All language subtitles for The.Last.Drive-in.with.Joe.Bob.Briggs.S33E07.Earth.VS.The.Spider.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-BFM_track3_[eng]

-♪ Hey, everybody,
have you heard the news? ♪

♪ Joe Bob is back in town ♪

♪ He's over at the drive-in,
hanging around ♪

♪ Watching crazy movies,
so come on down ♪

♪ To Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ Blood, beasties,
boobies, and more ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ It's a spooky good time
with monsters and ghosts ♪

♪ Crazy, kooky fun with
the world's greatest host ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ It's gonna be legendary ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ It's gonna be very scary ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ Let's go ♪

-No, that's not big enough.

No, that's not
big enough either.

That's more like it.

We're delighted
to have you with us,

and we extend
a cordial welcome to you.

We've lined up the top stars
from Hollywood

and from all over the world

to entertain you
on our giant screen

with the new,
colorful motion pictures

you've been hearing about
and reading about.

To add to your enjoyment,

we're all wound up to bowl you
over at intermission time

with live-wire service
at our snack bar,

where you'll find
a tempting variety

of favorite foods
and beverages.

Your continued patronage
is very, very welcome.

-Welcome, folks,
to "The Last Drive-In."

Ed Roberts, he always used
that word -- "folks."

Or "friend."

"Welcome back,
friend, to our theater.

The whole family is welcome,
young and old.

If you live with
or near a shut-in,

bring them to the
drive-in for free admission!"

They actually had
what they called shut-in passes

that you could pick them
up at the drugstore

or the bank to make sure
wheelchair-bound people knew,

that even though it was
a hassle to go to that

indoor theater downtown,

at the drive-in,
you were royalty.

Now, why am I talking
about all this?

Ed Roberts, by the way,

the voice
on that welcoming clip,

was the voice of the drive-in
for three decades

because all of
the drive-in trailers

and the ads were made
by Filmack Studios of Chicago,

and Ed was the voice-over guy
at Filmack.

"Time for a taste treat!"

They always had tasty treats
at the concession stand.

And of course
the most famous taste treat

was the dancing hot dog.

Now I'm talking about all this
because, well, you know, Darcy,

tonight is your birthday,
so happy birthday.

Thank you.

-But what's almost as important
as your birthday...

-Way more important.

It is the birthday
of the drive-in.

-That's right!

Tonight is the birthday
of the drive-in!

On June 6th, 1933,

the automobile movie theater
opened for business

with a sellout crowd.

Can we show that picture,
Austin?

Look at all those cars lined up

for the motion picture
experience of the future.

The capacity was 500 cars,

but they stuffed in
600 cars on that opening night.

Somehow they got them all in
on Admiral Wilson Boulevard

in Pennsauken Township,
New Jersey,

one of the first streets
in America

that was built exclusively
for automotive use.

400 acres set aside
for the first drive-in.

And tonight,
on "The Last Drive-In,"

we celebrate that heritage with
a memento from 92 years ago.

This is very special.

What is this storied artifact
that we have here?

Run that video, Austin.
-Alright.

Show how we got this.

It's hard to believe that
this is where it all happened,

this is where
it all took place.

Ooh.

That Zinman sign over there

is where
the projection booth was.

That means we would be
on about the fifth row in 1933.

Not getting anything here.

Up here
closer to the fourth row.

This wind comes off
the Cooper River,

and I can't hear
the metal detector thing.

It's just a beer can.
Oh, man.

There's a lot going on
over here.

-Right there?
-There's something right here.

-Okay.
-We got to dig right here.

-What, me?
-Yeah, go for it.

-Alright.

-No! No, no, no, no, no.
-What do you...

-This is history, man.
Be careful.

Oh, man.

Oh, man.

Wow.

It's a Zippo.

That's a piece
of American history right there.

1933.

We need to record this for --
for history.

I'm gonna eyeball
the distance.

It's row one, two,
three, four, five.

We're in row six.

We're probably between car space
two and car space three.

92 years ago,
somebody lost their Zippo.

And, uh, it's a piece
of Americana right here.

And here's what we found.

I'm gonna show it to you first,
Darcy.

-Okay.

-There you have it.

A genuine piece
of American history.

Somebody in a Ford V-8 sedan...
-Cool.

-...or maybe
a Packard Super Eight

was smoking
during the screening

of "Wives Beware,"
starring Adolphe Menjou

in the first movie
ever shown at a drive-in,

and he dropped his Zippo.

And through our
careful archaeological dig,

we were able to recover
the Zippo and preserve it.

Of course, we'll be donating
this to a museum.

-I don't think there's
any museum

that's gonna care about that.

-Because museums
hate drive-ins, don't they?

-No, it's because it
could have landed there

at any time
over the past 92 years.

-Oh, no,
but, Darcy, you're not correct.

There would be no reason

to smoke in this open field
after 1934.

And as we all know,

one of the big selling points
for the first drive-in

and all the early drive-ins
right up through the present,

is that you could smoke
while watching the movie.

Even in the years when
you could smoke almost anywhere,

you could not smoke
in an indoor theater.

So the drive-in
is what set people free

to watch movies
the way God intended.

-With a cigarette
in their mouth.

-No, in the comfort
of their personal automobile.

It's like having
a private box at the opera.

And this is exactly
how Richard Hollingshead sold

that experience
on June 6th, 1933.

He said, "Come here.
Your car is your private box.

You can smoke,
you can drink, you can eat,

you can talk out loud."

The drive-in
was a giant slice of democracy

inserted into the stuffy world
of the cinema.

-Hell yeah.

-Hell yes, it was.
-Hell yeah.

-As everyone knows,

people would even make
the sign of the two-humped,

growling, heat-seeking
anaconda in the back seat

of their Studebakers.

But we'll get into that later.

-I feel like we could
get into that right now.

-No, we're still --
-Let's rant.

-We're still doing the
first night in drive-in history

when people actually dressed up
like it was a world premiere.

But when Richard Hollingshead
was interviewed

the day before
the first drive-in opened,

he was interviewed
in the Camden Courier-Post.

They asked him what was
the advantage of a drive-in.

And the very first thing,
he said, was,

well, smoking is
the first advantage.

Then he added all the other
things that I just mentioned,

including talking to
your friends during the movie.

But he also talked about
social anxiety.

-Why are you pointing at me?

-No,
he talked about social anxiety,

that some people just don't like
going to movie theaters,

especially if they're disabled,

but they would happily
drive there in their car.

I'm gonna talk
about Richard Hollingshead
at the first break,

but I just want to point out
that right from the beginning,

the inventor of the drive-in
told the world,

this is for the other people,
the misfits,

the people
who don't like treating movies

like going to church.

He made some mistakes,
which I'll also go into.

But one thing he understood
was that the drive-in

represented freedom.

-And so that's why we're
showing "Earth vs. the Spider"?

I don't know.

-Alright,
that's the worst segue ever.

-I was trying. Someone had
to talk about the movie.

-Yes. And let me explain that.
-Please do.

-Since we are honoring
the birth of the drive-in,

I picked the year 1958 as the
peak drive-in experience year.

There were 6,000 drive-ins
in the country.

And if you were planning
to go to the drive-in,

the first thing you had
to decide was which drive-in.

And since the drive-ins
were banned by the studios

from showing
most first-run movies,

the managers were resorting to
a lot of American International,

low-budget product.

So it was the age
of the creature feature.

So to simulate the drive-in
experience of 1958 --

well, to totally simulate it,
you would need

a cherry-apple-red
Ford Thunderbird V-8

because that was
the Motor TrendCar of the Year,

and that was the best-selling
car of the year,

although I would
also accept an Impala,

a Mercury Super Marauder V-8.

I would not accept
a Volkswagen Beetle

because, you know, two things --

A, I don't like foreign cars
at the drive-in,

and, B, this was the era of
big, roomy, gas-guzzling,

super-comfy mega cars.

If we're gonna be authentic,
let's be authentic.

But to make your 1958
drive-in experience complete,

you would need
a creature feature.

And not just
any creature feature.

You would need
a giant-bug feature.

-Whoo!
-And the king
of the giant bugs was?

Bert I. Gordon.
-Sure.

-He made
more "giant everything" movies

than any other producer,

and his 1958 contribution
to the genre

was originally called
"Earth vs. Spider,"

and then it was called
"The Spider"

because they wanted to take
advantage of the success

of Vincent Price in "The Fly."

And then they changed it
to "Earth vs. the Spider"

when it went into
second-run release.

It should
really be called

"Small Town vs. Slow-Moving
Fuzzy Children's Toy,"

but it would be impossible
to call it that

when you have a musical score
by Albert Glasser,

the king of the low-budget
monster music,

whose philosophy of film music
was, "Never use a flute

when you can use 12 trombones
and a trumpet section."

And he conducted
all his film scores himself.

And I have to presume

that all the musicians needed
earplugs for this score.

If the Oxford English Dictionary
ever started using audio clips,

they'll put
an Albert Glasser riff

next to the word "bombastic."

Alright, we get it, we get it.

A typical creature feature at
a typical drive-in in the '50s

is what we're going for.

-Exactly.
-Okay. I love it.

-And I'm a baby boomer.

So in the '50s, my parents,

when I was just a little dude,

my parents would toss me
in the backseat of the car

and we would drive
to the Hi-D-Ho Drive-In,

and a carhop
would bring us Hi-D burgers

with Hi-D sauce.

-What was in a Hi-D burger?
-Um, who knows?

It was cattle country,
so probably beef.

-Probably.

-We actually lived
in a town called Earth.

Earth, Texas.

It was originally part
of the XIT Ranch.

-Oh, the XIT Ranch.
-No need for sarcasm, Darcy.

If there are any Texans
around here listening,

they know
what I'm talking about.

You know who else spent time
at the Hi-D-Ho Drive-In

having Hi-D burgers?

-The foreman of the XIT Ranch?

-No. Mac Davis.
-Probably.

-Bless his heart.

Lubbock's second-most-famous
singer.

Second-most-famous singer
in Lubbock.

Alright,
let's get to the movie.

-You got to tell us
who the first is.

-Darcy, that is self-evident.
Buddy Holly.

-I should definitely do
a better job

of knowing my Lubbock singers.

-You should.
-I'm sorry.

-What we have here, Darcy,

is the sensitive story
of two all-American teenagers --

probably not very good students

because they would
have had to flunk

six or seven times to be
still in high school --

who go looking
for June's missing

possibly alcoholic dad

after his car is wrecked
by a giant spider-web strand

stretched across the highway

so the spider can suck
all the liquids out of his body

and turn him into a
space alien carcass

in the cave just outside
the town of River falls.

The sheriff doesn't believe
their story,

but fortunately
there's a science teacher

who convinces the authorities to
pump 17 gazillion gallons of DDT

into the spider's face
and make it go belly up.

They put the monster arachnid on
display in the high school gym,

but when the local band
starts rockin',

it wakes it up, and it goes
rampaging through the streets.

Sure, we've seen it before,

but have we seen it
with a giant spider

that kung fus innocent
suburbanites with its hairy leg?

I think not.

Let's take a look
at those drive-in totals
and get started.

We have five dead bodies,
zero breasts --

because "nakedity"
was against the law in 1958.

So no deduction for that.

Drive-In
Academy Award nominations

for Gene Roth as Sheriff Cagle

for not believing the kids

but for bringing
a tanker truck of DDT anyway

and saying, "Bring your
bug juice and let's go!"

Gene Persson as Mike,
for letting June talk him

into going back into the
spider cave and for telling her,

"Don't be scared.
Just hold on to me."

Ed Kemmer as Professor Kingman,

for knowing about electricity
and spiders,

for saying,
"Man had better find out

what made this creature so big,
and find out fast."

June Kenney as Carol
for screaming her head off

and for saying, "Don't kid me.
That's luminous algae."

And Bert I. Gordon,
the director and producer

and special effects dude,
for setting the all-time record

for movies featured on
"Mystery Science Theater 3000"

and for doing things
the "Drive-In" way.

Three stars.
Joe Bob says check it out.

-Yay.

-Okay, Darcy.

It says "1933" on this Zippo.

-It's a replica.

Maybe thousands of those
in the '80s.

-Why would they put "1933" on it
if it's from the '80s?

-Because that's the year
that Zippo was invented.

-What a year.
To be alive in 1933.

-It was the Depression.
People were not happy.

-But they had to drive-in
and they had the Zippo.

-The unemployment rate
was 25%.

-That means three out of four
people were happy.

-It was the worst
economic disaster in history.

Nobody was happy.

-Warner Baxter was happy.

-Who's Warner Baxter.

-Warner Baxter was the guy

who got all the girls
in the Busby Berkeley musicals,

and there were a lot of girls
in those musicals.

-Well, they made
Busby Berkeley musicals

because people were sad.

-He did have that lobotomy.
I forgot about that. But...

-I rest my case.
-That was much later, though.

In 1933,
Warner Baxter was happy.

-Well, good for Warner.

Aah!

Aah!

-Carol. Hey, Carol, wait.

Hi.
-Hi, Mike.

-Well, hey, wake up.
This is Mike, remember?

The boy
with the golden heart

and the memory of an elephant.

Look, I remembered, see?

Happy birthday, Carol.

-Thanks.

-Well, aren't you
gonna open it?

-Not now.

-What's wrong?

-It's Dad.
He didn't come home last night.

-So what? You know
it doesn't mean a thing.

I mean, you know how he is.

-What do you mean,
I know how he is?

-Well, nothing. I...

Now, where didn't he come home
from last night?

-Well, he went to Springdale
yesterday to buy me a present.

He said he'd be back
before dinner last night,

but he still hasn't
come back yet.

-Well, that doesn't
mean a thing, Carol.

I mean,
it isn't the first time.

-You're mean, Mike.

And I don't want
your silly present either.

Here!

-The electrons jump
from one electrode to the other

because of the difference
in the electrical potential

between the two poles.

This one
is the negative pole

from which electricity flows
to the positive pole.

We call
the positive pole what?

-Anode.
-Anode.

-Correct.
The negative pole?

-Cathode.
-Cathode.

-Good.

If the voltage applied
to these electrodes

is increased
to a greater amplitude,

the electrical arc in turn
will be greater.

The larger the arc becomes,
the more dangerous it is

to anything
that may be placed in its path.

Now, one thing to remember
is that the flow of electrons

is always from the negative
to the positive.

The reason for this
is that the positive pole has

higher electrical potential.

On a simple voltaic cell,

the positive electrode
is made of copper,

the negative of zinc.

A similar experiment
to the one we've conducted here

was recently carried out
at Wisconsin Tech,

using a voltage
many thousands of times greater,

which produced a spark closely
simulating actual lightning.

It isn't the voltage
that creates the hazard.

It's the amount of current flow.

If a man were to come in contact
with a high voltage

without a direct path to ground,

it's probable
that he wouldn't be harmed.

However, if the circuit's
completed to ground,

the current
will flow unhampered

and cause him
to be electrocuted.

Now for our next experiment --

If Mike, Carol, and Joe
have finished their business.

-I can't blame people
for what they think.

Even Mother says he must have
run into some of his old cronies

and stayed in town.

He had his paycheck with him.

But I know it isn't true.
Not this time.

He promised he'd be back.

I know something's happened
to him.

-Sure it did.
Maybe he ran out of gas.

He'd never meet anybody
on this road.

Hold everything.
What do you call that?

Funny stuff.
I don't get it.

Stuck to the tree up there

and stretched across
the highway between two trees.

-Who would do
a thing like that?

-I don't know. I don't even know
what this stuff is.

You know, it looks
like there's been an accident

around here or something.

It figures.

A guy driving along last night

hits this thing stretched
across the highway and...

cracks it up.

See the glass?

Wouldn't do too good
for Joe's tires, would it?

You know, maybe that's
what happened to your old man.

-Then where is he now?

-Oh, I wouldn't worry
about that, Carol.

He's probably hanging around
some garage

waiting for a busted fender
to get fixed.

-"To Carol with -- with love.
Dad."

-Okay, so he dropped it
when the accident happened.

What of it?

-If he was alright, he wouldn't
leave it laying here.

And if he was in a garage, he'd
call Mother and let her know.

What's that down there?

-Just an old pickup truck.

-That's what Dad was driving.

It's Dad's!

-It's a good thing
he got out of it in time.

-What if he didn't?

Dad? Dad?

-What good will that do?

-Well, if he's hurt, he could
still be around somewhere.

-That's right, he couldbe.

But he isn't.

Unless he went in the cave.

-Oh, he wouldn't go in there.

-I never believed
those stories about the cave.

Maybe he doesn't either.

You know,
it got pretty cold last night.

Suppose he couldn't walk far
and wanted to,

well, keep warm
until help came.

Come on,
let's go take a look.

Come on.

-Find anything, Mike?
-Oh. No.

-Do you really think
he could be in there?

-Well, I-I don't know.

Wait a minute.

Uh, maybe I better go in.

You -- You wait here,
will you?

-Be careful.

Mike.
-What?

-You won't go very far,
will you?

People have gone in there
and never come out again.

Mike.

Mike.

-I thought I told you
to stay outside.

Now, what's the idea
of following me?

-Mike,
I'm scared of being alone.

Do you see any sign of him?

-No, he wouldn't be right here
near the opening

if he wanted to keep warm.

I'm gonna go
a little further in.

I'm going with you.

Okay.

It's no use.

He doesn't seem to be
in here either.

-Oh, let's not give up yet.
Please, Mike.

-Who said anything
about giving up?

We're just getting started.

Now, this cave is supposed
to go way back

under that mountain forever.

Dad...Dad.

Dad...Dad!

Dad...Dad!

Dad...Dad!

Dad...Dad.

Dad...Dad!

-Egads.

-How will we ever find him
in a place this big?

Mike, let's go this way.

Dad.

Dad!

Dad!

Dad!

Dad?

Oh, Mike!

Mike, I-I think
we better go back.

-I think you're right.

-But I-I can't go without...

-Alright.

We might as well look
a little further, I guess.

-Mike, I can't see.

-Are you okay, Carol?

-I think so.

What is this thing
we fell in?

-I don't know.
Awfully sticky, though.

Can hardly get loose.

-I know. I can't.

It's just like glue.

-You know, it's like that ropey
stuff we found up on the road.

-What's that noise?

-I don't know.

This is a regular net we're on,
you know that?

-There it is again.

Mike, what is it?

Mike!

-Hurry, please!

-Darcy, I think I like
your spider better

than Burt Gordon's spider.

-I feel like
that's insulting.

-But I'm sure Mike and Carol

would never violate the
make-out rules at the drive-in.

They seem so responsible.

Stupid but responsible.

The reason they ran

these necking trailers
at the drive-in --

that's what they called it,
"necking" --

is that
the slang term for drive-ins

all through
the '50s and '60s and '70s

was "passion pits,"
and drive-in owners

hated the term passion pits.

They preferred
"family entertainment center."

Um, did you ever make out
at a drive-in, Darcy?

-Never.
-I'm shocked that you didn't.

-The only movie
I ever watched at a drive-in

before I started working here
was "Scream 3."

-"Scream 3"?

Damn, Darcy, that's late.
Don't tell anybody.

-I just did.

Crazy.

-Well, Mike and Carol

do look a little old
to be in high school.

The actors were 24 and 25,
respectively.

But Joe, who loans him his car,

that actor is Troy Patterson,
who was 35,

and I think that may be
the record

for the oldest high school
student in any movie.

So Carol is played
by June Kenney,

who grew up in Boston,

was a child actress,
a singer, a dancer,

groomed by her mom
to be a movie star.

And her dad actually gave up
his construction business

so the family could move
to West Hollywood in 1949

so that June could attend the
Hollywood Professional School

and work as an usherette
at Grauman's Chinese Theatre.

And she did several plays,

which is what you do
to get discovered,

and it kind of worked.

The brother of Paul Kohner,
the Hollywood superagent,

spotted her in 1952,

and Paul Kohner signed her
and got her a lot of TV work,

mostly in bit parts
and supporting roles

on shows like "Loretta Young"
and "Public Defender"

and "Whirlybirds"
and "The Millionaire."

And then her big break was

when she interviewed with
Roger Corman, and he liked her,

and he cast her
as the lead in "Teenage Doll."

And she did such a good job
in that movie

playing the bad-girl title role,

that she got leads in three more
Corman movies --

"Sorority Girl,"

um, "Hot Car Girl,"

and "The Saga
of the Viking Women

and Their Voyage to the Waters
of the Great Sea Serpent."

And after her stint with Corman,

she made three more
Burt Gordon movies,

which most people would
probably consider a step down,

but only a slight step down

because Burt Gordon sometimes
did work with big names.

-Okay, Darcy...
-Yes.

-I know you wanted to hear
a detailed biography

of Richard Hollingshead Jr,
the inventor of the drive-in.

-Wow.
You know me well, sir.

-'Cause I know you well.
-Yes, you do.

-The biography
of Richard Hollingshead Jr.

actually begins in 1888,

when Richard M. Hollingshead Sr.

used his parents' stove
in Merchantville, New Jersey,

to concoct an original recipe
for harness dressing.

I'm waiting for your oohs
and your ahhs, Darcy.

-Oh, sorry.
Ooh! Wow. Harness.

-Harness dressing
is a lubricant

that you put on
the leather harness

used in a horse-drawn carriage,

and it keeps the leather
in good condition.

-Wow, amazing.

-New Jersey is a place
where stuff gets invented.
-Obviously, yes.

-Yeah, because, you know,
Thomas Edison.
-Yes.

-And actually movies themselves
were invented in New Jersey.

West Orange, New Jersey,
in the Edison laboratory.

-Yes, you already talked about
that on the slasher special.

-Right, okay, so pretty soon

Richard Hollingshead Sr.
is inventing all kinds

of equally boring products.

Leather polish, stove polish.
carriage soap, hoof dressing,

castor axle oil,
carriage top dressing.

All these products
sell like crazy,

and he builds this big factory

and corporate headquarters
in Camden, New Jersey,

right across the river
from Philadelphia,

at a time
when Camden was just booming

with innovative new companies
like Campbell's Soup.

-You've talked about that too.
-Right.

Okay, so the Hollingshead
family becomes rich,

and little Richard Jr.
is born in 1900

in Riverton, New Jersey,

which is a wealthy suburb
of Camden.

They have a famous yacht club
there on the Delaware River.

And while Richard Jr.
is growing up,

his daddy transitions
from horse stuff to car stuff

and introduces the Whiz brand
of auto products.

You can still buy
Whiz brand products today.

They're just as boring as the
horse-drawn-carriage products.

But Richard Jr.
leaves home at age 14

to attend the Manlius
Military Academy in New York

and then comes home just
as World War I is ending.

And so he becomes a foreman
at Hollingshead Chemical,

and he ends up supervising
98 automotive products,

running sales
for all the polishes and soaps

and cleaning agents,
and floor wax and insecticides.

These Hollingsheads are just
inventing new chemicals

left and right,
churning them out at the plant

and dominating that business.

And then the Depression hits,

and Richard Jr.
is trying to figure out

how the company
is gonna survive.

And he notices
that there are two things

that most people will not give
up, no matter how poor they get.

One is their car,
and one is going to the movies.

And so he's thinking about this
when his mom mentions to him

that she doesn't
really like going to the movies

because she's too large
for the chairs.

She was quite a large woman.

-And Richard decides
if people could watch the movie

from their cars,
many more people would attend.

So he goes to work
like a true scientist.

He nails a giant sheet to a tree
in his backyard,

and he mounts a Kodak projector
on the hood of his car,

and he starts experimenting
with sound --

thanks to RCA Victor, which
was based in Camden at the time.

They were more
than willing to help him out.

And he figured out the precise
angle that the front tires

of one car would have to
be raised in order to see

over the car in front of it.

And he became obsessed
with this idea.

And in 1930,

he received an actual patent
for a drive-in theater.

And by 1933, he was ready to go.

And, um, he only made two
mistakes, as far as I can tell.

One mistake was that he bought
land right by the airport.

So Camden Central Airport

was the airport
serving Philadelphia,

the third-largest city
in America.

And then the second mistake
he made

is that he edited the movies.

He cut the movies.

Because one of the problems
that drive-ins have --

they've always
had this problem --

is that they can't start showing
movies until it gets dark.

So indoor theaters
might be able to show a movie

eight times a day,

but drive-ins only have
one good time

to show the movie -- sunset.

And then a second showing.

And then if they're really lucky

and the running time is short
on the first two movies,

they get that third showing.

So Hollingshead,
he wanted that third showing.

His showtimes
were 8:30, 10:00, and 11:30.

So when he advertised
the theater,

he told people the movies
were "abridged features

with all dull,
uninteresting parts omitted."

And people never like it
when you monkey with content.

And one more thing --

He mounted three giant
RCA Victor speakers

inside the screen,
and they worked pretty well,

but wind would be a problem
with them.

It wasn't until after
World War II that RCA developed

the in-car speakers that
hung on the poles, you know.

So his cost of construction
was $60,000.

He had a 500-car capacity.

And he opened with a bang.

That first year, people came
from all over the country

to see this place.

But after 14 months,
he gave up.

The economics
just didn't work.

The studios
were afraid of him,

so they refused
to sell him their best movies,

but they still charged
top price for the B movies.

400 bucks every time
you showed one.

So, for example,
the movie on opening night

was "Wives Beware,"

which was an American retitle
of a forgettable British comedy

called "Two White Arms,"
starring Adolphe Menjou

and a bunch of sophisticates
in tuxedos.

So Hollingshead couldn't charge
high enough admission price

to turn a profit.

He charged a quarter
for each car

and a quarter for each person.

And he had not yet discovered
the basic principle

of running a drive-in,

which is you don't make money
on the movie,

you make money on the food.

And I'll tell the rest
of Richard's story

at the next break.

But in the meantime,

let's get back to this ripoff
of "Tarantula," which -- whoops!

I mean the original
Bert I. Gordon creature feature,

"Earth vs. the Spider."

-Yay!
-Roll it.

And you know the other thing
the drive-in is good for --

besides making out
and smoking -- is drugs.

-In towns where weed is --
-What?

-Well, some towns
weed is still illegal, you know.

But what cop
is gonna come to your car

in the middle
of the drive-in movie?

It's a public place,
but it's a safe place.

-I'm aware.
-You're aware?

How could you possibly
know that?

-"Scream 3."

-"Scream 3."
Okay. Alright.

Your first time.
You're such a rebel, Darcy.

What?

♪ I am the captain
of the good ship Pleasure ♪

♪ Come join my crew
in search of a treasure ♪

-♪ The treasure has been sighted
from the old crow's nest ♪

♪ Be prepared to find
what you like best ♪

♪ There's candy for you
of quality fine ♪

♪ In fact, an assortment
that is so divine ♪

♪ The soda pop is cold,
just name your brand ♪

♪ The ice cream is delicious,
and it's right at hand ♪

♪ If it's popcorn you want,
well, take my cue ♪

♪ We have the very finest
in the world for you ♪

♪ Just steer a course
straight up the aisle ♪

♪ We'll have an intermission
for a little while ♪

-I can't say for sure
without having it analyzed,

but it does look like
a large piece of natural silk.

-What did we tell you?

-But that doesn't necessarily
prove there's a giant spider.

That part's pretty hard
to swallow.

-But we saw it.

-Believe me,

my son is not in the habit
of lying, Mrs. Kingman.

-That isn't what Helen meant.

Whether you believe their story
or not,

the man to see about it
is the sheriff.

-Yeah, sure.
See the sheriff? We did.

-He didn't believe them.

Sheriff's office.

Oh, yes. Mr. Kingman.
What can I do for you?

Oh, don't go yet.

It's only that
high school teacher.

Well, you know these teenagers
as well as I do, Mr. Kingman.

Yeah. What will they pull next,
huh?

Spiders.

I told them to bring me one,
and I'd believe it.

-I can't say I blame you,
Sheriff.

Naturally, I didn't call you up

to get you to investigate
abnormal insect life.

But Flynn's still missing,
I believe.

The youngsters found traces
of him out there.

You may be doing yourself
a favor if you looked into that.

-Well, you took the words right
out of my mouth, Mr. Kingman.

The fact of the matter is,
I've got my deputy Sanders out

rounding up a search party
right now.

Get half a dozen men.
Spencer, Haskel,

maybe old Jake,
anyone else that isn't busy.

Bring them here
and I'll swear them in.

Well, I'll need those two kids
with us to point things out.

And, uh, if you want to come
along, too, that's fine.

Oh, don't you worry.

We'll bring rifles in case
we run into that spider.

Anything else on your mind?

-Well, speaking of spiders,

are you sure rifles are
just the thing?

Insects have a pretty simple
nervous system, Sheriff.

You could plug holes in one all
day and never hit a vital spot.

If you want to be
on the safe side,

call the pest control
people in Springdale.

Have them send out all the DDT
they can find.

-Good.

A giant spider. What next?

Well, bring your bug juice
and let's go.

-What are we using it on?

-Does it make any difference?

-Well, I've got to mix the DDT

according to what you want
killed.

-What do I tell him, professor?

Uh, spiders?

-A 2 to 4% solution
is the usual dose.

-Make it 50.

-Which way, kids?
-Straight ahead.

-Some place.

Make a nice Elk's Hall,
you know that?

You think we'll find
that girl's pa

in here alive?
-We might.

Spiders have a habit of stunning
their prey with venom

and storing them in a silk bag

till they're ready
to feed on them.

-Then they eat them up,
I suppose.

-Not quite.

They drain the liquid
from the bodies,

leaving only the skin and bones.

-Man, what a mind you've got.

Alright, let's look for Flynn.

And don't lose sight
of the man next to you.

No sense in anyone getting lost.

Just a minute.
This is a waste of time.

You know something?

I haven't seen a spider yet,
and I don't think we will.

-You will if he's still there.

-It'd be just our luck if he'd
moved into the next county.

-Well, I don't
think you'll be disappointed.

There's something in here,
alright.

You naturally expect
to find a certain amount

of wildlife in a cave --
tats, mice, bats, and so on.

But you don't.

They've been frightened out.

Ahh!

The wildlife, eh, Kingman?

That's about as big
as they come, I'd say.

-I wouldn't handle it
if I were you.

It might have rabies.

-There. It's buried.

-You want to say a few words
over it, Sheriff?

-It's her father.

-Uh, when you get back to town,

make out a coroner's report.

Just put down Jack Flynn
as the name

and the cause of death, uh...

-It was the spider drained
all the liquid out of his body.

-Uh, just put down cause unknown

and let the coroner worry
about the rest.

That's the trouble with you
eggheads.

You jump to conclusions.

I know what I see,
and I see a dead man.

But, uh, I don't see any spider.

-We can do something
about that. Mike...

Where was the web?

-Right through there.

Wait a minute.

You don't know what
you're doing.

You -- You can't just
walk in there.

-Well, why not?

-You find any giant spiders,
Sheriff?

-Oh, shut up!
Get that DDT in here, quick!

-Come on.

Here,
you better put these on.

-I suggest you spray
that whole cavern

so it'll get it
when it comes back.

-Help me!
Help me!

Aah! Aah!

-Boy, what a pair.

They go so good together.

Super dog

and your favorite cold beverage
in a Texas-sized schooner.

Get them now
at our concession stand.

-♪ Aaaaaahhh ♪

-Hold it! Romeo.

It's time for Hires --
that real old-time root beer.

-Since 1876.
For pleasure and thirst.

-You'll taste the difference.

The flavor of actual roots,
bark and herbs.

♪ Herbs to
all your taste desires ♪

♪ For purity
and better flavor, stop ♪

♪ And have a Hires ♪

-Yes, youngsters,
oldsters all agree.

Here's a drink
for all the family.

From the bottle, fountain
and the keg, too,

it's real old-time Hires root
beer for pleasure and thirst.

Hires to you.

Patronize the refreshment stand
here for popcorn, sandwiches,

candy, ice cream.
-And Hires root beer.

-Well, they don't write 'em
like that anymore, do they?

Doesn't it seem like
the science teacher believes in

the giant spider
just a little too quickly?

And doesn't it seem

like the sheriff is
a little too blasé about it?

You know, when
I first watched this, I thought,

"How can the giant spider
already be dead

at the 25-minute mark?

There must be
lots more giant spiders coming."

But, no, Bert Gordon had
other things in mind.

And the second-act
turning point

is one of the greatest moments
in exploitation movie history.

Oddly enough,

the spider behavior
that they're talking about

is pretty accurate,
scientifically speaking.

The screenplay was
actually written

by George Worthing Yates,
who was a novelist.

He started writing "B" movies

because his uncle was
Herbert Yates,

founder of Republic Studios.

And he had already worked for
Bert Gordon

on three other
cheapie features --

"The Amazing Colossal Man,"
"Attack of the Puppet People,"

and "War of the Colossal Beast."

And Yates had done his homework.

There is a tarantula
called the Goliath Birdeater,

and it lives in the
South American rainforest,

and it is the biggest spider
in the world.

It's huge. It hisses.
It has barbed skin.

It has enormous fangs capable
of penetrating the skulls

of small animals.
-Dang.

-It has venom that dissolves
the tissue in the brain

of its victim, so it can
be slurped up like a slushie.

It eats birds, mice,
frogs, lizards.

Leg span on that
sucker is 11 inches.

So Yates was following
the science

when he said Jack Flynn got all
the fluids sucked out of him,

which is why he ended
up looking like a shriveled-up

space alien there in the cave.

And by the way,
there's a thank you to --

at the beginning of the movie
to the famous Carlsbad Caverns,

because Bert Gordon wanted
you to think

that they went to the Carlsbad
Caverns to shoot this movie.

What happened is
that Bert went there by himself

and set up cameras
for very long exposures,

30 to 40 minutes due
to the low lighting.

And then he simply pasted
those still photos

as a matte on the negative,
and he set the camera

so that the actors could move
around in this very narrow area.

If Mike and Janet

sometimes seem like
they don't know where they are

or they don't know
what they're seeing,

that's because they didn't know
where they were

or what they were seeing.

Very minimal camera movement
when you work that way.

He basically had to
just lock it down

anytime actors were
inside the cave.

Alright.

Um, I wanted to finish
the Richard Hollingshead story.

As I said earlier,

Hollingshead had a patent
on the drive-in theater.

You had to pay him a license fee

if you wanted to open
a drive-in.

And that's why,

even though he closed his own
drive-in after just 14 months,

he thought he would
still get rich by collecting

royalties on other people's
drive-ins,

and other drive-ins
did indeed prosper.

Hollingshead sold his screen
and all his equipment

to a guy who wanted to open
a drive-in in Union, New Jersey,

and that drive-in held
1,400 cars

and stayed in business
until 1983.

But even before that,

a hotel owner named
Wilson Shankweiler

admired Hollingshead's drive-in

and decided he wanted to be
the first drive-in owner

in the state of Pennsylvania.

So in 1934,

he opened Shankweiler's
Auto Park on a plot of land

behind his inn and restaurant
in Orefield, Pennsylvania,

and that drive-in
is still operating today.

Remember
when we went to Shankweiler's?

-Yes, it was super cute.
-1934.

I mean, a couple of years back,

we were the spokespeople for
the Drive-In Owners of America,

so we wanted to see the oldest
continuously operating drive-in,

and I don't think it's
any bigger today

than it was in 1934.

Still very much
a small-town drive-in,

old-fashioned
concession stand.

So Wilson Shankweiler paid
his licensing fee

to Richard Hollingshead.

But the other drive-ins that
opened prior to World War II

didn't necessarily send
in their checks.

Um, the drive-in developed
in Massachusetts,

Ohio and especially
Southern California,

where the Pico Drive-In
opened at the corner

of Pico and Westwood,

which is mind-blowing for
anybody living in L.A. today

to think there was
a drive-in at Pico and Westwood,

one of the busiest intersections
in the country.

Uh, the land today is occupied
by the UCLA Research Park.

Anyway, by 1942, there were 95
drive-in theaters in 27 states.

And some of those drive-ins
paid royalties to Hollingshead,

and some of them
refused to pay royalties.

But then after the war,

there was a huge boom
in drive-in building --

820 drive-ins
by the year 1948

thanks to those in-car
speakers that RCA developed.

And so the Loews theater chain,

which went all the way back
to nickelodeon days

and was very powerful
at the time,

they decided to challenge
Hollingshead's patent.

And the litigation on that
went on for years.

And in 1951,

there was a final ruling by the
First Circuit Court of Appeals

that there was nothing
novel about Hollingshead's idea.

Therefore, the patent
never should have been issued.

Therefore, he was out of luck.

So I have mixed feelings
about this.

On the one hand, you know,

making drive-ins cheaper
to operate was a good thing.

On the other hand,

Richard Hollingshead
really did popularize the idea.

He talked about this the rest of
his life, not with bitterness,

but with kind of regret.

And he died in 1975
at the age of 75.

A few days ago,
we went to his grave.

130 acres of lush greenery
watched over by wild geese.

Among the folks buried here,

multiple U.S. senators,
several Civil War heroes,

the heirs to the
Campbell Soup dynasty,

and Charlie Rice,
the jazz drummer.

On the edge of a quiet pond
called Crystal Lake,

the American poet Walt Whitman
was laid to rest.

But it's not why we're here.

This is a pilgrimage

to give our thanks
to the greatest New Jerseyite

of them all,
Richard Hollingshead, Jr.

Around this massive
granite tombstone

are 10 Hollingsheads,

virtually the entire chemical
empire of Camden, New Jersey.

But there's
only one Hollingshead

that lives in our hearts.

We at the last drive-in
honor the man

who gave us the first drive-in.

-Your continued patronage is
very, very welcome.

-So, Darcy,
I think you have to take over.

I'm...

I'm getting too emotional.

-Oh.

Back to the movie.

-Thank you.

Sometimes the people who do
the most good in the world

get the least credit.

-Carol.

You think it'd be better if
I talked to your mother first?

-No, thanks. I can do it.

-I really believe you can.

-The box with the bracelet.

-Are you sure you had it?

-It was in this pocket.

Maybe I dropped it in there.

-You can't go back there now.
The place is full of gas.

-We'll come back
some other time together.

Okay?

-And, Haskel,
when you get back to town,

tell old Warren to get right out
here and board this entrance up.

-Right, Sheriff.

-Well, if you do, I'd suggest
you put a big, wide door in it.

The whole world
is gonna want to come here

and take a look at that thing
down there.

-What's your idea?

That the town should
charge admission?

-That isn't what
I was thinking of.

You know what we eggheads are
like, Sheriff.

We want to know why this,

how come that,
what about the other?

It's a matter
of scientific interest

to find out what made
that creature tick.

-Well, it's too late now.
It's dead.

-The spider is.

But not the principle
that caused it to grow.

That's still for us to discover.

-Well, why bother?
-We have to put an end to it.

Otherwise, there may be
more giant spiders

coming into the world.

They may even be hatching
from their eggs

in some remote spot right now.

Do you realize
how easy it would be

for them to overcome us humans?

Then, instead of being the
hunters, we'd become the hunted.

They'd be our masters.
They'd live on us.

-What would you suggest
the sheriff's office

of River Falls do about it,
Mr. Kingman?

-Bring that spider up
into the daylight

where it can be studied
properly.

-Well, if you want to do it,
go ahead.

But leave me out.

It's not my job,
and I don't want any part of it.

-Okay, Sheriff.

-Ugly creature, isn't it?

-I can think of more suitable
subjects for my camera club

to take pictures of.

What are you gonna do
with them?

Send it to the papers?

-No, just the opposite.

One big advantage of living in
an isolated mountain community

like River Falls is
not having reporters crawling

all over the place...yet.

I'm gonna send
these photographs along

with a complete report
to Dr. Bergin, State U.

Nancy, would you get me
some close-ups, please?

-Oh, sure.

-Good old Bergin.

I had him for biology
my junior year.

You know, I know
exactly what he's gonna say.

Gentlemen, this is
a perfect specimen.

Exquisite, exquisite.

-I can't quite appreciate
the humor in it myself.

I saw it
when it was still alive.

I expect the university
is gonna want it

for experiment and dissection.

Frankly, I'll feel relieved
when they come

and take it off my hands.

-I can't say I blame you.

It is a little unhandy.

-Took a house mover
from Riverdale to get it here.

It cost me half my savings.

Besides wanting my money back,

I'd like to get the
high school board off my neck.

-Suppose the university
doesn't go for it?

-They'd better.

Do you think I'm going through
all this bother merely

because I've come across
a scientific wonder?

Not a bit.

Somewhere in that hideous
carcass are the genes

that control organic growth.

Man had better find out
what made this creature so big

and find out fast,

or we're all gonna be
in pretty serious trouble.

Usually,
if nature produces a freak,

it dies immediately because
it can't adapt itself to life.

It's what we ordinarily call
a bird spider.

The wonder of it
is it's perfect, Fraser.

Perfect in every detail.

Fraser, you hurt?!

-Are you sure
that thing's dead?

-Sure it's dead.

-Well, how come it kicked me?

-It's just
a muscular contraction.

Galvani's reaction, it's called.
It often happens.

-Not to me, it doesn't.

If it can do that
when it's dead...

I sure hate to meet it
somewhere alive.

-Don't, Carol.

-I can't help it, Mother.

-I know.

I loved him, too.

-I keep thinking
it was my fault.

-How could it be?

-It never would have happened

if he hadn't gone to get
me that present.

Now I've lost it.

-You mustn't think of it
that way, Carol.

-Why did I have to drop it
in that cave?

I wanted so much to keep it,
Mother!

-Forget about it now, dear.

You have your homework
to get ready for tomorrow.

Oh, and I forgot.

Mike called you twice
before you got home from school

and said he would be
at his father's theater.

-Oh. Thanks, Mother.

Hello, Mr. Simpson.
Can I talk to Mike?

-Mike?
-Hmm?

-You're wanted on the phone.

-Okay, thanks.

Hello?
-Hi, Mike, this is Carol.

You said you'd take me out to
the cave to find the bracelet.

-You don't mean right now,
do you?

-If you can get away.
Please, Mike.

-Carol, not today.

My dad just got in
a new picture,

and I haven't even seen it yet.

Something about puppet people.
It sounds pretty wild.

-Please.

-Okay, Carol, I think
I can borrow Joe's car again.

-Only don't come by the house
for me.

I don't want Mother
to know I'm going out there.

-Alright, I'll be --

I'll be down at the corner
in 15 minutes.

-I'll be waiting.

-I'll see you, Dad!
I got a date now.

-Where will you be?

I said, where will you be
if I want you?

-Hey, Joe!

-Hi.

-Hey, you remember
that 5 bucks I loaned you?

-Sure. It was last Christmas,
and I paid it back.

-Oh, well,
all I mean is I'm your friend.

You know that.
-You want to borrow 5 bucks.

-Oh, no. No.

Could Carol and I use your wagon
for a couple of hours?

-Again?

What's the big deal?

-Well, what do you care?

Look. We're friends, Joe.
Just remember that.

-Why don't you come
to the rehearsal?

-Look,
my mouth is getting tired.

Are we friends or aren't we?

-Okay, okay.
The car's in the driveway.

You'll find the keys in the --
-Glove compartment.

Where else?
-Why do I have so many friends?

-Thanks, Joe.
-Sure.

-Come on,
Joe, we got problems.

It's off limits, I told you.

-Look, we gotta get in.
The dance is tomorrow night.

Well, the cats will have a blast
if we don't swing solid.

Hey, let's get the janitor.

Maybe he'll open the pad.

-Oh, not with
Mr. Eight Leg still in there.

-Well, they can't hang us
for trying, can they?

Hugo!
-Hugo!

-Hey, Hugo!
-Hugo!

-Who's calling Hugo?

Well, now,
what's the matter here?

-We want in.

We've got to develop
our talents.

-Well, you'll have to use the
auditorium until further notice.

Principal's orders.

-No can do.
The drama class is there.

-I can't help that.

Kingman is just here
checking up.

Told me particular
not to let nobody in.

-Well, Kingman didn't mean us.
He meant squares.

We're the coolest zoologists
in town.

-No, sirree.

The moving people are coming
here tonight to move

that thing to the university.

You can rehearse all
you want to afterwards.

-In the dead of night?

Hugo, we're only little kids.

Mommy wouldn't let us.

-Well...
alright, you monsters.

But now I want you
to behave yourself.

Don't monkey with that thing.

-Dig that?

Now, the first guy
who steps on daddy longlegs

is gonna hear from Hugo.
-Yeah.

-Crazy.

-It's big, alright.

Hey, maybe the drama class is
through with the auditorium.

Let's blow this place.
It gives me the creeps.

-What is it, Superman?
Chickening out?

-Well, certainly not.

-Well, then,
let's stop goofing off, huh?

Now, guys, let's start with
the opening number.

And don't go to sleep on it.

Play with everything you've got.

Loud enough to wake the dead,
huh?

Play it good and loud.

Okay.

-Hey, what goes on here?

-It's a drama class.
What else?

-Alright.
Either come in or get out.

But don't stand there
and scream.

We're rehearsing.

1, 2, 3, 4.

-Well, okay.
Let's go.

-What's gotten into you kids?!

-Beat it! It's alive!

-Hello? Hello. Hello.

-Hello.

-Spider! The spider!

Hello?

Hello?

-Anyone comes for me,
I'll be at Sanders' funeral.

I'll get it.
Great guy Pete Sanders was.

You've got plenty to live up to.

Sheriff's office.
Cagle speaking.

What?

Alright, Mr. Kingman,
I'll meet you at the school.

You stay here
and answer the phone.

-Helen.

-What is it, Art?
-It'd be a good idea

if you stayed
inside the house for a while.

-Oh, well, I was just gonna
take the baby for his checkup

and do some shopping for dinner.

-Stay in the house,
Helen, no matter what.

I'll be back as soon as I can.
-Oh, w--

-♪ I'm Rodeo Joe,
big star of the show ♪

♪ Oh, I'm strong and I'm spry ♪

♪ Yippee-ay, yippee-i ♪

♪ 'Cause I drink t-o-d-d-y ♪

-Yes, Toddy.

The chocolate malt in a can

that tastes as good
or better than the kind

you get at your
favorite soda fountain.

Made with rich real milk,
not powdered milk.

-Man, oh, man,
it's Toddy for me.

-Me too.

-Me three.

-Yes.
Cold or hot, it hits the spot.

So toddle to the bar.
Take it back to the car.

Get that chocolate malted Toddy.

Toddy pleases everybody.

-Mmm. Delicious.

-Have a Toddy, Darcy.
-I'm good. Thank you.

-All of those snipes, which
are those short drive-in ads,

are courtesy of
the American Genre Film Archive.

They found all
these old drive-in ads

for us to sprinkle
through the show tonight.

Did you notice that the "Amazing
Colossal Man" is playing

at the local theater
in River Falls?

And Mike doesn't really want
to take Carol back to the cave,

because "Attack of
the Puppet People" just arrived,

and he needs to watch
that right away.

-You cannot blame him
for that.

-I guess you're right.
He's working at a theater

that only shows
Bert I. Gordon films.

And the only thing
that can revive a giant spider

that's been gassed
with 47 million gallons of DDT

is...godless rock 'n' roll.
-Whoo!

-The creature was literally
brought to life by rock.

Am I right about that, Darcy?

-Those are some
swinging times, baby.

Rock 'n' roll.
-And as they told Mr. Ziffel --

Did you notice
that the janitor is Mr. Ziffel

from "Petticoat Junction"
and "The Beverly Hillbillies,"

the caretaker of Arnold the Pig?

-Who would not notice that?

-That is Hank Patterson,

who played the cantankerous
old coot in a slew of Westerns

and had the reputation

of being the hardest-drinking
actor in Hollywood,

by the way.

But Joe, the 35-year-old
high school student

who is also the conductor
of the rock band --

Did rock-'n'-roll bands
in the ''50s have conductors?

-Apparently, yes.

-As he explains, you know,

the cats won't have a blast
if we don't swing solid.

Is that some of that hepcat
teen talk from the ''50s?

-I feel like that was
Bert Gordon's idea

of how teens talk.

-Uh, anyway,
they aroused the beast.

And Sheriff Cagle -- I have
a question about Sheriff Cagle.

Does he know he's the sheriff?

It seems like all he does is
make phone calls to Springdale

and make spider jokes.

But Sheriff Cagle is played
by Gene Roth,

who played a lot of heavies
in the "Three Stooges" films,

started out doing bit parts
in the silent era,

and then he became
a movie-theater manager

and then a builder and then
an installer of pipe organs.

And then he got rediscovered
in Hollywood in 1943

while he was there on business.

And a director needed somebody
on short notice

to play a Nazi SS officer.

And so Cagle nailed that part,

and he got an agent
and became the go-to guy

when you needed
a working-class character actor.

He ended up doing 281 roles
before retiring in the '70s.

Um, and then I guess
we need to talk about Ed Kemmer

as the science teacher,
professor Art Kingman.

They have full tenured
professors

at this high school
in River Falls.

Uh, Ed Kemmer was best known
for starring

in a TV series called
"Space Patrol."

181 episodes of "Space Patrol"
between 1950 and 1955.

As Commander Buzz Corry.

It was one of those live shows,
uh, aimed at kids

that was actually a very early
version of "Star Trek."

In fact,
Gene Roddenberry said

it was his inspiration
for "Star Trek."

But Kemmer was typecast
as a child actor

or an actor for children,

and that's how he
ended up doing movies

like "Giant from the Unknown"
and "Earth Versus the Spider."

Always trying to break
into adult movies.

-Whoo!

-But he was also
the life model for the Prince

in Disney's animated movie
"Sleeping Beauty."

-Shut your mouth.

-You have to be regarded
as pretty damn good looking

to be the model for
the Prince in a Disney movie.

What do you think, Darcy?

-A prince?
That's Prince Phillip, man.

That's theprince.
That's the ultimate honor.

Thank you.
-That is a handsome guy.

Okay.
-It's a hot dude.

-Well, now that we've told the
story of Richard Hollingshead

and the first drive-in,

let's move on to the heyday
of the drive-in

in the ''50s and the ''60s,
when, as I said earlier,

there were about 6,000
drive-ins operating in America

because after World War II,
people wanted to party.

And when it came to movies,

they had two choices --
the downtown movie palace.

But who wants to watch
a movie in a palace?

It's stuffy. It's high class.

It requires you
to get dressed up.

Watching a movie
in the downtown movie palace

was like attending the opera.

Watching a movie at the drive-in

was like gonna
the state fair.

Maybe that's why the drive-ins
never got any respect

from the big Hollywood studios.

They were constantly being told

that they could
not book the biggest releases,

and if they did occasionally get
a major release,

they had to agree to take
10 lesser movies in return.

There were lots of newspapers

that refused to take
drive-ins ads.

I'm not sure why, they just
considered them disreputable.

A lot of drive-ins advertised
free admission for children

under 12, and the indoor
theaters hated that policy,

and they actually tried
to get the practice banned.

But the drive-in operators

fought back by making
their shows better

than the indoor shows.

Because let me just read --

I got here -- from
this partial list of things

that you could do at a drive-in
in the '50s and '60s

that you could not do
at an indoor theater.

The drive-ins had children's
playgrounds, train rides,

concession stands
with full meals,

in-car heaters available
for rent or sale,

carhops pushing mobile
concessions carts, pony rides,

boat rides, talent shows,
animal shows,

miniature golf courses,
shuffleboard courts,

swimming pools, fishing ponds,
trapeze artists, clowns,

car washing while you watch
the movie, laundry service,

bottle-warming service,
drug counters,

book vending machines,
vaudeville acts, dancing,

fireworks and there was no
discrimination at the drive-in.

The first theaters
to desegregate in the South

were the drive-ins.

When Blacks were still directed
to the third balcony

in the downtown movie palace,

they were just welcomed
at the drive-in,

as were smokers, the elderly,

the disabled and children

who were often shunned
at indoor theaters.

So if you wanted to see
democracy in action,

all you needed to do was head
down to the area drive-in,

which was usually located
right at the edge of the city.

So the urban people drove out

and the farmers and ranchers
drove in.

And America met at the drive-in.

At the Gemini Drive-in
in Dallas,

where I staged the first-ever
world drive-in movie festival,

John Wayne stood on top
of the concession stand

at the world premiere
of "True Grit"

and fired off his six guns
to the delight of 10,000 people.

So try doing that
at an indoor theater.

Um, and now we return to
that drive-in classic of 1958,

"Earth Versus the Spider."

Roll it.

Did I oversell it?

-No.
You made me super appreciate it.

-In the days
of the biker movie,

the Bandidos would roll
into the Gemini,

sometimes after riding
hundreds of miles

from West Texas
and the Bandidos, at the time,

I don't know
if this is still true,

but that was probably
the most multi-ethnic biker gang

in the history of motorcycles.

They had Mexicans,
they had Native Americans,

they had rednecks,

they had Cajuns, and they loved
William Smith, the Biller.

I don't know how many
biker movies William Smith made,

but I guarantee you the Bandidos
saw every damn one of them,

and they spent a lot of gas
money making sure that they did.

-Your point?

-My only point is it's
possible to have institutions

like the drive-in that include
everybody, 100% of society.

I know that's a minority
opinion everywhere except here.

Most places.
But let's not get serious.

That's not what we do.

-Maybe somebody
held up the bank.

-I don't see anything.

Where are they running?

-Get inside!

Take cover!

-This is Sheriff Cagle speaking.

How's that call to the
capital coming?

Well, hurry it up, we
want action here.

-Get off the streets!

-Hello? Hello.

Sheriff Cagle, River Falls.

Hello?

-Get off the streets!

-Hello? Hello?

Operator, I've been cut off.

Okay, sister.

Well, that's that.

The long-distance lines are
down.

-I've got my
motorcycle out back.

-How long would it take you to
get to Springdale on it?

-Maybe an hour, maybe less.

-Go ahead, and get the
governor on the phone.

Tell him we've got to have
troops from Fort Brown.

Also, flame throwers
and artillery.

Tell him we need -- DDT?

-No good, that stuff
just stunned it.

Alright, Dave, on your way.

-Wait, Dave!

-Alright, Dave, go ahead.

-Yeah, it's still too soon for
the troops to be here.

-I know.

I thought they might fly a few
men in with whirly birds.

-Give them time.

-Hey, isn't that Jake?

Wait a minute, Jake!

Where to, Jake?
-I'm evacuating.

That darn monster run me out
of house and home!

-Which way was it heading?
-Towards Maple Street.

I've had it!

-Maple Street?

Helen.

-I think that's just right now.

Come on, just a little bit.

-Helen!

Helen!

-Oh, darling!

-You'll be alright, Helen,
it's gone away.

Help should be here soon.
Now, take it easy.

Just take it easy.

-Sheriff?

Any news from Springdale yet?

-Not a word.

Good.

Kingman says the
spider's headed south,

along the old Higgins Road.

-At least the town's safe.

-Mike, will you help
me look for it?

-Yeah, okay.

This isn't getting us anywhere.

Why don't I buy you
another bracelet?

-It wouldn't be the same at all.

-Besides, I'm broke.

Well, when was the last time you
remember having it?

-Well, it was just before I
fell in the web.

I was up there, and
then I stumbled.

If I dropped it then, it should
be around here somewhere.

Mike.
-Find it?

-No, but there's an
opening down here.

Do you think it could have
fallen through?

-Hey, it looks like there's
another cave down there.

Maybe we can get into it through
this opening over here.

Come on.

Wow, there must be hundreds of
these caves down here.

Hello!

-Look for my bracelet.
-Oh, I am looking.

Here it is!

I guess you're happy now, huh?
-Oh, I am, no kidding.

-Good, then I guess
we can go home.

Let's see, which way?

-That way.

-Okay, only this time,

let me keep this thing for you
till we get out, okay?

Come on.

-In the zoo,
in your nightmares,

in the deep, in your favorite
horror movies...

But not in your living room,
on your TV.

Don't let pay TV be the monster
in your living room.

Pay TV and cable
TV companies

are seeking the right
to charge you

for the very programs
you now get free.

If you want to stop pay TV
and save free television,

sign the petition
in the lobby of this theater.

Let your lawmakers know
how you feel

in the fight against pay TV
and cable TV.

-I'm not sure
why the drive-in owners

got their panties
in a bunch about cable TV.

But I think it had something

to do with the
pay TV people threatening

to get all the first-run movies

and -- Oh, my God,
can it be true --

allow people to watch
new movies at home.

This is actually
a continuing fight

between exhibitors and
distributors

that ultimately resulted
in a compromise.

Blockbusters get released
in theaters.

Everything else is up for grabs,

and drive-ins ceased
to be part of the equation

years ago in that fight.

A lot of reasons are put
forth to explain the decline

of the drive-in in the '60s
and the '70s.

Premium cable TV is
just one of them.

One big one is simply
Daylight Savings Time.

Daylight Savings Time
was introduced in 1966.

So then, depending on their
latitude, drive-ins that are

already trying to squeeze
in two showings,

might have to wait till 8:00 or
9:00 to start the first movie.

In Washington state, they're
gonna have to wait till 9:30.

Another factor was the end
of the baby boom era,

so there weren't
so many moms and dads

in need of a safe haven
for their crying children.

But in my opinion,

there were two big things
that changed it all.

One was the invention
of the multiplex,

and most of those
were located at shopping malls.

So you could spend
the whole day at the mall

and then have your pick
of any of 6 or 12

or 24 movies
that were right next door.

In other words,

you no longer had to drive
downtown to the movie palace.

And then the other thing was
population growth.

As cities grew,

real estate on the edge of
the city became very valuable.

And what could be
more valuable than plots of land

that are hundreds of acres
but had a single owner.

So Walmart could buy that land

and be done with
real estate acquisition.

You know, Walmart became the
number-one killer

of drive-ins starting
in the early '70s.

And then in the '80s,

people started buying Toyotas
and Beetles and small cars.

And you can no longer aardvark
in your car

without cramping
your sticky wicket.

Do you know what I mean?
I think you do.

-We do.
-And so by 1990,

the number of drive-ins
dipped under the 1,000 mark

for the first time since 1950.

But anybody
who knows the motto of this show

also knows that that's
not the end of the story.

So I will talk about this
some more at the next break.

And in the meantime,

we have a rampaging
giant spider in a town

where the sheriff mostly stays
on the phone to Springdale,

and Springdale has him on hold.

He's trying to get to
the governor

to order soldiers
from Fort Brown,

but apparently he can't call
the governor directly.

He has to send deputies
on motorcycles

as errand boys to Springdale.

And it all takes place
on the main street

that you should recognize.

You should recognize
that main street,

because it's been the
main street in dozens of movies,

if not hundreds of movies.

The most famous being
probably "Back to the Future."

That's the main street
of "Back to the Future."

And of course, I'm talking
about Courthouse Square

on the Universal Pictures
backlot.

Bert Gordon got two
very memorable images

during the rampage.

One is that crying baby
in the middle of the street,

but they don't really follow up
on that.

And the other one is
the screaming woman

with her dress caught in the car
door as the point-of-view

Spidercam gets closer
and closer,

ready to bite her head off,

and it never occurs to her

that maybe
if she just opened the car door,

she could run away,

because it seems
to be a very slow-moving spider.

Uh, it depends on
surprise attacks,

like the time it uses its hairy
leg to terrify Kingman's wife.

That's Sally Fraser from
"It Conquered the World,"

working her scream-queen muscles

when she encounters
that withered spider leg prop

that attacks her.

Oh, this was actually
the last Bert Gordon

giant special effects film
of the 1950s.

He would do it again in 1965
with "Village of the Giants."

I think Bert realized he had
milked this gimmick to the max

because he had three
giant menace films released

in a single year,

especially since he knew giant
spiders were kind of going out

of fashion
because three years earlier,

Universal had released
Jack Arnold's "Tarantula,"

which is frankly better
than this movie.

Not that I don't find
this flick entertaining.

And then "The Incredible
Shrinking Man" also revolves

around a giant spider.

None of those three spiders were
as good as your spider, Darcy.

And correct me if I'm wrong,

but was the giant spider
muttering the word "home"

over and over
as it walked back into the cave?

Darcy?
-Yeah, I think it was.

-It's a proto trope.
Is that a word?

It's E.T., a quarter of
a century early.

Home. Back to the movie.
-Shut up.

-People who collect goofs
in movies,

you know,
apparent mistakes in the movies,

they like to point out

that the science teacher
only dials four digits

when using that rotary phone.

But in 1958,

if you lived in a small town,

your phone number
might only have four digits.

Because when I was
a kid in Texarkana, Arkansas,

we had five digits,
we had a 5-digit number.

And I think Falls River
or River Falls --

What is the name
of the town in this movie?

What's the name of the town?
-River Falls.

-River Falls.

River Falls is smaller
than Texarkana, so four digits.

You know the Golden Gate Casino
in Vegas?

-Yes 'cause you talk about it.
-Okay.

Well, the Golden Gate Casino was
the first place in Las Vegas

to get a phone in 1907,

so their phone number was one.

-That's amazing.

-And they still have
the phone there.

Unfortunately, the phone dial
had not yet been invented,

so you had to pick up the
receiver and say, "One, please."

-Oh, wow.

-And Lily Tomlin
would connect you or whoever.

-Pizza.

Real Italian pizza.

Crispy crust loaded
with spicy tomato sauce.

Mozzarella. Parmesan.
Gigante. Provolone.

Cheddar, Romano cheeses.

Add mushroom or pepperoni.

Fresh ingredients.

Fresh baked.

Pepe's Pizza.

At the concession stand now.

It's ready when you are.

-We've got enough
spiders around here.

Well, help oughta be
here soon now.

Sheriff Cagle again, sister.

How soon before those
long-distance lines

to Springdale are gonna
get fixed?

Another two hours, maybe.

Okay, sister, keep
working on it.

Open the door, will you,
Simpson?

-It's Dave.

-Where did you find him?

-At the corner of
Maple and Horton.

He never got to
Springdale for help.

-That puts us right back
where we started.

-And all we've got to do
is sit right here

and wait for that thing to come
back and finish us all off.

-I was all in favor of
sealing off that cave

some time ago while the
monster was still in it.

Wasn't I, Kingman?

-You can do it right now.

It went back to the cave.

Yes, sir, I seen it!

-The thing to do is to get
lumber out there

and board that
entrance up tight.

-Boards won't hold it.
-Any better ideas?

-You're the road foreman,
aren't you, Mr. Haskel?

-I am.

-Do you have enough dynamite
to blow up the cave entrance?

-I can blow up half that hill,
if you want me to.

-Okay, Sam, go ahead and
get the stuff.

We'll meet you at your place.
-Right.

-Simpson, you've been sworn in.

Take care of the office for
me till I get back.

And call the coroner.

The rest of you boys,
come with us.

-Sheriff's office,
Simpson speaking.

-Oh, hello, Mr. Simpson.

This is Joe, Mike's friend.

Remember me?

-Oh, yes, Joe.
What's the trouble?

-I better tell the sheriff.

-Well, he's not here now.

Maybe you'd better tell me.

What is it, Joe?

-Well, it's about my heap.

Somebody mooched it off of me
today to go for a ride,

and it isn't back yet.

After what that spider did
this afternoon,

well, I was just wondering if --

-Well, it's a good
idea to check.

What's the boy's name?

Well, it was Mike
and Carol Flynn.

- Did they get back yet?
- No.

At least I haven't seen them.

Did they say where they
might be heading?

-No, sir.

-Thank you, Joe,
I'll look into it.

-Hello?

-Mrs. Flynn, this is
Mike Simpson's father.

-Didn't take us this long
to come in, did it?

-Sure it did, you just forget.

-What time is it?

-I don't know, I
haven't got a watch.

-I got a feeling it's late.

-It's still light.

-Don't kid me, that's
luminous algae.

It grows on cave walls,
and it shines.

Don't you remember Mr. Kingman
told our science class?

-Alright, but from
the next cavern,

you'll see daylight outside,
you wanna bet?

-I don't see any daylight.

-I goofed.

-Never been in this cave
before, either.

We're lost.

-I know.

-Well, let's hurry up and
find our way out.

-That's what I'm doing.

I figure if we just go
straight ahead,

we'll come to the part we know.

Come on, let's go this way.

-Mike?
Mike, we can't go any further!

It's a dead end.

-There's gotta be
another way out.

All I'm trying to do is find it.

-Mike, look.

There's something
written on the wall.

-What did I tell you?

There have been people
through here before.

"George Weston.

Lost, April 9th, 1902."

-Mike!

He must have starved to death.

I'm getting awfully worried,
Mike.

-Me, too, Carol.

-Why did I ever have to
bring you down here?

It's all my fault.

-Forget it.

-What do you suppose your
mother's thinking?

-Well, they wouldn't tell her.

She's in the hospital
having a baby.

-Well, what about your dad?

-Ah, he's pretty good, I
think he can take it.

-My mother can't.

Not after what happened
to my father.

-Don't make yourself feel bad,
Carol.

-Don't you either, then.

-You know, all of a sudden,
I feel hungry.

-Me, too.

-I just remembered, I've got
a candy bar with me.

-Alright, you men,
make it snappy.

Let's get that gear
off that truck.

-Carol always lets me know when
she isn't coming home.

Always.

But today, I don't know, she
just wasn't herself.

She attached too much
importance to that bracelet.

Oh, I hope she and Mike haven't
gone back to that cave.

-Carol, do you see, this is
the place where we got lost!

Now I know the way,
it's through there.

-But the spider, Mike.

-If we stay here, it'll find
us, come on, let's run.

There's the hole
we fell through.

We haven't got far to go now.

Come on, climb through the web.

Come on!

-I'm stuck!
-Give me your hand.

Give me your hand.

Come on.

-It's coming!

-Phil, Pete, let's get that
extra dynamite outta here.

-Well, that'll be the end

of our spider's nest, eh,
Kingman?

-And the spider.

-That's what you
said last time.

-Well, this time it's for sure.

It's gotta die, no living
organism can survive for long

once its food supply is cut off.

-We'll be ready to blow her up
in a couple seconds.

-Let her blow
when you're ready!

Stand wide back, all you men!

I don't want anyone hurt!

-Isn't that Joe's
car over there?

-Well, yes, it is.

-Massey's Pizza,
home of the perfect pizza taste,

is also home of
the original Super Saver Pizza.

Massey's uses only the best
pure ingredients and toppings,

the oldest and finest
pizza recipe in Columbus,

and then serves perfect pizza
at super saver prices.

Pick up a money-saving
Massey's coupon

at Super Saver Cinemas'
eight ticket counters

and enjoy the perfect
pizza taste for less.

Massey's Pizzas have four
locations -- in Westerville,

Gahanna, Reynoldsburg
and Whitehall.

The perfect pizza taste
and super-saver prices.

-There was something
in that burning house

when Fearless Fred arrived.

Without a moment's hesitation,
into the flames he dived.

He reappeared.
The crowd all cheered.

The object in his hands...

-"This is what I saved..."
-He said.

-It's Toddy, the chocolate drink
that's just grand.

-Yes, Toddy does taste grand.

Toddy -- the delicious chocolate
drink in a can.

Ice cold or steaming hot,

delicious Toddy hits the spot
with everybody.

During intermission,
see how much better that popcorn

or those hot dogs taste
with Toddy.

On sale at our snack bar.

-Mmm.

Delicious.

-Are Mike and Carol
just total dimwits?

-Pretty much.

-I mean, you don't
really feel sorry for them

that they're being attacked by
the giant spider a second time.

And that cave entrance,
by the way,

that's probably the most famous
cave entrance in movies,

because it's the entrance to the
Bronson Caves in Bronson Canyon,

not far from the Griffith
Observatory in Griffith Park,

10 minutes
from downtown Hollywood.

And, um, can I just say
the giant sticky spider web

that they keep falling into
and climbing out of?

Doesn't that look like one
of those rope-climber things

on a children's playground?

I mean, remember when
the science teacher looks at

the single strand of spider web
that wrecked Jack Flynn's car?

You know, "Pure silk," he said.

Really? This is a fat rope,
right?

But I quibble.

It was movies like this

that kept the drive-ins
humming through all those years

when the studios wouldn't give
them A-list titles,

so they had to book through
American International Pictures

and other low-budget companies.

And actually, it was some
of those same pictures

that made a difference

when drive-ins started
their comeback in the 2000s.

In many cases, drive-ins would
go dark in the '70s or '80s.

They would be abandoned
by the second-generation owners,

but then the third generation,

the grandchildren
of the original operator,

would take them over and
bring back the drive-in theater

that everybody in town
remembered from the old days.

They brought back
the playgrounds,

they brought back
the miniature golf.

But probably the two biggest
innovations were FM radio sound.

So you didn't need
those polls anymore.

And multiple screens.

Um, there's still
some one-screeners out there,

but the most successful
drive-ins today

have anywhere from 2
to 14 screens.

14 -- That's the number
at the Thunderbird

drive-in in Fort Lauderdale.

And that actually brings up
another innovation of the 2000s,

namely the use of drive-ins

as swap shops and flea
markets in the daytime

and then movie theaters
at night.

And it creates multiple sources
of income for the owners.

There was a week
in the spring of 2020,

when 100% of the national
first-run box office

was drive-ins.

-Wow.

-And that's because the only
theaters open that week were

drive-ins due
to COVID restrictions,

and the only drive-ins
showing first-run movies

was one drive-in --

the Ocala drive-in
in Ocala, Florida.

Um, actually showing IFC films,
our sister company.

They were showing IFC
first-run films.

And they should have
been showing, uh,

"Revenge of the Nerds,"
because that was the week

when we discovered
one more thing the drive-in

can do
that indoor theaters cannot do.

Drive-ins can prevent disease.

-Okay.
-And they did.

And now we return to
the stunning conclusion

of "Earth Versus the Spider."

Roll it.

Remember the tagline
on the poster

for "Earth Versus the Spider"?

It must eat you to live.

Genius.
-Yeah, yeah.

-Bert I. Gordon.
Bert I. Gordon didn't care

where the spider came from
in the script.

He didn't care
where it came from,

whether there might be more
of them,

how it grows, why it's there.

It's just giant spider
wants to eat people.

-What else do you need?

-Exactly.

-Exactly.
-So let's go to the snack bar.

Darcy.
-Why?

-Because it's dee-licous.

-Is it a tasty treat?
-It is a tasty treat.

It's a taste treat,
first of all.

But it's also a tasty treat.
-I tried. Let's go.

-And after that,
we'll go to the malt shop.

-Let's do it.

-Do they still have
malt shops?

-I feel like they do,
but not as...

-They have a few malt shops.
That's a damn shame.

So some of these retro drive-ins

need to bring back
the malt shop, too.

What is a malt, anyway?
I don't even know what that is.

Is that the same thing
as a milkshake?

-We were talking about that.

I think a malt is
a little thicker.

-It's just thicker?
That's the whole thing?

-That's what we've decided.

-You know what I like?

-Tell me.

-Single malts.

-Wah wah.

-♪ Baseball Joe was a slugger,
you know ♪

♪ He made all the pitchers cry ♪

♪ He was frank to admit
the reason he hit ♪

♪ Was t-o-d-d-y ♪

-♪ Toddy ♪

-Mm-hmm.
-That's the drink for me.

-♪ Toddy
-Mm-hmm.

-Try it, Pop, and see.

-♪ Toddy
-Mm-hmm.

-Man, oh, man.

♪ That's the brand new,
brand new ♪

♪ Chocolate malt in a can ♪

-Yessiree, try Toddy
and you'll agree.

Toddy is as delicious
as the finest-tasting

soda-fountain malted
you ever had.

Ice cold or steaming hot,
ask for Toddy.

-Mmm.

Delicious.

-Please do something.
-You sealed them up.

You're gonna have to open
that cave and get them out.

-Now, don't get excited.

We're gonna do everything
for them we can.

How do we go about it, Haskel?

-Open up the cave again.

That's easy to say, Sheriff, but
it's gonna take some doing.

Well, we blew up tons of earth
and rock over that opening.

Brought half the hillside down.

-Well, we better start
clearing it away.

-Take days,
maybe a week even.

-There isn't that much time.

If the spider doesn't get them,
the bad air will.

-Well, then we better get
going, the sooner the better.

You've got a car.

Go into town and get them to
send out a bulldozer.

-Wait, there may be a
quicker way than that.

See that flat shelf a little
higher up the mountain?

Suppose we dug straight
down from there?

-How about it, Haskel?

-Looks good to me.

Let's get those ropes, picks and
shovels out of that truck.

Here's where we go to work.

-You don't want to look at it
like that, Mrs. Flynn.

You've got to remember that
cave is a big place

and those kids have a
lot of sense.

They'll find places where the
spider can't get at them.

-If we do dig our way in,

what's to keep it from
getting at us?

-I don't know.

What do you say, Kingman?

-We gotta have some kind of an
effective weapon against it,

that's obvious.

That power line
across the hills.

If we could bring a cable
over from there...

-What for?

-Let's see if we can
electrocute the beast.

-Know where we can find
a quarter mile

of insulated copper cable this
side of Springdale?

-You might try the
express office.

Seems to me I saw a lot of
that stuff in there.

-You wanna go for it in
the truck, Simpson?

-Yeah.

-I'm sure you wouldn't waste
any time getting it back.

-How's it coming?

-Not bad, but we have
plenty to go.

-Carol?

Carol!

Carol!

-Where is it?

-Let's go. Can you make it?

-I'll be alright.

-We've struck granite!

-Come on up and let me
get down there.

-Isn't this the place
we came in?

-I'm sure it was!

-They've closed the opening!
-What do we do?

What was that?

-Sounds like blasting. I bet
they know we're in here.

I bet they're trying
to get us out!

Help! Help!
-Help! Help!

-Help!
-Help!

-They can't hear us.

Maybe if we get closer to
where they're working.

-Help! Help!

-Help, we're down here!

-Help!

Help!
-Help!

-Help!

-Help, we're down here!

-Help!
-We're down here!

-Mike, Carol, we hear you!

We're coming!

-It's Kingman,
they've heard us!

-This is the power line
foreman, Kingman.

He's going to help us when
the cable gets here.

I thought you'd be the one to
brief him on what we're doing.

-Well, my idea is to tie
into that power line,

take a couple electrodes into
the cave, get the spider

between them, and turn
on the juice.

-We want to create an
electric arc, you see,

so it jumps through its body
like a bolt of lightning.

-You think it'll work?
-It could.

How about electrodes?
-Simpson's bringing them.

Have you got tools and
rubber gloves?

-In my Jeep.

All we need is the cable and
I'm ready to go.

-That could be Simpson now.

-Ledge. If we can get out
far enough on it,

the spider can't follow us.

Don't be scared.
Just hold on to me.

Mike?

-Yeah, what?

-There's nothing to
walk on over here.

-Okay.

-We can't get back.

Give me that thing.

Does that sound hollow,
or am I crazy?

We've broke through!
Do you hear me?!

We've broke through!

-How are they doing down there?
Is Carol alright?

-We're going down there for
now, Mrs. Flynn.

It may take a little while
before we find them,

but we'll send up news as
fast as we can.

As soon as I get down there,

pass along the cable
and electrodes.

Keep it coming, see that I
have plenty of slack.

No telling how much I'll
need once I'm below.

-Well, don't go down yet, wait
for the equipment.

-You wait for the equipment.
See you below.

-The rest of you men
follow that equipment.

-Carol!

Mike!

Carol!

Mike!

Carol!

-Hey, Carol, it's them!

They're coming for us.
What did I tell you?

Hey, we're in here!

Help!
-Help!

-Help!
-Help!

-Why don't we split up?

-Alright, you men stay here.

-Sheriff, better go armed.

-Yeah, let's have my rifle.

-Mike!

Mike!

-Carol, look!

-Sheriff, this way!

Throw this down.

-Catch, Mike!

-I got it, now what?

-There's a rubber glove,
put it on.

Here we go.
Tell him to hook us up.

-Okay!

-Okay!

-Okay!

-Higher, Kingman!

-Tell 'em to turn
off the juice.

-Hold it!
-Hold it!

-Hold it!

-Let's get the kids
off the ledge.

-Oh, Sheriff, where's Carol,
where is she?

-She's alright, Mrs. Flynn,
we had a little trouble

getting the kids off a narrow
ledge they were trapped on.

Excuse me.

- Oh, Carol.
- Mom.

I'm awfully sorry, I didn't mean
to scare you this way.

Honestly, I couldn't help it.

-Mike, you're alright?

-I'm okay.

Guess I was a lot of trouble to
you, wasn't I, Dad?

-Come on, son.

-Go on up.

It's alright, everything's out
of the cavern, I checked.

-Yeah, thanks, Jake.

-Good night, Sheriff.
-Good night, Haskel.

Thanks for everything.

Sure took you long
enough down there.

-I was checkin' up.

-Anything left behind?
-Nothing but a dead spider.

-Well, this time he's
going to stay dead.

Dead and buried.

-Let's say at least until some
egghead comes along

and digs it up again.

-Correct me if I'm wrong,
Darcy,

but I think the first thing
Janet and Mike

do after their terrifying
experience with the giant spider

and the spooky cavern

is apologize to their parents
for worrying them.

-You are absolutely right.

And it's a super cute movie.

-And you just told me
we got a bunch of social media

about what a malt is.
-Oh, yes.

-And now we know
that a malt is a milkshake

with malt powder put in it.

That's the same kind of powder
you put in Whoppers.

-Yes. Whopper.

Whopper milkshakes.
Sounds amazing.

-Yeah.

-And now we know.
So thank you guys.

-Thanks for all the --
Thanks for all the --

-The correction.
-Malt information.

Um, this was Bert Gordon's
seventh

and last sci-fi movie
of the '50s.

It went out on a twin bill
with "The Brain Eaters,"

and it did pretty well,
but not as well as AIP expected.

And so bug movies were
kind of over.

Um, after this,

Bert branched out into teen
fantasy pictures like

"The Boy and the Pirates,"
"The Magic Sword,"

"Village of the Giants."

Supernatural-horror pictures
like "Necromancy,"

"Burned at the Stake,"
"Satan's Princess,"

and psychological dramas
like "Tormented"

and "Picture Mommy Dead,"
and Ed Kemmer,

who played the science teacher
and really carried the movie --

He had all the exposition --
was a World War II veteran,

and he had learned
to act in a German POW camp.

His P-51 fighter plane was shot
down over France in 1944,

and his first performances were
on the prison-camp stage,

but he never was able to beat
that "Space Patrol" typecasting,

and so in 1964,
he moved to New York

and he became king
of the soap operas.

He was on all of the soap operas

over the next two decades --
"Edge of Night,"

"As the World Turns,"
"All My Children,"

"Guiding Light,"

and he died in 2004
at the age of 84.

Gene Roth,
who played Sheriff Cagle,

continued to make dozens
of movies

every year, doing
character parts.

And then he retired
from acting in the early '70s

to go to work at a liquor store.

And sadly, he was killed
by a hit-and-run driver in 1976.

George Worthing Yates,

who was Mr. Bug Movie
when it came to screenwriters,

had written the best of them
all -- "Them!" -- in 1954,

the one about atomic tests
that mutate the ants.

And he had a long partnership
with Bert I. Gordon

that continued into the '60s.

Passed away in 1975
at the age of 74.

Not that well remembered,

despite his
pretty amazing output

of screen work and novels.

He wrote the original "King
Kong Versus Godzilla" in 1962,

for example,
no credit for that one.

June Kenney,

who yells "Dad" so many times
that she dislodges a stalactite,

her final movie was "Bloodlust!"

In 1961, she abandoned acting.

She got married and moved to a
horse ranch in Pahrump, Nevada,

and lived until 2021.

Gene Persson -- I didn't talk
about Gene Persson.

Maybe because the
character of Mike is so lame,

but he also quit acting
after "Bloodlust!"

He had been placed
in an orphanage at age 12,

but he became
one of the children

in the Ma and Pa Kettle films,

and that's
what got him into the business.

But he was never
that comfortable as a thespian,

so he moved to New York
in the '60s

and became
a hot Broadway producer.

He produced one of the longest
running Off-Broadway hits ever,

"You're a Good Man,
Charlie Brown."

And then he did
the first plays of LeRoi Jones,

better known today
as Amiri Baraka,

including Baraka's
most famous work, "Dutchman."

He produced three
Tennessee Williams plays.

He produced the first
five plays of Peter Barnes,

the Brit who wrote
"The Ruling Class."

Anyway, he became a heavy
hitter, just not as an actor.

Hank Patterson continued
to be the old coot

in all the television
Western series of the '60s.

He was so popular on "Gunsmoke,"

they continued to use him even
after he went deaf.

The dialogue coach would lie
on the floor of the set

and tap his leg
whenever he had a line.

But Hank died in 1975

in the Motion Picture Actors
Home in Woodland Hills.

And Bert I. Gordon, the man
they used to call Mr. B-I-G

in "Famous Monsters
of Filmland" magazine,

Bert would still be producing

and directing films as late
as 2015 at age 93,

and I guess if you looked at
his overall career,

his most acclaimed work was
"The Food of the Gods,"

based very loosely
on the H.G. Wells' novel.

Definitely king
of the giant monsters, though.

He did 12 of those,

starting with "King Dinosaur"
in 1955.

And I feel bad about this,

but I was always trying
to get Bert Gordon

on "The Last Drive-In,"

but we never had a movie
to match him to,

and then he died in 2023
at the age of 100.

And, um,
I was amazed when he died,

how little was written
about him.

He was one of those
prolific exploitation directors

whose death did not result
in retrospectives

and repertory screenings.

I wish we could have
honored him on the show.

-Well, we are.
-We are?

-Yes.
-Okay, I guess we are.

-And speaking
of honoring people,

I think we should honor
all the people

who watched your "One Cut
of the Dead" speech

and followed their dreams.

-People are
not gonna know what

you're talking about, Darcy.

-I feel like they will.
Hold on.

Here's our mail.

-This is about "One Cut
of the Dead"?

-Yes.

It's from Anthony Cleveland
of Indiana.

-Okay. "Hi, Joe Bob.

My name is Anthony Cleveland,
and I'm a comic book writer.

I'm gonna try
to not make this one too long

because I know the letters
never stop coming for you.

I did catch the Keep
Rolling segment

when it first aired
for 'One Cut of the Dead.'"

Should I explain that?

-Uh, you gave an inspirational
speech about being an artist.

-Well...
-We don't have time.

-It was more specific
than that.

-Just read it.
We get it.

-Alright. "I spent my life
studying filmmaking,

and I put everything I had

into a documentary
about a local true crime

that I had wanted to tell
since middle school.

Life caught up to me,

and I, unfortunately
had to abandon that project.

Despite this, I never lost
my passion for storytelling,

and I pivoted
to a different medium.

When your 'One Cut' episode
aired,

I was just starting out
as a comic book writer

with a surprisingly good amount
of success.

Yet the failure of coming
short on the documentary

still gnawed at me.

And honestly,
the Keep Rolling segments

you did hurt hearing it.

It was more of a reminder of
how hard

that failure hit me after
continually trying to move on.

But the segment stuck
in the back of my head."

And then he talks about
this Jodorowsky --

Jodorowsky scene
that also stuck in his head.

"I dug back into the project

and I gave it a different life
as a comic book.

It took years and lots and lots
of failures

to finally get a publisher to
greenlight it, but we made it.

There were a lot of little
motivations and affirmations

to get me here,

but I think the idea
of passing you this e-mail

and finally sharing a completed
project was a big motivator.

I only have
a digital copy available,

but I will get
the whole collection to you

later in the year.

November most likely.

The series title is
'Buried Long, Long Ago'

and is a mix
of true crime and fairy tales.

I could rant for a long while
about growing up

with Monstervision

and rediscovering Joe Bob
in college

from 'Something Weird' VHS
tapes,

but I'm gonna cut it short.
From my heart,

I appreciate everything
you've done.

Thank you for being the nudge
I needed to hear.

I hope you like the comic,
Anthony Cleveland."

Yeah, when I did that show,
I was talking about filmmakers,

especially the indie filmmakers
that I meet

who apologized for their work,
which I hate.

I hate people apologizing.

Never apologize for your work.

But the mail that's come in
since then

hasn't just been filmmakers.

It's been novelists and dancers
and musicians,

and we've had
some amazing stories,

and I'm happy that we pushed
a few people over the edge

to realize their potential.

I've never been
an inspirational speaker.

I actually mistrust
inspirational speakers,

so it was all
a little bit shocking.

-People just really took it
to heart.

-Alright, so Anthony,
do send me the comic.

I will read it.
Fairy tales and true crimes.

I'm there. Fairy tales are
full of crimes.

So, yeah, I get that. And, um,

Darcy, you know what time it is?

-What?

-As soon
as this intermission is over,

it's time
to celebrate your birthday.

-Woo!
-Yeah! Yeah!

-But first, on this birthday
of the drive-in,

I want us to honor Ed Roberts.

Uh, there's a clip
that they used to play

whenever you would leave
the drive-in,

and it was Ed Roberts thanking
you for being at the drive-in.

Ed was the voice
of the drive-in,

and therefore, he was the heart
and soul of the drive-in.

And we should honor him
tonight as well.

I'm Joe Bob Briggs,
speaking for myself and Darcy,

the Mail Girl, when I say
on this night is every night and

as history has proven,
the drive-in will never die.

-And now, folks,
it's time to say good night.

We sincerely appreciate
your patronage and hope

we've succeeded in bringing
you an enjoyable evening

of entertainment.

Please drive home carefully
and come back again soon.

Good night.