All language subtitles for yes_dear_s02e15_walk_like_a_man

And it's really coming down out there.

Guess I won't be mowing the lawn today.

Yeah.

Guess I won't be cleaning out the
gutters either.

Man, you can't do anything on a day like
this.

That makes you want to move to Seattle.

We could put those new handles on the
kitchen cabinets like the women asked us

to. Yeah, but, you know, with all the
moisture in the air, the wood gets kind

soft, and it's really difficult to get a
screw to hold.

How'd that sound?

I think they'll buy it.

Oh, it's okay, Sam.

Hey.

Don't be scared, okay?

That's what happens when the angels are
bowling and one of them gets a strike.

Okay? Hey, but the good news is, when
that happens, every little boy gets a

cookie. All right?

So go tell Dominic to get you one. And
get one for your Uncle Jimmy, too, okay?

I can't believe that. Well, that's not
really true about the angels, Greg.

I mean, I could tell him what really
makes thunder, but I'd have to look it

I'm not talking about that. I'm talking
about the way Sammy just ran past me to

you. He was scared.

Exactly. I'm his father. Why'd he run
into you?

I don't know. He was running pretty
fast. Maybe he was just looking for a

spot to land.

Come on, if he runs into you, he could
chip a tooth on one of your hip bones.

Tim, you won't believe what Sam just
did.

I'm hoping he changed the cabinet
handles and someone has clearly stapled

ass to the couch.

Sammy came running in here, afraid from
the thunder, and he runs right to Jimmy.

Oh, no. Where is he? Is he still upset?

No, he's not upset.

He's fine. I'm the one that's upset.

Oh, that's right. I forgot you were
afraid of thunder.

I'm not afraid of thunder.

During the day.

It's sad because Sam goes to Jimmy for
comfort instead of me. Oh, come on. It's

not that big of a deal. Maybe Jimmy was
just closer.

Jimmy was over there. I'm standing right
here, Kim.

You ought to see, Sam ran in and dodged
me like I was a piece of broccoli and

Jimmy was made of chocolate.

Look, Greg, I mean, to be fair, I mean,
my body is probably five to ten percent

chocolate.

I mean, the rest is pretty much...

Water.

Nougat.

Maybe he just didn't see you. Your shirt
kind of blends in with the couch.

Oh, please.

The kid can spot a Cheerio under the
fridge 20 feet away. I think he can

definitely see his dad on the couch.

Greg, I think you're overreacting. He's
a little kid. He doesn't know what

he's...

Don't even.

Man, there are some really good movies
out.

Hey, do you think the kids are old
enough to go to the movies?

I don't know. I guess they could
probably sit through it, but how would

there? Like a bus or something?

I'm serious.

We should take them. Sammy's never been.

What do you think, Greg? Is Sammy ready
for his first movie? I guess. Just make

sure Jimmy goes with him in case he gets
scared.

Well, you know, make sure that Greg
comes along, too, so he can, I don't

pay.

You just love this, don't you, being the
big protector of the house. Hey, well,

look at it this way, okay? If anything
happens to me, you'll be the big

protector of the house.

Of course, you'll probably have to
wrestle Christine for it.

And you don't want none of this.

I just can't believe he ran to you
instead of me. I'm his father. I mean,

should feel safe around me.

Kim, when you were growing up, you felt
safe around your father, didn't you?

Well, yeah, but that's because I was so
scared of him, I figured everything else

was, too.

He's always stomping around the house,
grunting and yelling.

And when you're a little kid, you're not
afraid of monsters in your closet when

you got one chasing you down the
hallway, screaming at you for changing

thermostat.

I'm not going to start yelling at my son
just to make him feel safe around me.

I'm proud of the fact that I don't do
stuff like that.

I'm a reasonable, sensitive father.

And that's great, okay, but sometimes
you've got to be an authority figure

okay? You need to do things to show
Sammy that you're the man of the house.

Oh, oh, honey, you spilled on yourself.
Let me get that out before it stains.

Oh, thanks.

Oh, honey, take it easy. I don't want to
trade a stain for a bruise.

If you could just eat without spilling
everything all over. Okay, all right,

Pete, this is what I'm talking about.

All right, if I'm Sammy and I'm watching
this, I don't see you as my father. I

see you as my sloppy older brother.

Sammy does not see Greg as his older
brother.

I don't know, Kim. Think about it. He
only knows what he sees.

Okay, Sammy.

So the baby cub went walking through the
forest looking for Father Bear.

See?

There are my two favorite boys.

You know what time it is, don't you?

It's time for the devil monster.

Gotcha. Oh, gotcha. I know. Mommy's
gotcha.

I wonder who's next.

I don't know.

I know.

think this is gonna come out stop it
stop cleaning me i'm not your baby cub

the father bear sam did you hear that
i'm the father bear jimmy's right

i need to start showing sammy that i'm
the man of the house that means that i

can't have you treating me like a little
kid kim fine am i allowed to bring you

your fruit salad or would you rather go
out and kill it yourself i am the man of

the house you may bring me my fruit
salad

No, no, no, that's Sammy. I took the
strawberries out of yours.

Daddy's allergic to strawberries just
like you're allergic to peanuts.

Would you stop comparing me to Sam?
We're different. We're completely

He's a little boy. I'm a full -grown
man.

Greg, Kim can stop treating you like a
kid, but it's up to you to make him see

you as a man.

You're right.

You're right.

What should I do?

What would Fred McMurray do?

If I could smoke a pipe.

Please, you need your inhaler. It's a
barbecue chicken.

You just need to let him see you doing
manly things. Like what?

Oh, no.

Why don't you... Hey, why don't you come
play touch football with me and the

guys tomorrow, okay? That way he'll see
you, you know, throw a few blocks, catch

a few passes, problem solved.

Yeah, that might be a good idea. You
know, back in the day, I was the man on

field hockey team.

Isn't field hockey a woman's sport?

Yeah, that's what I meant. I was the man
on the team.

Boys, what's up? Hey, Jimmy. Hey, Bill.
Hey, Greg, what are you doing here? Did

you come to be a cheerleader?

No, I didn't come to be a cheerleader. I
came to play football. Just because I'm

a small guy doesn't mean I don't like
sports.

Hey, relax.

I didn't know you were so touchy about
it. I mean, Jimmy told us you went to

college on a cheerleading scholarship.

What? Sorry, it's just sometimes when
we're drinking, everybody has funny

stories to tell, so I make stuff up.

Hey, Dot, what's up, man? This is my
brother -in -law, Greg. Hey, nice to

you.

Billy, toss me the ball.

Hey, you didn't tell me we were playing
with girls. How am I supposed to look

like a man when I'm playing against a
girl?

We have to invite her.

Oscar's in love with her, and that's the
only way he gets to touch her.

Cut it out.

We're not even playing yet.

Let's play! Hold on, I just need a
second.

All right, Sammy, Daddy's going to play
football now because Daddy's a man, just

like all those other men out there.

Yeah, except for that tiny woman who's
probably going to be covering you.

She's not going to be covering me.
They're probably going to get a big guy

cover me.

And for some crazy reason, she is
covering me. She's not a regular woman.

She's a tough woman.

Hey, guys, look, this is Greg's first
time here, so just go easy on him, all

right? All right, guys. All right, look,
do this for me, and I will buy beers

after the game, okay? Wait a second.

Beers for us or beers for you?

Fine. Beers for you. All right.

Okay, guys, I'm ready. Okay, you guys
get the football first.

Hey, make sure Sammy's watching, Kim.

52! 43!

Get your hands out of there. I'm not
even the center.

Oops. Sorry.

52!

43!

99! 73!

Sammy, did you see Daddy?

Kim, did Sammy see me? I just scored a
touchdown.

Oh, no, he just did the cutest little
dance.

Well, did you at least get it on tape?

Yeah, yeah, you can watch it later at
home. He was so cute. No, Kim, my

touchdown.

Oh, no, I didn't get that.

Here, here, go do it again. Do it again.

Take it easy on him. What, are you
kidding me?

Fine.

Let's play some football.

Good hustle.

I know what you're doing.

Make sure Sammy's watching.

Okay, I won't let him look away.

Okay, Sammy, what Daddy's going to do
right now is call rushing the

What I'm going to do is... I'm okay.

It's okay.

Keep watching, Sammy.

Daddy's about to bring the pain.

Hi, Sammy.

How you doing, buddy?

Daddy's just resting.

Oh!

Hey, you all right?

Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.

I'm getting up, I'm getting up. Ah, no
hurry. Billy kicked a ball up into a

and it got stuck. No one wants to climb
up there and get it.

I'll get it. What?

I'll climb up to the tree and get it. Do
you hear that, Sammy? You hear that,

Sammy? Your daddy's going to climb the
tree everyone else is too scared to. No

one said we're scared to. We just don't
think it's worth climbing all the way to

the top of a tree for a $10 football.

Okay. You hear that, Sam?

They're rationalizing. They're all
scared. Your daddy's the only one brave

enough to do it.

Sammy, you watching?

You watching?

Wow, look at him go. He's like a
squirrel.

Oh, yeah.

He's a good climber.

Yeah, he probably had a lot of practice
when he was climbing to the top of them

human pyramids when he was a
cheerleader.

Watch your daddy, Sammy.

Yes, I got it.

Here comes your hero.

Firemen seem nice. Oh, yeah. Really
nice.

Good guys.

Dominic really liked the fire truck.

Yeah. Shiny.

Sammy really enjoyed it. Yeah, yeah,
yeah. And the sky is blue. And how about

those Dodgers? And, oh, hey, I'm a big
wuss for getting stuck in a tree.

want to chit -chat about that?

Craig, stop it. One of the firemen said
it happens all the time.

Two pussycats, Kim. He said...

I never heard him say the word cats.

It's not a big deal.

I love who you are.

You're responsible, you're trustworthy,
and you always put safety first.

Great, I'm a Girl Scout. Want to buy
some Thin Mint?

Hey, Kim, if we're going to take all the
kids to the movies, we better start

getting them ready. Plus, I've got to
get snacks and fill the thermos with

orange juice.

Well, I'll just bring some juice boxes.

How the hell am I going to get vodka in
a juice box?

Greg, it's not a big deal. Stop beating
yourself up.

Why not? I'm so weak, it doesn't even
hurt when I do it.

Look, Greg, it's not your fault that you
are who you are, man. You didn't have

the benefit of being raised by a tough
man.

But that wasn't my dad's fault. His
father was like that, too.

I think your family has a wuss gene.

What? A wuss gene. It's been passed down
from generation to generation.

Well, you're probably right.

I bet you way back when there was a
Wussy Warner caveman.

All the other cavemen were dragging
women back home by their hair.

I bet your mind was trying to impress
one with his fossil collection.

Listen, if I were you, you know, I'd do
something about it before it spreads to

Sammy. I think Sammy's a little young to
start worrying about that. Oh, really?

You've already passed some of it along.

I have not.

Please, I could take out your whole
family with a strawberry and a peanut.

Face it, man.

It's up to you to break the chain.

Well, I'm working against thousands of
years of evolution here. I mean, how am

supposed to break that chain? I don't
know. It's a wood chain. How strong can

be?

You

know,

I thought this was going to be boring,
but you know what? I'm actually having a

really good time.

I mean, look at all these cute kids.

They're just all so cute.

Just be like, cute.

How much of that thermos have you had?

Oh, they wouldn't let me bring that in.
I had to try to get the parking lot.

Hi, cutie.

Just sit that sweet piece of Jimmy right
down here next to mamacita.

Hey.

Thermos kicking in? Yeah.

what it was like when we used to go to
the movies when we were kids.

It's all coming back.

Hey, what should we do for dinner after
this?

I'm thinking soup.

The place next door, they got some great
soup.

You should have seen what Bob brought
into the office today.

His dog.

You believe that?

What kind of a jerk?

Brings his dog into the office.

I

thought

for sure he was going to get axed.

You know, it reminds me, Bob and his
wife want to get together next week.

I told him Saturday was all right.
Excuse me, would you please not talk

the movie?

Sure don't.

You know, the problem with having those
guys over for dinner is that Bob's wife

chews her food so loud it drives me
absolutely nuts.

I'm going to say something.

No, I'll handle this.

And she bites her fork.

It's like she's sharpening her teeth or
something.

Hey,

sit down, buddy. My wife can't see.

Oh, yeah, well, my kid can't hear.

I said sit down.

You shut up and maybe I'll sit down.

Way to go, buddy.

Greg, what are you doing?

Breaking the chain, Kim. Breaking the
chain.

Ah, Greg, why don't you take a seat? I
think you proved your point. Jimmy, it

stops here.

I'm breaking the chain.

Well, if you don't sit down, I think...

He's going to break your chain.

How about this?

How about you sit down? I'll be quiet.

We talk about this in the lobby after
the movie.

Fine with me.

All right, come on. I don't see him
anywhere.

Okay, Sammy.

Your daddy's not hiding.

He's just walking with the posse.

I don't see him. Maybe he chickened out.

I doubt.

Yeah, maybe.

What if he's waiting for me outside?

Okay, we'll go get the car. If he's in
the parking lot, we'll pull around the

front and you can jump in. Christine.

You know, honey, I know this is going to
sound a little strange with you hiding

behind me, but, um...

I'm really proud of the way you handled
this.

There you are.

Frank.

Frank, you're hurting my shoulder.

Look, can we just talk about this maybe
like... Can we get a manager over here?

It's okay, buddy.

It's okay.

I just didn't want you to eat that.
You're allergic to peanuts, remember?

These can make you really, really sick.

Is he okay?

Yeah, I got to him before he put it in
his mouth.

I can't believe you punched that guy.

Well, Kim, I had to.

Yeah, I know, but it was like you didn't
even think about it. Well?

Tammy's life was in danger and you
sprang into action.

You're a hero.

Yeah.

Yeah, well.

I guess I kind of am.

You want to know something? It felt
good.

It felt damn good.

I don't care who you are, you know, man
or peanut. You've messed with a member

of the Warner family.

You're either going to get thunder or
you're going to get lightning. And

you me, you don't want to get caught up
in this rain.

Greg, he's starting to get up.

Okay, run.

Come on, Timmy. Run like Daddy.

Poor dad.

He's such a wuss.

I wish there was something I could do to
make him feel better.

Hey, I could pick up that peanut candy
bar and act like I'm going to eat it.

Hello? Hello? I'm holding a lethal
weapon here. Hello?

There you go.

There you go.

Now you can feel like a man, you big
dummy.

Uh -oh.

The big guy is getting up.

Excuse me, excuse me.