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1
00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:09,200
So, what's everyone doing for
Valentine's Day?
2
00:00:09,840 --> 00:00:13,580
Oh, I'm buying a big box of chocolates,
and then I'm buying a treadmill. Guess
3
00:00:13,580 --> 00:00:14,680
which one I won't be using.
4
00:00:16,079 --> 00:00:19,520
Valentine's Day is a made -up holiday
created by the greeting card people.
5
00:00:19,740 --> 00:00:22,860
The whole purpose is to increase the
gross national product. Well, no, thank
6
00:00:22,860 --> 00:00:25,020
you. Jim Dial isn't buying into that.
7
00:00:25,780 --> 00:00:27,940
Yeah, you didn't get anything for Doris?
8
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:31,980
No, no, I bought her a Cadillac. One
that sings, but no greeting card.
9
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:35,920
Well, I bought Elizabeth a greeting
card. Sucker.
10
00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:41,100
And I also got her a little bauble as
well. I know most of you don't believe
11
00:00:41,100 --> 00:00:44,740
the existence of my girlfriend, having
never seen her, but believe me, she
12
00:00:44,740 --> 00:00:48,520
exists. And to prove it, get a load of
this.
13
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:53,440
She really, she wanted to wait till
Valentine's Day, but she just couldn't.
14
00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:56,100
probably had to get it out of her house
because it was keeping her up at night.
15
00:00:57,020 --> 00:01:00,620
But I don't know, it's not exactly the
kind of thing that I would buy for
16
00:01:00,620 --> 00:01:01,620
myself.
17
00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:04,340
Ever. But, um... I'm just kind of cute.
18
00:01:04,540 --> 00:01:07,340
Well, I haven't seen anything quite like
that. What kind of material do you
19
00:01:07,340 --> 00:01:08,238
think that is?
20
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:09,340
Unborn linoleum.
21
00:01:11,060 --> 00:01:12,160
Morning, everyone.
22
00:01:12,960 --> 00:01:15,320
Sorry I'm late, but the traffic was
hideous.
23
00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:22,900
You know, last night, I, uh... Last
night, uh... Oh, gee, Frank, that shirt
24
00:01:22,900 --> 00:01:25,000
so loud, it's affecting my middle ear.
25
00:01:25,580 --> 00:01:29,100
Elizabeth got it for me. I'm too
nauseous right now to discuss your
26
00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:30,100
friend.
27
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:32,680
But I've got a bit of exciting
information.
28
00:01:33,100 --> 00:01:34,098
Everybody ready?
29
00:01:34,100 --> 00:01:35,039
Yeah, sure. Yeah.
30
00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:37,460
Last night, I had the greatest idea.
31
00:01:38,320 --> 00:01:39,420
FYI goes to Paris.
32
00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:40,760
Oh.
33
00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:42,640
Broadcast outside the Pompidou Center.
34
00:01:42,900 --> 00:01:46,320
I devote stories to the impending
unification of Europe, the common
35
00:01:46,320 --> 00:01:51,260
You know, big stories. Oh, great. So I
took my brainstorm up to the network
36
00:01:51,260 --> 00:01:52,680
brass. How did it go?
37
00:01:53,020 --> 00:01:56,480
Well, they took my idea, worked their
magic on it, and came back with an idea
38
00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:57,480
their own. Yeah?
39
00:01:57,720 --> 00:02:00,180
A show made up of old FYI clips.
40
00:02:00,670 --> 00:02:02,250
Called FYI then and now?
41
00:02:03,010 --> 00:02:04,010
For cable?
42
00:02:04,130 --> 00:02:05,150
What about Paris?
43
00:02:05,550 --> 00:02:09,590
Well, Paris would cost them money. The
cable show will make them money. What do
44
00:02:09,590 --> 00:02:10,590
you think they chose?
45
00:02:11,730 --> 00:02:14,150
Hey, I like your Paris idea better.
46
00:02:14,490 --> 00:02:18,930
Oh, that was a better idea. But here's
the best idea. Me keeping my job? I'm
47
00:02:18,930 --> 00:02:20,030
really keen on that idea.
48
00:02:21,310 --> 00:02:24,890
You know, syndicating the old shows
might not be such a bad thing. It could
49
00:02:24,890 --> 00:02:26,470
nice to see some of our old stories
again.
50
00:02:26,690 --> 00:02:28,410
Yeah, a chance to relive history.
51
00:02:28,890 --> 00:02:31,930
If we do not learn from the mistakes of
the past, we are destined to repeat
52
00:02:31,930 --> 00:02:34,310
them. Yeah, that's exactly what we're
talking about here. Repeat.
53
00:02:34,590 --> 00:02:37,750
You want to rerun the news? If I want to
watch reruns, I'll watch Petticoat
54
00:02:37,750 --> 00:02:41,350
Junction. You know, that is still one of
my mother's favorite shows.
55
00:02:41,590 --> 00:02:45,270
She loves looking down her nose at
Hooterville. I mean, we have a water
56
00:02:45,270 --> 00:02:46,630
back home. We don't bathe in it.
57
00:02:47,270 --> 00:02:49,750
A show like then and now could inform a
whole new generation.
58
00:02:49,990 --> 00:02:50,809
Well, great.
59
00:02:50,810 --> 00:02:51,810
So here's the deal.
60
00:02:52,300 --> 00:02:55,180
Each one of you select your favorite
piece from the past 20 years, and we'll
61
00:02:55,180 --> 00:02:59,120
film a follow -up. But, Kate, I don't
have enough time or energy to do the job
62
00:02:59,120 --> 00:02:59,918
have now.
63
00:02:59,920 --> 00:03:02,820
So I tell you what, why don't you just
pick whatever clips you want, tell me
64
00:03:02,820 --> 00:03:05,680
when the show is, tell me where to
stand, and send me my check.
65
00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:08,540
You can get extra money for this, right?
66
00:03:09,340 --> 00:03:10,860
I have a child.
67
00:03:11,140 --> 00:03:15,640
Well, sure, there's money, table money.
Well, that's a lot, isn't it? Well, it
68
00:03:15,640 --> 00:03:17,340
is when you order it, not when you're on
it.
69
00:03:21,380 --> 00:03:23,040
Entrez, mes amis, mes amis.
70
00:03:23,260 --> 00:03:26,480
You could not go to Paris, so I have
brought Paris to you.
71
00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:30,580
Imagine that you're in a little boîte on
the banks of the Seine. Oh, that's a
72
00:03:30,580 --> 00:03:33,720
nice thought. But we're not there, are
we, Kay? We're in the basement, where
73
00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:35,560
they keep old game show props and
cleaning supplies.
74
00:03:36,540 --> 00:03:39,220
You are so rude, monsieur.
75
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,080
A very Parisienne.
76
00:03:43,700 --> 00:03:47,400
This is going to be so exciting. Just
like watching old home movies at
77
00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:51,100
time. Except Uncle Caleb isn't passed
out face down in the tree water.
78
00:03:51,580 --> 00:03:54,600
Oh, yes, Uncle Caleb. Isn't he the one
who was married to your Aunt Tammy?
79
00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:57,500
Oh, my God, I'm becoming fluent in her
family tree.
80
00:03:58,520 --> 00:03:59,820
Okay, here's the first tape.
81
00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:01,820
Whoa. Oh, my.
82
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,460
Look at all that hair. Look at all that
hair.
83
00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:08,040
Who are you talking about, Frank? I'm
talking about me in that toupee. Oh,
84
00:04:08,100 --> 00:04:10,840
Kay, they made me wear that on the air.
Oh, I love toupees.
85
00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:14,220
There's nothing sexier than a man taking
his hair off in the dark.
86
00:04:16,380 --> 00:04:17,680
Oh, boy, stop right there.
87
00:04:21,089 --> 00:04:22,470
You look so young.
88
00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:25,290
You know, that must have been one of
Jim's very early reports.
89
00:04:25,510 --> 00:04:30,030
We're going live from the deck of the
Mayflower. This is Jim Dialwood. That
90
00:04:30,030 --> 00:04:36,870
have been before electricity, right,
Jim?
91
00:04:37,090 --> 00:04:39,070
What were they using back then? Wood
-burning hammers?
92
00:04:41,330 --> 00:04:45,110
You know, just because you guys are down
here strolling down memory lane is no
93
00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:46,930
excuse not to have donuts upstairs.
94
00:04:51,840 --> 00:04:54,040
Well, don't mind me. I'll just take the
whole tray.
95
00:04:56,100 --> 00:04:59,340
Oh, man. Look how goofy you all look.
96
00:04:59,580 --> 00:05:01,480
Murphy, you might want to leave while
you're still ahead.
97
00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,820
Lloyd, cue the next tape. What do you
mean?
98
00:05:07,220 --> 00:05:08,220
That's not Murphy.
99
00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:10,120
That's a life support system for that
hair.
100
00:05:12,110 --> 00:05:13,530
Oh, that was my Noriega interview.
101
00:05:13,750 --> 00:05:17,190
I was really at the top of my game then.
I got to go on the record on
102
00:05:17,190 --> 00:05:20,510
everything. And yet, you know what I
remember most about that interview?
103
00:05:20,770 --> 00:05:22,730
He had incredibly bad breath.
104
00:05:23,890 --> 00:05:26,570
Really? Well, you'd never know it by
looking at him.
105
00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:29,650
Well, you know, use it or not, it's up
to you.
106
00:05:31,310 --> 00:05:34,130
Or, you know what? Better yet, why don't
you use that interview I did with
107
00:05:34,130 --> 00:05:35,130
Kissinger in Beijing?
108
00:05:35,390 --> 00:05:38,730
I've got an idea. Why don't you sit down
here and pick your own piece? Oh, okay.
109
00:05:38,830 --> 00:05:40,070
Come on, Bonnie. Up, up, up.
110
00:05:43,330 --> 00:05:47,710
Oh, look at those lapels, Jim. Where'd
you get that jacket off a dead clown?
111
00:05:51,830 --> 00:05:55,870
Has anyone seen Corky? Okay, there you
are. Listen, about this Ben and Al
112
00:05:55,910 --> 00:05:58,410
I'm going to need more time. Oh, no, no,
we don't have any more time. We're
113
00:05:58,410 --> 00:06:01,770
already behind schedule. I am having
trouble finding the right story. I've
114
00:06:01,770 --> 00:06:05,170
through hours and hours of tapes of
story after story of mine, and there's
115
00:06:05,170 --> 00:06:06,830
nothing that just sort of jumped out at
me.
116
00:06:07,180 --> 00:06:08,920
Now, when you say jumped out, do you
mean how about?
117
00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:14,420
Because if you do, Frank, I think you're
expecting way too much out of your
118
00:06:14,420 --> 00:06:19,140
pieces. Listen, I just want to have a
story that screams Frank Fontana. Please
119
00:06:19,140 --> 00:06:20,640
don't scream at me, okay?
120
00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:26,680
You know, a signature piece, like John
Chancellor, the 68 Convention, or Dan
121
00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:30,860
Rather, the Galveston Hurricanes. Robin
Leach, Jaja's walk -in clock. Yes!
122
00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:34,780
You see, even Robin Leach has a
signature story, and I don't!
123
00:06:37,219 --> 00:06:38,960
Oh, he wants a piece that jumps out.
124
00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:40,400
See,
125
00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:42,740
Corky didn't jump out when I went...
126
00:06:42,740 --> 00:06:50,480
Corky,
127
00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:53,560
you know what I think would be great?
The piece you did on Mrs. Dale and her
128
00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:54,560
cookie franchise.
129
00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,940
Really? Because I was thinking about
going to my air traffic controller's
130
00:06:57,940 --> 00:07:00,620
report. Well, now that was a good
report, but...
131
00:07:00,910 --> 00:07:04,910
You did that just a little while ago.
The title of the show isn't just a
132
00:07:04,910 --> 00:07:08,490
while ago and now. It's then and now.
Give me some then. Now.
133
00:07:09,790 --> 00:07:11,650
Well, how far back should I go? Here?
134
00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:13,170
Porky. Then?
135
00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:16,950
Think then. When I watch your tape, I
want to see dinosaurs roaming the earth.
136
00:07:19,290 --> 00:07:20,410
Wow, Lloyd.
137
00:07:21,290 --> 00:07:23,790
I've never seen you standing up. You're
tall.
138
00:07:24,450 --> 00:07:25,349
Not really.
139
00:07:25,350 --> 00:07:27,270
I guess in my mind, you're...
140
00:07:27,790 --> 00:07:28,950
You're about this tall.
141
00:07:29,910 --> 00:07:33,550
Corky, I brought up one of your tapes
that we missed. I think it's pretty
142
00:07:33,790 --> 00:07:34,749
Oh, okay.
143
00:07:34,750 --> 00:07:35,750
Thanks, Lloyd.
144
00:07:37,070 --> 00:07:39,410
So what do you think? I like it. It's
very thin.
145
00:07:40,010 --> 00:07:42,290
I don't. What about it don't you like?
146
00:07:43,170 --> 00:07:44,930
It's a story I did on makeup.
147
00:07:45,390 --> 00:07:47,270
I don't want to be known for my fluff
pieces.
148
00:07:47,710 --> 00:07:48,710
But I like those.
149
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:53,070
They're light and breezy. The rest of
the news is so hard to take. When Corky
150
00:07:53,070 --> 00:07:54,490
Sherwood is on, I know I can...
151
00:07:54,860 --> 00:07:56,540
Switch off half my brain and smile.
152
00:07:58,080 --> 00:07:59,080
Thanks,
153
00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:00,320
Lloyd. Anytime.
154
00:08:03,180 --> 00:08:07,100
See, I don't want to be the Sally Field
of FYI.
155
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:11,920
A mature woman doing good work by day,
flying nightly over the Convent San
156
00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:12,920
Tonko.
157
00:08:13,380 --> 00:08:17,280
I think you're overreacting, Corky. It's
always difficult to watch yourself on
158
00:08:17,280 --> 00:08:19,280
videotape. Just ask Pamela Lee.
159
00:08:22,030 --> 00:08:24,790
It's funny how I built up this whole
image of myself as a reporter.
160
00:08:25,470 --> 00:08:27,090
Now I realize I wasn't even close.
161
00:08:28,350 --> 00:08:32,350
You know, I probably sat through at
least 200 of these old tapes. It's funny
162
00:08:32,350 --> 00:08:37,390
I built up an image of myself, and it
turns out I'm even better than I
163
00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:41,150
Not to be immodest, but I think I may be
a god.
164
00:08:45,850 --> 00:08:47,010
Good, isn't it, Lloyd?
165
00:08:47,230 --> 00:08:48,230
Very good.
166
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,760
Are you kidding? It's great. It's
spectacular.
167
00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:54,480
Do me a favor. Run off about 40 copies
of this, will you? They'll make great
168
00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:55,700
stocking stuffers at Christmas.
169
00:08:57,380 --> 00:08:59,980
What about that 83 interview with
Margaret Thatcher?
170
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:05,020
You see, the trouble with the 83
Thatcher is it's not in TFC. It's shot
171
00:09:05,160 --> 00:09:08,820
Now, we can do a clean digital
conversion, but the color balance is
172
00:09:08,820 --> 00:09:09,820
to be a little hinky.
173
00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:15,120
What? Hinky. You know, not up to your
exacting Murphy Brown standards.
174
00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:20,190
Oh, jeez. I must have put in last
month's Thatcher by mistake. Give me a
175
00:09:20,550 --> 00:09:21,950
It's okay. Just take it off, boy.
176
00:09:24,870 --> 00:09:25,809
This is perfect.
177
00:09:25,810 --> 00:09:28,690
This is it. I'm going to use my Libyan
piece for the then -and -now kickoff.
178
00:09:28,870 --> 00:09:31,190
Great, Jim. You were so confident and
powerful.
179
00:09:31,970 --> 00:09:34,030
You know, I miss seeing you in the
field.
180
00:09:34,370 --> 00:09:35,870
And you look great in that Savari
jacket.
181
00:09:36,210 --> 00:09:36,969
Oh, thank you.
182
00:09:36,970 --> 00:09:39,270
That small travel iron really came in
handy that day.
183
00:09:40,530 --> 00:09:43,890
Didn't waste your time with any of those
soft questions. You just went right at
184
00:09:43,890 --> 00:09:44,849
him. Yes.
185
00:09:44,850 --> 00:09:45,850
Ah, Jim.
186
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:47,340
Corky, how's it going?
187
00:09:47,680 --> 00:09:50,540
Great. We were just looking at Jim Libby
in peace. Oh, good choice.
188
00:09:50,940 --> 00:09:54,980
Kay, Kay, I have to applaud you. The
whole then and now show has really
189
00:09:54,980 --> 00:09:58,000
my fire. Well, I am glad to have you and
Murphy on board.
190
00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:01,960
Now, Corky, if you and Frank could just
catch the fever, I wouldn't have to use
191
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:04,260
phrases like on board and catch the
fever.
192
00:10:04,940 --> 00:10:09,100
Corky, we promised to do this. The
network has been very good to us, and I
193
00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:10,700
expect all of us to stand by our word.
194
00:10:11,420 --> 00:10:13,800
Keep that thought handy, Jim, because...
195
00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,920
The network went nuts for your
Afghanistan blooper.
196
00:10:17,940 --> 00:10:21,300
What? No, no, no, no, no, no. Not that,
no.
197
00:10:21,700 --> 00:10:22,700
Sweet Lorraine.
198
00:10:23,380 --> 00:10:25,780
You stumble for one word on the air.
199
00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:29,660
One unintentional gap and it haunts you
for the rest of your life. Well, the
200
00:10:29,660 --> 00:10:32,720
boys upstairs think it's great and they
want to lead off the opening episode
201
00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:36,460
with it. What? No, Kay, you can't use
that. It's cruel.
202
00:10:36,740 --> 00:10:38,540
Yes. Wet my pants funny.
203
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:40,880
But cruel.
204
00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:47,280
If that's what the suits want, to force
me to relive the indignities of that
205
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:51,460
event, then, well, I'm sorry, but I'm no
longer on board. Oh, no, no. Come on
206
00:10:51,460 --> 00:10:52,460
now, Chad. I'm sorry, Kay.
207
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:58,300
You know, Kay, I'm beginning to think
this whole then and now thing is just a
208
00:10:58,300 --> 00:10:59,300
bad idea.
209
00:11:01,700 --> 00:11:02,840
Oh, good, Murphy.
210
00:11:03,060 --> 00:11:06,920
Your colleagues are losing enthusiasm
for the show. They're like eunuchs in an
211
00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:07,920
orgy.
212
00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:10,180
Not now, Kay. I've got to go.
213
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:11,620
Go? Go where?
214
00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:13,360
Philadelphia. Philadelphia?
215
00:11:13,940 --> 00:11:17,680
Yeah, it's where I grew up. Look, you've
got my footage. I shot my follow -up.
216
00:11:17,700 --> 00:11:20,040
Do what you have to do. I need to go
home. No.
217
00:11:20,660 --> 00:11:26,920
Murphy, you... Hey, Kay, Kay, where's
Murphy? Lloyd said something happened in
218
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:28,680
editing. She just left. Where'd she go?
219
00:11:29,020 --> 00:11:30,820
Philadelphia. Something about going
home.
220
00:11:31,460 --> 00:11:34,460
Man. Where are you going now? I'm going
to go see if I can catch her. No, what
221
00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:38,080
about your piece? Then it now goes on
the air tonight. Oh, hey, look. Here it
222
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:38,959
is. It's good.
223
00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:39,960
It doesn't scream.
224
00:11:39,980 --> 00:11:43,220
It doesn't jump. It just... sort of
whispers Frank Montana.
225
00:11:49,460 --> 00:11:50,460
You want me to drive?
226
00:11:50,920 --> 00:11:54,480
What, you think I'm driving too fast?
No, no, no, no. I'm sure that ambulance
227
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:55,480
was going backwards.
228
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:57,260
Thanks for coming, Frank.
229
00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:01,000
Oh, you know, I haven't been to
Philadelphia for a while.
230
00:12:01,660 --> 00:12:02,660
Cheese steak.
231
00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:06,340
And, you know, I can see where you grew
up. It'll be fun.
232
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:08,480
Oh, no.
233
00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:18,580
Hi, honey, it's me. Look, you know, I'm
not going to be able to make it for
234
00:12:18,580 --> 00:12:22,540
dinner tonight. I'm with Murphy. It's a
long story.
235
00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:25,580
You know what?
236
00:12:25,860 --> 00:12:29,700
Would you talk to her? Because it's
funny, she doesn't believe you exist.
237
00:12:31,380 --> 00:12:32,380
Here she is.
238
00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:35,740
Hello? Hello?
239
00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:38,040
Elizabeth?
240
00:12:38,940 --> 00:12:39,940
What?
241
00:12:41,620 --> 00:12:44,500
Oh, you know, we just probably were
going through one of those zones.
242
00:12:44,940 --> 00:12:46,420
Yeah, the No Elizabeth Zone.
243
00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:51,920
Keeping your eye out for our exit.
244
00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:53,120
Yes, yes.
245
00:12:54,780 --> 00:12:57,400
So, why are you going to go back to your
old house?
246
00:12:58,120 --> 00:12:59,200
I don't know exactly.
247
00:13:00,520 --> 00:13:01,980
What happened in the editing room?
248
00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:05,720
Well, something just hit me when I was
watching myself on tape.
249
00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:09,960
You know, when I was a kid, I used to
sit in my bedroom and tear out the
250
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:12,540
and dream about what my life was going
to be.
251
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:14,120
I was invincible.
252
00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:18,400
Maybe if I could go back there for just
five minutes and look out that window,
253
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,420
maybe I could make sense out of all
this.
254
00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:22,740
Maybe I won't find anything at all.
255
00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:25,680
Either way, we'll get a good cheesesteak
out of the deal.
256
00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:33,740
God, I can't believe it. This is it.
257
00:13:35,500 --> 00:13:38,520
5405 Randall Street, where it all began.
258
00:13:39,420 --> 00:13:41,940
Where the splendor unfurled.
259
00:13:42,220 --> 00:13:45,660
Where I thirst first forth to take on
the world.
260
00:13:47,300 --> 00:13:49,720
I'm loving my cheesesteak here.
261
00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:52,460
No, I think there's any onions.
262
00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:56,480
It's always about you, isn't it, Chris?
263
00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:02,600
The Maggios live right there across the
street. I remember Mrs. Maggio used to
264
00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:05,280
stand outside and call her daughter,
Meg!
265
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:11,860
Oh, Frank, look.
266
00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:16,520
They took out the rose bushes. My mother
planted the most beautiful roses all
267
00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:18,960
along here. Remember why you're here?
Come on.
268
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:28,720
You can see a look on these people's
faces when they open the door and see
269
00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,600
Murphy Brown on their front desk.
270
00:14:38,610 --> 00:14:39,890
Yes. Hello.
271
00:14:40,310 --> 00:14:41,670
My name is Murphy Brown.
272
00:14:42,450 --> 00:14:43,450
Yes.
273
00:14:44,490 --> 00:14:46,350
Well, I used to live in this house.
274
00:14:46,570 --> 00:14:47,570
Oh, really?
275
00:14:47,650 --> 00:14:52,250
Yes, yes. My parents brought me straight
here from the hospital, and I lived
276
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:56,010
here until I was in ninth grade. Now,
for most kids, that would be 14, but in
277
00:14:56,010 --> 00:14:59,130
case, I was 13. You see, I was very
advanced verbally, so I skipped second
278
00:14:59,130 --> 00:15:00,130
grade.
279
00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:06,700
Anyway, my friend and I, this is my
friend Frank, we drove all the way up
280
00:15:06,700 --> 00:15:10,480
Washington, and I was wondering if it
wouldn't be too much of an inconvenience
281
00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:14,100
if we could just look around, you know,
for old time's sake.
282
00:15:14,340 --> 00:15:15,360
I'm sorry. No.
283
00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:22,140
Are we out of here? No.
284
00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:23,360
Yeah.
285
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:29,980
Maybe I haven't made myself clear.
286
00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:35,240
You see, I haven't been here in almost
40 years, and I just wanted to look into
287
00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:40,680
what was once my house, go inside, walk
up the stairs, sit on my bed, okay, your
288
00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:42,420
bed, and look out the window.
289
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:46,140
You mean the room at the top of the
stairs? Yes, that's my room.
290
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,360
I'm sorry, no.
291
00:15:49,180 --> 00:15:51,760
Oh, geez, now I know we're not leaving.
292
00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:53,120
Yes.
293
00:15:57,380 --> 00:15:58,440
Five minutes.
294
00:15:59,420 --> 00:16:01,880
lousy minutes out of your life. What are
you doing in there? Putting the
295
00:16:01,880 --> 00:16:03,380
finishing touches on the Mona Lisa?
296
00:16:03,580 --> 00:16:04,580
Let me in.
297
00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:06,580
I don't want to.
298
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:13,380
All right. Fine, lady. But you're
ruining the beauty of the moment. Okay.
299
00:16:14,260 --> 00:16:16,740
But come on. Let's just go now.
300
00:16:16,940 --> 00:16:20,780
I can't believe I came all this way for
nothing.
301
00:16:24,780 --> 00:16:25,780
Wait a minute.
302
00:16:26,220 --> 00:16:27,300
Have you got any matches?
303
00:16:27,580 --> 00:16:31,200
Oh, please. You're not going to run the
lady's house down now. Come on. No, no,
304
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:36,580
no. I need some light. You see, I buried
something right under here a long time
305
00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:40,720
ago. If I can just... You know what?
There's a shed around the back. I'm sure
306
00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:43,520
there's a shovel. Go, go. But I am not
going to a shed.
307
00:16:45,060 --> 00:16:46,820
You know, you didn't have to come.
308
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:52,020
And be quiet.
309
00:16:58,769 --> 00:17:00,370
So where's the shovel?
310
00:17:00,710 --> 00:17:05,430
It's like a giant German shepherd back
there. Is he using the shovel?
311
00:17:13,349 --> 00:17:17,589
Oh, darn.
312
00:17:18,089 --> 00:17:20,430
I've got a spot on my new shoes.
313
00:17:22,710 --> 00:17:24,369
That's it. I am out of here.
314
00:17:25,290 --> 00:17:26,049
I'm not done.
315
00:17:26,050 --> 00:17:28,530
I have been digging for 45 minutes. I'm
done.
316
00:17:28,750 --> 00:17:31,990
Give me that shovel. You are not going
to find anything. You're just wasting
317
00:17:31,990 --> 00:17:32,990
your time.
318
00:17:35,490 --> 00:17:37,350
I have to do everything.
319
00:17:42,210 --> 00:17:45,550
Give me that. That's my dad's old ammo
box.
320
00:17:45,850 --> 00:17:47,010
Oh, my God.
321
00:17:47,970 --> 00:17:50,550
And this is what I've ruined a good pair
of pants for?
322
00:17:52,330 --> 00:17:54,590
This is my old little time capsule.
323
00:17:55,020 --> 00:17:56,020
This is history.
324
00:17:56,060 --> 00:17:57,080
Yeah, or junk.
325
00:17:57,300 --> 00:18:01,780
What if I open this and unleash all
sorts of evil onto the world?
326
00:18:03,180 --> 00:18:04,500
You already have.
327
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:09,020
My back is killing me. I hope they've
got some Advil in there.
328
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:16,580
Look at this, Frank. All my old stuff.
329
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:20,200
My Kennedy Johnson campaign buttons.
330
00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:24,850
My... Tickets stopped from when I went
to American Bandstand.
331
00:18:26,790 --> 00:18:30,030
Oh, my old retainer.
332
00:18:31,210 --> 00:18:35,230
What's the sentimental value of that?
Nothing. I hated it so much, I buried
333
00:18:37,110 --> 00:18:38,110
What's this?
334
00:18:38,690 --> 00:18:40,650
Oh, be careful. That's my letter to
Fabian.
335
00:18:41,930 --> 00:18:46,350
Dear Fabian, even though you have chosen
not to write me back, I look at your
336
00:18:46,350 --> 00:18:48,050
picture every night on my wall.
337
00:18:48,570 --> 00:18:52,230
It's the last thing I see before I dream
of you. I'll love you forever. Oh, how
338
00:18:52,230 --> 00:18:53,230
sweet.
339
00:18:53,930 --> 00:18:55,350
It was Fabian.
340
00:18:57,670 --> 00:18:59,570
Oh, hey, hey, Frank, look at this.
341
00:19:00,110 --> 00:19:01,110
Tasty cakes.
342
00:19:01,130 --> 00:19:03,950
There wasn't a better snack cake in
America.
343
00:19:05,350 --> 00:19:07,890
Look at this. There's no inspiration in
it. I wonder if they're still good.
344
00:19:08,050 --> 00:19:10,870
Here, Frank, try them. I'm not going to
eat a 40 -year -old cake.
345
00:19:11,770 --> 00:19:12,770
Oh, Jesus.
346
00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:16,070
Mer, is any of this helping you?
347
00:19:16,910 --> 00:19:17,910
I don't know.
348
00:19:21,900 --> 00:19:23,460
What are you doing?
349
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:29,120
Now, Frank, what are you doing with that
shovel in your hand? Oh, madam, I am so
350
00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:32,620
sorry. You know, perhaps if I could just
go upstairs to my bedroom and have a
351
00:19:32,620 --> 00:19:34,380
quick look around. I've called the
police.
352
00:19:55,660 --> 00:19:59,080
prepared for a big bar tab because
that's the only thing that's going to
353
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,020
here watching this whole then and now
thing.
354
00:20:01,740 --> 00:20:05,300
Well, I have to confess, I had no idea
that proposing a clip show would stir
355
00:20:05,300 --> 00:20:10,160
things up so much. I sent you guys into
a tailspin, Murphy to Philadelphia, and
356
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:12,560
me, I finished off a whole bottle of
Harvey's bristle cream.
357
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,660
So if you see a few choppy edits, you'll
understand why.
358
00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:18,480
Are you going to be all right?
359
00:20:18,900 --> 00:20:19,900
Oh, yeah.
360
00:20:19,980 --> 00:20:23,960
You know, going back to Philadelphia
reminded me of my childhood and all the
361
00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:25,440
things I wanted to do with my life.
362
00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:28,260
And you know what? I exceeded my
expectations.
363
00:20:28,580 --> 00:20:30,860
I would have been happy if I just
married Fabian.
364
00:20:31,340 --> 00:20:35,220
What a mistake that would have been.
Murphy Fabian. That would have been
365
00:20:35,220 --> 00:20:36,220
from the start.
366
00:20:37,020 --> 00:20:42,100
I guess looking back at the last 20
years of FYI and even back at my
367
00:20:42,100 --> 00:20:45,620
made me realize I wouldn't have done
anything differently.
368
00:20:45,940 --> 00:20:47,000
Really? No regrets?
369
00:20:48,110 --> 00:20:50,030
Well, that's not entirely true.
370
00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:53,090
There's a couple of Elliot Gould movies
I wish I hadn't seen.
371
00:20:54,530 --> 00:20:59,230
But if everyone at this table stopped
and thought about it, you'd save
372
00:20:59,230 --> 00:21:00,230
yourselves a trip home.
373
00:21:00,770 --> 00:21:04,070
Rudy! Rudy, how come you don't have
Channel 21 on?
374
00:21:04,290 --> 00:21:07,490
Oh. Then and now has already started.
Back to local communist regime.
375
00:21:07,810 --> 00:21:10,130
Oh, God. What have we learned from
Afstenigan?
376
00:21:12,170 --> 00:21:13,170
Afstenigan.
377
00:21:13,830 --> 00:21:16,810
Silly. Of course, I'm referring to the
country south of Uzbekistan.
378
00:21:18,949 --> 00:21:20,570
Afghanistan. Where the rugs come from?
379
00:21:20,890 --> 00:21:22,230
Afghanistan. Again.
380
00:21:23,110 --> 00:21:24,450
Could somebody please help me out?
381
00:21:25,070 --> 00:21:26,430
Or at least put me out of my misery.
30547
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