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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,820 --> 00:00:05,160 Oh, my God, the heat. 2 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:08,039 When is Jim going to be done fixing the air conditioner? 3 00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:09,720 Oh, soon, I hope. 4 00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:11,680 Mommy, is this what hell is like? 5 00:00:13,640 --> 00:00:15,720 No, honey, there's no popsicles there. 6 00:00:17,540 --> 00:00:18,940 Oh, man. 7 00:00:19,740 --> 00:00:25,580 All right. 8 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:28,620 No worries. 9 00:00:29,100 --> 00:00:31,740 The A .C. is fixed. We're in business. 10 00:00:53,130 --> 00:00:55,350 And while we're at it, why don't we get a brand new house? 11 00:00:56,950 --> 00:00:58,330 Can we live by the lake? 12 00:00:58,970 --> 00:01:02,790 Yes. And we'll have a butler, and you'll ride dolphins to school. 13 00:01:03,930 --> 00:01:04,930 Yay! 14 00:01:06,050 --> 00:01:07,590 All right, you know what? I'm starting to get worried. 15 00:01:08,150 --> 00:01:10,110 These girls should be getting sarcasm by now. 16 00:01:11,670 --> 00:01:16,530 Okay, you guys, plan B. Let's all head over to my house. I got a brand new A 17 00:01:16,530 --> 00:01:18,730 unit. Four zones. You can hang meat in there. 18 00:01:19,030 --> 00:01:20,150 Plan C. 19 00:01:21,390 --> 00:01:24,060 I took... Parts out of yours to fix mine. 20 00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:28,360 And they kind of melted. 21 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:32,300 That's funny. You know, they're not interchangeable. 22 00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:34,220 Well, no harm, no foul. 23 00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:35,440 No, no, no, Jim. 24 00:01:35,940 --> 00:01:37,360 Giant stinky foul. 25 00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:42,040 I need my central air. I'm a husky guy. I cheat. 26 00:01:43,060 --> 00:01:46,720 You guys are a bunch of wimps. In my day, air conditioning was jumping on the 27 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:49,900 family car, holding on to the luggage rack, and ducking for bridges. 28 00:01:51,380 --> 00:01:54,600 Oh, that's right. I forgot about your summer vacations with the Flintstones. 29 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:55,600 come on. 30 00:01:56,060 --> 00:01:59,300 All right, I can't take it anymore. I'm going back to my neighborhood where at 31 00:01:59,300 --> 00:02:00,960 least the guys dressed like that are in love. 32 00:02:08,660 --> 00:02:09,880 You do look kind of gay. 33 00:02:10,100 --> 00:02:11,100 Me? 34 00:02:50,410 --> 00:02:51,410 This is ridiculous. 35 00:02:51,670 --> 00:02:55,250 I haven't slept in three days. Come on. You've got to take us to a hotel or 36 00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:56,250 something. 37 00:02:56,270 --> 00:02:57,270 Jim, 38 00:03:10,650 --> 00:03:12,290 what are you doing? 39 00:03:12,570 --> 00:03:13,650 I'm doing the backstroke. 40 00:03:14,210 --> 00:03:15,310 You want to see my butterfly? 41 00:03:16,310 --> 00:03:19,390 No. Get out of there. That's not our pool. 42 00:03:20,170 --> 00:03:22,130 Come on, Negans are gone for at least a week. 43 00:03:22,750 --> 00:03:25,230 It's the least they can do. We're picking up their mail. 44 00:03:25,450 --> 00:03:27,390 We? I'm bringing in their mail. 45 00:03:27,670 --> 00:03:30,470 The only thing you ever did for them was hose off their house after you threw an 46 00:03:30,470 --> 00:03:31,469 egg at it. 47 00:03:31,470 --> 00:03:35,370 I did not throw an egg at their house. I threw it at the wind chimes. 48 00:03:35,650 --> 00:03:38,070 Those gentle tones are really pissing me off. 49 00:03:39,370 --> 00:03:42,510 Lois and Dutch asked me to bring in their mail because I have a reputation 50 00:03:42,510 --> 00:03:43,650 very reliable person. 51 00:03:44,110 --> 00:03:46,130 Yes, and I am the neighborhood scam. 52 00:03:47,630 --> 00:03:48,710 Care to join me? 53 00:03:50,860 --> 00:03:52,360 The vegans never said we could use their pool. 54 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:53,600 They never said we could. 55 00:03:54,460 --> 00:03:59,600 Look, if they knew how hot it was, they would have insisted that we swim. 56 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,780 You know what a great guy Butch is? 57 00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:04,200 Dutch. Butch Dutch. 58 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:06,940 I don't know his Irish name. It's all sound alike to me. 59 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,080 Care to join me? 60 00:04:11,100 --> 00:04:12,100 Now jump in. 61 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:15,960 Yeah. 62 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:19,360 Refreshing, huh? 63 00:04:19,690 --> 00:04:20,930 Your body will thank you. 64 00:04:21,570 --> 00:04:22,970 And I'll thank you. 65 00:04:23,550 --> 00:04:25,250 You know what I'm saying? 66 00:04:26,090 --> 00:04:27,570 I always know what you're saying. 67 00:04:28,870 --> 00:04:30,270 We're not hurting anybody. 68 00:04:30,850 --> 00:04:33,290 I don't want anything to do with this. This is wrong. 69 00:04:33,670 --> 00:04:35,050 That's what makes it so right. 70 00:04:36,770 --> 00:04:39,810 That feels so cool. 71 00:04:41,770 --> 00:04:42,970 You know what else feels cool? 72 00:04:43,190 --> 00:04:44,190 Doing the right thing. 73 00:04:44,890 --> 00:04:48,210 Which is why I'm going back home and going to bed. It's exactly what you 74 00:04:48,210 --> 00:04:49,210 do. 75 00:04:49,979 --> 00:04:50,979 Cheryl! Telegram! 76 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:54,800 Told you I'm the neighborhood scam. 77 00:05:21,550 --> 00:05:22,550 Hit me high, baby. 78 00:05:22,890 --> 00:05:23,890 This is fun. 79 00:05:25,050 --> 00:05:27,410 I feel just like a trainer at SeaWorld. 80 00:05:29,290 --> 00:05:30,290 Hmm, tail. 81 00:05:34,130 --> 00:05:35,350 What is going on here? 82 00:05:35,690 --> 00:05:37,230 What do you mean? It's a pool party. 83 00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:40,830 Hey, get ready to jump onto my shoulders. We're going to have chicken 84 00:05:40,830 --> 00:05:41,830 ten minutes. No! 85 00:05:42,590 --> 00:05:44,670 No! All these people have got to get out. 86 00:05:45,350 --> 00:05:49,030 Cheryl, why wouldn't you have a pool if you weren't going to invite your 87 00:05:49,030 --> 00:05:51,210 friends? Because it's not your pool. 88 00:05:53,290 --> 00:05:56,130 Hey, Cheryl, do the Ethans get Vanity Fair? I already read their install. 89 00:05:57,090 --> 00:05:59,730 And credit card statement. Boy, can they suck down the hooch. 90 00:06:01,190 --> 00:06:02,990 This is totally out of control. 91 00:06:03,450 --> 00:06:04,750 What? Where are you getting that from? 92 00:06:05,050 --> 00:06:06,310 Hey, who ordered a cake? 93 00:06:06,610 --> 00:06:08,970 Oh, right here. Uh, yeah, that's the cake. 94 00:06:09,250 --> 00:06:11,610 I'll put it over by the ping pong table. Thanks. 95 00:06:12,130 --> 00:06:14,110 Hey, you'll have a draft. You'll love it. 96 00:06:42,159 --> 00:06:43,760 Jim, that's not even the point. 97 00:06:44,020 --> 00:06:47,000 I mean, what are you teaching the girls? How are they going to learn respect for 98 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,000 other people's property? 99 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,440 Elf, will you get out? 100 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:52,860 Cheryl, the girls aren't going to remember this. 101 00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:54,120 They're kids. 102 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:15,920 a drawer for the day, will ya? 103 00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:20,760 Look at me. 104 00:07:20,820 --> 00:07:23,320 I'm a movie star. And I'm her sister, Ruby. 105 00:07:24,660 --> 00:07:27,020 Look, that's Lois Egan's mink stole. 106 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:29,360 Now, I didn't tell them they could do that. 107 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:31,140 You didn't tell us we couldn't. 108 00:07:33,940 --> 00:07:35,740 And they're not influenced by any of this, huh? 109 00:07:37,420 --> 00:07:39,720 I get it. 110 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,380 Girl, go on. Go back in the house. Put it back. 111 00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:44,100 Put it back. Come on, hurry up. 112 00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:54,340 How about one chicken fight while they're in the house? 113 00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:55,900 Damn. 114 00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:08,560 95 degrees at 7 .30 in the morning. 115 00:08:09,860 --> 00:08:11,040 Who wants a hug? 116 00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:15,800 You. Back off. 117 00:08:17,420 --> 00:08:22,100 You know, as soon as the kids go to school, we can sneak off to the Egan's. 118 00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:26,380 Nobody is going in that pool. Forget it. Cheryl, that's the whole reason I came 119 00:08:26,380 --> 00:08:27,900 over here. Well, I'm sorry. 120 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:35,400 Refreshing. 121 00:08:37,980 --> 00:08:39,940 And the cold cuts the funk. 122 00:08:41,240 --> 00:08:42,360 That's disgusting. 123 00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:44,240 Yeah, that's my shirt. 124 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:47,620 Please, it never looked this good on you. 125 00:08:49,780 --> 00:08:52,020 You don't have a tenth. of the bod I have. 126 00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:55,700 I have exactly a tenth of the bod you have. 127 00:08:56,880 --> 00:08:58,300 All right. All right. 128 00:08:59,560 --> 00:09:02,540 On that note, I'm going over to water the Egan's plant. 129 00:09:02,820 --> 00:09:04,820 I hope you guys cleaned up after your party. 130 00:09:05,060 --> 00:09:06,140 They'll never know we were there. 131 00:09:06,340 --> 00:09:08,940 Oh, yeah. The pool house toilet just backed itself up. 132 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:14,120 All right. I found the part for the air conditioner. 133 00:09:14,540 --> 00:09:18,660 Hey! They put it on a boat from Thailand. It'll be here in less than a 134 00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:29,000 Wouldn't it be great if the answer was as close as next door? 135 00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:34,140 Do you mean a rectangular answer filled with shimmering liquid relief? 136 00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:40,920 No, no, no, no. Don't even think about it. I don't care how hot it gets. Nobody 137 00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:42,120 is going in that pool. 138 00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:46,360 Well, I'm sorry, but somebody has to be the grown -up around here. 139 00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:49,800 Hey, Cheryl, is it any cooler up there? Where? On your high horse? 140 00:09:53,770 --> 00:09:54,870 Did Daddy talk to you about yesterday? 141 00:09:55,250 --> 00:09:57,670 Of course I did. I'm a grown -up, too. 142 00:09:57,910 --> 00:10:01,190 Go ahead and tell Mommy what I taught you. Go on. We always have to have 143 00:10:01,190 --> 00:10:04,650 permission to do other people's stuff. That's right. Even if it's really, 144 00:10:04,650 --> 00:10:06,870 hot, and they would never, ever find out. 145 00:10:08,010 --> 00:10:09,090 Pretty grown -up, huh? 146 00:10:09,750 --> 00:10:12,990 Proud of you girls. Okay, here, go turn on Daddy's truck and get the air 147 00:10:12,990 --> 00:10:13,990 conditioner going. 148 00:10:15,030 --> 00:10:18,430 Well, looks like it's time for the handyman to get a short sickle. 149 00:10:34,990 --> 00:10:36,610 cleaned everything up. They'll never know we were here. 150 00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:47,800 Unconditioned movie theater because someone wouldn't let us use the P -O -O 151 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:50,420 Daddy, we know this girl's cool. 152 00:11:51,560 --> 00:11:54,520 And you are the smartest girl in the whole world. 153 00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:56,520 Ooh, that's sarcasm, right? 154 00:12:01,180 --> 00:12:02,240 Very good. 155 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:06,520 I like these girls. You sure you don't want to join us? No, no, honey, I'd love 156 00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:07,980 to, but I've got so much work to do. 157 00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:34,090 swim stuff in the garage. 158 00:12:34,630 --> 00:12:36,370 You know Jim, no willpower. 159 00:12:38,430 --> 00:12:39,430 Garage is that way. 160 00:12:41,130 --> 00:12:42,130 I know. 161 00:12:44,410 --> 00:12:46,870 Do you need a sun hat to put swim stuff away? 162 00:12:48,230 --> 00:12:49,890 And a swim suit. 163 00:12:50,790 --> 00:12:51,790 And a wax. 164 00:12:54,450 --> 00:12:57,090 Is that sunscreen? 165 00:13:02,350 --> 00:13:04,130 going over to swim at the Egan's pool. 166 00:13:04,810 --> 00:13:09,630 Screw it. It's too hot to lie. 167 00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:14,050 Yes, I'm going swimming because I'm the oldest and I can do whatever I want. 168 00:13:14,110 --> 00:13:15,430 Happy? No, Cheryl. 169 00:13:15,630 --> 00:13:16,630 No. 170 00:13:16,810 --> 00:13:17,810 I'm not happy. 171 00:13:18,050 --> 00:13:21,330 Not happy about the example you're setting for our nieces and nephew. 172 00:13:22,210 --> 00:13:23,290 They deserve better. 173 00:13:25,850 --> 00:13:30,350 All right, well, you can stand there in sweaty judgment of me or... 174 00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:32,310 We can all go swimming. 175 00:13:32,650 --> 00:13:34,830 Great! We're wearing our swimsuits already. 176 00:13:35,770 --> 00:13:36,990 And we waxed. 177 00:13:38,010 --> 00:13:40,110 But, not a word to Jim. 178 00:13:40,550 --> 00:13:43,810 Hey, you don't bring up the wax, we won't bring up the swim. 179 00:13:49,310 --> 00:13:55,290 Andy, you're late again. That's three days in a row. 180 00:13:55,510 --> 00:13:56,510 Where you been? 181 00:13:56,690 --> 00:13:57,690 Oh, here and there. 182 00:13:58,050 --> 00:13:59,050 What you been doing? 183 00:13:59,490 --> 00:14:00,490 Oh, this and that. 184 00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:03,900 What's that funny smell? 185 00:14:04,940 --> 00:14:08,700 Jim, it's 100 degrees outside. My funny smells are just beginning. 186 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:12,500 What's with your eyes? 187 00:14:14,140 --> 00:14:16,920 Nothing. Baby blue, just like always. No, no, no. 188 00:14:18,060 --> 00:14:21,340 No, no, no. They're all bloodshot. You've been late for three days. What's 189 00:14:21,340 --> 00:14:22,119 on here? 190 00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:23,019 All right, Jim. 191 00:14:23,020 --> 00:14:24,560 You're going to find out sooner or later. 192 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:27,480 I've been drinking my breakfast. 193 00:14:29,220 --> 00:14:31,600 No. That doesn't smell like alcohol. 194 00:14:32,620 --> 00:14:35,500 Smells like chlorine. 195 00:14:37,300 --> 00:14:40,040 Yeah, yeah, it's pretty bad, Jim. 196 00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:43,460 I've been drinking chlorine. 197 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:46,280 A friend of mine, he turned me on to it. 198 00:14:47,260 --> 00:14:50,840 You know, you can't stop once you... Andy! 199 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:55,400 Fine. I've been swimming down at the Egan's pool. 200 00:15:01,370 --> 00:15:03,470 No, no, but it's not my fault, Jim. 201 00:15:03,850 --> 00:15:05,010 Somebody made me do it. 202 00:15:05,830 --> 00:15:07,310 She threatened me not to tell. 203 00:15:07,930 --> 00:15:10,650 It's one of my sisters and you're sleeping with her. 204 00:15:13,270 --> 00:15:14,270 Cheryl? 205 00:15:15,350 --> 00:15:16,430 Why was that a question? 206 00:15:45,580 --> 00:15:48,960 I just kind of want to hang out at home and be with you. 207 00:15:49,180 --> 00:15:50,920 Just you and me together. 208 00:15:51,380 --> 00:15:52,480 All day. 209 00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:54,160 All day? 210 00:15:55,740 --> 00:15:58,400 Well, won't that be fun? 211 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:01,600 Wait! 212 00:16:02,900 --> 00:16:04,260 That's not man's work. 213 00:16:10,380 --> 00:16:12,780 You know what would make this day extra special? 214 00:16:13,790 --> 00:16:15,830 If you went and picked up lunch at Stevie B's. 215 00:16:16,170 --> 00:16:17,550 Stevie B's ribs? 216 00:16:17,850 --> 00:16:19,530 Oh, you know how I like all meat meals. 217 00:16:20,790 --> 00:16:25,070 All right, but you know what? Stevie B's is all the way across town. It's going 218 00:16:25,070 --> 00:16:27,770 to take me at least an hour to go there and come back. I'm good with that. 219 00:16:29,870 --> 00:16:30,870 Oh, well. 220 00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:36,410 I mean, honey, every second away from you is an eternity. 221 00:16:36,930 --> 00:16:42,470 But a special lunch like that would certainly deserve a special dessert. 222 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:44,920 if you know what I'm saying. 223 00:16:46,060 --> 00:16:48,060 I always know what you're saying. 224 00:16:49,980 --> 00:16:50,980 Sex, right? 225 00:16:53,780 --> 00:16:55,920 Okay. Yes! That's it for me! 226 00:17:03,580 --> 00:17:04,579 Cheryl? 227 00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:08,960 Oh, 228 00:17:09,660 --> 00:17:11,760 I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. No, no. 229 00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:15,720 I just forgot. I forgot to ask you, do you want spicy or mild barbecue sauce on 230 00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:16,319 your ribs? 231 00:17:16,319 --> 00:17:18,380 Oh, I don't care. You know, whatever takes longer. 232 00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:21,520 I got you. 233 00:17:23,180 --> 00:17:24,300 Well, what are you looking for? 234 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,000 Oh, nothing. 235 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:27,940 Nothing, huh? Are you sure? 236 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:29,200 Mm -hmm. 237 00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:31,240 You think it could be this? 238 00:17:35,020 --> 00:17:36,020 No. 239 00:17:47,110 --> 00:17:48,110 Funny to me. 240 00:17:48,130 --> 00:17:50,730 But of course, I'm not the grown -up here. 241 00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:55,490 He's true? 242 00:17:55,930 --> 00:17:57,570 Everything except for my evil laugh. 243 00:18:01,370 --> 00:18:03,190 Tim! You're burning daylight! 244 00:18:04,690 --> 00:18:06,790 The Eagles are going to be home tonight. Come on. 245 00:18:07,210 --> 00:18:11,090 I just need one more swim. One more swim? Just one more swim? 246 00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:12,189 And then what? 247 00:18:12,190 --> 00:18:13,129 Another pool? 248 00:18:13,130 --> 00:18:14,069 And then another? 249 00:18:14,070 --> 00:18:15,150 When's it going to end, Cheryl? 250 00:18:25,420 --> 00:18:26,420 You're right. 251 00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:17,910 You are out of control. 252 00:19:18,450 --> 00:19:19,550 And you want to know why? 253 00:19:19,870 --> 00:19:20,869 Because I'm awful? 254 00:19:20,870 --> 00:19:21,870 Yes. 255 00:19:21,930 --> 00:19:23,810 You are awful at being bad. 256 00:19:24,790 --> 00:19:25,890 You're too perfect. 257 00:19:26,190 --> 00:19:29,090 Look, you've got to be a little bad once in a while. 258 00:19:29,550 --> 00:19:32,590 Look what it did for me. I mean, look at me. Look how much younger I look than 259 00:19:32,590 --> 00:19:33,590 my age. 260 00:19:35,290 --> 00:19:40,410 Um, we can't just tell the kids it's okay to be a little bad once in a while. 261 00:19:40,410 --> 00:19:41,389 course not. 262 00:19:41,390 --> 00:19:42,750 Right. We don't tell them anything. 263 00:19:43,690 --> 00:19:45,820 That's a great... thing about being parents. 264 00:19:46,120 --> 00:19:48,700 You can do whatever you want as long as you've got a good cover story. 265 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:54,120 That's not in any of the books I've read. Of course not. You read those 266 00:19:54,120 --> 00:19:55,120 books. 267 00:19:56,620 --> 00:19:59,340 Did you take the day off just to bust me? 268 00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:05,280 I took the day off so I could go swimming with my bad, bad wife. 269 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,180 I am going to go get my trucks. 270 00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:11,640 Oh, no you don't. 271 00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:13,780 Bad boys don't wear trucks. 272 00:20:16,910 --> 00:20:18,390 If you know what I'm saying. 273 00:20:19,410 --> 00:20:20,870 Of course I do. 274 00:20:22,330 --> 00:20:23,330 Make it right. 275 00:20:24,850 --> 00:20:25,850 Yes, Jim. 276 00:20:33,250 --> 00:20:36,910 I'm a love shark, and I see a sexy stripper. 19461