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Here I am.
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Well, happy G .I .s and play. Where's
the action?
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Hey, Bilko. Somebody call me?
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You're the baseball expert around here.
Well?
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I bet you can't answer this question.
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I'll answer any question on baseball.
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Well, here's five bucks says you can't
answer this one. Well, sir, I'll just
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cover that.
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Five more?
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Glad to do business with you, Andy.
Don't forget me. I'll never forget you.
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All right?
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What's the question?
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How's that go again?
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Oh, yeah, I got it.
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Bases are loaded.
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None out.
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Then there's three clean singles in a
row and not a man scores.
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How?
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Bases are loaded.
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Yeah. None out.
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Yeah. Three clean singles in a row.
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Yeah. And not a man scores.
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Yeah. It was a girl's baseball team.
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Yeah.
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my little pool, dollar a ball?
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Oh, come on, fellas. Let's have some
action around here. This joint is dying
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its feet. Come on, let's look alive.
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Look, I'm just nutty enough to bet on
anything today. Anything.
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I'll bet you anything you want.
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The next man who walks in here is
barefooted.
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Barefooted? Anything you want.
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I'm tired.
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I didn't make the bet. What are you
worth?
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Hey,
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take a look at him. He was ready to bet.
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So, Wicky, you got any more baseball
questions?
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You just wait, you guys. Bilko will get
his. Oh, he's already got his.
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And he's got yours, too.
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Hey, get a load of this.
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We got a new drill sergeant just
transferred from Camp Hanley. Master
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Quentin Q. Benton.
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Quentin Q. Benton? Maybe it's a whack.
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Hey, that's a sixth drill sergeant this
year.
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Quentin Q. Benton? He won't stay here
long enough to pronounce his name.
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Quentin Q. Benton. Can you see him
trying to get Bilko to parade?
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Imitation. This is Sergeant Quentin Q.
Benton. Sergeant Bilko, parade.
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Quentin Q. Benton.
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Hi,
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welcome to Fort... What do you think,
Beast?
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A chicken outfit.
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You men hear that?
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Sergeant Benton thinks this is a chicken
outfit.
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Any questions?
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Yeah, I got a question.
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I'll handle this.
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You're not kicking anybody around. Come
on, put them on. Hey, what are you
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trying to pull at?
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Hello, you meatballs.
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I'm Corporal Krim, the sergeant's
special secretary.
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I'll handle all the little fundraising
like dancers and raffles that the
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sergeant thinks up. But Sergeant Belko
handles things like that around here.
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Belko?
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Bilko! Where are they? Well, I hear
there's some new men on the postage. Oh,
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there they are. Well, welcome to Fort
Banks. Now you men will want some gifts
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send home.
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You're very lucky. I just got the...
Home and mother pillows.
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Chalk -filled pine needles. And rock
-bottom prices, too. I didn't introduce
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myself. I'm Sergeant Bilko. You can call
me Ernie.
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Your friend is a little robust. Well,
sir, now that we've learned to trust
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other, you might be interested in the
only genuine Fort Baxter stationery. If
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you'll notice, it's beautifully
monogrammed, and it's only $2 a box.
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Nice. I'll take one. Here's a quarter.
All right. Put... Quarter?
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You don't understand. They're worth at
least $5 a box.
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They are? Here, they're yours for $5.
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Well, I'm a little overstocked with them
right now. That's all right. I trust
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you. Handshake?
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I'd rather pay cash.
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I hate to have little debts hanging over
my head. Well, there's a lesson for you
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boys. Buy and sell. It's the very
lifeblood of the business world.
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What is it? Does he want to be fed?
What? He wants to play pool.
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00:04:20,399 --> 00:04:23,620
Well, I'd be glad to accommodate you,
but I must admit I don't know too much
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about the game.
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Ten dollars. Eight balls, side pocket.
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I'll just cover that bet.
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Too bad it missed.
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Now, you don't seem to understand. I win
that bet.
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You see, you bet that the eight ball
would go into the side pocket, but it
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didn't go in. I said eight ball, side
pocket. I didn't say it was going to go
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in.
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00:04:47,490 --> 00:04:50,930
Now, you see how he didn't say it was
going to go in, and I thought it was
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to go in?
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And what do we learn from this man? We
learn to listen and learn and be alert.
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All is not what it seems. Listen.
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What is it? Does he want some meat?
Quiet.
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Quiet, man.
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00:05:03,150 --> 00:05:06,430
The beast wants to talk. Quiet. He's
going to say a few words. Shut up.
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00:05:08,180 --> 00:05:11,000
Now, here it is. I'm going to say this
just once.
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Here's what I don't like.
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I don't like bald -headed guys with big
mouths who wear glasses.
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An honest opinion. I don't say I agree
with him, but I'll defend with my life
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his right.
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Here's what I like.
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Here's what he likes. Make notes, men.
This is what he likes. I like being a
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drill sergeant.
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I like to drill guys until their tongues
hang out.
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I like to see them crawling through the
mud. I like to see them getting their
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faces scratched and sleeping all night
out in the rain.
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Funny, but that's the way I am.
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That's the way he is. Some men like
women, he likes fellas scratched up.
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I'll see you at drill.
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Crumbs. I've had enough. Let me...
Paparelli, I'm surprised at you.
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Resorting to force.
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Sarge, he's a brute.
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Sarge, what are we going to do? Do what?
What do we have to do? What?
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Sarge, are you afraid of him?
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I'm going to pretend I didn't hear you
say that.
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Afraid of him, indeed.
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Because I show a little perceptiveness,
does that mean I'm afraid because I'm
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tolerant? Because I'm trying to see
things from his point of view?
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Now, gentlemen, let's review this. A man
walks in here, obviously antagonistic.
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He talks too loud. He bangs or squeezes
too hard.
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To me, an obvious display of massive
inferiority complex.
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And it manifests itself in the Freudian
theory of inner regret.
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Now, I'm sure you know what I'm talking
about, Pat Bradley, because you don't.
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You don't know about the debate?
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Oh, this all came out in a debate that
Freud had with Spinoza many years ago in
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Budapest. You read this. You didn't...
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Tremendous! Tremendous!
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Freud came out with the Bernhardt theory
that man and the inner man, when there
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is an obvious submersion of the libido
into the id section, you will find a
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regression.
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Freud definitely points out that in the
alter ego, when there is an Oedipus
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00:07:05,080 --> 00:07:09,200
complex which is prevalent, you will see
that the man who shows sadistic
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tendencies, aggression will also
submerge into the cocoon of being
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from the entire soul.
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Freud in his search for knowledge. Oh,
this is way before the search for Bridie
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Murphy. He had the... He knew this. He
knew that the it complex will manifest
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itself with an outburst of bedroom of
guilt. And there you have the libido
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intertwined with the it complex.
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Intertwined with the heterogeneous
sections A. Heterogeneous sections B.
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came... Oh, Spinoza denied this. Oh, he
screamed.
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Didn't do him any good. Because there's
a theory brought right out here. We have
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a man showing in a rejection in this
very room a few moments ago. He walked
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with this massive aggressiveness.
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It looks on the surface he's sadistic,
but it isn't that at all. It's just his
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desire saying, I'm not so big.
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I am little.
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That's what he's saying. He wants to be
loved.
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He shows it, but he hides it. That's his
whole quest.
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He wants to be loved. It's his way of
saying, love me.
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How can we get rid of the creeper?
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Now, this is Sergeant Benton's bunk. The
torture chamber.
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You got the rocks in the right place?
Yeah. Good.
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Now, is this the hardest mattress you
could get? Hey, Sarge, do I have to
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under here? Of course. You're the
loudest snore in the whole platoon. We
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00:08:33,490 --> 00:08:34,990
you. We need that snorius. And look.
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Every hour, on the hour, you have a
nightmare. You scream, you kick, you
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Right? Okay.
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And when it comes to me complaining,
I'll try to be reasonable. I'll say,
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Sergeant Benton, these are army
regulations.
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It's the only bunk open. If my hands are
tied, I'll say them. Of course,
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Sergeant Benton, I'll say, if you wish
to be transferred.
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Here he comes, Sarge. All right, boys,
look alive. We have a guest.
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Well, Sergeant Benton, this is your
bunk. Hey, Sarge, look.
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00:08:59,480 --> 00:09:00,580
An honest mistake.
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00:09:02,670 --> 00:09:07,030
I would like to point out, sir, that
I... Those are my clothes, of course. I
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00:09:07,030 --> 00:09:11,890
feel that it is my fault that you got
this place on the bunk. I feel that in
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00:09:11,890 --> 00:09:16,230
army regulations... Yes, of course. I
feel that if you feel that you're not
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00:09:16,230 --> 00:09:20,270
comfortable enough, well, it is my fault
army regulations say that the first
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00:09:20,270 --> 00:09:24,140
bunk open a man gets. Now, I would
rather you have what you want, but... As
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00:09:24,140 --> 00:09:27,900
can see, my hands are tied. I want you
to be just where you feel that you
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00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:32,900
be. However, well, yet they are a little
gaudy. All right. I feel that if you
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00:09:32,900 --> 00:09:35,540
feel... Oh, this is you as a boy. Very
lovely.
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00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:38,260
I don't know why.
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00:09:38,600 --> 00:09:41,920
Why they make these rules, but those are
the rules that... But there's one thing
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I must consist on. Watch that.
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00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:46,540
You will water those geraniums, won't
you?
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Take these things and get out of here.
Get out? Well, I'm sure if you want to
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00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:55,680
privately concerned for a moment, that's
all right with me. But believe me, my
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00:09:55,680 --> 00:09:58,840
hands are tied. I don't want you in that
upper bunk. It's just that was the only
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00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:02,320
bunk open. And if they're going to react
that way, believe me, I don't... I
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00:10:02,320 --> 00:10:03,320
don't... Here.
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00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:07,920
You take the upper bunk and if I catch
you snoring... What happened, Sarge?
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00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:10,680
happened? What? What happened? What do
you mean, what happened? What? You're
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00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:13,860
going to let him get away with it? Get
away with... Don't you fellas ever
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00:10:13,860 --> 00:10:14,900
understand anything?
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00:10:15,610 --> 00:10:17,930
I convinced him to have my room. Don't
you see that?
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00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:21,070
Don't you recognize he's going through a
cocoon period?
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00:10:21,570 --> 00:10:26,430
Freud definitely says that when a man is
rejected from society in his mind and
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the frustrations within, he will
withdraw from the world.
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00:10:29,740 --> 00:10:33,660
Oh, if I didn't see this with my own
eyes, I wouldn't believe it. Somebody
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00:10:33,660 --> 00:10:36,080
have spread some breadcrumbs around. The
pigeons are back.
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00:10:36,300 --> 00:10:38,580
Oh, it's pathetic. Philco ain't even
putting up a fight.
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00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:39,819
Do you mind?
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00:10:39,820 --> 00:10:43,160
Do you mind if I like to see a man as
comfortable since he's only going to be
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00:10:43,160 --> 00:10:46,900
here for a week? Oh, he's going to be
gone in a week. Gone and forgotten.
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00:10:47,140 --> 00:10:51,000
Would you like to make a little bet on
that? Oh, you insist on throwing your
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00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:51,699
money away.
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00:10:51,700 --> 00:10:53,100
I'll throw $20.
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00:10:53,850 --> 00:10:56,250
All righty, we'll just cover that,
Rocco. Me too. I'm in.
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00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:59,570
You ask for it, there it is, and he'll
be out of here in a week.
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00:10:59,850 --> 00:11:01,710
One week. Gone and forgotten.
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00:11:02,050 --> 00:11:03,370
Oh, that I gotta see.
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00:11:05,610 --> 00:11:07,530
Hey, Sarge. Sarge, are you crazy?
205
00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:11,490
He's a monster. You can't out -talk him
because he don't hear you. True, boys.
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00:11:11,590 --> 00:11:13,090
He's a brute. He's a hunk.
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00:11:13,430 --> 00:11:16,410
But all we gotta do is get him to think.
To think?
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00:11:16,690 --> 00:11:20,050
To think. We gotta lull him into a false
sense of security.
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00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:21,640
We'll throw him a party.
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00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:23,120
Boys,
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00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:25,800
boys, you continually doubt me.
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00:11:26,100 --> 00:11:28,720
Believe me, it's a small brain it has.
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00:11:28,940 --> 00:11:32,720
It takes a long time for it to warm up,
but we've got to reach that brain. We've
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00:11:32,720 --> 00:11:33,820
got to start him to think.
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00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:37,920
Once he starts to think, there'll be
nothing but a shattered shell.
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00:11:38,860 --> 00:11:41,040
Think. That's what we've got to do.
217
00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:44,620
How's your steak, Sergeant Benton?
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00:11:44,860 --> 00:11:46,380
You can call me Beast.
219
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,980
He said I can call him Beast. He's
accepted me.
220
00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:53,760
Men, we made the right decision. I'm
glad we did it.
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00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:55,059
Did what?
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00:11:55,060 --> 00:11:56,060
Did what?
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00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:58,400
Sergeant, what do you figure you're
worth?
224
00:11:59,540 --> 00:12:02,500
Worth? Yes, in dollars and cents. What
do you feel you're worth?
225
00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:04,359
I don't know.
226
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:05,360
We know.
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00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:08,640
You do? Yes, sir. We figure you're worth
$100 ,000.
228
00:12:09,540 --> 00:12:13,840
You figure I'm worth $100 ,000? Sitting
there calmly eating your steak, you're
229
00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:16,680
worth $100 ,000. Who says so?
230
00:12:17,460 --> 00:12:19,040
This says so. What's that?
231
00:12:19,580 --> 00:12:23,580
An insurance policy in your name for
$100 ,000. The boys want the world to
232
00:12:23,580 --> 00:12:24,559
what they think of you.
233
00:12:24,560 --> 00:12:25,740
$100 ,000?
234
00:12:26,100 --> 00:12:28,320
Not everybody can say that, can they?
235
00:12:28,580 --> 00:12:31,160
Yeah, but my old man said I wouldn't
amount to nothing.
236
00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:37,140
There it is, black and white. $100 ,000
insured for Sergeant Quentin Q.
237
00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:39,200
Penton. Oh, I forgot.
238
00:12:39,460 --> 00:12:42,260
You gotta pass the insurance physical
exam first.
239
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:45,800
I never flunked a physical in my life.
Oh, fine, Mr.
240
00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:48,620
Crawford. The insurance man is waiting
at the doctor's office.
241
00:12:49,230 --> 00:12:51,070
Out of my way. Sarge, well?
242
00:12:51,410 --> 00:12:53,570
He's not thinking yet. He's not thinking
yet.
243
00:12:56,050 --> 00:13:00,590
Hey, beastie baby, baby boy. Mr.
Crawford, you could insure him for a
244
00:13:00,790 --> 00:13:02,730
Well, he's the strongest man I've ever
seen.
245
00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:06,210
Here you are. You sign right here,
Sergeant Patton. Yeah.
246
00:13:06,830 --> 00:13:08,570
A hundred thousand bucks, eh?
247
00:13:09,030 --> 00:13:10,690
That's one T in Benton.
248
00:13:10,930 --> 00:13:11,930
Thanks.
249
00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:13,760
Thank you.
250
00:13:14,020 --> 00:13:17,780
Now, Sergeant Bilko. Yes, indeedy. Sign
right here, please. Right there. Why
251
00:13:17,780 --> 00:13:19,620
does he have to sign? He's the
beneficiary.
252
00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:26,000
Now, I'll take a look at those records,
please. Fine, fine. Rocco, Henshaw.
253
00:13:26,260 --> 00:13:28,640
Second beneficiary. Third beneficiary.
254
00:13:29,260 --> 00:13:32,740
What's a beneficiary? Oh, don't you
worry a pretty little head about it.
255
00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:36,920
I mean, we just, you know, we just put
up the money. It cost us $60 for the
256
00:13:36,920 --> 00:13:37,679
first month.
257
00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:40,480
After all, we're your benefactors.
Beastie, baby, my.
258
00:13:44,430 --> 00:13:47,410
Sarge, he's going all over the post
telling everybody he's worth a hundred
259
00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:49,890
grand. Yes, Sarge. When is he going to
start thinking?
260
00:13:50,170 --> 00:13:53,890
Rocco, baby, patience, patience. This is
a small brain.
261
00:13:54,270 --> 00:13:59,610
Takes a long time to warm up, but once
the thoughts start getting to it, pow, a
262
00:13:59,610 --> 00:14:00,609
nervous wreck.
263
00:14:00,610 --> 00:14:03,770
Make way for a hundred thousand bucks.
264
00:14:04,190 --> 00:14:08,290
Hey, beastie baby, don't move so fast
you lose weight. After all, you're worth
265
00:14:08,290 --> 00:14:09,970
$500 a pound.
266
00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:12,330
$500 a pound. Have big mouths.
267
00:14:14,170 --> 00:14:15,430
Where's Krim? He's inside.
268
00:14:15,650 --> 00:14:17,310
He doesn't know about it yet. No, he
don't.
269
00:14:19,850 --> 00:14:20,850
Hiya, Beast.
270
00:14:20,990 --> 00:14:24,710
Hiya. What are you so happy about? Did
you see somebody get run over by a
271
00:14:25,290 --> 00:14:30,550
Krim, what would you say if you had the
honor of meeting a guy who was insured
272
00:14:30,550 --> 00:14:32,070
for a hundred thousand bucks?
273
00:14:32,370 --> 00:14:34,930
What'd I say? I'd say I'd like to be his
beneficiary.
274
00:14:37,450 --> 00:14:39,470
Beneficiary? Why the beneficiary?
275
00:14:39,730 --> 00:14:43,070
Well, because the beneficiary gets the
hundred grand when the guy dies.
276
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,380
He's starting to think.
277
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:51,720
Of course, that's for a natural death.
If the guy has an accident or gets
278
00:14:51,720 --> 00:14:56,660
killed, that's called double indemnity
and the beneficiary gets $200 ,000.
279
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:02,560
Yeah? Oh, he's thinking like crazy now.
280
00:15:03,180 --> 00:15:05,680
Boy, you sure got this post by the ears.
281
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,780
You're the sixth drill sergeant this
place has had this year.
282
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,720
Yeah? Not one of them lasted more than a
week.
283
00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:15,500
Yeah, Bilko took care of them.
284
00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:17,360
Yeah?
285
00:15:17,940 --> 00:15:20,760
Yeah. What happened to them? How did
they die?
286
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,540
Die? I don't know. Did they?
287
00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:25,060
Hey, Beastie, are you worried about
something?
288
00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:29,940
Me? Absolutely not a thing to worry
about. I'm in fine shape. Hiya, Beastie
289
00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:32,000
Stay away from me. What's the matter?
290
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:33,600
Nothing. Why?
291
00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:36,980
I don't know. Maybe it's the light
you're in. You look a little... Oh, a
292
00:15:36,980 --> 00:15:38,980
hot soup and you're gonna feel fine.
293
00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:42,160
I made it myself. Come on, Beastie boy.
Have them.
294
00:15:43,690 --> 00:15:45,130
I feel absolutely great.
295
00:15:45,330 --> 00:15:47,670
Doctor said I was the finest specimen he
ever saw.
296
00:15:47,910 --> 00:15:49,030
I should live to be 110.
297
00:15:49,570 --> 00:15:50,870
Oh, you live to be 150.
298
00:15:51,530 --> 00:15:54,070
Eat your soup, old man in the mountain.
299
00:15:55,290 --> 00:15:58,750
I guess I'm a lot healthier than those
other sergeants you had around here.
300
00:15:58,970 --> 00:16:02,530
With them, it was accidental, but they
like my soup.
301
00:16:03,670 --> 00:16:07,910
Have some of it, pal. I want you to have
some of it. Why, we're going to see to
302
00:16:07,910 --> 00:16:08,910
it that you live forever.
303
00:16:09,450 --> 00:16:11,230
Forever? In our hearts.
304
00:16:11,850 --> 00:16:16,130
Have your soup, pal. After all, we can't
have $200 ,000 worth of soldier fading
305
00:16:16,130 --> 00:16:17,130
away.
306
00:16:18,050 --> 00:16:20,410
Why are you so anxious I should eat that
soup?
307
00:16:20,970 --> 00:16:24,290
Anxious? I'm not anxious. Just a little
midnight snack. I prepared it myself.
308
00:16:24,470 --> 00:16:25,970
You taste it. Me?
309
00:16:26,570 --> 00:16:27,610
I already ate.
310
00:16:28,410 --> 00:16:32,390
You second beneficiary. You taste it.
No, thanks. Give me heat cups.
311
00:16:32,610 --> 00:16:34,010
You taste it. No, no, no.
312
00:16:34,230 --> 00:16:36,410
I'll taste it. No, no, no. You crazy.
313
00:16:36,670 --> 00:16:37,670
Get out of here.
314
00:16:39,130 --> 00:16:41,910
Come on, Beastie boy, every little
spoonful.
315
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:43,210
Yeah, I know you don't.
316
00:16:43,690 --> 00:16:47,790
Why did you do that for? Now look, that
grass won't grow back for a year.
317
00:16:49,890 --> 00:16:52,810
When it does grow back, I ain't gonna be
underneath it.
318
00:16:54,030 --> 00:16:57,850
Beastie, if you don't mind my saying,
you look a little frightened or scared.
319
00:16:59,010 --> 00:17:03,020
Scared? I ain't scared of nobody, and
mostly I ain't scared of you, you
320
00:17:03,020 --> 00:17:06,720
understand? Beastie, baby boy, what's
happening to your pal?
321
00:17:07,079 --> 00:17:10,180
You mustn't be scared of any, especially
your beneficiary.
322
00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:16,099
I'm your pal, pal, your beneficiary. Of
course, if you don't like me... Wait, I
323
00:17:16,099 --> 00:17:22,260
like you. It's just maybe I've been
thinking too much. That may be it. Get a
324
00:17:22,260 --> 00:17:22,979
little rest.
325
00:17:22,980 --> 00:17:25,359
You know, maybe I had you all wrong,
ain't he?
326
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:27,440
Boys!
327
00:17:27,740 --> 00:17:29,180
Beast wants to save you tonight.
328
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,250
Good night, fellas.
329
00:17:31,530 --> 00:17:32,850
Goodbye, beast.
330
00:17:35,310 --> 00:17:37,950
Oh, that's nothing. Just a slip of the
tongue.
331
00:17:38,230 --> 00:17:39,690
Hiya, crazy eyes boy.
332
00:17:44,610 --> 00:17:46,410
Oh, I'm glad.
333
00:17:47,030 --> 00:17:48,570
I'm glad you noticed him.
334
00:17:48,810 --> 00:17:51,610
I meant to tell you about him. I'm glad
you found out for yourself.
335
00:17:51,870 --> 00:17:55,530
Watch out for him. You see, if he comes
at you during the night, just take away
336
00:17:55,530 --> 00:17:56,770
the bayonet from him. That's all.
337
00:17:57,879 --> 00:18:01,520
Yeah, you see, he still thinks he's back
in the South Pacific. We're kind of
338
00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:05,240
proud of him in the medical corps. He's
the only guy that dreams in Japanese.
339
00:18:05,820 --> 00:18:09,380
Yeah, he's got that... He's a... He's
American.
340
00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:12,720
American man. He with us. American.
341
00:18:13,060 --> 00:18:15,940
You see, I got nothing to worry about.
He gives you plenty of water.
342
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:17,160
You know what I mean?
343
00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:22,700
Now, before he lunges, before he lunges,
he'll always yell, You listen for that.
344
00:18:23,169 --> 00:18:26,190
Bonsai. That'll give you time to prepare
yourself and take the bayonet away from
345
00:18:26,190 --> 00:18:29,690
you. Other than that, he's harmless.
Just watch out for that bonsai.
346
00:18:30,570 --> 00:18:31,570
Thank you, Tom.
347
00:18:38,610 --> 00:18:39,610
Bonsai!
348
00:18:41,650 --> 00:18:44,790
Did you hear that?
349
00:18:45,090 --> 00:18:46,650
Yeah. What did that sound like?
350
00:18:47,110 --> 00:18:48,290
Bonsai. Good boy.
351
00:18:48,510 --> 00:18:52,420
The last guy who was here... He thought
he heard bird's eye. He got cut from
352
00:18:52,420 --> 00:18:53,420
eating it.
353
00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:55,480
All right, pal.
354
00:18:55,680 --> 00:18:56,680
You're okay.
355
00:18:57,260 --> 00:19:00,320
You got nothing, nothing at all to worry
about.
356
00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:04,120
Sure,
357
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:11,300
I... I ain't got nothing to worry about.
I...
358
00:19:24,300 --> 00:19:26,240
How'd you sleep, Sarge? Like a baby.
359
00:19:26,460 --> 00:19:27,960
Hey, Sarge, what's going on in there?
360
00:19:28,340 --> 00:19:29,740
Thinking. All night.
361
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:31,160
Thinking.
362
00:19:36,660 --> 00:19:37,660
Who is it?
363
00:19:37,980 --> 00:19:40,100
It's just me, Big Mouth.
364
00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:41,300
Oh.
365
00:19:42,120 --> 00:19:43,120
Are you alone?
366
00:19:43,580 --> 00:19:45,620
Oh, I just got one of the boys with me.
367
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:47,720
Just a minute.
368
00:19:51,950 --> 00:19:52,950
Beastie boy!
369
00:19:53,610 --> 00:19:55,190
I'll get a little hot breakfast for you.
370
00:19:55,570 --> 00:19:57,250
Crazy eyes.
371
00:19:57,590 --> 00:19:58,590
He made it for himself.
372
00:20:00,010 --> 00:20:03,230
Get that in you, pal.
373
00:20:03,530 --> 00:20:04,309
I ain't hungry.
374
00:20:04,310 --> 00:20:05,310
You're not hungry.
375
00:20:05,990 --> 00:20:07,750
Beastie baby, you got us worried.
376
00:20:08,150 --> 00:20:10,830
What do you mean? Well, the boys in the
platoon are talking. They say the whole
377
00:20:10,830 --> 00:20:12,790
platoon is cracking up because you're
going soft.
378
00:20:13,010 --> 00:20:16,590
I ain't going soft. I ain't afraid of
nobody. That's the old Beastie baby we
379
00:20:16,590 --> 00:20:19,310
know. Come on in and whip this platoon
right into shape.
380
00:20:19,590 --> 00:20:20,810
All right, I'll show them.
381
00:20:21,830 --> 00:20:22,830
All right, men.
382
00:20:23,310 --> 00:20:25,210
Now, here it is. Present arms.
383
00:20:25,570 --> 00:20:26,570
Halt!
384
00:20:28,390 --> 00:20:30,530
Beastie, what's the matter, baby boy?
385
00:20:30,770 --> 00:20:33,690
What's the matter? These guys gone
crazy? What's the matter with you
386
00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:38,010
said present arms. I didn't say aim and
fire. Oh, you, you bad soldiers. Never
387
00:20:38,010 --> 00:20:39,030
aim at anybody, understand?
388
00:20:39,510 --> 00:20:40,590
Never aim at anybody.
389
00:20:41,370 --> 00:20:44,550
There's nothing to worry about, though.
Those rifles are not loaded.
390
00:20:44,770 --> 00:20:45,890
Put those rifles down.
391
00:20:47,790 --> 00:20:49,090
It was all a mistake.
392
00:20:49,290 --> 00:20:51,110
It was a mistake, Beastie boy.
393
00:20:52,170 --> 00:20:53,370
terrible mistake they made.
394
00:20:58,070 --> 00:21:01,350
Beast, you can't go on like this for a
whole week. Now you haven't eaten, you
395
00:21:01,350 --> 00:21:03,190
haven't slept, you haven't left the
room.
396
00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:04,430
I ain't afraid of anybody.
397
00:21:04,630 --> 00:21:07,850
Well, it's just because Bilko shot his
mouth off and said you'd be gone and
398
00:21:07,850 --> 00:21:09,090
forgotten in a week. A week?
399
00:21:09,610 --> 00:21:10,610
Today's the last day.
400
00:21:10,790 --> 00:21:14,130
Today's the last day of the week. If I
can just lay low for today, then nothing
401
00:21:14,130 --> 00:21:15,270
will happen to me. I'll be sick.
402
00:21:15,670 --> 00:21:17,110
I ain't letting nobody in.
403
00:21:17,510 --> 00:21:18,810
It's the colonel, Beast.
404
00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:21,030
Oh, the colonel. I have to let him in.
Oh.
405
00:21:21,370 --> 00:21:22,370
Let's take this away.
406
00:21:27,990 --> 00:21:28,990
Colonel Hall?
407
00:21:29,450 --> 00:21:33,270
Benton, you came here with a reputation
as a tough drill sergeant.
408
00:21:33,890 --> 00:21:37,070
Now, what's happened? You've been here
for a week, and this platoon hasn't even
409
00:21:37,070 --> 00:21:38,069
been out of the barracks.
410
00:21:38,070 --> 00:21:41,110
Oh, sir, we do march to the mess hall up
and back every day. Quiet!
411
00:21:42,630 --> 00:21:46,350
Benton, I order you to take them out
today. I want to hear the rifle firing.
412
00:21:46,730 --> 00:21:49,230
And you will, sir. All we want is a
chance, sir.
413
00:21:53,580 --> 00:21:54,600
That's an order, Benton.
414
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:58,000
Get out of this barracks and in front of
those men.
415
00:21:58,340 --> 00:21:59,340
In front of those men?
416
00:22:00,500 --> 00:22:01,500
That's an order.
417
00:22:02,780 --> 00:22:03,780
Yes, sir.
418
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:07,760
Fisty baby boy, when do we start?
419
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:11,380
I'll be right with you. All righty.
420
00:22:13,180 --> 00:22:16,360
Go. Are you crazy? The colonel is in on
it, too.
421
00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:19,780
Am I?
422
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:24,150
Today's the day. Today's the day I'm
supposed to get it.
423
00:22:24,590 --> 00:22:26,030
He's really thinking now.
424
00:22:26,590 --> 00:22:28,230
Beast, it's all in your mind.
425
00:22:28,790 --> 00:22:29,790
Is it?
426
00:22:30,310 --> 00:22:32,750
Paparelli and Doberman are out there
picking flowers.
427
00:22:33,930 --> 00:22:37,130
Beast, maybe you ought to go and have a
talk with the chaplain.
428
00:22:37,730 --> 00:22:40,330
Yeah, the chaplain. Why didn't I think
of that before?
429
00:22:40,630 --> 00:22:41,569
Where's my hat?
430
00:22:41,570 --> 00:22:44,370
He's going to go see the chaplain.
Sarge, the chaplain will give everything
431
00:22:44,370 --> 00:22:45,970
away. Not if I get there first.
432
00:22:46,230 --> 00:22:47,650
Positions be like I told him.
433
00:22:58,220 --> 00:22:58,779
Hi, fellas.
434
00:22:58,780 --> 00:23:00,140
Hi, Beast. Hi, Beast.
435
00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,840
You fellas know where the chaplain is on
this post?
436
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:05,520
Yeah, the other side of the parade
ground.
437
00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,640
Thanks, Al. Would you like me to show
you?
438
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:12,860
No, no thanks. I think I can find it.
439
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:17,240
Sergeant, would you mind holding this up
to your head there? That's it.
440
00:23:22,620 --> 00:23:24,520
Make it six foot five.
441
00:23:26,220 --> 00:23:27,420
With silver hair.
442
00:23:34,660 --> 00:23:35,960
Hello, Beast.
443
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:37,320
Hiya, Beast.
444
00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:39,200
Hiya, fellas.
445
00:23:45,540 --> 00:23:46,540
Yes,
446
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:53,900
Captain, I wrote the boys' folks, and I
think everything's going to be all
447
00:23:53,900 --> 00:23:54,879
right.
448
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:55,880
You're quite welcome.
449
00:23:56,910 --> 00:24:01,030
So now you're a reporter on the Post
newspaper, right? Yes, chaplain. Too
450
00:24:01,030 --> 00:24:03,830
I've lived in the world of make
-believe. Now I want the facts, sir.
451
00:24:04,070 --> 00:24:07,390
Facts? Yes. You know the wonderful
speech you made, that farewell speech
452
00:24:07,390 --> 00:24:10,290
Sergeant McMahon got his discharge and
he got into the Air Force?
453
00:24:10,550 --> 00:24:13,750
It really wasn't much of a speech. Oh,
it was wonderful, and I'm going to put
454
00:24:13,750 --> 00:24:15,750
on the front page, sir. I'm meeting a
deadline.
455
00:24:16,050 --> 00:24:20,750
If I remember correctly, it went this
way. This is a sad occasion. This is a
456
00:24:20,750 --> 00:24:26,730
occasion. Saying farewell to a soldier
is always a sad and trying thing.
457
00:24:27,570 --> 00:24:33,370
Although he was with us only a short
while, we grew to love him and will
458
00:24:33,370 --> 00:24:34,370
his memory.
459
00:24:36,270 --> 00:24:41,910
But let us console ourselves with a
thought that although we'll miss him
460
00:24:41,910 --> 00:24:47,170
here, by tomorrow he'll be up there
soaring high.
461
00:24:50,700 --> 00:24:53,620
You want any more? No, no, that's fine.
That's fine. I got it all I want, and
462
00:24:53,620 --> 00:24:56,020
thank you. It serves... Thank you very
much, chaplain. Bilko.
463
00:24:56,340 --> 00:24:57,340
Sir?
464
00:24:57,520 --> 00:25:00,100
I have a feeling I've just been taken.
465
00:25:01,940 --> 00:25:04,840
Taken? Chaplain. Would I do anything
like that to you, sir?
466
00:25:05,060 --> 00:25:06,060
Yes.
467
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:11,240
All right, where is he? Where is he?
Sarge! Sarge, you missed it. He came in
468
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:13,980
here, picked up his gear, and then him
and that corporal took off. Man, they
469
00:25:13,980 --> 00:25:15,560
must be halfway to the next post,
finally.
470
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:18,240
Banzai!
471
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:22,900
It gives me a lesson to you guys when it
comes between a battle between brains
472
00:25:22,900 --> 00:25:24,540
and brawn. Dead on brains.
473
00:25:31,300 --> 00:25:33,600
Beast was played by George Matthews.
474
00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:35,900
Corporal Crim was Don Hanmer.
39803
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