 39 00:01:25,052 --> 00:01:26,320 - 'BOUT 15. 40 00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:27,621 - OKAY, SO IF YOU WERE ON DEATH ROW, 41 00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,390 WHAT WOULD YOU WANT AS YOUR LAST MEAL? 42 00:01:29,390 --> 00:01:30,624 - OH, BENIHANA'S. - ARE YOU CLOSE TO YOUR MOM? 43 00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:32,993 - OKAY, NO MORE QUESTIONS. - OKAY. 44 00:01:32,993 --> 00:01:36,630 - AWESOME! 45 00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:38,199 [sighs] 46 00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:41,535 WOW. 47 00:01:41,535 --> 00:01:42,636 OH, HEY. 48 00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:47,341 I USED TO COLLECT THESE LITTLE DUDES. 49 00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,510 - TURNS OUT WE HAD A LOT IN COMMON. 50 00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:50,311 KEEP IT. 51 00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:51,812 SO AFTER BONDING OVER SEX 52 00:01:51,812 --> 00:01:54,882 AND OUR SHARED LOVE OF REPTILES TRAINED IN MARTIAL ARTS 53 00:01:54,882 --> 00:01:56,317 SPECIALIZING IN SABOTAGE, 54 00:01:56,317 --> 00:01:58,652 I COULDN'T HELP BUT WONDER 55 00:01:58,652 --> 00:02:01,322 IF THIS MADE MATTY AND I A "WE," 56 00:02:01,322 --> 00:02:03,724 AND WERE WE GOING ABOUT THIS BACKWARDS? 57 00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:06,394 FIRST THE SEX, THEN THE RELATIONSHIP? 58 00:02:06,394 --> 00:02:09,062 OR WERE WE JUST MORE INTERESTING? 59 00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:10,398 DO WE HAVE ANY PLANS-- 60 00:02:10,398 --> 00:02:13,234 DO YOU. DO YOU HAVE ANY PLANS THIS WEEKEND? 61 00:02:13,234 --> 00:02:16,237 - I'LL, UH, PROBABLY SWING BY LISSA'S PARTY FRIDAY. 62 00:02:16,237 --> 00:02:17,438 - OH. 63 00:02:17,438 --> 00:02:19,340 I SHOULD HAVE GONE WITH THE "WE." 64 00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:21,074 YOU KNOW, POWER OF SUGGESTION. 65 00:02:21,074 --> 00:02:24,545 - YOU SHOULD COME. 66 00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:33,221 - OKAY, SO I GUESS "WE" WEREN'T THE TYPE WHO KISSED GOOD-BYE. 67 00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:40,060 OR MAYBE WE WERE. 68 00:02:40,060 --> 00:02:43,464 - * YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH * 69 00:02:43,464 --> 00:02:45,699 [typing on keyboard] 70 00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:47,235 [loud thud] 71 00:02:49,237 --> 00:02:50,938 - IF YOU'RE NOT BUSY TONIGHT, 72 00:02:50,938 --> 00:02:54,242 RICKY SCHWARTZ IS HAVING PEEPS OVER FOR STRIP JENGA. 73 00:02:54,242 --> 00:02:57,044 - UM, MATTY INVITED ME TO A PARTY. 74 00:02:57,044 --> 00:02:59,380 - GET OUT OF THE CITY! 75 00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,582 - MATTY'S ACTUAL WORDS, "YOU SHOULD COME." 76 00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:03,116 DOES THAT COUNT AS AN INVITE? 77 00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,253 - HE PARKED HIS PINK CADILLAC DOWN YOUR SIDE STREET. 78 00:03:05,253 --> 00:03:06,620 OF COURSE IT COUNTS. 79 00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:08,889 HE'S TAKING YOU PUBLIC, OUTING YOU AS A COUPLE. 80 00:03:08,889 --> 00:03:11,058 - TAMARA THOUGHT MATTY AND I WERE A "WE." 81 00:03:11,058 --> 00:03:12,460 SO IT'S A DATE? 82 00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:14,094 - DATES ARE SO OLD TESTAMENT. 83 00:03:14,094 --> 00:03:15,263 YOU JUST SHOW UP AT THE PARTY. 84 00:03:15,263 --> 00:03:16,530 AND BRING ME. 85 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,165 - WELL, TOO BAD IT'S BEING THROWN 86 00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:19,733 BY QUEEN OF THE VIRGIN PARADE. 87 00:03:19,733 --> 00:03:22,870 - JOIN THE ABSTINENCE CLUB. BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE. 88 00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:24,372 - TIA. 89 00:03:24,372 --> 00:03:26,607 IT MEANS THIS IS AWKWARD. 90 00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:31,779 - ABSTINENCE ISN'T EASY, AND NEITHER ARE YOU. 91 00:03:31,779 --> 00:03:33,281 - GUESS YOU CAN'T BE IN THAT CLUB. 92 00:03:33,281 --> 00:03:34,415 BUT YOU CAN STILL GO TO HER PARTY. 93 00:03:34,415 --> 00:03:35,949 - IT'S PENCILED IN. 94 00:03:35,949 --> 00:03:38,018 KEEPING MATTY AND I'S RELATIONSHIP OFF THE GRID 95 00:03:38,018 --> 00:03:39,453 SEEMS TO BE WORKING FOR US. 96 00:03:45,293 --> 00:03:46,294 - HEY, STOP. 97 00:03:46,294 --> 00:03:47,428 DON'T TOUCH ME THERE. 98 00:03:47,428 --> 00:03:50,364 THAT, SIR, IS MY NO-NO SQUARE. 99 00:03:50,364 --> 00:03:51,765 - GIRLFRIEND'S ON THE HYMEN SQUAD. 100 00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:54,201 - YEAH. LISSA'S GIVEN ME SO MANY RUB AND TUGS, 101 00:03:54,201 --> 00:03:55,903 I GOT NO SKIN LEFT DOWN THERE. 102 00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:57,305 - I BLAME GOD. 103 00:03:57,305 --> 00:03:58,672 - YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY SUCKS, MAN? 104 00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:00,474 IT'S OUR THREE-MONTH ANNIVERSARY TONIGHT, 105 00:04:00,474 --> 00:04:01,809 SO I'M PROBABLY DUE ANOTHER HANDIE. 106 00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:03,644 - OR LISSA'S CASE, A SANDIE. - HUH? 107 00:04:03,644 --> 00:04:06,314 - HANDIE SO ROUGH, IT'S LIKE SANDPAPER. 108 00:04:06,314 --> 00:04:07,581 - WE HAVE TO GO TO LISSA'S. 109 00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:09,550 THIS IS MY OPPORTUNITY TO SKIP NINE, 110 00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:11,585 MAYBE TEN RUNGS ON THE SOCIAL LADDER. 111 00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:12,986 - IT'S PROBABLY GONNA BE A BIG PARTY, 112 00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,622 AND NO ONE'LL EVEN NOTICE WE'RE THERE. 113 00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:16,056 - DOESN'T MATTER. 114 00:04:16,056 --> 00:04:17,791 A PERSON'S POPULARITY IS DIRECTLY RELATED 115 00:04:17,791 --> 00:04:19,760 TO THE NUMBER OF RED CUP PICS THEY HAVE POSTED ONLINE. 116 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,562 PHOTOSHOPPING MY WAY TO THE A-LIST 117 00:04:21,562 --> 00:04:23,631 WAS A BIG FAIL MARY. 118 00:04:23,631 --> 00:04:25,499 TO SIMULATE GANGE SMOKE, I LIT A FIRE IN MY TRASH CAN, 119 00:04:25,499 --> 00:04:27,034 AND MY HAIR CAUGHT ON FIRE. 120 00:04:27,034 --> 00:04:29,337 LUCKILY, I WAS WEARING MY JESSICA SIMPS BUMP-UP PONY, 121 00:04:29,337 --> 00:04:30,904 SO I JUST RIPPED THAT [bleep] OUT. 122 00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:32,340 - S-T-O-P. 123 00:04:32,340 --> 00:04:35,909 KEEP YOUR THING AWAY FROM ME. 124 00:04:35,909 --> 00:04:38,812 - WHERE'S YOUR PURITY RING? HANGING FROM YOUR NIPPLE? 125 00:04:38,812 --> 00:04:40,848 - I'M JUST USING THE GIFTS GOD GAVE ME. 126 00:04:40,848 --> 00:04:43,517 - I HOPE YOU'RE USING THE PARTY PLANNING GIFTS HE GAVE YOU, 127 00:04:43,517 --> 00:04:45,252 BECAUSE I WILL NOT BE ASSOCIATED 128 00:04:45,252 --> 00:04:47,355 WITH SOME LAME-ASS SHINDY. 129 00:04:47,355 --> 00:04:49,357 ESPECIALLY WHEN TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT 130 00:04:49,357 --> 00:04:53,461 I'M HOOKING UP WITH MATTY. 131 00:04:53,461 --> 00:04:55,629 - MY PARTY IS GOING TO ROCK YOUR FACE OFF. 132 00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,598 AND IT'S PERFECT TIMING. 133 00:04:57,598 --> 00:04:59,767 IT'S MINE AND JAKE'S THREE-MONTH ANNIVERSARY. 134 00:04:59,767 --> 00:05:01,735 - YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, RIGHT? 135 00:05:01,735 --> 00:05:04,705 - IT'S OUR PAPER ANNIVERSARY? 136 00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:07,007 - MORE LIKE A LATEX ANNIVERSARY. 137 00:05:07,007 --> 00:05:10,478 'CAUSE IT'S THE DEADLINE FOR SEX. 138 00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:12,946 IF YOU DON'T DO HIM, YOU'LL LOSE HIM. 139 00:05:12,946 --> 00:05:14,982 OH, AND DO NOT HEAT UP THE HOT TUB. 140 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:17,084 I CAN'T HAVE IT GOING DOWN WITH MATTY 141 00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:19,587 IN SOME NASTY CESSPOOL. 142 00:05:19,587 --> 00:05:23,624 - KEEP YOUR OPTIONS OPEN. 143 00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:25,959 - MAYBE WE SHOULD GO TONIGHT. 144 00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:28,962 I WAS HAVING SOME SERIOUS PARTY JITTERS. 145 00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:32,733 MY OUTFIT SAID YES, BUT MY GUT SAID STAY THE HELL HOME. 146 00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:35,869 MAYBE IT WAS A SIGN THAT MATTY NEEDED ROOM TO MISS ME. 147 00:05:35,869 --> 00:05:38,806 I JUST DECIDED WE'RE NOT GOING. 148 00:05:38,806 --> 00:05:40,508 - IF WE DON'T GO, THEN THE TERRORISTS WIN. 149 00:05:40,508 --> 00:05:42,142 AND BY "TERRORISTS" I MEAN SADIE. 150 00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:44,311 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU NEVER SHOWED THIS TO ME. 151 00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:46,279 BITCH DEFINITELY WROTE THE LETTER. 152 00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:47,748 - WHY WOULD SHE BOTHER? 153 00:05:47,748 --> 00:05:49,216 - ONE, SHE HATES YOU, 154 00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:51,919 TWO, SHE SEXTED YOUR BILLABONGS TO THE TRI-SCHOOL AREA, 155 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:53,621 AND, THREE, SHE HAS A THING FOR MATTY, 156 00:05:53,621 --> 00:05:55,255 AND PROBABLY SUSPECTS YOU DO TOO. 157 00:05:55,255 --> 00:05:56,824 YOU CANNOT SHOW FEAR. 158 00:05:56,824 --> 00:05:58,325 YOU HAVE TO SHOW HER YOU DON'T GIVE A CRAP. 159 00:05:58,325 --> 00:06:00,260 - OR I DON'T GO, AND I DON'T SHOW ANYTHING. 160 00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:02,430 - LAUNDRY. 161 00:06:02,430 --> 00:06:06,266 UM, ARE YOU WEARING EYELINER? 162 00:06:06,266 --> 00:06:07,601 WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE? 163 00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,236 - SHE GOT INVITED TO AN IN-CROWD PARTY, 164 00:06:09,236 --> 00:06:10,871 BUT SHE DOESN'T WANT TO GO. 165 00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:14,642 - OH, YOU'RE GOING, AND I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU CAN WEAR. 166 00:06:14,642 --> 00:06:17,010 NOTHING IN YOUR CLOSET. BE RIGHT BACK. 167 00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:19,680 - WHAT IF YOU INVITED MATTY TO A PARTY AND HE DIDN'T SHOW UP? 168 00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:20,814 HOW WOULD YOU FEEL? 169 00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:22,315 - WELL, I'D BE BUMMED. 170 00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:24,918 - GUYS HAVE FEELINGS TOO. THEY'RE SENSITIVE. 171 00:06:24,918 --> 00:06:26,620 ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE CIRCUMCISED. 172 00:06:26,620 --> 00:06:27,988 MATTY JUNIOR WEAR A HELMET? 173 00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:31,324 - HOW WOULD I KNOW? - OH, YOU'D KNOW. 174 00:06:31,324 --> 00:06:32,860 both: NO. 175 00:06:32,860 --> 00:06:34,895 - OKAY, WELL, I DON'T WANT MATTY TO FEEL BAD, 176 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,064 SO, I DON'T KNOW, SHOULD I ASK HIM TO WALK ME IN, 177 00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:38,632 OR DOES THAT MAKE ME SEEM LIKE A PUSSY? 178 00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:40,468 - NO, YOU AND MATTY HAVE A THING. 179 00:06:40,468 --> 00:06:42,135 - I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF THING, 180 00:06:42,135 --> 00:06:45,305 BUT I WAS HOPING THE PARTY WOULD CLEAR THAT UP. 181 00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:46,907 both: NO. 182 00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,942 - OKAY. 183 00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:51,912 - BIG UPS ON THE CONTENT, BUT I'M NOT SOLD ON THE SIGN OFF. 184 00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,782 - YEAH. I TRIED AN EXCLAIM, BUT IT MADE ME SEEM TOO EXCITED, 185 00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:56,484 AND NOW I'M WORRIED THE DOT DOT DOT IS TOO WHOREY. 186 00:06:56,484 --> 00:06:59,520 - AGREED. THE ELLIPSES ARE THE SLUTS OF PUNCTUATION. 187 00:06:59,520 --> 00:07:01,822 GO WITH A DASH. 188 00:07:01,822 --> 00:07:04,157 both: NO. 189 00:07:04,157 --> 00:07:07,961 - I DON'T REALLY REMEMBER A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT 190 00:07:07,961 --> 00:07:09,129 FROM THAT NIGHT. 191 00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:11,532 KEEP IN MIND, IT WAS MY VERY FIRST PARTY, 192 00:07:11,532 --> 00:07:14,535 AND I WAS WASTED. 193 00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:17,805 AND I WAS ALONE WITH MAYBE SEVEN GUYS, 194 00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:19,540 AND THEY WERE WASTED... 195 00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:22,610 - OKAY. IF YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET NOSTALGIC OVER YOUR FIRST ORGY, 196 00:07:22,610 --> 00:07:24,812 I REALLY DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT. 197 00:07:24,812 --> 00:07:27,781 - SURPRISINGLY, NO. 198 00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:30,584 BUT I NEVER DID FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED TO MY PANTIES. 199 00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:32,853 - OKAY, UM... 200 00:07:32,853 --> 00:07:34,522 HE HASN'T TEXTED ME BACK. 201 00:07:34,522 --> 00:07:36,957 HOW DO I KNOW IF HE'S INSIDE? OR SHOULD I WAIT OUT HERE? 202 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,759 - WHO ARE WE TALKING ABOUT? - MATTY McKIBBEN. 203 00:07:38,759 --> 00:07:41,529 - [gasps] ARE YOU AND MATTY TOGETHER? 204 00:07:41,529 --> 00:07:44,598 - APPARENTLY THIS WAS A BURNING QUESTION ON EVERYONE'S MIND. 205 00:07:44,598 --> 00:07:46,534 IF ONLY I COULD ANSWER IT. 206 00:07:46,534 --> 00:07:48,736 CAN WE GO AROUND THE BLOCK AGAIN? 207 00:07:48,736 --> 00:07:52,239 - NO MORE LAPS. MM-MM. 208 00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:53,974 THE BEER IS FOR THE KIDS. 209 00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:55,843 FINNISH VODKA IS FOR LISSA'S MOM. 210 00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:57,344 SHE IS A BIG BOOZER, 211 00:07:57,344 --> 00:08:00,814 AND NO DOUBT DRANK EVERY OUNCE OF HOOCH IN THAT HOUSE. 212 00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:03,283 ALL RIGHT, GIRLS. WHAT IS THE GOLDEN RULE? 213 00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:05,653 both: BEER BEFORE LIQUOR, NEVER SICKER. 214 00:08:05,653 --> 00:08:07,888 LIQUOR BEFORE BEER, IN THE CLEAR. 215 00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:10,558 - YAY! HAVE A GOOD NIGHT. 216 00:08:10,558 --> 00:08:13,594 MWAH. 217 00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:14,795 - PROMISE ME IF IT'S WEIRD AT ALL 218 00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:16,163 THAT WE WILL JUST LEAVE, OKAY? 219 00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:17,831 - LIKE YOU SAID, NO ONE'LL EVEN NOTICE US. 220 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,232 IT SOUNDS LIKE A RAGER. 221 00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:21,301 THERE'S PROBABLY FIVE MILLION PEOPLE IN HERE. 222 00:08:21,301 --> 00:08:25,372 - THAT'S TRUE, I GUESS. 223 00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:28,576 HI. 224 00:08:28,576 --> 00:08:30,210 - OR WE JUST CRASHED A GET-TOGETHER. 225 00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:32,112 - TIA. 226 00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:41,755 - UH, THE FINNISH VODKA'S FOR YOUR MOM, 227 00:08:41,755 --> 00:08:45,593 AND THE BEER IS... THAT'S FOR US. 228 00:08:45,593 --> 00:08:47,695 - OH, MY MOM'LL BE SO STOKED. 229 00:08:47,695 --> 00:08:50,598 HER BATHROOM MINI FRIDGE IS TOTALLY EMPTY. 230 00:08:50,598 --> 00:08:53,033 - WHO...THE [bleep]... 231 00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:56,770 INVITED...YOU? 232 00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:58,839 - I DID. 233 00:08:58,839 --> 00:09:01,642 - MATTY AND I WERE A "WE." 234 00:09:04,612 --> 00:09:06,714 - BETTER HIDE THE KNIVES. 235 00:09:06,714 --> 00:09:08,415 - SAY "SADIE!" 236 00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:10,718 - GET OUT OF MY FACE, WANNABE. 237 00:09:10,718 --> 00:09:12,152 [dog barking] 238 00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:15,623 LISSA, I TOLD YOU TO LOCK UP THAT STUPID MUTT! 239 00:09:15,623 --> 00:09:17,725 - SPRINKLES, BE QUIET! 240 00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:20,260 - SO THERE WE WERE, OUT IN PUBLIC, 241 00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:23,964 FOR THE WHOLE... SMALL GROUP OF PEOPLE TO SEE. 242 00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:25,933 I WONDERED HOW HE'D INTRODUCE ME. 243 00:09:25,933 --> 00:09:27,167 - HEY. 244 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:30,638 - AS HIS GIRLFRIEND, HIS DATE, HIS LOVER... 245 00:09:30,638 --> 00:09:32,673 - DRINKS AND STUFF ARE OVER HERE. 246 00:09:32,673 --> 00:09:34,274 - I WOULD HAVE SETTLED FOR "JENNA." 247 00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:36,777 - WELL, YOU KNOW EVERYBODY. 248 00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:42,282 - YO, MATTY. 249 00:09:42,282 --> 00:09:44,852 - I KNOW ALMOST NO ONE. 250 00:09:44,852 --> 00:09:46,754 WHAT DO WE DO NOW? - BLEND IN. 251 00:09:46,754 --> 00:09:48,188 - THERE'S NOTHING TO BLEND INTO. 252 00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:49,790 - MATTY INVITED YOU HERE. 253 00:09:49,790 --> 00:09:51,792 IT'S YOUR TURN TO MAKE THE NEXT MOVE. 254 00:09:51,792 --> 00:09:55,963 BUT FIRST, PRETEND LIKE YOU'RE CROSS-FADED. 255 00:09:58,131 --> 00:10:00,668 CIGARETTE BUTTS. 256 00:10:07,875 --> 00:10:11,078 - HOW'S IT GOING? - GOOD. 257 00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:13,046 YEAH, GOOD. 258 00:10:13,046 --> 00:10:16,216 PRETTY GOOD. 259 00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:17,951 OKAY, ACTUALLY, IT'S KIND OF WEIRD. 260 00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,053 - OH, IT'S WAY WEIRD. - YES. 261 00:10:20,053 --> 00:10:21,421 LISTEN, I REALLY DIDN'T KNOW 262 00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:22,622 THIS WAS GONNA BE A KICKBACK. 263 00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,124 - I FIGURED. - YEAH. 264 00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:27,160 - OH, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING. 265 00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,096 WHAT'S THE BENEFIT TO HAVING A SMALLER PARTY 266 00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:31,699 VERSUS A, UM, STANDARD RAGER? 267 00:10:31,699 --> 00:10:33,834 - WELL, NO ONE'S GONNA CALL THE COPS, 268 00:10:33,834 --> 00:10:36,069 AND THEIR HOUSE WON'T GET TRASHED. 269 00:10:36,069 --> 00:10:40,073 AND THERE'S A LOT MORE BOOZE TO GO AROUND, SO... 270 00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:43,677 - IT'S REALLY NICE TO SEE YOU OUT, JENNA. 271 00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:46,814 IS THIS YOUR FIRST PARTY SINCE THE ACCIDENT? 272 00:10:46,814 --> 00:10:49,182 - EVERYBODY SMIZE. 273 00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:51,885 SMILE WITH YOUR EYES. 274 00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:53,286 - IF OUR BODY LANGUAGE 275 00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:55,756 WAS ANALYZED BY THE EXPERTS AT US WEEKLY, 276 00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:58,058 THEY WOULD HAVE SAID WE WERE ON THE OUTS. 277 00:10:58,058 --> 00:11:00,227 - MATTY, I NEED YOUR HELP WITH THE KEG. 278 00:11:00,227 --> 00:11:02,229 - RIGHT. UH, TALK LATER? 279 00:11:02,229 --> 00:11:05,999 - MM-HMM. 280 00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:07,367 - HEY, DID YOU GET LOWLIGHTS? 281 00:11:07,367 --> 00:11:08,769 - AND HIGHLIGHTS. 282 00:11:08,769 --> 00:11:11,571 THEN I GOT COMPLETELY NECK-2-T LASERED. 283 00:11:11,571 --> 00:11:12,572 - DID IT HURT? 284 00:11:12,572 --> 00:11:14,141 - I DIDN'T EVEN FEEL IT. 285 00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:15,575 THEN AGAIN, I ALWAYS TAKE, LIKE, 286 00:11:15,575 --> 00:11:16,844 THREE ZANNIES. 287 00:11:16,844 --> 00:11:18,511 - OH, MY GOD. IS THAT SAFE? 288 00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,380 - THEY'RE DRIVING ZANNIES. 289 00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:23,516 - CUPS UP, LADIES. 290 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,185 BY THE WAY, I'M TAMARA. 291 00:11:25,185 --> 00:11:28,621 IT'S SPELLED "TAM-ARA," BUT IT'S PRONOUNCED "TA-MARA." 292 00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:30,657 LIKE, IF YOUR BIRTH CONTROL FAILS, 293 00:11:30,657 --> 00:11:33,794 YOU BETTER PLAN "B" IT "TA-MARA." 294 00:11:38,832 --> 00:11:42,569 - WOW. I'VE NEVER ACTUALLY SEEN A GIRL EAT 295 00:11:42,569 --> 00:11:44,304 AT ONE OF THESE KICKBACKS. 296 00:11:44,304 --> 00:11:46,373 - YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE HAVING ABOUT AS MUCH FUN AS I AM. 297 00:11:46,373 --> 00:11:48,208 - I'M A LITTLE STRESSED. IT'S MY ANNIVERSARY. 298 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:50,543 - WELL, IT MAKES SENSE. A YEAR'S A LONG TIME. 299 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:53,213 - IT'S ONLY BEEN THREE MONTHS. 300 00:12:00,187 --> 00:12:01,789 - WHA-- 301 00:12:06,994 --> 00:12:09,830 LISS. PEOPLE ARE WATCHING. 302 00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:12,132 - WHAT PEOPLE? - OKAY. 303 00:12:14,835 --> 00:12:16,603 - WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? 304 00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:18,271 - I HAD TO TAKE A LEAK. 305 00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:19,807 - OH. WELL, COME CHECK THIS OUT. 306 00:12:19,807 --> 00:12:22,209 LISSA'S DAD GOT AN ELECTRIC EEL, 307 00:12:22,209 --> 00:12:24,111 AND WHEN YOU TAP THE GLASS, IT GETS SUPER PISSED, 308 00:12:24,111 --> 00:12:26,213 AND SHOCKS THE CRAP OUT OF THE ANGEL FISH. 309 00:12:26,213 --> 00:12:29,182 - SADIE, LET'S JUST TALK ABOUT IT A LITTLE LATER, OKAY? 310 00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:31,819 ALL RIGHT. 311 00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:37,457 - DON'T EVEN TALK TO ME 312 00:12:37,457 --> 00:12:42,029 UNTIL YOU KICK THAT SLUT-HOLE OUT OF YOUR PARTY. 313 00:12:42,029 --> 00:12:43,063 - WHY? 314 00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:45,198 [gasps] DID MATTY JUST BLOW YOU OFF? 315 00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:46,699 - NO, I ASKED HIM TO GET ME A BEER. 316 00:12:46,699 --> 00:12:48,535 WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM, DRUNK FU? 317 00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:50,470 - YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT JAKE. 318 00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:54,107 HE IS PULLING AWAY. I HAVE TO STEP IT UP. 319 00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:55,943 BUT I CAN'T HAVE SEX-SEX, 320 00:12:55,943 --> 00:12:59,947 SO WHAT CAN I DO WITHOUT BREAKING MY VOW? 321 00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:02,649 - WELL, THERE IS A LOOPHOLE. 322 00:13:02,649 --> 00:13:04,751 - REALLY? 323 00:13:04,751 --> 00:13:08,621 - GOD HAS A BLIND SPOT. 324 00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:13,193 - HI. - HI. 325 00:13:13,193 --> 00:13:16,563 - SO I WAS THINKING, YOU REMEMBER THE OTHER DAY 326 00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:18,866 WHEN WE WERE AT YOUR HOUSE, AND WE WERE TALKING-- 327 00:13:18,866 --> 00:13:21,334 WHAT'S GOING ON, MAN? 328 00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:24,872 - SO THERE WE WERE, NOT SPEAKING. 329 00:13:24,872 --> 00:13:26,773 I DESPERATELY WANTED HIM TO SAY SOMETHING. 330 00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:27,975 ANYTHING. 331 00:13:27,975 --> 00:13:29,977 EVEN THOUGH I WAS STUCK ON MUTE. 332 00:13:29,977 --> 00:13:33,213 24 HOURS AGO, MATTY WAS TAKING MY TEMP 333 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:34,481 WITH HIS ALL-BEEF THERMOMETER, 334 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:35,883 AND NOW HE COULDN'T EVEN ASK ME 335 00:13:35,883 --> 00:13:38,151 HOW MUCH FOAM I WANTED. 336 00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,487 - OH, OH. THAT'S--THAT'S PLENTY. 337 00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:41,955 MAYBE HE WAS JUST SHY. 338 00:13:41,955 --> 00:13:44,157 I MEAN, I'D NEVER BEEN OUT WITH HIM BEFORE. 339 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:46,994 FOR ALL I KNOW, HE HAD SOCIAL ANXIETY. 340 00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:50,630 - WHO'S READY FOR SOME HOT TUB ACTION? 341 00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:53,333 [all cheer] - WHOO! 342 00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:57,070 - SO MY SHY THEORY WAS A TAD OFF. 343 00:13:57,070 --> 00:14:01,008 - WHOO! 344 00:14:01,008 --> 00:14:03,010 - I TOLD YOU NO HOT TUB. 345 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:05,913 - I NEEDED AN EXCUSE TO GET IN A BIKINI 346 00:14:05,913 --> 00:14:08,081 SO I COULD LURE JAKE INTO MY ROOM. 347 00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:10,817 BUT DON'T WORRY. I KNOW YOU DON'T DO SWIMSUITS, 348 00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:14,787 SO I BROUGHT YOU ONE OF MY DAD'S SHIRTS. 349 00:14:14,787 --> 00:14:17,357 WHERE'S JAKE? 350 00:14:21,061 --> 00:14:22,562 - LOSE THE CLOTHES, BEER WENCH. 351 00:14:22,562 --> 00:14:23,563 WE'RE GOING IN. 352 00:14:23,563 --> 00:14:26,433 - I THINK I'LL PASS. 353 00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:34,341 - I ONLY MISSED THE CONCERT 354 00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:36,376 'CAUSE I HAD TO GO TO MY PARENTS' DIVORCE PARTY. 355 00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:37,177 BOO. 356 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:38,511 BUT GET ANOTHER DRINK IN ME 357 00:14:38,511 --> 00:14:40,948 AND I CAN MAKE MUSIC IN YOUR PANTS. 358 00:14:40,948 --> 00:14:42,049 - HELLO? 359 00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:43,516 IT WAS A CAREER LOW. 360 00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:45,485 I HAD RESORTED TO THE FAKE PHONE CALL. 361 00:14:45,485 --> 00:14:48,655 OH, I'M JUST CHILLIN' AT THIS KICKBACK. 362 00:14:48,655 --> 00:14:50,523 I WAS PUTTING UP WITH A BUNCH OF ASS-ICLES 363 00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:54,094 JUST TO HANG WITH MATTY, WHO HAD BARELY ACKNOWLEDGED ME. 364 00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:55,762 I GUESS THE ALL-ENCOMPASSING "WE" 365 00:14:55,762 --> 00:14:58,999 I WAS HOPING FOR WASN'T THE "WE" THAT HE WANTED. 366 00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:02,635 - OH, NO, KARAOKE SOUNDS AWESOME. 367 00:15:06,873 --> 00:15:08,641 - HAPPY ANNIVERSARY. 368 00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:09,842 - WHOA. UNH. 369 00:15:09,842 --> 00:15:13,446 - [laughs] - JEEZ, LISS. 370 00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:16,049 - IT'S BEEN THREE MONTHS. - MM-HMM. 371 00:15:16,049 --> 00:15:19,987 - AND I WANT TO REWARD YOU 372 00:15:19,987 --> 00:15:22,255 FOR BEING SO PATIENT. 373 00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:26,459 - OH. I DON'T NEED A REWARD. 374 00:15:26,459 --> 00:15:27,694 WHOA. 375 00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:31,864 - I CAN'T GIVE YOU EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT... 376 00:15:31,864 --> 00:15:33,633 - UH-HUH. 377 00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:37,004 - BUT I CAN GIVE YOU... 378 00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:40,073 MY BE-HYMEN! 379 00:15:40,073 --> 00:15:44,777 JAKE, CAN YOU-- CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THIS? 380 00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:48,048 JAKE? JAKE? 381 00:15:50,817 --> 00:15:52,219 [knock at door] 382 00:15:52,219 --> 00:15:53,420 - JUST A SECOND. 383 00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:58,325 - JENNA, ARE YOU PLAYING VIDEO GAMES? 384 00:15:58,325 --> 00:16:01,028 - OKAY, LOOK, THIS CLEARLY WASN'T A REAL INVITE. 385 00:16:01,028 --> 00:16:02,095 YOU HAVE ENOUGH PICTURES, 386 00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:03,363 SO CAN WE PLEASE JUST GO? 387 00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:05,132 - TWO SKANKS ARE ALL OVER MATTY, 388 00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:06,633 BUT HE HIT THE IGNORE BUTTON. 389 00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:08,801 PROBABLY BECAUSE HE'S WAITING FOR SOME HAMILTON SOUP. 390 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,603 - REALLY? 391 00:16:10,603 --> 00:16:13,073 [dramatic music] 392 00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:14,774 TAMARA WAS RIGHT. 393 00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:16,376 MATTY WASN'T RESPONSIVE. 394 00:16:16,376 --> 00:16:19,746 EVEN THOUGH SLUTS-HER-FACE WAS PRACTICALLY DRY-HUMPING HIM. 395 00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:21,314 - OW. 396 00:16:21,314 --> 00:16:22,315 - I DID WANT TO GO IN. 397 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:23,716 AND WHAT DID I HAVE TO LOSE? 398 00:16:23,716 --> 00:16:25,918 I HAD SOME VICTORIA'S SECRETS OF MY OWN. 399 00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:30,690 - * I CAN FEEL THE SKY CRACKING IN MY HEART * 400 00:16:30,690 --> 00:16:33,193 - I DIDN'T KNOW IF HE WAS GOING OUT OF HIS WAY 401 00:16:33,193 --> 00:16:34,561 TO ANSWER MY QUESTION, 402 00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:37,330 BUT HE COULDN'T HAVE MADE IT ANY CLEARER. 403 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,366 MATTY AND I WEREN'T A "WE" AT ALL. 404 00:16:39,366 --> 00:16:41,668 THERE WAS ONLY ME, AND... 405 00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:44,237 ME WAS DEVASTATED. 406 00:16:56,149 --> 00:16:58,651 - WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, FREAK? 407 00:16:58,651 --> 00:16:59,752 - NOTHING. 408 00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:01,721 - LOOKS LIKE MATTY INVITED A LOT OF PEOPLE. 409 00:17:01,721 --> 00:17:03,823 I'M NOT IN THE MOOD FOR A SOB FEST, 410 00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:07,827 SO WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME AND PRACTICE THE BLOOD VIOLIN? 411 00:17:10,097 --> 00:17:11,731 - YEAH. I'M SORRY. 412 00:17:11,731 --> 00:17:13,300 - OH, YOU WANT TO TAKE THIS INSIDE? 413 00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:17,104 - NO. JUST BACK OFF, PLEASE? 414 00:17:17,104 --> 00:17:18,705 - OKAY, I WANT TO GO, "T." 415 00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:21,541 - BUT I NEED HER TO HOLD UP MY EXTENSIONS. 416 00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,743 - ISN'T THIS AWESOME? OH! 417 00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:25,678 IN A LITTLE WHILE, OKAY? 418 00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:29,349 - IT'S A LITTLE SERENDIP...ITOUS THAT I'M GONNA VOMIT, 419 00:17:29,349 --> 00:17:31,384 BECAUSE NOW I DON'T HAVE TO FEEL GUILTY 420 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:33,353 ABOUT EATING ALL THOSE NACHOS. 421 00:17:33,353 --> 00:17:35,122 - UH, HOLD THAT THOUGHT. 422 00:17:35,122 --> 00:17:37,590 CUP UP, KARLI. 423 00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:39,926 ROMAN SHOWER, COMING THROUGH. 424 00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:43,396 - SPRINKLES, COME HERE, B-- 425 00:17:47,134 --> 00:17:48,135 - HEY, MOM. 426 00:17:48,135 --> 00:17:49,802 - IT'S ONLY 9:15. 427 00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:52,205 OH, PLEASE DON'T TELL ME YOU WANT ME TO PICK YOU UP ALREADY. 428 00:17:52,205 --> 00:17:54,874 - UM, NO, I WAS ACTUALLY, UM, 429 00:17:54,874 --> 00:17:58,178 CALLING BECAUSE THE PARTY'S SO AWESOME, WE MIGHT BE A WHILE. 430 00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:03,416 - HEY. 431 00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:04,851 WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT HERE? 432 00:18:04,851 --> 00:18:06,886 - UH, I DON'T KNOW. 433 00:18:06,886 --> 00:18:08,655 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 434 00:18:08,655 --> 00:18:10,157 - LEAVING. 435 00:18:10,157 --> 00:18:14,661 HEY, YOU NEED A RIDE? 436 00:18:14,661 --> 00:18:16,829 - PLEASE. 437 00:18:19,466 --> 00:18:21,501 - ANYONE WANT TO MAKE OUT WITH ME? 438 00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:26,206 ANYONE? RUNNING SOLO HERE. 439 00:18:38,084 --> 00:18:39,319 - [laughs] 440 00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:41,454 SO LISSA REFUSES TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU, 441 00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:43,723 BUT SHE'LL DO THAT? - YEP. 442 00:18:43,723 --> 00:18:46,359 AND, UM, GET READY TO PISS YOUR PANTS, 443 00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:49,429 BECAUSE SHE CALLED IT HER BE-HYMEN. 444 00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:50,963 - OH, MY GOD. THAT'S GENIUS. 445 00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,732 - I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST TOLD YOU THAT. 446 00:18:52,732 --> 00:18:54,967 - I CAN'T EITHER, BUT I'M GLAD YOU DID. 447 00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:56,203 - REALLY? WHY? 448 00:18:56,203 --> 00:18:57,504 - IT MEANS YOU TRUST ME. 449 00:18:57,504 --> 00:18:59,239 - YOU'RE EASY TO TALK TO. 450 00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:04,211 - I WAS JUST THINKING THE SAME THING. 451 00:19:04,211 --> 00:19:06,045 - SO WHY DID YOU BAIL ON THE PARTY? 452 00:19:06,045 --> 00:19:08,481 - 'CAUSE, UM... 453 00:19:11,318 --> 00:19:13,220 IT SUCKED. 454 00:19:13,220 --> 00:19:15,021 - YEAH, AGREED. 455 00:19:15,021 --> 00:19:17,056 OH, I FORGOT TO MENTION THE PART OF THE STORY 456 00:19:17,056 --> 00:19:18,258 WHERE I COMPLETELY BOLTED. 457 00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:19,926 I MEAN, DOES THAT MAKE ME AN ASS? 458 00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:24,231 - JUST ASS-OPHOBIC. 459 00:19:24,231 --> 00:19:25,332 [cell phone beeps] 460 00:19:25,332 --> 00:19:27,967 - LOOK, I MEAN, I WANT TO DO IT. 461 00:19:27,967 --> 00:19:29,402 YOU KNOW, I'M A GUY. 462 00:19:29,402 --> 00:19:31,238 JUST UNDER DIFFERENT CIRCUMSTANCES. 463 00:19:31,238 --> 00:19:33,473 LIKE MAYBE AFTER WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER LONGER, AND... 464 00:19:33,473 --> 00:19:34,874 DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE? 465 00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:36,909 - I KNEW EXACTLY WHAT HE MEANT. 466 00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:39,111 NOT THAT I WANTED TO TAKE IT UP WITH KARDASHIAN. 467 00:19:39,111 --> 00:19:41,848 BUT MAYBE MATTY AND I SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE ANYTHING 468 00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,616 UNTIL WE KNEW EACH OTHER BETTER. 469 00:19:43,616 --> 00:19:46,353 - MAN. EVERYTHING ON THE RADIO'S REALLY DEPRESSING. 470 00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:48,255 - I HAD BARELY SPENT ANY TIME WITH JAKE, 471 00:19:48,255 --> 00:19:51,123 AND I ALREADY KNEW EXTREMELY INTIMATE STUFF ABOUT HIM. 472 00:19:51,123 --> 00:19:53,660 WEIRD STUFF I DIDN'T REALLY WANT TO KNOW. 473 00:19:53,660 --> 00:19:55,094 - DO YOU HAVE TO BE HOME RIGHT AWAY? 474 00:19:55,094 --> 00:19:57,697 - I HAVE A FEW HOURS TO KILL. 475 00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:04,771 - OH, MY GOD. SOMEONE POOPED. 476 00:20:04,771 --> 00:20:06,606 [all scream] 477 00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:19,018 - WAIT. 478 00:20:19,018 --> 00:20:21,988 DO YOU HEAR THOSE LYRICS? TURN IT UP. 479 00:20:21,988 --> 00:20:25,358 - * DON'T COME KNOCKING ON MY BACK DOOR * 480 00:20:25,358 --> 00:20:29,529 * SAYING DON'T COME KNOCKING ON MY BACK DOOR * 481 00:20:29,529 --> 00:20:31,564 * SAYING ALL THOSE PRETTY WORDS * 482 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:34,401 * YOU SAID BEFORE * 483 00:20:39,171 --> 00:20:41,140 MATTY AGAIN UNTIL WE D-T-R. 484 00:20:41,140 --> 00:20:43,610 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? - DEFINE THE RELATIONSHIP. 485 00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:45,211 - SO AM I GONNA SEE YOU AT THE BONFIRE TONIGHT? 486 00:20:45,211 --> 00:20:47,213 - YOU PROMISED NOT TO HOOK UP AGAIN WITHOUT CLARITY. 487 00:20:47,213 --> 00:20:49,248 - I NEED TO ASK YOU SOMETHING. - YOU BETTER GET IT SOON, 488 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:52,118 BEFORE YOU'RE DUMPSTER HUMPING WITHOUT A SAFETY NET. 489 00:20:52,118 --> 00:20:53,420 - ARE WE TOGETHER? 490 00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:55,388 - NO, NO, NO, NO. I'M WEARING GRANNY PANTIES. 491 00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:56,589 - OH, THAT IS SO HOT. 35080

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