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1
00:00:01,370 --> 00:00:04,490
Oh, Andy, I am so excited for Cheryl to
see this.
2
00:00:04,870 --> 00:00:08,630
I don't know what's more shocking, that
you remembered your anniversary or that
3
00:00:08,630 --> 00:00:11,090
you didn't just buy a gift at the gas
station on the way home.
4
00:00:11,790 --> 00:00:13,530
Andy, you can only get away with that
once.
5
00:00:14,990 --> 00:00:20,090
Cheryl, for once, let me be the first to
say, happy anniversary.
6
00:00:22,270 --> 00:00:23,390
Oh, my God.
7
00:00:24,470 --> 00:00:25,470
You remember?
8
00:00:25,510 --> 00:00:28,630
Yeah, yeah. Wow, how'd you fit five
sticks of beef jerky in that little box?
9
00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:40,760
Thank you. Oh, you're welcome.
10
00:00:42,020 --> 00:00:43,240
So, where's mine?
11
00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,000
In the driveway?
12
00:00:45,260 --> 00:00:46,260
Or the bedroom?
13
00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:50,380
Not even close. No, huh?
14
00:00:50,940 --> 00:00:52,640
Dana, you want to help me with dinner?
Sure.
15
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:53,960
Okay.
16
00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:57,840
You think she knows how much that cost?
17
00:00:58,140 --> 00:01:00,660
She will in a second. I left the price
tag on the box.
18
00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:04,680
Nice. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
19
00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:08,100
Jim remembered her anniversary and I
didn't. Meh.
20
00:01:08,430 --> 00:01:11,570
So you did one bad thing. Jim's still
ahead by 8 ,694.
21
00:01:12,930 --> 00:01:14,970
There's no way I can go out there
without a present.
22
00:01:15,930 --> 00:01:18,990
Oh, I can't believe I forgot our
anniversary.
23
00:01:19,530 --> 00:01:20,950
I can't believe you're still having
them.
24
00:01:40,910 --> 00:01:41,910
but it is from the heart.
25
00:01:42,010 --> 00:01:43,010
Happy anniversary.
26
00:01:44,990 --> 00:01:45,990
Wow.
27
00:01:46,510 --> 00:01:48,470
This is all for me? Just for you.
28
00:01:49,990 --> 00:01:51,630
Wow, look at this.
29
00:01:52,670 --> 00:01:54,290
Uh -huh.
30
00:01:54,810 --> 00:01:56,450
There I am.
31
00:01:56,670 --> 00:01:58,050
I used to be so thin.
32
00:01:58,570 --> 00:01:59,570
That's Cheryl.
33
00:01:59,830 --> 00:02:03,250
Well, we have similar features, and I
own the same tub.
34
00:02:04,430 --> 00:02:06,270
Oh, look at Kyle.
35
00:02:06,470 --> 00:02:08,389
He's so cute in his little stroller.
36
00:02:10,759 --> 00:02:11,900
happened to that stroller?
37
00:02:16,260 --> 00:02:18,320
You know, I've seen Cheryl do this
before.
38
00:02:19,660 --> 00:02:25,280
She just presses a button and the whole
thing collapses.
39
00:03:24,010 --> 00:03:25,950
We're not the most graceful family. No.
40
00:03:26,310 --> 00:03:31,130
Oh, I remember my first dance recital. I
was nine, and I danced just...
41
00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:58,500
great. Yeah.
42
00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:15,760
thing. I just finished gutting a fish.
43
00:05:16,420 --> 00:05:19,800
That's my wife. Hard on the bass and
easy on the eyes.
44
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,520
Cheryl, what are you doing in here
wearing that sexy outfit? You're driving
45
00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:25,520
crazy.
46
00:05:26,820 --> 00:05:29,320
Jim, it's a sweatshirt and sweatpants.
47
00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:31,760
Ponytail, ponytail.
48
00:05:34,460 --> 00:05:35,460
Cheryl,
49
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:39,540
do you want a pole to do?
50
00:05:57,200 --> 00:05:58,200
Right down the hall.
51
00:05:58,280 --> 00:06:00,080
Oh, keep talking, keep talking, keep
talking.
52
00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:02,360
Did you go to the ballet?
53
00:06:02,660 --> 00:06:06,200
Yeah, I wanted to think I was cultured
so I could tune in Tokyo, you know?
54
00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:12,600
Honey, can I talk to you in the other
room? No, I'm not going in the other
55
00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:13,600
with you.
56
00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:14,720
To talk?
57
00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:18,760
So you can appeal to my emotions? No
way, I'm smarter than that.
58
00:06:19,180 --> 00:06:20,360
I'm in the mood for a quickie.
59
00:06:33,840 --> 00:06:36,540
how much I love you, I'm giving you a
special present.
60
00:06:37,420 --> 00:06:38,420
Yes!
61
00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:41,940
No, Jim, no, no, no, no, no.
62
00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,900
Some guys can have sex when they're
upset.
63
00:06:45,420 --> 00:06:47,840
I am one of those guys.
64
00:06:49,540 --> 00:06:50,459
Where's Cheryl?
65
00:06:50,460 --> 00:06:51,460
In the bedroom.
66
00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:52,680
Yes!
67
00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:57,220
Okay, okay, here, here, here. Uh, girls,
uh, Aunt Dina's gonna take you out for
68
00:06:57,220 --> 00:06:59,300
some ice cream. Come on, go, go, go, go,
go, go. What?
69
00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:01,960
I need some alone time with your sister.
70
00:07:07,790 --> 00:07:08,790
Want to have sex?
71
00:07:10,650 --> 00:07:11,650
Yeah.
72
00:07:14,050 --> 00:07:15,050
That's good to know.
73
00:07:17,670 --> 00:07:19,690
Wow, 14 years. Yeah.
74
00:07:20,130 --> 00:07:21,990
How have you put up with me for so long?
75
00:07:22,470 --> 00:07:26,170
Truth is, I'm just too tired to start
over with anyone new.
76
00:07:30,130 --> 00:07:31,130
What's that?
77
00:07:31,510 --> 00:07:33,810
Well, I guess this is as good a time to
tell you as any.
78
00:07:34,330 --> 00:07:35,330
This is a book.
79
00:07:40,010 --> 00:07:46,990
do anything perfect i married you i'm
kidding that is
80
00:07:46,990 --> 00:07:51,550
a cheap shot cheryl i am storing that
one oh you mean where your hair used to
81
00:07:51,550 --> 00:07:57,270
come on there is a fire in this belly
yeah good luck putting that out
82
00:07:57,270 --> 00:08:03,910
hey cheryl you've got to make one of
those for us yeah we'll get right on
83
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:11,080
See, this is why better -looking guys
didn't marry you.
84
00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:18,980
Wow, look at Ruby, dressed up as a lady
pilgrim. Oh, we have had some wonderful
85
00:08:18,980 --> 00:08:21,500
Thanksgiving. Yeah, some pretty weird
ones, too.
86
00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:22,920
Okay,
87
00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:27,840
it's the first Thanksgiving, and you
turn to the pilgrims and you sing...
88
00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:32,659
and fish, corn and fish, we have brought
our favorite dish.
89
00:08:33,220 --> 00:08:34,539
Welcome to the new...
90
00:08:47,370 --> 00:08:49,550
that from, Gracie? Uncle Andy put it in.
91
00:08:51,010 --> 00:08:53,230
He said we had to send a message to
Whitey.
92
00:08:55,010 --> 00:09:00,950
Nothing like a brush with death to put
you in the mood for fine English
93
00:09:38,190 --> 00:09:40,850
pictures as me. That's because you take
up twice as much of the frame.
94
00:09:42,870 --> 00:09:47,050
Hey, hey, hey, all right. Can we just
act like adults for once? Sure.
95
00:09:50,430 --> 00:09:52,930
I'll give you five bucks if you touch
that lady's head.
96
00:10:15,020 --> 00:10:16,360
Yes, I do. Well,
97
00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:21,060
how would you feel if I pulled it up
over your head?
98
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:24,660
You wouldn't dare.
99
00:10:24,900 --> 00:10:26,240
Not in a public place.
100
00:10:55,630 --> 00:10:56,630
We'll see about that.
101
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:04,430
Well played.
102
00:11:04,990 --> 00:11:07,750
By the way, I've been spitting in your
coffee the entire cruise.
103
00:11:08,590 --> 00:11:11,350
Please, I knew you'd do that, so I've
been switching it with your coffee.
104
00:11:13,310 --> 00:11:14,310
Damn it!
105
00:11:14,510 --> 00:11:15,850
I drank my own spit.
106
00:11:33,740 --> 00:11:34,740
That's playing.
107
00:11:36,020 --> 00:11:38,140
You know what used to help me with
numbers and stuff?
108
00:11:38,660 --> 00:11:42,460
It's like a rhyme or a song or something
like that. Give me a beat. Give me a
109
00:11:42,460 --> 00:11:43,460
beat. Give me a beat.
110
00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:49,340
My name is 18.
111
00:12:02,990 --> 00:12:04,050
Sweetheart, let me help you here.
112
00:12:04,530 --> 00:12:06,130
Here, just pick it up.
113
00:12:06,790 --> 00:12:08,930
Here, just let it go.
114
00:12:11,350 --> 00:12:15,430
Now, remember, if you do a good job with
the game, I'm going to give you a whole
115
00:12:15,430 --> 00:12:16,430
dollar.
116
00:12:16,650 --> 00:12:18,190
Can I get a lollipop, too?
117
00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:21,130
All right.
118
00:12:21,670 --> 00:12:23,150
But it's going to come out of your
dollar.
119
00:12:24,890 --> 00:12:27,610
Take off your snow clothes. Come here,
Kyle. Let me take off your coat here.
120
00:12:55,400 --> 00:13:02,080
make a mess when have we ever made a
mess will you take it easy oh
121
00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:08,960
my god it's gone all right i'll get you
a
122
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:12,880
new one it's a 300 beard well i'm not
gonna pay 300
123
00:15:16,790 --> 00:15:18,070
When am I not nice?
124
00:15:19,550 --> 00:15:20,550
Please.
125
00:15:21,770 --> 00:15:25,690
And, Dana, will you ever have a baby?
Oh, of course I will, sweetie.
126
00:15:26,050 --> 00:15:28,350
But what if you don't? What did I just
say? Now get off my back.
127
00:15:28,830 --> 00:15:30,890
Hey, Jim, why don't you lie down on the
couch so we can pretend it's your
128
00:15:30,890 --> 00:15:31,890
funeral?
129
00:15:33,890 --> 00:15:36,670
Oh, no, we can't. There's too many
people here.
130
00:15:38,010 --> 00:15:40,490
You have the luxury of being yourself
because you're married beneath.
131
00:15:47,470 --> 00:15:48,730
None taken. I'm married up.
132
00:15:49,770 --> 00:15:51,930
I love our bed. I don't want to give up
our mattress.
133
00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:55,870
To be fair, she's already given up her
career, her ambition, and her dignity.
134
00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:34,560
One day she would finally screw up.
You're right again.
135
00:16:34,940 --> 00:16:37,400
Yeah, you know more about women than
anyone else.
136
00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:40,380
Yes, I have a master's degree in
chicology.
137
00:16:41,580 --> 00:16:44,320
It's not a natural thing for men to get
married.
138
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:46,260
It just isn't.
139
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:50,440
I mean, you know, it's the cave women
that came up with that.
140
00:16:51,500 --> 00:16:53,840
Because they didn't know how to start
fires, you see.
141
00:16:54,840 --> 00:16:58,280
That's the truth. And then man created
the wheel to get away.
142
00:17:00,650 --> 00:17:04,710
thing in this room that i picked not one
thing look anything there no anything
143
00:17:04,710 --> 00:17:11,250
here no look bonsai tree yours dust
ruffle yours duvet
144
00:17:11,250 --> 00:17:14,510
yours and the fact that i even know
those words makes my skin
145
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:32,760
bugs now.
146
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:38,040
Come on, all we got is we lift heavy
objects in sports.
147
00:17:38,800 --> 00:17:39,800
We have sports?
148
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:41,200
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You got sports.
149
00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:43,720
You can have your synchronized swimming.
150
00:17:45,120 --> 00:17:49,580
And that thing in the Olympics where
they, you know, dance around with a
151
00:17:49,580 --> 00:17:50,580
on a stick.
152
00:17:53,260 --> 00:17:55,700
Which, by the way, is not a sport.
153
00:17:56,800 --> 00:18:00,500
What do you mean it's not a sport? Well,
call Vegas. Put a bet on it.
154
00:18:02,050 --> 00:18:05,270
And women sometimes send some crazy
messages.
155
00:18:05,950 --> 00:18:07,750
Like your sleeve is not a Kleenex.
156
00:18:08,490 --> 00:18:09,490
Exactly!
157
00:18:10,310 --> 00:18:13,170
I'm damn lucky you're here to set me
straight. I know, that's what I've been
158
00:18:13,170 --> 00:18:14,170
telling your mother.
159
00:18:14,450 --> 00:18:18,770
Every time I screw up, we have to sit
down and have one of these feelings
160
00:18:21,050 --> 00:18:24,190
All right, but when you screw up, we
just want to let it go?
161
00:18:25,050 --> 00:18:29,110
No, I don't want to let it go. I want to
have a feelings talk right now.
162
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:33,980
I want to say the things to you that you
say to me.
163
00:18:35,220 --> 00:18:37,140
Look at me.
164
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:41,860
Look at me.
165
00:18:46,700 --> 00:18:48,160
What were you thinking?
166
00:18:51,300 --> 00:18:53,260
I am at the end of my road.
167
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:06,200
Happy anniversary.
168
00:19:06,660 --> 00:19:07,499
Thank you.
169
00:19:07,500 --> 00:19:08,500
You know what?
170
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:10,760
Honey, what are you doing?
171
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:12,100
Well, I am so ashamed.
172
00:19:12,460 --> 00:19:16,560
What? Well, you gave me a gift from the
heart, and I just went to some mall and
173
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,080
maxed out our credit card.
174
00:19:18,380 --> 00:19:22,520
Honey, I love that candle. No, sure, I
know that, but I want to make you
175
00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:23,520
something.
176
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:25,660
What? A poem.
177
00:19:28,340 --> 00:19:34,140
With eyes of blue and hair of yellow,
you made me feel like a lucky fellow.
178
00:19:34,990 --> 00:19:37,230
You cleaned the house and cooked the
food.
179
00:19:37,790 --> 00:19:40,210
Despite three kids, you still look good.
180
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:45,850
Your love for me, I've always trusted
until today.
181
00:19:46,170 --> 00:19:48,970
Because now, you are busted!
182
00:19:51,150 --> 00:19:52,150
Fine,
183
00:19:52,670 --> 00:19:55,930
fine, fine, fine. I deserve that.
184
00:19:56,430 --> 00:19:59,050
I'm an awful person. I forgot our
anniversary.
185
00:19:59,510 --> 00:20:01,930
Cheryl. How could I forget that it's a
special day?
186
00:20:02,530 --> 00:20:04,070
Cheryl, let me finish my poem.
187
00:20:05,540 --> 00:20:08,480
Our anniversary date was not on your
list.
188
00:20:09,220 --> 00:20:14,400
But the perfect gift is just one kiss.
189
00:20:57,080 --> 00:20:58,080
There.
190
00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:00,960
Oh, honey.
191
00:21:01,460 --> 00:21:02,460
Happy anniversary.
192
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:04,840
It is so beautiful, thank you.
193
00:21:05,060 --> 00:21:06,060
You're welcome.
194
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:08,160
Are there earrings to go with this?
195
00:21:08,980 --> 00:21:11,880
Uh, maybe for your birthday.
196
00:21:12,220 --> 00:21:13,119
Mm -hmm.
197
00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,080
In... August. August.
198
00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:18,600
14th. 23rd. 23rd.
15347
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