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1
00:00:08,499 --> 00:00:11,380
I'm just not good at this sort of thing.
Oh, come on, Jim.
2
00:00:11,780 --> 00:00:14,960
If Doris were going on a trip and she
wanted to leave you a little love note,
3
00:00:15,040 --> 00:00:16,640
what kind of thing would you want her to
say?
4
00:00:17,020 --> 00:00:18,800
Well, I don't know. There's turkey salad
in the fridge.
5
00:00:19,260 --> 00:00:20,260
That's not romantic.
6
00:00:20,700 --> 00:00:23,120
It is if it's in the shape of a breast.
Now, please, Gorky, ask someone.
7
00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:25,420
Ask what? What are you doing?
8
00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:29,590
Well, since we're all going away on
location, I thought... leave a romantic
9
00:00:29,590 --> 00:00:33,030
little note for Will to open each of the
four days I'm gone. That way he won't
10
00:00:33,030 --> 00:00:33,909
miss me as much.
11
00:00:33,910 --> 00:00:36,730
I've written all the messages, but I'm
not happy with the last one. So what
12
00:00:36,730 --> 00:00:39,310
you got so far? Frank, we have a lot to
do today. We don't have time for this.
13
00:00:39,610 --> 00:00:40,610
Day one.
14
00:00:40,630 --> 00:00:43,990
Dear Will, I'm counting the days until
I'm back in your arms.
15
00:00:44,390 --> 00:00:45,309
Day two.
16
00:00:45,310 --> 00:00:48,430
Honey, I'm thinking about your wonderful
kisses all the time.
17
00:00:49,170 --> 00:00:50,170
Day three.
18
00:00:50,430 --> 00:00:53,530
Sweetheart, I had a dream about you and
I can't wait to make it real.
19
00:00:54,390 --> 00:00:55,289
Day four.
20
00:00:55,290 --> 00:00:56,310
Clean the cat box.
21
00:00:58,190 --> 00:00:59,169
Murphy, put the notes away.
22
00:00:59,170 --> 00:01:01,750
Clean the cat box, darling. Put the
notes away. Put the notes away away.
23
00:01:05,410 --> 00:01:06,410
All right, now.
24
00:01:06,770 --> 00:01:10,490
I just wanted to get you all together
once more before we leave for
25
00:01:10,490 --> 00:01:11,490
tomorrow night.
26
00:01:11,850 --> 00:01:13,430
In a minute, Murphy. Let me finish.
27
00:01:14,310 --> 00:01:19,530
The network has laid out a very
impressive ad campaign because they
28
00:01:19,530 --> 00:01:23,510
I, that the idea to profile a small
American town is a very important one.
29
00:01:24,060 --> 00:01:28,000
I have here the entire itinerary for you
and your segment producers, including
30
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,580
your air tickets. What, Murphy?
31
00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:32,760
What could you possibly have to say that
could be so important you can't wait
32
00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:33,579
until I'm finished?
33
00:01:33,580 --> 00:01:35,360
I don't think we should go to
Pottersville tomorrow.
34
00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:37,000
What are you talking about?
35
00:01:37,300 --> 00:01:38,980
I think we should leave for Pottersville
tonight.
36
00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:40,260
We can't leave tonight.
37
00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:44,640
Come on, you guys. We're devoting an
entire hour to coverage of life in a
38
00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:48,800
town. We can't do that in four days. I
say we take a fifth day and leave
39
00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:52,290
tonight. First of all, we don't have the
budget for five days of location work.
40
00:01:52,530 --> 00:01:55,910
Secondly, I have planned our schedule
very carefully to cover as much ground
41
00:01:55,910 --> 00:02:00,270
possible. And thirdly, it's Audrey's
birthday tonight. We have reservations
42
00:02:00,270 --> 00:02:01,270
Sardellas.
43
00:02:02,030 --> 00:02:06,170
So this is our priority now. Gee,
America, sorry we couldn't bring you FYI
44
00:02:06,170 --> 00:02:09,810
tonight. But let's go now to Sardella's
where an angry Miles has just discovered
45
00:02:09,810 --> 00:02:10,810
beets on his salad.
46
00:02:11,290 --> 00:02:14,950
Oh, come on. If I thought for one minute
that staying an extra day in
47
00:02:14,950 --> 00:02:17,150
Pottersville would make for a better
story, I'd be there.
48
00:02:17,370 --> 00:02:20,630
I think Miles is right, Murphy. This
schedule seems to include all the
49
00:02:20,630 --> 00:02:24,090
areas. Community life, civic affairs,
cultural activities.
50
00:02:25,010 --> 00:02:28,670
Although I noticed you have me covering
the annual frog jumping contest.
51
00:02:29,530 --> 00:02:32,430
I don't have to touch the frogs, do I?
No, Jim. Oh, good. So it seems as though
52
00:02:32,430 --> 00:02:36,570
an extra day really isn't necessary,
especially since Doris has the flu and I
53
00:02:36,570 --> 00:02:37,910
wouldn't mind taking care of her
tonight.
54
00:02:38,370 --> 00:02:40,510
Oh, that's so sweet.
55
00:02:41,850 --> 00:02:45,290
Guys, what is this neurotic obsession
with loved ones?
56
00:02:45,550 --> 00:02:49,630
I mean, are you going to sit at the
Emmys next year and watch CNN and
57
00:02:49,630 --> 00:02:50,650
walk away with everything?
58
00:02:50,910 --> 00:02:53,910
Murphy's right. We've been doing our own
research, and there are a lot of great
59
00:02:53,910 --> 00:02:57,910
details we should be covering. For
instance, there's a weekly poker game
60
00:02:57,910 --> 00:03:01,610
Scotty's gas station. Those guys talk
about everything from the war in the
61
00:03:01,610 --> 00:03:02,610
to women's hemlines.
62
00:03:02,990 --> 00:03:05,510
If that poker game goes, so will the
rest of this country.
63
00:03:05,710 --> 00:03:09,310
Right. Now, what about Mayor Foley? Are
we just going to set up a camera in his
64
00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:12,850
office and let him tell us what a
wonderful place Pottersville is to
65
00:03:12,850 --> 00:03:15,530
are we going to find out why there's
been an increase in teenage drug
66
00:03:15,890 --> 00:03:19,050
Miles, it's easy for them to leave
tonight. They have no one in their
67
00:03:19,330 --> 00:03:21,830
Frank has just one meaningless encounter
after the other.
68
00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:31,700
Look, you two, you've both made some
very good points, but I still don't
69
00:03:31,700 --> 00:03:32,700
it's necessary to leave tonight.
70
00:03:33,180 --> 00:03:37,340
Oh, well, that's just swell, Miles. And
you call yourself a journalist. Well,
71
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:40,480
let me tell you, if I were running this
show, I'd have us on the next plane.
72
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:44,280
The man's judgment is in his shorts.
He's not confident to leave this
73
00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:47,840
Next thing you know, he'll be planning
our assignments with a Ouija board. I'm
74
00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:49,780
telling you, the man has lost touch with
reality.
75
00:03:50,020 --> 00:03:53,260
And if we really care about him, the
kindest thing we can do is to call the
76
00:03:53,260 --> 00:03:55,360
authorities and have him locked up
before he hurts somebody.
77
00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:57,620
I'm finished.
78
00:03:59,839 --> 00:04:00,839
Amazing, isn't it?
79
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:04,180
That such a loud noise could come out of
such a small opening in the head.
80
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,020
I hear that voice in my sleep.
81
00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:11,100
Maybe they should pipe it into
cornfields to scare the crows away.
82
00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:13,260
She's killing me, Jim.
83
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,459
I have mail locks delivered to my house
by the case.
84
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:19,420
I'm blinking constantly for no reason.
Just blinking.
85
00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:20,640
Blinking all the time.
86
00:04:21,240 --> 00:04:24,020
I'm going to be deaf all the time. I'm
30. You just have to make it to 32.
87
00:04:24,020 --> 00:04:25,360
That's my number in the office pool.
88
00:04:28,390 --> 00:04:31,750
Always side with her. I know what goes
on. You call each other at night to plot
89
00:04:31,750 --> 00:04:33,030
little ways to drive me crazy.
90
00:04:33,250 --> 00:04:35,870
Well, guess what? It's not going to work
this time. You know why?
91
00:04:36,650 --> 00:04:40,230
I'm going to send you both to
Potterville tonight. Just the two of
92
00:04:40,230 --> 00:04:43,390
there. Never come back for all I care.
That's all I have to say. This meeting
93
00:04:43,390 --> 00:04:44,390
adjourned.
94
00:04:50,890 --> 00:04:51,890
Hello again.
95
00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:55,250
I'm sorry to interrupt you. Have you
decided what you're having for dinner?
96
00:04:55,390 --> 00:04:56,630
Chicken. Chicken.
97
00:04:57,010 --> 00:04:58,010
Good.
98
00:04:58,120 --> 00:04:59,120
And what about you, sir?
99
00:04:59,180 --> 00:05:00,400
Well, I'm not sure how is the chicken.
100
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:01,680
Oh, just awful.
101
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:07,840
There's only one order left, but I'd be
happy to set it aside for you. Oh, would
102
00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:12,120
you really? That's very nice of you,
Vicki. Oh, I'm pleased to do it for you,
103
00:05:12,140 --> 00:05:14,260
sir. Oh, please, call me Frank.
104
00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:16,280
I know who you are.
105
00:05:17,460 --> 00:05:20,940
I watch you on television every
Wednesday night when I'm not flying.
106
00:05:21,740 --> 00:05:24,480
Tell me, Vicki, do you live in
Washington?
107
00:05:25,150 --> 00:05:30,890
No, I live in Chicago, but I spend a lot
of time in Washington. You know, I get
108
00:05:30,890 --> 00:05:34,590
to Chicago a lot during the year. Maybe
the next time I... Oh, come on, Frank.
109
00:05:34,710 --> 00:05:38,250
You have me to sit near the window? Now
you're practically in my lap. Aren't you
110
00:05:38,250 --> 00:05:40,570
behind all the salads? And where's my
ginger ale?
111
00:05:41,090 --> 00:05:42,190
I'll check on it.
112
00:05:42,530 --> 00:05:46,250
Would you like an extra bag of nuts,
Frank? He's got more nuts than he knows
113
00:05:46,250 --> 00:05:47,250
what to do with.
114
00:05:48,190 --> 00:05:55,170
Nice going, Murph. I was this... Close
from a date with an angel. You are so
115
00:05:55,170 --> 00:05:58,590
easy, Frank. You fall all over the woman
just because she says she'll save you
116
00:05:58,590 --> 00:06:01,810
the last order of beef. How could it be
the last order of beef? We're in the
117
00:06:01,810 --> 00:06:02,809
first row.
118
00:06:02,810 --> 00:06:06,390
Oh, so it was the old last order of beef
trick. You think I didn't see through
119
00:06:06,390 --> 00:06:10,350
that? She has incredible eyes, doesn't
she? I don't usually get around to the
120
00:06:10,350 --> 00:06:12,250
eyes right away, but hers are way above
that.
121
00:06:13,090 --> 00:06:15,190
You are some piece of work, Frank.
122
00:06:15,710 --> 00:06:16,710
I know.
123
00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:21,960
Oh, this is great, isn't it? You and me
on assignment together.
124
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:25,920
Gee, we haven't done this in a long
time. No, and we're going to do a great
125
00:06:25,940 --> 00:06:28,740
too. We're going to get out there and
give those 60 -minute guys a run for
126
00:06:28,740 --> 00:06:30,340
money. I really love the road.
127
00:06:30,580 --> 00:06:31,439
Me, too.
128
00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:34,940
New places, new faces, no commitment.
That's getting the story.
129
00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:38,760
And if you get a good hotel, they leave
a little piece of candy on your pillow
130
00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:40,340
at night. I really love that.
131
00:06:42,280 --> 00:06:44,460
We're out of ginger ale. Here's a V8.
132
00:06:45,220 --> 00:06:47,100
And here's a little something for you,
Frank.
133
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:49,659
Slipper socks.
134
00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,380
Oh, yeah, she wants me.
135
00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:55,160
Okay, Frank, hypothetical question.
136
00:06:55,580 --> 00:07:00,620
What if you went out with her and, say,
over dessert or whatever, suddenly you
137
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:02,300
realized this is the one?
138
00:07:02,540 --> 00:07:04,180
What? The one what?
139
00:07:04,900 --> 00:07:08,420
The woman. The person that turns you
around, makes you want to change your
140
00:07:08,580 --> 00:07:09,840
You mean settle down, me?
141
00:07:10,140 --> 00:07:11,140
Forget it.
142
00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:15,280
Except for the fact that I haven't
played wide receiver in the Super Bowl
143
00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:16,780
would say that my life is pretty
perfect.
144
00:07:18,140 --> 00:07:19,140
What about you?
145
00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:23,500
Gee, I'd love to stay and chat, but it's
only an hour until we land, and I still
146
00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:24,500
have a question.
147
00:07:24,580 --> 00:07:28,160
Sure, she can dish it out, but she can't
take it. Well, that's fine. I've got my
148
00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:29,860
New York Times crossword puzzle here.
149
00:07:30,100 --> 00:07:34,320
And you know what? I am going to fly in
the face of fate. I'm going to do it in
150
00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:35,320
ink.
151
00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:43,320
Was that a little lightning or
something? Yeah, probably.
152
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:45,120
Looks like we're running into some
weather.
153
00:07:50,900 --> 00:07:54,500
It's uncanny, isn't it? The turbulence
always starts right before the meal
154
00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:55,500
service.
155
00:07:57,600 --> 00:07:59,860
These people are unbelievable.
156
00:08:00,300 --> 00:08:02,920
Hey, could you keep it down, please? I'm
trying to get some work done.
157
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:05,740
You pay for first class.
158
00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:07,740
Murph, I think we're losing altitude.
159
00:08:08,220 --> 00:08:09,360
Oh, it's just an air pocket.
160
00:08:09,580 --> 00:08:10,580
A big air pocket.
161
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:14,580
It's probably nothing.
162
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,580
How many miles have we logged between us
thousands, huh?
163
00:08:18,220 --> 00:08:20,760
I'm sure if there was a problem, we
would have heard from the pilot.
164
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:22,600
Here comes the pilot, Murph.
165
00:08:24,380 --> 00:08:26,140
He seems calm, though.
166
00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:28,300
Seems like there's nothing wrong.
167
00:08:30,540 --> 00:08:34,140
Not a good sign.
168
00:08:35,860 --> 00:08:37,860
Murph, I think you ought to put that
thing away.
169
00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:40,440
Frank, nothing's going to happen to this
plane.
170
00:08:40,740 --> 00:08:41,740
I'm on it.
171
00:08:42,340 --> 00:08:44,800
Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your
attention for just a minute?
172
00:08:45,140 --> 00:08:46,400
We have a minor technical...
173
00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:49,920
It seems we've lost power in our number
one and two engines.
174
00:08:51,020 --> 00:08:54,860
Now, there's no cause for alarm. We can
land the plane safely as long as we have
175
00:08:54,860 --> 00:08:56,400
our number three and four engines.
176
00:08:58,820 --> 00:08:59,820
Uh -oh.
177
00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:01,000
Frank, what's going on?
178
00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:04,240
You always do this. You don't pay
attention, and then I have to repeat
179
00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:06,680
everything for you. We're crashing.
We're going down.
180
00:09:06,920 --> 00:09:08,840
No, that's not possible. It's not
possible.
181
00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,460
Do not panic.
182
00:09:10,740 --> 00:09:12,000
Do not panic.
183
00:09:12,580 --> 00:09:13,940
Everyone, take a pillow.
184
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,340
Place it on your lap.
185
00:09:17,700 --> 00:09:21,420
You might want to take this time to
review the safety cards in your seat
186
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:25,280
Where? What safety card? I didn't get
one. Someone took mine. The woman hates
187
00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:27,620
me. I don't have a safety card. She
didn't give me slipper socks.
188
00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:31,340
Okay, so last words, last words. I need
some good last words. Help me, ma 'am.
189
00:09:31,620 --> 00:09:32,920
I'll give you last words.
190
00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:37,380
This is Murphy Brown talking. If anyone
at the FAA is listening, I paid for
191
00:09:37,380 --> 00:09:41,440
first class. My seat back didn't
recline. I never got much injury. I make
192
00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:43,580
of bad ones once in a while. And another
thing.
193
00:09:44,330 --> 00:09:47,250
Mylon's public account president for the
full length of this trip. I don't care
194
00:09:47,250 --> 00:09:49,630
if we wind up splattered all over Father
John's weekday.
195
00:09:50,730 --> 00:09:51,730
Oh,
196
00:09:52,810 --> 00:09:54,370
what's the use? This is pointless.
197
00:09:54,570 --> 00:09:57,590
We're going down. These could be our
last minutes. I know. What do you do
198
00:09:57,590 --> 00:09:59,210
your last minutes? What do you think?
What do you say?
199
00:09:59,470 --> 00:10:02,770
Oh, I don't know. I can't believe I
didn't settle down. I don't have any
200
00:10:02,770 --> 00:10:03,770
don't even have a dog.
201
00:10:04,570 --> 00:10:05,570
Huh?
202
00:10:05,870 --> 00:10:06,870
Let's get married. What?
203
00:10:07,850 --> 00:10:10,750
We don't have much time left. We could
still do it just to know we did it.
204
00:10:10,970 --> 00:10:12,870
We don't even need a reverend. We can
marry ourselves.
205
00:10:14,079 --> 00:10:17,240
Murphy, do you take me, Frank, to be
your lawfully wedded husband?
206
00:10:17,460 --> 00:10:20,860
The sickness that it held for richer or
poorer? I'm not sure. What do you mean
207
00:10:20,860 --> 00:10:23,240
you're not sure? Plunging to our death.
What are you going to do? Wait for
208
00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:24,240
somebody better to come along?
209
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,660
Frank, I'm not thinking straight.
210
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,020
I can't believe it. I never made out a
will.
211
00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:30,640
Who's going to wind up with my shoes?
212
00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:32,120
Strangers.
213
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:33,960
Vicki. Hey, Vicki.
214
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,820
What, Frank? Vicki just didn't catch.
Where are all the exits?
215
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:38,820
Do you want to know where all the exits
are?
216
00:10:39,300 --> 00:10:40,300
Now?
217
00:10:46,090 --> 00:10:49,690
Oh, you just sat there, wondering when
the bar cart was coming out.
218
00:10:49,990 --> 00:10:55,050
Didn't you, Mr. World Traveler? Mr. I
-Know -It -All -My -Heart. And now you
219
00:10:55,050 --> 00:10:57,110
want me to tell you where all the exits
are?
220
00:10:57,370 --> 00:11:00,530
Well, I told you once, and I'm not going
to tell you again.
221
00:11:01,830 --> 00:11:03,090
I never liked her.
222
00:11:03,890 --> 00:11:05,710
Okay, listen up, people.
223
00:11:06,130 --> 00:11:10,150
Keep your seatbelts securely fastened.
I'll carry on baggage and be stowed
224
00:11:10,150 --> 00:11:11,150
the seats in front of you.
225
00:11:11,410 --> 00:11:15,450
Damn! What was the other one? I just had
it. Return your table and put your
226
00:11:15,450 --> 00:11:16,450
seatbelts...
227
00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:32,880
All right.
228
00:11:36,220 --> 00:11:37,220
Hold my hand.
229
00:12:08,290 --> 00:12:10,150
So what brings you to Washington?
230
00:12:10,510 --> 00:12:11,670
A job, maybe.
231
00:12:11,870 --> 00:12:13,470
I got an audition across the street.
232
00:12:13,730 --> 00:12:15,550
Murphy Brown audition, take one.
233
00:12:16,010 --> 00:12:20,290
Arvin Johns, executive producer of FYI.
Frank Fontana.
234
00:12:21,250 --> 00:12:22,250
Murphy Brown.
235
00:12:22,970 --> 00:12:27,810
So you're going up for one of these
spots on FYI, huh? Right. You too?
236
00:12:28,010 --> 00:12:31,230
Yeah. I tell you, I'm kind of looking
forward to it. I've never been on camera
237
00:12:31,230 --> 00:12:32,230
before. No kidding.
238
00:12:32,350 --> 00:12:33,329
What's your background?
239
00:12:33,330 --> 00:12:34,970
I'm a reporter for the New York Times.
240
00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:36,800
Frankie! Frankie!
241
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:38,860
Where do you think you're going?
242
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:40,520
I'm going out.
243
00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:42,560
And you don't say anything to anybody?
244
00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:45,680
You just walk out the door and let us
all think that you've been hit by a car
245
00:12:45,680 --> 00:12:47,540
and you're lying dead in the gutter
somewhere?
246
00:12:47,860 --> 00:12:49,200
I was just going out, that's all.
247
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:53,980
Frankie, I told you, no stickball. It's
a very dangerous game. I mean, you could
248
00:12:53,980 --> 00:12:55,940
get hit in the face. You could lose an
eye. Mom!
249
00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:59,880
Officer Stice, can you tell us anything
about the safety of the seven hostages?
250
00:13:00,060 --> 00:13:02,680
Well, they're okay, but the government
won't release anyone unless we can make
251
00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:04,920
statement to the media. I've got a clue.
I can go in. Now, wait a minute. You
252
00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:07,080
don't know what's going on here. Dan,
stay close. Let's go.
253
00:13:09,100 --> 00:13:10,100
Sullivan!
254
00:13:10,160 --> 00:13:11,460
We have a reporter going in.
255
00:13:12,980 --> 00:13:13,919
Where's your jacket?
256
00:13:13,920 --> 00:13:14,920
It's freezing outside.
257
00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:19,080
I spent good money on that jacket. You
don't even wear it. I can't wear it. The
258
00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:20,360
guys make fun of me. Why?
259
00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:24,400
You said you wanted a leather jacket. I
bought you a leather jacket. I said I
260
00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:29,120
wanted a black leather jacket with metal
studs and chains and zippers on the
261
00:13:29,120 --> 00:13:33,860
sleeves. You bought me a brown leather
jacket with buttons and fur on the
262
00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:34,860
collar. That's right.
263
00:13:35,220 --> 00:13:38,820
I didn't go through 12 hours of labor to
give birth to a son who dresses like a
264
00:13:38,820 --> 00:13:41,780
hoodlum. Frankie, I want you on me for
the street lamps. Come on.
265
00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:44,520
Frankie, you better stay away from that
subway.
266
00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:45,880
You hear me?
267
00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:49,500
Oh, my God.
268
00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:51,860
Oh. Oh, my God.
269
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:53,440
That Frankie?
270
00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:54,840
What's he doing?
271
00:13:56,300 --> 00:13:57,740
He's riding a bike.
272
00:13:58,320 --> 00:13:59,500
Is he insane?
273
00:14:16,380 --> 00:14:17,380
Daddy?
274
00:14:17,820 --> 00:14:19,100
I think that is me.
275
00:14:20,190 --> 00:14:21,190
Daddy, look at this.
276
00:14:22,230 --> 00:14:24,350
I got a B -plus on my report about
Khrushchev.
277
00:14:25,470 --> 00:14:26,470
B -plus.
278
00:14:28,630 --> 00:14:30,750
Should have been an A.
279
00:14:34,990 --> 00:14:36,790
Good, good, good.
280
00:15:11,340 --> 00:15:12,560
Frankie, what are you doing?
281
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:14,760
Nothing. Just riding.
282
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:17,240
You like me, don't you?
283
00:15:17,560 --> 00:15:18,780
Don't make me laugh.
284
00:15:19,860 --> 00:15:21,040
I'll bet you want to kiss me.
285
00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:22,660
I do not.
286
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:24,640
You know what?
287
00:15:24,660 --> 00:15:26,200
Your mother bought me a bra yesterday.
288
00:15:30,980 --> 00:15:32,560
Don't you want to kiss a woman?
289
00:15:40,780 --> 00:15:41,719
You know what this means?
290
00:15:41,720 --> 00:15:44,140
We're going study. I want to tell
everybody at school.
291
00:15:44,380 --> 00:15:47,380
Now you have to take me to the junior
dance on Saturday. My father can bribe
292
00:15:47,460 --> 00:15:48,860
Oh, and wear that brown leather jacket.
293
00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:50,220
I really love that.
294
00:15:50,860 --> 00:15:52,100
Hey, I gotta go.
295
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:55,060
Hey, where are you going? You better
call me, Frankie.
296
00:15:55,900 --> 00:15:56,900
Frankie!
297
00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:01,880
Wow,
298
00:16:06,380 --> 00:16:07,380
Murphy.
299
00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:08,520
You look beautiful.
300
00:16:09,240 --> 00:16:10,019
They look ridiculous.
301
00:16:10,020 --> 00:16:12,080
This dress is so stupid and everything
itches.
302
00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:15,300
Are those some nylon?
303
00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:18,260
Brian, why are you acting like some
space alien?
304
00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:22,960
Listen, why don't we just forget about
going to Lisa's birthday party and just
305
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:24,000
duck behind the garage and smoke?
306
00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:26,040
She could go through my dad's camels.
307
00:16:26,940 --> 00:16:28,700
I sort of want to go to the party.
308
00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:31,960
Lisa's parents took half of their
furniture out of the rubbish room so we
309
00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:34,220
dance. They have Johnny Mathis record.
310
00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:37,950
Marv. I could be at a baseball game with
my father right now.
311
00:16:38,410 --> 00:16:39,750
He was going to take me this time.
312
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:41,990
He always says he's going to. He never
does.
313
00:16:42,750 --> 00:16:44,250
But this time he was really going to
take me.
314
00:16:47,130 --> 00:16:48,130
What's in the box, Brian?
315
00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:51,850
This? Oh, it's something I was going to
give you later.
316
00:16:52,510 --> 00:16:53,510
Really? What is it?
317
00:16:54,070 --> 00:16:55,070
Here.
318
00:16:58,090 --> 00:16:59,090
A ring?
319
00:17:00,230 --> 00:17:02,010
What kind of ring is this? What does
this mean?
320
00:17:03,470 --> 00:17:04,490
It doesn't mean anything.
321
00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:06,640
Yeah, it does.
322
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:09,440
It's a friendship ring. It means we're
friends.
323
00:17:09,839 --> 00:17:11,180
No, special friends.
324
00:17:11,420 --> 00:17:12,420
That's all.
325
00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:15,800
And maybe in, say, 10 or 15 years, we'll
get married.
326
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,640
Married? Brian, how many times do I have
to tell you? I'm never getting married.
327
00:17:19,740 --> 00:17:22,720
I'm never having children. I'm never
picking up anybody's socks or cooking
328
00:17:22,720 --> 00:17:25,760
anybody's dinner or looking out the
window and waiting for somebody to come
329
00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:26,760
so I have someone to talk to.
330
00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:30,960
I guess I can accept that.
331
00:17:31,220 --> 00:17:34,000
But next time I kiss you, can I put my
tongue in your mouth?
332
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:36,240
Yeah, okay.
333
00:17:42,380 --> 00:17:49,040
I met Jake at the Democratic
334
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:50,280
Convention in 68.
335
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,440
We were married and it didn't last two
weekends.
336
00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:57,080
But it was the most exciting time of my
life.
337
00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:01,460
I just don't know who to talk to, Dad.
338
00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,320
I really like Teresa, but...
339
00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:05,560
I don't think I love her.
340
00:18:06,820 --> 00:18:08,160
What do you mean you don't love her?
341
00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,620
You're engaged to her. I know, but I
don't know how that happened. Everybody
342
00:18:11,620 --> 00:18:14,260
kept pushing me to do it. I'm 21 years
old, Dad.
343
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:18,120
You're a man, Frankie. It's time to
settle down and raise a family. That's
344
00:18:18,120 --> 00:18:20,340
you're supposed to do. That's what I
did. I'm not you.
345
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:25,160
All I know is I'm getting out of bed
every night in a cold sweat and throwing
346
00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:26,160
up.
347
00:18:26,460 --> 00:18:28,140
Oh, Frankie, Frankie.
348
00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:30,720
You just got a case of cold feet, that's
all.
349
00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:33,080
It's perfectly normal to throw up.
350
00:18:33,930 --> 00:18:36,210
I myself swore before I married your
mother.
351
00:18:36,790 --> 00:18:41,910
I have known you five minutes already. I
don't like you. I mean, it's very
352
00:18:41,910 --> 00:18:44,170
possible we could both land this job
today.
353
00:18:44,430 --> 00:18:46,030
We're both away from home.
354
00:18:46,290 --> 00:18:48,250
We've got no one to celebrate with.
355
00:18:48,590 --> 00:18:50,890
Maybe we could have celebrated together.
356
00:18:51,580 --> 00:18:53,480
Nice restaurant, bottle of champagne.
357
00:18:53,980 --> 00:18:54,980
Now it's ruined.
358
00:18:55,120 --> 00:18:58,580
You are trying to pick me up, aren't
you? Of course I'm trying to pick you
359
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:00,660
It's a spontaneous thing that guys do.
360
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,980
It's a primal urge, like how we invented
fire.
361
00:19:04,500 --> 00:19:06,300
Doesn't necessarily have to mean
anything.
362
00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:08,780
Don't waste your time, okay? Go try it
in a disco.
363
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:11,080
I've never been to a disco.
364
00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:15,960
Come on, you got Bee Gees written all
over you. I hate the Bee Gees. Admit it,
365
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:17,000
you took hustle lessons.
366
00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:20,400
And what do you listen to? Casey and the
Sunshine Band?
367
00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:28,840
a record made past 1968 oh yeah johnny's
in the basement mixing up the medicine
368
00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:32,740
i'm on the pavement thinking about the
government man in a trench coat badge
369
00:19:32,740 --> 00:19:36,500
laid off says he's got a bad cough wants
to get it paid off look out kid it's
370
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:43,400
something you did god knows when but
you're doing it again okay you pass
371
00:20:15,580 --> 00:20:17,000
Mer? Where are we?
372
00:20:17,580 --> 00:20:18,760
I have no idea.
373
00:20:20,900 --> 00:20:23,340
Oh, excuse me. Could you tell me what's
going on here?
374
00:20:24,360 --> 00:20:25,900
It must be in New York, Frank.
375
00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:29,660
Sir, whose funeral is this, sir?
376
00:20:30,780 --> 00:20:32,600
Geez, what a bunch of stiffs.
377
00:20:34,260 --> 00:20:36,780
Oh, here we go. This might tell us
something.
378
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:43,740
So long, Frank and Murphy.
379
00:20:45,889 --> 00:20:47,410
No. It can't be.
380
00:20:48,670 --> 00:20:49,670
Can it?
381
00:20:51,630 --> 00:20:52,630
Bobby! Hi!
382
00:20:52,790 --> 00:20:53,790
It's me, Murphy!
383
00:20:54,650 --> 00:20:55,810
Lynn! Hi, Lynn!
384
00:20:56,010 --> 00:20:57,010
Right in front of you, Lynn.
385
00:20:58,510 --> 00:20:59,930
Marv! Marv! Hands up, Marv!
386
00:21:00,390 --> 00:21:01,790
Marv! Right over here, Marv!
387
00:21:02,010 --> 00:21:03,010
Right over here!
388
00:21:07,030 --> 00:21:08,030
Frank?
389
00:21:08,450 --> 00:21:09,990
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
390
00:21:11,090 --> 00:21:13,110
Oh, come on. There's got to be some
explanation.
391
00:21:14,719 --> 00:21:15,719
There it is, Frank.
392
00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:19,320
We're dead.
393
00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:21,640
Oh, man.
394
00:21:25,940 --> 00:21:26,940
I love you.
395
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:32,680
We're dead and we're here at our own
funeral.
396
00:21:33,140 --> 00:21:37,060
Maybe it's just me, but I'm having a lot
of trouble accepting this. I think it's
397
00:21:37,060 --> 00:21:38,060
normal, Murph.
398
00:21:38,340 --> 00:21:40,760
You know, I don't see Barbara Walters
here.
399
00:21:42,120 --> 00:21:45,180
a real slap in the face. Isn't it not
showing up at my funeral?
400
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:48,360
She better have a real good excuse or
I'm going to haunt her.
401
00:21:49,300 --> 00:21:51,580
I bet I'd be really good at that.
402
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:54,720
You know, I don't see Koppel here
either.
403
00:21:54,980 --> 00:21:58,140
Or Donaldson. Or any of the guys from my
poker game.
404
00:21:58,580 --> 00:22:02,480
Sure, they come to my house, drink my
beer, throw up in my yard, but do they
405
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,160
want to pay their last respects? No.
406
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:08,060
I say we start making a list, Frank. We
should hit Donaldson's house tonight,
407
00:22:08,220 --> 00:22:11,400
walk around his attic, rattle some
chains, give him one of these.
408
00:22:12,100 --> 00:22:13,100
Get out!
409
00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:20,340
I don't know. So, what do you want to
do? Do you want to hang back here, or do
410
00:22:20,340 --> 00:22:21,820
you think we should mingle?
411
00:22:22,120 --> 00:22:24,520
Oh, let's mingle. It's the polite thing
to do.
412
00:22:26,060 --> 00:22:27,200
Such a tragedy.
413
00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:28,980
They were so young.
414
00:22:32,260 --> 00:22:33,260
Hey.
415
00:22:34,580 --> 00:22:37,620
Look, there's Alan Dunn, our videotape
editors.
416
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:39,520
Oh, poor guys.
417
00:22:40,190 --> 00:22:41,910
They were really attached to us.
418
00:22:42,190 --> 00:22:45,530
And can you believe how cold the bullets
were in that last quarter? They
419
00:22:45,530 --> 00:22:49,270
couldn't sink a lamp with a ladder. Are
you telling me? I had 50 bucks on the
420
00:22:49,270 --> 00:22:50,310
game. 50 bucks!
421
00:22:50,610 --> 00:22:53,970
I don't want to talk about that. It's
not what we're here for. Yeah.
422
00:22:54,870 --> 00:22:57,250
Hey, you ever get that transmission
problem solved?
423
00:22:58,570 --> 00:23:00,370
I'm just going to fix it good enough to
sell it.
424
00:23:00,570 --> 00:23:02,450
Let some other poor schmuck deal with
it.
425
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,760
Sometimes guys talk about cars to hide
their sorrow. Yeah, right.
426
00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:14,320
Don and Al, voices in the closet.
427
00:23:16,620 --> 00:23:19,000
When do you think this service is going
to start?
428
00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:21,920
I don't know. But maybe we should go
have a look at ourselves.
429
00:23:22,300 --> 00:23:23,300
What? Are you serious?
430
00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:27,260
Oh, come on, Frank. Aren't you just a
little bit curious? Come on. I want to
431
00:23:27,260 --> 00:23:30,600
if I look like I'm sleeping. This is
sick. This is really sick.
432
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:33,200
Wait a minute.
433
00:23:33,300 --> 00:23:34,300
What's this?
434
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:36,920
There's only one casket here.
435
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:42,060
That means that one of us is in that
vase.
436
00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:47,180
It's an urn, Frank. Urn, vase, what's
the difference? It's small, it's dark,
437
00:23:47,180 --> 00:23:48,180
I don't want to be in it.
438
00:23:48,780 --> 00:23:52,840
Go look in the casket. Maybe we're both
in there. Maybe that's what they thought
439
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:54,140
we'd like, being best friends and all.
440
00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:57,780
Come on, take a look.
441
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:04,960
Put it this way, Frank.
442
00:24:06,090 --> 00:24:07,150
I'm sleeping alone again.
443
00:24:09,150 --> 00:24:11,670
How did this happen? How did it happen?
444
00:24:12,050 --> 00:24:13,310
Yes, it's just awful.
445
00:24:13,770 --> 00:24:14,770
Really awful.
446
00:24:15,550 --> 00:24:20,310
They say if Frank had taken the time to
learn where the exits were... Don't
447
00:24:20,310 --> 00:24:24,350
blame this on me, Frank. I offered you
the aisle seat, but no, you wanted to
448
00:24:24,350 --> 00:24:25,350
near the window.
449
00:24:25,370 --> 00:24:28,830
Isn't it strange how they found Murphy's
hands around that stewardess's neck?
450
00:24:29,350 --> 00:24:31,750
You think you've got problems, Frank?
Look at me.
451
00:24:32,110 --> 00:24:33,210
That doesn't look like me.
452
00:24:33,450 --> 00:24:35,810
Oh, what are you complaining about? At
least you've got a face.
453
00:24:36,130 --> 00:24:38,210
It looks like Marilyn Quayle did my
hair.
454
00:24:38,430 --> 00:24:39,510
And those clothes.
455
00:24:39,990 --> 00:24:41,830
That jacket doesn't go with that skirt.
456
00:24:42,830 --> 00:24:45,510
And the shoes are all wrong. Who dressed
me?
457
00:24:46,070 --> 00:24:50,590
It was so difficult going through
Murphy's closet trying to decide what
458
00:24:50,590 --> 00:24:52,890
should wear for her very last public
appearance.
459
00:24:53,710 --> 00:24:55,730
I never really liked her sense of color.
460
00:24:55,950 --> 00:24:58,490
And she didn't seem to know how to hide
her flaws.
461
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:02,400
I think the peplum jacket and the dickie
work.
462
00:25:02,660 --> 00:25:06,140
What? I hate that dickie. I wouldn't be
caught dead in one.
463
00:25:06,380 --> 00:25:09,280
And now, look, dead in a dickie.
464
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:13,840
What do you think I'm wearing in there,
a smoking jacket?
465
00:25:15,820 --> 00:25:16,719
Take away.
466
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:17,579
Take away.
467
00:25:17,580 --> 00:25:19,780
Come on, watch your backs. Watch your
backs. Coming through.
468
00:25:20,020 --> 00:25:21,020
Now what?
469
00:25:22,660 --> 00:25:26,780
Excuse me, I just brought some things
from home I thought that she might want
470
00:25:26,780 --> 00:25:27,780
be buried with.
471
00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:29,220
Oh, that's very nice.
472
00:25:29,420 --> 00:25:30,420
of you, Eldon.
473
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:37,580
Like this thing.
474
00:25:38,900 --> 00:25:41,800
I caught her sleeping with it once, so
it must mean something.
475
00:25:45,380 --> 00:25:47,640
Bag of her favorite chocolate chip
cookies.
476
00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:50,520
A few extra pounds won't hurt her now.
477
00:25:59,470 --> 00:26:00,630
I don't know, in case you meet somebody.
478
00:26:08,530 --> 00:26:12,210
Oh, great. Nice outfit. A dickie and a
garter belt.
479
00:26:12,510 --> 00:26:14,730
I'm going to look great at the
orientation meeting.
480
00:26:16,410 --> 00:26:17,910
Whoa, what happened to this guy?
481
00:26:18,850 --> 00:26:19,809
I'm sorry.
482
00:26:19,810 --> 00:26:21,490
I didn't bring anything for you.
483
00:26:22,990 --> 00:26:25,130
All I got is this tic -tac.
484
00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:41,960
This is not going well at all. This is
not how I pictured my funeral.
485
00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:46,140
And I thought Mary Hart would show up.
She knows how I feel about her.
486
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:50,640
Okay, so she's married now, but I'm
dead. I have no hands. How much of a
487
00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:51,640
could I be?
488
00:26:51,940 --> 00:26:54,960
I know what you mean. I thought there'd
be more outpouring of emotion.
489
00:26:55,300 --> 00:26:59,900
You know, the beating of breasts, the
rending of garments, that kind of thing.
490
00:26:59,940 --> 00:27:01,120
This is very disappointing.
491
00:27:11,440 --> 00:27:12,540
We're done with grief.
492
00:27:13,620 --> 00:27:14,820
Poor thing.
493
00:27:15,500 --> 00:27:18,240
Look how he misses us. This is so
heartbreaking.
494
00:27:19,180 --> 00:27:20,180
Oh, Miles.
495
00:27:20,980 --> 00:27:23,140
Try to hold yourself together, okay?
496
00:27:23,620 --> 00:27:24,720
Can you do that?
497
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:26,660
Do you think you'll be all right?
498
00:27:27,060 --> 00:27:28,060
I don't know.
499
00:27:28,620 --> 00:27:30,800
I never thought something like this
could happen.
500
00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:33,460
The valet just sideswiped my car.
501
00:27:41,320 --> 00:27:46,720
any good if everyone will take their
seats please we can begin the service
502
00:27:46,720 --> 00:27:53,060
just go sit okay ladies and gentlemen i
503
00:27:53,060 --> 00:28:00,020
have been asked to lead this service
today a dark day as we bid farewell to
504
00:28:00,020 --> 00:28:04,860
our friends and colleagues murphy brown
and frank fontana
505
00:28:06,160 --> 00:28:10,320
We had actually asked Walter Cronkite to
lead the service, but he was unable to
506
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:11,320
reschedule a haircut.
507
00:28:13,020 --> 00:28:17,140
Don Hewitt, unfortunately, had tickets
to Phantom of the Opera, which he had
508
00:28:17,140 --> 00:28:18,400
paid for three months ago.
509
00:28:18,820 --> 00:28:23,060
And Willard Scott was in Orlando
celebrating the birthday of Mrs. Sylvia
510
00:28:23,060 --> 00:28:24,740
Clyman, who is 101 today.
511
00:28:27,420 --> 00:28:32,220
Before I begin the service, there are a
few telegrams I would like to read to
512
00:28:32,220 --> 00:28:34,420
you from Dan Rather.
513
00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:40,820
The world has lost a shining light, a
person of great courage and integrity.
514
00:28:41,580 --> 00:28:45,000
Never again shall we see the likes of,
insert dead person's name here.
515
00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:51,840
Here's one from Diane Sawyer.
516
00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:56,100
I thought I'd miss you, but I don't.
517
00:28:58,020 --> 00:28:59,560
I'm sure she meant that as a joke.
518
00:29:01,460 --> 00:29:03,540
Finally, this from Arlene Bartow.
519
00:29:03,950 --> 00:29:05,530
head of the network secretarial pool.
520
00:29:07,730 --> 00:29:09,150
Enough telegrams for now.
521
00:29:10,650 --> 00:29:17,090
You know, I had a very difficult time
deciding what to say here today.
522
00:29:17,610 --> 00:29:23,310
And that was because I knew Murphy and
Frank would never even want a funeral
523
00:29:23,310 --> 00:29:28,550
service. They would have been
uncomfortable having all these people
524
00:29:28,550 --> 00:29:30,910
giving long, melancholy speeches.
525
00:29:31,610 --> 00:29:34,190
They really hated that sort of thing.
What if it's our funeral? Come on!
526
00:29:34,410 --> 00:29:38,290
Murphy once told me she would never want
a show of emotion. Yes, I would!
527
00:29:38,590 --> 00:29:41,630
Which is why, in her honor, I will not
shed a tear.
528
00:29:41,970 --> 00:29:47,010
Cry, you son of a... Now, I know that
there are people here who would like to
529
00:29:47,010 --> 00:29:49,650
say a few words, so I'm going to throw
this open to the room.
530
00:29:50,710 --> 00:29:54,450
Just feel free to stand up and make some
remarks, if you wish.
531
00:30:02,830 --> 00:30:07,070
The last time I saw Murphy and Frank was
the day before yesterday.
532
00:30:08,310 --> 00:30:13,450
We were in a story meeting, and they
were giving me a hard time, like they
533
00:30:13,450 --> 00:30:14,450
usually do.
534
00:30:15,650 --> 00:30:18,290
But on that day, I just exploded at
them.
535
00:30:19,090 --> 00:30:20,970
I let them rearrange their flight plans.
536
00:30:21,790 --> 00:30:23,710
I told them I never wanted them to come
back.
537
00:30:41,260 --> 00:30:43,320
the rest of my days working through this
guilt.
538
00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:45,860
I'll never have a decent night's sleep.
539
00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:47,280
Ooh, ooh.
540
00:30:53,100 --> 00:30:54,360
I'll get another ulcer.
541
00:30:55,220 --> 00:30:56,900
I'll develop premature hair loss.
542
00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:01,280
Oh, I'll marry, but I'll alienate my
wife with tortured memories.
543
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:15,640
Kill myself.
544
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:20,740
I'd like to say something.
545
00:31:20,940 --> 00:31:22,120
Yes, go ahead, Phil.
546
00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:25,300
All right, finally. Somebody's going to
do justice to our memory.
547
00:31:27,660 --> 00:31:34,100
I just wanted to say that I
548
00:31:34,100 --> 00:31:37,000
really loved Murphy and Frank.
549
00:31:39,660 --> 00:31:43,580
And I hope that wherever they are,
550
00:31:44,910 --> 00:31:49,430
that they're happy and getting the big
scoop.
551
00:31:49,770 --> 00:31:51,250
We love you too, Phil.
552
00:31:52,650 --> 00:31:58,670
I also wanted to say I don't know if
this is the appropriate time,
553
00:31:58,830 --> 00:32:05,230
but Frank has an outstanding lunch tab
of $47 .22.
554
00:32:05,550 --> 00:32:08,430
Now, who would be taking care of that?
Would it be you, Miles?
555
00:32:10,210 --> 00:32:12,250
I'm sorry, Phil. That was a...
556
00:32:12,510 --> 00:32:14,250
Personal expense, and I can't approve
it.
557
00:32:16,190 --> 00:32:20,650
Well, somebody has to pay it. I mean, I
love the guy, but why should it come out
558
00:32:20,650 --> 00:32:24,690
of my pocket? Phil, Phil, maybe we
should settle this later.
559
00:32:24,910 --> 00:32:25,910
Oh, sure.
560
00:32:25,970 --> 00:32:29,010
You'll run around. I can see the
handwriting on the wall.
561
00:32:29,210 --> 00:32:31,030
Please, Phil, take your seat.
562
00:32:38,850 --> 00:32:41,190
No, before I conclude this service...
563
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:49,140
that anyone would like to say?
564
00:32:51,460 --> 00:32:52,460
Yes.
565
00:32:52,740 --> 00:32:57,060
Now that they're gone, does that mean
that there are job openings? I'm the 11
566
00:32:57,060 --> 00:33:00,040
'clock anchor from the affiliate in
Denver, and I brought a tape with me.
567
00:33:37,450 --> 00:33:39,090
I've never played that good before.
568
00:33:41,650 --> 00:33:42,650
It's over, Frank.
569
00:33:44,530 --> 00:33:45,530
I know.
570
00:33:46,550 --> 00:33:48,530
You know, I swore I'd never do this.
571
00:33:48,730 --> 00:33:52,910
I swore that when my time came, I'd
never look back with regrets, but I
572
00:33:52,910 --> 00:33:53,789
help it.
573
00:33:53,790 --> 00:33:56,070
There are so many things I didn't get to
do.
574
00:33:56,630 --> 00:34:00,390
I learned to speak Italian, read Moby
Dick again.
575
00:34:01,260 --> 00:34:04,780
Clean out my hall closet. Oh, God,
people are going to open that thing and
576
00:34:04,780 --> 00:34:06,100
that video of love story.
577
00:34:07,420 --> 00:34:10,840
Strange, isn't it? You always think you
have all the time in the world.
578
00:34:11,540 --> 00:34:12,540
Someday, right.
579
00:34:15,460 --> 00:34:18,620
I used to talk to the married guys on
the road.
580
00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:24,480
I used to love to complain about the
wife and kids, because that's what
581
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:29,199
supposed to do when you're a reporter in
some hotel bar in Panama or Tehran or
582
00:34:29,199 --> 00:34:30,199
Detroit.
583
00:34:31,850 --> 00:34:32,989
They said they envied me.
584
00:34:33,590 --> 00:34:40,210
Then they'd all go home to their
families and have dinners together and
585
00:34:40,210 --> 00:34:44,190
go to PTA meetings and wash the dog in
the yard.
586
00:34:45,469 --> 00:34:49,429
And I always thought, well, someday.
587
00:34:52,350 --> 00:34:53,850
I work too hard.
588
00:34:54,310 --> 00:34:55,670
Why did I do that?
589
00:34:56,350 --> 00:34:58,570
Why couldn't I just learn to putter?
590
00:34:59,310 --> 00:35:02,730
You know, just putter around the house
like other people seem to do. I never
591
00:35:02,730 --> 00:35:04,030
could get the hang of that.
592
00:35:04,250 --> 00:35:07,950
Oh, we wanted to leave our indelible
mark. We wanted to go down in history.
593
00:35:08,450 --> 00:35:10,670
Now look, our funeral's over.
594
00:35:10,970 --> 00:35:12,730
People are at Phil's having a beer.
595
00:35:13,590 --> 00:35:15,650
Tomorrow morning, the sun will come up.
596
00:35:16,090 --> 00:35:17,210
People will go to work.
597
00:35:18,050 --> 00:35:20,310
Life will go on just fine without us.
598
00:35:20,510 --> 00:35:23,290
Now wait a minute, Murph. We weren't
like everybody else.
599
00:35:24,010 --> 00:35:25,870
We were different. We were special.
600
00:36:05,550 --> 00:36:06,790
trying to tell us something.
601
00:36:07,750 --> 00:36:09,750
Life is a blip on a radar screen.
602
00:36:10,210 --> 00:36:13,770
You know, you are a real downer. Are you
going to be like this for the rest of
603
00:36:13,770 --> 00:36:16,450
eternity? Because if you are, I'm going
to have to find somebody else to hang
604
00:36:16,450 --> 00:36:17,450
out with.
605
00:36:17,530 --> 00:36:22,610
All I'm saying is, is that if I had it
to do over again, maybe I would have
606
00:36:22,610 --> 00:36:24,310
gotten off my high horse a little bit.
607
00:36:25,030 --> 00:36:27,830
Maybe I wouldn't have bulldozed my way
through everything.
608
00:36:29,100 --> 00:36:32,520
Maybe I wouldn't have let the air out of
Spiro Agnew's tires.
609
00:36:33,340 --> 00:36:35,040
Man, I still would have done that.
610
00:36:37,920 --> 00:36:39,780
No point in talking about it now.
611
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:42,760
Can't go back and rewrite history.
612
00:36:44,620 --> 00:36:46,400
Come on, let's get out of here.
613
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:48,600
Good idea, Frank.
614
00:36:49,140 --> 00:36:51,660
And where exactly are we supposed to go?
615
00:36:52,060 --> 00:36:54,080
Well, I don't know. I've never been dead
before.
616
00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:58,860
Maybe they've got some... Kind of check
-in counter or something.
617
00:37:10,700 --> 00:37:13,100
Frank, can I tell you something?
618
00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:16,340
I'm really glad we're pals.
619
00:37:18,700 --> 00:37:20,400
You're the best friend I've ever had.
620
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:29,320
or something? Shh. I think it's the
engine.
621
00:37:32,060 --> 00:37:33,500
I think we're leveling off.
622
00:37:33,740 --> 00:37:35,500
Oh, please, please, oh, please.
623
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:39,700
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm pleased to
tell you that we've regained engine
624
00:37:41,360 --> 00:37:45,300
I'll be radioing ahead to Chicago to
clear us for a priority landing.
625
00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:48,900
We'll get you folks onto another plane
and you'll be on your way.
626
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:52,760
I hope this little incident won't keep
you from flying our airline again.
627
00:37:53,940 --> 00:37:55,700
There'll be no charge for the headsets.
628
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:02,300
Tell me about it.
629
00:38:04,060 --> 00:38:09,520
I would have to say that that is the
closest I have ever come.
630
00:38:10,180 --> 00:38:11,180
Me too.
631
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:18,880
Say, Frank, what were you thinking about
a few nights ago?
632
00:38:23,060 --> 00:38:24,060
Nothing.
633
00:38:26,260 --> 00:38:27,980
How about you?
634
00:38:37,250 --> 00:38:39,350
Actually, I was thinking about
something.
635
00:38:41,250 --> 00:38:43,730
I was thinking that I should take my dad
fishing.
636
00:38:45,610 --> 00:38:47,150
Funny what pops into your head.
637
00:38:48,310 --> 00:38:49,310
Yeah.
638
00:38:51,310 --> 00:38:53,230
How long do you think it would take to
learn Italian?
639
00:38:55,010 --> 00:38:57,990
For you, three, maybe four hours.
640
00:39:00,030 --> 00:39:03,610
Frank, I really owe you an apology.
641
00:39:04,940 --> 00:39:10,520
I don't usually yell at the passengers,
but we appear to be crashing, and all of
642
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:14,440
a sudden I looked at you, and I saw the
kind of guy who stands up in the aisle
643
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:17,520
to take his things out of the overhead
compartment before the plane has come to
644
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:20,300
a full and complete stop. That really
ticks me off.
645
00:39:21,220 --> 00:39:22,540
But I'm okay now.
646
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:24,640
I'm sorry.
647
00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:27,500
Oh, don't worry about it. It's
forgotten.
648
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:29,640
Thanks.
649
00:39:31,060 --> 00:39:32,060
Hey, Vicki?
650
00:39:33,580 --> 00:39:36,980
The next time you're in Washington,
would it be okay if I took you to
651
00:39:38,200 --> 00:39:39,200
I'd like that.
652
00:39:40,700 --> 00:39:41,700
One other thing.
653
00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:46,560
How do you feel about marriage, kids,
and dogs?
654
00:39:48,940 --> 00:39:50,840
I'm not ready. I'm not ready.
655
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:52,280
And I'm allergic.
656
00:40:03,530 --> 00:40:05,030
Some piece of work, Frank.
657
00:40:05,350 --> 00:40:06,350
I know.
658
00:40:08,190 --> 00:40:12,130
So, Frank, what do you say we fritter
away some time? I got a deck of cards
659
00:40:12,130 --> 00:40:13,130
here. You're on.
660
00:40:14,110 --> 00:40:17,710
Although, we're going to be landing in a
few minutes. Maybe I should finish
661
00:40:17,710 --> 00:40:18,790
those interview questions.
662
00:40:21,630 --> 00:40:22,630
Nah.
663
00:40:23,350 --> 00:40:24,350
Let's fritter.
664
00:40:33,960 --> 00:40:37,860
They're actually two families, but
they're really one big happy family.
665
00:40:39,700 --> 00:40:41,940
Most of the time.
666
00:40:42,280 --> 00:40:45,680
Watch Who's the Boss every night on Nick
at Night.
55252
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