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1
00:00:06,060 --> 00:00:07,740
Hello, friend. Who wants a hug?
2
00:00:09,900 --> 00:00:12,680
Andy, have you been painting in an
unventilated room again?
3
00:00:14,340 --> 00:00:15,980
I'm in love, James.
4
00:00:16,420 --> 00:00:19,320
I got the world on a string.
5
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:21,000
Why don't you wrap it around your neck?
6
00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:23,780
It's my Mandy.
7
00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:27,120
I'm head over heels. I've even written
her a poem. Tell me what you think.
8
00:00:29,340 --> 00:00:32,840
I love you, Mandy.
9
00:00:33,140 --> 00:00:34,860
From your man, Andy.
10
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You're sweet as candy on ocean or dry
landy. I think you're just dandy. I
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00:00:43,700 --> 00:00:45,940
love walking with you hand in handy.
12
00:00:47,420 --> 00:00:49,540
Don't you miss Jessica Tandy?
13
00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:58,340
What do you think? I think it's you I
can't standy.
14
00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:15,040
Mandy, for two weeks you can't go buying
her diamond earrings like this. It's
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00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:17,820
her birthday. I want to knock her socks
off. Well, then buy her socks.
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00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:23,320
If not diamond earrings, what? I don't
care. I need your help. I'll do whatever
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00:01:23,320 --> 00:01:24,320
you say.
18
00:01:26,960 --> 00:01:28,120
Guide me, master.
19
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:31,940
Fine. Fine. Sit down.
20
00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:34,460
You know what? I should charge you for
this.
21
00:01:34,900 --> 00:01:36,120
I'm going to give it to you for free.
22
00:01:36,380 --> 00:01:37,380
You're the best.
23
00:01:38,040 --> 00:01:39,400
No, wait a minute. Give me a dollar.
24
00:01:41,210 --> 00:01:43,530
Seriously? Yeah, give me a dollar. Go to
hell.
25
00:01:44,750 --> 00:01:46,510
Well, who needs a girl when you got your
mom?
26
00:01:50,590 --> 00:01:53,610
Fine. Here. Here's your stupid dollar.
27
00:01:54,710 --> 00:01:55,710
Thank you.
28
00:01:56,070 --> 00:01:57,070
Here's the thing.
29
00:01:57,550 --> 00:02:02,330
Most guys in a new relationship make the
mistake of thinking a good gift is an
30
00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:03,330
expensive gift.
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00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:10,930
That's your advice?
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00:02:11,830 --> 00:02:13,190
No, that's what you're doing wrong.
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00:02:13,430 --> 00:02:15,190
If you want advice, it's another dollar.
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00:02:17,290 --> 00:02:18,290
Go to hell.
35
00:02:18,770 --> 00:02:20,830
Fine. Change your own diapers when
you're 80.
36
00:02:23,630 --> 00:02:24,630
Fine.
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And damn you to hell.
38
00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:30,650
Thank you.
39
00:02:31,490 --> 00:02:34,530
Okay. Anybody can do an expensive gift.
40
00:02:34,990 --> 00:02:37,870
What you should be looking for is a
meaningful gift.
41
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:39,520
You mean cheap?
42
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:45,040
It can't be cheap if things line up
right.
43
00:02:46,920 --> 00:02:47,920
Here's the thing.
44
00:02:48,780 --> 00:02:55,500
The gift women really love is the gift
that says, I listen to you.
45
00:02:57,540 --> 00:03:01,340
Okay, okay. I can see the beauty of
that, Jim. But here's the thing.
46
00:03:01,900 --> 00:03:03,420
I don't listen to Mandy.
47
00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:08,740
I mean, you're with her all the time. I
know, but every time I'm with her, the
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00:03:08,740 --> 00:03:11,660
only thing I hear is this voice inside
my head saying, please don't leave me,
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00:03:11,720 --> 00:03:13,080
please don't leave me, please don't
leave me.
50
00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:17,900
Well, Andy, sounds like you need
advanced lessons. Yeah.
51
00:03:21,620 --> 00:03:23,700
No, no, no, no. I am desperate.
52
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:26,520
All right.
53
00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:32,720
On our 10th anniversary, I gave Cheryl a
teddy bear cookie jar that looked just
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00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:34,540
like the one she had when she was
growing up.
55
00:03:34,830 --> 00:03:37,570
Whoa, I don't remember us having a teddy
bear cookie jar.
56
00:03:38,550 --> 00:03:39,750
Neither did Cheryl.
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00:03:41,410 --> 00:03:45,030
Until I gave her one. Then suddenly, she
remembered.
58
00:03:45,530 --> 00:03:47,730
She cried and gave me a back rub.
59
00:03:49,110 --> 00:03:50,950
I could use a back rub.
60
00:03:51,430 --> 00:03:56,170
Or one of those hot stone massages. Oh,
it's how the Indians have relaxed for
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00:03:56,170 --> 00:04:02,410
centuries. What I realized a little
later was that wasn't Cheryl's story at
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00:04:02,990 --> 00:04:05,630
I was thinking about the cookie jar in
the Andy Griffith show.
63
00:04:06,690 --> 00:04:08,710
So you told Cheryl you made a mistake,
right?
64
00:04:10,230 --> 00:04:11,230
No.
65
00:04:12,030 --> 00:04:17,209
See, Andy, women are so desperate to
believe that their men are listening to
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00:04:17,209 --> 00:04:19,550
them that they'll buy into anything.
67
00:04:21,490 --> 00:04:24,510
So just buy Mandy a gift, make up a
story.
68
00:04:27,210 --> 00:04:32,520
Eh, that sounds a little dishonest.
Andy, it is totally... Really dishonest.
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00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:37,980
You have to understand, we're selling
feelings, not the truth.
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00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:42,740
Oh, no, no, no, I'm not following. Well,
it's kind of like when Mandy says you
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00:04:42,740 --> 00:04:44,020
look great without your shirt on.
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00:04:46,060 --> 00:04:47,060
Oh. Right?
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00:04:47,980 --> 00:04:50,480
You know it's not the truth, but you
love hearing it.
74
00:04:52,300 --> 00:04:55,120
All I hear is, please don't leave me,
please don't leave me, please don't
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00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:56,120
me.
76
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:00,400
You know what?
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00:05:00,860 --> 00:05:01,860
You know what, Mandy?
78
00:05:01,940 --> 00:05:03,420
I cannot wait anymore.
79
00:05:03,660 --> 00:05:05,880
I want to give you your birthday
present. Oh!
80
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:11,200
Hey, happy birthday.
81
00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,960
You are going to love it. Oh, I'm so
excited.
82
00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:21,160
I put an extra little bit of the old
ticker into this one.
83
00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:26,680
Oh, a Chinese checker set.
84
00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:31,200
So, what do you think?
85
00:05:31,540 --> 00:05:33,040
I think it's a Chinese checker set.
86
00:05:34,840 --> 00:05:40,820
Or is it a vintage Chinese checker set
exactly like the one you and your
87
00:05:40,820 --> 00:05:42,720
favorite babysitter used to play with?
88
00:05:43,020 --> 00:05:45,380
I never played Chinese checkers in my
life.
89
00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:49,480
I actually find it a bit racist.
90
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:54,900
No, no, of course you did.
91
00:05:55,560 --> 00:05:57,820
You told me on our third date.
92
00:05:58,300 --> 00:06:02,260
Drinks at the Palmer House, you had a
Tom Collins, I had a Cosmo. This gift
93
00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:03,380
says, I listen.
94
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:07,380
Whew, got a hell of a kink right here.
95
00:06:09,260 --> 00:06:10,860
What was the babysitter's name?
96
00:06:16,260 --> 00:06:17,500
Eleanor. Eleanor what?
97
00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:18,720
Rigby.
98
00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:31,600
with Jackie Robinson, and she broke the
Chinese checkers barrier in my house.
99
00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:34,800
So it's coming back to you.
100
00:06:36,780 --> 00:06:40,180
Andy, you obviously heard this story
from another woman. You know, probably
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00:06:40,180 --> 00:06:41,180
whack job, Emily.
102
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:45,280
I knew you weren't over her yet. No,
baby, baby, please, please. You and me,
103
00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:46,820
we're for reals, huh?
104
00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:51,220
No, no, I haven't been engaged to Emily
for 17 days.
105
00:06:52,660 --> 00:06:55,360
This is the most insensitive gift I have
ever gotten.
106
00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:05,680
told me this story I
107
00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:11,660
made the whole thing up
108
00:07:11,660 --> 00:07:18,620
you did what I wanted to give you
something really really meaningful but
109
00:07:18,620 --> 00:07:25,440
I couldn't think of anything so I made
up I made up a stupid story that
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00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:29,700
has absolutely nothing to do with you
you made the whole thing up
111
00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:31,980
not believe you would sink that low.
112
00:07:32,340 --> 00:07:35,860
I mean, is it really that hard to give
me a gift based on who I am?
113
00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:40,620
Can I just say one more thing in my
defense?
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Go ahead.
115
00:07:43,040 --> 00:07:45,520
Please don't leave me. Please don't
leave me. Please don't leave me.
116
00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:53,120
I can't stay for dinner. Wait a minute.
You can't barge in here without knocking
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first. What if I was nude?
118
00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:57,000
I knocked the last time and you were
nude.
119
00:07:57,940 --> 00:07:59,320
Well, I thought you were the mailman.
120
00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:01,500
We got this running joke.
121
00:08:02,980 --> 00:08:04,540
I don't think he gets it, though.
122
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:08,280
I'm not staying for dinner because I'm
very upset with Andy.
123
00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:12,380
But I did bring your three -bean salad.
Oh, wow, look at that.
124
00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:13,820
Nice work.
125
00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:15,260
Okay, see ya.
126
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:16,960
No, no, no, wait.
127
00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:18,560
What happened?
128
00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:22,820
Andy gave me these Chinese checkers for
my birthday. Told me I played it as a
129
00:08:22,820 --> 00:08:25,460
kid, but it was just some stupid story
he made up.
130
00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:38,630
I mean, why would he do that?
131
00:08:39,570 --> 00:08:41,370
I guess we'll never know.
132
00:08:42,770 --> 00:08:43,589
See ya.
133
00:08:43,590 --> 00:08:44,590
No, no, no.
134
00:08:45,010 --> 00:08:46,050
I know what happened.
135
00:08:48,570 --> 00:08:49,570
You do?
136
00:08:49,770 --> 00:08:50,770
Yeah.
137
00:08:51,350 --> 00:08:52,350
It's all your fault.
138
00:08:54,170 --> 00:08:55,210
How would you know that?
139
00:08:56,590 --> 00:09:01,110
Because you always get me such great
anniversary gifts and Andy is trying to
140
00:09:01,110 --> 00:09:02,110
compete with you.
141
00:09:04,730 --> 00:09:06,130
That's how you know that.
142
00:09:07,530 --> 00:09:11,810
Look, you can't give Andy a hard time
because I set the bar so high. I mean,
143
00:09:11,830 --> 00:09:12,749
he's trying.
144
00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:14,770
Well, I guess his heart was in the right
place.
145
00:09:15,130 --> 00:09:16,130
Absolutely.
146
00:09:16,270 --> 00:09:19,010
Don't punish him because he's not as
classy as moi.
147
00:09:20,150 --> 00:09:21,150
See ya.
148
00:09:21,710 --> 00:09:26,750
Is Jim really a good gift giver? Oh, the
best. Yeah, I wouldn't expect that. Oh,
149
00:09:26,790 --> 00:09:29,970
yeah, he gets these simple, inexpensive
gifts that always have a thoughtful
150
00:09:29,970 --> 00:09:32,750
story behind them. He remembers every
detail.
151
00:09:33,410 --> 00:09:34,410
Really? Jim.
152
00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:37,180
You remember stories I don't even
remember telling.
153
00:09:39,140 --> 00:09:40,140
Oh, honey.
154
00:09:43,540 --> 00:09:48,180
I knew I never wanted wooden shoes as a
kid.
155
00:09:55,460 --> 00:09:57,280
Kidney garbanzo green.
156
00:09:58,020 --> 00:09:59,780
Kidney garbanzo green.
157
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:02,640
Kidney garbanzo green.
158
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:05,200
This Mandy can cook.
159
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:11,320
Yeah, you know, speaking of Mandy, our
conversation last night got me thinking.
160
00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:14,540
You know, you always give me such
meaningful, emotional gifts for our
161
00:10:14,540 --> 00:10:17,940
anniversary. And this year, I wanted to
do that for you.
162
00:10:18,460 --> 00:10:19,960
Well, that's going to be kind of hard,
Cheryl.
163
00:10:20,260 --> 00:10:22,080
I don't really have any meaningful
emotions.
164
00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:29,500
It was tough, but I think I found the
perfect gift, and it is waiting for you
165
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:30,500
the living room.
166
00:10:31,920 --> 00:10:32,920
Come on.
167
00:10:33,420 --> 00:10:35,220
You installed a toilet next to the
couch?
168
00:10:38,260 --> 00:10:39,880
Oh, this is going to be a great
anniversary.
169
00:10:40,460 --> 00:10:42,180
Come on, what are you doing? What are
you doing?
170
00:10:44,380 --> 00:10:51,340
Where the hell's my
171
00:10:51,340 --> 00:10:52,340
big screen TV?
172
00:10:52,460 --> 00:10:59,040
I replaced it with this super spectrum
astrotron in living
173
00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:00,840
color. Ta -da!
174
00:11:04,910 --> 00:11:07,070
It's exactly like the one you used to
watch with your uncle.
175
00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:13,570
When you were a kid, you used to stay up
late and watch the Blackhawks games.
176
00:11:17,570 --> 00:11:20,290
I don't remember watching any hockey
with any uncle.
177
00:11:20,510 --> 00:11:22,010
Oh, sure you do.
178
00:11:22,630 --> 00:11:24,650
You told me about it on our third date.
179
00:11:25,350 --> 00:11:27,890
I wouldn't make something like that up.
180
00:11:28,430 --> 00:11:30,970
You'd have to be a pretty horrible
person to do something like that.
181
00:11:41,070 --> 00:11:43,830
So, Jim, is there something you'd like
to tell me?
182
00:11:51,270 --> 00:11:52,270
Yes.
183
00:11:53,050 --> 00:11:54,050
Yes, Cheryl.
184
00:11:55,570 --> 00:11:56,850
I'd love this TV!
185
00:11:58,530 --> 00:12:01,410
Wow! Look at that! What a great gift,
honey!
186
00:12:03,190 --> 00:12:05,770
Hey, will you look at that?
187
00:12:06,210 --> 00:12:07,690
All three channels!
188
00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:15,240
This is so great. I feel like my uncle
is here with me. My uncle, what was his
189
00:12:15,240 --> 00:12:16,640
name? Bite me.
190
00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:20,200
Yeah, yeah.
191
00:12:20,820 --> 00:12:25,220
Uncle Bite Me, who was married to my
Aunt Kramit.
192
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:30,220
Stop it. All right, all right, you got
me, all right? Maybe I fudge a few
193
00:12:30,220 --> 00:12:32,060
details on a couple of anniversaries.
194
00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:33,320
No, Jim.
195
00:12:49,580 --> 00:12:52,080
You told me that my mom and I used to
drink cocoa out of a mug like this after
196
00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:53,080
we'd go ice skating.
197
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:55,360
Oh, Cheryl.
198
00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:57,480
That is such a beautiful story.
199
00:12:59,580 --> 00:13:01,000
I'm getting all choked up.
200
00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:02,380
You lied!
201
00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:04,740
And this stupid thing.
202
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:06,960
Sheep on wheels?
203
00:13:08,660 --> 00:13:09,660
Stupid?
204
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:12,780
Do you know how hard it is to find a
sheep on wheels?
205
00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:17,820
I mean, you can find a pig on wheels.
206
00:13:19,560 --> 00:13:20,960
Try coming up with a story on that.
207
00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:24,080
And my personal favorite?
208
00:13:25,360 --> 00:13:26,360
The wood plane.
209
00:13:27,520 --> 00:13:32,780
A wood plane, Jim? Cheryl, Cheryl, if we
didn't have that wood plane, these
210
00:13:32,780 --> 00:13:34,560
wooden shoes wouldn't have fit right.
211
00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:37,280
You suck.
212
00:13:39,060 --> 00:13:42,460
Okay, Cheryl, to be fair here, okay? If
you would have caught me with that
213
00:13:42,460 --> 00:13:45,440
cookie jar, the other several eyes
wouldn't have happened.
214
00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:48,240
It kind of rests on your shoulders, too,
babe.
215
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,080
You know what? You even admitted to it.
When?
216
00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:56,100
Well, we've been dating for about six
months.
217
00:13:56,540 --> 00:13:59,800
We're having drinks at the Palmer house.
And you said, if you ever have to lie.
218
00:14:00,020 --> 00:14:01,020
Oh, my God.
219
00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:02,580
You're doing it now.
220
00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:05,560
You caught me.
221
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:07,600
See, we're progressing.
222
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:12,200
We have a growing relationship.
223
00:14:14,900 --> 00:14:17,900
Fine. I'm going to go grow in the
kitchen.
224
00:14:19,820 --> 00:14:20,820
Wait, Cheryl, stop.
225
00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:22,760
Before you go.
226
00:14:23,820 --> 00:14:25,260
Can you flip it over to seven?
227
00:14:37,620 --> 00:14:43,340
So, tell me again how much you love
those diamond earrings?
228
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:45,320
Ooh, I love my new diamond earrings.
229
00:14:45,700 --> 00:14:48,160
I knew you would, baby.
230
00:14:48,580 --> 00:14:50,140
Diamonds don't need a story.
231
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,820
Okay, you can go get those hot stones
out of the oven now.
232
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,680
Are you sure this is how they do this?
233
00:14:57,940 --> 00:14:58,899
Oh, yeah.
234
00:14:58,900 --> 00:15:01,800
It's an old Indian ritual dating back a
thousand years.
235
00:15:02,060 --> 00:15:03,840
Of course, they didn't have the
convection oven.
236
00:15:05,340 --> 00:15:07,580
I know, but an hour at 450?
237
00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:09,040
Just do it!
238
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:47,240
I'm fine. I'll be great.
239
00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:52,580
Hey, what are you cooking in here?
Burgers?
240
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:55,400
Honey, let me go get you some ointment.
241
00:15:58,540 --> 00:16:02,940
I'm tapping that.
242
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:07,560
I thought you were in a dog house.
243
00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:12,940
I bought her diamonds, Jim. I can do no
wrong. I can listen, not listen, call
244
00:16:12,940 --> 00:16:13,940
her by the wrong name.
245
00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:15,980
All she hears is, look at me sparkle.
246
00:16:16,980 --> 00:16:18,480
Andy, I really need you.
247
00:16:18,980 --> 00:16:20,880
Can you put those cows back in the barn?
248
00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,260
Look, you really screwed me up with
Cheryl.
249
00:16:27,580 --> 00:16:31,600
How is that my fault? Because your lies
sucked and that screwed up my brilliant
250
00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:35,980
lies. You know what, Jim? What? Andy,
please put it away.
251
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,840
No, no, no. Why don't you buy your wife
something nice instead of taking the
252
00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:40,839
easy way out?
253
00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:41,840
Easy?
254
00:16:42,060 --> 00:16:46,300
You think it's easy coming up? and
convincing lies and sticking to them for
255
00:16:46,300 --> 00:16:47,300
these years?
256
00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:51,360
Nothing in here is easy.
257
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:56,720
Jim, I'm all blissed out from my
massage. You're kind of harsh in my rub.
258
00:16:57,900 --> 00:17:00,700
Fine. I'll figure out something for
myself.
259
00:17:01,620 --> 00:17:02,780
Be cool, bro.
260
00:17:20,460 --> 00:17:21,660
Hate teaching gym lessons.
261
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:26,560
Hello, my dear wife.
262
00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:30,160
Happy anniversary.
263
00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:31,640
What's this?
264
00:17:31,720 --> 00:17:34,580
Irregular socks that my feet grew to
different sizes when I was eight?
265
00:17:36,900 --> 00:17:37,900
No.
266
00:17:38,340 --> 00:17:42,600
This is a real gift from a real store,
not from some guy in the corner selling
267
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:44,180
rugs or day -old meats.
268
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:46,900
Which, by the way, I got dinner covered.
269
00:17:48,970 --> 00:17:49,970
Happy anniversary.
270
00:17:53,170 --> 00:17:54,170
Jim.
271
00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,290
Oh, my God. Diamond earrings?
272
00:17:57,690 --> 00:17:58,690
Mm -hmm.
273
00:17:58,890 --> 00:18:02,790
And the only story that goes with that
is that they were very expensive.
274
00:18:04,210 --> 00:18:05,210
Oh,
275
00:18:06,030 --> 00:18:07,310
Jim, they're beautiful.
276
00:18:07,530 --> 00:18:08,870
I love them. Thank you.
277
00:18:09,810 --> 00:18:10,810
You like them, huh?
278
00:18:10,930 --> 00:18:12,370
Oh, yes. You sure?
279
00:18:12,750 --> 00:18:13,890
You sure you want to keep them?
280
00:18:18,700 --> 00:18:19,860
Are they from a dead person?
281
00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:24,160
No, Cheryl. You know I've been banned
from the morgue.
282
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:29,980
Then I want to keep them.
283
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:31,620
Hold on to that thought.
284
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:39,360
Would you like to keep these diamonds
that you have no emotional connection to
285
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:45,160
whatsoever, or would you rather have
this mug in my hand?
286
00:18:48,910 --> 00:18:50,750
What are you doing? I'm giving you a
choice.
287
00:18:52,130 --> 00:18:53,830
Expensive, meaningless earrings.
288
00:18:54,590 --> 00:18:57,190
Inexpensive, meaningful mug.
289
00:18:57,990 --> 00:19:00,630
What's so meaningful about that? You got
it free when you opened a checking
290
00:19:00,630 --> 00:19:01,630
account.
291
00:19:03,750 --> 00:19:04,750
Yes.
292
00:19:05,330 --> 00:19:08,970
But then you started using this mug
every morning to drink your tea.
293
00:19:09,790 --> 00:19:14,050
And I remember you telling me that you
were pregnant with Kyle while drinking
294
00:19:14,050 --> 00:19:15,050
out of this mug.
295
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:19,800
You're not making that up.
296
00:19:21,380 --> 00:19:24,700
No, because I remember hoping that you
were making that up.
297
00:19:27,020 --> 00:19:29,320
So, what's it going to be?
298
00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:31,880
Earrings mug, earrings mug, earrings
mug.
299
00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:38,760
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Before you
decide, if you take this mug, I will
300
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:42,540
throw in, for free, sheep on wheels.
301
00:19:44,740 --> 00:19:47,460
Don't you remember Kyle picked this up
and uttered his first words?
302
00:19:51,350 --> 00:19:55,730
Doggy. Okay, okay, I get it. We built a
lifetime of memories on your foundation
303
00:19:55,730 --> 00:19:56,509
of lies.
304
00:19:56,510 --> 00:19:57,510
No, Cheryl.
305
00:19:57,610 --> 00:20:01,310
We built a lifetime of memories on my...
Oh, you do get it.
306
00:20:04,910 --> 00:20:11,870
Cheryl, I know I may be different than
other men, but I certainly am not
307
00:20:14,070 --> 00:20:15,630
No, honey, you're not boring.
308
00:20:15,930 --> 00:20:17,290
In fact, you sparkle.
309
00:20:18,120 --> 00:20:20,700
which is what makes these so meaningful.
310
00:20:21,100 --> 00:20:23,000
It's like they're a reflection of you.
311
00:20:28,340 --> 00:20:30,900
Sure, all I did was go to a mall and buy
them.
312
00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:36,480
But I put a lot of thought and effort
into finding these gifts.
313
00:20:37,460 --> 00:20:42,580
But I thought the most important thing
about a gift is the time and thought you
314
00:20:42,580 --> 00:20:43,580
put into it.
315
00:20:43,930 --> 00:20:46,530
No, actually, that's not as important as
how shiny they are.
316
00:20:48,190 --> 00:20:52,530
In fact, the less you think, the sexier
you get to me.
317
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:59,710
Really? Oh, yeah. If you stop thinking
altogether, you just might get lucky.
318
00:21:01,850 --> 00:21:02,850
Really?
319
00:21:03,870 --> 00:21:05,770
Oh, honey, I love these.
320
00:21:06,310 --> 00:21:07,310
What do you think?
321
00:21:09,070 --> 00:21:10,070
Nothing.
322
00:21:16,719 --> 00:21:19,220
Jim, Mandy can't find her earrings.
25067
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