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1
00:00:03,887 --> 00:00:07,889
CBS presents this
program in color.
2
00:01:03,881 --> 00:01:06,181
How long before you can
get us out of here, Colonel?
3
00:01:06,217 --> 00:01:08,016
Eh, we've got a
bottleneck: money.
4
00:01:08,052 --> 00:01:09,517
German money?
5
00:01:09,553 --> 00:01:12,487
Yeah. You'll never make it
across Germany without marks.
6
00:01:12,522 --> 00:01:14,857
Hitler has just called in
every mark in the country
7
00:01:14,892 --> 00:01:16,191
and put out new ones.
8
00:01:16,227 --> 00:01:17,893
We got stuck with the old ones.
9
00:01:17,928 --> 00:01:19,561
Which we made.
10
00:01:19,596 --> 00:01:21,407
This is one of the
reasons he called 'em in.
11
00:01:21,431 --> 00:01:23,131
Well, so what
happens? So you wait.
12
00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:25,868
We're having new plates sent in
so we can make some new money.
13
00:01:25,903 --> 00:01:27,848
May take a week or
two. In the meantime...
14
00:01:27,872 --> 00:01:28,837
Guard coming.
15
00:01:28,873 --> 00:01:31,373
All right, into the
tunnel, everybody.
16
00:01:31,408 --> 00:01:32,474
It's only Schultz.
17
00:01:32,510 --> 00:01:34,209
Into the tunnel,
anyway. Come on.
18
00:01:34,244 --> 00:01:36,912
Come on, fast, fast, come on.
19
00:01:38,716 --> 00:01:40,426
You can't come in, Schultz.
What do you mean, I can't come in?
20
00:01:40,450 --> 00:01:42,195
We're not all decent. What do
you mean, you're not all decent?!
21
00:01:42,219 --> 00:01:43,730
We weren't expecting
anybody... Well, come on, Carter!
22
00:01:43,754 --> 00:01:45,264
You can't come in. We're
just not ready for company...
23
00:01:45,288 --> 00:01:46,566
What do you mean, you're
not ready for company?!
24
00:01:46,590 --> 00:01:47,590
I have to come in!
25
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,621
You can't barge in like this.
Something is going on in there!
26
00:01:51,645 --> 00:01:52,722
You let me in!
Nothing's going on.
27
00:01:52,746 --> 00:01:53,757
What is it? Wait a minute!
28
00:01:53,781 --> 00:01:56,915
Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!
What-what-what-what-what?
29
00:01:56,950 --> 00:02:00,285
Colonel Hogan, what is it I see?
30
00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:01,865
What is it you see, Schultz?
31
00:02:01,889 --> 00:02:04,189
I...
32
00:02:04,224 --> 00:02:06,258
see nothing.
33
00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:08,204
I'm glad you're here...
I've got some business
34
00:02:08,228 --> 00:02:09,873
I want to talk over
with you. Sit down.
35
00:02:09,897 --> 00:02:11,362
What kind of business?
36
00:02:11,398 --> 00:02:12,697
Well, you see, Schultz,
37
00:02:12,732 --> 00:02:14,377
in the currency switch-over,
38
00:02:14,401 --> 00:02:16,379
Berlin forgot to notify us.
39
00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:17,981
I'm not blaming
'em... they're busy.
40
00:02:18,005 --> 00:02:19,521
So we have a few old marks
41
00:02:19,557 --> 00:02:22,024
we thought you might exchange
through your connections.
42
00:02:22,059 --> 00:02:24,225
Colonel Hogan, it
would be worth my life.
43
00:02:24,261 --> 00:02:26,406
Just a thought. 50% off?
44
00:02:26,430 --> 00:02:28,196
They are worthless.
45
00:02:28,232 --> 00:02:30,365
I couldn't get rid
of one of them.
46
00:02:30,401 --> 00:02:31,366
Eh, forget it.
47
00:02:31,402 --> 00:02:33,035
How many do you have?
48
00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:34,736
LeBeau?
49
00:02:39,693 --> 00:02:42,561
Colonel Hogan!
50
00:02:42,596 --> 00:02:45,007
That's what we get for hoarding.
51
00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:47,499
Colonel, there's a dogfight
upstairs... American fighters!
52
00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:49,484
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
53
00:02:49,519 --> 00:02:52,554
Back! No prisoners are
allowed outside during an air raid.
54
00:02:52,590 --> 00:02:53,889
You could be shot for it.
55
00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:55,735
It's not an air raid,
Schultz... those are fighters.
56
00:02:55,759 --> 00:02:57,103
They're ours. Yeah, two of 'em!
57
00:03:01,665 --> 00:03:03,047
Wha-Wha-Wha-What are they doing?
58
00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:05,761
They're attacking a German
bomber... no, it's an armed transport.
59
00:03:05,785 --> 00:03:07,197
Get on top of
him! On top of him!
60
00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:09,365
Two airplanes cannot shoot down
61
00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:11,367
an armored transport
of the Fatherland.
62
00:03:11,391 --> 00:03:12,524
Herr Goring said so.
63
00:03:12,559 --> 00:03:14,092
You want to bet
ten dollars, Schultz?
64
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,695
Our airplanes are invincible.
65
00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:17,696
Give me two to one.
66
00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:18,697
You're on.
67
00:03:18,732 --> 00:03:20,031
All right, now, now!
68
00:03:20,066 --> 00:03:21,161
Go, go, go!
69
00:03:30,844 --> 00:03:32,543
See that?!
70
00:03:32,579 --> 00:03:36,781
All right, everybody,
back, back, back, back!
71
00:03:36,816 --> 00:03:38,716
Back up, back, back, back!
72
00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:41,052
Why is it that I always lose?
73
00:03:41,088 --> 00:03:43,388
It's not you, Schultz.
It's the Fatherland.
74
00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:45,723
Pay up, Schultz.
75
00:03:45,759 --> 00:03:48,226
Eins, zwei, Eins, zwei...
76
00:03:48,262 --> 00:03:51,229
drei, vier... Hey, hey, hold on.
77
00:03:51,265 --> 00:03:54,266
This is that old stuff.
78
00:04:07,030 --> 00:04:09,664
I agree it's undignified
for Your Highness
79
00:04:09,700 --> 00:04:11,477
to have to parachute
into Germany,
80
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,051
but I can assure
you, my dear prince,
81
00:04:13,087 --> 00:04:14,852
it was an unfortunate accident.
82
00:04:14,888 --> 00:04:18,690
The illustrious Luftwaffe
is supreme in the skies.
83
00:04:18,725 --> 00:04:21,859
Then why was I not
given proper fighter escort?
84
00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:24,707
Your government does not
think me of sufficient importance?
85
00:04:24,731 --> 00:04:26,198
Oh, no! I've talked to Berlin.
86
00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:28,866
They consider you and your
mission of vital importance.
87
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:31,369
They are going to send
another plane immediately.
88
00:04:31,405 --> 00:04:33,205
No! No more planes.
89
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:37,041
Of course, Your Highness.
I shall inform Berlin at once.
90
00:04:37,077 --> 00:04:39,211
A train, perhaps?
91
00:04:39,246 --> 00:04:41,213
A nice train?
92
00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:43,415
A choo-choo?
93
00:04:45,419 --> 00:04:50,555
Colonel Klink... I have been
educated on two continents.
94
00:04:50,591 --> 00:04:52,569
I have traveled
all over the world,
95
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,804
and I will not be patronized
96
00:04:54,828 --> 00:04:56,728
by a turnkey.
97
00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:58,230
Of course, of course.
98
00:04:58,265 --> 00:05:00,064
We cannot be disturbed!
99
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:02,167
My personal staff
car, Your Highness?
100
00:05:02,202 --> 00:05:05,003
Uh, could you leave for
Berlin in, uh, 30 minutes?
101
00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:06,682
Colonel Klink, I must protest
102
00:05:06,706 --> 00:05:08,218
your bringing this
man to Stalag 13.
103
00:05:08,242 --> 00:05:10,853
What are you doing here?
Obviously, he's a man of importance
104
00:05:10,877 --> 00:05:13,123
and his being here could
bring on further air attacks.
105
00:05:13,147 --> 00:05:14,513
Colonel Hogan, leave at once!
106
00:05:14,548 --> 00:05:18,350
Wait. I have not
been introduced.
107
00:05:18,385 --> 00:05:19,518
Oh, I am so sorry.
108
00:05:19,553 --> 00:05:21,353
Your Highness, may I
present Colonel Hogan,
109
00:05:21,388 --> 00:05:23,021
senior prisoner-of-war officer.
110
00:05:23,056 --> 00:05:25,357
Colonel Hogan, Prince Makabana.
111
00:05:25,392 --> 00:05:27,203
A great pleasure, Your Highness.
112
00:05:27,227 --> 00:05:30,373
Educated on two continents...
touchy, very touchy.
113
00:05:30,397 --> 00:05:33,365
Your Highness, may I
prepare my staff car for you?
114
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:36,000
Good idea. I hate
to be a poor host,
115
00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:37,702
but the Allies are obviously out
116
00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:39,516
to get His Highness
to abort your mission.
117
00:05:39,540 --> 00:05:42,841
Ha! The Allies know
nothing of my mission.
118
00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:45,693
Oh, come now. Even
here at Stalag 13,
119
00:05:45,729 --> 00:05:47,540
we've heard you're
going to grant the Nazis
120
00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:48,930
an air base in your country.
121
00:05:48,965 --> 00:05:50,949
It is not an air base.
122
00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:52,050
Did I say air base?
123
00:05:52,085 --> 00:05:54,152
Meant to say, uh,
submarine base.
124
00:05:55,189 --> 00:05:57,755
You have been talking!
125
00:05:57,791 --> 00:06:00,625
I didn't say a word, Your
Highness, not a word.
126
00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:03,127
Besides that, he
is a prisoner here.
127
00:06:03,163 --> 00:06:04,396
He can tell no one.
128
00:06:04,431 --> 00:06:07,799
He cannot use the
knowledge in any way.
129
00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:09,845
Colonel, I'd like to go
back to my barracks.
130
00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:12,136
I feel utterly helpless.
131
00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:16,708
Do I look like an
expert? I do not know.
132
00:06:16,743 --> 00:06:18,154
Oh, that's worse.
Are you kidding?
133
00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:19,722
There was no
pompom. That's terrible!
134
00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:21,691
All right, all right,
all right, knock it off.
135
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:23,526
That's not bad, not bad at all.
136
00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:25,495
If you could look a
little more regal, Kinch,
137
00:06:25,519 --> 00:06:27,197
I think you'd look
just like the Prince.
138
00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:29,521
Regal? Colonel, you're
talking to a guy from Detroit
139
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,367
who used to work for
the telephone company.
140
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,535
Well, that's an empire.
141
00:06:32,559 --> 00:06:33,803
How's the hat coming?
142
00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:35,493
Oh, they can't agree
what it looks like.
143
00:06:35,529 --> 00:06:36,806
No, we can't. Oh, don't worry.
144
00:06:36,830 --> 00:06:38,208
We'll grab the
Prince's later on.
145
00:06:38,232 --> 00:06:40,276
Hurry it up anyway... you
have about five minutes.
146
00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:42,078
Look, what do I do? I
mean, what do I say?
147
00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:43,435
How does an African prince act?
148
00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:45,548
Uh, nasty. At
least this one does,
149
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,049
and don't worry, I'll
be with you anyway.
150
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:49,051
Colonel, I don't know. I
don't think I ought to... Kinch!
151
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:52,543
There are 15 men down below
who can't get out without money,
152
00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:54,023
and you're going
to get it for us.
153
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:57,115
You really think I could
pass for this prince, huh?
154
00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:58,383
You're perfect.
155
00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:01,286
Just one thing: the mustache.
156
00:07:01,321 --> 00:07:03,304
My mustache?
157
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,808
Oh, no.
158
00:07:07,844 --> 00:07:10,489
Colonel, do you know how
long it took me to grow this?
159
00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:12,075
Kinch, I've been
meaning to tell you.
160
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:13,576
You're much
handsomer without it.
161
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,833
Ooh, ten years younger.
162
00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:17,002
Beautiful, beautiful.
163
00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:18,347
Yeah, we'll save it for you.
164
00:07:18,371 --> 00:07:20,505
I promise.
165
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:22,980
Put your hands down there.
166
00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:26,678
My personal staff
car, Your Highness,
167
00:07:26,713 --> 00:07:28,980
and I can guarantee
a completely safe trip
168
00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:30,331
to Berlin.
169
00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:31,866
I would hope so.
170
00:07:31,902 --> 00:07:35,102
Sergeant Schultz.
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant!
171
00:07:40,410 --> 00:07:42,176
Drive on.
172
00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:43,895
Drive on!
173
00:07:46,767 --> 00:07:49,233
What's the matter,
Schultz? Drive on!
174
00:07:54,073 --> 00:07:58,677
I beg to report, Herr
Kommandant, th-th-th-th-that...
175
00:08:03,684 --> 00:08:05,517
I have changed my mind.
176
00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:07,084
But-but, Your Highness,
177
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,953
is there something
wrong with the staff car?
178
00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:11,823
Why should Prince
Makabana go to Berlin?
179
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:14,492
Yes, that's a very
good question.
180
00:08:14,528 --> 00:08:19,163
Why? But then again, why not?
181
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:22,500
Let Berlin come to
Prince Makabana.
182
00:08:22,536 --> 00:08:24,001
Drive on.
183
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:25,002
Drive on!
184
00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:27,855
Drive on?
185
00:08:32,162 --> 00:08:33,494
You will call Berlin
186
00:08:33,529 --> 00:08:36,064
and have them send
their negotiator at once.
187
00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:37,598
Yes, Your Highness, at once.
188
00:08:37,633 --> 00:08:40,179
And have him bring
plenty of negotiating papers.
189
00:08:40,203 --> 00:08:41,502
Paper?
190
00:08:41,537 --> 00:08:43,938
Yes, the green
kind... that rustles.
191
00:08:43,974 --> 00:08:45,139
Oh, yes, yes, of course.
192
00:08:45,175 --> 00:08:46,552
Your Highness, there's
something important
193
00:08:46,576 --> 00:08:48,687
I want to talk to you about...
Not now, Hogan. There is no time.
194
00:08:48,711 --> 00:08:49,677
All right. Wait.
195
00:08:49,712 --> 00:08:51,012
Wait?
196
00:08:51,047 --> 00:08:56,184
I thought there was something
familiar about this man.
197
00:08:56,219 --> 00:08:57,518
Hogan?
198
00:08:57,553 --> 00:08:58,853
Robert Hogan.
199
00:08:58,888 --> 00:09:01,133
Of course.
200
00:09:01,157 --> 00:09:03,436
I went to school with
this man in America.
201
00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:05,371
You've changed. You
had a mustache then.
202
00:09:05,395 --> 00:09:06,861
Don't remind me.
203
00:09:06,896 --> 00:09:08,129
The grip, huh?
204
00:09:08,164 --> 00:09:09,964
Sock, sock, boom, bow!
205
00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:14,135
It's a small world. Small world.
206
00:09:14,170 --> 00:09:17,305
Free this man at once!
207
00:09:17,340 --> 00:09:19,974
Your Highness, I cannot do that.
208
00:09:20,010 --> 00:09:22,043
There are rules of war.
209
00:09:22,078 --> 00:09:24,345
Don't bother. I had
no place to go anyway.
210
00:09:24,398 --> 00:09:26,330
Then you shall stay with me.
211
00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:29,133
You have private quarters here?
212
00:09:29,168 --> 00:09:30,502
Of course, Your Highness.
213
00:09:30,537 --> 00:09:32,637
You are my personal guest.
214
00:09:32,672 --> 00:09:34,639
But you are not mine.
215
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:37,854
You will move your
things out immediately
216
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:39,744
and move Colonel Hogan in.
217
00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:43,415
Yes, Your Highness. Schultz!
218
00:09:43,450 --> 00:09:45,511
Schultz, not the big
things, just the small things,
219
00:09:45,535 --> 00:09:48,002
and throw out all of Klink's
paintings... they're terrible.
220
00:09:48,038 --> 00:09:50,838
You remember the night
of the Notre Dame game?
221
00:09:50,873 --> 00:09:53,508
Oh, ho, do I... and the house
detective at the Plaza Hotel?
222
00:09:53,543 --> 00:09:55,676
Hey, I wanted to
talk to you about that.
223
00:09:55,711 --> 00:09:58,151
That was the greatest
party I've ever...
224
00:10:00,216 --> 00:10:03,351
Schultz... sometimes in war,
225
00:10:03,386 --> 00:10:07,021
one is forced into...
strange positions.
226
00:10:07,057 --> 00:10:09,690
Oh, boy...
227
00:10:09,725 --> 00:10:12,226
Herr Kommandant.
228
00:10:15,565 --> 00:10:18,044
You handled it like
a master, Kinch.
229
00:10:18,068 --> 00:10:19,700
Uh, I don't know, Colonel.
230
00:10:19,735 --> 00:10:22,548
I'm telling you, don't go back to
the phone company after the war.
231
00:10:22,572 --> 00:10:24,405
Get a job as a prince.
232
00:10:24,441 --> 00:10:25,406
Ah.
233
00:10:25,459 --> 00:10:27,236
Hey, how do you
like that beast Klink?
234
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:29,739
Look, his wine cellar is
almost as good as ours.
235
00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:32,396
Pour a little bit more for
His Highness, will you?
236
00:10:32,432 --> 00:10:34,065
His Highness?
237
00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:36,067
Maintenant, chien!
238
00:10:38,104 --> 00:10:40,237
LeBeau. LeBeau!
239
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,941
You heard the prince.
240
00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,278
Prince.
241
00:10:50,951 --> 00:10:53,751
I may even get to like this.
242
00:10:55,689 --> 00:10:57,238
Come in.
243
00:10:57,273 --> 00:10:59,573
Everything to Your
Highness' satisfaction?
244
00:10:59,609 --> 00:11:02,410
A little cramped, but not bad.
245
00:11:02,445 --> 00:11:05,530
Good. Good.
246
00:11:05,565 --> 00:11:07,164
My best wine.
247
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:08,515
It's an amusing little wine,
248
00:11:08,551 --> 00:11:10,262
but, of course,
completely incompetent.
249
00:11:10,286 --> 00:11:12,603
That puts it rather well.
250
00:11:12,638 --> 00:11:14,605
Oh, yes, completely incompetent.
251
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:16,341
Thanks for stopping by.
252
00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:18,542
Not at all.
253
00:11:18,578 --> 00:11:21,545
Ah, what am I doing?
I just talked to Berlin.
254
00:11:21,581 --> 00:11:24,282
They're sending Count Von Sichel
to negotiate with His Highness.
255
00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:25,283
He's on his way already.
256
00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:27,952
Ah, good. You may go.
257
00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:29,721
Thank you. Thank you.
258
00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:32,056
Oh, what am I doing?
259
00:11:32,091 --> 00:11:34,392
The best news of all: your
wife has arrived in Berlin,
260
00:11:34,427 --> 00:11:36,293
and she's coming here
with Count Von Sichel.
261
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:37,195
My what?
262
00:11:37,230 --> 00:11:37,979
His what?
263
00:11:38,014 --> 00:11:40,047
Your wife, Your Highness.
264
00:11:40,083 --> 00:11:42,549
I hope that my, uh,
bachelor quarters
265
00:11:42,585 --> 00:11:45,619
are large enough
for domestic bliss.
266
00:11:51,194 --> 00:11:53,895
Oh, that's just fine. My wife.
267
00:11:53,930 --> 00:11:55,963
What do we do now, Colonel?
268
00:11:55,999 --> 00:11:58,950
How should I know?
You're the prince.
269
00:12:06,376 --> 00:12:08,321
Look, Colonel, why
don't we do this?
270
00:12:08,345 --> 00:12:09,922
We'll bring up the real Prince
271
00:12:09,946 --> 00:12:10,911
from the tunnel,
272
00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:12,525
tell him it was
all a big mistake
273
00:12:12,549 --> 00:12:14,059
and then let him take my place.
274
00:12:14,083 --> 00:12:15,683
I think you've got it.
275
00:12:15,719 --> 00:12:18,285
And when he tells Klink
what's going on down below,
276
00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:19,754
Hitler gives us all a medal.
277
00:12:22,459 --> 00:12:23,958
How 'bout some more champagne?
278
00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:25,170
Forget it! Forget it!
279
00:12:25,194 --> 00:12:27,161
It was just an idea.
280
00:12:27,196 --> 00:12:29,408
Come on, Colonel, you
always got some kind
281
00:12:29,432 --> 00:12:31,544
of an idea you can
pull out of the hat.
282
00:12:31,568 --> 00:12:32,533
Yeah.
283
00:12:32,569 --> 00:12:33,534
Well, I haven't.
284
00:12:33,570 --> 00:12:34,935
LeBeau, get over to the barracks
285
00:12:34,971 --> 00:12:36,136
and have everybody stand by
286
00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:37,505
to move out through the tunnel.
287
00:12:37,540 --> 00:12:39,540
This could be the end
of our whole operation.
288
00:12:39,576 --> 00:12:40,908
How 'bout you and Kinch?
289
00:12:40,943 --> 00:12:42,377
We'll stay and play for a break.
290
00:12:42,412 --> 00:12:43,678
If they grab us, don't wait.
291
00:12:44,714 --> 00:12:46,414
Out.
292
00:12:46,449 --> 00:12:47,548
Come in.
293
00:12:49,569 --> 00:12:51,603
They have arrived,
Your Highness.
294
00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:52,681
May I present
295
00:12:52,705 --> 00:12:54,139
Count Von Sichel.
296
00:12:57,343 --> 00:12:58,587
And, uh,
297
00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:00,678
Princess Yawanda,
you know, of course.
298
00:13:20,816 --> 00:13:22,750
How are you, Maka?
299
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:26,921
Uh, just fine.
300
00:13:26,956 --> 00:13:28,656
I think.
301
00:13:28,691 --> 00:13:30,958
Well, champagne for everybody.
302
00:13:30,993 --> 00:13:32,204
Who is this?
303
00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:33,428
Oh, this is Colonel Hogan,
304
00:13:33,463 --> 00:13:35,007
whose relationship
to His Highness
305
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:37,043
I tried to explain to
you, Your Excellency.
306
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,732
Oh, yes. Charmed.
307
00:13:38,768 --> 00:13:40,768
Pleasure to do
business with you.
308
00:13:40,803 --> 00:13:42,170
Come, Maka.
309
00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,708
Um, uh, where are we going?
310
00:13:47,743 --> 00:13:49,727
Yeah, where are you going?
311
00:13:49,762 --> 00:13:52,308
Why, I have not seen my
husband for two months.
312
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:53,676
There have been too many delays.
313
00:13:53,700 --> 00:13:55,344
Our submarines are
now awaiting orders
314
00:13:55,368 --> 00:13:56,712
to put in to your capitol city.
315
00:13:56,736 --> 00:13:58,602
Count, just explain it
to the men on the subs,
316
00:13:58,638 --> 00:13:59,603
they'll understand.
317
00:13:59,639 --> 00:14:00,604
Take as long as you want.
318
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,807
Thanks.
319
00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:07,428
Hello.
320
00:14:09,132 --> 00:14:10,798
Whoever you are.
321
00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:13,767
Hi.
322
00:14:13,803 --> 00:14:15,381
You know, you do look like him.
323
00:14:15,405 --> 00:14:17,438
The Big Prince.
324
00:14:17,474 --> 00:14:19,740
Uh, well, he's all
right, you know?
325
00:14:19,775 --> 00:14:21,642
If you're worried about him.
326
00:14:21,677 --> 00:14:23,394
Not terribly.
327
00:14:23,430 --> 00:14:26,897
Lady, fencing's not my sport.
328
00:14:26,933 --> 00:14:30,268
Now, your husband was
trying to make a deal for himself.
329
00:14:30,303 --> 00:14:32,570
I'm trying to make
a deal for the Allies.
330
00:14:32,606 --> 00:14:35,139
Which side are you on?
331
00:14:35,174 --> 00:14:37,475
My own.
332
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,279
And so are you.
333
00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:43,514
And so are they.
334
00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:46,951
And everyone else.
335
00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:53,524
Okay, blow the whistle.
336
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,410
Well...
337
00:14:56,446 --> 00:14:59,813
you come on real strong.
338
00:14:59,849 --> 00:15:03,083
Or do you only look strong?
339
00:15:04,954 --> 00:15:07,288
You know, I always
get hung up on looks.
340
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:09,023
All right, let's make a date
341
00:15:09,058 --> 00:15:11,392
for after the war and
compare hang-ups,
342
00:15:11,427 --> 00:15:14,495
but for right now, my
neck is sticking out a mile
343
00:15:14,531 --> 00:15:17,632
and I got to know...
Which side are you on?
344
00:15:19,068 --> 00:15:22,537
That's a way to
talk to a Princess?
345
00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:27,141
We are wasting time!
346
00:15:27,177 --> 00:15:29,510
These arrangements must be made
347
00:15:29,546 --> 00:15:31,212
and they must be made now.
348
00:15:31,247 --> 00:15:33,514
We have subs waiting
to come into port,
349
00:15:33,550 --> 00:15:35,461
and we have planes
waiting to take off
350
00:15:35,485 --> 00:15:37,062
with supplies for the subs now!
351
00:15:37,086 --> 00:15:38,352
Don't bend our money.
352
00:15:39,922 --> 00:15:43,123
I have made you my
finest offer, and you refuse.
353
00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:45,926
And a very generous
one, too, Your Excellency.
354
00:15:45,961 --> 00:15:48,396
I just don't know if
we can do business.
355
00:15:48,431 --> 00:15:49,397
Why not?
356
00:15:49,432 --> 00:15:50,898
Well, Herr Hitler has made
357
00:15:50,934 --> 00:15:53,868
some pretty nasty remarks
about my people, you know.
358
00:15:53,903 --> 00:15:55,286
He was misquoted.
359
00:15:55,322 --> 00:15:57,355
He loves your people.
360
00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:58,522
Oh, yes!
361
00:15:58,558 --> 00:16:00,658
Always singing and dancing.
362
00:16:00,693 --> 00:16:02,526
Oh, he loves them!
363
00:16:03,947 --> 00:16:05,379
Klink, stay out of this!
364
00:16:05,414 --> 00:16:06,948
What did I say?
365
00:16:06,983 --> 00:16:09,194
It's not that His
Highness is greedy,
366
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:11,329
he just has to
think of the future.
367
00:16:11,353 --> 00:16:14,572
What job security does he
have if you should lose the war?
368
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:17,342
It is impossible for
us to lose the war.
369
00:16:17,377 --> 00:16:19,205
The Fuehrer is invincible.
370
00:16:19,229 --> 00:16:20,839
Then why does the
Fuehrer need me?
371
00:16:20,863 --> 00:16:21,745
He loves you.
372
00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:23,214
Yes.
373
00:16:23,249 --> 00:16:29,620
400,000 marks, and that
is my absolute top offer.
374
00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:30,971
Do you think His Highness
375
00:16:31,006 --> 00:16:34,074
would compromise his
integrity for 400,000 marks?
376
00:16:34,110 --> 00:16:36,076
Make it six.
377
00:16:36,112 --> 00:16:38,078
500,000 marks.
378
00:16:38,114 --> 00:16:39,647
That's all I have here.
379
00:16:39,682 --> 00:16:41,215
I hope it's in new currency.
380
00:16:41,251 --> 00:16:42,251
Naturally.
381
00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:46,404
Prince Makabana agrees.
382
00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:47,405
Good.
383
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:48,406
Good. Good. Good.
384
00:16:48,441 --> 00:16:49,707
Notify your country immediately
385
00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:51,787
to prepare for our
submarines and supply planes.
386
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:54,612
After you fly the Prince
and Princess home.
387
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,614
Now.
388
00:16:58,334 --> 00:16:59,767
Pick up the phone.
389
00:16:59,802 --> 00:17:01,302
Don't you trust us?
390
00:17:01,337 --> 00:17:02,403
Of course.
391
00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:04,600
After I learn our
submarines are safely in port,
392
00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:06,057
you will be permitted to leave.
393
00:17:06,092 --> 00:17:07,225
In the meantime, Klink,
394
00:17:07,260 --> 00:17:09,427
they are to be kept
in protective custody.
395
00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:10,895
Of course, Your Excellency!
396
00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:12,041
Wait a minute.
397
00:17:12,065 --> 00:17:13,492
It's against the
Geneva Convention
398
00:17:13,516 --> 00:17:14,749
to keep a prisoner prisoner.
399
00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:17,301
About you, I care nothing.
400
00:17:17,336 --> 00:17:19,003
Now.
401
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:21,522
I, uh, I don't suppose
that you're familiar
402
00:17:21,557 --> 00:17:24,091
with the language of
His Highness' country?
403
00:17:24,127 --> 00:17:25,660
Since they are remaining here,
404
00:17:25,695 --> 00:17:28,029
until I learn all is
well, it does not matter.
405
00:17:28,064 --> 00:17:29,730
Well, it does to us.
406
00:17:31,634 --> 00:17:33,934
I believe, because
of the Prince's
407
00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:35,803
well-known moral scruples,
408
00:17:35,838 --> 00:17:39,140
he would prefer the
Princess to make the call.
409
00:17:41,444 --> 00:17:46,180
And, if the Princess
doesn't prefer?
410
00:17:46,215 --> 00:17:49,183
Then I think we are in trouble.
411
00:17:56,426 --> 00:17:57,391
How's it going, Carter?
412
00:17:57,427 --> 00:17:58,392
Oh, just about finished.
413
00:17:58,428 --> 00:18:00,071
Hurry it up. We
haven't got much time.
414
00:18:00,095 --> 00:18:01,340
Colonel? Yeah?
415
00:18:01,364 --> 00:18:02,608
Now, what about the money?
416
00:18:02,632 --> 00:18:04,532
You're going to have it
by the bale, Lieutenant,
417
00:18:04,567 --> 00:18:05,833
in about 20 minutes.
418
00:18:05,868 --> 00:18:07,635
Come on, LeBeau,
hurry it up, will you?
419
00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:09,648
You and Carter get
over to the motor pool,
420
00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:10,638
get Klink's staff car.
421
00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:11,684
Be in German uniforms.
422
00:18:11,708 --> 00:18:12,673
Right, Colonel.
423
00:18:12,709 --> 00:18:13,719
Newkirk, you know what to do.
424
00:18:13,743 --> 00:18:14,709
Righto, Colonel.
425
00:18:14,744 --> 00:18:15,710
All right, look.
426
00:18:15,745 --> 00:18:17,545
You get on the
wiretap to Klink's office.
427
00:18:17,580 --> 00:18:18,912
When they get
word we've clobbered
428
00:18:18,948 --> 00:18:19,913
their subs and planes
429
00:18:19,949 --> 00:18:21,549
call the main gate
and get it opened.
430
00:18:21,584 --> 00:18:22,550
Jawohl!
431
00:18:22,585 --> 00:18:23,829
This is Kommandant Klink.
432
00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:26,097
I want the main
gate open at once.
433
00:18:26,121 --> 00:18:28,055
Terrible, terrible.
434
00:18:28,090 --> 00:18:30,624
You said we were all
going out the tunnel.
435
00:18:30,660 --> 00:18:32,003
That's another one
of our operations.
436
00:18:32,027 --> 00:18:32,993
They'll be so busy here,
437
00:18:33,028 --> 00:18:34,362
you'll be able to
get away clean.
438
00:18:34,397 --> 00:18:35,629
All right, everybody, all set?
439
00:18:35,665 --> 00:18:38,566
I demand immediate release.
440
00:18:38,601 --> 00:18:40,801
After the way you
double-crossed the Germans?
441
00:18:40,837 --> 00:18:42,536
They'd kill you.
442
00:18:42,572 --> 00:18:45,439
Get down and stay
down and that's an order.
443
00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:52,012
Hi, Schultz.
444
00:18:52,047 --> 00:18:53,146
Halt!
445
00:18:53,182 --> 00:18:54,515
Who goes there?
446
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:55,794
Rudolf Hess.
447
00:18:55,818 --> 00:18:58,786
I'm on a special mission.
448
00:18:58,821 --> 00:19:00,921
The Prince and the Princess
449
00:19:00,956 --> 00:19:02,723
are not to leave without
450
00:19:02,759 --> 00:19:04,958
Kommandant Klink's
express permission.
451
00:19:04,994 --> 00:19:06,204
He hasn't told you yet?
452
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:07,194
Told me what?
453
00:19:07,229 --> 00:19:08,907
He's sending his
staff car for them.
454
00:19:08,931 --> 00:19:09,997
They are not to leave
455
00:19:10,032 --> 00:19:12,332
without Kommandant
Klink's express permission.
456
00:19:12,368 --> 00:19:13,579
You're a good soldier, Schultz,
457
00:19:13,603 --> 00:19:14,883
but here it comes.
458
00:19:18,007 --> 00:19:18,973
Oh, Your Highness.
459
00:19:19,008 --> 00:19:20,008
Please, Your Highness.
460
00:19:20,042 --> 00:19:23,244
You have to understand
it is not up to me.
461
00:19:23,279 --> 00:19:25,413
Oh, I'd just as well
take orders from you
462
00:19:25,448 --> 00:19:26,747
than from anybody else...
463
00:19:26,783 --> 00:19:28,516
I love to take orders...
464
00:19:28,551 --> 00:19:32,152
But my orders are
for you not to depart.
465
00:19:32,187 --> 00:19:34,488
You are giving orders to me?
466
00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:36,641
Oh, Your Highness, please.
467
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:39,810
I have the highest
respect for royalty.
468
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:43,180
Oh, things were so much
happier here in Germany
469
00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:45,917
when we had an Emperor.
470
00:19:45,952 --> 00:19:47,552
What am I saying?
471
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:48,952
You're perfectly right, Schultz.
472
00:19:48,988 --> 00:19:49,954
I am?
473
00:19:49,989 --> 00:19:51,099
Yeah, I tell you what.
474
00:19:51,123 --> 00:19:52,423
His Highness and the Princess
475
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:53,624
will wait in the staff car
476
00:19:53,660 --> 00:19:55,171
until you get the
word from Klink,
477
00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:57,395
which, uh, should
be any minute now.
478
00:19:57,430 --> 00:19:59,747
Oh, Colonel Hogan,
I'm so grateful.
479
00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:01,916
Please, Your Highness, allow me.
480
00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:04,017
Please, please, Your Highness.
481
00:20:06,823 --> 00:20:09,289
Thanks.
482
00:20:09,325 --> 00:20:13,060
The boys up front will
take you out of camp
483
00:20:13,095 --> 00:20:15,062
and pass you on
to the underground.
484
00:20:15,097 --> 00:20:16,775
You'll make it out
of Germany okay,
485
00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:17,832
and back to the States.
486
00:20:17,867 --> 00:20:18,833
And you?
487
00:20:18,868 --> 00:20:20,568
Me?
488
00:20:20,603 --> 00:20:23,070
I'm here for the duration.
489
00:20:23,105 --> 00:20:27,207
Oh, might be a real
ball if we went together.
490
00:20:27,242 --> 00:20:28,943
What about your husband?
491
00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:31,979
I thought you asked
me which side I was on.
492
00:20:32,014 --> 00:20:34,448
And I thought I
gave you an answer.
493
00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:38,452
Yeah, well, Africa's a
long way from Detroit.
494
00:20:38,488 --> 00:20:40,955
I was from Cleveland.
495
00:20:42,725 --> 00:20:44,725
I'll meet you halfway...
496
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:46,159
in Toledo?
497
00:20:46,195 --> 00:20:48,562
To compare hang-ups?
498
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:52,550
Lovely couple, Schultz.
499
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:55,686
Beautiful, and so regal.
500
00:20:58,258 --> 00:20:59,240
And, uh...
501
00:20:59,275 --> 00:21:00,953
shall we drink, Your Excellency,
502
00:21:00,977 --> 00:21:02,754
to a most successful
negotiation?
503
00:21:02,778 --> 00:21:04,111
Merely routine.
504
00:21:04,146 --> 00:21:05,190
Ah, I would think not.
505
00:21:05,214 --> 00:21:06,591
I would even dare to presume
506
00:21:06,615 --> 00:21:08,393
that there might
be a reward waiting
507
00:21:08,417 --> 00:21:10,729
for Your Excellency
when you return to Berlin.
508
00:21:10,753 --> 00:21:12,319
It is possible.
509
00:21:12,355 --> 00:21:13,854
Thank you, my dear.
510
00:21:13,890 --> 00:21:15,600
And, uh, if you should
have the occasion
511
00:21:15,624 --> 00:21:18,092
to mention my participation,
Klink is spelled with a "K"
512
00:21:18,127 --> 00:21:20,460
and there is no "c" between
the "n" and the last "k".
513
00:21:22,064 --> 00:21:24,965
Stalag 13. Yes.
514
00:21:25,001 --> 00:21:27,434
Berlin calling, Your Excellency.
515
00:21:27,469 --> 00:21:29,370
Danke.
516
00:21:29,405 --> 00:21:32,539
The submarines are in port.
517
00:21:32,574 --> 00:21:35,742
Von Sichel speaking.
518
00:21:35,778 --> 00:21:38,345
What?
519
00:21:38,381 --> 00:21:39,846
Impossible.
520
00:21:39,882 --> 00:21:42,383
What?
521
00:21:42,418 --> 00:21:47,288
But I... but, uh...
522
00:21:47,323 --> 00:21:49,589
Hello? Hello?
523
00:21:49,625 --> 00:21:52,359
What's the matter,
Your Excellency?
524
00:21:52,395 --> 00:21:53,961
Our gallant submarines
525
00:21:53,996 --> 00:21:56,375
were met by Allied
destroyers and sunk.
526
00:21:56,399 --> 00:21:57,876
Our gallant supply planes
527
00:21:57,900 --> 00:21:59,811
were ambushed
by Allied fighters.
528
00:21:59,835 --> 00:22:03,337
And Berlin is going
to have me shot.
529
00:22:03,372 --> 00:22:06,040
We've been betrayed.
530
00:22:09,428 --> 00:22:11,173
This is Kommandant Klink.
531
00:22:11,197 --> 00:22:15,399
Open the main gates
for my staff car at once.
532
00:22:15,434 --> 00:22:18,102
Heil Hitler.
533
00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:24,191
Excuse me, uh, Your Highness.
534
00:22:27,513 --> 00:22:29,513
Toledo?
535
00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:50,017
There is something
about royalty.
536
00:22:50,052 --> 00:22:52,819
I can tell a prince a mile away.
537
00:22:52,855 --> 00:22:55,622
You are not allowed to be
out of the barracks at night.
538
00:22:55,657 --> 00:22:57,124
Go back at once!
539
00:22:57,159 --> 00:22:58,492
Sure, Schultz.
540
00:22:58,527 --> 00:22:59,604
I just wanted to tell you
541
00:22:59,628 --> 00:23:01,906
that I just saw the Prince
walking over that way.
542
00:23:01,930 --> 00:23:04,264
B-B-But that's impossible.
543
00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:05,932
He's in the car.
544
00:23:05,968 --> 00:23:07,968
You know, I thought there
was somebody missing.
545
00:23:14,910 --> 00:23:16,643
Excuse me.
546
00:23:17,980 --> 00:23:20,414
W-Where-W-Where is he?
547
00:23:20,449 --> 00:23:22,694
He's over that way, there.
548
00:23:22,718 --> 00:23:25,185
Oh, Your Highness,
please come back!
549
00:23:25,221 --> 00:23:27,587
Your Highness, please come back!
550
00:23:27,623 --> 00:23:29,289
Straight out the front gate.
551
00:23:32,128 --> 00:23:34,861
Halt! Halt! Stop
them! Stop them!
552
00:23:34,897 --> 00:23:36,630
Schultz! Come back here!
553
00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,399
Come back here!
554
00:23:38,434 --> 00:23:40,934
Schultz! Come back here!
555
00:23:40,969 --> 00:23:42,569
Come back here!
556
00:23:44,206 --> 00:23:46,340
Um, what's "Toledo"?
557
00:23:46,375 --> 00:23:49,243
Well, after the war, Colonel,
558
00:23:49,278 --> 00:23:51,845
it could be quite a spot.
559
00:23:59,071 --> 00:24:01,016
But, Colonel Hogan, I protest.
560
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:02,317
You have offered to save me,
561
00:24:02,341 --> 00:24:04,119
but you have not
given me enough money
562
00:24:04,143 --> 00:24:05,476
to get to Switzerland.
563
00:24:05,511 --> 00:24:07,545
Maybe you can make it to Berlin?
564
00:24:07,580 --> 00:24:08,860
Forget it.
565
00:24:11,283 --> 00:24:12,316
Get a move on.
566
00:24:12,351 --> 00:24:14,151
This way, Your Majesty.
567
00:24:14,186 --> 00:24:15,986
All right, now, down that hole.
568
00:24:16,021 --> 00:24:18,066
Some day, I shall relate
569
00:24:18,090 --> 00:24:19,935
all that has
happened to me here.
570
00:24:19,959 --> 00:24:21,592
You do that, Prince.
571
00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:25,329
And, my loyal subjects
shall take their revenge.
572
00:24:25,364 --> 00:24:27,565
If you can find any, yes.
573
00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:29,567
Get down there.
574
00:24:35,007 --> 00:24:37,675
Wonder what she saw in him?
575
00:24:37,710 --> 00:24:39,076
I don't know, Kinch.
576
00:24:39,111 --> 00:24:41,912
Some women just have
peculiar taste in men.
40069
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