All language subtitles for meet_the_browns_s04e09_the_instigator

Oh, let me get some breakfast started
here.

Yep.

Oh, I wouldn't eat that.

Good morning, Mr. Brown. There you go,
Carver. Oatmeal, just like you like it.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Brown.

Is this oatmeal or backer?

Uh, what's wrong with it?

Nothing, if you want to use it to fix
the crack in the ceiling.

Take a spoon and stir it around and
loosen it up. Well, I don't want to make

angry. Well, you should have got it when
it was fresh.

When was that?

Thursday.

Morning,

folks. Oh, hey, Colonel. Where's your
insignificant other?

Very funny, Brown.

Listen, I was on my way to pick up a
paper and I realized I left my wallet at

home. Oh, well, you're in luck. Here,
here's all your paper right there. Oh,

thanks. Here you go.

Well, this is yesterday's paper.

You can still use it to housebreak,
can't you?

Well, just give me a dollar.

I don't loan friends money. It ruins
friendship.

Well, you borrow money from me all the
time. I borrow. I don't loan.

And you don't pay back.

I'll get you out of my face. Here, a
dollar, right?

Curry, give me a dollar.

Give me a dollar.

All right, and I expect my dollar back.

Okay, Colonel. Here, Colonel. I expect a
dollar fifty back.

A dollar fifty?

That's a rip -off.

That ain't no rip -off, that's interest.

Either that or you can have Edna come
chase the mice from under the porch.

So wait a minute, you're trying to tell
me it's a blanket with sleeves?

You sure there ain't no rope?

Okay, give me two of them.

My name?

My name is Dr.

William Brown.

No, I'm not the doctor that killed the
man in the house pillow.

No, he was already dead. He woke up
dead.

That was my... I mean, that was... Never
mind. Can I get the blanket? Thanks.

My credit card number? Hold on, let me
get it.

Okay, it's right here.

My number is 555 -5555 -54321.

Six weeks.

Okay. Thank you.

Great news, Brown!

What? They found a cure for ugliness in
Edna. They gonna treat her. Thank the

Lord! No, Brown. Be serious.

They gonna treat you, then? No.

I won the lottery.

What?

$100 ,000!

Okay, win. Stop.

Win. Win.

Yesterday, I bought the ticket when I
left your house. Okay, I thought you was

gonna buy paper to line Edna's cage.

No, Brown. I saw the jackpot. I took the
money that you gave me. I played, and

now I'm rich!

We rich!

We rich!

Hey, why you two dancing?

What's going on? What is it?

Colonel, we hit the lottery jackpot. We
rich. We rich. We rich. We rich.

Wait, wait, wait.

Why are you two dancing?

Colonel, you used the dollar that you
got from me to buy the lottery ticket,

we rich.

No, no, no, no, Brown. You was confused
with those clothes you're wearing.

Yes, you confused, Mr. Brown. Yeah, tell
him, Cora. Yes, because that was the

dollar Colonel used. I gave it. So we...

Wait a minute.

What? Why are you... This is my money.

Lock the door.

Unplug the phone. We got a situation.

Yes, we got a situation.

Look here, Colonel.

Because you used that dollar that I gave
you that Curry gave me to buy the

lottery ticket, so you're going to give
me that ticket or you're going to become

a skew?

Wait, wait. Hold on, Mr. Perry. Wait,
wait.

Yeah, yeah, brother.

What was I thinking? You're right. What
was I thinking?

Here you go.

What is this?

It's a dollar fifty like we agreed.

This is...

Mr. Justice, I want the ticket.

Wait,

wait, wait, Mr. Brown. That's not the
way you handle this.

Colonel, you know deep down within your
heart that that money is as much ours as

it is yours.

You're right, Cora. You're right.

Well, I guess we'll just, we'll share.
Yeah, 70 -30.

Are you alive? Who do you think we are?
You think we crazy?

Ain't nobody in here crazy.

We're going to split it 30 -70.

No, 50 -50.

Straight down the middle. 50 -50?

You know what? Make my check out to
Leroy S. Brown.

The S is for stacking dollars and
stinking rich.

I'm just trying to get rich. I like it.

Keep your eyes on the cards.

Last chance for bets.

Where's the king?

Sure thing.

Because if you lose, you're going home
bucket naked.

Here come the Huxtables. I'm going to
get those draws later.

What kind of trick?

How to make their money disappear?

You know, Renee, for such an easy job,
you could be a little more efficient.

Are you saying I don't do my job?

No, that's not what she's saying.

Wait. Yeah, that is what she's saying.

I'm not only good at my job, I could do
Sasha's job with my eye closed.

That's how you do yours.

And all you do is tell people what to
do.

I do not. Yes, you do. Take this to
surgery.

You know, being a charge nurse is
actually a big responsibility.

And my job isn't.

Who do you think schedules surgeries and
appointments?

Who?

I don't know. But when you find out,
tell them they do a great job.

So do you want to find out?

Oh, bring it.

You consider it brought, sister girl.

She is so corny.

Baby, you really think this is a good
idea?

I think it's a great idea, because Sasha
needs to know who really does the work

around here.

I'm talking to Sasha.

Oh, that baby.

Oh, no, no, no, no. You see, I got this,
baby.

You know, I think it's time that I show
Renee she does nothing compared to me.

Cool, cool, cool. Then we'll switch jobs
for a day, and whoever loses has to buy

the other one dinner.

You are so on.

So on.

Bring it. Come on, baby.

No, I don't want to be the judge.

I'm just going to stay out of this. Why?

Are you afraid your wife is going to
lose?

Whatever happens, it's going to end
badly.

Okay. Come on, baby. Let's shake on it.
Come on.

What's up? What you got?

That's fine.

You want the important job?

Thank you.

Is that the phone I hear ringing? It's
ringing, baby.

station can i help you i most certainly
can transfer you

this is gonna be a piece of cake girl
this

is ridiculous okay

you been shopping in i needed these
things i have you needed some new shoes

these old things i've been having these
for months you're a liar only thing

you've been having for months are them
coins on your feet what did you buy

canceling headphones right here i put
these on i can't hear nothing them

don't work yes they do hey hey everyone
congratulations

Thank you, Dora. I'm going to go get us
something to celebrate, okay?

Edna, let me tell you. You know, I
usually don't allow pets in my house.

But today, I'm going to make an
exception.

You can't spell exception.

Yes, I can.

E -X to the Eption.

Exception.

What was that on your head?

Noise -canceling headphones.

When I had these on, I can't hear
nothing outside of this. You can't hear?

how about... Look,

Brown, you and I need to talk.

Okay, come on, what do we got to talk
about?

You got to speak up, because I can
barely hear what these are.

Well, Edna and I have been talking, and
we need to discuss our agreement.

What is it to discuss?

You took the dollar that you borrowed
from me, you bought the winner lottery

ticket, and I won't have.

That simple.

You're simple.

If you think we're going to give you $50
,000 for that.

Colonel, can you put a muzzle on your
horse when two men are talking?

Edna's right. This agreement is not
fair.

What? I can't hear you. Say what?

Corra, they don't want to give us our
money. We got problems. You got to be

kidding me. Oh, Corra, you couldn't
possibly expect us to give you $50 ,000

$1.

It was my dollar, and who is we?

Well, Edna's my fiancee. She gets half.

Well, I tell you what, she must go get
half of your half, because our half is

our half. Right.

Well, we're offering you 10%, and that's
an investor's fee.

10 % is what you give to suckers.

You can't talk to my dad like that.

Oh, come to this.

Come on, come on.

Let's go.

Obviously, they don't know a good author
when they see me. I tell you, we know

when we've been gypped. Pepper, you
should have gasped our eyes out. We

do that. Well, just think about it.
Friendship is much more than all the...

Okay, guys, be

patient. I will be with you in a minute,
okay?

Thank you.

Oh, what? Oh, nurse's station.

Yes, can I help you?

And one... Oh, is that not yours? That's
not your ID.

Oh,

this is yours.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Uh, Sasha?

Well, I do not have time, okay? This is
important.

You scheduled this patient for a
hysterectomy. Yeah, so?

Well, I don't think Mr.

Carson would appreciate that.

Could you please take this plant out my
way because it is really distracting.

Okay.

Uh, sweetheart, you know you don't have
to do this, right?

Please, did LeBron think I can't do her
job? I don't think so.

You do, and everybody knows that.

What was all that about?

I was kind of getting insurance
information from a psych patient, and I

let the door open, and he kind of
escaped.

Oh, that's okay. I mean, you know,
that's kind of normal.

People do that all the time.

Okay, so you need to make sure Mrs.
Willard's room is ready for her after

surgery, and you can't go home until we
figure out who let your psych patient

escape. Sorry.

Um, Dr. Brown, here you go.

What's this?

That's Mr. Carson's pre -op blood work
you request.

Already? Yeah.

You kidding me?

Great.

I mean, this normally takes Sasha a few
days to... You look beautiful.

I did it this morning.

Great. And your hair.

Did you lose weight?

it was no big deal.

The guys in the lab, they just needed a
little boop -boop motivation.

That's nice.

Well, you seem to be hanging in there.

Oh, yeah, girl. You know, I am doing my
thing.

I am handling it.

And, uh, how you doing?

Girl, please. Your job is a piece of
cake.

In fact, I can do it with one hand tied
behind my back. You see that?

You need to cut Colonel and Edna out of
every picture we got.

Because they catch your pictures and
everything. You being too nice, Cora,

cut a neck knee.

Snatch them off. Cut a head off.

You know what? We need to take Colonel
and Edna to court.

What's the charge?

Grand theft lotto. That's ridiculous,
Mr. Grant. That's what came.

Speaking of ridiculous.

I came to talk with Cora. Do you mind?

I don't mind, but Cora's scared of
gremlins.

on it and don't feed it after midnight.

Shut up, you chocolate trick.

And let us talk.

Cora, um, I came to apologize.

I'm the one who should be apologizing.
No, no, no. Look, I let money get in the

way of our friendship. I feel horrible,
just awful.

Yeah, money always makes things worse.

The Colonel and I...

Had a discussion and we decided that
Jiffy Jiffy is there.

Oh, really?

Really? That is so nice of you, Miss
Edna.

I kind of cut you all out of this
picture.

But you know, I just hate who I became.

You know what? I got to say something.
Mr. Brown, we are talking. I don't like

what I'm hearing because somebody needs
to give me some money.

You know what? Look, your fiancee is
going to give me my money and somebody

going to get hurt up in here.

That's what's going to happen in the
mintage.

Don't be telling me no problem.

Don't argue with me, sir. Please, sir,
don't argue with me. The colonel and I

have decided to split the money 50 -50
with you.

See, Kerber, that's what happens. You've
got to get tough sometimes.

Sometimes you've just got to sit down at
the table where the table is spread and

talk things out man to man.

Colonel,

did you hear the news?

Y 'all decide to split the money with us
50 -50. Now I don't have to split your

skull.

You feel terrible, Brown.

And you look terrible, Curly. You look
ridiculous.

Brown, things can never come between
friends.

Oh, I feel so much better now.

You know what? Ain't nothing like
friends you can count on.

I'm sorry, too. I'm sorry.

Now, let's not do this.

with me.

Sweetheart.

You're trying to act like Renee or do
her job.

I don't care anymore, okay?

Look, this job sucks.

Good afternoon, Dr.

Brown.

Asha.

Hello, Renee. Good afternoon.

Hi. I've been looking for you. I have
those charts you requested.

Impressive. You know, you are doing a
really good job of trying to keep up

with Sasha.

Sweetheart, you look beautiful again
today. You know, and your hair.

Did you lose weight?

Actually, it's a little bloated, Sasha.

It's the time of the month.

Well, how are you doing, Miss Renee?

Oh, my God, I am doing...

good. I'm fabulous.

Look, we got the nurses to, um, we're
overtime for regular pay. Go figure.

You what?

Yep. Renee, how did you do that?

It was easy.

Blackmail. Yeah, those little cameras,
they really come in handy.

Cameras? Mm -hmm.

You don't have one in 306, do you?

That's on a need -to -know basis.

But,

Dr. Will, I will say the black silk

boxers i don't like them you should
really do the cotton gray ones that you

on that one time with the real fat band
okay okay renee you win it's time to

switch where do you want to go for
dinner good thing jack in the box

hey hey sweetheart don't give up okay
hold on you still get two

hours left okay you're brown you can do
it hey Hey, hey, if she wants to give

up, then, you know, give up.

Well, I guess that means I'll have some
competition.

Why do you think that?

Obviously, because you'd make a great
head nurse.

Yeah, I know, but I don't want your job.

Nope, everybody hates the head nurse.

They do?

Yeah, with a passion.

That's why I did so well. All the
nurses, they chipped in to help me out.

So everybody hates me?

We all do.

Most of us.

Some of us.

One of us. I do.

Well, Cindy does.

Who's Cindy?

You fired her.

Hey, hey, stop right there.

You turn around and march back to your
cage.

Stop looking at me.

wearing a dress at this house. What's
wrong with this dress?

It look like it come with a pimp. Oh,
you don't know nothing about fashion.

What? I don't know nothing about
fashion.

What do you call this?

Bam! I cried for help.

You just don't know nothing. You know
what? The colonel should have been here

hour ago.

Oh, here they go, here they go. Hey, did
y 'all get our money, our cash, our

spriller, our government, our do -re -mi
-fa -so?

Yeah, we sure did, Brown.

Oh, what'd they give you? What'd they
give you? Cash or shit, Colonel? No.

Cash. Shut up! Cash!

They got to have an Omicron! They got to
have an Omicron!

Where are the suitcases? Where are the
suitcases? Yep,

we got cash, Brown.

$250.

What? Somebody lied.

Both of those locked up. We have another
situation.

You take the dude. I'm going to take
Colonel. Hey, wait a minute. Wait a

What happened to $100 ,000?

$200 ,000?

How am I going to pay for all these
cunts? Oh, Cora, we all are

I'm not disappointed.

This gives me 250 reasons to put y 'all
out of my house.